Transcription
Get out of the shadows. Go network more. It pays off if you do it right.
I tell people books and networking are the same. They're both magical hacks. They allow you to download the wisdom and experience from other geniuses that took them 10 years to figure it out so you don't have to go through their trial, error, and suffering. You just, you just download it.
The same with networking. You get out with people, you meet the right people, and all, all of a sudden you're downloading their wisdom and experience. You're saving yourself a decade. You can do this thing the easy way, or you can do it the hard way. If people want to make money, you can make money the easy way, or you can make money the hard way. Up to you. A lot of people choose the hard way.
I tell people, you could be right, or you can be rich. A lot of people would rather be right than rich. Like, no, I, I don't need to go out. Everybody else needs to go out and network, but I am above that. No, you're not. Would you rather be right, or would you rather be rich? Would you rather make money, or would you rather talk about money? Get out. Get out of the shadows.
A lot of people, especially now, we become conditioned to be in the shadows. People are playing more video games than ever. They're scrolling the algo more than ever. And all that leads up to one thing: staying in the shadows. And you will lose to somebody who's less skilled than you, less intelligent than you, but who stays out of the shadows, who gets out once a week. It's not, it's not rocket science. You don't have to do it 10 times a week. You know, you don't have to be ridiculous.
People go, "Oh, well, don't you need silence to be a genius?" Of course you do. You need a variety of things to do big things. Get out of the shadows. Get a little more extroverted. You'll thank me one day. A little more extraversion is going to change the game.
Why do I love books? Why do I love networking? I do both of them on a repeated habit. You are the accumulation of repeated habits. People who continually and repeatedly read, they're downloading the wisdom of the ancients. You can't meet people, say, "Oh, I don't need to read because I can, you know, listen to a podcast." Socrates didn't podcast. Aristotle didn't podcast. Albert Einstein didn't podcast. Leonardo da Vinci didn't podcast. You've got to use books. They're imperfect tools, but they're all we have to download the wisdom of the ancients.
Of course, in the modern world, that's why I network. I can go out and meet people that are alive right now. I don't need a book, although I like books because sometimes people will summarize very quickly what you, what'll take forever to ask them. Why is this damn thing there? We go.
So, some simple tools to network better. Number one: Don't show up at a networking event just with the intention to take, take, take, take, take. Do a little giving. Come with some interesting insight from your life that you can part, that others can partake in, so that you're a person who adds value. Everybody can smell a leech. A leech is always taking and not giving. It's a parasite. Never be a parasite. Be a person that has what's called tit for tat. For everything you learn from somebody, you have something to offer them. And if you feel like you have imposter syndrome and, "I don't have anything to give," get over it. You always have something to give. You too have lived. You too are stardust. The atoms, the elements inside your body too come from the same stars as everybody else.
Okay, so don't be cocky, but be confident. That's number two. Don't be cocky, but be confident. Go in the room, the networking party, the networking event, knowing everybody's just as insecure as you. They're just as insecure as you, my brother and my sister. So, so I highly recommend you just assume that it's okay for you to be confident because whatever level of confidence or insecurity you feel, everybody else is feeling basically the same way. Okay?
And then number three: Just try to make one contact at an event. You don't have to make 50 contacts because this is becoming a repeated habit of your mind. The repeated habits of the mind are what, when the repeated habits put into action are what win. So going to a networking event once and getting 40 people's phone numbers is not effective. It's better to go to 40 networking events over 40 weeks and just get one contact each time. Kiss, kiss. Old school. Keep it simple. Confucius: "The man who chases two rabbits catches none." So you just go.
It's the same with a book. Every time I read a book, because I know I can reread it, I'm just trying to get one piece of info that's relevant for my life out of that book. One. I don't need eight. I don't need 43. I need one. Okay?
So, my three hacks. These are very important. Don't overthink them. Come with a, come there to add value to others. Have confidence knowing whatever insecurities you have, everyone else has. And number three: Just try to get one good contact out of that networking event. And then the bonus fourth one: Do this repeatedly. Like Bruce Lee said, you know, he didn't fear the man who practiced one kick one day a thousand times. He feared the man that practiced once a day, just one kick, but for a thousand straight days. Habits and success is built by repetition.
So now, where can you go to network? Let's talk about that for a second. Some places are better than others for networking. Some countries are very introverted. I was just in Sweden. Sweden's not the best networking place. It's a glorious country. Denmark, not the best network if you don't know people already because it's a more introverted society. I love Denmark, no hate, but for specifically for that, it's not its superpower. America is more extroverted. Brazil's more extroverted. Australians are more extroverted. So in general, a little warmer places. I like. I'm here in Beverly Hills, Los Angeles is a great place to go. So travel a little bit to places that attract extroverted people, even if you're an introvert. Where you choose to network matters. You're going to have an easier networking in Miami or in Beverly Hills. LA, by the way, is just the easiest place. Everybody's here, optimistic, trying to make their fame and fortune. You go to a party and talk to everybody. Guys who are insecure with women, you can talk to everybody. Just walk up to them and say, "Hey, great fan of your acting." And they'll be like, "Ah." Even if you don't know who they are, just assume everybody wants to be famous in LA. So networking, the right, the right literal city matters. It's a much harder. Don't start your networking career in, you know, Lithuania. Those countries are quieter. They have their friend group. You can still do it, though. So don't get me wrong. I'm not saying you have to. I'm just saying for me, this is what I do. Take it or leave it. I travel and specifically spend some time in extroverted places. Like my farm. I don't go to network. I mean, I got cows, I got horses, I got a neighbor a mile away here, a mile away there. It's not a great networking place. It's a great for friendships and family building, a family legacy, but not for networking.
Now, uh, the other thing, what are the best events? Um, I think parties are the best. So specific when you see the label is like, "Come to this, I don't know, real estate networking thing." Those are usually not quite as good. Why? Because the best people don't show up at those because they're not fun and they're just people like handing out business cards and trying to get your phone number. But so I like just regular parties. House parties are the best networking I've ever seen. Second best is like conferences. So conference, but the house parties, you don't know anybody. But if you don't know anyone, find somebody in the city, ask around, who throws the best house parties? Because the big ballers, I used to throw house parties up in the Hollywood Hills before I was here in Beverly Hills, and that the first time billionaires started showing up at my events. I didn't call them networking parties. I was like, "Yo, I'm going to have food, drinks, beautiful people, fun music, sunlight, pool." And all of a sudden, A-list celebrities started rolling in. All of a sudden, you know, big money. First time I really met somebody worth more than $800 million, he rolled into the party, friend of a friend. So house parties disarm people and they bring a higher quality of people. So really try to, and throw your own house parties.
Hugh Hefner, not that he was the best networker, but I mean, well, actually, Hugh Hefner probably was one of the great networkers of all time. Forget, you know, some people don't agree with some of the things he did. Forget that. The man was a genius. And he said, "I never go to someone else's party because people open up more when you welcome them." Welcome to my party. So I started throwing parties back in 2002, Lime Bay Lane in Raleigh, North Carolina, little apartment complex. It's still there on Google Maps. So people started showing up to my parties. Now I'm doing a party, uh, coming up. Okay, I'm going to put a link below if you want to come to one of my house parties. I do a two-day event. First day is like business. Second day is just pure house party. Okay? Um, it's kind of invite only, but if you want to apply to come, sometimes I'll do tickets, sometimes I'll do application only. Click this link right below, right here.