Transcription
[Music]
I love the taste of dryer sheets. I'm doing this almost every hour on the hour. You're chewing on one now right before me. Wow, unbelievable. Sometimes I don't feel that I'm a good mom. There's no telling what I've done to myself. These carcinogens can cause anything from pancreatic cancer to lung cancer. Death is absolutely a possibility.
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My name is Jennifer, and I'm addicted to eating mattresses. I like my mattress plain and straight up. I know mayonnaise, butter, none of that. There's like a hard texture, like my taste buster though, and I kind of like a goodar. When I found out that G for eat mattresses, I was just blown away. I was like, oh, it blew my mind that she did.
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That every little detail, hold on. I make sure like when my mom's not going to be in her room, where I could be in her room. So like, let's say when she gets in the shower, I tiptoe in here to get it. The reason why I'm not eating my own mattress is because I ate my mattress.
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Already, I start off with the good stuff. The good stuff to me is the pillow top itself. Then I go down to this part, I cut it. After that, I just start ripping it as I go. I get to a piece, I'm done with mattresses when it smells funny. But if I get down to where it's just the springs, I usually, when I crave to eat some mattress, it usually be after 2:00. After I eat, I'm urg, I need to, I got to have it. Got to have it for some reason after sex, I would want some.
The side effects stuff, even mattresses, gas is really the only one you have.
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It enters my body and leaves my body. It goes through my system and goes out. I'm very concerned about her health and like her digestive system, 'cause I have seen it in the toilet. It comes out in whole pieces. It was all the sponge I was eating. I was like, it clogged up the toilet, like it's just sitting there. If I was that desperate to get it out, I could take it and wash it, do everything I did to it, and I could use it again if I wanted, if I was that desperate. Ain't that strange?
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I was sitting in the back seat, and it was like sponge down there, and I just picked it and took it and was like, just chewed on it. I've eaten couches, box springs, chairs, but for the last 10 years, mattresses have just been my thing. It's embarrassing. I couldn't just come out like, yo, I eat mattresses. Can't do that. It's not even all my family.
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Knows I fear that my sister could die from this. The mattress was good as in my throat. Sometimes it gets stuck, like I could choke, and I could die. God forbid that something will happen to her because I would feel at fault for that. Okay, it's bad for me, but I was eating when I was a kid, and I'm an adult. I'm still eating it, and I'm still here. It's already bad. I'm eating it. That's just like weird. So I mean, I'm strange, but not that strange.
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Okay, my name is Crystal. I have five beautiful children, and I have an odd habit of ingesting a household cleanser. I first started using the cleanser to clean with, and I would start smelling it. It would actually make my mouth water. The very first time that I tried it, immediately afterwards, I was totally freaked out, and I was really frightened.
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I like the texture, kind of grainy. Sometimes it's kind of like having sand in your mouth, and I like the taste. It doesn't make you high; it doesn't give you a kick. I'm not sure what it is, but it satisfies something in me.
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Maybe there is a correlation between feeling dirty inside, and maybe I did it because I felt like I needed to be clean. Is it something I've been trying to do to maybe destroy myself and not take responsibility for it? Like somebody that just takes a belt and hangs themselves. It's horrifying when I allow myself to think about it in terms like that.
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You know, you are one of the most important people in my life, and I have been eating this household cleanser. What? It's creepy, I know. Kind of blindsided me. Mom, I know, I'm sorry. I don't know what to say. The look on her face, it hurt my feelings because she looked frightened.
How often do you do it? Um, daily. For how long? Since I was 12. What is this doing to your insides? You don't ingest things like that. I think that I downplayed through the years maybe the harm that it could have done.
Sorry, I think a person you need to be apologizing to is yourself. Maybe I need to matter to me more than I do. I don't even know what I fully think of it yet. I mean, I'm scared for my mom's health. Did you ever read like the warning label?
Yes, I did, and it actually says that if you ingest it, to drink a glass of water and call your physician. Maybe harmful if swallowed or inhaled. Wash hands after handling and before eating, drinking, chewing gum, using tobacco, or using the toilet. They don't want this anywhere inside of you.
I'm sorry, I am, honey, and I love you so much. My name is Adele. I'm 30 years old. I'm from Brenon, Florida, and my addiction is eating couch cushions.
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My earliest memory of eating cushion, I was about 10 years old, and my cousin, we were in his room, and he's like, try this. On a daily basis, I probably eat about an 8 and 1/2 by 11 piece of cushion. I just take little bite-sized pieces and snack on it all day. Sometimes I'll just go on like a binge where I'll just keep going for like 20, 25 minutes straight of just eating cushion.
I love couch cushion. The way it sits in my mouth, it's soft, and it's a good taste. The darker cushion, the yellow cushion, that tastes better. It just has a stronger flavor. This is the damage that I've done so far. I have all this too, like all this is gone.
I do only eat cushion in private. I'll go in the bathroom, go in my room or something, and just eat.
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I couldn't control my parents. I couldn't stop them from splitting up, so there was just a lot that I couldn't control, and this was something that I could. Growing up, I would find pretty much anything with cushion. My mom had dresses with shoulder pads. I'd go to all her dresses and ate all her shoulder pads.
My mom found out about my addiction when I was about 16 years old. They ran some tests on her, and when they came back with the pathology report, she was completely obstructed. I couldn't believe it. A bowel obstruction is something that can be very serious. It could build up pressure, and the bowel can open up and spill the contents inside the body, lead to infection, and the person can die.
So now you're 30, and when you were 16, I tolerated it, and now it's time to put a stop to it. It's controlling me, you know? I can't say no. I can't stop.
So, well, that's like a drug. Mhm. Knowing that she's eating cushion all day makes me sick to my stomach. It took everything I had to keep from crying. If something was to go wrong, do you know what guilt I would feel?
That is why, like taking a loaded gun, I'm saying I know that you're going to pick it up and shoot yourself, and I'm not stopping you. I'm not very comfortable with telling people about my addiction to cushion. It really is out of control. I'm to the point where I don't feel good. I'm sick, and it makes me sick to eat it, but I'm still eating it.
Enough is enough. I'm done. You know, I want this to be over, and I want help.
I'll be there for you 24 hours a day, 1, 2, 3, 4:00 in the morning if you need to talk to me. You know where I am. I'll be there for you. As a mom, I'm so worried. I'm about ready to pack my stuff and move in with Adele. I don't want to lose her.
I'm Tempest. I'm 19 years old. I'm in college, and I'm addicted to eating laundry detergent and soap. Every morning, I do actually wake up and go right down to the laundry room. It's extremely embarrassing. I take my two fingers and I dab, and it looks like this. It tastes like sweet, salty, sour, bitter. So this will last me like 15 minutes, and now I want some more.
Growing up, I've always loved the smell of laundry detergent, and during the times I would be stressed, I would smell laundry detergent, and it tends to like calm me down.
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I feel like I'm supposed to eat laundry detergent because it feels so right. There are some serious dangers involved with eating soap or laundry detergent. Those could include things like causing ulcerations in the mouth, the esophagus, the stomach, the intestines.
I eat the soap when I wash my hands. I eat the soap when I take a shower. I even eat the soap sometimes like in my bed. When I think about the idea of the soap and detergent cleansing me, I basically mean I feel refreshed. And so if I feel refreshed on the outside, why not feel refreshed on the inside?
My name is Jillian. I'm 33 years old, and I'm addicted to smelling pine cleaner. Pine cleaner is my Holy Grail. If I could douse my soul in pine cleaner, I would. The first thing I do when I wake up, I smell my pine cleaner, and then I'll make coffee, and I will smell pine cleaner.
I will use it as laundry detergent. I will pour it into a pot on my stove heater so that it permeates the whole house. I will use it as an air freshener too. When I leave the house, I will take a little spray bottle in my purse. I will also put it on a bandana to keep in my pocket.
For as long as she can remember, Jillian has always loved the smell of pine cleaner, but two years ago, her love affair turned into a full-blown addiction after a stressful divorce. The pine cleaner absolutely did give me solace. It was like kind of a soft calm spot amidst all the chaos.
Now she is so dependent on the smell, she needs a fix every 15 minutes and can't function without the scent. It's a very strong vapor, kind of like if you took a pine tree and you dipped it in a vat of bleach.
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I have pine cleaner added to like a soft squirt bottle. It concentrates the aromas and the vapors and directs the spray directly into my nose or my mouth. I also use a surgical mask with the pine cleaner on it at home and just strap it to my face.
But my favorite way to smell pine cleaner is to have a bottle that has maybe an inch or two left at the bottom. The harder I crunch the bottle, the harder the scent is being forced into my nose. I almost feel like it's burning the inside of my sinus cavities and my nasal passages, but I couldn't imagine a happy life without it.
But Jillian isn't the only one who constantly smells pine cleaner. Her ex-husband and current roommate is also subjected to the scent. The smell really gets to me. It hurts my nose sometimes. It'll give me a headache.
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I have asthma, and sometimes I do have shortness of breath. I'll wake up with that cinder block on my chest feeling. Recently, Jillian's addiction has started to escalate. It's not just quick sniffs anymore; it's sessions. I will rhythmically crunch the bottle and go into a trance-like state. It's scary behavior to witness.
I try to tell her to stop, and she's just kind of ignorant to it and believes that it's not doing her any harm at all. It's been a part of me for so long. It's not something that I can ever foresee wanting out of my life.
My name is Nicole. I'm 19 years old. I live in New York City, and I'm addicted to eating deodorant. My life revolves around eating deodorant. When I wake up in the morning, I want deodorant. After each meal, I want deodorant. When I'm stressed out, I eat deodorant. In the middle of the night, I wake up out of my sleep. I want deodorant.
Nicole first had the urge to taste deodorant when she was just 4 years old, but 2 years ago, her occasional cravings turned into a full-blown addiction. Now she eats a half a stick of deodorant every day. It's really soft. It feels like it melts in my mouth. It has its own unique taste. My mouth gets really dry, but at the same time, my mouth is still watering because it's what I'm craving.
I take deodorant with me everywhere I go because I never know when I'm going to crave it. I'm not going to be able to get through the day without having my deodorant. The first time I saw Nicole eat deodorant, she bit a chunk out of it. I was just shocked, like I don't believe you're eating deodorant.
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I'll take the cap and I'll like scoop it like it's a spoon, and I chew it, swallow it. I do like specific brands of deodorant. The ones that I buy are richer and taste better. But deodorant sticks aren't the only way Nicole satisfies her addiction. I like to spray better because the residue doesn't get stuck on my teeth, and it absorbs into my mouth really fast.
The first time I did it, it made my tongue really numb for like a couple of hours, but I just love the taste. Nicole's so hooked, she needs deodorant with her 24/7. When I realize that I'm out of deodorant, I start to panic. My anxiety goes crazy, like my heart would beat really fast. I get very, very aggravated. I just need it, and without it, I will be a totally different person.
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I'm worried about Nicole's health. There are chemicals in it that's not supposed to be ingested. My hope is to get her help, that she could stop completely. I have tried quitting before. I tried for a week, and it just was a disaster. I would get headaches. I would get really cranky. It just made me want the deodorant more.
I am scared for my life because it makes my stomach hurt really bad, or I'll throw up, but I keep eating more and more and more. I really do want to stop, but I just can't.
My name is Chissa. I'm 35 years old. I live in Dallas, Texas, and I'm addicted to eating dryer sheets. Most people use dryer sheets in their laundry. Me, on the other hand, I love the taste of dryer sheets.
Charmiss's addiction to chewing dryer sheets began 4 years ago. She was initially tempted by the clean laundry scent, and it smells so good. It's a shame she even hung dryer sheets in front of her vents to make her home smell fresh. Then she had the strange urge to taste them. Now she can't stop.
It's ridiculous how much I want to do it. I'm doing this almost every hour on the hour. That's crazy. I just look to the dryer sheet for stress relief. If I'm ticked off, if I'm stressed out, this is what calms my nerves.
The taste of a dryer sheet is pretty much the way it smells. It's not sweet at all, of course, but it's kind of spicy and tangy at the same time. The taste is so intense. Chissa wraps the dryer sheets in tissue to tolerate the chemicals. Despite this, she can't put them down.
I am at my work now. If I don't have it, it's like I have withdrawal, literally. Well, I remember the first time that I saw her chewing the dryer sheets, and she just pulled it out of her bra like that. That's not normal.
I've always been a busty girl. It's just been a convenient place for me to place things, my bank card, my phone. So what's more convenient than placing my dryer sheet sandwich in my bosom?
Charmiss learned this deadly addiction from her mother growing up. You know, I used to watch my mother chew on tissue, tow on paper towels, and I didn't see anyone doing the dryer sheets. I don't, I can't tell you where I got that from. That was my own doing.
I'm really worried about her kids. You can tell kids all day not to do and not to do and not to do. The fact of the matter is kids are going to do what they see.
No, Gabby, you know, spit it out, spit it out, Gabby, spit it out. Your phone is [Music] ringing. My biggest worry is how it's going to affect her body. Is it going to make her sick? Is it a slow death? This is literally a poison that I'm putting into my body.
As much as I want to quit, the struggle is that I can't stop. There's no telling what I've done to myself.