How to let go so deeply your desires chase you

Why is it enlightened people say that one of the secrets of our reality is that when we become empty, we become one with everything? Why is it that Dr. Joe Despensza at his live events talks about becoming nothing to then become one with everything?

What if the key to you experiencing your dream life is more about allowing you to flow through? What if there are three shifts that change everything for you? I'm going to show you how this has transformed my own life and allowed more success to come in the last month than the last two years. I have friends reaching out to me asking me what happened. My YouTube channel and everything I put out in the world is is growing very quickly. And this video I'm going to show you step by step what to do, step by step how to do it, and how it will completely transform your life from this point moving forward.

The first thing to understand is when you go from closed to open energetically, your whole reality will begin to shift. This is something literally that I have had people in my life reaching out to me for, texting me, asking me what was the shift for you because now things are working so easy for you. And I shared a couple ideas with some friends that completely has transformed the way they're showing up. And I think this can also be something that you use in your life as well.

Now, first off, let me explain a little bit of where I was to where I'm at right now. Just a few months ago, the focus of mine was on the outcome of wanting to grow my mission, wanting to grow on YouTube. And there was this energy where I was doing a lot of different things. I was doing and running live events, posting that on YouTube. I was hot seat coaching people, posting that on YouTube. I was going live on Instagram and turning those into YouTube videos. And then what I recognized inside of myself is there was so much focus on the outcome. It was like there was a lot of resistance. Things were on a pedestal. It was really important in a way. I was trying to manipulate people that watched me. I was trying to manipulate reality to give me what I wanted. So if I wanted views, it's an outcome. And I want something without giving anything.

Now the way reality works is reality reflects back to us the energy we put out. And the energy that I was putting out was a selfish energy. It was, "I want, I want views. I want to grow my mission." Part of it, you could say, "I want to grow my mission so I could reach more people," and all these things. But this is where the block was and this is where the shift was. Are you ready for it? You ready?

So the shift was I remembered that when I used to have a nine-to-five job selling women shoes, there was a big shift that happened. This shift was I remember one day going into work, the focus was on making money because it was a commission sales-based job. I'd wear a suit to work. I'd sell women shoes. And I only got paid a reflection of how much shoes I sold, a certain percentage. So I could clearly see when I went into work and I was in a certain energy, I could see which days I did better and which days I did worse. And I recognized one day that when I went into work and when I focused on wanting to sell $5,000 worth of shoes so that I could make my $500 in commission, there was a lot of pressure. There was a lot of resistance. It's like subconsciously people could feel that I wanted something from them.

And then I would go into work and practice this other much more light energy. I would go into work with the intention of having fun. I would go into work with the intention of connecting to people. I'd go into work with the intention of getting better and better at like showing different shoes. Like even though it was selling women's shoes was the most passionate thing for me, I'd focus on getting a little bit better every day. And what would happen is I would have the best days. There's an open energy. And guess what? When I was in an open energy, I would sell a lot more. Wasn't the ego desire like, "I have to sell $5,000 worth of shoes today to make it worth it coming in." Instead, it was opening.

So, what I did recently is recognize. So, if you look at my nine-to-five job, it was serious. I was attached. Then I moved to fun expression. I'd actually focus on having fun and showing my personality, like joking around with customers. Even though some of these customers were super successful and rich, and I would sometimes feel kind of small helping these people with their black American Express cards, but I'd give myself permission to have fun, to express the real me, not be attached. Result: success.

Okay, now let's take this to YouTube. Nowadays, for 2 years, my goal was getting to the next level. I wanted to not just be YouTuber Aaron Dowy. I wanted to be beyond that. So, I'm like, "I need to run lots and lots of live events if I ever want to be at the same like level as some of these people I look up to." And then what I also did is I stopped teaching. I just started coaching people. Now, this thing, I still enjoy coaching people even to this day, but I stopped teaching like I'm doing right now. I stopped the thing that got me to where I was. So, in a way, we'll talk more about that in a minute and then in a little bit when we talk about the flip, which will completely flip the way you see this, the way you relate, and allow you to let go so deeply. But first off, understand that like reowning who I was and having fun with who I was because that's what's more authentic was part of the key to this. So as I focused on teaching, having fun, I went to expression in these videos.

Now the difference is now in these videos instead of focusing a couple months ago on views and trying to get like, you know, trying to basically get what I want out of reality. I realized that the key to this was instead. Now, this is what I focus on now, baby. I focus on having more fun in my videos. I focus on connecting ideas together in a more powerful way. I focus on how can I tell better stories? Now that the energy is flowing through more, I'm having more fun. I'm connecting ideas. Things are growing more than ever. So, ironically enough, things grow for you. The key, the missing key might be focusing on opening instead of contracting by allowing the energy to flow through and focusing on the process. Focusing on the process of how you're showing up.

So, when I was talking to my friend recently about this, talking to my best friend about this, and I was talking about how I've reowned YouTube, I've started having fun with the process again. For two years, I rejected who I was because I was trying to get somewhere else. And instead, what I realized is I'm going to reown this. Have fun with it. Focus on adding value and getting better as a speaker. I thought the only way for me to get better as a speaker is I need to be on front of a stage with a whole bunch of people in the unknown, coaching people. And what I've realized now is the energy can completely shift because I'm focused more on getting the reps in and connecting ideas in a new way. And I can do that here without having to put all the production into a live event. I'll still run live events, but it won't be because I have to because of content. Think about the attachment that comes, by the way, when it's like every time I run an event, I'm like, "I have to get a whole bunch of content here. Every one of you is a ploy, is a part of my process to help me get the content that I need," instead of letting go.

Now, you know what's funny? It's going to be so funny to you, you're going to laugh so hard. This last live event I did, guess what I focused on? I got all the people together and I said all the the volunteers, I was like, "Guess what the focus of this event is. You ready?" I said, "The focus of this event is having fun." I was going to say letting go, but I was like, "Just let, just have fun." That's the intention. I'm going to have fun. You have fun. Then that trickled around. Everyone's having fun. We're like, we're all just having so much fun. As a side effect of having fun, guess what happened? Content was lit. Content was great. It was epic. I'm probably not even going to use that content on social media because I'm having so much fun making whiteboard videos. I don't need to do it no more. But the content is legit. You'll never know. But there's content on those SIM cards that are legit. And instead of 80% coaching, by the way, it's like 80% teaching and 20% coaching, which to me was way more fun. I got to express ideas like this. I got to use my handy-dandy whiteboard. Can you imagine how abandoned my whiteboard felt for two years just sitting in my closet? "Aaron, come get me." Like, "No, I'm on a mission to become more. You are not important to me." Ridiculous, right?

So, anyways, the big shift, how do you let go so deeply that reality shifts? The first one, here you go. It's moving from outcome to process, having fun with the process, focusing on who you are becoming. Now, even when I think, by the way, this one idea too I think could shift your life. This one idea is completely what allowed me to go from working a nine-to-five job to being a YouTuber, and it's what allowed me to go from a mediocre nine-to-five job go to an above-average nine-to-five job go. Here's what it is. I realized that the version of me that was the top seller at selling women shoes and the version of me that was a full-time YouTuber, these versions of me, I would imagine what that version of me would think, feel, and act like, and I would model their behavior. So, the top-selling version of me would greet every customer. I imagine this. And instead of selectively finding customers you think they could buy, I'd greet every customer. Instead of bringing out one shoe, the shoe they asked for, I'd bring out two or three other shoes. Would take some vulnerability and courage to say, "You asked for this one." But get off the pot, lady. Uh, that was an energy. And then I would, I would just go above and beyond. And then very shortly also my self-image prior to that was average sales employee. After a little bit above average. No, it was above average. It was like one of the top two or three people in my department. Some of the people I worked with did like sold shoes for like 20 years. So story, why but I wasn't really they were passionate about shoes. Okay, just so you know.

Let me explain this to you. YouTube version of me makes daily videos. That version, not daily videos, but makes content. That version of me is constantly focused on how can I share better concepts? How can I teach new ideas? Even throughout my day now I walk around thinking about like, I'll have an idea and I'm like, "Oh, write that down. I'm going to share that in my video. I got to piece it together with the title that I give you and like, how am I going to express this content?" And that allows it to flow through. So it's like it's who you become. I know it says becoming nothing, but it's also about who you become. And part of becoming nothing is becoming the something that you thought you were. We'll get there in a minute. Okay, but just wait for a sec.

Okay, who's ready for the second? You ready for a little dopamine hit here? Now, the second flip that will change everything is understanding how you can own who you are and what makes you different. Kind of alluded to this a little bit in the first one, but this is what I was talking to my friend about just two days ago when he was noticing that things are growing for me. There's a different alignment and aliveness about me. And he's like, "What shifted?" And I was explaining to him that one of the things that shifted for me is for a long time, even on YouTube, I felt like I was in a box because the views of the thing that had done well was about attracting love. That's all I talk about is attracting love. And I started feeling like in a box. Like, "I want to talk about this no more. I want to talk about something else." So what I did is I realized that I was in a way judging. There's two levels to this. I was judging the past version of myself that would talk about esoteric concepts that I thought were kind of like ungrounded. And I stopped making videos on ways of explaining how reality works in a deep way, talking about different energy dynamics that are a little bit more esoteric. And I kind of stopped. I abandoned, once again, I abandoned my whiteboard. And then I abandoned my past self. I started talking about like, I, I had a gravity for like me being authentic, having fun, and then it was like I veered off to what was getting the outcome and the views, and I would rationalize it because that's what works. Then I can bring people in and like teach them other ideas. But what I've realized is I abandoned the content I was actually passionate about. And actually, I'm reowning my core, which was I got well-known on YouTube for making these whiteboard videos. And I was telling my friend this, and my friend is also a YouTuber. His name is Victor, and he makes these videos on YouTube, did for years, on what are called full moon energy updates. And he doesn't know astrology at all. Not really, just a little bit. He mainly just talks about the themes of what he recognizes is happening in people's lives through his clients, etc. And he just got an intuitive pulse on it. So it's not like, "Mercury is in retrograde," or whatever, and then he's like, "This is what it means." It's not that at all. He notices themes in his life, his family's life, his friends' lives, and he'll share what's coming up. And the idea of the full moon is like an amplified energy. These full moon energy update videos he puts out would get 50,000 plus views every video he put out. He stopped putting them out like two years ago. Why? He started to judge himself. He started to say, "Oh, it's ungrounded. It's a..." There was... He stopped doing. He stopped being himself. He stopped talking about esoteric things like spirit guides and third eye and these things that he used to talk about, and he started just focusing on like other things. And when I was talking to him, I was explaining to him like, "Yeah, I'm reowning the things I used to talk about, and I'm just recognizing I can own it in a way that's authentic to me." So even though sometimes talking about raising vibration, you get an energy of like, "You're going to raise your vibration, you're going to think better thoughts, you're not going to feel negative emotions." I'm like, "I don't want you to think that that's what I believe, because I don't. It's different." Okay. You're not suppressing your emotion. You're allowing yourself to like feel and heal and going deep. But I'm like, "I can make raising vibration cool again." And with my friend Victor, I'm like, "You can make these full moon energy updates cool by sharing it in your own unique, unique, authentic way." When I was telling him this, he had a huge light bulb moment, and just light energy just shot down from the heavens into him. He's like, he started like hyperventilating. I'm just kidding. He just, he just was like, "Dude, this is so crazy that you said this." He's like, "I've been feeling this. I wanted to make a video on spirit guides the other day, but I thought it was too weird or esoteric, and I was judging it." And then I realized it's like a sign for him to like move back into his purpose, move it back into making videos in his old way. And it comes from owning yourself. And for me, I've been owning actually what makes me different. So instead of focusing on what do all these other people that I look up to do, and how they coach people, or how they do things, I'm like, "Wait, what makes me different?" Well, instead of me being a coach, that's part of what I do, but I like to teach. I like to connect ideas together. I like to have fun. I like to let this flow through. So, what I've done recently is I've owned teaching. I've owned old topics I used to stop talking about because of my own judgments. I've owned the personality I have, the way I express myself. It's not for everybody, but it's for some people. But also, I just have more fun making videos like this instead of like the cringiness of like certain talking about, "Here's how people choose you. Here's how to get them to chase you." Attract love content. I don't want to talk about. I'll probably talk a little bit about it, but in a way that I like to talk about in a little way, but it's not the core of this channel. I want to talk about things that I'm passionate about that allow the energy to flow through. Remember, one idea changes anything. You move from uh closed to open by letting the energy flow through. And if you start owning yourself, that also means accepting yourself, accepting you. And the degree to which I have accepted myself is the degree to which I realize other people are tuning into me again. I can't tell you how many people have DM'd me on Instagram and other places saying, "I haven't watched your videos in four years, but I'm watching your videos again. They're amazing." I'm like, "What? That's cool. I'm getting a lot of those messages. I'm a lot of people that are loving the funness and like the play in this, in these type of videos. This is my, this isn't my serious dojo where I have to like get certain things and, and like it's not that heavy energy. This is like a, like a little playground for me. It's my little fan castle. I get to make my drawings and throw you my drawings. You like my drawings, guys? I did it all by myself. Okay.

So, remember becoming nothing. When you hear Joe Despensza be, "become nothing" in his meditations space, what this really means is when you become nothing, you're letting go of your attachment to ego and your attachment in general. And then you're allowing yourself to become everything. And when you become one with everything, these things flow through because you are open. This is really what this video is about. You want to learn how to let go so deeply that like reality literally starts to obey you and resonate with you. You focus on trusting and opening. One of the most powerful ways to open is vulnerability. Sharing yourself. Now, here's the thing. Vulnerability is a practice of opening. When you think about it, I was coaching someone the other day where she was saying that like there's certain guys I'm around where I feel very contracted, and I feel like I'm on eggshells. And there's certain people I'm around where I feel very open in myself. And what's interesting is you probably have it in your life where there's certain people when you're around, you're just open. And then there's certain people around where you feel energy and you feel contraction, and it feels draining to be around them. Ultimately, there are certain people you give yourself permission to open around, and there's certain people that you just don't vibe with, or there's a block there to letting yourself be yourself. So when you begin to accept yourself and choose to open no matter what, that's the process of vulnerability. So that means expressing how you feel. That means uh expressing and like setting boundaries if you feel like it's necessary to set a boundary. So if you were to think about this in any powerful way that really shifts your life more than anything, realize opening is a process of vulnerability. Opening is a process of of allowing that vulnerability to flow through. Okay?

Now, stop forcing. Stop thinking the ego needs to control everything. Start allowing and focusing on the energy to flow through. This can mean taking action, but it means that it's coming from a different place than like trying to get somewhere else. Okay. Who's ready for the next dopamine hit?

So, we've got the outcome to the process. We've got owning you, accepting yourself, owning you. What makes you different? What makes you different? Allow yourself to embrace that. If you have something you're insecure about and you just own it, you're in a much more powerful way. Somebody asked me the other day, they're like, "I realize sometimes how shy I am when I'm around people." I said, "Just own being shy, baby. Own it. You own it. It's not a problem. You think there's something wrong with you. There is a problem."

Okay. Another dopamine hit of a new um of a new whiteboard page. Oh, no. Not this one. This is going to be a future video. Don't you even look at that one. Future video coming soon. This one is on the space and thinking less. This is about this one idea here also can completely shift your life and help you become aware that where you are, in some ways, what got you here won't get you there. That's sometimes true. I will argue also the opposite here in a moment. The level of consciousness that got you here is not the level of consciousness that gets you out of the problem. So this is the third thing to understand is that between in your vibration, there's the survival emotions of fear, anger, control, guilt. When you're in survival, it's also closing, contracted. You literally think a lion is chasing you. Okay? Your energy contracts. You don't have time or energy to get inspirational ideas. You don't get that of uh flow that comes through because you believe your ego must do. Creates a lot of resistance. The other side of this is flow, ideas flowing through, having fun, focusing on the process, being in the right place at the right time, synchronicity. So understand that this two energies right here is if you just focus on this alone, it can completely shift your life.

So recently what I've been doing is creating more space. I've recognized that the space of me and social media, me and television, and like other things, those things literally brainwash us to make us think that the uh digital world is the real world. But when we allow the flow to come through because we have more space, we're more clear. It's like there's a completely different level of presence that is there. So, one thing that I've been doing recently, if you look at this photo right here, this was my aura after two weeks of intentional consumption, much like 80% less screen time. My whole, my whole aura, like I, I felt different. And it was a complete life-transforming thing that I did a while ago that I'm now doing again. And I'm like, "Why do I keep forgetting to do this?" Take breaks from social media and consumption and watch how more present you feel. Watch how much more clarity you have. So thinking less has actually been the key to letting go in the sense that when you can observe your thoughts and let them be there, you're not trying to control. You're in a more free energy. And the neutrality. This right here, space and neutrality is the key here. Space and neutrality. Observing your thoughts, they're not good or bad, they just are. This was the biggest shift for me back in 2012. Learned how to observe my thoughts without trying to control. There was this spaciousness that was created inside of me. Literally started to feel different within two or three weeks. Got rid of uh smoking, drinking, taking Adderall. Like my whole life transformed because I was the things that used to have old momentum went away in the sense that I was able to observe them, let them be there, and that allowing allowed me to open.

So a lot of times what people do is they stay in contraction trying to solve the problem from the same level of consciousness the problem was created, which means you literally think a lion is chasing you when you express yourself. You literally think a lion is chasing you. So you keep doing, doing, doing, doing. But if you were to create space, you will then have more energy at your disposal. More energy coming towards you because then the divine can actually flow through you. It's like you're arguing with reality when you're attached. And when you're arguing with reality and staying attached, you're insisting that the ego does it. You're insisting that there's a force energy. There's an outcome dependence up here. It's more about the energy. So the degree to which you could focus on the energy is the degree to which you finally allow these things and the solution to these things to come into your mind too. Like even more recently for me as I've been more focused on making videos. So I said a minute ago that what got you here won't get you there. That's sometimes true, sometimes not true. The level of consciousness won't get you to the next level of consciousness. But for years, I thought that whiteboard videos weren't going to get me to the next level or something. Turns out what I've learned is what got me here can get me there. But where is there? What if right here right now is actually the destination? If you imagine it like 100% of my energy here, right now, I'm more present. That energy flows through. If you imagine, "I think I need to be someone else and I need to run all these live events, do all these things in order to like get content." It's, it's like 80% of me, but not 100%. Because it's resistant, it's control. It's trying to get somewhere else. And there's a lot of energy and heaviness there. But now that I've come back to my core, it's like there's more presence and flow through coming through. So realize that getting there is about letting go of the attachment to this level of consciousness and trying to figure it out from that level of consciousness. This level of consciousness won't get you here. It's going to require some space and neutrality. Observing it, letting it go, and trusting into the moment, having more fun, letting it be free. And when you do that, more divine energy will flow through. You will be more open. And that's why the flip for this episode, this video, the flip that will change your life in so many ways is very simple.

One, embrace the process. Embrace the process. Have fun with the process. Embrace the journey of who you become. Instead of trying to get over there, recognize this is about allowing the energy to be the focus. When the energy is the focus, all the results come as a reflection. When you are in the energy of having fun, you are more magnetic. When you are in the energy of adding value, you're more magnetic. When you're having the energy of "I'm going to get better at," you know, for me, sharing ideas or connecting things together in a new way. It's like I'm able to progress, and that to me is fun.

So secondly, the one thing may be the thing that gets you there. When you focus your energy on what you're passionate about, when you focus on owning who you are, it's about owning your energy, owning who you are. Stop trying to be like everybody else. What makes you different? Own it and recognize that if you accept you, you then don't need everyone else to accept you. That allows you to let go deeply.

And then thirdly, understand the flywheel effect. How one area of your life affects other areas of your life has a very powerful effect in life. It's why a lot of times people, by the way, I'm going to do a video on this deeper, by the way, but one, what, how often do you see where people are trying to attract love? They're trying to attract love. They're trying to attract love. That one area of their life of trying to attract love creates resistance because they're focused on it. They're trying to control it. We can't control relationships, though. So many times when you allow and you open up and you're vulnerable in that area of your life, you start to open up your energy. But then when you focus on another area of your life where maybe your purpose, having fun, friends, then as you open up there, this area of your life then begins to open the flywheel. These, these layers are connected. Like now that I'm in this energy of making videos in a way more authentic way, there are other areas of my life that are aligning beautifully because there is a lot of flow coming in one area. So if you're finding resistance in one area of your life, what you can begin doing is focusing on an area of your life where things are going well, feel gratitude, and let it overflow to the next layer.

Now, if you want me to, if you wanted me to do a video on the flywheel effect and show you how to apply that and completely transform your life from the inside out, go and comment below. Let me know. And also if you want a process to make this be natural for you. Now understand that you aligning with the reality that you want to be is about seeing it as natural. I have a future self meditation that is free for you to download. Let's do it for 21 days and allow you to see these things as natural, to let go of the outcome, and to allow that flow to come through. If you want it, I'll go ahead and link it below. You can check out that meditation. Let's do it for 21 days. Watch what happens.

And the next video I'm going to post right here is my most popular video of the whiteboard video series. It's on becoming so magnetic by vibrating higher to become unrecognizable. So, how to create out inside out transformation. Check this video out right here and watch what happens.