Transcription
So, we're interviewing here with Sarah. I was a part of our pit stop in CCM. And you know, the last time that we talked, Sarah, I was really very impressed with how you said, "I was homeless, too." And I, you know, you talked to people on the streets and like, "If I got myself out on the streets, you can get yourself out." And I think that's very, very important. Um, that people could see the possibility because a lot of them, you know, have lost hope. So, you know, tell us a little bit about your story, like how did you get yourself out of it? I needed. I'm walking the park.
Well, when I first came down here, like five years ago, like I got said, like a few months before COVID came, and I didn't think anything like it was going to be like this, you know? I never expected to be homeless. I never expected to like be struggling.
What brought you to Los Angeles?
Uh, family issues. Okay. Like me and my family, we weren't on good terms. And then I stayed with one of my family's friends. We had a fallout, and then I went and called one of my friends who lived here and told me that he had his own spot and I could stay with him, which kind of was a total lie because I should have known, 'cause one of my friends that brought me here, he was a very compulsive liar, and we knew each other since first grade.
Oh. So that's the reason why I came out here because I couldn't go back to where my where my family was staying at. I couldn't be there. So I had no choice to come here. And at first I didn't really think of it, you know, but when I actually came here and went into the shelter at the Union Rescue Mission, it was bad. I've never seen something like this in my life because where where I grew up, I always had a roof over my head. I always got food, shower, everything. I come here, it was it was a struggle. It was so bad staying in the shelter with different type of people, drug induced people, alcoholics. It was It was bad. It was like so bad.
How long did it take you to like get back on your feet?
It took a while because I didn't really know much about California or where I was supposed to start because it's different from here than my old states.
Where is your state?
Uh, Florida.
So, it's it's different. So, coming out here, I have to like get a license. I have to try like get a job, like where I'm supposed to like go. It was it was bad because it was it was a struggle, you know. I came...
Were there moments you lost hope?
Oh, yeah. Like, yeah. Every day because I was like, like what could I have done different where I could have stayed back in Florida, had the perfect life that I was living? Like what could I what could I have done different so I won't be like out here like this? Oh, yeah. I lost hope so many times. Like I felt worthless. I feel like, you know, I I couldn't do this 'cause this is not my life. But walking around California, seeing all this, it felt I felt really bad because I don't know how people could live like this.
And then I'm stuck in a shelter, you know, I have to abide by the rules.
I got to come in at a curfew. Like I couldn't do what I want. So, so in a situation where you're in that place, how do you find people the way they treat you?
I mean, at first I was angry at the way that people treated me because in my mind it's like, "You don't even know me. Like, you don't even know my story." It's like, "Why you being mean?" I don't know you, but I'm going to try to be respectful.
And is this when you talk about this, are these the people that are in the system that's supposed to help you whether fill out a form or get a job or things like that?
Well, like some of the workers there, they're nice. Some of them like they aren't because I feel like when I was there, they were always like pushing, pushing, pushing, like, "You got to get a job. You only can stay here for a certain amount of time, you know? You got to find work." It's like, "Try to go to school, get a job, like do something," you know.
Was there mental health already being addressed at that time?
Uh, I like I met the therapist, but I'm pretty sure that they like they did had it, but at the time I wasn't really that...
If you look back to the days where you were trying to find your way around getting out of homelessness, could you remember one person that sticks out that you felt connected with or it's just like random people every day?
It was like random people every day, you know, because I met like a few people when I was in the shelter and they really wanted to get out, but they felt trapped. They they didn't know where to go. Yeah. They didn't know where to go. And the people that were supposed to help them, they didn't help them at all. And they felt really bad, you know. And then it makes me wonder because when I was there trying to get help, they were like kind of rude. I feel like they favoritism certain people. Like for instance, if you're a mother and you have three kids, they rather help the mother and the kids, right? And then helping somebody like me or like him or him. It's like bunch of like favoritism. So it was it was hard.
It was it was hard. So, how did you get out of it?
I told myself that this is not the life that I wanted to live. So, I used all the resources that I could have get. I ended up getting my guard card. I ended up did, um, doing security. I did that for like a couple of months. I, uh, volunteered at the downtown women center. I did that.
Uh, like those are the two jobs. But it's fighting for it.
It was hard. It was It was not easy because constantly I had to like keep going, keep going, keep going. And no matter how many applications I did, nobody called back. Nobody. Like, and I was losing hope, you know. And I didn't want to keep staying in the shelter like this. Then I got kicked out of the URM because my ex-friend lied and said some things. So, I had a restraining order and we couldn't be living in the same shelter.
Now, I was really homeless. I was sleeping on the street at the m at the midnight mission, sleeping on the ground full of different females and there like rats and roaches. It was it was bad. And I was like, even though I knew my friend was like that, but I never like thought that this was somebody that I grew up with together, like brother and sister, right?
So after that, I was like, you know, "I can't do this. I can't I can't do this." So I ended up going to the wine guard every morning trying to see if they got a room available. And you know, my luck, my hope was really running out because I went back like five times and the last time I went, they didn't had no beds. So I was like, "Okay, thank you." I walked out the door, one of the ladies was like, "Sarah, Sarah, we got a bed open." So I was like, I was like, "Wow."
Yeah. I, I, I was like, I was like,
"How long did that bed last?"
I stayed there until I got, I stayed there until I got my, um, emergency voucher.
Okay.
So, while I was, while I was, um, all right. While I was there,
a wine guard,
at the wine guard, I was doing security. So, I was making income and all that.
Okay.
And like I used to give some of my money that I made to my case worker so they can have it. So when I'm ready to move out and get my voucher, they'll give me the money and and all that. So I stayed at the wine guard for like maybe like two and a half years.
Wow.
Took that long to get back on your feet.
Took me like I stayed there for two and a half years. Got my emergency voucher. I packed my stuff and I moved in at the at the seesaw, which is not a good place to live. It's it's it's bad. But it was my own spot. My rent was very cheap. So,
like how much per month?
Like it was $66. So,
that's so good.
So it was good.
Yeah. Get a job.
But I tell people when they, when, when they keep coming up and they ask questions, I tell them it's like, "If you really want to get out of here, you could do it." There is so much resource on Skid Row. They ain't going to deny you. They're not. They, they want, they're going to help you. And I see them all the time coming around giving out vouchers, you know,
but, you know, sometimes when I look at it, it is drug induced because sometimes, like, once you hit that drug, it's like your mind is somewhere else. You don't want to get out of here. You stuck because right here I can feel my high. I can get high. Nobody can tell me nothing. I can get drunk. Nobody's gonna say nothing. But I tell them, I was like, "If you really want to get out of here, have your own spot. No curfew, no nothing." Like there's a lot of resources. But it's hard down here. I, I seen people like break down, like cry because they don't know what to do. Like they stuck.
But it's people like you who says, "I got out of it. You can too."
Yeah. Because all that time when I was feeling hopeless, I was feeling doubtful. Times when I was feeling suicidal, like when my depression was really at its peak, they put me on medication and all that. But I got out of it,
you know. I got out of it. And honestly, I have to thank God because I couldn't do it by myself, and he has to be the one that that was guiding me on what I had to do. So I thank him for that, truly.
So, having this job in pit stop, I know someone tells you you got an easy job and you're like, "Heck no."
It's not easy. But what what does it give you?
She got what?
Get her out.
I got to take care of this. Hold on. Hold on. Hold on. Hold on. Hold on. Hold on. She ain't nobody.
I know, but you got somebody looking at her. Come on. But,
It's the rules. You can't have two people in here.
See what I mean?
You show her. That was rude. You could have opened it a little bit. You got him looking at her. Come on now. I'm sorry.