Transcription
Okay. Is everybody ready? All right. So today, this, so for me, this is the most, in all of everything we do, in all of the program, the most important thing you can do is forgive. Like, the root of everything that keeps us in a cycled addiction is because of unforgiveness.
Anyway, so it's super simple, right? Just a good visual breakout. Everything that I teach in the Lord's Prayer, I had a vision that came with it, right? And so in this one, uncover your face. It's like, look, no hoods on. Like, while you're, while you're wearing that, you can have your hands in. As soon as you get put in uniform, don't let me catch your hands in your sweater. Uh, but nothing covering your face, nothing covering your head. We, we're done stealing stuff, right? Amen. Can't get amen. Not worth even, right?
Uh, so we are a vessel, right? That's, that's how we're described throughout scripture. We're the temple, right? We have, we have a limited capacity of what it is that we can hold. And so in the, in the, in the, the perspective of forgiveness, this is you. This is, uh, this is, uh, uh, Nicholas, right? This is, this makes up everything of Nicholas, this cup. And this cup can only hold so much of any one thing. Right now, you can mix a whole lot of different things in there, but they won't be palatable. Does anybody not know what palatable means? It's going to taste like crap. It means if you taste it, it's going to taste like crap. So, you want it all filled with something good, right? Something refreshing, something new, right?
So, whenever you come into this place, you're full of unforgiveness, anger, rage, envy, you, maliciousness. I mean, there's just a whole lot of stuff we picked up and accumulated from jail, from the streets, from addiction. And that's what we're full of. The core of it and primarily what everything else will stem from is from the times whenever people hurt me, wounded me in some way, didn't show up for me in some way, didn't meet my expectations for some way, physically assaulted me in one way or another, whether it be sexual or violently, my, the abandonment for my parents, you get the drift, right? Anything that could be in there that you held as a resentment. And a lot of times the reality is we don't even realize we're full of resentments. We don't even realize that we're full of unforgiveness.
And so what God wants is he wants to fill us up with everything good. Love, joy, peace, patience, kindness. He wants to be us to be fully possessed by his Holy Spirit. But in order to do that, we've got to empty this thing out because if I'm already full of unforgiveness and bitterness and jealousy and all those things, how is he going to put any of him in? Does that make sense?
So, and there's a way that we can start filling it up and it will overflow all that bad stuff out. But the reason why I say this is the most important day is because this is the day that you get to willingly pour it out and it will shorten the process. Now, you stay in position and you keep your butt in that chair and eventually he'll fill it up so much that it gets most of everything out of it and you're filled with only what he has for you. But if you can take a step of boldness in the exercise that I'm going to have you do because you'll have homework tonight. Usually you got a weekend to do it. Today, you're going to have a very small amount of time in between classes because it's Monday. Uh, and what that is is you're going to make a list of everything you need to forgive people for. That's what I need you to do.
If there's one thing, listen, I'm the founder and creator of this program. I've been here from the very beginning and I'm not boasting in that. What I'm saying is if I'm telling you this is the most important thing. I've seen men live. I've seen men die. You get it? I've seen men be very successful and men have the appearance of success and then fall short. I've seen them get into phase three and blow it all. I've seen them come through eight days later, leave, come back, make it through the whole thing, and have stood in position for years now. And I'm telling you, the most important thing that you can do as far as me and my class and my perspective of this program goes is to make a very bold list of what you need to forgive others for. You get it?
Because it's you volunt, it's a surrender. It's a surrender. And in that surrender, he's able to move more mightily because not only are you surrendering those things, but it's in awe of who he is. You get it? So, I want it before we start going through these scriptures, I want everybody to have a clear picture of that. You're going to make a list. You have throughout today and tonight and then tomorrow morning. I'll give you all a little bit more time, but it's not much. And then we're going to burn some lists. What we do is we, you write these lists. We read these lists. We burn these lists. It's called a prophetic act. Whatever is done on in heaven is done on earth. And so he says, "All of these things are burned up on the threshing floor." So we want to, we want to take and and invade earth with heaven. You understand?
You put, I would, I would put as bold as you can possibly get with it. As bold as you can possibly get with it. I would get with it. What's that? I would say this. It's a simple prayer. Listen, a simple prayer. Lord, show me what is left. Search me and show me. Holy Spirit, guide me. Show me what it is. And if it crossed your mind for a second, write it down. Don't discount anything. Just trust that it's him. Just write it down. What? Listen, I mean, this is the truth. I've done, I don't know how many hundreds of lists. You know what I'm saying? You may not put the same stuff. I promise you, like if you're sitting here right now, then ask the Holy Spirit to guide you a little deeper because the stuff that you were able to get last time was only so deep. Have him take you a little bit deeper. As you go into phase two and start working, uh, working the 12-step program, you'll also do a four-step which will help a lot further everything that we're doing right now in this class.
So, Father God, I just thank you, Lord God. Holy Spirit, I thank you for guiding us in and in and in, in the depths of you revealing who we are and allow searching us out so that you can remove any defect, Lord God, that we could surrender to you everyone we've held, uh, something against that you would remove the bitter roots of unforgiveness in Jesus name I pray. Amen.
Okay, I'm going to start with scripture and get through it the best I can. We got a lot to go through. Ephesians 4:31-32 says this, "Get rid of all bitterness." Listen, if, if the Bible says for you to get rid of something, it would mean by nature you don't need the deliverance, right? You get it? If it's saying get rid of this, it means you have the ability to do it. Who here thinks they can't control their temper? That's ridiculous. That's, that you're lying to yourself. Look, my, me losing my temper, I always had a choice right before I did it. And the fire and the intensity was dependent on how much I needed to control the room. This is what it looks like if you can be real and honest with yourself. And we let down all those walls. That's what it really looks like.
Says, "Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, brawling, slander along with every form of malice." Look, as we walk through this, if you have a question, do you understand what all of those are? That he's saying that you have the power to get rid of. And I'm not saying, look, I'm not saying it's not a challenge. I'm not saying people have not wronged you. That's not what I'm saying. This is what I'm saying. And the 12 steps will teach you this. They wronged you once, but every day you hold on to that is you wronging yourself in their name. They wronged you one time and but every day you hang on to it, it's you wronging yourself in on behalf of them because you're not letting it go. You understand? So that person you think did it to you, did this horrible thing, you're the one re-offending on behalf of them every day. You hang on to it 'cause you could let it go and be free from it, but you're letting another dude or whoever it is take up residence in your head and in your heart and that man or woman is controlling every action today because of what they did 10 years ago. Does that make sense? And you're submitting to their authority in your life right now. You, anybody got a question on that? That's a whole big amount. That's a deep thing right there. I'm trying to remember what I said it. So every, so they, they, they are the offender or they're the, the, the criminal. They're the person that hurt you once. Every day you don't let it go is you hurting yourself on behalf of them. Does that make sense? It's like, it's like if I'm his boss and he goes to work wearing my work shirt, he's working on behalf of me, right? He's representing me at work. Well, if you don't let go of that, you're representing that person that hurt you in your own life to hurt you again. Make sense? Y'all are a sharp group. If it does what? Now it's a lot easier. Yeah.
And but in order to do that, listen, God wants to partner with us in the action of faith. So for I want to choose joy and he wants me to be created in the image of his son. And so in order to do that, I have to be a partner in action with action in my faith by saying, you know what, I'm going to choose to forgive this person. I'm gonna choose to forgive this person. I'm gonna choose to forgive this person. Whenever, Robert, whenever you're talking, I want to make you a shirt that says, "Don't be a petty Tom instead of Tom Petty." Anyway, Yeah. A better picture would be as if it was wrapped around a pole and it's hurting his hand but also hanging around his neck. You know what I'm saying? And all he has to do is let go of it and then quit killing. That's addiction. If I let go, I'll quit killing myself.
Okay, listen. It says, uh, "Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, brawling, slander, along with every form of malice." Be kind. Listen, there's always the replacement. Look, if I empty this out, it's not supposed to stay empty. Once I get rid of these things, it has to be filled up with something else. And that's a prime example in this scripture because God doesn't want to leave you empty. He wants to fill it up with something. He says, "Take these actions and get rid of this." Which means we have the ability on our own right now to step into the next. It says, "Be kind, compassionate to one another, forgiving each other just as in Christ God forgave you." The hardest part we have with forgiving someone else, I think, is accepting that he's forgiven me and then forgiving myself. Your greatest offender you need to write on your list is you. You have to be able to forgive yourself.
John 15 is so beautiful. It so dictates what's going on in my life right now. And at the very end, in the middle of it, it says, "Those who obey my commands are are my friends." And it says, "My commands are this. Love me. Love yourself. It's so simple. And if you have that love, then you're my friend." So amazing.
1 John 1:9 says, "If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just, and he will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness." So there's two things. Listen, the action of faith to take action in our faith, the confession of sins one to another. Listen, it's one thing to go to God and confess them, but it very clearly dictates in the word over and over and over that we're supposed to do it one to another because, and this is why, this is what I believe, it has to come from darkness into the light. It has to come from a dark place into the light. Once it's brought into the light, it's burned up. And then it says, uh, it says, "He is faithful and he is, he is faithful and just and will forgive us and purify us from all unrighteousness." Listen, it's not your job to try to make yourself righteous or make yourself holy. It literally says if you confess your sins and surrender to him in his character, he will cleanse us of all unrighteousness, which means then we're made righteous. The heavy lifting is always on his shoulders. He's the one that does that. You don't have to strive for that. If, if you do the simple confession, if you do the simple pursuit, if you're open, honest, and transparent, if you lay everything out there and talk honestly about what it is you're going through, what's going on in your mind, your fears, your anxieties, your worries, and then you pray together. We just talked about the fellowship, right? In that fellowship where you're able to communicate and then pray over those things. Listen, I'm not saying it's a magic fix that'll work right now, but I promise you if you stay purposeful and intentional right now in this moment, those moments stack together. And then you look back and behind you, there is a wake of purpose.
Isaiah 43:25-26 says, "I, even I, am he who blots out your transgressions for my own sake." God says he does it for his own sake. He doesn't even do it for your sake. He loves you so much he's doing it so he can spend time with you, not the other way around. We still get this thought, thought, we still get caught up in this thought process where we have to do and if we have to do, then there's no need for grace. Now, he wants to partner with me in my faith. He wants so that I can grow and mature. But that's not a requirement. It says he does it for his own sake. And remembers our sins no more. He says, "Review the past for me. Let us argue the matter together. State the case for your innocence." In other versions, it says, "So that you may be acquitted."
Nick, if your throws off, just stand up. It's easier before you actually do it when you feel it. The sleepiness will not go away. You cannot fight it from the chair. I want y'all to know that. Like, if you start getting sleepy, there's no way to fight it from the chair because your butt is in absolute agreement with your sleepiness. And as long as it's resting, you're going to, it's going to get harder and harder. Just saying. So if you start a knot off, just instantly stand up. If not, you're going to go to sleep. Do you need to use restrooms? Well, why don't you go use restroom? You know the last part 26 for me is always about it's always, uh, uh, it's always him saying, I know you can accept that I love you so much that grace is so that I can spend time for you so but so that you can, you can bring all that and as you lay it all out, everything that you think separates me from you, I'm going to acquit you so then you can step fully in all of the gift that I give you. And it's a love story.
Listen, this is the thing is God loves you more than you can ever imagine. He loves you more than you can. And until you really experience it, it'll, it'll be a joke to you. You'll intellectualize it and it's, you know, it'll be all these different things until that moment when your life finally gets so bad that you'll try anything to either die or live. Anything. I just want to die or I just, I'll do anything to live. And once you get to that place, it's only in the worst place can you experience his true goodness. That's the only place. And it's then it'll begin to be a love story to you because it won't make any sense because you've pissed on him. You pissed on him and pissed on him and pissed on him. And in spite of it, he keeps reaching. In spite of it, he keeps grabbing. In spite of it, he's always there. What do you got? Listen.
So, check this out. This is the easiest way to explain it. I think whenever, let me think, when I do something for, for myself, like I will on, on Thursday night at 4:30. Th, every Thursday at 4:30, my alarm goes off and it, it just says my wife's name so that I shut everything I'm doing, doing down so that I can spend time with my wife. Now, originally I thought I did that to make, have a, for us to have a happy, healthy marriage and to keep her happy. As I've matured in my marriage, I've realized that I desperately need that time alone with her so that I'm renewed in the covenant of my marriage and I get to experience her. So, I do that. Even though everybody else thinks it's for her, it's actually for me. I need that time with her. I need time alone where it's just us. I need to be able to pour out and serve. That's my best example. And that's, if we're the bride and he's the groom, that would probably be the best example I can find. And he'll remember our sins no more. It's like, listen, I'm blotting everything out because I desire to spend time with you, me with my wife, and I'll remember that stuff never again.
Everybody's like, listen, there's so many times when the Bible conflicts with itself. Like it says, uh, you'll remember it no more. But then if you go into scripture whenever it talks about the judgment seat of Christ, it says we'll be rewarded for, for the good things we do and the bad things we do. But everybody pretends to forget that God is a wrathful God that poured everything out on the cross. So it's like literally when he says, "I'll remember it no more." Even as a believer and a teacher, I, I believe that he will remember those things no more. Now, the hard part that it says will be held to a higher account, I believe is right now, real time. I'm going to have to live and walk. I'm going to have to watch my wife not be able to talk or walk. I'm going to have to be persecuted in the media right now because I gracefully reach out and love people that deserve it about as much as I did when I came to know him. And then in the midst of it, they start throwing my wife in the mix and there's an accusation of her even and they have her picture posted and now she has anxiety. And you know what me and her did this morning? Prayed for him and his wife. Prayed for him and his wife and his family. Not that they would be better or held accountable, but that they would experience what we were trying to experience this morning, the presence of the Lord. You get it? That, that I would never again. Well, and if you can read from the perspective of Hebrews is trying to expose what the law is versus what grace is. So if I sin again in the same way that I sin before and I have brought this sacrifice, no matter how unblemished, as soon as I sinned, it made the sacrifice no good, no good anymore. But he was the one true sacrifice that over and over now allows us to step fully in what grace is. And that's what the author of Hebrews is trying to expose. He's trying to show this is what it is, what you live in now, but this is the fullness of what it's supposed to be.
Acts 3:19 says this, "Repent." Then let's talk about repent, right? Who here does not know what repent means? And it's okay if you don't. Anybody? Really? You don't? Go ahead. I'm gonna get both of y'all. Go ahead. Yeah. Who does not know what repent means? You don't. You don't either. That was me. You turn those to me. So this is by, uh, so by normal Webster standards, repent means to turn away from. That's normal Webster. But this is what I'll tell you. I don't know how to turn away from stuff. I, I just don't. I, I don't know how not to. So for me, repent means this. I acknowledge that I have a desire for titties. You know what I mean? Like, I, they're good and, and I, and I like them, but I also want the Lord and I want to honor my wife. And so for me to repent is for me to say, "Lord, I was exposed to a lot of things whenever I was really young and I didn't know who you were and I don't know how to unwant titties. I don't know how not to want those, Lord God." And then it's like a surrender that says, "Teach me your way." And then what he'll do is he'll, it's up to us to partner in action in our faith and he'll say, "Okay, I'm going to draw this boundary and he'll know and he'll say, no social media." And it'll be like, I'm, he's going to teach me his ways and it'll be a, a short B. Okay, no social media and I, I'll know it's him. There's just this thing that allows you to know it's him and so I commit and I partner with him in that little thing and that's how I believe and then he, in his strength, because I was obedient and I partnered at action, and I've committed action to my faith, then he'll allow me to take another step. And then listen, and the, the beautiful part about grace is I'm going to fall short again. And not because I want to, just because I, he's teaching me his ways. It's called being sanctified. Not instantaneously, but a process that lasts forever. So, as I run into another roadblock and it's, it's, I have the social media and I have the whole block, but now I meet a girl at an AA meeting and she offers to show me her titties and I'm like, please, 'cause I don't know how to say no in that moment, right? I'm just being honest. Like, I, I'm trying to make it as, I'm not trying to lie to you. I'm trying to make it as realistic as possible because as soon as you say I'm not going to do this, it's going to, they're going to, it's going to be one-upped. And so then I'm going to partake in the visual and then I'm going to go back because I've grown with the Lord and I'll find myself in another place of repentance as my sanctification increases and I'll say, "Lord, when that girl walked up and asked me, I couldn't even say no. There's something in me that took over that just thought doom, doom, titties and I couldn't get past the thought. Lord, help me." And he'll say, "Okay, don't be alone with a woman from now on." You get it? And then it'll be up to me to partner. You get what repentance looks like? It's a process. But it's not the forgive me, Lord. Forgive me, Lord. The forgive me before I masturbate, Lord. You know, everybody's experienced that. Like when you first start walking, Lord, you're like, I'm never going to do this again. And then it gets over you. It overcomes you in the shower. I'm like, Lord, you're going to have to forgive me for this one. You know what I'm talking about. But that's, that's not repentance. Repentance is admitting that I want to and I don't know how not to. And that's the okay part. If you knew how to, you wouldn't do it in the first place. Right? So that's repentance. Surrender. Lord, I don't know how not to want these things. I lived 38 years of my life however I wanted to. Teach me, God. Teach me and show me. And then his grace allows for that next time when I fall short. And then I go back crying, Nick, when he comes back and he's just like, "Lord, just help me, God. I don't know what to do. If I would have known, I wouldn't have left. If I would have known right in that moment, but sometimes I can't say no." It's, and that part is the process of sanctification.
What if it's this? Who here feels like they were with the Lord and then they fell away? What if the whole entire time, check this out, what if the whole entire time it's part of sanctification? What if you never actually fell away? What if it's all been a part of this process? You're getting better now. That's the whole part. It, what if all of this, even right now, up to this very moment, you're being sanctified. And it's begun the moment you truly said yes to Jesus.
What shared last month so much? How many do you know? Well, let, let me, let me say something real quick and I'll jump over to you. Uh, Goose. Oh, you're not Goose anymore. Wow. You're Stephen. No more Goose. How about that? Uh, so check this out. Earlier I said me and my wife this morning, we started praying for him and his wife, right? What you don't know is when I was coming home from the gym, in my mind, I had him protesting and I got to say some things about kidnapping his kids to him and then I had to process through and re-surrender that to Jesus to get to the place where then me and my wife could pray for him. You know what I'm saying? It isn't super spiritual. I'm like, "Oh Lord, pour out your anointing." It's more like, "Let me, okay, God." So, I was telling Cody, it's like I, all these people, you know, these fellows on Facebook that talk all this good game. It's got to where I'm like, Lord, I know I'm a peacemaker now, so just don't let them talk. Just let them come swinging. Just let them come swinging because if they swing, I can react and I don't have to be a peacemaker. But I know that's not real because then I catch a glimpse of myself in the target mirror and I'm like, ain't nobody coming swinging on me. It just ain't going to happen. You know what I mean? So it's, it's like, it sounds easy. It sounds like it's this, you're just all of a sudden super spiritual. It is not. Like I want to be like him. I want, I want revival in the hearts of men and in the city. And so it's a, it's a, it's this pendulum of of laying down my life. Laying down my life so that I can look more like him. And that's what, that's what the process will be. And that's the learn, that's the hard part. The laying down my life is learning how not to touch it. Right? The laying down my life is learning not how to respond. And it's part of that process. It's a whole lot of repentance. It's not just one and done. It's a process of it. What do you got, Stephen? One of the things really, Yeah, his great, listen, his grace never, even in the midst of being at war with God, his great Christ's blood prevails. Yeah. Have your way, Lord. Just don't kill him. Absolutely. Listen, it. Sanctification is a brutal process. And this is what I'll tell you. Like, who here is younger than 38? You're already so much further along than I was. You get it? Like, you look at all that God's done in my life in a short amount of time in six years, and you're already further ahead than that. I didn't, I didn't get it till I was 38. If you're one year younger than that, you're more advanced than I was. You have the ability to do bigger, greater, and more advanced things than I ever will. You get it? How old are you, Matt? See, listen, old dogs can learn new tricks, huh? But you see what I mean? Like, it took. So, listen. So, every time a young guy walks out, I have so much grace for him because there's no way. Listen, there's no way at 21 you would have kept me in here. There's no way I would have let. I was too smart for something like this. I knew everything. You know what I mean? And I had an attitude. So just be encouraged. Like, look, this program is not the solution. It just helps. The solution is Jesus Christ, hands down. Everything else is a toolkit to help maintain that fellowship on a daily basis. One minute at a time. Now, we'll lay out a foundation of a good father. What a good father would do for you. We're going to teach you a trade. We're going to teach you how to do your medical. We're going to teach you how to do your dental. We're going to try to get you good place at a good job. We're going to try to set you up for success just like a good dad would. That's really what this is. We're going to teach you how not to ever use again. And we're going to give you the best part of what Christ gave us. But it's all up to you to receive it. You got to choose to grab on to it. You've got to want it.
Next scripture real quick. Oh, wait, I got to finish that one. I just, I started, I said repent. It says repent then and turn to God. So listen, the return to God is that moment of surrender, right? Repent. Everybody says to turn away from. It's like, listen, as soon as I look at my sin and I look at him and I choose him, I, that's the turn. And then I just surrender the inability to overcome my sin on my own. Self-control is a fruit of the spirit, not a fruit of the flesh. So the more you try not to do it and white-knuckle it, the more you're destined to fail until you get open, honest, and transparent first with men and then with God and then he can cleanse us of all unrighteousness so that your sins may be wiped out that times of refreshing may come from the Lord. Listen, that whole thing where I say, "Lord, I just want you." And I weep and I cry and I ball and I'm in worship and I realize how unworthy I am, but he loves me. That thing makes me whole again. I don't know what it is about it, right? And I, I chase after that. I'll chase after that in the hard times because I know if I can get there, I'm just a knucklehead who can't see what I need to repent from. I'll just get to chasing him, wanting it, wanting until he can fully expose me to me. And I'm always the culprit. Always.
Isaiah 1:18 says this, "Come now, let us settle the matter, says the Lord. Though your sins are like scarlet, they shall be white as snow. Though they are red as crimson, they shall be like wool." Listen, who believes that God is God? Raise your hand if you truly believe that God is God. Okay, then when he says, "Come now, let's settle it." It's kind of final. Just, it's the come now. Lay it out there. Let's settle it. Let's be done with it so we can move forward. So that you can be made new. So you can be transformed. Right? Baptismo. It means pickled. So we get pickled and not alcohol pickled. For some of you old heads, you know what I'm saying? Y'all know you know what I'm talking about. I can tell by looking on your face. Transform. That's what the word, the word means. Transform. You go in a cucumber and you come out a pickle. Something completely different than when in the water.
Colossians 3:13 says this, "Bear with each other and forgive one another." If you don't notice, listen, it'll give you an instruction and then give you the how to live it out. It'll give you an instruction. It'll give you how to live it out. It says, "Come now. Let's do this." And then it says, "Bear with each other because this is how I'm going to hang on to it. This is how I won't be tossed back and forth like a ship at sea by by taking action in my faith. I receive it. I come now. I settle it. And then he says, "Do this. Bear with one another. Forgive one another. And if any of you has a grievance against someone, forgive as the Lord forgave you." And you look back at Isaiah 1. He said, "Let's settle it. You're white as snow." So that's how he forgives. I don't forgive and then still treat you like I don't. I forgive and I treat you like you're brand new. To bear with one another means I come up underneath the weight of your burden to help lift you up in your time of need. That's the important part of the fellowship that Antoine was teaching about. I can't have, I'll have to do it or attempt to do it on my own unless I'm in fellowship. And in fellowship, somebody will bear under this with me.
Matthew 6:14-15 says, "For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins." This is where I ch, I'm not challenging the scripture. I'm challenging the translation. I'm challenging the translation. It says that he won't. This is what I'll say. If this is me and I'm full to the brim, how is there even room to receive his forgiveness? If he's giving you something, I have to receive it, right? That's going to take some space. Just like if I'm holding on to unforgiveness, bitterness, anger, resentments, it's going to take up some space. So, the challenge to the translation is this. If I'm full of all this crap, how can I even receive the gift? I have no place to put it. My pockets are full. You get it? To be able to forgive those other people means I've emptied out this cup and I have room for his forgiveness. I have room for his gift. I have room for all the fruits of the spirit so that they would manifest in my life.
Ephesians 1:7 says this, "In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sin in accordance with the riches of God's grace. In him we have redemption." It means all of those, those identities, all of the weights, all of the burdens, all of the, the stuff that makes us angry and, uh, temperamental and unhappy and jelly, jealous and envious. All of the things that make us those things are gone away so that I can experience love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, conditions, and self-control. Do you understand? That's what it is to be redeemed. To have redemption. It means I no longer am bound by this effect and it doesn't dictate who I am by because of the, a false identity. I've now been redeemed and made whole and complete and experience all of these and now you get to experience the new identity.
Grace. Just to touch on grace for for one quick second, it is inexhaustible. Listen, and if you need a living witness, everybody raised their hand. You can't do anything to exhaust it. As much as a pastor or preacher will shy away from teaching that, the truth is the only thing, the only thing that transforms me is his grace in the midst of my own orchestrated dysfunction. In the, in my own bad decisions, him loving me in those moments when I try to repent and I feel his presence is what transforms and changes my life. And it's the only thing that will do it. And look, I, I feel like most of us have learned how in the world to have a form of self-control and self-discipline. How'd that work out for you? You still ended up in this exact same place. His grace at our lowest moment. It says the goodness of God will lead to repentance. Another place is godly sorrow leads to it. For me, godly sorrow is that thing whenever I see the face of Jesus, I realize I've been in conflict and I surrender once again. And in that moment, it's his goodness. So even on that scripture, it's still his goodness. Because I, I, I feel a certain level of disconnect or shame or however you want to phrase it, whatever it is that lets me know that I'm not walking fully. Stephen said it, I know there's a part of me that's been called to do some things and I'm not doing it and that he sees it and so there's a little bit of that godly sorrow, but whenever Jesus shows up next to him in the midst of it, that goodness is what's going to lead him to repentance. Only in our lowest moments can I receive it because we're knuckleheads. If it didn't take that, we would already, we wouldn't even be here. You wouldn't even be in this room.
2 Corinthians 5:17 says this, "Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come. The old is gone. The new is here." The new creation, the being pickled, the transformation. It means, listen, it means that if we are aware, if we can surrender and submit that he is good, that he bought us, that he's paid for us, that now we can walk according to his will and his purpose for our life, then it will allow me, it'll allow me to have freedom. Do we know where it came from? I hope he didn't pull the scene off the wall. The what? It's loose. Somebody tried to pull it open to put the napkins in it. I'm sure. What was it?
Hebrews 10:17 says this. It says, "Then he adds, their sins and lawless acts I will remember no more. It's done." Right? Christ said it. He said, "Uh, it is finished." If he said it, it's up to me to walk in it. That's it. Choose, believe, be sanctified. You're gonna, you're, listen, you're not ever going to find yourself at the end of the road where you don't have to grow. Not until you die. You'll constantly be in a place where I'm, I'm driving down the road thinking about what I would say about kidnapping somebody's kids and then have to re-surrender that thing so that I can then pray. You know what I mean? I'm just being honest with you. Like I go, look, y'all don't karate fight in your head. I always win. I'm the most violent. I'm the strongest. I'm the toughest in my own head. That's what it looks like. Ain't nobody whooping me in my own imaginary fight. That's just sick. Somebody has that. I don't even know how to process that one. We're going to get you some counsel. But in my own mind, I'm winning, right? But thank God for like coming back to myself. When I, and when I come back to myself, I realize who I desire to be and that there's not even a real anything between me and someone else. It's spiritual. Flesh and blood doesn't war against one another. And I have the ability then in that moment to surrender back to his image, confess that thing, talk about it a little bit and then begin to pray for the only thing that I know, the goodness of God showing up in the midst of my anger, resentments, violent mental crap. In those moments, I get to look more like him. And only in those moments.
Father God, I thank you for these men. Father God, I thank you for all that they're doing. Lord God, I pray that you speak to them as they write their list that they have to have tomorrow for my class. That you speak to them, Lord. That you draw out those things that make them sick. That you draw out those things that, that keep them in a constant state of insanity. That you would expose it and they would have a choice to let it go so that they would find the freedom that I found. Lord God, Jesus name I pray. Amen. Amen.