getting ready for a date

You're gonna Sango. She's trying to bait. She might just bust a wire for some sake. Just kidding, I don't want to do that. The only spreading I do usually involves a butter knife and some mayo. That came out wrong. I'm getting some weird visuals.

Wow, never in my life have I looked so much like a Karen. Did I hear margaritas? Oh my god, let's get shots. Huh. I've actually always wanted to do a "trick checker ready with me" video. And you know, today I'm getting ready for a date. So, you know, why not bust out the extensions for the occasion? Are they perfectly blended? No. Well, let's face it, neither is Happy All's Foundation. Huh. Well, hopefully my immaculately blended eyeshadow will make up for it. Make up for it. Actually, let me take that back real quick. I rarely use eyeshadow nowadays because some of these dates I've been on have not been worth the effort. I'm telling you, some of these people have been nothing but a waste of makeup.

One time, actually, I went out in London to a bar and I met this absolutely beautiful young chap. He, he was taller than me, his physique that of a Grecian God, and he had the softest lips, and he laughed at my jokes. So, you know, I was absolutely in love. We just had this very, like, strong attraction towards one another. The day after, we go on a date, you know, so we could plan our wedding, pick our baby's names, and, you know, just plan our future. Simply. I spend two and a half hours on makeup and hair, take an hour-long cab drive across the city so it's closer to him, and then he takes me to a fast-food restaurant. Mm-hmm. This man then proceeds to repeatedly critique my appearance and invalidate my career choices. Like, what? I did not spend all this effort to be roasted this hard. If I wanted a roasting session, I would have went to see my grandma. She doesn't have a dick.

So now I'm a new foundation. I always mix my foundations because my skin color changes drastically, you know, with the seasons. I'm using Clinique's Even Better in the shade Beige and I'm mixing that with the NARS Sheer Glow in Deauville. I really don't like this mechanism right here. I mean, lack of mechanism, I guess. I always overpour. I'm just dropping some of this on. Damn, I poured way too much. So with applying foundation, I've actually gone back to my like, OG, OG, like 2011 style of spreading foundation, which is just, I just scoop it into my fingers and then go like this. This is how it was done. I haven't done like, hardcore baking in years. I really enjoyed doing the. That's gross. Charlotte Tilbury Airbrush Flawless Finish powder. I just dab the same Beauty Blender into the powder and then start going all over the face to set the foundation.

Yeah, dating men. I didn't start dating until my 20s because in my teens, no one would even accidentally look in my direction. Others were going to parties and partaking in fornication-ary activities, but my favorite pastime was sitting by the train tracks and listening to death metal and eating cheese puffs alone. Like, yeah, I mean, look at this [ __ ]. Yeah, it just does that certain something. You, I look like someone named Paul. Let me just zoom back out.

But, you know, dating as a tall girl is interesting. I've had someone come up to my table and ask me if I want to dance, and when I stood up, they just walked off. And this other guy, one time, just said it straight to my face. He said the words, "You're too tall." Shh, my dude. Like, you're the size of a fire extinguisher, but it still shoots, don't it? I could carry you around in my purse. We could be adorable. You'd carry you on my shoulders at a Nickelback concert. Why do you have to ruin this for us? When it comes to dating, I do not discriminate. Fun fact though, I've never been with a Finnish guy. You know what they say. I like my men how I like my coffee: smuggled in the burlap sack through Central America on a donkey, doing a very light nose snatch. Snatch. Huge snatch. I'll just drop that word before I do my lashes.

I always pop my lash curler in my armpit for it to warm up a little bit because it keeps the curl up longer. Let's do some brow in the meantime. Then I went on this other date in New York, actually, with this fellow who was very handsome and he had a good job. You know, because I have a history of dating broke boys and I always end up being the person paying for [ __ ] and that just really got to me over the years. So I'm now trying this new thing where I'm trying to date people who are, you know, on the same level with me financially, I guess. I just realized how arrogant I sound right now. Not really much to complain about. I liked him, he had a cool life, but at the end of the day, he told me that he has a foot fetish. So I don't like kink. Shane, like, you can like what you like, but it's not for me. And I didn't know how to communicate that to him, so I just ended up ghosting him after a nice date. So, oh, he probably thinks I was just there for the food. I hate these eyebrows. Holy Sh. I tried Tinder for a bit, but I was banned. So yeah, I kind of like making a video like this where I do less scripting and I just kind of talk about whatever. That's why I like "Get Ready With Me" is like, chit-chat. "Get Ready With Me" is my favorite one to watch. For those types of videos, it's Raw Beauty Christy. Raw Beauty Christy. I'm such a huge fangirl of yours. Never change. Always stay the same because that's natural to us human beings who aren't ever-evolving. Okay. Oh, also, I assumed into my eye. I remembered my last video, which if you watched it, you can watch it here if you want to. I dyed my hair blue and it's back to blonde and it's been barely a week. I just get really bored really quickly. And maybe those types of colors are good for me in that sense, you know, I can just like throw it on and then, you know, change it soon after. And I mean, I was just washing my hair after that. I haven't bleached it or anything. It has like a bit of like a warm tint though, cuz I did like an orange corrective thing. Oh yeah. Oh, I forgot about my eyelash curler. It's not even in my armpit anymore. It was in my labia. Cool. Anyway, this mascara is the High Impact Mascara by Clinique. And I'm gonna take some highlighter. This is the Your Skin Nude Air Luminizer in 02 Halo Gold. Okay. And I never really go too crazy with highlighter anymore. Like I just kind of dab.

I'm going to New York next week on Monday. Oh, for three whole weeks. I'm so excited. I've been going a lot like in the past year or so. Like I've been there maybe every other month. It's crazy. Actually thinking of moving there cuz I've just been there so much. But yeah, I just go there for a couple of weeks at a time, through studio, everyday, write music with some amazing people. And y'all, so when I go to New York, it's actually like so surprising to me every time how many people I know. Not many, but like several people recognize me there, you know, and they've seen my videos. And it's just so weird. Like I just make these videos. I mean, I haven't made many videos in the past times, but I just make videos and put them out there and I know that people see them. But when I meet people in person who see them, it's like, yeah. So usually when I go on a date, I just do a lip liner and I don't put any like other stuff on top of it because of possible makeup outage. But today I'm going to do a gloss. And this is my favorite gloss, the Buxom Gloss in the shade Brandy. Ah, cute. And I'm gonna finish it off with some spray. This is the Linda Hallberg Glömmis. It's not really like a setting spray, but it makes your skin super glowy. So I'm gonna be using that. Mmm, yes. Do you see that? Oh my god, Linda Hallberg, my sister, you have done it. That is straight up glass skin. Wow. All right, so. Oh, she's cute. Holy. Am I really gonna start doing this every video? I wanna myself. I already do that. Well, guys and girls and possible gender non-conforming people, the time is here and I think I'm finally ready for my date. That was good. I can go to sleep.