Transcription
Have you ever wondered if what you were saying in your videos is the real reason you can't get more views and you're struggling to make money from your content? Well, I think it might be because recently over 1,800 creators applied to be roasted by me on this channel. And most of them were making the same scripting mistakes that put off viewers.
So, what I'm going to do today is review three of these channels. And I'm going to show you how to fix their scripting problems using some tricks that have generated me millions of views and millions of dollars over the last 5 years.
So, this is Dave. So, what I'm going to do is I'm going to play a bit of his video and then I'm going to point out the really big issues with it that's going to slam those views and sales. And then I'm going to rewrite it to show you exactly how to fix it.
What the studies show and what real life experience says is that people choose the adviser that they like the most, the one that they feel the connection with, right? You already know this. It's the one who makes them feel seen and understood. The one who actually understands who they are. And one of the simplest ways to create that connection early on is to ask better questions and to go deeper sooner. Because when you ask the right questions, you you're not just gathering facts. You're building trust that proves that you understand them. That's the key thing. This idea of understanding the other person from their point of view. That is so so valuable. We can learn the the things that help help us do that. And I talk about that a lot on on our channel here.
But most advisers, they start the meeting with small talk, which is normal. You know, hey, where do you live? What do you do? What's the weather like over there? But here's the truth. If you if you want to build trust, small talk's not going to cut it. At least um not an extended period of small talk. You've got to go deeper and you you have to do it faster.
All right. So, now let's break down the problems with this script that you maybe noticed, too. So firstly, if you want to generate sales and views from YouTube, you've got to give your viewers content that will warm them up to you. And you do that by giving them as much fantastic information as you possibly can. What that means is the first problem with this script is that even though the whole thing is 4 minutes long, I turned it into a four-line tweet that will have exactly the same impact as the entire video. And it basically said the exact same thing you did, but much faster.
thing is sometimes videos are not supposed to be deep dives and they are supposed to give just a bit of information. So what you need to learn to do write in a way that makes a little bit of information incredibly powerful. Now I'm going to show you how to fix this problem in my rewrite. But let's look at the final problem which is this. So according to something called the picture superiority effect, people retain 10% of information they hear and 65 of information that they hear when it's paired with a mental image. So this script is really forgettable because he's just listing stuff so they're only going to remember 10%.
So what I've done is I've rewritten this point from the video and I'm going to read it to you now and then break it down step by step to show you how I overcome all these problems and you can too. Okay, so let's start with the real reason clients are choosing a competition over you. And to do that, let me ask you a question. Have you ever walked into an elevator and thought, "Wow, I love this song." And by the time you got to your floor, you felt so uplifted because of it. Excuse the pun. No, of course not. Because elevator music's sole purpose is just to fill a silence so it's less awkward when you're in there with a stranger. It's not to win a Grammy. But imagine if they played your favorite song instead. You'd be dancing all the way down to that tune that makes you feel incredibly motivated and ready to take on the day. Meaning by the time you got to your floor, your mood would have been entirely lifted. The reason you're losing sales is because your calls are like elevator music to your prospect's ears. Just noise filling in an otherwise awkward silence. The competition, however, is stealing all of your business because they know how to overcome this to create an experience that raises their prospect's mood like their favorite song, so they're primed to say yes every time.
So, that's just the first chunk, but let me ask you a question. When you listen to that, did you picture yourself walking into an elevator, maybe the doors shut behind you, and then think about how awkward it is when you're standing there in silence with a stranger? Right? If you did, I heard you listening to me. But also, if we'd use this script, when one of his viewers goes to take their next sales call, they're going to go, "Wait, what was I supposed to do on this call?" They're going to go, "Oh, yeah, elevator music. Don't do small talk." So, if you want to make something more memorable, what you want to do is you want to try and relate it to a common situation that everyone understands in a visual way. And then just see what happens.
Okay. So, now let's read the next line of my script, which is this. And studies have shown if you can lift a potential buyer's mood in this way, they're 342% more likely to buy. But how do you create that experience on a call? So, let's break down what's going on with these two lines that are incredibly powerful.
Okay, so not every viewer is actually going to have the appetite for surreal visual situations like I just wrote about an elevator. So, what you need to do is through testing work out if your viewers hate or love it. And then kind of to what extent you can push it, but to play it safe, what I did was this line here, I threw in a scientific fact that backed this emotional situation up with some logic so the fun police go, "Oh, it's not just a dumb tail. It's legit and then they're satisfied too. But then this is the important part. So remember I told you about raising and releasing tension. Right now the tension in this script is low because the point is made. The viewers get it. So what we need to do when that happens is instantly raise that tension again so that they don't leave and they want to stick around and listen. And I do that by simply setting up the question I think they are likely to be asking to themselves at this point which is but how do you create that experience on a call? Boom. tensions back up, viewers listening, and then after that, we would just move on to give the steps and information. But that one section of script has now made the value of this video higher and more than just a tweet before we've even got to the instructions. It kept attention high and it's memorable.
So, let's move on to the next contestant. Oh, and if you want to have your content reviewed, you can join my mailing list below and I'll email my list every time I do one of these.
Okay, so this is the home boss and what I'm going to do is I'm going to play an excerpt from this video called seven mindset ships that helped me succeed on Amazon KDP when everyone said it was too late. And then I'm going to show you how to fix one of the biggest scripting problems in it that makes people feel confused and bored and that's just going to wreck your views and sales. So here's the clip from the video. First one is your influences shape your beliefs. Let's start with a simple but powerful exercise. Grab a notebook or a piece of paper and write down five names of someone who influences you right now. It could be someone in your real life or someone online, maybe a YouTuber you follow or someone you listen to on a podcast or a friend that you talk to often. And under each name, write five words that describe them. Once you've done this, these 25 words are a reflection of what you are absorbing every day. And now ask yourself, are these the kinds of people who encourage growth, possibility, and creativity? Or are they constantly negative, scared, or stuck? If the voices around you are always saying things like KDP is dead or don't even bother anymore, that will slowly shape how you think and how you act.
Okay. So, let me ask you a question. At what point did you switch off and stop caring? So, for me, it was here when you said under each name, write five words that describe them. Why? Well, because you didn't start by setting up any kind of problem that doing this activity fixes. So, I was like, "Wait, why do I need to do this list of instructions? What's it going to do for me?" Basically, this video is like reading an IKEA desk build sheet without knowing why you need a desk. So, it kind of feels pointless.
So, what I'm going to do is I'm going to rewrite the entire point to show you how to make a viewer care about your instructions. Okay, so here we go. Just pay attention to how you feel listening this. Do you ever feel like your friends and family don't really care about your business? When I started out, I was so excited. I talked to everyone I knew about it, but they'd always just ignore me or try to talk me out of doing it because they didn't think it was a great idea. And it got to the point this lack of support and negativity was leaving me to question if maybe I should just quit.
Okay, so that's the first few lines of this rewrite. But what I've done here is I've set up a problem that the viewers will have too because everyone feels like this no matter what business they're in. And when you do something like that, what it does, it hooks the viewer cuz they go, "Yeah, that's happening to me." But it also makes you very relatable cuz you're admitting you had their problem, too. So you build a bond with the viewer through this kind of vulnerability. But more importantly, it's letting people know what the problem this point is likely to fix is so they care about what comes next.
All right, so let's move on to the next part of the rewrite. But the next day, I was listening to a podcast from someone in the space. And I noticed how afterwards I felt so uplifted and motivated to continue. And that's when I realized how important it is to surround yourself with people who inspire growth, not hold it back.
Okay. So, just like the last contestant, what I've done is I've thrown in a bit of proof that this advice works by saying it did in the story so that they will then be more willing to listen to a set of instructions. But at the same time, I've released all the tension by saying, "Surround yourself with people who inspire growth." So, the point is made. Now, if I'm honest, you probably don't need the instructions that follow because the viewer is going to go, "Okay, I get it and I understand how I could solve this problem myself." But if you did want to put in the instructions, you would just say something like this. So if you're lacking motivation or feeling like you want to pack it all in, try this simple system. Something like that, right? So what you can learn from this script is start your lesson by setting up the problem your viewers have too, so they know why the following information matters. Then give them some proof it works quickly. And then just list your instructions. And doing it this way means they'll care and believe they can work, too.
Which brings us on to our next contestant. So, this is Laura, and she wrote into Uncle Ed to say her problems getting sales and views. So, without asking her, I went and picked out a random video on her channel to see if the script might be putting prospects off. And guess what? Definitely is. And this this is one of the most common issues out there. It's so hard to solve, but when you watch me solve it, you're going to go, "Oh my gosh, when you point this out, it's so obvious." And then you're going to realize you do it, too. and you're going to feel like you need to draw my mailing list so I can review yours in another video, too.
All right, so I'm going to play a small section of this video, not all of it, cuz well, you'll see why. But what I want you to do, second you feel your brain zone out or get a bit confused or bored, note when it happens. The more you can spot this, the better you'll get writing. So, what exactly is a dividend? Well, a dividend is basically just money that you're getting paid for owning part of a company. That is it. No hustle, no extra work, no out there slogging long hours. You literally are just getting paid for ownership in a company by investing by holding a piece of that company and it's their way of saying thanks. So this is the lazy person's side hustle because unlike actual side hustles, there is no hustle involved in getting paid dividends. If you buy a company that pays out a dividend, then every month or every quarter you will receive that income. Whether you are traveling with your besties, whether you're fast asleep or just chilling on the couch watching Netflix, it is a really awesome extra source of income. So, why exactly do companies give you free money? Because it sounds kind of wild, right? But here's exactly why it's legit. So, big companies like Apple, Coca-Cola, they make a lot of extra money. And so they want to send out part of those profits to their shareholders which will be you when you start investing to really say thank you for believing in the company. Thank you for staying loyal and also to demonstrate to the financial markets and to other investors that we are a really solid company with very strong projections for our future growth. So a company paying out dividends is a real from the overhyped startup companies who might be making massive growth but do not have the money to actually reward their investors which all right.
So here is the big issue with this script. I've just written my own version which is on the left and Laura's is on the right. Can you see how many more words she used to say the exact same information? If I can say it in that many lines, viewers are definitely going to get bored and confused and say, "Hurry up and move on."
So, now let me go a bit deeper on this issue before I show you the rewrite. So, in Laura's script, she says this. So, let's get into it. What exactly is a dividend? Well, a dividend is basically just money that you're getting paid for owning part of a company. That's it. No hustle, no extra work, no outsting on hours. You are literally just getting paid for ownership in a company by investing, by holding a piece of that company. And it's hopefully you can see where I'm going with this. Just think about tension and releasing tension here. When you say, well, a dividend is just money that you're getting paid for owning part of a company. You don't need to then say you are literally just getting paid for owning part of a company again because you literally just said that two lines ago. But this is way more serious than you think because when you overexlain things like this and labor a point, you lose credibility because do you know who else overexlains things? Liars. So, we got to get your script so much more refined and memorable.
Now, I'm not going to go over her entire script and show you the massive rewrite cuz it will go on for too long. But here's my rewrite of that small section that I just read to you. See if you can work out what I did using all of the lessons from this video so far. Okay. So, what's a dividend? Well, imagine this pie is all of the profit Coca-Cola makes a year. This slice of the pie is just money they give back to the people who have invested in their stock every month or quarter. That's a dividend.
Now, I didn't bother reviewing the intros of these scripts, even though they're probably the most important part of this whole process because I did it in this video here. So, click on that to learn how to avoid the most common intro mistakes. And if you want me to review your own channel, click the link below.