Transcription
In this video, I'm going to share 10 small micro habits that you can start doing daily to start regulating your nervous system. So, this is not about cold plunges or fancy healing modalities. This is just small, easy things that you could start doing throughout your day to stay in a more regulated state.
So many of us are living in a constant state of nervous system dysfunction and we don't even realize it or how much damage it's doing because it's become so normal to us. But let's start changing that.
Hey friend, welcome back. If you're new here, my name is Jill and I help women step into their power, tap into their divine feminine, and become their best self, live their best life. So, if that's something you want to do, you should subscribe and stick around. And if you want to sign up for my free weekly newsletter, it drops in your inbox for free every Tuesday. The link for that is down below.
So, the first small micro habit to start regulating your nervous system, and this is so small, but such a game changer, is to realize that your urgency is optional. meaning that we often do simple, non-urgent tasks with urgency and tension and with an internal sense of rush. Think about it. We do this all the time. You're unloading the dishwasher like you're on a timer. You're brushing your teeth as quickly as you can just so you can get it done. You're typing an email. It's literally just an email, but yet you realize that your shoulders are tense and your jaw is clenched. You're sitting at a red light and you can feel your whole body tense up, anxious for it to turn green. You have to realize, and this will do wonders for your nervous system, that 99% of the urgency that you experience in your body is self-created and completely unnecessary. That sense of urgency that you have isn't coming from your circumstances. Most of the time, it is often a pattern that our nervous system has learned. You've trained your body to believe that moving through life with tension and urgency keeps you safe. That's the subconscious belief there. But spoiler alert, it doesn't. It just keeps you disregulated. Nothing bad will happen if you unload the dishwasher at a normal, natural, calm human pace. That email you're writing that makes you clench your jaw, that email is going to get sent whether your jaw is clenched or relaxed. That light will turn green eventually, whether you're tense or not.
So, what actually happens when you operate with constant urgency? Well, your body never gets the message that you are safe. It thinks you're in danger all day long. So, it stays in constant fight or flight. And that is exhausting. So, the shift isn't about necessarily doing less or slowing down your entire life. It's about doing the same things that you are already doing, but without that tightness in your body, without that sense of urgency, without that sense of rush. That's it. And when you can become conscious of this and change this pattern, you'll realize just how much you've been putting your body through for literally no reason.
Habit number two, move your body, but not as punishment, as regulation. A lot of us at some point develop this relationship with movement and exercise and working out where it's all about burning calories or hitting goals or being disciplined. And of course, there's nothing wrong with those things. But for your nervous system, movement isn't just about achievement and discipline. It's about release. Here's what I mean, okay? When you get anxious or stressed or frustrated, all of that energy has to go somewhere. Cuz keep in mind, remember, according to physics, energy can never be created or destroyed. It only moves and changes form. And so, if you're sitting there all day, sitting at your desk, sitting on the couch, sitting in the car, that energy can stay trapped in your body as tension. Movement is how you get it out. It's how you shake off what you've been holding. It's how you release. It's how you regulate.
Have you ever noticed how dogs do that cute little full body shake where their hair goes everywhere? Well, it's not random. They do it in response to stress or anxiety and even excitement. They're literally moving energy through and out their body to downregulate. All animals do this in their own way. And we're no different. We just forgot. So, it could be a full hourong workout or it could be 5 minutes of dancing in your living room. It could be a cute Pilates class or it could be a few minutes of stretching and shaking it out. It could be running on the treadmill or it could be a slow, gentle walk in nature, but movement is how all animals regulate.
And that brings me to the sponsor of today's video, Train Well. So, if you've been around here for a while, you guys know that I love Train Well. I've been using it for a long time now. But if you don't know Train Well, Train Well is the ultimate one-on-one remote personal training service. So, they connect you to a personal trainer, like a real human, not like an AI bot or anything. My personal trainer's name is Jill and I love her. I've been working with her for like at least a year and a half now. And before train well, I really struggled with being consistent and even when I would go to the gym and would go out, I just had no idea what to do. So, here's how it works. So, once you're matched with your trainer, you have an onboarding call with them where you talk about your goals, your schedule, any injuries that you have, or anything that you think is relevant. And then your trainer builds a completely personalized workout plan specifically for you and is there to support you virtually throughout the week and whenever you need it. And honestly, even just having that human accountability piece is huge. You know, like just having Jill check in with me or adjust my workouts as needed when I'm traveling or when life gets busy. It's made it so much easier to actually stay consistent, especially because you're consistently in communication with them and they can adjust whatever you need because it is personalized specifically for you. Um, my trainer gel even helps me sync my workouts to my cycle and I love that. The end of last year and early this year, I was feeling a little bit burnt out and I was just honest with my trainer and I just told her that and so she adjusted my workouts to be a little bit more calming, a little bit more gentle on the nervous system because that's what I needed at the time. And because she was there to help guide me through that a bit, I remained consistent. I've never been this consistent with working out in my entire adult life and it's because of Train Well and Jill. I love that she just tells me what to do, but also it's really specific to me and I've definitely gotten stronger, too. So, huge fan. In my description box, there's a link for you guys where you can take a quiz to get matched with your personal trainer and get 14 days completely free. So, you might as well try it because it's 14 days completely free. So, thank you to Train Well and let's get back into the video.
Okay, habit number three, and I might be calling you out on this one right now. Stop bringing your phone into the bathroom. We all do it sometimes. But comment down below if you're watching this from the toilet. But let's be honest, okay? If you can't pee without scrolling Instagram or scrolling through some Tik Toks or reading the news, that's a nervous system problem. You are stuck in a dopamine loop. Every time you scroll, your brain goes into seeking mode. It's scanning. It's evaluating. It's looking for what's next. It's processing information, processing images, sounds, emotions, and that keeps your nervous system activated and alert. Your brain needs moments of nothing. No input, no entertainment, no information coming in. Okay, that's when it processes and regulates. And this is not how it used to be. You know, just one decade ago, two decades ago, we never had this problem, this scrolling problem. There were periods of nothing. But now, when every single transition moment in your day is filled with your phone, whether that's you sitting on the toilet or waiting in line or sitting at a red light, your nervous system never gets a break. And your brain is always in consuming mode, never just in being mode. So, just leave your phone outside the bathroom. Let yourself be bored for 60 seconds. You're going to be fine, and your nervous system will thank you.
Daily habit number four to regulate your nervous system, write everything down. And that sounds like just general productivity advice. But I'm serious. This is so good for your nervous system. Write everything down. And I mean everything. Your to-dos, your appointments, that random idea that you had or that thing that you want to remember to tell your friend later. All of it. None of that should be living in your brain on a daily basis and stressing you out. Once you get all of that stuff out of your head and onto paper or even onto the notes app of your phone, whatever, then your body can actually relax because you don't have to remember it anymore. Your brain is not meant to be a storage unit, okay? It's not meant to just hold all of this random information. Your brain, the human brain, is meant for processing things, solving problems, creative thinking, and actually experiencing life. And when you try to use it, like remembering all the little things that I have to do, your nervous system stays on alert because it has to remember all the little things that you have to do. Don't forget to call the dentist. Don't forget to send that email. Don't forget to pick up that thing from the store. When all that stuff is kept in your head, your brain is running a background loop of reminders all day long. And that is your nervous system staying vigilant and activated so you don't drop the ball. Every idea I ever have for a video, I immediately write it down. Every appointment that I have or a friend date or anything, I immediately put it in my calendar. All of my to-dos, every single one are always written down so that my body doesn't have to hold on to it anymore. So, write it down. Use your notes app or a planner or a journal or use my notion template. That's what I use. It works really great. Use whatever works for you, whatever feels the best for you. But just get it out of your head and written down somewhere because the moment you externalize those thoughts, your nervous system gets to relax.
Now, next very very tiny thing to help regulate your nervous system on the daily is to audibly sigh or hum. And I know that sounds a little random, but when you audibly sigh or hum, you are directly activating your vag nerve, which is the main nerve in your body that runs all the way from your brain down your throat down through the digestive system. And it's the main nerve responsible for telling your body that it is safe to relax and for turning on that relaxation response. Okay? So, when you audibly sigh or hum, it activates that vag nerve and it calms you down. If you just silently exhale, it doesn't do the same thing because it's the sound that vibrates the vagus nerve and stimulates that relaxation response. And that's what shifts you out of fight or flight. And you might notice that you just do this naturally throughout your day. You know, when you're a little anxious or frustrated, I catch myself doing this all the time. I audibly sigh out loud when I just need to get a little bit of tension out. Some people naturally hum when they get stressed and this is the same thing because it's a natural way that we regulate in moments of tension and it does work. So if you feel yourself becoming a bit on edge and you want to calm down and you want to regulate yourself a little bit, you know, whether maybe you're getting irritated sitting in traffic or you get a frustrating email, audibly sigh out loud or hum your favorite song. That works just the same and it helps you stay centered. And singing works, too. If you like singing, it does the exact same effect.
Habit number six to regulate your nervous system is to stop multitasking all the time. And here's the thing with multitasking. We can't actually do it. It's a myth, okay? Your brain can't actually do two things at once. It's impossible. It just switches back and forth really, really fast. Now, obviously, you know, you can fold laundry and listen to music at the same time. Or you can drive your car and talk to your friend in the passenger seat at the same time. And that's because at least one of those things that you're doing is not a conscious task. Sometimes we do things that are just subconscious like folding laundry or even driving a lot of times is subconscious. You can do those things at the same time because one is conscious and the other is automatic or subconscious. So I'm talking about trying to do two things at once that both require your conscious attention. Like being on a work call while answering emails, even watching TV while scrolling your phone, cooking dinner while also listening to a podcast, and also texting your friend back. When you do that, your brain is in constant task switching mode and that is stressful to the nervous system. I mean, over time, this becomes stressful. It makes you hypervigilant. When you focus on just one thing really deeply, your brain can drop into a flow state. And I'm sure you felt that before. It's where you have deep focus and attention. And that flow state is actually regulating for your nervous system. But when you're multitasking, you never get there. You are never in a flow state. you stay in this surface level scattered attention mode and this keeps your nervous system constantly activated because it can never settle. So the shift is one thing at a time. And the funny thing is is we usually get way more done productivity-wise when we stop multitasking anyway.
Now next, if you want to regulate your nervous system, you need to stop rehearsing problems that haven't happened yet. And we all do this, okay? You're lying in bed rehearsing the conversation that you're going to have with your boss tomorrow. You're in the shower scripting out the argument you might have with your partner about something that hasn't even happened yet. You're driving to the gym mentally preparing for that awkward run-in with that person that you are trying to avoid, who by the way is probably not even there. Here's the thing that you have to understand. Okay? Your nervous system cannot tell the difference between a real threat and a vividly imagined one. It cannot tell the difference. So when you are mentally rehearsing that problem, which by the way, 95% chance that it's not going to happen, but when you are mentally rehearsing that problem, your body reacts as if it's happening. This just happened to me last week, which is why I remembered to put it in this video. Okay, I was walking my dog and I started thinking about, well, what if my husband did this or said this? I can't remember what it was, but if he did this, I would be angry. Except he didn't do that. I made it up in my head. But what happened when I thought about it? I got a little sweaty. My heart rate increased a little bit. I could feel the cortisol moving through my body. Your body still reacts as if it's happening. And it's keeping your nervous system on edge. And if you're someone who does this all the time, your nervous system is always reacting. Your nervous system is meant to react to problems and threats. That is a good thing. That's what you want. That is a healthy functioning nervous system. But when you are constantly visualizing problems over and over again in your head, then your nervous system is constantly trying to protect you from problems that aren't even real. If the problem happens, you will deal with it when it comes and you'll handle it. But until then, if you start going down that path again, notice it and remind yourself, "This isn't happening. If it happens, I'll handle it when it's real." Save your nervous system the energy.
Habit number eight, run your hands under water and actually feel it. And I know this is very simple, but it does work. Like I said, when you're feeling stressed or anxious or whatever, go to the sink, turn on the water, it can be really hot or really cold, whatever you want, and run your hands under it for like 30 seconds. And make sure to get your wrists too, like this area. And actually pay attention to it, okay? Pay attention to the sensation. Feel the temperature. Feel the water running over your fingers, your palm, your wrists. Notice the sensation. The reason why this little trick works is because it immediately brings your body back into the present moment. In order to be in a calm nervous system state, that only exists when you're in the present moment. When you're anxious or stressed, you're usually stuck in your head, anxious about the future, replaying the past, etc. But when you give yourself a new physical sensation and focus on that, even something as simple like water on your hands, it pulls your attention out of your thoughts and into right now. The moment you get back into your body, you get out of the spiral. So, this is just like a quick little reset that you can do on the daily when you need it, it works.
Okay. So, the next thing is something that is I in my opinion really underrated when it comes to the nervous system and nervous system regulation. And that is having periods of being completely unreachable. Your nervous system, okay, needs time where no one can reach you. Not your boss, not your mom, not your group chat, nobody. Think about it. Our grandparents had hours of unreachability every single day. When they left the house, they were gone. They were at work or at the store or on a walk. And for the most part, nobody could reach them. When they were driving, nobody could reach them. And if they went on vacation, no one was getting a hold of them unless they knew the name of the hotel and called the hotel. If someone needed them, they had to wait. But you, you have maybe 7 minutes in the shower. That's it. Even our parents' generation. When our parents left work, they left work. They weren't getting texts from their boss at 9:00 p.m. They weren't watching their emails pile up on their phone overnight. They didn't even have access to their work stuff unless they were at work. And so your nervous system was never designed for this constant availability and never turning off. It needs periods where you are unreachable. When you are always available, your nervous system stays on. And you've probably felt this, okay? when you were relaxing and taking a break, but your phone was sitting right next to you face up. And even though you were relaxing, you knew that there was a chance that a text could come through or a call could come through or an email could come through or any other random notifications on your phone could come through. And because of that, you can feel yourself not fully 100% relaxing. And so that constant background hum of someone might need me or something might be happening, that keeps your nervous system slightly on alert. And when that happens all the time, it just never gets a break. So create a period in your day where you are actually unreachable. And try do not disturb in your phone. It's a really wonderful tool. And if you're worried about not being able to be contacted by someone, you can actually have it set up in your phone where certain people can bypass the do not disturb. So I have it so that my husband can still call me even though I have my phone in do not disturb, but then I don't get any other calls, texts, notifications, anything. and it's wonderful. But my point is create a period in your day where you are mostly at least unreachable. Maybe it's dinner time with your family or maybe it's your lunch break during the day. You know, put your phone on do not disturb and throw it in a drawer. Or maybe it's during your morning routine or maybe on Sundays you go off grid a little bit. I know there's always a fear in the back of your head that you might miss something important, but the fact is is that true emergencies are very rare and most of the time at least a few hours of being unreachable is not actually going to change the outcome.
And the last tiny habit to start having a more regulated nervous system and again I don't really hear anyone talking about this one as much when it comes to the nervous system. Stop constantly tracking yourself like it's a science experiment. So I'm talking about the constant monitoring. How many steps did I get today? How was my sleep score? How many glasses of water have I had? What's my heart rate variability? How many calories did I burn? How's my cycle tracking looking? Now, I'm not saying that data is bad, and I'm not anti-tracking. And if this truly brings you great joy and you love it, then go for it. But when you are constantly checking in on yourself, constantly measuring, constantly evaluating, your nervous system goes into a state of vigilance, and it's assessing, is this good, is this bad, is this a problem, is it not? So, you can end up in this weird loop where you're stressing about your stress levels. You're anxious about your sleep quality. You're worried that your HRV is off, and that makes your HRV even worse because you're worried about it. It's this exhausting cycle. And the irony is is that these tools are supposed to make us healthier. But for a lot of people, they're just creating more anxiety. So, if you feel yourself getting stressed by that kind of stuff, take a break. Take a break from tracking everything. It is quite freeing. Or at least stop checking your stats. so obsessively. You don't need to know your exact step count to know if you moved your body today. You don't need a sleep score to know if you're tired. If you feel like you are always being watched, assessed, monitored, evaluated, which is what this is kind of. It just can sometimes make it so you can't fully relax. And sometimes your body and your nervous system just wants to exist without being observed.
So, these are the 10 little micro habits. They really do work. And these are all the changes that I've made to shift how I feel in my day-to-day. And just a little reminder to check out Train Well. You can click the link below in the description to get matched with a personal trainer and get 14 days completely free. Now, obviously, all of these little habits, they are tiny, they are micro, and they are just meant to help you in the day-to-day. But if you actually want to rewire your nervous system, I highly recommend you go watch this video, how to actually heal your nervous system. because in this video I break it down so clearly and in a way that you have probably never heard before. So I'll see you over here or I'll just see you next time in my next video. Bye.