Transcription
In the next few years, you're going to see many articles like this, which is a revelation and a kind of understanding and coming to terms with the phenomenon of the aging millennial girl boss American left-wing woman and the fact that she can't find a husband despite the fact she does actually want one.
Because you can propagandize people in all sorts of ways and you can tell them actually it is good to be x y or zed and they can come to believe it. But in fact people are designed to live in certain ways and so you have longings implanted in you by nature. You have things that you desire. And so you may be living this perfect liberal life but you still don't feel like you have it all. You still don't feel like you have actually what you want and you are looking for something even then.
And so this is why this article is possible. This is why The Guardian is able to interview and they they claim they interviewed hundreds of uh women for this article which is remarkable. A re like a really large number all things considered. But anyway, they they say by 2030, 45% of prime working age women in the US, defined as women between 25 and 44, will be single, according to Census Bureau historical data and Morgan Stanley forecasts.
Hundreds of those women from across the US shared with the Guardian why they were single and how they felt about it and what they would be looking for in a future partner if they were still in the market for being for one. So, you have Sarah 43. She says, "I hated being single after my last relationship broke down. I miss having someone to cook for, to share things with. But now my motto motto is my alone feels so good. I'll only have you if your presence is sweeter than my solitude."
Well, that's the choice you're going to make because you're expecting what is essentially a unicorn to walk through the door because really, and this is a this is a perennial issue through this article as we go through it, they they aren't actually looking for a partner. What they're looking for is kind of an ornament. Uh someone who will they they've got all of their uh passions and desires satiated except for the longing to be with someone else except for the longing for companionship. And yet they they address the idea of companionship as something that can be siloed away and compartmentalized as an aspect of their life that fails to understand actually how you get to that point. Like the idea that you're alone feels so good. So you want to add someone to that because you don't want to lose that. You failed to understand what the nature of a relationship is. Actually, your previous life is gone. When you actually want to build a life with someone, that old life is gone. You don't have anymore. But you have something else. And it's a negotiation and a constant um a constant uh I don't say work. I don't want to say project either. It's not really it's not it's not really summarizing it correctly, but it's it's a a constant process of development together until you realize that actually being away from it is worse than being with it, right? The this the the idea of being away from it is like losing a part of yourself because it has grown around your soul into the thing that you are on a day-to-day basis. But you've done the opposite. You found yourself a beautiful ivory tower and you've got all sorts of provisos on whether someone could join you in that. And the answer is probably not. You probably won't find anyone like that.
But anyway, they say many of the responses were surprisingly similar. The most frequently listed qualities women said they were looking for in a partner were kindness and emotional intelligence, mental and physical health, shared values, ambition, and being hardworking, financial stability, masculinity, and maturity, and a willingness to commit to an equal monogous relationship, as well in many cases having a family.
So you can see here the leftism and how it's imposed upon the biological desires of women as women as as animals. Um the monogous relationship and having a family is something that and remember these are all leftwing women as well. Outside of leftwing circles these are very easy for women to find actually. Uh loads and loads and loads and loads and loads and loads and loads of women have monogous relationships and families, but the willingness to commit as an equal. Oh, well, that's not really what I was after. I was after a wife, which I wouldn't say is equal to a husband. I'm not saying it's inferior. I'm saying it's different. It's qualitatively different in a way that you don't you don't I don't measure superiority or inferiority with my wife. I have a role. She has a role and together we fulfill the function of a family. So it's it's one of those things where it's like look if you're going to put an ideological value on the thing well then suddenly I can measure that right? If I don't feel like I'm an equal then why would I do that? I mean you know my wife doesn't work. I pay for everything and so am I going to be like well you're not contributing as an equal or am I going to understand that there are things that are beyond monetary value that she contributes like this is this is a a very common and I think very mistaken way of looking at these things.
One of the phrases respondents used the most was that they were looking for a partner capable of adding to or enhancing their life as in someone who is entirely self-sufficient and capable of adding romance children or unique intellectual connection to their lives. A large number of women complained about past suitors who had been lacking effort or unable to keep up. And isn't that fascinating? Yeah, I'd like a a husband. I'd like to start a family. It's like, but I don't want to give up my life as a single girl boss career woman. It's like then you don't want a husband and a family. You don't understand. These things are not compatible. You will not be the single girl boss career woman who has got her entire life properly arranged, neatly laid out as she likes. and just add these things to it just to make it complete. Just to make it so that that deepest part of your soul that is longing for the authentic human experience of a woman, you can't just add that. You can't just insert that into this perfect modern life that you've created for yourself. So, you're not going to get it. And loads of these women are just like, "Well, I just can't find it."
We'll go through some examples. Babette is a butician from New York City echoed hundreds of other respondents across ages and socioeconomic backgrounds. "I would love to have a partner but it seems like men are super low effort. Why do they need to be high effort? I mean they can find apparently there are lots of women available. They don't respond on dating apps. Blah blah blah." I I'm not happy with the quality of the men is what she's saying. Uh a lot of men seem to actively make life worse for women instead of better. Well, again, you are not prepared to leave your life and commit to a new life with someone else. You think you can just graft on a husband to the existing life that you have, but that puts him in an inferior position, frankly, and you're looking for at least an equal, if not a superior, which they'll explain to us later on in this article. And so no wonder you're not finding men of any substantive quality. The only kind of men who would want to be grafted on to the life of a successful woman are [ __ ] losers. You've pos you've put your pos yourself in the position of being the husband. And so you're like, "Okay, why am I why why can't I find any good men who want to be wives?" It's like, well, because good men tend not to want to be wives.
Anyway, uh she Kelly from Georgia says, "I wish I could have met my person before the stupid gender wars. Social media and red pill rhetoric has ruined people's view of dating and marriage." Schools of women said that nobody available they they'd encountered met what they considered basic requirements. Okay. Well, let's have a look at these basic requirements. Bear in mind you're in your 40s. "I'm looking for a man who has goals and ambition, is intelligent, trustworthy, a provider, supportive, considerate, kind, assertive, masculine, honest, faithful, intentional, has a healthy self-esteem and a sense of humor, loves to go out, likes fitness. These basic qualities are hard to find these days."
Well, I mean, you say these are basic qualities, but this is a very, and I hate to say high value, but this is this is someone who has many options, right? And if he has many options, why would he want a 43y old woman? I mean, that's that's not a young lady anymore. She's coming to the very end of possibly being able to have children. Why would he go for you? And so really you can say I'm looking for this. It's like sure I'm looking for I'm not obviously but if I were if I were made single tomorrow through whatever fate I'd be like yeah I'm looking for Sydney Sweeney and I expect her to turn up and these these are basic qualities being absolutely you know blonde babe or whatever. And it's like these are not basic qualities. You are looking for a a a very hard to find person and you don't seem to have considered that actually by the time you get to your 40s. You've got some baggage. You've got like things about you that are perhaps not great habits or that you have a history. These basic qualities are basically just a wish list.
And so they say although many women found being single lonely, they typically said they would not consider anyone who did not tick these or similar boxes. So again, they think of themselves as being very high value and they probably are. Two single women. These these women who have made their careers, they've bought their houses. They're they're they're very um well situated in life are very attractive to women if they were to be husbands, but they themselves are fulfilling the role of the husband and therefore are not able to find a wife.
Katie is a biotechnology product manager from Wisconsin. "Why? What's the point of you being a biotechnology product manager? A partner should ideally have a robust social life and focus on holistic health, compassion and forthright communication skills and functional independence." What you mean functional independence? Like this is crazy. Like just to be clear, I am not independent of my wife. My wife is not independent of me. We are a family. We have kids. We have people who are dependent on us. Like the idea that you can be like, "Yeah, I'm looking for someone with functional independence." So then you're not looking for a relationship. You don't know what you're asking for and you don't know what it is that you're you don't know why you're not finding it. Right? This is mental. This is nonsense. And again, it kind of sounds I'm looking for someone with a robust social life, focused on holistic health. This sounds like sort of thing a teenager would say or someone in their 20ies would say. Like this is this is not someone who wants to actually settle down and become the partner of someone else. And again like the this is a like just a list of a wish list, right?
These wish lists are another interesting thing because what you're doing is essentially commodifying the people that you are looking to date. And so you're not thinking of that person as the kind of unique named individual that they are. The person that you could you would for so for whatever reason you find them enchanting and you can't stop thinking about them. You can't get them out of your mind and romantically. You can't think romantically about a series of categories. You can't think romantically about things that are enumerated and again commodified instead of actually thinking about Frank or whatever you know Michael you know whoever whoever that guy was that turned your head and you had a a bit of a flirtatious conversation with and these women don't seem to have that capacity to romantically link to a particular individual man because he is him and there's something about him that drives them, you know, that that that gets in your mind. Like with men with women, frankly, you know, obviously men like there are just certain women in your life that you'll not be able to forget for some reason and you don't understand why. You don't have a series of enumerated lists. It's just for some reason she was the one. And these women have no conception of that. They're like, "No, I have a list of requirements to fit into my busy life that I'm looking for, and I don't really care who he is. All I care is that he has these attributes." And it's like, again, that's not how romance works. That's not how love works. That's not how human interactions work. I mean, it might be how a biotechnology product manager works, but that's that's not how normal human beings are.
And she says, "I'm happy to compromise on things. The bar is extremely low, and yet it's rarely clear." It's like, well, I don't feel like you're in love with me, Katie. Like, that's the thing. I don't feel like you are open to us making a life together, and I'm not really happy to be the kind of pet in your life that fulfills certain criteria. That's not what I'm looking for, frankly.
They carry on. Hundreds reported struggling to find a partner with shared values, political views and interests, similar education level, with many pointing to a deepening mismatch between men and women in these areas. Well, you're the ones who chose to be the girl bosses. You chose to be the husbands of the family. And oh no, I can't find my wife. So, well, you have to understand that men when they are finding their wives are not looking for people of a similar education level, similar income level, similar experience in various fields of work, work, whatever. Someone who is basically functionally independent from them as well. That's that's not what men are looking for actually. Uh men are looking for women who honestly will be dependent on them so they can raise their children and so he can feel like a provider. You don't have that impulse. You don't have that drive. What you have is access to a high status job, a good amount of resources, and therefore you're like, "Right, okay. Well, I don't want to give that up because why would you? I mean, it's risky to give that up." But it also prevents you from fulfilling that deepest, darkest impulse of a woman to be the mother and the wife of family. And so you're not going to get it. You you are literally locked out of it because of the kind of your life you're live living. You're like, "Yeah, but I can't give up these things." It's like, "Well, then you you'll never get this thing." And this is why this article exists. This is why you're answering these questions. And this is obviously something that bothers you. Otherwise, why what are we doing here? Why are we having this conversation?
Laura in her 40s from San Francisco said she'd been single for the better part of a decade since her divorce despite having used many dating apps and having been attended uh dozens of singles events. "There's an imbalance between education levels now in the US. Many men don't want to date someone who's more educated or makes more money than them." Well, why would they? Why would you? Why are you looking for someone who's like a toy boy? Like you know many men of course would actually like to be the bread winner and if women have sub sub um not subverted uh overthrown men's position as the bread winner because of a decade of feminism then who's to blame? I mean you are part of the problem right? You're the empowered girl boss so you're like wow I can't find any men who are worth dating it's like well yeah because they had to go through the ranks do the things you've done and arrive with that experience and sort of vetery in life that uh allows them to be impressive to you. These sort of men are made. They're not born and you've you usurp them frankly and so you're like, "Okay, well h I just can't find that husband." Okay, well that's fine. Your bloodline will die with you. You'll be a very strange aberration in the long continuum of humanity at some point. Someone in the, you know, 500 years or something will find this article like, "Wow, really? There were all these women who just totally out competed men in the social marketplace in the the e economically, educationally, socially, and they couldn't find husbands. I mean, this will be a lesson for women in the future. Don't try and out compete the men because you will be lonely at the end of it." And that's all that's what all of these women are saying.
And then you say, "Well, there's Peter Pan syndrome. A lot of men don't want to grow up." Why would they? Like you are you've t growing up is what happens when you become the bread winner when people become dependent on you. For men, I'm not saying it's like that for women, but for men it's when you have dependence. And so you have to become the man, the responsibility, the person bearing the responsibilities. And if you take that away from young men, well, they don't grow into it. So you're just like, well, I can't find any serious men. And they're all very childish and irresponsible. Well, there we go. These are the men you've made. And Jordan Peterson was warning about this years ago. He's like, "What kind of men do you want to date?" Back in like 2017, he was like warning about this. And now they're like, "Yeah, well, I just can't find any any good men because they're all irresponsible." Yeah, I'm not surprised. I'm not surprised.
Although almost all women who are looking for a partner did not site standout levels of professional finance financial success as a priority, financial self-sufficiency was crucial for many. So it's not even that you're looking for a wife then. Like it's you are looking you're not looking for someone who's going to look after your kids. You're looking for like again a kind of pen pal or something, right? Like so like someone who just a a roommate with whom you have sex is kind of what you're looking for which isn't in all in any again independence. What do you mean independence? How can you be looking for independence when you're in a committed relationship like that's that is a form of dependence? I keep hearing the word independence from women like online and you know various other places. I hear the word independence and I'm just like what does that mean to you? What do you think you're looking for then? Like any relationship that is a romantic relationship involves a certain level of emotional dependence on the other person. Right? So the very the very nature of being in a committed relationship is a lack of independence. Like that's the the the first point is you're not independent of that other person. Whenever you go out, you have think you have a person to whom you have obligations to whom you have to be uh like you owe some sort of loyalty and concern and consideration towards. You are not independent. So like oh well I I want you to be financially self-sufficient. It's like all right okay well then why do I need you? Like, I'm not saying that I want a woman to pay for me. But like, if you expect self-sufficiency, well, okay, I have that and now I'm playing Xbox and just working my minimum wage job, drinking beers, and playing games with the boys. Why do I need to grow up if it's just self self-sufficiency for the pair of us?
Kelly from Portland says, "I'm a self-employed high earner. I'm working on a memoir." So many people are going to read that, aren't they, Kelly? Own rental property and have struggled with finding someone who who's like me, creative and high earning. I don't drink or smoke and I don't want a partner who does either." Okay. Well, I mean, maybe if I was a 48-year-old man in Portland, I'd be more interested in some woman in her 30s who wasn't a high earner and actually needed me around, you know? Like, I'd be more interested in just like someone who didn't have an entire sort of empire of her own because she's not looking to actually build a new life with me.
While most women elaborated on their experience of being single in a social sense, some explained why they were why they were legally single despite wanting to be married to their current partner. Well, we'll skip those ones because uh basically she's like, "My boyfriend doesn't make enough money." Um uh you have uh Christina, a mental health therapist from Chicago, said she had withdrawn from active dating after being dumped by someone who did not want to commit. Uh though she reported feeling overall happy being single, she did have concerns about the ability to have children. "Women are freer than ever to make their own lives outside of the confines of romantic relationships. But the biological clock thing weighs heavily on my mind."
Ah yes, cuz you're getting towards your mid-30s now. And the baby raies, your your biological clock is saying, "Look, you are actually running out of time. Uh you actually need to get on with this." And so women being freer than ever. Okay, great. Good for you. Why are you writing articles like this? Why is this something that's weighing on your mind? Because, and this is this is when you're in your 30s and 40s. Imagine what it's going to be like when you're in your 50s and 60s and you just look back and go, "Well, at least I attended all those meetings. At least I was on all those Zoom calls. At least I answered all those emails and the company functioned very, very well. And now I'm going to get my retirement to sit around and reminisce about all of those Zoom calls. All of all of those days where I was in the office click clacking away on a keyboard. I mean I I really felt like I made a difference, right? Genuinely like what what have you accomplished? What have you actually made in the world? What have we actually contributed to the world that when you again when you're in your 60s you can look back and go wow that was worth it you're essentially nothing like there's essentially nothing there you've got the sort of make work email jobs and it's like okay great so what like you think think that wouldn't have been done if you'd not done it anyway.
This is uh the whole thing is just like this and I I'll leave it there but I find it really really kind of sad because you've got here a 42y old who decided that what she was going to do uh is put up billboards saying look I want to get married and have kids in the next two to three years. Well, I mean how do you know that you're going to be able to at 42? Do you even know? But she she took out this ad campaign and she's got a website and she's got the non-negotiables listed on her website. "Family must be on board with a monogous relationship with the intent of dating to marriage. Must be all right with the time frame of the marriage and starting a family in the next two to three years." Well, uh good luck. Education, college educated, bachelor's degree at a minimum. Why? Like what difference does it make? Wouldn't it be better if he was some big hunky guy? But anyway, what do I know? Lifestyle generally he a generally healthy lifestyle must no weed, no tobacco, no psychedelics or recreational drug use, good hygiene. Okay. Well, that's not too much to ask for, but um politics must be Democrat or liberal or left-leaning politically."
You you are you are getting exactly what you deserve as the feminist independent girl boss. And I just find it so funny that you're like, "Okay, I don't know what else to do." She's spending apparently loads of money on this ad campaign as well, though she hasn't told us how much. But it's just like that is I mean that is just I don't want to be mean but like you made a series of choices in life and these series of choices come with consequences right? Every time you're presented with a choice you can do A or B the other alternative becomes unavailable to you and you've made a series of choices in which look you've got this perfect life on your phone. That was the choice that you made. And you close the door when you go through when you close door A when you go through door B. And so now you're like, "Okay, but I' I'd really like to, uh, you know, find find a guy 35 to 45, uh, who's never married, no kids, and located in the San Francisco Bay, Silicon Valley area." It's like, I bet you would. Um, but it looks like that door is closed, doesn't it? So, it looks like that's not going to happen. And this like would you marry someone who'd done this? I don't think I would. I think that's kind of just weird and desperate and kind of sad to be honest. Like the whole thing is actually genuinely quite sad.
But this is going to become a plague in left-wing areas of the United States where women who were raised in a feminist environment given all of the opportunities, all of the doors to the girl boss career and the ladder climbing that they get to do opened up to them because they were women at the expense of men who otherwise would have fulfilled those roles. And now like, okay, well, I can't find a guy who's my equal and who wants to date and who isn't like laden with loads of baggage and I just I'm just going to be single forever. It's like, yeah, you basically are going to be single forever, actually. Uh, and I'm sorry that you've become an incel, but you uh you at least get to enjoy your perfect life as the girl boss, right?