Ignorant Wife Faces Financial Infidelity | Financial Audit

We're pay advancing. Do you know he's pay advancing? I don't know what that is. He's getting his paycheck, parts of his paycheck early, and then having to pay it back. Yeah, she doesn't even know that. No.

I'm Natalie, I'm 22, and I'm Christian. I'm 23. From Willis, Texas, and this is Financial Audit. Well, thanks for coming over, guys. So, what do you currently do for a living? I'm a stay-at-home mom. Got two kids. Right. What are the ages? Uh, you guys are so young. This is insane. Is this the 50s? No. I mean, I'm all about it. I'm just like, I can't even picture a little stinky, uh, sticky thing running around. And I'm 29. Kill me. Okay, so we've got two under two. Um, kill me. It's not for the faint of heart, I will tell you that. Um, my oldest, you look like you're in high school. This is insane. Okay, sorry, sorry. This is blowing my mind. I'm just getting old. I'm getting old. It's fine. Um, my oldest is two and a half. He was born in September. And then my youngest is 14 months old, born on December. Yeah. So, being a stay-at-home mom makes sense. What do we got going on over here? Yeah, I'm a restaurant manager. I, um, in The Woodlands, Texas. I just recently got a promotion. It's going to be like a multi-unit type of thing. Oh, that's cool. What's our current household income? It's about, uh, $5,200, $5,500 a month. Net or gross? Net. 50, 52 to 54, you said? Yeah. What's it going to be? I already got the raise. Oh, okay. I'll be honest, I mean, for a two-person household in a not-cheap area with two little kids, it's not the most like beefy salary. But we are young also at the same time. So, we can't. I'm not going to knock $53,000 net at 23. Not even close. So, I mean, that is cool within itself. And childcare is very expensive. So, it's hard to do that. What, what scares me? Okay, we're young. We're a young couple. We got kids. Cool. Awesome. So, we take out a HELOC, and then we continue to borrow money. Is this the way we're starting off marriage? Is this the way we're starting off building a family? What the, are we possibly doing? So, I was in insurance for a while, and, uh, you'll see some of the deposits from that. And I was like, buying insurance leads and basically living on a credit card when I turned 18 years old. Chase gave me a $1,000 credit limit. Okay. But then it's your choice to max it up. I, I know. But yeah, I know. At 18, it's hard. I opened a credit card. I opened a couple credit cards at that time. I was dumb, dumb. And I paid it off. Um, but that did not answer my question about HELOC and continuing to borrow more money. That's not starting raising a family off in a financially good position. What are we doing? I, I feel like I'm in a situation where I can't save my way out of my expenses. Save your way out of expenses? You mean earn your way out of expenses? No, like, I, either way, like, you want to save enough money. I feel like, I guess the reason I keep spending is because I feel like no matter how much I save, my expenses will be more than my income. But your expenses were all like, yeah, you say that like I don't have the numbers right in front of me. No, no, I know. What are we doing? Yeah, I feel like, I feel like that's why we spend. But, but yeah, why? That's why we spend. Why? What's why we spend? No, I know, I know that's a bad mentality. But that's just, he has a problem telling me no. And what are you? The spender? And he's the decider? And he says no? And you say, well, no. No, I'm the, I'm the spender. I'll ask for things. He won't tell me no, even if we don't have the money for it. And so, it's gotten to the point where I have to really push and say, do we actually have the money for this? And he'll, what do you mean? Do you guys not sit down and talk about your money? No. No. Okay. Okay. Well, let's have this marriage like, exist longer than a few years. And a good way to do that is sit down and actually understand where our financial picture is, right? I say that as someone who's never been married. But at least I understand the finances around it. Yeah. Why, why have we not sat down and talked about this about money in any way whatsoever? I feel like my responsibility as a man is to make sure that I'm living below my means, which I'm not. That's a responsibility as an adult about you being a, having to provide, to provide for her. Yeah. So, that's why, that's why it's hard for me to tell them. Is that where you guys are mentally? No, I think he feels guilty about not giving me things that I would like, if that makes sense. Like, he, I'm at home with kids. You pressure him into getting things? No. Does she pressure you into getting things? She says that we're broke a lot, which makes me feel bad. Then why do you get the things if you're the, the spender? If you specifically say, hey, we're broke, then why do we go spend money? As the spender, I will say, I'm also the spender. Okay. Then what? That mean you just, I'm death by a thousand paper cuts. And she's like, so you do the big purchase. He does lots of small purchases. Yeah. Okay. Yeah, I'll, I'll give him that. He does get like the, what are you getting? What's your thing? Clothes. Yeah. Yeah.

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What, just a bunch of new clothes all the time? All the time. Yeah. So that the one-year-old can see a new outfit. I mean, you have a point, cuz I don't leave my house. Exactly. That's what I was kidding at. Okay, HELOC. Why do we take out a HELOC? Because my minimum monthly credit card payments were like $600 a month, and it was either, it was, it was either not pay them or take out a HELOC. I couldn't afford it. Early. Yeah. I would agree with that. Yeah. Was it a, not an, the first one wasn't. We actually planned him. The second. Yeah. Mhm. So, I, I feel like we were really good with our finances. We bought a house at 18. Uh, what you said at 18, you got a massive credit card limit and maxed it out. That was like a year or so later. I'm just saying, they gave me that credit card limit when I was 18. Okay. Okay. So, I feel like, I feel like we were more financially responsible when I had a job. And then I went $99 in insurance. And just, and he just really, yeah, he didn't really work when he was in insurance. Cuz he was working from home. But then we had just had our first son, and I guess he felt guilty about leaving me at home with him, even though I was like, kind of okay. And so he would just not stay home. Or if he would hear him like fussing and stuff, he would just come downstairs and like, help out and everything instead of going to sell insurance. H. Okay, so you took it out to pay off the credit card debt, to be clear? Correct. Okay. Any more kids? No, not yet. Not right, right now. Okay. But, but, okay, so, okay, as long as, as long as that's not in your media, I'm just trying to determine because we are not starting this family off in a financially secure way. And then our spending's just ridiculous. I mean, to be clear, I mean, spoiler alert, spoiler alert, alert. We, woo, we, woo. Total income that came in, and this includes some extra stuff that came from your insurance days, I guess, some re-re. Yeah, I still get, I, I get paid every month from it. Yeah. So, if we're bringing in $5,161 in total, $663.55 going out is, uh, insane. Yeah. So, we went to Oklahoma, I think during that statement for a cousin's wedding, and we just kind of went crazy. I will say, if it, we didn't have to go to Oklahoma, I would not have wanted to go to Oklahoma. So, not my prefer. But we like, pity, kind of a vacation. So, yeah. But, but, but, but we have debt to pay off, right? We have kids to take care of. M. Right? So, you vacation? What vacation? Why? What kind of responsibility is that? You guys are young, but you've taken out a lot. Now it's time that we were growing up. Yeah, I guess it was just like, we had to go to Oklahoma. We were like, if we're going to be there, we might as well, yeah, go to Oklahoma. Cost two cents to exist in Oklahoma. Over exaggeration. Calm down. And it, but you did not have to go crazy. Dude, not even close. Yeah, but we did. I know you did. But what makes me afraid is doing it again. Yeah. Yeah. And if we don't understand that it's completely bat wrong, when we're out of, when we're in terrible, destructive, absolutely terrible debt, how do we know we're not going to do this again? That scares the me too. All right. Not giving me a, I guess that's kind of confidence here. I guess that's kind of why we're here is just to, since we don't create a budget, we just kind of like, don't look at it and spend. Yeah. Well, we're going to put you through the budgeting program like any other couple. So, make sure you take that, take the education, build the budget. But all the actions that have led up, starting at 18 from you, now five years later, later, what, how's your finances been since you graduated high school towards now? Okay, so we basically, we met when I was 17, he was about to turn 18. High school sweethearts? No, he was homeschooled. Yeah. So, no, we met at his sister's wedding. Sure. Yeah. Um, so basically, he, I didn't know any, anything about finances, cuz they don't teach you that in school, which they should. Um, and so he was the one that was really doing everything, and I was just kind of working. He was helping me figure it out. Got me a credit card to build up my credit. Yeah. Then we, did you teach us the fundamentals of credit cards? I don't think so, because you were your own credit cards. Okay. So, cool. Yeah. What were you doing? I did buy her a car in cash, though. Okay. Mhm. Yeah, we didn't take a loan. So, that's good. Yeah. Okay, cool. High five. That, that doesn't negate any of the stuff here. That's not how this works. Um, okay, this is insane. This is ridiculous. Let's, let's, let's just start. Dive. Actually, before we dive in, give me a financial score. I'm going to say, three, two, one, go. On go. I want you to both give me your household financial score, zero to 10. Zero being the worst, 10 being the best. So, three, two, one, go. And then you say it. Three, two, one, go. Zero. Oh, what the. That is a big difference. By 50% of the scale. Yeah, she's just not involved in our finances. Okay, well, that's an immediately, that's an immediate red flag. You guys got to do this together. Even if you're not out there earning, I mean, at some point, you probably will again. It will be many years down the road, and maybe not. Doesn't have to be a requirement, but just typically, that's what we see these days. Um, and still, you guys need to come together, understand where we're trying to get to, what goals are we trying to achieve, what does it take to hit those goals? Along the way, those are conversations we need to have together. If one person's dominating the household finances, that's, that's a recipe for disaster looking forward. Cuz at some point, you're going to want to be more involved in the conversations. And if you're jumping into the deep end of an absolute mess and confusion, and you don't know how to work with someone at that point, because you've just been doing it so long together, it's going to be a mess. I think that's part of the reason why I don't bother with it, is because it is so like, overwhelming. Her? You're burdening her by up the finances, and she's having to deal without, without knowing what's going on. True. That's a burden. Not burdening someone by giving them. Well, you can burden someone by giving. Well, I did tell her that we're, we go more into debt every month. You guys want your Hammer Financial score, though? It's, uh, linked in the description below. It's free. Uh, but speaking of, yeah, going into debt every single month. We're pay advancing. We're pay advancing. Do you know he's pay advancing? I don't know what that is. He's getting his paycheck, parts of his paycheck early, and then having to pay it back. Yeah, she doesn't even know that. No. No, you've never told me that. Never. What do you think? Cuz that's like scary. Like, what are you doing that for? For bills that come up. What bills? Cuz our bills come out the first of every month. Not all of them. The ones you've told me no. Not all of our bills come out the first of the month. But so, here, here's what happened. I, are those in February? I, I accidentally paid my car this month. I accidentally paid my car payment twice. Okay. But that doesn't account for everything here. You pay advance constantly. Well, yeah, but it's, it's one of those things you get into. Once you pay advance once, then you just need it the next time around, and the next time around. Not necessarily, though, because these are like close to $400. Okay, that's not an insignificant amount of money. But $400? It's $100. Okay. But when you pay it back, you, when you do the reset. Okay. I see what's happening. Is doing $100 at a time? Yes. Okay. Well, that makes, that makes what I was about to say even easier. It's $100. Yes. For many people, you get into that, and that's a hard cycle to break. $100 is not even close to a make-or-break for someone who's bringing in net $53,000 a year. Yeah. What is going on, man? Got to give me something here. I got to get some kind of insight. So, I guess I finally decided to like, close our credit cards or lock them or whatever, however that works. And I was just like, starting off in my checking account with like nothing. Um, cuz kind of the way like my mindset worked was, and I feel like I learned this just throughout my childhood, except for my parents made a lot more money than me. Uh, they would, now, they would put like everything on a credit card and pay it off. So, I would just put everything on a credit card, not knowing how much I actually spent on it. And then I go to pay it off at the end of the month, and then I can, I don't know. I, I, I mean, I know how to manage P&Ls and stuff. I'm pretty good at that. But I just never dealt with my own. How do you feel? How do you feel you're get, you're hearing things for the first time a lot? I need to know how you feel. How is, is the status of your guys' marriage right now, mostly revolving around the finances? But where are we sitting today? I mean, it's concerning that I didn't know that he was taking out part of his paychecks early. Um, I've definitely feel like that's something I should have at least known. Yes, he doesn't really involve me in the finances, but I feel like I should have at least known that on, if he was taking out parts of his paycheck before getting paid. Don't you think you should have told her? Yeah. Why didn't you? I don't know. I honestly just, I don't know the answer for everything. No, no. I didn't, I didn't think about it. Come on. I didn't. But like, you didn't think. I've not included her in our finances since we got married. So, I just didn't think about it. Have you ever asked to be included in the finances? No. Why? It's just really confusing for me. Stressful. Yeah. And I, well, it's clearly going to get more stressful if we don't ever. Yeah. Okay. So, yep. We're borrowing that, and then we have the fees on top of that. He loses, he loses four bucks every time. So, that's a 4%? 4% immediately gone from the money that is borrowing from his paycheck. Yeah. All right. And then on here, so here's a, so we have a paid-for car. You said you got a paid-for car for her, but yourself? No, no. I, I bought my car in cash. But the, so that car ended up going out. First off, it was a coupe, and we had two kids, which was, I have been begging him to get rid of that car for a really long time. Yeah. Why don't you get a car within what makes sense of your finances? Because we had, we had no cash when my car died. No, that doesn't answer the question. You have no cash. How does that equal get a more expensive car than you can afford? Usually, that would mean getting a car within your budget. Huh? I mean, I, I didn't have any cash. So, so how does that equal getting a car you cannot afford? That doesn't make sense. I don't have any cash. That means I get a car I can't afford instead of a car that's within my budget. Buddy, you got to give me something. What am I working with? Okay, so, I mean, it's, it's hard to drive around a small, cheap car when you have two kids and a car seat, two car seats. Yeah. But I think you went a little overboard for what you needed. You could have got a Jeep Cherokee, like my Jeep Cherokee, for about $12,000. 2019 Jeep Cherokee. That's what it's worth about. And you can easily fit them in there. It's safe. I think where he was coming from is, we know we're eventually going to have more kids. Well, that's why I asked that at the beginning. You guys said no. No, we said yes. Not yes, but not like right, right now. When, when, probably in the next year and a half. No, it doesn't make sense. Why not clean up your finances first? Kids aren't cheap. You can still have them while you're getting out of debt. Yes. And while you're building wealth. Sure. Absolutely. But a lot of your think, I don't know, because you're delaying a lot of things that set you guys up for success, which pushes a lot of the pressure on them. At some point, yeah. I want you guys to be in a better place before we start bringing in, before we start popping out more. I, I think one more planned. One more planned. I'm getting snipped after. Okay. So, I, I think, I think my justification for that was, it's a, it's a good reliable car. What is it? It's a Toyota Sienna. And even still, that, what you just said didn't make any sense because my Jeep likely holds. You can't put a third car seat in the middle. No, no, you're not supposed to. We tried. Oh, well, that's me. That's, that's on my lack of knowledge. Maybe if you get like some of the more expensive car seats, has a third row. Yeah, it's an eight, eight people. Okay. Yeah. I don't know what I'm talking about when it comes to car seats. Car seats, it's not my field. Of care giving, anyway, whatsoever. That's okay. To size for $2,281.28 at an interest rate of what? It's 8.9. Not great. 9%. Minimum monthly payment, uh, $549.50. Because it had over 100,000 miles. The banks will only do 48 months. What is your, what do you mean? Banks will only do. That's the longest they'll go. Yeah. Why would I want you to go longer than that? That's terrible. No, no, I'm just saying that's why the payment's high. Payment's high cuz you probably got something that you just couldn't afford right now. Well, your paid-off car. What kind of car is it? No, that's her car now. I took over her Toyota Corolla. Okay. So, you're never going to drive around the kids? Well, no, he is. See, it doesn't make sense. Okay. So, sure, I had the lack of knowledge in terms of where you have to put a car seat, and that's, you know, fine. Okay. That's awesome. You're preparing when you got this for this new kid. That just, again, we've already established, and you guys kind of agreed that maybe you had kids a little too early. Mhm. Yeah. Uh, does that flow in with having another one right now? Now, maybe you're just trying to keep the ages like less. Get so, I mean, there's a family planning perspective, and then there's the financial perspective, and it's hard to mesh. What were you going to say? I mean, I could probably only go through having one more kid. I almost died with my last one. Oh my gosh. Yeah, it was a whole, whole ordeal. I would not recommend almost dying. It was not fun. Yeah. You want to almost die again? No. Which is why I want to wait a little longer. If I, even want said a year. Well, yeah, you guys are not decided on this. No, it's more like, why do we buy the car for it then instead of waiting until getting the car then? That's cuz that's all I was going to suggest is this was not necessary right now. Right, right now. You could have gotten a car that was about $10,000 cheaper that would fit your situation now and then figure it out financially at that point. Yeah. Get a credit score better. Get a better loan. That's the clean up finances. Having a fully funded emergency fund. Would you want to have a kid without a fully funded emergency fund anyway? Like, I mean, no. I mean, I know you're already in the situation you're in, but without having a fully funded emergency fund, our situations just so dangerous financially speaking as a household. Yeah, I think also the reason that interest rate is so high is cuz my credit score when I took that out, cuz my credit cards were at 110% utilized. Yeah, it was 580. When I, does this make sense to have done this at that point? I would say no. 12%? 12% interest on what? $32,000? Uh, that's a credit limit. Oh, my thing. No, that's, it's maxed out. Oh, me. What are we, what are we doing? Why? What did you do? You know this is maxed out. You know he has a maxed out card at 12%. It's a lock. Oh, this is the HELOC. There it is. Yep. The HELOC. When, okay, I need an, when he went and did the HELOC, were you consulted in any way whatsoever? Yeah, and I agreed with it. Okay. Did you understand it? I did. He explained it. Okay. It was that or just not pay our credit cards. But you said the minimum of the payment was like $500 bucks a month, right? It was on, on one card. Oh, altogether, what was it? It was like, it was like $900 bucks a month. How much were you making in your previous position? My household income went up about like $500 bucks a month. So, what do you mean? Now, last time. Yeah, I mean, depending on your living expenses, you could have made it work. You could have also done, I mean, I think the fact that I only work 40 hours a week. Yeah. Um, any consolidation? Did you look into any kind of consolidation? Yeah, but my credit cards were like 110% utilized, so I couldn't get anything. And the only reason I got that is cuz it's a credit union. So, $3,32,4153. Yeah. 12%. The minimum monthly payment of $330.41. Yeah. It's interest only for five years. Part of the reason it's so high is because we also had a second lien on our house because the, are you kidding me? So, we were in a program that paid for our down payment for our house. So, we closed in our house for $20, and they forgave it. Like, that means 20% a year. Well, that's okay. So, we had to pay off $6,000 for the second. I think you guys have rushed into something. Yeah. Trying to be a little older than you are right now. Sure. At some point, it would have made sense in the history of the United States and the prices of homes for someone in your age range to have bought a house immediately. Like, oh, we're going to go pump out some kids and just go get a house for a, you know, box of donuts. That's like, that's not. I think you guys are rushed into the wants of this life, this dream life that we've envisioned. We've just gotten ourselves into a risky situation in general. Um, I forget that we're so young. Yeah. Yeah. I don't think about the fact that I'm 22. Yeah. You guys have baby face. So, hold onto it. But you have it. It gets sad real quick. Does it? Freedom. Just wear sunscreen every day. I've heard that. Okay. $2,446. You're not close to maxing out this one. No interest. Is this in an interest-free period, or do you pay this off every month? Purchased 37. It was paid off before that month. It's not anymore. No. Why? Why'd you do this? We had $1,500 in car repairs. Well, your spending is also ridiculous. Yeah. Starbucks and two car repairs on what? The Corolla. The 2009 Corolla. It was $1,557, and I had to do it because it was the E, part of it was the EVAP system, so it couldn't pass inspection. $40 minimum payment. Inspection, uh, isn't something we have to do in Texas anymore. What do you mean? I don't know if that's been officially been applied yet, but you no longer have to get an inspection to get registered. Really? Yeah, they passed that law. I don't know if it's effective yet. Is that smart? Don't let me spread misinformation. Well, from it blew my mind when I moved down here in Texas that the inspections are even a thing, because that's not a thing in Michigan. Oh, Michigan. Yeah, you didn't have to do that up in there. You just got your car registered. Hm. Me, it's because of a car repair. The pink lines are all bull. The pink lines are all, the pink lines are all two pages of this. Do you even know you're spending? You guys don't go over it? Do you even know what's happening at this household? Wendy's, Amazon, Wendy's, Juice Bar, which by the way, supposed to be giving you money, not you giving them money. Panera Bread, liquor, Raising Cane's, Sonic, Life Cafe, Juice Bar, Raising Cane's. Just, just make a juice. Just make a juice. They won't know. No, no, don't, don't steal from the company. Raising Cane's. I, I do get them for free, but there's like some bottled stuff that I don't. Stop. So, I get like the acai bowls and juice for free. Stop. Then stop. Then stop spending money. I know. What doesn't make any sense. Disney Store, Taquito, Taquito, McDonald's. What is this Black Rock thing? Coffee. That's me. Great coffee. Panda Express, Juice Bar, Juice Bar. Once Upon a Child, Hello Wisp, Koopa, Yo. Starbucks, Taquito, McDonald's, Taquito, Amazon, Marshalls, Black Rock Coffee, Waterburger, Black Rock Coffee, Taquito, Taquito, Taquito, Waterburger, Pizza, Netflix. So many. Thrift. It's the gas station. He says. Oh, so I take it you're the watcher of the show? You're not. Yeah, I watch in passing. Oh, and passing. So, too, essentially, stopping at a gas station and just getting some. Okay. Yeah, we, we eat a lot of chips. Okay. Go to the grocery store. I'm talking about get massive bags for much cheaper. You stop at the gas station for chips? Yeah, for chips. Never heard of people doing this. Who stops at gas for chips? Go get a big bag in the grocery store. He comes home every day from work with beer and chips from the gas station. No, I wouldn't say every day, but like, you're going to get fat when that metabolism dies. 30, 23 years old. That's what happened to me. The Doritos are just so good. And they don't have. Met HB. So, they don't have Doritos at HB. Not the ones that I. Well, which, which ones do you get? The, the fire line ones. Go to Walmart or something. Okay. I will say a lot of those food and spending is him. He gets food, fast food quite a lot. The only things on there that are mine is Black Rock, the kid stuff, and then Marshalls. Prom store, Taquitos, Chick-fil-A, Double Shot Coffee, Double Shot Coffee, Qdoba, McDonald's, Prom store, Taquito, Prom store, La Drain, Baking, more baking. That's from, we're in Oklahoma. Yeah. That Rising Grind. Your spending habits didn't change whether you're in Oklahoma or not. It wasn't like a unique situation. You're just spending going crazy. Rising Grind, Prom store, Tequila, and baking again. Taquito, Taquito, Starbucks, Taquito, and Carl's Jr. The spending's wild. You said you have a new balance on the Freedom Card, right? Yeah. Oh, oh, right there. This is the one that I was using. Yes. Okay. So, written on this one is like New Balance G. So, that's the same thing. Okay. No need for that one. And then on the Apple Card, $839.18. The minimum monthly pay, $28. Oh, shocker. Most of the things on here are bull. In fact, there was only one thing that wasn't. And actually, it probably, you know, in fact, it definitely was, cuz it was only five bucks. So, I know you stopped and got some chips. Where was it? Yeah. And I will say also, he has told told me that we can't afford things and we can't afford to eat out. And I'll cook at home for myself and the kids. And then he'll get off of work and he'll say, hey, I'm so hungry, I'm going to stop and get food. I'll tell him we can't afford that, and he'll still stop. What are you doing? Why? I don't know. That is not an answer. I, I, I don't, if you can't get to the core of why you're doing it, you ever going to change? I feel like it's cuz I work, you know, for like eight, whatever, however many hours. And then I just, eight hours a day. No, I know. No, I know. Oh, it's, it's so hard. I know. What, well, I'm just saying it's like one of those things where I don't take any breaks at work, so I just get off and I'm so hungry. So, oh, buddy, has a job. Yeah. Little job where he has to do work. And to be fair, also, he could get a free acai bowl. Yeah. Instead of going to a fast food restaurant. Yeah. True. And metabolism, man. When it dies in a couple years, have your husband's going to be a fat. Watch out. I hope not. DoorDash, Chipotle, Starbucks, Chipotle, Starbucks, Starbucks. So, who's the Starbucks? Her. It's right next door to my work. And congratulations. Make coffee like a human adult. Nectar Juice Bar, and then some Taquito and Taquito. Juice Bar. DoorDash, DoorDash. Crust. I thought, see, I thought we were at least picking up food on the way home, but we're getting DoorDash. Crust Pizza, Taquito, Starbucks, Starbucks, Starbucks, DoorDash, DoorDash, Starbucks. And also, DoorDash is him. That I draw the line there. Are you? I will get DoorDash like once or twice a month. He, I will go to bed and lay down, and I'll come out in the morning, and there's like Wing Stop on the couch. And tell me like, oh yeah, I ordered DoorDash. Is your guys' relationship and communication and everything, how is your relationship? I would say it's pretty good, other than the finances. Yeah. Yeah. Really? So, that's the one hard part. Yeah. Have you guys done anything to help, to try to mend the financial, financial part of the relationship? I mean, we're here. It's a good first step. Yeah. Mhm. So, this is it. This is the first step. You haven't done anything until now? No. When did you guys get married again? We got married. Yeah, it's 2020. Wow. It's a long time to wait to try to do anything finances. Okay. Okay. Here's our mortgage. This mortgage is incredible. And I'm, uh, it's disgusting that you're ruined with a HELOC. So, you took a risk by doing that down payment financing thing. It worked out in the end. Risky. Yeah. At a 2.7 rate. It's delicious. Yeah. We got. That sounds kind of high. I thought it, I thought it was 2.25. But, oh, yeah, 2.7. So, high compared to now. Yeah, I guess like the one good thing we've looked at. I'm happy. $1,236 a month and 4 cents. 40. Which it did go up quite a bit. Property. So, PMI? No. So, it was, um, my home insurance doubled. So, I got a new home insurance policy, and I signed stuff that said that they would cancel the other one, and it never canceled. So, my escrow account got hit with $3,000 in home insurance. Okay. And did you take care of it? Yes. Kind of. And then also, I have, I didn't file my homestead exemption. Why? I don't know. I know. Okay. Is when you guys talk about things and have conversations? Answer. I don't know about everything. Yes. Yes, I did file my homestead exemption. Now, when I saw it went up, cuz my, my mortgage used to only be like $950. Checking account. This scares the out of me. The absolute me. $121.67 in our checking account at the time of the statement. That's insane. We have kids. We have kids. But we choose to go out to eat and get Starbucks and do all this every day. And even shop at our own place with work. And we have $121 in our checking account. No sh. We're borrowing money from our paychecks. Here's this Aqua thing and more DoorDash, Nectar Juice, Spotify, the Juice Bar, water bill. Okay. And then the Juice Bar, Apple Cash, Scent, Apple Cash, Scent, Clear Cover. What's that? Wait, that's my car insurance. But can I talk about the Apple Pays? Those do get reimbursed for me. That's like if an employee buys something for the store at Kroger. Zelling. Not money. Adobe. Who? Z. Adobe. Um, we canceled that. Good. We got to buy our way out of it, though. Yeah. Affirm. Someone affirmed some hair removal at home. Yeah. Things. Mhm. I justified that in my head cuz it is cheaper than hair removal. He wanted that. Yeah, right. Um, don't need to go into that. Earning repayment. NBC, Peacock, Peacock. Nothing on there. Apple Bill, Amazon. There's the Apple Cash. Sign out. But we understand that now. Juice Bar, Chick-fil-A, some Taquitos, Juice Bar, Amazon, Amazon, Taquitos, Kindle Unlimited, which, you know, I'm not opposed to you having that at some point. Get out of debt first. At least have an emergency fund for the sake of your family first. Go to the library. And tell then, Juice Bar, Taquitos, and Apple Bill, Amazon, Taquito, Taquito, Apple Cash, Scent. We went over that, though. Adobe. She signed up for Photoshop on two accounts by accident. Yeah. Don't ask me how. And Lightroom. It was, it was like $100 a month. McDonald's, Wing Stop, Taquitos, Apple Bell, Taquito, Juice Bar, another Adobe. Three. Three. Mhm. All of them are canceled now. What are you? It was $100 a month. There's the Apple Cash, McDonald's. And then our savings went from $400 to $0. So, our finances are $100 in a checking account with two children wanting to have three. But yes, removing hair is the important thing. Yeah. It was sold to me like it was sold to me. List prevents you guys from getting and other children immediately. Grow that hair. The way it was sold to me was like, you would save money not buying razors. And all right. All, all right. But the fast food. Come on. Yeah. So, again, we spent about $1,000 more than came in. Mhm. Debt payments, total net in the end, 5.6% of our spending or $371.2017 net because, you know, we put more money on debt. So, but, n, that's how that worked. Housing, total 22.7% of our spending or $1,527. Phone, total 8.8%. Transportation, total 23.5% or $1,555.94. Necessary food, going to the grocery store, $136. That's not unreasonable for a family of four. 14% went going out to eat or $926.25. So, essentially double the grocery budget. I will say the Kroger, the grocery budget is highly inflated because of my job, and I get reimbursed for some of it. All of it? H. Yeah. What, like, if I, if I buy something at Kroger for? Okay, there were a few of those. Sure. Yeah. And so, groceries, though, we, we've talked about cooking at home and not eating out anymore. I will do that. He won't. Why? Be a, I don't agree with that. I really don't. Why? How do you not agree with that? So, I'll, I'll give the disagreement here. Like yesterday, um, I was like, on my way home, and she's like, have no food in the house. And I listed off like five different things that we had in the house. And she was basically didn't feel like making it. Is that true? Yeah. Okay. So, why are we putting the blame on him? Well, we hadn't gone grocery shopping this week, but we, we had food in the house. Eggs, Hot Pockets, mac and cheese. Yeah, there's Hot Pockets in there. Oh, there are Hot Pockets in there. She also said there wasn't mac and cheese in there. I got home and I showed her the mac and cheese. There are also Hot Pockets in there. There, there's food in our house. So, what do the kids eat? It, huh? What do kids eat it to? Everything. Everything. Everything. A lot of fruit. A lot of fruit. A lot of fruit. My kids are basically fruitarians. Yeah, which is expensive. So, we've gone to buying bags of frozen fruit. Not a bad idea. Yeah. Takes some longer to eat. Unknown shopping, total $58.39 of 7.8 spending. That's usually Walmart, Amazon. In your case, mostly Amazon and Target because we just do not know what was bought there. 1.2% of spending. A color. Healthcare, 1.9 was subscriptions. 6 was miscellaneous BS, which is mostly just stopping and getting some BS because we threw the Kroger in your grocery. Which a lot of those were stopping and getting something small. But I guess you're saying you're getting reimbursed for those at work. Sometimes I do get off work and we'll, I'll get like three gallons of milk cuz I also work next to a Kroger. Yeah. Our kids go through like a gallon of milk a day. Sure. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. But I will say that sometimes I will go, I don't normally drink coffee, but sometimes I will go and get some. If, oh my gosh, guys, get a Mr. Coffee for like $25. Everything can be cheap coffee. Just give you that little, that little high that you crave so much. I like coffee, but I don't like the taste of coffee. It doesn't. So, drink tea. Drink anything else that has caffeine. Diet Coke. I don't care if you don't like the taste of coffee, but you need the caffeine. Take a caffeine pill. Well, I like getting the sugary coffee drink. Said don't taste like. So, you like the. Okay. Well, shut the up and stop, is what I would say. Next time you want to go get that. It's called to be a big girl. Yeah. But if I'm, if I'm waking up in the middle of the night with my kids and I'm not getting enough sleep and I'm tired and stuff, I will say, I, the one that wakes up with the kids. So, our kids sleep through the night now, but I wake up with them at 4:00 in the morning when they wake up. Day. And then he, we wake up at 5, 5:30. Yeah, cuz I go to work at 6:00. So, what you just said was incorrect. So, that was your excuse for getting your little dessert coffees, but it wasn't true. Well, she does still get up pretty early, just cuz I leave for work pretty early. Dude, just make coffee. Fill it with sugar and milk. Like, figure it out. You can't afford it. It's as simple as that. Yeah. Okay. Other large purchases, 6.2% of spending or $410.39. Let's see how those broke down. Marshalls, Sport Clips, and miscellaneous. Oh, that's where all the stopping and getting the things went. That's where we put it. Okay. Where, in the other large purchases, just combined them as essentially one big thing. Got it. What is our goal financially? What, where, where are we right now in terms of our goals as a couple? I've mentioned to him cuz he has told me multiple times now that we go further into debt every month. So, I have mentioned putting our kids in daycare and going to get a job. But he doesn't want me to go and get a job. Why? Well, because, so this is one thing. I mean, that's not what that's not what she ultimately would like. So, would like to stay home with my kids. But if I need to go out. So, you choose. I do only work 40 hours a week, so I can go out and make more money. And I guess where he's coming, I can't get another job where I have a commitment, but I can go out and do like 1099 side hustles. Let me try. I like to come. Where he's coming from also is the income I would bring up, bring in would basically be the same amount as a daycare. $2,400 a month. Well, have you shopped around? Yeah. How much? She's very particular about the daycare, though. Well, fair enough. Yeah, I mean, my kids are going there. Um, I used. How much? How much? $2,400. A month. Yeah. So, I guess it's probably you buckling down and making some more money. Yeah, if we're not going to compromise on anything. And even they're at a daycare right now while we're filming this, and it was $25 an hour that we are paying for. Thank you very much. Thankfully. Thank you. Okay, let's do your budget. Yep. So, total income across everything was the, okay. So, what came in was $5,161. Okay. Let's get your minimum monthly debts. $947.50 for debt payments. Now, our mortgage, which I'm not including in that, is $1,236.47. Love the rate. Uh, water. What was that? Water bill? What's our water bill? Like $20 a month. Okay. Gas and electric. Nothing. Huh? How, oh, electric. Oh, it's 265. But that's another one that's just highly inflated. So, we didn't live in our house the first like 8 months it was there, and I enrolled in average billing. So, when I, the first year, the payments were like $60 a month, but they, How many square feet? Um, it's 1309. Okay. And then it went to 265. Going to say 100. Okay. But it is, it's 265 every month for how long? I think it, I think the average billing resets in September. Okay. 265. Internet, it's $50 a month. T-Mobile home internet. Gas on average. Room, room. Car gas. Um, probably $400 a month. Car insurance is two, $296. I mean, $196, sorry, for both. Yeah. Okay. Toilet paper fund for the house. We got to get things for the kids. We got to, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Really anything and everything else you need to survive around the house is get all the goodies. When you take the button program, it's going to be more intensive, and you're going to line out everything. But $200. Necessary food. Okay. I think we could do about $900. Should be that you're going to figure out the exact number, but I think we should be able to do about $900. Medical, healthcare, gym, that kind of stuff. So, we don't, our health insurance is like $25 a month. Depending on what I, if I start hustles, that's what it costs. But is that get taken out of your paycheck before? No, I'm on, we're on Obamacare. Uh, my job doesn't have insurance. But you work 40 hours a week. Yeah. I thought that was the law. Did they repeal that part of the law? It's a small business. So.

Yeah, oh, okay. But if I go out and do like side hustles and stuff, since it is based on income, you...

Subscriptions? Nothing. We don't have any right now. Anything else in your budget that I am missing? These are the usual go-tos, obviously your uh phone. Phone, we pay $50. It looks like. No, that was T-Mobile home internet. Oh, okay. Um, we pay $116 a month to my parents. That's those are the Zells to your parents? Yeah. Why is it so much? Because my phone is financed. Once you pay that off, dude, switch to Helium. I partnered with them specifically so that I can get people like you on like $2 month plans to use the same tower towers. It's crazy. $116? It's crazy. Yeah, the lines, the lines are $55 each.

So you considered a work-from-home job with the kids? I have actually. I just haven't been able to really find one that's like suitable for me. Yeah, most of them you have to be on the phone and she... We just got to wait a little bit longer. Yeah, so the kids can be quiet. But that could be something cool. One thing you could do, I mean, I'm just thinking of people, the resources that we set up people with, if you want to do like a tech work-from-home thing, I could probably set you up with a certification through Course Careers. We could probably do that 'cause we partner with them as well.

Um, that'd be cool. I would like to bring in money for us. Absolutely. And I was actually, not, not anymore because he's in an actual preschool now, but I was for a while watching my nephew and they were, my, our, my sister and brother-in-law were paying me to watch him and I was bringing in about $400 a month doing that. So at least it was something.

It was something that would cover your gas, right? I mean, gas is so expensive. And only you drive? No, oh, you drive a lot. She drives to her mom's house an hour away. Oh, how often? Jeez. A week to Grandma's? Okay. Sure. She's happy.

One thing that is really cool, I know I've talked a little, I'm cheeky about children 'cause they're just a... but like, um, one thing that is actually really cool, and this is something that, you know, I'm lucky enough being the first born when, um, my, my parents are 19 and 18. What is cool is these two, and potentially three, they're going to have a long time with you guys. Which is really cool. You guys are going to be able to be young and active when they are able to go do things. You can take trips and all these things. But in order for us to live that cool life and stuff, we got to take care of our finances now so that you can do those trips.

Mhm. And things that you'll want to do when they are able to, you know, form core memories and actually do things. You want to be those fun, fun, young, active parents. I think that's an argument that I've made with him about me going to get a job is 'cause I have said that I want to be able to live comfortably and be able to do that stuff with them. And listen, if you want to, you can.

How much can? Okay, so this was, what, what town does Grandma live in? How far away from Houston is? Um, it's about 30, 40 minutes. What if, hear me out here, this would suck, this would take some grinding. Wait, what does Grandma do right now? She works from home. She does oil and gas stuff. Is she able to do babysitting? I know it's okay. So I'm just, I'm, I'm just in brainstorming. No. Yes and no. Um, I could potentially get a job in Cypress 'cause she lives. Yeah, that's what I was thinking. Yeah, like she lives like 20 minutes from like all the stuff in Cypress. Dude, even if you were making $7.25 an hour and she was babysitting for free, that's still more money in y'all's pockets. Now, it might cover the gas that's required to get there, but even still, that's just an example, right? So if she's able to, if we're able to utilize her and you still have to drive, like it'll be an inconvenience, but if, if you're able to bring in an extra $500, maybe even $1,000 a month, that pushes, that pushes us closer. Right now, we have a necessity of three thou... $4,355.59 a month to survive. That's our minimum.

How much? $4,355. Yeah, it's life, buddy. It's expensive. You guys got yourself into a mortgage. I mean, it wouldn't be much higher than your rent would be, honestly. But, um, it's probably lower. Well, I mean, depending. People think they can't really find bargains and then I pull up the bargain, show them, and I know it's in a safe area and they're like, "I guess I just never looked." Yeah. But either way, yes, that's probably what it would be about anyway. But it's going to be like, it's going to go back to $900 a month next year. Yeah, after, after, after it re... No, for... That will be fantastic. That'll be incredible. It'll be different at that time. Also, for the groceries, I feel like it's a little high since I don't. Well, I mean, if I eat at five days a week, so... Right? Yeah, you should be getting your free lunch. You should be getting your free stuff. Not buying stuff. What I'm saying. Yeah, but still, eat dinner at home. Mhm. And then I have to cook food for myself and the kids. Day. You know, again, you guys will figure out the exact number when you take the program, right? This is, I'm trying to be a little more conservative on numbers just so we can figure out our debt payoff strategy.

Guys, it's a new year and you need to make your money work for you. You can do exactly what I literally do right now and put my money in the best high-yield savings account. So I get a 4.6% yield on my money and I also took advantage of the bonus of up to $250 when I signed up. You can start 2024 off amazing by doing the same by going to the link in the description below. Should have an extra, let's call it $800 a month. That's our lovely little extra money. Nothing in savings? $0 in savings. Only have $100 in checking account. Well, we do have, we do have money in savings. I've been just set up auto savings of $200 a month or $200 a week. And how much is in there? $400. Right. How much is in retirement? Uh, nothing. Okay. It's irresponsible as a parent. How much is in retirement? You don't make any money. So zero. Mhm. Okay. Very irresponsible as a parent. I've gone in a rant multiple times. I feel like I don't need to anymore, but blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Essentially, your kids will have to take care of you for retirement because they're, they'll feel morally responsible too. And you're putting McDonald's over that. So yeah.

Okay. Have $400 in there. So first month, let's put $100. Uh, $800 aside. That puts $1,000 savings. Usually, we don't want to start doing things until we get a one-month emergency fund, but even still, man. Also, it's five months. Takes over five months to get a one-month emergency fund. Yeah. What? One thing you did miss in here, where was the Tracee credit card? Was after the mortgage, right here. Was that this is the current balance on my card? So the monthly payment is based off of this. I thought you said it was this was after it went up. Sorry. I thought it went down from $5,200 to $2,446. No, that was the, the car repairs, like just recently. But what we doing? It's going to take five months to get a one-month emergency fund before we can even start tackling our debt. And then it's going to take, then it's going to take. I know. And then it's going to take six months to pay off the Freedom Card. And it'll take one month to pay off the Apple Card. So that's seven months to pay off the credit cards. And the HELOC, that's going to take, that's insanity. That's going to take 40 months. 40 debt months. And we got to pay off the car, which is at a 9% horrible rate. I could definitely refinance that now with your credit score. No, it's, it's 750 now. Really? After I got the HELOC? Yeah. Shot up even with your current credit card balances. Yeah. Okay. Uh, and then, then it'll take 26 months to pay. But your balance will still be the same regardless. Yeah. And then 26 months to pay off the Toyota. So this is a, what, five, six-year process? Five, six-year process. So if you can bring in any $500, it accelerates this about 33%. If you can. And then, yes, you talked about going and getting another job, packing ham and cheese for your dinner in between. Sure. If you do that, that's great. Listen, if you double this to an extra $1,600 bucks a month net, I mean, that takes it down from six years to three years. Three years to sacrifice is nothing. The kids are going to be five, they barely remember anything around then anyway. They're starting to form their memories. Um, so I mean, that's great. Then they'll only know a life of their parents not being stressed up about finances. So let's just say that worst-case scenario with a bunch of sacrifice, it takes three years to pay off all the bad debt. How you see mortgage rates sitting and paying off that monthly payment till it's paid off. Um, but everything else we're taking care of as quick as possible. Say it takes three years. That's nothing. Three years in the remainder of your life, 25, 26, it's nothing. It'll fly by so quick. You guys have such great potential in your life, such a great life left to live as a couple and for your kids, and to bring another kid into this world. There is a lot of potential here. And man, if it's a sacrifice for three years, it is so worth it. So it's going to be a little harder for you to figure out potential income situations, but if you can, again, I'm happy to, uh, gift you a certification to help at least kickstart that. Have to take the education, but that's a good way to kickstart, uh, which will be good for work-from-home stuff. But and then you, if you can work just a few extra shifts, you know, at a different job or at that job, if you can, I don't know what's available, but even if it's at an other job, a couple nights a week, if we can bring this from max extra $800 a month to $1,600 bucks a month for three years, which I think will be the worst-case scenario. If you bring in $1,600 bucks, yeah, in, like a month and a half or so, I'll be traveling all around Houston to different nectar, different stores. What should I do with the mileage money? Put it towards gas. But you don't spend 62 cents a mile in gas, right? Right, right, right. Well, if there's anything extra, just put it in the, whatever method you're going towards, okay? Yeah, if you, anything extra, just include that as you're getting towards that doubling the $800 goal. Okay? Yeah. But also remember, this is also taking into account maintenance on your car. It's taking into account a lot of things. So there's going to be expenses that pop up. The more miles you put on your car, car that's already needed a massive repair. Yeah. And is 2005, 2009? Even though it's a reliable car. Mhm. Yeah. There's bearing noise in the transmission. So yeah, it's, it's aging. Is there any budget? Did you put any budget in there for like other things that might come up like needs? I don't know. One thing that comes to the top of my mind right now is that we like desperately need a hard water softener. It's like ruining everything in my house, my toilets, my showers, my tile. Well, typically that's what we put the toilet paper fund in this conversation. 'Cause this conversation, it would take hours for us to, uh, you and I to all sit down here and come up with an actual line-by-line budget. So we do the toilet paper fund, which covers like, it shouldn't be $200 a month goes to toilet paper. That's not what it is. It's those extra things. It's going to be a little bit of a cushion where some of it goes to the next month to cover larger expenses, you know, and it just kind of rolls over. And then as you're going through the program, you're going to get an actual line-by-line budget that you build. And the only way for you to actually do a budget that you stick to, you need to build it. You need to build it, not someone else build it for you. You need to go through it and figure it out. And you're going to do it together because if you guys do not approach this together, it's not going to work. Okay? Okay. Sacrifice, man. Go. Yeah. Sure. You can make it last six years, or you can go bring in an extra $800 bucks a month net, make it last three years. Bring in even more together, and it'll go even quicker. So it's up to you guys what you do from here, but you need a budget. Can't go out to eat anymore. Can't do all that. It's a temporary sacrifice. You're going to be in your mid-20s by then. Then just follow the 50/30/20. 50% on needs, which is easy to fit with your mortgage. 30% on wants, and 20% is good enough for your investing at that point. Max out your workplace retirement accounts. And if you do that, open up brokerages. You can do MooMoo like I do. You can do anything and everything from there. That's where the fun conversations start. That's where the fun conversations start. Until then, it's the, the pain in conversation, which is this. So any final thoughts from either of you? I don't. Do you? No. Okay. So you said five, you said zero for your financial score. Let's figure out your financial [Applause] score. Spending in a budget, we're making payday advances, and we only have $1 in our checking account. It's harder for me to give anywhere higher than two. Debt is not, ah, heck's not great, but it's not the worst of the worst. But it's really not good either. So probably get two out of 10 there. Emergency fund, you have $400 now, so I'll give you, I'll give you one. Retirement, there's nothing at all. Anyway, zero. Real estate is good. There might be a 401k somewhere. The HELOC brings it down, so it's going to be about a four out of 10. It would be higher. You keep saying that. Is that, should I have just kept the credit card debt? We would have had to approach that situation in that moment, man. I don't know. But that doesn't all of a sudden make the HELOC good. True. If we sat down in that moment, we could have figured out different solutions and brainstormed. I don't know what you looked like at that point. I don't know where your income was. I don't know where your spending was. If your spending maintained this in any way whatsoever, the amount that you spent on going out to eat would have covered those credit card bills. Hammer Financial Score: Two out of 10. Make sure to check out all the resources linked in the description below. These are what I use or would use in specific situations, including the best budgeting program in the history of the internet. Thanks to all of our Patreon producers for making this episode possible. If you want to participate in an episode of Financial Audit and you're able to make it to Austin, Texas, please fill out an application in the survey linked in the description below. You can also send a link to your friends or family who you think might be good to be on the show. If you have any questions, you can email casting@cophammer.com.