Transcription
This is a very, very good question to for us to think about how a borderline individual is created. I don't believe that a borderline individual is born. There is a genetic aspect to it. Sure, there's a vulnerability, but it's a process.
It's uh a combination of early childhood experiences, early interactions that are progressively colored by an individual's difficulty in learning from others about themselves. But as as a person develops a sense of themselves that's less dependent on others, sometimes they start creating an image of themselves that's kind of self-created that it becomes almost like a hyperactive creation. They they they run a muck in their own mind and do not check in with other people often enough uh to find themselves there in. That's kind of a a movement that happens across time. Um it's hard to arrest that uh at any one point.
Having seen a lot of families uh where one child but not another has developed borderline personality disorder, what I see is that the relationship with that person has over years shifted. So they get less out of the same interaction with their parents or or caregivers than a sibling uh might do. They profit less from it in terms of finding a more centered sense of themselves in the interaction.
Whose fault is that? It's certainly not simply their fault, but also it's not simply the parents' fault because an individual with borderline personality makes it very difficult for another individual to represent them uh as they normally might a person. They do more extreme things. They have more extreme experiences, which is why they become dependent on a few people with whom they can develop special relationships where they can experience themselves in a way uh that we all have access to and we all should have access to to feel uh more stable uh in a social world.