Transcription
Do you ever find yourself stuck on the couch, just scrolling through social media, feeling like the most lazy person in the world? Yeah, that’s not laziness. [Music]
Hi there, my name is Megan, and welcome to Neurodivergent Magic, the YouTube channel for your neurodivergent content, with brand new videos coming at you every Tuesday. Today, we’re going to talk all about the difference between executive dysfunction and laziness, because they are absolutely not the same thing.
First, let’s talk about laziness. So, if you ask me, laziness doesn’t exist. And I actually made a really great video about that, so you can check that out here. Or, if you’re more into books, I highly recommend the book *Laziness Does Not Exist* by Dr. Devon Price, which I will go ahead and link to below. But here’s the long and the short of it: basically, I don’t think laziness exists. I think when you’re feeling lazy, one of three things is happening: either you’re experiencing executive dysfunction, which we will get to in a minute; you’re experiencing mental resistance; or you’re merely taking care of yourself. So mental resistance is basically your brain trying to keep you stuck in the same patterns because it knows that those patterns are safe, whereas doing anything different does not feel safe to your brain. And taking care of yourself is pretty self-explanatory; sometimes we don’t do things simply because we are out of energy for that thing today.
So let’s say you’re not totally sold on this, and you still think that laziness is probably a real thing, and you’re probably the laziest person who’s ever existed, and I simply don’t understand how horrible and lazy you truly are. Hint: none of that is true. But let’s just say maybe it is; I can still prove that that feeling when you’re scrolling through social media on the couch is not laziness.
If laziness existed, here’s how I would define it: it would have three core characteristics. Number one: there’s something that needs done. Number two: you don’t want to do it. And number three: you don’t do it, and you don’t feel much anxiety about it. Seem like a pretty fair definition?
Now let’s go ahead and define executive dysfunction. Executive dysfunction is a whole different ball game. Here’s what we know about executive dysfunction: there are also three things we can say about executive dysfunction. There’s a thing you have to do; you very much want to do it; and you feel a ton of anxiety when you can’t do it. You see how these are completely different?
So you might be thinking, “Okay, Megan, back it up. What is this executive dysfunction thing that you’re talking about?” Executive dysfunction is when you want to do something, you are actively trying to do something, and because of a chemical misfiring in your brain, you cannot do the thing.
Now I can already hear the wheels turning in your head saying, “No, no, that’s not possible; that’s laziness; that’s what laziness is.” But I’m telling you that it’s not. If laziness exists, then it’s when you don’t want to do the thing, you’re not trying to do the thing, and you don’t really care if the thing gets done. Isn’t that kind of the polar opposite of what you’re experiencing when you feel trapped on the couch scrolling through social media, even though you’re not even enjoying it? You desperately wish that you could get up, but you just can’t. Doesn’t that sound like the complete opposite of laziness? That’s because it is. When you’re experiencing executive dysfunction, your brain is working very, very hard to try to make something happen; you’re not being lazy at all.
So now you’re probably thinking, “Okay, what am I supposed to do about this executive dysfunction? Because whether or not it’s laziness, the result is the same: I’m not getting anything done, and I feel like garbage about it.”
I know it’s frustrating to hear, but the best way to cope with executive dysfunction is with some self-compassion. Give yourself forgiveness for not being able to do everything that you want to be able to do. Remind yourself that you are simply human, and humans are not machines. Our best does not look the same day after day; our best is going to fluctuate. To be honest, self-compassion is really important for your general mental health, but let me tell you a secret: it’s really good for your productivity too. Because here’s the thing: sitting there on the couch scrolling through social media doesn’t take that much energy, but sitting there on the couch scrolling through social media hating yourself takes a lot of energy, which makes it even less likely that you’re going to be able to get up and start doing the thing that you need to do. What you have to learn to do is to wrangle all of that self-hatred, feel it, and then let it go. Remind yourself that it is not serving you, and therefore you do not have to hold it. Once you’re able to let go of that self-hatred, all of a sudden your brain’s going to have a lot of spare brain power, and you might even be able to get the thing done that you’ve been struggling with.
Executive dysfunction is not laziness, and you are not bad for struggling.
As always, thank you so much for watching. Make sure you subscribe so you don’t miss any future videos, and I will see you next time. [Music]