✝️ Self-centeredness is a Prison - Dan Mohler

He's not here to serve us; he's here to transform us and make all things new.

Now here's what we don't understand: self-centeredness is a prison. It's a lockdown, shutdown prison where you're under the control of everything in your environment—every person and everything. When you defend yourself, you're subject to being overtaken. It's a prison sentence. You're lonely, you're alone, you're always in need, and anybody can rub you wrong any time because they don't fit your desires. So now your preferences are lord instead of Jesus, and I promise you, self-centeredness is a prison.

Let's make sure now that we've come to Christ for forgiveness, we don't still serve a life sent to self-centeredness. Self-centeredness is the reason for every argument, every discouragement, every weary well-doing, every offense, and every unforgiveness that flows from the wellspring of self-centeredness. If you weren't thinking for yourself and you were thinking for the kingdom, you wouldn't be hurt, you wouldn't be offended, you wouldn't be angry.

The Bible doesn't say control your anger; it says put it off. That means anger is only found in a man living for himself. That means if I put it off, I actually have a love for you; I can see your value, and even if you do wrong, I understand Jesus' words: "Now forgive them, Father; they don't know what they do."

It's just too easy to stereotype and judge, to read a book by the cover, and never get to the inner chapter of purpose and destiny, and just write people off because you don't appreciate their personality or get into a room and have first impressions, gravitating toward the ones you're comfortable with and avoiding the ones that you're a little freaked out by. None of that is the kingdom of God. None of that will overtake the world with His goodness. None of that is shining a light.

Are you following me? Listen, I'm talking to God's people, so I'm talking plain. We're the roster of Heaven; we're the best He's got. He said we're the lights of the world. We're not here on a Sunday morning because it's our Christian duty; we're here to stay sharp, keep the edge sharp, and stay focused. We have one game to play called our life, and it's a short one; it's a quick one.

I'm 62; I don't know where time went. I'm telling stories of being 40 years old, and I'm freaked out. I don't even know what happened. When I was your age, I was a gezer; now I'm a gezer. You get it? Who knows what I'm talking about? Who's older than 62, and you have no idea where time went, and you're like, "What?" It feels like yesterday.

Time is skating, man. Redeem the times, redeem the times, for the days are evil. Arise and wake from your sleep, and let Christ give you light. You get what I'm saying? Come on, don't get led to sleep. Don't get stuck in religion. Don't pray a prayer to go to heaven; let Heaven come into you and begin to walk in the light as He's in the light. Not somewhat like as He's in the light. That's what Scripture says.

I can show you in Matthew, "You, sir, are the light of the world; you're a city set on a hill." That doesn't mean you have to build your church on a hill; it means you're going to walk in a place where people can't help but see the way you live. It doesn't come by complaining; it doesn't come from grumbling; it doesn't come from being discouraged. It comes from selflessness.

Lay down your life and understand life is a gift that God gave His Son to restore a truth that He created you for. That truth was lost through sin, and that truth is regained through Jesus Christ. He came to save that which was lost. It doesn't say who. It says that. We think of a drunk in the back alley; He came to save that which was lost. Something was lost through sin, and it was God's intention for man.

Now, I went to church my whole life growing up, and nobody ever taught me that. They just said He died on the cross so I could be forgiven. They never told me He died on the cross so I could be transformed, that I could actually have a new motive in my life, that I could actually look at you from a different place than I ever looked at you before.

Are you following what I'm saying this morning? He says if you're laboring, if you're heavy-laden, if you're weary, come unto me; I'll give you rest. That's not some supernatural, just spooky thing where you're just, "Oh, oh, I feel rest." No—come unto Him the way He lives, who He is, everything He represents. The truth in Him is where the freedom is for us.

If we continue in the word, we'll know the truth, and the truth will make you free. Listen, friend, I'm not being arrogant, and don't get mad at me. I don't care what we say; when you're in self-centeredness, you are not free. We can be moody, critical, judgmental; we can hold counsel in our mind that nobody knows around us and have things in our heart that nobody even sees. Nobody's going to get transformed by that, and nobody's going to know Him through that.

I decided 29 years ago I'm not going to live that way anymore, so I got alone with God, and I gave myself to Him. I didn't ask Him to come into my heart, and I didn't ask Him to take me to Heaven when I die. I said, "Make me what You created me to be so that I can live my life with purpose, so I can be effectual, and when I stand before You in that day, I bring fruit with me, and Your name is glorified."

I'm not here to survive; I'm not coming to You so You protect everything that's dear to me. I'm coming to You to give You my life because I see it was never really mine. Your life was never yours; it was always His life in you from the beginning. When God breathed into Adam, everything that's in God went into man, and man became a living being. When he got separated from sin, that all died, so man's living yet dead.

The Bible teaches you're dead inside; you're living yet dead. I found this along the way. Don't let this be you if it was you coming in here; don't let it be you going out of here. So many people come to God for what He can do for them instead of how He can make them more like Him, and they're in this rat race of life trying to survive and use God to make things work for them—change people and get things to go better—and they call that prayer.

The whole time, they're in disarray; they're fretting, they're concerned about tomorrow, and the whole time the disposition of Christ gets lost in the worry for ourselves. Come on, I know you hear that. That's not a parable; that's not a riddle. It's impossible to be a Christian for you, according to the word of God. You're not a Christian for your sake; you're a Christian for His name. That changes things in your home.

If that's true, if you're sincere about that, that changes the way you treat your wife, your husband. That changes your speech, your attitude; it convicts you; it stops you in the moment, and all of a sudden you take account for your own life instead of blaming your life on everybody else because that's what self-centeredness does.

"Well, you don't know how they treated me." Well, you don't know how... okay, so why do you let where men aren't always decide where you are, and why are you controlled by people constantly when you think you're in control? See, that's self-centeredness, and it's a prison. You think you're driving the car, and everybody's steering the wheel, and you feel this way because, and you feel this way because, and you always have a justification for your actions. But it means you're being driven by life instead of the giver of it.

Come on, these things need repented of. It doesn't make us condemned; it makes us go, "Wow, yeah, oh my goodness!" See, some of you might say, "You know, I never really thought of it this way." Okay, so think of it this way because Scripture says if any man comes to me, let him deny himself.

I've never understood, Pastor, I've been a pastor for a while, how we deny ourselves and have so many issues, gripes, and arguments. Who counsels in here besides this man? Who does counseling? Anybody do counseling in their life? Tell me if I'm wrong: 90-some percent of our counseling is people struggling with people. Absolutely, absolutely, absolutely!

Okay, so that's not an overstatement; that's an experiential understanding. Why are people having so much trouble with people when love doesn't seek its own and takes no account of the wrong done to it, and love never even fails? Why are we having so much trouble just living under the same roof?

And yet we're a church, and we're supposed to be a light that's shining, and we can't even agree. When we disagree, there's always animosity because there's a need to be right, we're uptight when somebody doesn't agree, because we're taken back—because you should honor me more, and I need you to agree. All that stuff comes into play, and we've been tricked into thinking it's all normal, but it's not normal.

You see, it's not how He made us; it's how we became. So we got to get born again and get out of darkness into the light, put off the old and let all things become new—that's Scripture.

Sorry, I'm just a little passionate about this, and I'm doing my best to be calm. I feel like I'm actually on some of my best behavior this morning. No, I really am! I'm being very calm, actually, for me. You might think I'm passionate; I'm not here to freak you out; I'm here to poke your heart a little bit and say, "Would you come with me and run with me? Would you lock arms with me and be the body of Christ?"

Let's make sure we don't just do church for 50 years and find out we never actually were. Let's not just do Christian service and attend a meeting and serve and keep a ship floating. Let's actually get formed in Christ.

See, a pastor's main responsibility—and I know I love this guy; I don't even hardly know him, and I loved him the first time I met him. I keep saying it because it's true—he's just got life in him, and I just love you. I'm sure he's not doing this just to do church; of course not!

The whole goal of a pastor is to form people in Christ so that Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, they're connected with Him, and they have life in Him and are manifesting Him. Most pastors, the biggest trick in pastoring is not turning inward and just trying to do better church because the trick is just all of a sudden we're trying to do better church to make it attractive so more people want to come.

We try to ramp up our worship, get some better voices and some cool instruments, and just live things up where it's attractive and people want to be here. But if we're not forming people in Christ, what's it matter if the whole place is full?

The biggest challenge of a pastor is not turning inward into trying to do better church, but making sure that he forms his people in Christ. Success is Christlikeness. The word Christian means little Christ-like one. Ain't that something?

So you say, "But you don't know who I'm married to." I know who lives in you. "Well, you don't know what I have to put up with at work." I know who lives in you. See, if you'll die to that thing, you'll find a grace that maybe we didn't even realize was possible, and you'll walk in a freedom that He promises. And I promise you this: self-centeredness is an absolute prison.

It says unless the seed dies and falls to the ground, it abides alone. But if it does die and falls to the ground, it'll spring up and bear much fruit. When you're self-centered, you're needy. When you say, "I love you," it's for your sake; it's really, "I need you."

That's why you can have children and then hate each other; it never was love. It worked in the moment of my life; it made me content in that season. People change—you ever see anybody say they fell out of love? It's impossible. Love never fails.

You're living in strong emotion. When we say "I love you," you're really saying "I need you." You work for me. "Don't pull out on me; don't jump ship; and don't break my heart."

"Well, I love you; I couldn't live without you." That's idolatry; only Jesus deserves that. And then the person you say it to is flattered because they need to be needed, and now you have a needs-driven relationship that you're calling a starry-eyed love—it's a Hollywood movie; it’ll all fall apart.

And we say, "I fell out of love." You ever see anybody just look at anybody cold and say, "I don't think I love you anymore," and then they are broken and can't even eat and function? Why? Because the person doesn't need them anymore, and this person still has a vacuum and is still leaning on them and needs them to survive.

It has nothing to do with love. Watch—within one week, they already have a significant person in their life, and so does this one. Come on! I've been on the earth 62 years; I'm not lying. I'm telling the truth, and it gives us away.

We have a vacuum; we are driven by need because we're not fulfilled in the truth, and we're finding our identity through each other, and that's why we're broken because there's not a lot of mercy there. If I wake up every day and need you to decide who I am, I'm only as good as you're doing me.

But if I wake up in Christ every day and I don't need you, I can actually finally love you. Yeah! And I just wake up to shine. Now you can't even break my heart; you don't owe me a thing; there's no unwritten expectations that can be violated.

Want to know what's amazing? That's how my marriage works. My wife doesn't owe me a thing. Women, say "Amen," brother! She doesn't owe me a thing. I wake up to live like Christ; I wake up to shine; I wake up to be like Him.

My wife has no ability to break my heart. You say, "Yeah, but..." Yeah, you just be careful! I've been through a lot of stuff in my life. My wife has no ability to break my heart. If she's in trouble, I don't have a problem; she's in trouble.

When I was in trouble, Jesus was on the cross. When she's in trouble, why ain’t I laying down my life? He didn't say sing to me and pray to me when you're overwhelmed; He said, "Follow me."

He said, "And the things I do, you'll do if you're a believer, and nothing will even be impossible for you if you believe." He said, "Greater things will you do because I go to the Father." Amen!

Oh, I'm onto something! You and I are going to live this way the rest of my life, and you don't have to run with me. You can say I'm crazy; you could say I'm out of my mind, but I'm probably out of yours.

I'm asking you: will you run with me? Will you sit under these men and make sure you're surrendered so they're plowing in good ground and sowing seed in good soil so we're not just doing church?

Let them not do church; let's be church. Let's be church!

Do these men justice. I went to church until I was 18. The pastor I sat under, I went over; I saw him pumping gas. Then I did a little stint with my wife, and I saw that pastor after I got saved. I saw him pumping gas. I parked my car and went over and talked to him. He said, "Yeah, I remember you."

I said, "I just want to apologize. I was coming to church just to keep my wife happy because she was on my back about not coming to church, and I thought if I could keep her at peace, I'll just go bite the bullet and go."

But I was insincere, and I never came from my heart. I'm sure seeds got in me because I am radically saved now, and I'm just telling you I'm sorry for coming to your church all them times and not being sincere. That's what I did. I felt like I needed to do it. He was like, "Man, I'm just happy you're saved. Come here."

He gave me a big hug, and I said, "Yeah, that was 29 years ago," and you could see it hasn't wore off.

Settle down, Dan. Settle down. No, I'm free! I'm free from me! I'm not carrying a weight and burden of care and insecurity and identity crisis. What do people think about me, and will I feel—well, that shouldn't—well, that hurt.

What is that? That's a self-centered mess that needs born again. You know, every addictive behavior is connected to a low esteem and an identity crisis. People not knowing who they are and the value of their life, so they live up to the low level in which they see themselves.

If a man knew who he was, he would never, ever, couldn't even ever be addicted to pornography if he knew who he was. Because if he knew who he was, they need to know the value of the people that are being exploited, that are deceived, that are hurting, and they'd see people for who they really are instead of get a little moment of temporal gratification out of whatever.

What is that? See it for what it is! A man could never be bound in pornography if he had any idea who he was. It's not always a spirit and an evil spirit; it's just people don't know who they are, and they're in survival mode, and they're trying to get by and meet needs and fulfill feelings and desires that actually all go away when you surrender your life in prayer.

Oh, they do! I can show you in Galatians; if you live by the Spirit, you won't fulfill the lust of the flesh. I can show you in First Peter 4; he who has suffered in the flesh has ceased from sin.

Freaks the body of Christ out! But the word of God says that; that's not my sermon; that's the word of the Lord.

Well, yeah, but brother, we're always sinning; we're always—nobody's perfect! What are you trying to say? You're freaking me out! Read your Bible. I'm not even talking perfection; I'm talking purity. Suffering in the flesh ceases from sin.

Why don't we take grace as far as it'll take us instead of selling ourselves cheap non-stop? Well, brother, we're always going to sin—what are you trying to prove? Just justify your everyday?

Come on, we're supposed to reckon; Romans 6 says reckon yourselves dead indeed to sin, but alive unto God in Christ Jesus. This is my question, and I'm not being mean, I'm not being rude; I'm stirring you.

Listen, how many of us this morning woke up and even thought about being dead to sin and alive unto God? How many even thought about that and being righteous in His sight and clean and accepted and pure and holy and above reproach? Colossians 1!

Sorry, I read the Bible and I believe it. You don't have to be afraid you'll get like me. You don't have to be like me! Don't say, "I ain't reading my Bible if I'm going to be like that!" Don't be afraid of that, but go after the truth.

Because I don't know about you—I was bound in my life for 33 years, and now I wake up and enjoy every day. I wake up; it's never a dread. It has nothing to do with my circumstances; it has to do with the truth that I'm living by, and there's always grace to shine.

So if I'm done wrong, I don't live done wrong. I overcome evil with good; I cover a multitude of sins with love. I don't talk about the wrong, backbite, and make it bigger and keep it alive. I just see people don't know who they are; they wouldn't live the way they're living.

So I put compassion in my heart, not frustration. And all of a sudden, I don't even know how to be angry at you anymore; I just know how to believe for you. Yay!

So where do we go from here? You weigh in your heart today: why do I come to this church? Why do I say I'm a Christian? Why am I saved? What motivated me to even be a part of this community and say I'm a Christian?

Because there's a lot of motives in people. That's what I found out, and you'll never rise above your motive. The why! You'll find you out; you can only fly as high as your why.

If you're just a Christian just to be a part of community and you want your kids to grow up in church, then this is probably too much for you. But it's the Bible, and it's the whole reason that Christ came.

He said to Adam, "The day you eat of the tree is the day you surely die." Did you all know that's in your Bible? When he ate of the tree, did he die? He didn't fall over dead!

Well, then I wonder what happened because He said, "The day you eat of the tree is the day you die," and God doesn't lie, so something had to die. I wonder what died.

The image—in Romans 5, it says every man since that day was born into Adam, and you must be born again. And you know what, friend? We turned that into a prayer that takes me to Heaven instead of a new life that's restored through Christ instead of Heaven coming back into me and a new mentality, a new motive, a new reason for being.

And all of a sudden, I wake up every day. I could show you in the Bible, it's called...

Look real quick, since I have a little time; might as well read out of the Bible.

I teased on Friday, "Make the meeting legal!" No, there's always somebody saying, "He stood there the whole time and never even opened his Bible; didn't even read a Scripture!" I quoted 54 of them—Philippians chapter 1, watch this verse 27.

Watch this, I'm not being mean, I'm challenging your heart this morning. Let's not get led to sleep; we got to make sure we just don't get led to sleep and get in a groove of something like a tradition of something that's not producing life.

And when it comes right down to it, we're really not even encouraged when it comes right down to it; we're just trying to get through the week. You know, it's that "Thank God it's Friday" thing. Wednesday's just as much a gift because you got people around you, and you can live in Christ.

I travel all the time; people say, "Well, you... they talk about travel." They say, "Well, you, you know what I'm talking about—you travel all the time." And I'm thinking, "I don't even have a clue what you're talking about!"

They're talking about being exasperated and people, and we're on the earth for people! Sitting on a plane, don't have room for their luggage, people butting in line—all that stuff bothering people that are supposed to be Spirit-filled. It freaks me out!

"Your seat? What about your seat? Sit down! Which, the middle? Somebody's got to sit in the middle! Why can't it be you? Just sit down; you got somebody on both sides."

Hey, I went on an airplane; I fly so much, they treat me like a president. I never pick my seats; they just give me seats. They put me in first class most of the time, but I had this— to me it's the best seat—it's right behind the bulkhead, and it's against the window.

And I'm flying straight to California; that's a good seat! I can stretch my legs out, I can put my foot up on the edge of the bulkhead, and I can lay my head against the wall. Dude, I'm in the heaven seat!

I turned the corner, and there's a Middle Eastern, like an Indian man sitting there. His wife had a little red circle, and other lady had a little red circle, and he's in my chair! So I turned the corner, and you know how you do, you're like, I know that's my seat!

You look, and he says, "Oh, this, this your seat, sir?" I said, "Yeah." He said, "I was hoping that I could just stay here and sit with my family and you could exchange for my seat." And I said, "Okay."

I said, "See, a lot of people would say, 'Not a chance, pal; I paid for the ticket. You'll see your family when we land in California; they'll be fine. I'll make sure of it!' That's exactly what they would say. I fly all the time; that's exactly what they say."

I said, "What is your seat?" He said, "34E." 34E is two rows from the back, and it's in the middle on the left side! I'm not being rude; I just told him, "Okay!"

I'm not being rude when I tell the story; I'm just being honest.

I went back to my seat, and there's two ladies in the aisle and the window, and they're very large women; they have the handles up, and I can hardly see my seat! Wow, the computer doesn't know their size, right? They're uncomfortable; they're thinking, "Wow, we made out!" No, nobody's going to sit here.

And then I come up the aisle, and they're going, "Oh no, he's coming!" I went up, I gave my seat to sit here!

That man was a little skinny guy, Middle Eastern, skinny guy; he'd fit right in there like a Lego! I walked back—those ladies had terror in their eyes because somehow I have to sit on the little bit of seat.

It's not a joke, man! The little bit of seat that was showing, there's no way we're putting down armrests! It's not going to happen!

And I walked up and I said, "Hey girls, I guess that's my seat." I said, "I hope you're okay with being close because we're going to be close the whole trip." And they all kind of like, "Oh my gosh!"

I said, "It's okay; I brought up Jesus right away." I said, "It's okay; I love Jesus; He loves me, and I love people; we'll be fine." I said, "I'm going to get in," and I literally had to push my way in and sit down.

I was warm the whole trip; I was cozy. I finally got so bold that I used their legs for my armrest. Lightly, gently, just the sides of their legs was where I propped my arms because there was nowhere to go! It's a four-and-a-half, almost five-hour flight!

I get to L.A.; I do my thing, preach, and have a blast. I'm at the airport to leave, and I get called on the loudspeaker. "Can you come to Dan, or can you come to the gate?" I said, "Man, they never call me to the gate! If they upgrade me, it just shows up on my phone."

I walked up; I said, "Ma’am, hey, I'm Dan," she said, "Sir, are you traveling alone?" I said, "I sure am!" She said, "We have a situation." I said, "You need my seat?" I said, "Just take it!"

I said, "Are you doing keeping a family together? A mom and their child? That's a no-brainer! Take my seat!"

She said, "Well, sir…" Now she's a gate agent; she deals with people every day—not happy people! People that go to church but not happy. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's right! Oh yeah, I'm being real; that's true!

They have rights, yeah, yeah—they go to church, most of them, but they ain't happy! She said, "Well, you didn't even ask what seat I have for you." I said, "Does it matter?"

She said, "I would think so." I said, "Honey, it doesn't matter at all! I pulled her in hook, line, and sinker; you'd have loved it!"

I was so serious. I said, "Honey, it doesn't matter at all. I said you don't understand, this happened to me once."

I said I was in the worst seat that I could ever be in, and somebody had the best seat, and they actually gave me their seat! She thinks I'm talking about flying!

Yeah, she says, "They did; they did!" And I said, "They did, and it forever changed my life! This is a no-brainer; I do this in a heartbeat!"

And I said, "Yeah, I had a terrible seat, and I was stuck in it; there was no chance of getting out of it, and he had an amazing seat, and there's no chance of me getting in it, and then he took mine!"

She said, "That's incredible that he would do that!" I said, "His name is Jesus!" She went— and it hit her; it hit her!

Because she's so sucked in, she's like— she's like when you're fishing, you don't have to hook; you're just real; she's on; you're like, "Whoa!" Hungry!

She's just— and I said, "I said Jesus!" She— it brought her to tears! Wow!

She said, "That's the most beautiful analogy I ever heard!" I said, "But you get it; why wouldn't I give my seat? It's not my seat, honey; it's not even my life!"

You see how free I am? That's what's wrong with me! You might not be able to relate to it, but that should be a conviction!

Yeah, because I read in my Bible that the gospel is good tidings of great joy! I'm not being mean; I don’t see great joy in the body of Christ. I see blank faces, stern faces, troubled faces, overwhelmed faces. I don't see great joy; and when somebody has great joy, it's always judged, when they're just looking for attention—nobody can really be that happy!

He's just doing His thing! Oh my goodness, one day we'll find out that it was all true and available! Make sure you're on that winning side!

Make sure you left a legacy and a heritage! Make sure when you're laying in that box and everybody's standing around, the pastor doesn't have to lie and say nice things! Oh yeah, I'm being real!

Because I won't lie; I've done some serious funerals, and I won't lie; I'll talk straight, and I'll cry and say let's use this and let's not believe the worst about so and so! I did one for a lady that was so mean in our church, and I had to talk about it at her funeral and risk offending her family.

'Cause we think we have to honor the dead with lies; I don't want to do it, and I talked plain until the family finally choked and burst out and cried, and I got a breakthrough!

So I took that seat, and that lady, I said, "So you see why it's easy for me to give my seat!" And she said, "That's beautiful, sir!"

I got a little word for her, and I said, "Hey!" and she went, "Oh my gosh!"

She's doing a job; there's people everywhere; it's an L.A. flight; it's packed! I said, "It's okay; I said, it's Jesus, honey! I said, give me your hand; we're going to pray."

Father, I just thank You—she said, "God bless you!" She's leaning over trying to hug me; we're hugging!

I went and sat in my new seat! I didn't have to go like this! So I gave my seat on the way, and I gave my seat on the way home!

So what? Somebody got blessed! Families got kept together! And if Jesus hung on a cross, I can give my seat! Come on!

Nothing's mine! When it's yours, you're in trouble! If it’s yours, you're in trouble; it's not even your life!

What's my life? No, it's His life in you! That's why suicide is so, so, so deceptive! You know how many people are tempted with suicide non-stop?

It's the first thing that comes on their mind when they're overwhelmed: "Just end it all; just end it all!" And people are getting tricked into taking what's not even theirs!

'Cause then they're cutting off purpose and destiny, and God was never your life; it was always designed to be His life in you! So let your light so shine!

So if you were the devil, what would you do? If you knew the word and you were the devil, you would say, "Okay, just let them go to church! I don't care! I'm not threatened that they go to church; I'll just make sure they never shine! Just keep them in animosity; just get them to go for all the wrong reasons!

I'll stir some stuff in their home; I'll look for every vulnerability; I'll roam like a roaring lion, seeking who I can devour, and I'll do a lot of damage, and we'll just give 40 years of church service, and they'll get thrown into Christ's response like the man that never went to church, and nothing will change!

If you were the devil, that's what you'd do. Make sure we aren't unaware of his devices, and make sure we give him no place.

Listen, I'm ending. You say finally? There's nothing I said today that you can't live if you really want to, that you can't give yourself to prayer to, and you can't get alone—when nobody's looking—and say, "Man, even if my family's living out of order, even if my spouse is mean, I don't have to be a product of that when Christ lives on the inside of me."

I don't need all my ducks in a row to have a healthy disposition; I just need to see why I'm here and why He's in me because the just shall live by faith.

I think we have more unbelief than we realize because we're so faced with stuff, and we put faith in everything we're faced with, and we don't believe it's possible to live what I'm preaching.

But I promise you, it is! I'm not excited because everything goes my way! I got a story probably like you do; some's probably worse; mine might be worse than some of yours. That's not the point!

I have the answer, so it doesn't matter what I've been through—through, it matters what He's been through! Amen!

'Cause I find myself in Him! Are you following me? Spouses, if you'll take me up on this and start waking up in the morning and talk to the Lord as soon as you wake up—"Good morning, Lord; thanks for another day! Man, I want to know You more! Would You have Your way in me?"

And man, I'm telling you—I feel like I've been a complainer! I've been waiting on my spouse; I've been hesitant on my job, wondering how—man, I'm done with that!

And I'm declaring my spouse doesn't owe me a thing today! I'm privileged just to be alive in You and to walk in love and lay down my life and serve and just watch how You move!

God, I'm done complaining at work! God, I just thank You for who You are! If you would start doing that every day, what would that do?

I told you I'm closing, but I turned you here; I got to read it; only let your conduct be worthy of the gospel of Christ! I'm not being mean. How many people wake up and even think about that?

How many people even think about the Lord when they wake up that go to church? I'm just being real! I pastored; I'm telling you I'm being real!

Only let your conduct be worthy of the price He paid—the gospel, Him giving His life so that whether I'm here and see you or I'm absent, I may hear of your affairs.

Watch that you stand fast—he's talking to you, church—that you stand fast in one spirit, in one mind.

Watch this: striving together for the faith of the gospel. That sounds pretty intentional and intense—striving together so that we all believe the same thing!

Can you stand up with me please? You will never mistake Him and me.

What's your name? Brad? What is it? Braden? That's different. Where'd you get that, man? Braden? Brad? Like Brad?

Yeah, yeah! I never met one before! Me neither! That just caught me; I was intrigued! Would you ever mistake Braden for me and me for Braden?

If I came to this church, would you walk up to me and say, "Hey, Braden?" Oh, sorry, you're Dan! I get you guys mixed up all the time! Would you ever do that? Not a chance!

Why? We don't look anything alike! But we can both look just like Him, and that's what makes us one! And that's why He's our Father, and we're the body of Christ, and together we're an army!

It has nothing to do with appearance; it has to do with nature; it has to do with expression; it has to do with you know them by their fruit, not their attendance.

That's right! Thanks! Make sense? Yes!

So we're going to strive together for the faith of the gospel. What is that? That every one of us start to understand who we are now that He came, and we make that the main goal!

The Bible says strive together! That sounds intentional! And make sure that we're all on page; that when we wake up tomorrow morning, everybody in this room is convicted to wake up for the same reason and begin at some level to start to pursue Him, to manifest Him!

And nobody owes me a thing! I'm going to walk in love; I'm going to walk in the light; I'm going to be a peacemaker 'cause blessed are the peacemakers, for they are the sons of God!

I'm going to be pure in heart 'cause they shall see God! You get it? Yeah!

It's going to be challenging! Brother, you don't know what my wife's like in the morning! I know what Jesus is like all the time!

And stop letting where your wife isn't become your excuse to not be Christlike! Stop letting her be Lord when Jesus is King! Are you with me?

So we're going to strive together for the faith of the gospel!

Oh my goodness! Oh, get this one! And not in any way—what way? Not in any way terrified by your adversaries!

See, when you're self-centered, you're terrified! When you're living for His great name, you're not afraid! You're never going to die anyway!

I read in Hebrews 2, He's the captain of our salvation that we're no longer bound to the fear of death, and He set us free! And we were held captive by it our whole life; I read that in Hebrews 2!

It is there; I read it! And yet we are scared half to death! And most of us are praying ‘cause we're freaked out—praying because we're despairing!

And most of us come to God 'cause we're afraid! And I just read we're not terrified in any way! Why?

Because we've denied ourselves! We're seeking first the kingdom of God and His righteousness! We've picked up our cross and we're following Him!

Yeah! What's picked up your cross? Never letting sin against you give the right to produce sin in you! Always overcome evil with good!

Never say, "Well, I only did this because they..." Stop! Our response—His response to our sin was dying on a cross!

He said, "Follow me!" Not sing to me! And that's not putting down the worship team because we're not singing. You’re all good!

So you got to decide today; I'm not having an altar call! You decide what you're going to do with your heart, your altar call is your heart before God! You live with you; you're the best accountability partner you'll ever have!

And nobody knows you like you! You know how you're thinking about me right now—you know how you're feeling and thinking about what I'm saying, and you know what's going on in you!

Make just choices! Don't let anything else matter more than what matters most, and be a product of Christ in your life! Amen!

Get into prayer like never before! Don't grow weary in well-doing, and stop taking account of suffer wrongs because love doesn't do that!

That's right! Are you all with me? And make sure if you say, "I love you," it's what you mean!

And I found that if you really love, you don't have to say it as much as we think because people will know you by your love.

Yeah! Father, I thank you for this house! I thank you for what You’re doing in our hearts!

I ask that You keep stirring the pot; stirring us! Give these men wisdom, and I ask, Lord God, that they would see the fruit of their labors and they would see the fruit of Your word in their lives!

God, I pray that this would be a house that's raised up by the Spirit, the glory, and the power of Almighty God!

I pray, Lord God, that You would establish a revelation of love in this house that would impact and sincerely really touch this community!

And I pray that no one would grow weary in well-doing and that there would be no casualties! Stir our hearts today to not just stay in the race but to run worthy of a prize!

I'm going to keep my eyes closed; I'm not looking around! If you're married, and your marriage hasn't been what I'm preaching, or you're convicted by what I'm saying, and you're not hearing it for your spouse—who knows, you can listen for somebody else, but you're actually listening for you!

I would encourage you right now, if your spouse is sitting there, just to find their hand and just grab their hand! If you're sincere about this and saying, "Man, I want to live this way, and I want to love my spouse this way!"

And you say, "Man, I haven't been, and there's been a little tension here, but I don't want that!" Send them a message right now and just get their hand and just squeeze their hand!

And don't pull your hand away, spouse! Let them squeeze your hand! Just be forgiving and loving, and that's that grace!

I've done this; I feel to do this right now! I've done this in so many settings, and I have people email me, tell me, come to me crying; they say the day you did that, our marriage changed!

We can't even explain it! We were so deep in counsel; we held each other's hands, squeezed, and we felt like we didn't have anything else to talk about! We just wanted to start over!

God has the ability to wipe things clean! We can forgive and move forward! We have the present and things to come! Don't miss that!

Let's get resolved or tomorrow is always yesterday! Grab their hand! If I kept my eyes closed the whole time, I haven't opened them! I'm not looking around who's doing this!

Just grab your spouse's hand and just hold their hand and squeeze it as if to say, "Hey honey, I want you to know I'm listening to this man, and I'm not listening for you; I'm listening for me! Please forgive me and would you give me the honor of growing in this truth because I want to love you this way?"

And the greatest thing you could do is just squeeze their hand back and say, "I'm in too!"

Father, I pray for every marriage; I pray for strong homes; I pray for blessed unions; I pray for no animosity and just hassle-free homes where we're growing up in a truth, and we are just saturated in the love of God!

Let selflessness reign in these marriages, and let healing be a given! In the name of Jesus, amen! Amen!

I'm finished, pastor.