Kevin Samuels HUMBLES CONFUSED Woman With Unrealistic Expectations

What's going on everyone, and welcome back to Sto Context. Today, we are going to react to another Kevin Samuels video. Before we get into it, make sure you guys like and subscribe. I'm going to be saving my commentary for the end of the video, so stay tuned for that.

Oh, great. How are you, Mr. Kevin?

I am well. Good. I am well. I have been highly anticipating this interaction.

Okay, let's do it. So, you know what, I'll get started. I have a few questions for you. Um, before that, why don't you tell people your name?

I'm sorry, my name's Toana.

All right. And how did you come across my content?

So, I'm in a few social media groups that post your videos often, um, and also I'm Facebook.

Are these Facebook groups?

Are these Facebook groups? Yeah, Facebook groups. Yeah.

All right. Are they run by men or women?

They are run by men because I'm on a show called Lece and, um, and uh, that show is ran by men as well. Um, and so we often, uh, talk about your perspectives.

Okay. Yes. So, a lot of your critiques probably about some of my comments?

Well, uh, well, my, my perspectives are perspectives that honestly men have been sharing for the longest in barber shops, on basketball courts, uh, in places where men used to be able to speak freely, like men. Yeah. Um, so it used to be all right for men to be able to be honest about what they thought, but we live in a culture now to where men are canceled. So, as a matter of survival, men just don't say anything, but the actions are speaking. So, most women seem to have an issue with my tone, but what really never happens is people never really argue the points I make, the facts, the data, statistics. It's always about the man.

Well, I'm definitely going to change that, okay? Because I don't believe that you're wrong. Okay? I think that you just have no flexibility, no room. And the reasons that I think that is because, for instance, why do you even ask women to rank them? Why do you think it's important for them to judge yourselves, especially when you're not really going to consider the whole of them anyway, right? You're just gonna rank them based on the surface level. What do I, what's my profession?

You're an image consultant, right? And what is an image consultant concerned himself with?

But then here's my concern.

No, no, no, no, no, no. You ask me, and you got to let me explain it.

Okay, go ahead. I'm sorry.

Consultant. An image consultant is concerned with what?

Well, are you only concerned with?

Okay, we got. I'm answering the question.

Okay. See that?

Well, I'm asking image consult.

Okay. Have you ever been to, have you ever been to a hair stylist?

Yeah.

You don't ask them to clean your teeth.

Absolutely not. An image consultant is concerned with your image. And I style men and women. And the, and I'm only, and most people don't need an image consultant. Middle-class people don't to be need image consultants. This is a service for the top 1%. And I'm in the service class, the 20%. The service is the top 1%. But in that group, there are men and women. I'm working with women who want to become the best version of themselves for personal and professional reasons. Men who want to do the same. One thing that I started to notice was that my guys were coming in for personal, many for prof, many for some for professional, most of personal reasons, wanting a different outcome in dating. And when they came in looking like this and came out like that with a complete image, appearance, behavior, communication, digital footprint, ABCD, a complete makeover, a new man, there were more and more of my black clients were coming back saying, "I'm not seeing any women on my level, my new level where I'm achieving to. I am not. I can't find anyone." I am hearing women who arguably, um, are coming back saying they can't find these men. These two people existed. So, I'm having a conversation that my female clients are having, my male clients are having. It now. Why do I concern myself with image? Because it matters to who I'm talking for. Men, we are visual. It matters. And I don't, I don't think that women today really understand who men are and don't understand how much it matters. So it seems superficial when it's not.

Go ahead.

So, but attraction, yes, it's the initial thing that, you know, gets the relationship going. But is it really truly going to sustain a relationship?

Right. It gives women this false perception that really all they needed looks in order to.

No, see, that's the another thing. I, I, I never said that.

But you say fit, beautiful, and cooperative. Yes. It gets you in. Just like being ranked high in an organization gets you an interview for management. It doesn't guarantee. I never say. And here's the thing, I am not a one-stop shop to say, "Well, if you do this, you're going to be able to be happily married." That's not even what I do. My job, as an image consultant, has helped you nail that first seven seconds. If you fail that, you can't even get to the date. There are other people who help down that path. There are things I can do along that way with interpersonal communication, uh, soft skills, communication skills, things like that. But I'm not trying to be all things to all people. But if you notice, I ask the same questions. When I spoke to men, I asked the similar questions.

What are the questions that? Because you ladies are familiar with the height, weight, dress size, all that other stuff. But what are some of the questions I ask men?

That's a good point. Because I have not seen any videos where you talk to men. Most of the videos that I've seen specifically the women. So the men, to me, they look like they just have no depth. Like they can't see beyond the physical. And I understand that. You know, for three, full years, for three full years, I've talked to men, and the videos are there. So it's not as though the work's not there. Most people don't want to go do the work. When I talk to men, one of the first things I ask: age, marital status, kids, how many hours? Ask you your income, how much are you making annually? How, how many hours a week are you working? I ask them a lot of questions about production. For nine weeks, I had a show called The Lion's Den, which was like where Shark Tank meets The Voice. And we were actually talking to men coming in in a mock Shark Tank environment, talking to business owners, trying to help them get one thing to another. I have always told men, I don't want to hear your broke problems. I think men should pay 100% everything, regardless as to what a woman has. If you ain't working 60 hours a week, or if you're not working 60 hours a week, in my opinion, you're lazy. Get off of YouTube, get off of social media. I have always been very direct with men. But here's the thing, even that video that went viral about that woman, they went back to a video I did in January, which is arguably far more savage. But, you know, the difference? That man who got that savage treatment thanked me, booked a session with me after that, and became a client. Has improved since then. When people tried to use that video to come at me, he actually came out and said, "No, no, no, no. I thank that brother for what he did because it helped me with a reality check to get my life on track to do what I'm doing now." Men take the criticism and either eat the meat, spit out the bones. Women, on the other hand, decide to destroy you instead of looking and say whether or not the criticism is valid based upon the outcomes they want.

I think, I think most of it is that it sounds like the men are really focused on physical characteristics, right? They want these women who are fit, who are cooperative, who are beautiful, beautiful. And then are these women are even trying to settle down with them, right? Like, how do they know that their expectations of women are not contributing to low marriage rates? Okay? And I just feel like, how are high value, like these men, okay? You ask two, are you making this? It sounds like these men, I guess these are rhetorical questions, but I'm, I'm just wondering, are high value men even looking for marriage? Because some of the characteristics, that's how we got here. I asked a question back in fall of the winter of last year, what do rich, wealthy, non, what, what do rich and wealthy, middle class, lower upper class, uh, and upper class non-black people know and understand about marriage? Men know and understand about marriage that they marry, divorce, and remarry in the current environment that middle class and lower upper class black men don't. And I got savage for asking black men about this. Those questions on Instagram, the videos are still on YouTube. Why are, why are men afraid of marriage? Go back, they're all there. Everything that all my critics have to say that I don't do is all there. And what came out of this was women wanted men who were high value. And I defined what high value meant outside of simply money. Then I also asked these men who are high value men, who I know, who I'm a part of, who have been around with, who have been around for 20 plus, 30 years, what do these kind of men want from from a woman that they want to marry? My show is about marriage.

Well, it seemed like a supply and demand issue. The things that they want, are they even finding? Because it's so unrealistic. These men, these high value men, the things that they, what do they want? The, what from what I, from what you tell me, they want these thick, cooperative, beautiful people, but they have no other substances that they like. Do they want transparency?

Hold on, let me see. What I don't, what I don't, what I don't do is what you continue to do. I don't judge people for what they want. You keep judging men for what they want. That's not my. I'm just saying that that's my, my thing is, Toana, if someone comes to your restaurant and orders that 300 pounds and come order a triple cheeseburger, a large fry, and a Coke, are you gonna sit there and ask them about their health? Are you gonna, are you gonna take the order?

Kevin, when are you gonna help them shift? The world is shifting. You're gonna help them stay the.

No, no, no. You're gonna help them physical.

No, no, no. See, you keep skipping. I've already done that with the men. See, the presump, call the presumption, the presumption has always been that the problem is with the men. And that is where the data comes from. My show has proven that there are men out here who are upper class, who are middle class, upper middle class, and rich and wealthy, who want to marry black women. The problem is they can't find suitable, want, they can't find women suitable for marriage, fit for marriage. So they're targeting women who are emotionally unable.

No, that's your perception. That is my perception. It's my perception based on what you've said. They're targeting women that are, they have lived their life just like you've lived yours, and these women do not want them. These fit, beautiful, cooperative women do not want them. That is why they're having trouble.

The want. That's not true either. All right. I'm just telling you what.

If it were, then why do I have three people engaged right now in under three months? And I can't keep.

Three out of how many?

[ __ ] oh, see, see, see. Now this is what we do. This is what we do. Telling you, I'm just. No, no, man. See, this is what we do. First, we say it's not something. Then you prove facts, data, statistics, and you move the goalpost. Why don't you say, you know what, eight couples got together in three months in a Facebook group. I'm not even a matchmaker. And three engagements happened. Two who are verified, put videos on YouTube. And instead of saying, "Hmm, that goes against what I thought," you stay, "Well, why don't you have 20?" I commend you for that. I, I do think that that's important information. Let me ask you this. Let me ask you, let me ask you a question. Let me ask you a question, okay? Where are the women like yourself? And the women who are my critics, where are you producing relationships?

Well, you know, that's not my platform. You know, you're an image consultant.

Not my platform either. Yeah. I can change. But you ask, but you ask me why. Where is this? And I produce something that even my platform. Where are the people who are writing all the books, the self-help gurus, the love doctors, and all these other things that people follow that that make millions off of this? Where are the relationships?

I just think you have a powerful voice, and I think your perspective doesn't leave room for change. And that's why I don't. Nobody wants to receive love the way you describe it. Nobody wants to feel.

No, you don't. You don't. I'm sorry. Sorry. Sorry. The numbers say different.

To have fun, yes, but someone to trust, someone with my heart, to trust someone with their heart.

You keep going back. This is what I've noticed with you. Yes. Tell me what everything through your perspective, and it doesn't matter if two plus two is four. I can tell you eight couples got together, and you're still saying, "Yeah, but everybody, but that ain't enough."

Well, you got thousands of followers. I mean, you know, we got to put it in perspective.

And ra. You know, no, no, we don't. Steve Harvey has sold millions of books. Where are the marriages? Okay? How is that gonna shift the marri?

But the point is, see, why, why, and my question again, why do you keep asking one black man to fix the world? And you ain't asking none of this from black women. Where the black women to fix? I want you to make it where we can. I don't want to do another damn thing. Where are you gonna help? What you? I don't know what I'm doing. When are y'all gonna come fix it?

What you need me to do? Because I'm ready.

I need you to get these women fit. F. I need you to get these women fit, feminine, friendly, cooperative, and submissive.

If I thought that that was gonna make them more marketable, I would do it. That's what the men say they want. That's what they say they want. So now you know. So now I want you guys to understand something. Now, the men say they want this, and she's not, and she says she wants to help, but she don't want to give the men what they want. So again, I'm just saying, you want to give the men.

No, no, no, no, ma'am. You want to give the men what you think they want.

Are you listening?

But are you listening to my perspective though? Are they picking quality based on things that's definite to change? It's it's very shallow.

You keep saying shallow. How?

Okay, okay, Toana, let's go. Let's go down that path. It's shallow. And that's what they want. They want cheap.

Okay. So what matters beyond fitness?

They want cheap pizza.

Toana, they want cheap pizza.

Tell me that.

They want cheap pizza.

Okay. So there's no room to move. I guess we're stuck then.

No, we're not. We're not stuck. We're both stuck. We're not stuck. We're not. We're not stuck. See, I don't know if you realize this, but I'mma tell you, okay? And I hope you hear this. I hear black men have grown tired of being told by women like yourself what they should want and how they should want it. They're sick of it.

Well, I didn't tell them what they want. I asked them. I challenged why they want that.

And you don't have the right. And who are you to challenge what these grown damn.

They who, who are we both to tell people?

No, no, but see, if somebody were to, but see, if someone were to challenge you that way, you would take feel some kind of way about it. These, these, and here's the thing, these grown damn men who have made themselves who they are. This is what they want.

Well, you know, it just sounds like a business deal to me. So I guess values don't match anyway. That's how marriage is to them. So what, like it or not, like it or not, marriage has always been a business deal.

I'm sorry. Go back to the old countries. People didn't fall in love. There was no long dating. There were arranged marriages.

What are you talking about? Even in the black community, it doesn't stop there, though. It's the core, but it doesn't stop there. And that's what at the end of the day.

Okay. Who, who controls access to marriage? Men or women?

Well, I think it's men because they have the power, right? So if men, if, okay, so if men are the one, the the consumers, the buyers, and women are the sellers, if men aren't purchasing enough marriage, is it the problem with the men or the problem with the women?

It could be a problem with the expectations. And being on the men's side. So you want to go to. So again, and men are tired of hearing this. Sorry, sir, you've got the credit rating.

Okay. So let's take it your way. Okay. The problem with the men, problems with the expectations. So don't say [ __ ] when he go marry Becky.

Well, well, what about she go marry John? Nobody, nobody. Black men don't complain when when black women marry out. It doesn't happen that often.

No, no, no. See, but see, that's the thing. When I said, don't complain when she, because if you said the problems with the expectation, that means the expectation is too high. Then if that's the case, and if he goes and gets it met outside the race, don't complain because he made the expectation clear that he wanted. You have an opportunity to hear the expectation immediately. You chose not to. He took his business elsewhere. Don't complain.

So I just think it's no flexibility.

Okay. Then why, if there's no flexibility, why are black men in this country two million less than you and 847,000 more marriages?

I think that, like you said, men control marriage, right? They control that. The reason, yeah, the notion. If there was no black men are more married than black women, the the fle, the inflexibility, Toana, is on black women's side. You know why? Because no sane human being can tell me that men want women that weigh more than they do at their height. Black men have been consistently saying they want three things from black women for my life.

600 lb life.

No, no. I don't. Because it's, I'm just saying them women all have. And that, and that, and that. And if you expect that, then go get a broke dude. Listen, I'm not saying that I want to be. Okay, but that's the point. And see, this is what happens when black men say what they want. It becomes a joke. Everybody, every other group. Yeah, yeah. It really isn't. I don't take it as a joke. Because every other group of men can make expectations, demands of their women. Black women almost want us to act like a hyena clan where there's a matriarchy, where we do what the women say.

Well, men aren't doing it. Bottom line is, men have said enough. Black men have been asking for my generation, the previous generation, and the generations after for three simple things for women: cooperation. Black women have become far less cooperative in my lifetime. Fitness. Eight out of 10 black women are overweight, and 80% of that number is obese. Failed that number too. And then this, where your own natural hair. We got a 10 billion, uh, hair care market. And yet our boys are at the bottom. I said this, take 9 billion of that money. We put on your head, put it into your boys to raise a better crop of men. Because if you don't give a [ __ ] about the men who are walking around right now, fine. We ain't [ __ ]. We're all horrible. What about the boys? You cannot build. You cannot build.

Huh? It's gonna be a challenge for them. They are only focused on those, those superficial things. It's going to be a challenge for them if they're F, if they're. It's going to be a challenge for them if they're raised by the same women who are inflexible with the men, with the adult males. You keep going back to the men being the problem. And I'm sorry, the data, the, the overwhelming real reality is the problem is on the inflexibility of the women's side.

I mean, my data suggests that, you know, also men do marry women who are less attractive because they are more emotionally available to them. And men like their ego stroked. They like to feel when they're in a relationship. So I, Al, I also saw that that's the opposite. So that's what I'm saying is that we, we have this idea and this conception of. And when do they marry these women? Most, I mean, you're talking about men, high value men, they may be in their 40s, right?

Cooperative women. See, this is, this is when you, this is where the argument comes to disingenuous. High value men, if you see them with average women, I've said this a hundred times, they got them early. They married early on in life, and that woman worked that way up, built with that man, was his partner. So she got her man because she delayed her gratification. It was there as a part of his success. Many women today will tell you, they don't want to build a bread or build the oo. They want you to already have it. So that's fine. But here's the thing, when a man puts himself and becomes in the top 10% of earners, he is going to have options. And men who have options worldwide, you look at what men worldwide wife pick to marry after they're rich, and it is traditionally younger, hotter, fitter women.

Okay. But think about this. If they, that true or false? Why are they? Is that true or false?

Before you move on. Is that true or false?

It could be true. I think it's true.

Okay. So let me, let's move on from that. Why are they still struggling to find women and partners? And then also, if they want, who's struggling to find women and partners? Who, who's struggling to find these men? These men you said that they came to you for these this advice on how to find these women, right? They're, they're struggling with their love life. Why, if they have all these things?

That's what I'm saying. It's something else.

Listen, no, no. See, that's where you, no, that's where you are partial listening. They're not finding women on their level. I didn't say they were struggling. What they're doing is expanding their dating options because black women, most people want to their own people. They're unrealistic.

That's, that's why. Hold on. That's why you can't even let me. You can't even let me answer. You want again. I'm sorry. I thought you was done. Done.

Men are tired of you. No. When a man has made himself the best version of himself, and he looks around and he looks and says, "You know what? I at least want a woman who's fit." And if I can't get a woman who is, what is the average weight of a black woman in this country?

You asking me? I don't know.

87 pounds.

Okay. And what is the average weight of the American man?

168 pounds.

The average black woman is almost 20 pounds more than a man. So when men have had to go to college, or go to blue college, get a a job, career, get out there, hustle, whatever, and all he's asking is, "Can you just be fit so I can have a woman who has another 20, 30, 40, 50 pounds of p on after childbirth?" They can't even get that. That's the struggle. Not that women don't exist, is that the women don't exist in the way that they need to exist. And you got to tell me that there is a reason that a single woman with no children is 200 plus pounds.

Well, you know, I'm not justifying that, and obviously can't be. I do think, no, I think that being fit and being beautiful and being cooperative is essential in a relationship. Do I think that that is the only thing that you need look for in a woman? Only.

But if it's a starting point. But see, that's the thing. Starting point. You keep going back. You keep going back. And if it's the starting point, and it matters, eight out of 10 black women are automatically deleted. There are women who are are advocates for dating out, swirling, who even would say, you know what, I had to stop talking to my women about, uh, fitness to even incent them to date. It's not that they won't get fit for black men, they won't get fit for any men. But you also have to understand that every man has their own standard of beauty. And so, yeah, you, we keep going back.

Judge women based on. Okay, then if that's the case, we shouldn't have Miss Universe or People's Most Beautiful, Beautiful Person. That's a, that's a point.

Looking for AR. Okay. But, but there is. They have other things. Makes. If that's the case, if that's the case, then why do we have so much facts, data, and statistics, psychology on beauty? Why do we have such a plethora of studies done with animals and babies showing them pictures of faces and faces that have the Fibonacci sequence, feed the golden ratio, more symmetrical faces, more babies smile at those pictures worldwide, regardless of race? Because beauty is not subjective, like so many people want to think. It's objective. There's an objective standard of beauty. But then today, we've given everybody trophies that everybody can win. And the reality is, Toana, if what women is doing is working, why are one in four women today on some sort of psych med? And their happiness is through the roof, through the floor.

Yeah, I'm not saying that what women are doing is working. Then who need? What I'm saying is the narrative that you. That's not my narrative, man. That's the facts, ma'am. They're not happy.

If they're not happy, if they're not happy, whose responsibility is it? For them to change?

I mean, but you, you're, you're telling me that these responsibilities is for them to change. These highly successful men are not finding the women that they.

No, ma'am. You again, that's their level. Nope, nope. You're, you're now, you're gaslighting. I'm back. Nope. I've already addressed that. You, you trying to make something. Not. I'm gaslighting because I've already said what I said. I said they can't find women who top.

No, ma'am. I've already said that these men are not finding women. Finding women. They're not fit. I said they are finding women. They're not fit. Let me say it again. They are available females. They're not fit. They fail the fitness test that that disqualifies them. And what you're saying is, well, look at.

Okay, no, no. Okay, well, then how many hundreds of thousands of men have you spoke to on this issue?

Well, I, I haven't spoken to thousands of men, but I've spoken to a number of them. And if I've spoken to thousands of men over a doz, over close to 10 years, I will take my thousands over 10 years versus your few. Because these are, ma'am, because understand something, because these are the men who are picking. These are the men who have the means and the attitude and the desire to get married. And they're not finding women who are fit.

See, here's what you're not missing. First off, no. Listen, listen, listen. No, I've already. I'm gonna address this point. We go back to my point. Women are not happy. And what they're doing is not working. Whose responsibility? Whose responsibility is to change the situation?

Women.

Right. And they're not doing it. So if women are unhappy, it's women's responsibility to change it, right? And the first thing they can change is what they see in the mirror. But they're not.

Men are unhappy and they're not changing either. So what do we do?

Men are not. Men don't have. Men don't have. Have you heard? No, no, no, no. You're talking. No, ma'am. For 40 years, Sally Jesse Raphael, Ricki Lake, Oprah, Donahue. We have had daytime talk is lited with, "We're all the good men. I can't find no men." Just because in the last few months, you've seen some MGTOW, incel videos, you cannot make that substitute for damn near 50 years of, "I can't find no man." Men are tired. And what you keep doing is going back to saying, "Well, men aren't the problem. Men know what they want. Women aren't getting aren't giving men what they want, and men aren't taking the deal." That's where it is.

Well, I think about this. Let me, let me ask you this, then. Two things. Go ahead. When you adjust for working men, working women, one to one. But when you add one more variable in the black community, working men with no kids, working black woman with kids. There are more black women working with kids than working than men over here with no children. Basically, what I'm telling you is, if you are a man out here, you are finding a woman that has one of these two things off rip: overweight or a child. Okay? That disqualifies you from high value. So then they comp. I mean, and those two things can be controlled.

True or false?

Absolutely false.

I mean, true. Well, okay. Well, so, so if a woman says, "I want a man who can pay all the bills. I want all these things." And you want a provider male. Then it's only fair to say, you got to ask the man who has these things, what does he want from a woman? And he says he wants a woman who's fit and childless. You can't get mad at him and say, "Well, that's superficial."

Okay, well, if we go to the pool and we see that these pool, the pool of women, honey, okay? If we see that all of these characteristics that they have decided they want are just unrealistic, right? Or she can be fit and ignorant, or she could be cooperative and don't care about you. So all I'm saying is, if they're looking at these characteristics and not finding what they want, when do they go back and say, "Let me rethink this?"

Well, see, the presump, the presumption. See, the presumption you keep making is they look at this pool of women, and every woman over here has, they're this, or they're that. Okay? But there are plenty of pools of women. See, we live in a connected world. That's what the dating apps are for. You got men going, moving out of the country, the Dominican Republic, going other places to find women, dating outside their race. They're finding it. They can't find it in Black America. But 85% of them are marrying black women. So there must be. Again, those are two different numbers. I deal with men who are high value. You try, you, you're blending conversations, conflating arguments. I'm talking about men who have enough who can make demands.

And what percentage of them exist? Because I don't know. You tell me. Black men that earn over, that earn over six figures? 8% in the black community. But over $75,000? 15% in the black community. These men aren't complaining about not being able to find women. They, they choose, they prefer to marry black women. And here's the real thing: black men are far more race loyal than black women. If black women could date out like black men can, it's e, it's, you can make a strong argument that they would. There is no black male, there is no black male swirl movement. Black men have been trying to be with black women. That's why you find a black man who's been married, divorced, married, divorced. Then, then you turn around and say, "Well, fine, I'll start expanding my dating options." And here's the thing, I don't judge people by what they want. I just said, what's the likelihood of us, of you getting what you want? And I have, and it is far easier for a man to come to me and me say, "You know what? You need to get your money up. You, you need to get your mind right. You need to get your money up. You need to get your body right. You need to get all these things together. And then you can come back out here." And then men will be like, "All right, break. I'm gonna to come back and come back later." You tell women the same thing. You're shaming me.

Well, why can't I have this? Look, the first woman I talked to kept on asking, "Why, why, why?" Women don't. The women don't want to change because you've been told, "Take me as I am. I'm good enough." The women who call you, like, if you're not mentally stable, they don't, they don't even know who they are.

Okay, now, see, I can't do. I cannot allow you to do that. They don't. No, I cannot allow you to do that because you're basically saying that you see this is where we gonna have a problem because this is when you step in and say, "Those women are challenged." That's why I say you come after my audience, and that's wrong.

No, ma'am. No, ma'am. And I don't. That is not, that is not even close to being cool. You have made a psychological adjust. They got to be something wrong. Got to be wrong with them that they calling in for this. Uh, no, maybe just because you wouldn't do it. But there are a lot of things that you wouldn't do that somebody else would do. Say it ain't for you. Don't sit around and say there's something psychologically wrong with them.

I don't think that it's, it's for me. And I'm not trying to judge them. But I do think that you have to have some mental stability to handle some of your criticism. I think it could be damaging to a to a woman who is mentally un.

Some of them sound. What about what women do to men? I don't want no scrolls. Who, who is being, who being, who is who is more mentally and verbally abusive? Men or women?

You asking me? In my opinion? Yeah. Where's nuclear rejection come from? Is that a term that come from men to women or women to men?

I think men definitely.

And thank you. Thank you for proving what I said initially. Most problems with today with women is you don't know or understand men. You don't know them. So to say that you think men are more verbally and mentally abusive when you can see a woman who's five foot nothing cussing a 300 pound man out, "You son of a punk bit, you really."

I haven't seen that.

Okay. Our audience for th, for the, for us that live in the real world, whether you've seen it in person, you know it happens. You don't see men yelling at a woman because even, even if a man were to be like that, someone would step in. There are countless videos on YouTube where they have acting teams where men are being violent to a woman in a public place, and people swooping to help a woman. But when that woman's being violent, verbally violent to that man, people walk by.

Bottom line is this. I'm let me also say something too, because you said something about the people who call in can be damaged. Well, I assume that they are. If you're calling in asking for a high value man, you're productive, competitive, got your grease, and so forth, you should know, uh, where you stand. But I also, what's one of the main things I recommend everybody get counsel? Right. I've, I've heard you suggest that. Yeah. So my question is this, you've asked me 51 million questions run upside down one side the other. When are you going to start going to any of these black women on YouTube who give relationship advice and start asking them some of the same hard questions?

Oh, I definitely hold women accountable. You, but I said on YouTube, question that. But on YouTube, I have, I have not heard. I look through all the catalog on Let's Talk. I have not seen anybody else's name.

Well, let's, well, you know, we got to work on the questions. Maybe let's, let's, we'll work on that.

Well, well, well, but see, the thing is, they don't really exist. Black men are being asked to be perfect. And I reject the F. See, everybody else can, every other group of men are allowed to be fully human. Black men have to be damn near perfect and still ain't good enough. And even if I'm 2 plus 2 is four, where he's divorced. Bottom line is, it's getting results. People are getting what they.

Women have to be perfect. You guys are already saying you can't even have a kid. And you know that most black women do. So it's like, stop.

You right there. Was that child as a result of? Was that child as a result of forcible rape?

No, but it could be a result of marriage. Those are two different things. Those are two different things. A single mother has been divorced. But only one and four black women married. But if you come to me with another man's child, and I've been a stepfather, it's a horrible deal.

See, the fact of the matter is, you guys expect black men just to accept somebody else's du. Respect. You have, you have been around. Listen. Not listen. Nobody said about perfect, but it's just reasonable. Have you been around Chinese men? Asian men?

Yeah, I have.

Okay. I want you, when next time you're around Asian men, I want you to see how many Asian men ask them, "Would you accept a woman who has a child out of a single mother?" They'll laugh at you. Ask a middle eastern man. Black men are the men. See, what I don't think is many black women don't realize how lucky you are to have black men. Because by all the measures, black men make the most involved fathers and the best mates. That's why so many women from other cultures who have real patriarchies and real things going on, rush to try to get black men. Because we are more willing to listen to our women. But what do black men get for that? They've gotten larger women, who are more aggressive, less cooperative, and more kids. So you got, with a straight face, you can say that you should be able to come to a man who has had to work his ass off to put himself in the top 10% man, and think he should have to pay for another man's child who's not an asset to him. That's insane.

I think that you should consider other attributes that the woman have.

Yeah, like nurturing. She could. Okay, okay. Let's say that's true. And I also, I, I can find that with a woman without a kid. Because I got options.

You could. And the thing is, and the thing is, and see, that's the problem. To the problem is because that's what's happening because men who I talk to and deal with have options. Because they, all the women you're talking about that you should consider the other attributes, yeah, she's got a kid. You can find all these things in a woman who doesn't have a kid.

Well, I'm talking about longevity, right? I'm not talk.

Longevity. You got better. And who's the thing? The man gets to pick. And if he wants to pick the one with no kids, that's his choice. That is his choice.

But she chose to have a child, right? Because they're still single and looking. Excuse me. They're, they're not choosing because they're still, again, like I said, you're conflating stuff. Black men are more married than black women. And a few are others. The facts are St. It's a small percentage though.

You say it like small. 84,000 more marriages in a group of 40 million people. Are you serious? You have to look at the percentages. It's like a. Right. And as a percent. Okay, like it or not, you can, you can dance all around it. Black men, especially black men, Generation X, who have made it through the crack wars, Reaganomics, everything else, they're doing fine. You don't see black men complaining. What you see is women in the no man's land over 36, mad, angry, complaining.

Well, well, only 33% are still married. Let's just say that. And if it's three of them, they ain't, they ain't worried about it. I'm just saying they don't last. The longevity is not.

So what? So what? Let's talk about that. Let's talk about that. 52% divorce rate in America. It's high in the black community. But who files divorce rate? Who files divorce in the black community? The most. They say women. Is it true or false?

Let me tell you something, Kevin. I was divorced. And the reason I filed is because at that time, I didn't have income. And so it was beneficial to for me to file. So it's not always just because 80% just want to get a divorce. 80%. I'm saying 80%. Even if I gave you just leave no room. No, no, no. Listen. No. What I do is numbers are numbers. What I, let me finish. What I'm saying, even at 80%, even if I gave you that half of 80%, 40% are for the worst parts of the Bible. The worst stuff. He's beating you with kittens. I mean, the worst parts. He's sleeping with your sister. The worst parts. There's still four out of 10 broken families coming as a result of a black woman finally. It's still twice as many as men. The reality is black men want relationships. They want to be married to black women. They want to stay married to black women. And when they get married, they don't leave. Black women leave. And that's not the story that's been told to us my entire lifetime. We've been told that black men don't want to be married. They're having kids all over the place. When they make a certain amount of money, they marry white women. And I'm sorry, we have enough data.

Let's change that narrative for sure. Because that's not the only way you're gonna change that narrative. You change the women.

Right. Cuz the men aren't breaking the. See, call it divorce. Let's start calling it black women break their families.

I mean, not just women, though, Kevin. I feel like the men need to change as well.

I'm talking about marriages. You, you kept going into marriages not lasting. They don't last because women leave. It's not just women. Eight out of 10 times, it's women. It takes two. Eight out of 10 times, it's women. You're a smart woman. Do you work on the eight or do you work on the two?

You're a smart woman. Which one do you do?

I, I love your analytical skills. But I do believe it's true. It's eight out of 10.

See, I don't believe that. You lie. You're it's very limited. And that's my problem. Eight over here, two over here. I don't hate you, Kevin. I don't hate you. I hear you. You have no reason to hate me because it's the truth. See, the thing is, you know it's the truth. It's just that this sisterhood, this beef for women, and the, and the, and your emotion over over logic and reason is so strong. And this is why our commun.

I think I'm being logical. I'm not being emotional at all.

Well, a, okay. But I asked you, yes, in the marriages that happen, because you don't have enough of them, let's take that. Black women are the least to be married in the entire world. But why are you divorcing? Why are you twice as likely to file for divorces? You will to be married. You file for divorces at twice the marriage rate. If that's the case, and everybody knows you're least likely to be married, you should want to fight. Because you see, based on your woman and man ratio, we don't have enough men to marry anyway. So we need.

There are not enough men. See, that won't work either. Because on the planet, there are always more females than men. If every man married every woman, if every man available married every woman, there'd still be millions of women left. See, you can't keep moving the goalpost without dealing with.

Let me ask you this. Do they consider, um, like homos, like in that number? Is homosexuality considered, right? Because, you know, everybody's not heterosexual. So is all these, right? What do you mean then? What number? The number you're saying of available bachelors, right? Or men. So in these high value men, right? How many of them are actually heterosexual looking?

There's no. There's no. Okay. There's not a.

Large, the same, the percentage is the same. There's not more gay high-value black men than there are gay by value white men. No, I'm just saying in general. How do we know what the pool is like? Okay, the point is, again, cart before the horse. You're looking for an argument. I'm not looking for an argument. Yes, you are, because what's that? What's the number? And let's say that it was, let's say it's 20%, which is ridiculous. Has close to probably about three or five. There's the same amount of gay men everywhere. The number doesn't change with income and education and status. Well, for us, it lessens the pool even more. The pool is not. Okay, first of all, first of all, the pool is not lessened by the availability of men. The pool is lessened by the availability of fit women, and that's where you and I differ. You keep going. I don't agree with that argument. Well, but ask the men. Well, our foundations are opposite. Ask. Well, your foundations are, your foundations are to tell women what makes them feel good. Ask the men. You ask the customer. My foundation is based on my personal. You ask the customer. Relationship. Okay, fine. You ask the customer why they're not buying the product. You don't chastise them for not buying the product. I agree. Ask them. Okay. And when, and when have black women ever really sat down collectively and asked black men what they want? Well, we need to have that conversation. I mean, I think we need to have it. Black men have been screaming it from my entire lifetime. Be me. I think that we have asked. Actually, not that I'm thinking about it, I think, I think that we have asked. Okay. If you've asked, okay, then, then are they giving it? Black men, cuz black men just want you to be cooperative, fit in your own hair. I'm asking you these, these, these questions and, and you know, opposite of what they're asking for is, are these characteristics going to really sustain them? And you keep, you keep moving down the path, you keep trying to go down the path. You got to get in a relationship before you can talk about sustenance, right? And they can't get them. They can't get them because cooperation, fitness, hair, add in kid. You keep, you keep. And see why you keep trying to go down the path is because if you don't stay, if you stay here, they're missing out on good women. No, that, that's your presumption. So your presumption, see what you keep going back to sub. That's the real. Okay, whatever. And the truth of the matter is, black women are dying alone, and so are black men, because they can't find black. No, black men aren't, and they're not complaining about it. You know, they're not complaining because men have been taught not to even express their emotion. It ain't got nothing to do with them not, whatever. See, this, see, we keep going back in, we keep going back around to this. You keep telling men who they are and what they are. I don't know how many. I'm not telling them how to be a man, but I'm. No, no, you keep, you keep, you keep. What I know. Well, no, but what you know from your female point of view. No, I know from men's mouths. The limited amount of men you know. Again, I asked you how many men. And the few men you know, and you even had a man on the panel who's actually even had to moderate. Ma'am, see, this is why I said to the first woman, when do y'all really just sit down and get quiet and listen to the men? When do y'all just back down and say, yes? Well, I think I've listened to you. No, no, as a group, as a group though, when do black women ever just sit down, be quiet, listen, and give men what they're asking for? I do all the time. I guess that's why I have a man. Exactly. Okay. Well, but I said, there's a group though. I mean, it needs to happen. But why doesn't it? You know, every other culture, this is just my opinion, every other culture has a patriarchal, you know, society. And black people, we had the opposite where women were, um, you know, given housing and told to, you know, get the man out the home and, and giving financial security without having a man in the house. So like, we have to rebuild and change the perception of that. In order to. Ask a question, but I ask, why don't they give men what they want? Because it's, it's not a pat. It wasn't a patriarchal society for black people for so long. And maybe we need to kind of restructure. About how about this? Before 1965, we were married at a rate of 80% in the worst part of Jim Crow segregation. Everything black folks know how to be married. See, back then though, black women still thought when you said black, black women saw themselves as us. Now, black women for the most part, see yourself separate from us in many cases. Better. There's a low-level lack of contempt and lack of respect for the average black woman to the average black male image. So why do black women not give black men what they want? Because they don't have respect for black men. That's why. You can have women come on to this platform, and I'm a 50-year-old man, and they talk to me at 20 years old like I'm their age. Yeah. Would I? And I would never do that to you. But my. And the thing is, but who did it hurt? It definitely hurt me. Right. And the thing is, other groups see this. See, what, what black women are doing is not working because it's not as though you're not giving black men what they want because they got a bill with con. Before I submit to them, okay. All right. So black men took all those L's and the crack years and came back and did something. Said, okay, now here we are. And they. Well, you can't get that. All right. You can't, you still ain't going to submit. Still ain't going to cooperate. All right. But who are you submitting or cooperating to? Because Brad Lee, Amed, and Enrique ain't coming over to marry black women either. You know what? I will say that your Tommy, your Tommy Lauren depiction of like, that was a clearer picture of what you mean by, you know, cooperation and women just, you know, being able to apologize and humble and, and, you know, and work with black men. So I think maybe like if people saw that, they would understand. I mean, the, the things I've said, the woman I had the conversation with wasn't triggered. The women, the women I've talked to. But then I got women calling me, you're a [ __ ], you're this, that. You got women who are, who are, who are seem like they almost want to bust a blood vessel, and they don't know me. But the fact that a black man is just having to stand on something that most other black men are saying, the notion is, who are you? Get back in your place. And I am sorry. We may have not had a patriarchy where we had our own land, but we did know how to do this. We had ourselves a community and a family. And the first. I've said, I've asked this question before, it's broken. It's broken. Our grandparents and our great-grandparents under all this racism and white supremacy had something. It's broken. Who needs to come back to the table first? Black men or black women? We got to do it collectively. I don't think we need to keep separated. That's the problem. That's where, and that's, and that's where you are going to. That's the problem because black men never left the table. Black women did. I don't believe black women. I don't think so. Okay. Well, then where you at? Not you. Where you at? Where your husband's saying? Where are, where are you at? Because I'm going out to Papa tomorrow, and I guarantee you, I will see a big mama with her daughters and her daughters with kids and a bunch of kids. I'll, I'll take pictures and I will show you 10, 12 women and, and kids around Atlanta anytime I go out. I see groups of women. Where are your men at? I go to La Belle Epoque, and there's white couples and groups and everything else. Everybody else. Black women are there, and the only man that's there is their gay makeup artist or hair stylist. No shade to them, but where your Kevin? I have two children, you know, and I keep myself fit. So. But are you, are you the norm or you the exception from the fitness? What do you think? Have you think I'm the exception? I said, are you the norm for fitness or you the exception? I'm asking what you think. I mean, because I thought that I represent. You said you're fit. You're the, you're the exception because I have women who come over here, non-black women, who married with four kids, doctor, went to the Mayo Clinic, married to a guy who makes a tenth of to what she makes, and she's submissive to him, right? The average black man makes 42, 41,000. Average white man makes 52. There's $111,000 difference between the average black man and white man in income in this country. But there's not, there's more than $111,000 difference on the treatment, the way the average black man and white black man gets treated by his woman. And people see that. People see that now. Like, how do you put up with? Ain't nobody rushing to marry black women. We are all you got. But see, this is the thing too, Kevin. People hear your perception of black women, and that is also troubling. Also TR. I am sorry. Before they hear my perception of the truth, they see you in HR, customer service. They see you. Where do they put black women in companies? They put black women in companies to H to to defend their money. They take that strong independent attitude. HR, customer service, collections. They weaponize your sass to protect their profits. And women have taken that and instead of saying, you know what, I'm a worker. A man, you're more married to the white structure than you are of your black men. So don't say, don't say when people hear my depiction because, uh, I'm just saying, I'm talking to women and hearing what they're saying. I'm not depicting anyway. I'm having conversations real time, unedited, and people can make their own decisions. But then I also have a conversation with women yesterday with the woman's face I blurred out. Did you watch that? No, I didn't see that one. Did you watch the conversation where I, when I told told a woman she's in tears, go back to your husband? How many marriages have I fixed or resolved? How many times? Thank you. But you don't, but that's not sensational. It's all you just bad and you bash and such and so forth. And it's easy for you to believe that about black men because, not maybe not you, but most black men don't think black men are [ __ ] anyway. So all you got to do is give them something bad, and it's quicker to believe that. Don't matter how many videos are out there. It's all there. I will admit that I did more research, you know, because I wanted to stick to the topic and, and I followed your rules, you know, I wanted to have a dialogue and learn something, you know. So, um, that is what I did. I did watch more videos. I mean, I still disagree with the ranking, but, you know, I do understand your reasoning. But I don't. I disagree with it. Why? Because you, you gonna rank them anyway on the surface level. So don't even set women up to rank. Don't do that. Hold on, hold on. Why do you disagree with rankings? I just told you. I feel like you, they don't consider the whole entire woman. Like, you're pretty much shrinking them down to no their physical character. No, that's the starting point. I mean, ma'am, understand, do you not realize, do you think your looks have played any any role in your in your success in life? Yes or no? And, and see, what I do is I acknowledge that to be, to be true. That's why we have Miss America and Miss Universe, the homecoming queen. That's why you have to have a certain height and a certain look to be a model. Yeah. And when you put, uh, Tess Holliday or Gabrielle Union on on the cover of something to try to force it down people's throat, they say no. But it's just problematic to compare women to those women because that's not real, right? Like compare women to what women? Fitness model? Like, come on now. You can't. You gonna compare? You know, an. Compare black women to. I compare black. You know why I compare black women to black women? What is my major comparison to black women? I take black women a day and I compare them against black women in the '70s, Pam Grier, them on Good Times. And I tell you, go look in your family, go look in your family album. That's how you're supposed to look. I don't compare them. See, y'all, y'all keep trying to make me be something I'm not. Pam in the 1970s was a shapely Coke bottle shaped woman. What dress size was she? Eight. I don't know. Okay. Yeah. All right. Eight. All that body. Eight. Thma dress size six. Go to, go watch Soul Train reruns. That's how you're supposed to look. So I'm not sitting there saying you got to look like Bo Derek or white women. That's another talking point to just say, you know what, to invalidate what a black man is saying. Why do so many? Why? Why do you think it's so easy for black women to invalidate what a black man is saying? Because, you know, we don't, I mean, essentially black women, you know, they are in power, they are in positions to support themselves, right? So men don't control their wealth or access. So I think, you know, it could be easy for you to, you know, not really have respect for that. I mean, I'm not saying that that's cool. I'm just telling you this is a, and if, and the fact of the matter is, every other group knows that. Yeah. So honestly, I don't need. We talk about racism, white supremacy, and all these things, and these things exist. But more than I've ever been damaged by that system, I've had far more damage from the person that shares the bed with me. And that is not. I mean, you, you may not like Donald Trump, but white women voted for Donald Trump because they knew that regardless if they were feminist or womanist or whatever, that who is they have to raise their sons to run these companies and organizations? Are black women raising their boys to be in positions of power? They read at a fourth-grade level. They're more concerned that their boys are cute with the latest J's. But are they put them in the trade classes? Uh, put them in in foreign languages, science, engineering, technology, math? Forget the men. What are you doing with your boys? And see, all the stuff that I talk about that never gets heard about the scholarship I'm about to put out and the internships that coming out of my pocket. But all they want to talk about is how you talk about black women. Well, this year I've said I'm tired of doing that. Put it on the wood. Show me people who are getting better outcomes and results from that platform and their work. And all I've heard is, all right, man, we gonna get on to the next part. Okay. Appreciate it very much, man. This episode, this is a long one. And quite frankly, it was so many things I could tackle in this one, right? But all in all, I know this was a respected person, um, that Kevin knew, and that's clearly why she was able to come on here and, and spew a lot of nonsense. But, you know, all in all, I still think she was a bit disingenuous when it came down to the answers and the plight of of men in general, not just black men, but men. These are things that should be easily identified and picked up on. But all in all, still something that we can teach and show other people. Let me know what you think. Leave it in the comment section down below. Make sure you guys like and subscribe if you guys haven't already. Turn on post notifications so you will be alerted when we upload more videos just like this one. I'll see you guys in the next video. Peace.