Transcription
If you're a smart woman over 40 and you are tired of being overlooked and disrespected at work, this is for you. Chances are you thought that if you just stayed polite and nice and stayed in your lane and didn't ruffle any feathers, you would eventually get rewarded, right? But you didn't, and you will not be.
Today, I'm going to show you exactly how smart women stop being nice and start getting noticed. So, if you have ever felt invisible or if you feel invisible right now, I'm going to give you exactly what you need to step out from those shadows. Today, I'm going to give you three communication moves that are going to change everything for you without you having to change who you are or how you communicate or be somebody that you are not or don't want to be. These moves will make you impossible to overlook. And if you are serious about reclaiming your power, hit that subscribe button right now because this is where smart women come to be seen and heard without having to compromise who they are.
Power move number one, speak in outcomes, not actions. So, here's the situation. You finish some project and somebody asks you, "Hey, did you get that report done?" Now, most people answer, "Yeah, I sent it in." and then they poof vanish from everyone's memory. That's because people don't remember actions, they remember outcomes. So speak in outcomes rather than actions and people will remember you. So instead of saying something like, "Yeah, I finished that and vanishing from everybody's memory." An outcome has three different parts to it. Number one, it has who benefits. Number two, it has what they have now. And number three, what they're going to do with that. So instead of saying, "Yes, I finished that report." You're going to say, "Yeah, the leadership team has the final proposal they need to get funded by Friday." Or, "Yes, the board now has the data they need to greenlight the next phase of this project." Outcomes get remembered. Actions do not.
And I get a lot of requests for custom phrases or solutions for specific problems that you might have that other people might not have. If you're looking for something like that, you might want to click on the first link in the description. It's a birthday special. Yes, it's my birthday and I'm offering something that I have never offered before. If you have a situation that you believe doesn't fit here, I could still help you with that.
Power move number two, clarify, restate, and hold the line. Unless it that you ask a colleague for something that they have to get you because you need it to move forward and they give you some answer like maybe you should check with Mark or I'm not really sure that's my responsibility. And now you're left standing there feeling like you're asking some big favor or like you're imposing on somebody when you're simply trying to complete your job and you're asking somebody else to do theirs. And I know how that feels where then later on you go home and you don't just go home by yourself anymore. If you hang on to this and don't resolve it, you go home with that person. And so instead of watching movies that night, let's say with your spouse, you're washing movies with that person and your spouse. You're washing dishes with that person and your spouse. You're lying in bed with that person between you and your spouse. So instead of bringing that person wherever you go with you, end it right there.
Here's how you can do that. Remember the phrase, "When I said this, I meant that." Here's what that sounds like. Mary, when I said I needed that code, I meant I needed that code from you right now. So I'll wait if you need to call Mark to get it. You might need to say something such as, "See, Mary, when I said I needed to get access to that drive, what I meant was I need you to get me access to that drive right now. So, if you need to get that from, let's say, it that's okay. We can walk down there together and then we can finish this up right now. What do you say?" And don't leave until you get what you need. Remember, when I said this, I meant that. Don't let people throw you off message.
One of the easiest ways to do that is to use the broken record. So, if Mary were to say something like, "Well, I can't really give you that access. I'd have to go to it." And that's going to take a while. Well, again, Mary, I understand that. But when I said I needed to get access to that drive, I meant I need you to give me access right now. So, if what you mean is you need to go down to it to get that approval, let's walk down there together so that we can wrap this up right now. What do you say? And if she says, "Well, I don't really have time right now." Well, when I said that I needed access, I meant I needed it from you right now. So, what do you say we walk down there together so that we can wrap this up? What do you say, Mary? Mary, what do you say? Once you start engaging with other people, you're finished. You're doomed. You are not going to get what you need. you have now succumbed to them and their power. So instead of doing that, the next time you feel like walking away and the next time you feel frustrated when you walk away, remember you can always turn around and walk back. You can always pick up the phone and call back. If you forget something on the spot, as soon as you remember it, go back and use it. Don't bring these people home with you. No one will want to be around you anymore. That's the worst part.
And power move number three, elicit that you are sitting in a meeting and before the meeting's over, everybody's about to go, but you have not yet said what you had to say. So if that happens to you a lot, start telling people very clearly what the value is that you're bringing and why it matters. For example, instead of saying something such as, "Wait a minute, before we leave, I have an idea that I'd like to share." What people want are things that will serve them. So, tell them what you're going to give them and how it's going to serve them. Simple. So, instead of saying something like, "Wait a minute. I have an idea." Which no one wants. You're going to say something more like, "Hold on. I have a solution that could save us 2 weeks of work if we implement it before we finalize this." Set up your ideas by telling people what they are and how it will serve them. Are they answers? Are they solutions? Are they proposals? And what will those answer, solutions, or proposals do for them? If you don't tell them that, they're never going to hear it. And then you can't blame people for not wanting them. We have to give people the opportunity to appreciate what it is that we're bringing to the table. And to give people the opportunity to do that, you have to tell them what it is. Because if you don't tell them, who will.
You do not have to change who you are or the style that you have to be considered to be powerful. All you have to do is be more specific in what you're bringing to the table. And if you would like some help putting these moves into action, make sure to click on that first link in the description because I'm offering personal smart coaching now that I've never offered before. And I could help you with some specific challenges that are unique to you. Or I could help you expand on what we talked about here today and apply it to your specific situations so that you can start getting some relief and start being seen and respected at work because you deserve that. And remember that no matter what you implement, no matter how you decide to become more powerful and more seen, there's nothing that you have to say that you can't say in a more loving, respectful, compassionate way. And if you'd like to know some specific strategies of women who do not explain themselves at work when they're asked to or when they're called to task, check out that video because that's what you'll learn there. Okay, I'll see you inside.