Transcription
I was a dedicated pagan, living the pagan lifestyle, drinking and smoking and shooting and and running and gunning. I was living in unit 3, A-wing, cell 25. It's December 20th, 2021. I just felt weird. I felt odd. Uh, I can't really describe the feeling, and I dropped dead. And I was dead for 20 minutes.
I was in a valley, and I still perceived myself to be in this body. There were no trees, there was nothing green. There were no cars, roads, signs. There were no buildings, no sidewalks. And it was just like desert and small rock. And off in the distance, there was a man, and I didn't want to look at him because I just felt shame. And then next thing I know, it was like darkness, and it was just like, and that's when it started, and it was horrible.
Hello, my name is Kenneth McDonald, and, um, this is my testimony. I was raised in Reno, Nevada, and I was raised by a single mother who practiced Egyptian witchcraft and still does to this day. Um, I had a hard life as a youngster, and I ended up running away when I was younger, at about round 15 or so, and got into drugs and stealing and doing all the wrong things. And eventually, I did too many wrong things and, uh, caught a case in Reno, Nevada, for attempted murder and robbery, and I was sentenced to 70 years in the Nevada prison system in 1996. I was 18 years old.
And so, upon entering the prison system, I got right into gang life, and I got right into pagan life. And, um, because all I ever really knew was a pagan upbringing, and it wasn't so much that my mother forced it upon me, but it was always, always prevalent. There were always books around the house on spellwork and and magics and this and that. So obviously, man, there was a curiosity already implanted in my mind. When I got into prison, so, so it was natural that I started looking at the pagan religious religious services, uh, because of my upbringing, and as well as that's where all my friends were. And I got into gang life because that's where my friends were too. So within 5 years, I learned a lot of paganism, and I actually started, uh, leading the services for the pagans, as well as climbing the ladder up in in gang life. Uh, within 10 years, I was teaching, and I was teaching the inmates who would come in, and I would teach them Wicca, I would teach them Druidry. Um, I was writing a lot of the ceremonies and performing a lot of ceremonies, and I was the high priest. And when I wasn't doing the pagan thing or the religious thing for the pagans, I was deeply involved in gang life. And then 15 years went by, and then about 20 years went by, and I just kept climbing the ladder of both the pagan life and the gang life. And I was a hater. I was a hater. I was very anti-Christian. I had a few Christian friends, but we did not talk about the Lord. And when they would tell me, "Well, man dog, you know, man, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, you know, I'm free, man. I, the Lord freed me." And and I could not see or understand what they were saying. I'd be like, "You're a fool. You're a fool, homie. You're in prison with me. If you think you're free, man, you need to go get some meds or something." You know, I, I, I was a jerk, a very calloused person. And I was raised in prison. So eventually, you know, 20 years and or so went by, and in 2018, I just kept getting in so much trouble that they ended up sending me out of state, and they sent me to a private prison in Eloy, Arizona. And, uh, I ended up selling up with a man named James Matlean. Last name is M-A-T-L-E-A-N. And he's still in right now. He's got two lives without. So we settled up and became cellies, and we got along pretty good. And I did a couple years out there in the private prison system. Then they sent me to the federal prison system. And eventually, uh, in December of 2020, Nevada came and brought us all back. And it was the height of COVID, and, um, they took us to a prison in southern Nevada, right outside Las Vegas, Nevada, called High Desert State Prison. And that's where this really all kind of begins. And you have to remember, I never been to church. I never read the Bible. And I mean, man, I, I was a dedicated pagan. That is all tattooed. That's all the planets. That's the 12 astrological symbols. That's called Om. That's Irish writing. Each one is a letter and a tree and a symbol and a meaning. I mean, man, I was living the pagan lifestyle. And so when they brought us back, it was during COVID, December 2020, and everything was locked down. I mean, man, we could not even get out of the cell. We were lucky to get out once a week to take a shower. There was no yard. They were feeding us in the cell. There was no law library. There were no. We were lucky if they had let the porter to come out and clean. That we were on total lockdown because of COVID. Now, prison is a very nasty, disgusting place. And, um, when you, if you're an inmate, you move into a new cell, you go in and immediately you scrub it from the ceiling down. It, it's just a disgusting place. So you scrub that cell down. So, uh, we were scrubbing the cell down, and, and, you know, it'd been a minute, hour and a half, couple hours went by, and I, I was kind of tired. I was just sitting on the bed. And, uh, James was in front of me. So I was sitting on the bed, he was in front of me, and the door was behind him, and he was kind of angled like this. So there's a wall that comes out right here. The door is behind him, and the toilet and all that are over there, and the bed would be that way. And he was spinning up a clothesline because nobody sends their laundry to prison. In the prison laundry, it comes back brown, so everybody does their laundry in their cells. Um, so he was spinning up our clothes line. So the walls right here, the door's back here, and he's looking at it. And I was just sitting on the bed. We weren't talking or nothing. And then I seen something. I seen a man. I seen a man come right through the wall behind James. James is like this. The man was back here, and he just came right through. And he was about 8 in off the floor. And I ain't never said this about another man in my life. He was beautiful. He was beautiful. And I was like stuck. I was just, I was, I was, I guess in amazement, in shock, but it was peace. There was peace there. And he just came right through, and he was looking down at James, and he was writing. He didn't have no wings, he didn't have a halo, he didn't have none of this. He, he was a man. He was a man, but he had the most beautiful golden clothes on. And, and I mean, like, like they were golden light, like he shone. He just had this shown. I, I don't want to say shine because that, like you could look at him, but he glowed. It shone with golden light. His clothes were glowing like golden light. His skin glowed. He just glowed with golden light. And he had this, this board and a pen, and he was looking down at James. James is spinning the clothesline, and he's writing. And I, I guess about 30 to 45 seconds go by, and James is twisting, and I'm just watching this guy, and he's writing. Looks, looks at James, writes. And I don't say nothing. I didn't say a word. And, um, James looked at me and was like, "Homie, what are you looking at?" Cuz if you're looking over somebody's shoulder, that person's going to do what? That they're going to do what James did. "What are you looking at?" What? He's seen him too. He's seen him too. And, uh, he jumped over. He put his hands on his head and he jumped over towards me. So now he was looking back like this. So he's right here. I'm looking, and the man's just looking at us both now. And he's screaming, "No, no, no, please, no, no, no, please, no." I didn't say nothing. I was just, I was stuck. And the man looked at us both and just wrote some things down and went right back through the wall. And immediately, James was like, "What was that?" I said, "Don't say a word. Don't say a word, man. Don't say nothing, but don't forget what you just seen." I grabbed a piece of paper so he couldn't see what I was writing, and I wrote something down, and I folded the paper, and I said, "What did you see?" He said, "I seen a man in a yellow orange suit writing on a clipboard." I opened the paper up, and it said, "Man in golden suit writing on tablet." And he's like, "No, no, no, no, man. And what the..." Now, he was raised in a Christian family. I wasn't. So to me, I was just like, "Well, man, that, that's just a spirit or something." You know what I mean? It was still amazing. But he's like, you know, he's kind of torn because I'm slowly reeling him into pagan life, man. We, you know, we told our friends about it, and we tripped on it for a good few months, just like, man, what, what, you know, what I mean? Because the door never opened. The door was shut. To turn around and just see a person inside a room with you and never even hear the door, and you know that the door never opened, therefore the person just appeared, or they had to come through the wall like he did, would be more than what you could believe, I guess. But it happened, and it was amazing. It was amazing. He didn't talk to me. He didn't talk to us. He didn't, he didn't sign language. He didn't do none of that. He was just writing. So we tripped on it for a few months, and they ended up transferring us to a prison across the street called Southern Desert Correctional Center in Southern Nevada. Um, I was living in unit 3, A-wing, cell 25, and he was on the top rack. And now they, they, it's, and, and it's a year later to the day, to the hour. It's December 20th, 2021. So I mean, we're really not tripping on it too much anymore. We're just, you know, we're, I, I went back to doing what I was doing, man, living the pagan lifestyle, and, you know, um, living the gang lifestyle and drinking and smoking and shooting and and running and gunning and doing all the things that I wasn't supposed to be doing, for sure. Um, so we're in 3A25, he's on the top rack, I'm on the bottom rack, and it's half tier now. Now they've opened half tier because of COVID, so they're kind of slowly just letting us have some tier time and all that. And it's December 20th, I'd say about around 1:30 in the afternoon or so, and I just felt odd. I felt really, I just felt weird. I felt odd. Uh, I can't really describe the feeling. So I got up, I got my cup, I went over to the sink, filled it up, sat there, took a drink of water, went over, sat back down on my bed, and I dropped dead. And I was dead for 20 minutes.
Um, I guess I don't know how long it was until James looked down over the bed and seen that I was dead, and then he jumped down. And his parents are actually in the medical field, so he knew CPR. Praise God. So he jumped down and started CPR. And from what he tells me, he gave me CPR for about seven, eight minutes before they finally. And he was giving me CPR, and in between CPR, he'd get up and kick the door and yell, "Man down." So around after 7, 8 minutes, they finally get the door open. The gang investigator comes in, a big guy named Ruiz, and he starts going to town on me with CPR. Well, he presses so hard it breaks my sternum. And he tells me this, uh, uh, when I got back to the yard, he says, "Man, your, your chest went flat and your stomach got big. We, we thought we killed you. We jumped off you, and your, your chest just pumped right back up." Like, what? Then the nurses came in, all that, and they got me on the crash cart and got me on the ambulance. The ambulance people, they started going, doing their thing, and I woke up in the hospital. And there were two guards at the foot of my bed. One of them said, "Do you, man, what's up, man? Do you, do you know what's going on?" I was like, "Man, my chest hurts." They're like, "I bet we broke it." They said, "We just dragged you out of the unit off the yard dead." The whole yard seen it. Everybody, man, you know, uh, and let me tell you something, a men's prison is a full-blown gossip center. Everybody is, I mean, man, listen, uh, uh, there are no secrets. So he's like, "Man, you know, everybody seen what happened, man. We dragged you out of the unit dead, uh, uh, and dragged you off the yard. Everybody watched." And I was like, "Man, I, I, I could feel tears just welling up, starting to come down." And, and the other guard was like, "Man, did you see something over there?" And I just said, "Man, it's all bad. It's all bad." And so now I'm going to tell you what I told them, and this is what I seen on the other side when I was dead for them 20 minutes. So the first thing that I seen is I was like in a valley. I was in a valley, and I still perceived myself to be in this body. There were no trees, there was nothing green. There were no cars, roads, signs. There were no buildings, no sidewalks, nothing man-made was there. And it was just like desert and small rock. It was like, like a wasteland. And off in the distance, there was a man. And it wasn't the same man that came through the wall. It was a man, and he didn't wave at me, he didn't yell, he didn't talk, he didn't say nothing to me. He was off in the distance, but he was staring at me. And I mean, he was staring at me the same way. And, and, and, and I say this because I think everybody can relate with this. He was staring at me just like your dad used to stare at you when you did something wrong. That look. And, and, and, and I didn't want to look at him because I just felt shame. I was like, I just felt shame. And I really wasn't understanding why I was feeling the shame at the time. I was just, I felt bad. I felt shame. I felt embarrassed. I, I, I was, man. And he just kept staring at me. I used to wear glasses. I used to be nearsighted. So as I kept looking over at him, and then like looking around, I could see myself in his body. And I'm kind of looking around. I still see him, but I'm really not trying to look at him. Next thing I know, I think my glasses were dirty because I could see like this light gray smoke fog coming up. And I thought my glasses were dirty. So I looked over them. I tried to look underneath them, and it was still there. So now I realize, okay, it's not my glasses. Um, and I looked down, and that fog, that dark gray smoke was coming off of me. It was coming off my chest, and it was be, it was like more and more and more and more. And then next thing I know, it was like darkness, and it was just like, and that's when it started, and it was horrible. It was so horrible. It was just darkness, and you can't feel nothing because there's nothing to grab on to, nothing. It's pure darkness. Yet at the same time, I relived every horrible, bad, evil, wicked, nasty thing that I ever did to another person. And I had about 25 years in prison at the time, and I've done some evil things to people. I hurt people bad. And I relived all those things that I did to them people, but through their eyes. I relived how I made them feel. I relived what they went through because of my actions. And there ain't nothing in this world that will ever compare to the torment of living through that. I've been, I've been beat down, I've been stabbed, I've been ran over, and man, I, I, man, I've been tore up. And that is nothing in comparison to the torments of living through the pain that we cause others. Physically, as well as with our mouth, because my mouth burned. My mouth burned so bad. And you have to remember, I never read the Bible. I never been to church. I did not hang out with Christians. I was a hater. I was anti-Christian. I used to talk bad to Christians. I used to talk bad about Christianity. I used to talk bad about Christ, man. I, I ran my mouth. And my mouth burned just like in Luke 16. I promise. And, and, and when you read Luke 16, the rich man and Lazarus, all you really see is that, is that the rich man yells over at Father Abraham, he says, "Man, send, send old boy over, man, so he can dip his water and put it on my tongue. Send Lazarus with just a drop of water." I promise, man, it was like lightning right in between my teeth instead of a tongue. I had a cold. But they never tell you why your mouth burns. It never says why the rich man's mouth burns. And I'm going to tell you why my mouth burns so, so bad, because I had to retell every lie, half-truth, wicked, evil, put down, every hurtful thing that ever came out of my mouth. I've said it again, and it was horrible. I never knew that my words had caused so much pain. And I tried not to. I tried, I tried to keep my mouth shut so bad, because every time I would open my mouth, it was like oxygen to a fire. It just got hotter. But you're forced to resay it. You're forced to say every, every little lie. There are no white lies. And, and sometimes we, we do lie in life. We lie in life because we don't want to hurt somebody's feelings. And, and it's, I, I, man, it was every single lie I ever told. And what's even worse is a half-truth. And I was a liar. I was a straight-up liar. I would tell half lies. I would tell lies. I would spin truths. And I would insult people. Every insult I said, every time I put somebody down, I said it again. And while I said it again, and experienced the the burning of my mouth, I relived the pain that my insults, that my lies, that my half-truths caused that person. And I, I just, I never knew that I'd caused so much pain. I, I never knew that I had done so much damage. I, I never knew. And so I promise, that is that in Luke 16. It's so true. Jesus didn't just come here to tell us a bunch of stories. Every one of the parables he tells is, is the truth. He's telling us what to expect on the other side, or he's trying to put it in a way that we can understand what will be waiting for us on the other side. It was horrible. It was horrible. There ain't nothing on this planet that will ever compare to the torment that awaits a non-believer in judgment. And it seemed like it went on forever. It seemed like it wouldn't stop. It just kept going and going. Yet you can't see anything else but your own torments that you caused the other people while you relive the torment that you caused them and experience that pain that you caused them in darkness without a lie. And, and, and I did some bad things. I shot somebody five times. That's why they sent me to prison. And I went through every bit of that pain. And I just didn't experience the pain that I had caused him, but the pain that I caused their families. You will relive all the pain that you caused that person, their loved ones. You experience it all. The pain that you caused your own family. And it doesn't stop because I was like, man, just, I would think to myself, man, just kill me. Just, I want to be done with this, man. I, man, I'm cool on this. And, you know, death ain't coming. So you don't think that anymore. You don't think about dying anymore because you know that it's not going to come. So now you're forced basically just to, uh, uh, observe, concentrate, and, and relive your own pain that you brought yourself off in life. All the pain, all the suffering that you brought here will be brought upon you there. And I cried. I cried, man. I could have, I could have filled a swimming pool up 10 times over with all my tears. I cried so much. I didn't know that I'd brought so much pain. I, I didn't, I just didn't know. I, man, I just went through all that pain and torment. And, and there was a question asked. There was a question asked of me in the middle of my torment and my pain. There was a question, and it said, "Do you want to live or die?" And we have to stop. You have to understand, I had a 70-year sentence, and I never programmed, I never did anything to better my situation. I never did anything that would allow me to be released from prison. I'll just say that. So I didn't think that I would, I thought that I would die in prison. And when the question was posed, "Do you want to live or die?" I said, "I want to live." Because I would rather spend the rest of my days in a foul, nasty cell in a men's prison where life sucks, prison sucks. I would rather spend the rest of my days there than go through one more split second of the torment of judgment. And, um, all of a sudden, and I was just crying and crying and crying. And then all of a sudden, it was like the fog, this smoke that was coming off of me, it turned down just the smallest bit, just the smallest of bits, it turned down. And for the first time in my life, I knew what it was like to be grateful. I never knew what it was like to be grateful. I never knew gratitude until that very moment when it just turned down a touch. And my tears of pain, my, my tears of sorrow became tears of gratitude. I was so grateful that it just turned down a touch. And, uh, and it slowly but surely, it just became less and less and less. And I cried even harder and harder and harder. I was so grateful. My face was just soggy with tears. I cried so much. And eventually, it turned down, and I was back in that valley. I was back in that valley, and that man was still standing there, still staring at me. And, and it was like he knew everything that I'd ever done, like everything that I ever done was on full display for him. Um, and, and so there, man, there's, I want to say it's Abraham, you know what I mean? Like, because the whole thing, everything I went through, I, is, is exactly as described in the rich man and Lazarus. And it's just, it's amazing to me. It's so amazing. And my face was so wet, and I was just so grateful. And, and there, and, and in that valley, there's no, you can't hear anything. It's just silence. It's silence. And then next thing you know, I was somewhere else. And they say the twinkling of an eye. And I promise, I promise, I promise, and I've said this in in other places too, and I'm going to try and explain to you how fast the twinkling of an eye is. Think of traveling from here to Mars at the speed of light, okay? You're at Mars in a few hours, give or take, right? That's the fastest thing we know of. It's pretty fast. Now, I want you to think of Saturn. See, you're already there. When I told you to think of Saturn, as soon as I said Saturn, you, the image was in your mind. And that's how fast I was in another place. When they say the twinkling of an eye, it is the speed of thought. I promise. And I was in another place. And it's beautiful. It's beautiful. I could still feel the tears on my face. I could still feel the, the, the feeling of wetness, but yet there were no tears. But the feeling of the wetness was still there. And when it says, "I'll dry your tears," I promise that's true, brothers and sisters. And it was beautiful. I never knew that such beauty could ever exist. I never knew that such beauty was even possible. And I was raised in prison. I ain't never begged for nothing in my life. And immediately, there was so much love washing down on me. Immediately, I, I immediately I fell to my knees. And right before I fell on my knees, there was, and I don't know if they're angels, spirits, beings, what, man, I, you know, I want to say that there are spirits because they look just like me, but there was two here, and there was three here. And I fell right to my knees. I turned up, and I tried to beg to stay. And when I opened my mouth to beg to stay, there was no words that came out. It was like melody came out. And as I'm looking up, and I'm, I'm, I'm begging to stay, and I'm, I'm trying to speak the words, but the words aren't coming out. It's like melody coming out. The being that's right there looks down at me. It's almost like as if he were to say, "That's how I felt when I got here too." He had perfect love, peace, and joy on his face. And then he just went back to looking forward. And everybody was looking forward. And I got up, and I started looking forward. And instantly, without a doubt, man, you know there is a Lord and a Savior, and you know there is a Father, and his glory is washing down upon you. And it's amazing. It's amazing in every way. It's so beautiful. And I remember I was looking around, and, and I was, I was looking at myself. And man, brothers and sisters, I promise you, there are no races in heaven. There's no blacks, no whites, Hispanics, Asians, or nothing. Listen, nope. We look like amber light. Yes, you have a body, but it was like, like, like amber light, like it glowed. It makes me think like here on earth, man, the whole, uh, uh, race identity subject is of the flesh. When we think of what where we're from, and all that's the flesh. It doesn't exist in heaven. And I could hear this music. I could hear this melody being played. And for all the music lovers out there, check this out. Every rhythm figure is better than the last, and you'll never hear the same one twice. And it's beautiful. It's almost like chimes on a synthesizer, and it's beautiful. And if you just stop, you can hear it. It never ends. And, and at the same time, you're looking forward, and it's just God's glory washing down on you. And it's light everywhere. And I remember I was like, man, there's so much light. I looked up, and this is amazing to me. The sky, the sky was the same color as the man's clothes that came through the wall a year earlier. It's golden light. There's no sun. There's, but there's light everywhere. But there's no sun. There's no moon. There's nothing like that. But yet, it doesn't hurt your eyes. You can look right at it. It's everywhere. It's you. It's us. It's amazing. And it's so beautiful. And the, it, all your old memories of this world, all your memories of your pains and your hurts, you'll never think about those again. You'll never think about, you know, uh, uh, the guy that stole your mail, the, the person that cut you off in traffic, you won't think about the person that cheated on you. You will never think about the hurts that you went through in life. And at the same time, you'll never remember the hurts that you caused others in life. You'll never have those memories of the pain that you caused and the pain that you received. Those will be washed away, and you'll, you'll never have those memories. You'll never have the, the memories of pain, of hurt. You, you won't, you just, those will be washed away. I promise. You'll never think about, for instance, you say, "Well, man, what about my great-great-grandmama that used to go to church with me?" And, and you think to yourself, "Will I see her in heaven? Will I see my grandfather in heaven? Will I see my loved ones in heaven? They had Jesus. We went to church. Will I see them in heaven?" I promise you'll never have that thought ever again. You will never have the thought of of wondering if you're going to see your loved ones in heaven if they had Christ, because that's to worry. This goes right back into the teachings of Jesus of why are you worrying? Do not worry. He said this because that's where he came from. Worry does not exist in heaven. When we worry, it locks us into living in the flesh. You will never worry about people that did you bad. You'll never worry about the people you did bad. You'll never worry about your loved ones because you will know without a doubt that they are in perfect love, peace, and joy, just like you are. And if you want to see them, you can, but you're too busy. It's like you're too busy basking in the glory of God. I promise. I didn't see some dude chilling in a chair with a long white beard. I didn't see none of that. But you know instantly that that is God. All my questions were answered. All the times that I used to try and argue with Christians and, and say, "Oh, the book's full of it's hypocrisy and this and..." Nope, nope, nope. I never even thought to ask a question when I got there. I had no questions. I never even thought to say, "Well, what about this or why'd you do that or..." No, everything was answered in the most beautiful and perfect way, and you won't even think about it anymore. And it was like the Lord gave, just like in Ezekiel, I promise, he gave me a new heart and a new spirit. And I just stood there soaking all this in. I remember I tried to feel my teeth, and it was like there was nothing hard. There's nothing hard. This world, the flesh, this world is of the material, and heaven is light. Heaven is light. The spirit is of light. It is of, if you could think of like energy, if I could take, uh, the, the, the light out of a light bulb and hold it right here, it would just be like fuzzy energy. That's what it's like in heaven. But yes, everything is defined, but it's beautiful in every way. Um, you, man, it, you'll never think about saying, "Oh, I, you know, I told them Baptists they were wrong, or, or I, I said I told you guys I were right." You, you won't think of any of the arguments that you had about Christ or Christianity. You're not going to think about any of that. There will be no "Aha, told you I was right" because pride and ego do not exist in heaven. There is no pride. There is no ego that exists in heaven. So you will never ever get to just sit there and say, "Told you so." Not gonna happen. That's not gonna happen. See, because you think that you'll be satisfied by saying, "I told you so." But you won't. You, you cannot find satisfaction in the ego or in the pride. You cannot find satisfaction in the flesh. It's better than that. It's God's glory, and it's on tap. You'll never get bored in heaven. You'll never think, "I did that yesterday." You know what I mean? "I want to do that." It's, it's, it's endless. It's endless beauty. It's amazing in every way. So as I'm taking this in, and, and I'm just, and, and it's almost like I'm, I'm being downloaded. I've got a new heart, new spirit. And, and, and I never knew that such love, peace, and joy could exist. I never knew that there was a type of love that was just pouring down upon me. I didn't even, I didn't think it was possible. And I thought I was so spiritual. I thought that I was so spiritual, and I was the farthest thing away from it. And I spent my life dedicated to a pagan lie. I read, I read so many books, it was ridiculous, and it was all a lie. All the, all the things in the, those pagan books that say this is what to expect when you get there, was not there waiting for me. Yet everything in the Bible, everything described in the Bible, is what I went through, what I seen. And I mean, I was a pagan. I was living it, and I was living a lie. So as I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm there in heaven, praise God. And it's like I'm being downloaded with this information. And, you know, so many times in the Bible, we read about the heart, the heart, the heart. It's all about the heart. And this is what was downloaded. This was what, what was put into my heart when I was there. There's a reason why it's all about the heart. When you are born, when we are born here, we are born with a clean heart, with a heart of glass. You can see right through it. It's pristine, and it's clean in every way. And yet, when we sin, and what is sin? Sin is, sin is nothing more than to hurt each other. When we think about sin here, we think about God restricting us. That's how a lot of people look at sin. But we can't look at it like that. We have to look at sin as nothing more than us hurting ourselves and hurting each other. So now you have this crystal clean heart. Now I want you to think of like an ink pad that, that say you do your fingerprints on, like in jail. When you sin, it's like putting your thumb on an ink pad and smudging that crystal clean piece of glass heart. You stain your heart with sin. And actually, Jeremiah, I want to say it's 17, says it real clear that we write our sins upon our heart with an iron pen that has the tip of a diamond. We, we scar our sins upon our heart. And I want to say it's just like that. We stain our, our hearts with sin. And so yes, a transgression of one law is a transgression of all law. But what you have to understand is that there is a certain weight and a certain depth of color to each sin. And remember, this world is a shadow world of the spirit world. So what we see here is a, is a shadow of the spirit world. So I want you to think about the, uh, uh, table of elements, um, the, the, uh, all the atoms and different metals and the copper and this and that. Each one has a certain weight to it, right? So each sin has a certain weight to it and a certain color. Cursing is light as a feather and translucent, yet murder is dark as night. D is as, is black as space and the weight of the world. So when you do these sins and you place them upon your heart, you stain your heart with these sins. If you cuss, yeah, you might not see that sin. It might be translucent and light as a feather. Or if you commit murder, man, you can't see through it. It's solid black and the weight of the world upon your heart. Well, when we continue to sin, what do we do? We continue to pile these sins upon our hearts. And next thing you know, our heart emanates light. Our heart emanates light. Your, your heart is a beacon of light, like a lighthouse, like a candle. Think of, and Jesus said it best. Think of your heart like a candle, and sin is a basket. Who puts a basket over a candle? Right? Why would you do that? But we do it. We're sick with it. So when you continue to block this light out, put these sins upon your heart, you give yourself a heavy heart. The weight of those sins have given you a heavy heart. The color of those sins have blocked out the light, have now hardened your heart. This is why it's so important, brothers and sisters, for us to confess our sins. Love will cover a multitude of sins. Amen. I promise it will. And, and so it's so important. And you don't need to go see some pastor and, and spend 20 minutes. No, as soon as you sin, stop. Just stop and repent. Turn from it. And man, just. And all you got to do is say, "Man, Father God, my bad. My bad, man. I didn't mean to cuss. My bad, man. I didn't mean to." You know what I mean? "I didn't mean to tell that little lie like that. I was just trying to make him feel better or whatever. I shouldn't have did that." Confess it. Get it up off of you. But we don't do that. We literally have spiritual heart disease because we pack this sin upon our hearts. So now we have to understand, well, there's another part that's very, very important that the heart deals with. So if your heart and sin kind of go together, what, what, what is the result? Right? So now I want you to kind of remember what I'm talking about with the heart, but we're going to step away from that a little bit because what I'm about to tell you next is directly related to with the heart. So now we know that God the Father most high, who sits up in heaven, is pouring blessings down upon us day and night. Why? Because he's eternal. They'll never stop. The blessings are showering down upon you right now. They will never stop. And we know that because God is a spirit, therefore the blessings are spiritual in nature. So God, who is a spirit, is pouring the blessings of this down upon us, which are spiritual in nature. So now the question becomes, how do you capture those blessings? Do you, do you go out and get a cup and, and run outside and, and try to, you know, let me capture the blessings of God? Uh, uh, do you, do you fill them up in your swimming pool? What do you, what do you do? How do we capture the blessings of God? No, we, we, we can't use anything of this world because they're spiritual in nature. That cup is of the flesh. It's of the material. Well, brothers and sisters, what you have to understand is the very thing that you are made out of, that God made you out of, which was him, your spirit, is the vessel, the proper vessel in which to receive the blessings of God. See, because your spirit is eternal, why? Because it was made from God, who is eternal. So therefore, your spirit, which is eternal, is the proper vessel in which to receive the blessings of God. Why? Because it can never be all the way filled up. It's eternal, so it can capture all the blessings of God. Nothing is wasted. It's perfect in every way. He is perfect in every way. So now we have to go to the heart. When we sin, when we commit the pains and the hurts and the sorrows, uh, in life here, and put the sins upon our heart, it has a direct effect upon our spirit. It puts our spirit to sleep. When you sin and you place that sin upon your heart, you are slowly putting your spirit into a coma. And if your spirit is asleep, then you are awake in the flesh, and you are not receiving the blessings of God. And a, and a classic way to think about this, because we've all been through this, and I tell pe, I tell a lot of people this, is to think about when you were a child. We all rode the bus to school. We all rode the bus to school, and we all missed the bus. We all missed the bus. Each and every one of us has had to walk to school. Why did you miss the bus? The very reason why you missed the bus is because you slept in. See, that's the same thing as your spirit. Because you are asleep in the spirit, you're not receiving the blessings of God. Because you were asleep as a child, you missed the school bus, which was the blessing, so that you didn't have to walk 10 miles to school. And when you had to walk 10 miles to school, you got chased by dogs, you tripped over the sidewalk, you had to walk through the rain, you had to fight bullies, who, who knows? It was the stumbling blocks of life. When we live, walk, and talk in the flesh, we trip over the stumbling blocks of life. When we are asleep in the spirit. But when we are attentive and awake in the spirit by keeping a clean heart, we receive the blessings of God. This is, and brothers and sisters, I cannot, I just can't tell you enough how important it is for us to keep our hearts clean. And it's told throughout the Bible. The Lord tells us this, "Blessed are the pure in heart." So to keep a clean heart is to keep an awake spirit. So it's like all of this is being downloaded to me, and, and, and it's just, it's like, it's like it's just being downloaded on my heart, on my new heart. I, and, and a new spirit. And, and everything was beautiful. And then I woke up. Then I woke up, and I was in a hospital in Las Vegas. And that's when I seen the two guards. And I was like, "Ah, my chest hurts." The next day, maybe, uh, the next day, day after, something like that. Uh, there were no windows or clocks, so I couldn't tell how long I was there, but I'm going to say it was probably a day, day and a half, something like that. The doctors and nurses came in, and they're like, "Okay, what's going on?" I said, "Man, what are you talking about, man? What, what do you mean, what's going on?" You know, I'm thinking to myself, like, you're the doctor. And they said, "We've got your talk screen right here. There is nothing in your talk screen here to kill you. There's some things in there, we can tell you've been partying, but the levels of what you got in there, there's nothing in there to kill you. And, and first and foremost, you're not brain dead. Why, you shouldn't even be talking right now. You shouldn't even be talking to us. What's going on?" And listen, if you were dead for over 20 minutes, we got all your testing right here. I said, "Man, I don't know. I, I don't know." And you know why? While they're telling me this, all I can really think about is what I seen over there. Like, like it's like I'm, I'm, I'm kind of like almost reliving it all. I'm thinking about everything I seen, and I'm just like, I'm not understanding, cuz they're like, "Man, you just been dead 20 minutes." And I'm like, "Well, man, wait a minute." Because there's a major part of me that's like, I know that there's God, and I know that there's Jesus, and yet I spent my whole life denying it. And to know that I read all them books, and nothing that I read, nothing that I put my faith in, was waiting for me on the other side, was like, it was like swallowing a dry brick. And I thought to myself, man, I, I almost wasted my whole life believing a lie. And so the doctor said, "Listen, that, that, that we, we, there's nothing wrong with you, so you're going back to prison after three days." And the guy, the cops couldn't even believe it. The g, the gang investigator Ruiz, who was giving me CPR that broke my sternum, he came to the hospital. He said, "I, I, I heard that you were coming back. I had to come see it with my own eyes. I've seen three dead people in prison, and I promise I would have bet everything I had in life that you were the fourth one, man. I broke your chest. We jumped off you, and it came right back up." And I, I really didn't even have any words. Like I was just like, man, you know, I didn't even know what to.
Say and so I got back to prison and immediately I started telling all my friends what I seen on the other side. And what's wild is right when I got back, I must have shook 300, 400 hands. Every race, every color, every man, you, you name it. And what's wild is 99% of them were Christians. And I shook their hand and they said, "Man, I prayed for you. I prayed for you. I prayed for you. I prayed for you." I mean, it was amazing.
And you know, another dry brick that I swallowed is I only probably shook six hands of my friends that were pagans that said they prayed for me. All them people that were pagans that said, "Man, I love you, brother. Oh man, homie, I got you. What's up, dog?" No, it was Christians and some, and a lot of strangers at that, and said, "Man, we were praying for you." Praise God.
Um, and so, you know, when I got back to prison, I tried to get back to my old life because it's all I'd ever known. I tried to get back to running and gunning and shooting dope and smoking and drinking and chasing porn, sitting at the poker table. I mean, you name it, I went back to the pagan land. And it didn't feel like nothing to me. It felt like a piece of dirt. It had no spiritual uh substance to at all to me. It, I felt nothing there. It was emptiness. And I never went back. Never did another ceremony. And I was the groundskeeper. I actually worked. That was my job, taking care of the pagan lands. Uh, my, the chaplain was my boss. And I just quit going to work, quit signing for my days, just like, man, who cares?
And yet, I'm trying to do the things that I used to do. I'm trying to, man, but every time I'm doing them, and it wasn't like an overnight change. It was like, man, I would do the things that I used to do, but they didn't bring me any type of gratification. They didn't bring me any type of uh, of joy, for sure. It was different. I would sit at the poker table and gamble, but it, there was no euphoria to it anymore. And slowly but surely, I quit doing the things that I was doing. Within four months, I quit cussing because every time I would cuss, it would remind me of that valley. It would remind me of my mouth burning. I didn't like the way that it made me feel.
And yet at the same time, I must have cried for six months. I must have cried for six months, man. Four days a week, easy. I would go into my cell and shut the door. Sometimes it was for five minutes, and sometimes it was for 20 minutes, and I would just sob. I would cry. I would cry so much. And I would cry over the things that I was seeing on the news and in prison of how we treat each other. I would see somebody getting treated bad, and yeah, I felt bad for the victim, but I cried. I would cry for the person doing the action of treating the other person bad because I would think to myself, "Don't you know where you're going? Don't you know where you're going? Don't you know that you're going to have to relive that pain and torment that you're bringing upon another?" And I would shut my door. And and it's not something you want to be doing in a men's prison, believe me. And I'd shut my door and just sob and cry.
My friends knew it and they tried to help me out, man. But after a few months, they're like, "Man, we don't know what to do with you, man. We don't know what to do with you. All you do is think about what you've seen on the other side and you want to tell everybody about it." And what's wild is I had inmates knocking on my door all day long. I had cops, case workers, the the warden called me to his office and was like, "Man, what's up? The whole yard's talking about about about what, what, what? Man, tell me what's up." And I would, I said, "You want to know? You want to know what I seen?" He's like, "Absolutely." Every day somebody would come and ask me, and I'd tell them just like I'm telling you.
I would say within four or five months, the chaplain, uh, God bless that man, his name is Everage, I believe. Uh, he called me to the chapel and we go into his office. He's like, "Man, how you doing? How come you haven't come to sign in for your days? You ain't been going to land, you ain't been doing none of that, like no ceremonies or nothing. What's going on?" And I'm like, "Man, you know, I just, I'm cool." And he's like, "Man, you went to the hospital." And I'm looking at him, and I can tell. I can see it, man. I'm like, "Man, you want to know what, what I seen?" He's like, "I'm all ears."
And so I started telling him and, um, he stopped me about halfway through. He was like, "Man, just stop." I'm like, he's like, "Look what you're doing. This is scripture." I'm like, "I'm not hearing that. That was my flesh because I lived my whole life." But yet in my spirit, I knew it to be true. But yet, man, my flesh barked up. I'd be like, "Man, I'm not hearing that, man. No, no, no, no." It's so true in the scripture when it says that the flesh and the spirit, they war against each other. Your flesh will pipe up and say some silly stuff in order to to try and deny the spirit.
And so he was like, "Look what you're doing." I'm like, "Oh no." He's like, "Why, man? What do you mean?" Yet I knew he was right. He said, "Man, what, what, what's going on, man? Man, are you listening to the same music?" And I'm thinking to myself, "Whoa, wait a minute." He said, "Are you reading the same books? You sitting at the poker table all day? Are you still doing the things that you used to do?" And I'm like, "Man, why would this dude ask me this, man?" I'm thinking, "Why, man, does this dude got an informant following me around or something?" You know what I mean? That happens in prison. So, is this dude got like a, a snitch like doing this? You know, I'm thinking, "Wow."
And I, I remember I was like, "Man, but it blew me away." He asked me those things, man. And I was like, "No." And that's when I just, I, I, I told him. I, I kind of let it out too. I said, "Man, not only am I not doing those things anymore, but man, I'm crying almost every day." And he just stopped and he looked at me. He said, "That's what I thought." Like, "Whoa, whoa." You know, that's right when he said that, it was almost like, uh, uh, you know, like going to the doctor and the doctor telling you he knows what's wrong with you. And you know, and and and praise God, there was nothing wrong with me. Um, and he's like, "Man, that's what I thought." And I was like, "Whoa, what do you mean?"
And he says, "Man, listen, you got the Holy Spirit." I said, "I'm not hearing that, man. I, I'm not hearing that because I'd spent my whole life talking bad. I spent my whole life in denial. I spent my whole life, man, spitting upon Christians, man. Spent my whole life teaching other people to hate Christians." And I said, "I'm not hearing that." He said, "Why do you say that?" And I said, "Man, because I can't ever see something so clean, so good, being in something like me." He said, "That's what I thought." And he held up the Bible. He said, "This whole book's full of people just like you." I didn't know. I never read the Bible. I didn't know. I thought the Bible was full, you know, just a full of a bunch of of of good, shoes, perfect people, never got in trouble, never hurt no one. I didn't know. I never read the book. I didn't know.
You know, man, I've been asked a lot of times and, and, and throughout being released from prison, I've been asked a lot. Uh, people ask me, "Do you ever regret, you know, what you did to get in prison or being in prison?" No. The only thing I regret is not coming to Christ sooner. But I understand that it took me going to prison and doing the things that I did, even though that they were horrible, those things were necessary. They were a necessary element of me coming to Christ. And so I praise God for them every day. I'm thankful for every single man, all the hardship, all of it, because man, thank God it led me to Christ. So anyways, he tells me, he's like, "Man, this is what's going on." And I'm like, "Man, Holy Spirit." And I, and I, I just kept thinking, "Spirit, spirit, spirit." That's all I kept thinking, man. Before we had this conversation, is I was thinking, "Man, the spirit, the spirit, the spirit." I mean, it would, it just was in my mind all the time. Spirit, spirit, spirit.
And so when he says Holy Spirit, I'm like, "There's nothing out there that you can go and read unless you go to a pastor that tells you what it's like to be hit with the Holy Spirit." And man, if you've been hit with the Holy Spirit, if the Holy Spirit's jumped in you, you're going to know it because your life as you know it's going to fall apart. Life as you know it is going to run right through your fingers because the life as you know it is the life in the flesh. And so all the things that you've always been doing, you've stayed doing your whole life, are just going to crumble and fall apart right through your fingers. And you're going to try, you're going to try your hardest to hold them, but just like water, it's going to seep right through your fingers. When you get hit with the Holy Spirit, I promise you're going to know it because life as you know it is going to fall through your fingers. But a new life, and I promise, life in the spirit begins when you wake up in the spirit. It is so beautiful.
And so my first six months of coming back from the hospital were in a sense horrible. Uh, life sucked. I, I, you know what I mean? And and it was only once I talked to the chaplain that that I was starting to get some type of understanding. And I was like, "Okay, so, you know what? I'm going to read the Bible." And I was just reading it a little bit, but it was, it was not hard by any means. It was like it was just like re, it was like a refresher course, man. I read it and it was so smooth, it was so easy, it made so much sense. It was beautiful in every way. It was beautiful because it's truth.
Now, during while all that's going on, you got to remember, I was involved in gang life. Yet I didn't want to do the things that I was doing anymore. And so, man, we would sit and have these little meetings or conversations about people who were screwing up. And I'd be like, "Man, just give them a pass, man. Just let it go, bro. You, we ain't got to do all that. You know, we, man, let's, let's not. We don't need to cause. Don't cause harm. Don't be harmful, man." And my friends were like, "What? No, no. We got to get that dude, homie. What happened to you?" Because I used to be the first to say, "Man, let's get that dude. Let's stab that dude. Let's beat that dude down. Let's smash that dude." And now it was the opposite. Now I was like, "Man, just give him a pass. You know, it's, it's cool. Don't, let's not worry about it."
And so slowly but surely, I was losing all my friends. Uh, and and and I, man, I want to say that half the people that I was telling what was going on were like, "Man, I believe you." And the other half were like, "Man, you done lost your mind, player. You need to go see the psych, bro. There's something wrong with you. You've done too much time. You just snapped. Uh, uh, it's a wrap." So I was slowly but surely just being pushed to the side by by by, you know, the whites because, you know, I'm white and that's who I was running with. And so, man, I was, I was kind of tripping with them and I was tripping with everybody. I was tripping with the blacks, with the Mexicans, because I didn't think like them anymore. I didn't want to gossip anymore. I didn't want to, uh, talk bad about people anymore. I didn't want to plot and scheme and scam on people anymore. I just thought, "Man, we can be civil and kind to each other. Why wouldn't we do this?" And man, and people were like, "What are you talking about?" I was losing any and all credibility that I had in the prison world. As I was losing all my credibility, and now people were just looking at me like I was nuts. Yet there's people knocking on my door every day wanting to know what's on the other side. Cops are knocking on the door every day and want to know what's on the other side. And the whole time I'm on the know, man, trying to figure out what's going on. I know that there's a God. I know that Jesus is real. I know there's a Holy Spirit, but I don't know what order. I don't know how they work. I don't, I just know that it's all real.
And so after about a year and a half or so, man, things kind of got bad for me. And, um, one morning, man, I was walking down the hallway and I got surrounded by 20 inmates. And the one in front of me just said, "Man, you crazy mfer, you ain't scared of all these cats here with these knives?" And I looked down and they had their knives out. And I said, "Check this out, man. Every day, man, you cats come knock on my door, want to know what's next. And after this, man, and I'm telling you, man, that there is something after this. And I promise, man, I have no fear." And they tried to kill me. They stabbed me all in my neck, all in my side, tried to cut the tendons out my knee, they broke my face all up. Had to go see a plastic surgeon. They tried to kill me.
And so when I got back from the hospital, man, they put me in the hole. And I tried to hate him. And I know hate. I know hate real well. I spent my whole life drinking hate down every day and spewing hate. I know hate inside and out. And I tried to hate them dudes. I was like, "Man, I'm going to get them fools. I'm going to get every single one of them fools." But as soon as I would try and build that hate, that get that furnace fired up inside me, it was like it was cast right back out. As soon as I would try to harness the hatred, the anger, and just be pissed and just get them dudes, it was cast right out. I could not hold on to any hatred.
And I would ask myself, like, "What's going on with me, man? I didn't want to harm anybody. I didn't want to fight. I didn't want to insult. I didn't want to lie. I didn't want to steal. I didn't want to cuss. I didn't want to do the things that are of this world." And I didn't really understand what was going on because I was of this world. I didn't know anything of the spirit. I was the furthest thing from it. And I just, I couldn't hold on to any hate for any of them guys. And in fact, I'm not mad at any of them. I'm not mad at any of them because I understand why they did it because I used to be them. I know exactly what they're thinking. I know exactly what they're going through because I used to do the same thing. I used to be the one saying, "Let's get that dude. Let's kill that dude. Let's stab that dude." Whatever it is, I used to be the one that was saying things like that, that was acting out like that, that was hurting others like that. And so I understand that that's not their spirit. We fail to realize while we're here on earth, your spirit will never know racism. Your spirit will never know, uh, foul language or or to hurt or pain, depression. Your spirit only knows love because it's made of love. All the things that suck in life are of the flesh. So I, I get it. I know exactly why they did what they did because they're living in the flesh. They're living in this world. They're living this world. And I'm not mad at them. I understand it because I used to do it.
So eventually, the warden was like, he came to see me in the hole. And he was like, "Check this out, man." Um, you can't, you, we can't put you on the yard. We're sending you to a different yard. I said, "All right, whatever." And I spin, man. I, I was able to get a lot of, uh, reading of the Bible in while I was in the hole. And, um, so they sent me to another prison. And, you know, at the time, I had like 28 years in, so I've met thousands of people. So when I got there, I knew people there. First thing I did, man, I started telling everybody what I seen on the other side. Half the people thought I was crazy, and the other half were like, "I believe you."
And what's even more wild is within three months or so, I found myself behind the pulpit preaching the gospel every Monday afternoon in non-denominational Christian services. And I couldn't stay, I couldn't stay behind the pulpit because it's, it's like it's right here. And man, I'm, I'm walking, man. This is what's up. You know? And and man, it, it's, it's beautiful. And I never thought that I would ever be, you know, preaching the gospel. And praise God that I am. Praise God that that man, the, I didn't find Jesus, he found me. I promise. And as soon as I, as soon as I said, "All right, Jesus, take the wheel. I, I'll quit trying to control everything. We'll just do things your way." Life's been amazing. I found myself preaching the gospel every Monday afternoon.
And so after about nine months or so, they allow, man, they took me to a parole board. And listen, I never did anything to better my time. I never took any programs. I never took any type of programming that would help my situation out in prison. And, um, I went to the parole board and they gave me a parole. And not only did they give me a parole, but they allowed me to parole out of state to a non-family member's house. It's unheard of. He has given me all the desires of my heart. Praise God. And this continues even to this day. The desire of my heart is to tell the world about what, what's up. Well, man, that, that, yes, there is a judgment. That there is a heaven. And there is a God. And he, his son Jesus died on the cross for our sins. I mean, man, you know, he has just blessed me so many ways. It's just beautiful in every way. And so I, I'm just so grateful to come on this platform and share the word.
People have asked me, you know, "Who do you think the man in the golden suit was?" You know, they, people ask, "Was it Jesus? Was it an angel?" And, um, there's one part in the Bible that that really just sticks out to me so much. And it's Ezekiel 9. And I'm just paraphrasing. Um, in Ezekiel 9, uh, God's tripping. They're at the temple. And God's tripping. He's pissed. And he calls forth six men with battle axes. And he calls forth the seventh man, just dressed in linen and clothes, regular clothes, a man. And this is what's so important. This is what's so amazing to me is that he calls forth this seventh man. And the man shows up with the writer's ink horn at his side. He's got a pen. And God tells him to go throughout the city and put his mark upon the foreheads of all the men, all the women that sigh and cry over the abominations that are being done to each other. So all the men and women who sigh and cry over seeing the pain being caused amongst each other, receive the mark of God.
And I promise, it's real. I must have cried for six months. I cried for six months. Half the time I can't even tell you why. And the other half was because we treat each other like like garbage. And we don't even realize that all we're doing is hardening our hearts, heaving our hearts. We're packing sins upon our heart by talking bad to each other, by stealing each other's stuff, by doing harm to each other. You're hurting yourselves. So when people ask me, "Who was the man in the golden clothes?" I truly think that it was the man with the acorn at his side in Ezekiel 9.
Um, I spent my whole life as a pagan. I spent my whole life as a pagan. Spent my whole life hating. And I thought I was spiritual. Thought I was so spiritual. And I was the farthest thing from it. And and what's wild is I used to put all my faith into charms and pendants and and and amulets, things that I could wear, metals and rings and stones and herbs and and and and all the things that I thought would protect me. And yet when I came to Christ, I realized that all the things that I was putting my faith in could be burned up, rusted up, washed away, blown away, uh, stolen. And and and I go to these other platforms, these other, uh, social media platforms, and I'll see pagans, you know, on their, um, trying to give their word or whatever. And they got these necklaces hanging. And and they're telling people, "Oh, this one protects me from this, and this one protects me from this." And I think to myself, "So what you're saying is without those, you are unprotected?" When you come to Christ, you don't need anything. You don't need a necklace. You don't need a ring. You don't need a hat. You don't need any shoes. You don't need anything because you've got, you've been washed by the blood of the lamb. You got Christ. And therefore, you are protected.
So the best thing that we can do right now, and I believe that we are a chosen generation. I promise. I believe that we are a chosen generation. And we will see the return of the Messiah. And so that's my testimony. And and brothers and sisters, I would just like to close with a prayer of all those who haven't come to Christ yet. See, when you were a little boy or a little girl, your your parents used to tell you that two apples plus two apples was four apples. But it wasn't until a teacher shown you and put the two together and showed you that it was actually four apples. You went from believing to knowing. So allow your believing in the Lord to be turned into knowing in the Lord. And cap it with certainty. If you don't know Christ, if you don't know Christ, if you don't know Jesus, if you don't know the Father, and brothers and sisters, you, you don't know the Holy Spirit. Listen, use this as an opportunity to say, "Man, Father, I repent. Jesus, please. I know that you have washed me clean. I know that you were put upon the cross, that you were buried, and you rose again after three days, that you came back to life. And I ask that you give me a new heart and a new spirit. Take this stony heart out of me and put a new fleshly heart in me. And fill me full of your spirit, Father. I want to be Christ-minded. I want to be walking, talking, and living in the spirit. I don't want to be in the old man doing things of my plan, but I want to be in the new man and I want to do your plan, Father."
Brothers and sisters, use this as an opportunity to come to Christ. I promise, he will give you freedom. He will give you light. And he will give you all the desires of your heart. Brothers and sisters, use this as an opportunity to get the new heart, the new spirit, because Jesus is real. And he is here to set you free. Please, please dedicate your lives to Christ. He's dedicated to you. I promise he's dedicated to you. I promise. I'm so grateful for this platform. I'm so grateful to come on here and have this opportunity to share my experience. I, I'm just so grateful. And and I promise, brothers and sisters, God is so good. God is good all the time. And all the time, God is good.
Abba Father, who art in heaven, thy kingdom come, thy will be done, and not ours, Father. I'm so grateful for this opportunity, Father. I'm just so grateful for your love, your peace, your joy. Thank you for your son who died on the cross for my sins. Thank you for the Holy Spirit. And thank you for the man that you sent down to come see me and allowed me to see him, Father. I'm so grateful for the new heart and the new spirit and your spirit that you filled me with, Father. I give you all the praise and all the glory, Father. I would just pray that you would continue to pour your spirit upon the planet, Father. Pour your spirit into every man, woman, and child on this planet, Father, because we are all brothers and sisters. Wake everybody up. Wake all our spirits up, Father. And let us no longer continue to live in the flesh, but to live in the spirit, Father. Let us bask in your glory, your love, your peace, your joy, Father. And let us continue to love each other the very same way you love us, because we know that that, that the way that you love us is eternally. It's in Jesus name I pray. Amen.