Transcription
Friends, I told you that my partner would be here, and here he is. Didn't expect him, did you? Now, he always shapes up. Now, why not let the folks themselves ask for something that they like to hear? All right, what would they like to hear? Something different. Now, is there anything special that you would like to hear us do? Baseball? Oh, no. Oh, no, no, no. Wait a minute, friends. You don't want to hear that, do you? Yeah, we got the props for you here. Oh, you came prepared, didn't you? All set.
HH. Well, this is a must, I guess. It's a must. We've got to do it. Well, I'll tell, let me see that. Looks all right. Okay, we pretend. We'll just, all right. I'll take it easy with that. We'll just pretend that, uh, we're organizing a baseball team here at the retired actors' home, and I am the manager.
Now, you're going to be the manager of the retired actors' baseball team? Yes. I would like to join the retired actors' baseball team. Oh, you would. And I would like to know some of the guys' names on the team, so if I want to play with them, I'll know them. I meet them on the street or in a home here, I can say hello to them. Oh, sure. But, you know, they give baseball players nowadays very peculiar names. You know, a lot of funny names. You know, like Sticky Fields, Sticky Fields, Goofy Dan, Booby Barber, Booby Barber. I know all. Well, let's see now. We have on our team, we have, who's on first? What's on second? I don't know. Who's on third? That's what I want to find out. The guy's names. And that's what I want to find out. The guy's names. I'm telling you, who's on first? What's on second? I don't know. Who's on third?
Now, you got to be the manager of the baseball team. Yes. You know the guys' names? Well, I should. Well, you tell me the guys' names on the baseball team. I say, who's on first? What's on second? I don't know. Who's on third. You ain't said nothing to me yet. Go ahead and tell me. I'm telling him. You ain't said nothing yet. Go ahead and tell me. Who's on first? What's on second? I don't know. Is on third. You know the guy's names on the baseball team? Well, go ahead. Who's on first? Yes. I mean, the guy's name. Who the guy playing first? Who the guy playing first base? Who the guy first base? Who is on first? What are you asking me for? I don't know. I'm asking you. Who's on first? That's his name. Go ahead and tell me. Who the guy first? That's it. That's his name. Well, you ain't said nothing. I ain't ask you nothing. You did. You know the guy's name at first base? Tell me the guy's name on first base. Who the guy playing first base? Who is on first? Lou, what he asking me for? I don't get excited. I'm saying, who? I'm asking you a simple question. Who's that first? Yes. Well, go ahead and tell me. That's who I'm asking you. What's the guy's name on first B? Oh, no. What's on second? I'm not asking you who's on second. Who's on first? One base at a time. Now, don't mix up my. I'm not mixing up anybody. Now, what's the guy's name on first base? Now, what is on second? I'm not asking you who's on second. Who is on first? I don't know. He's on third. We're not talking. Wait a minute. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. How did I? How did I get on third base? You mentioned his name. I mentioned his name. Yes. I don't know anybody's name on the team. I, how could I mention a guy's name? You did. You just mentioned it. All right. What's the guy's name on third base? No. What's on second? Who's on second? Who's on first? I don't know. He's on. See me. I didn't even mention a guy's name on third base. Yes, you did. All right, then. Who's playing third base? No. Who's on first? I'm not asking you what's on first. What's on second? Who's on second? Who's on first? I don't know. He's Third Base. I don't know anybody on a baseball team. You do. You mention their names. I do. Sure. You got to Lou. Feel. Naturally. Left F. His name. Why? I just thought I'd ask you. I just thought I'd ask you. Well, I just thought I'd tell you. Go ahead. Tell me. Tell you what? Well, I feel his name. Why? Because I want to know. Because. Oh, he's Centerfield. You know these plays as well. Who's in Centerfield? Now, who's on first? What's on first? I don't know. Third. [Laughter] B. Do you know the guy's names on the team? Look, Lou, you don't seem to understand. See, I have a first baseman. You. I know you got a first. I asked you what's. What's the first? I ask you what's the first baseman's name. No. What's the second baseman? I, I'm going to stop asking you. So I ask you, what's the first baseman's name? What's the second baseman? I don't even get past the. All right. Who's on second? Who's on first? What base do you want to talk about? You talk about anyone you want to talk about. All right. Now, who's our first? Right. Okay. All right. You got a first baseman. When you pay off the first baseman every month, who gets the money? Every dollar. Who gets? Sometimes his wife comes down and collects it. Whose wife? Yes. Why not? Lou, he's earned it. Who did? [Laughter] Yeah. Look, will you pay off the first baseman every month? You get a receipt from the guy? Sure. How does he sign his name? Who the guy you give the money to? Who you give the money? Well, that's how he signs him. That's how who signs him? Go ahead, tell me. That's it. Who? Who? Look, you go to first baseman. Yes. And you say to him, here's your money. Sign a receipt. How does he sign his name? Who the guy you give the money to? That's how he signed. That's how who signed? Yeah. Sure. You got to get a receipt from the guy. You get one. Lou, how does the guy in first base sign his name? Who the guy in first? I'm asking. When you give the guy the money, what's the guy's name that you give the money to? Now, wait a minute. What signs his own? Who signs his own? No. Who signs his? I mean, what's the guy's name on first? You. What is on second? I'm not asking you. Who's who's first? I don't know. Third Base. The field's name. The center field. I don't know if you got a pitcher. That team. Well, this be a fine team without a pitcher. It's a fine team with the pitcher's name tomorrow. You know, I can't change that name. You know what? Tell me today. I'm telling you. Go ahead. Tell me the pitcher name tomorrow. Why not tell me today? I, then tell me the pitcher's name tomorrow. All right. What time tomorrow? You tell me the pitcher's name. What time? What? What time tomorrow? You're going to tell me who's pitching? Who is not pitching? I'll break you around here. Say, who's not? I want to know. What's the pitcher's name? What's on second? I don't know. Third Base. Third Base. Third Base. You got a catcher? Certainly. You got a catcher on a baseball team. Catcher's name today. Today's fishing. Today's catch. Now you got it. Now I got it. All I got. We got a couple of days on a team. That's all. I can't help that, Lou. I don't. You know, Happ. I'm a pretty good catcher myself. That's so they tell me. Yeah. Now, I get behind a plane. I'm going to do some fancy catching. And tomorrow, finding my team right now. Tomorrow, he winds up the ball. And I'm behind the plate. And a heavy hitter gets up. That heavy hitter gets up. And he's ready to hit the ball. And Tomorrow's going to throw the ball. I'm to catch it. Now, when Tomorrow throws the ball, the guy that bunts the ball. Now, when he bunts the ball, me being a good catcher, I want to throw the guy out of first base. So I pick up the ball to throw it. The ho. Now, that's the first thing you've said right. I don't even know what I'm talking about. That's all you have to do. It's the throw up ball of first base. Now, who's got it? Naturally. Sure. The guy is running the first base. I want to throw the guy out. So I throw the ball to who? Naturally. Throw it to who? Naturally. Who's got it? Naturally. So I pick up the ball and I throw it to. Naturally. I know you throw the ball of first SP. Then who gets it? Naturally. That's. Now the same thing. I pick up the boss. So I throw it the natural. I throw it the who? Natural. That's what I'm saying. I said I throw it both to who? Naturally. You ask me. You throw the ball to who? Naturally. Same as you. I throw the ball to. Natural. You don't. You throw it to who? Now, who's got it? Naturally. That's what I said. Whoever it is, better get it. That's all. I don't worry about who. Who get it. He better get it. All right. Now, I throw the ball to whoever it is. Drops the ball. So the guy runs a second. Who picks up the ball and throws the? What? What throws? I don't know. I don't know. Throws it back to Tomorrow. Triple play. Could be another guy gets up. And it's a long fly ball to be caused. Why? I don't know. He's on third. And I don't give a d. I said I don't give a d. Oh, that's our shortstop. Happ.