Transcription
But this is something, well, they're going to think this of me, and they're going to think that of me. You know, how can I do this, Brandon? How can I put myself out there? These people are going to say that. Like, you know what? Stop worrying about what these people are going to say about you, and start worrying about what you're going to say to yourself on that rocking chair at 80 years old. Start worrying about what the future you is going to whisper to your mind in the mirror if you don't do what you want to do.
You've got a big session of high-performance training today for you. We're going to talk about why is it so hard to change, but what you can do about it. I'm going to tell you about the fails that people usually have in their lives, the fears that they're struggling to come over, and the frustrations that block them. And then I'll tell you how the heck do you get over all of those things. So we'll be talking about your habits. We will be talking about the relationships you need to create to support you in your dreams. We'll be talking about where you suck, where you are good, and what you need to do to make this year extraordinary.
It's an honor to be here with you again. As usual, I'm here with a bad haircut and a great attitude, so I'm really excited to have you. So, your job: Journal. Drink water. Write down your notes, your breakthroughs, the things that really move you. And let's start thinking about this year in a big way. My job in high-performance training is always job one: Raise your ambition and your disciplines that are possible to make those ambitions come true.
Today, today we're going to go into a very, very mindset and habit-driven session for you, so that you can understand where do most people fail. I mean, when you set a new habit or a new goal, or you've got your New Year's resolutions and you're like, "I'm ready to crush it," or you start the first of the month and you're ready to go, and then you lose momentum. Why? It's usually because of one of these four reasons we're going to train about today. Okay?
Number two: Why do people get stuck so often? They're often stuck in the four fears. They don't know how to overcome them, and so they kind of just sit, wait, don't act, or become a jerk. And now they're struggling to get ahead. And then they get frustrated. Even if they can not do these things and overcome these things, so many people get so frustrated because of these four things that they ruin relationships, they stop their momentum, they take too many days off watching Netflix. They get in that place where they're just, you know, so worked up emotionally with anger or regret or resentment or vitriol that they're not able to maintain the absolute positive energy and emotions required to succeed.
And you know this to be true, right? If you've ever studied for me with high performance, I'm here to tell you you can achieve more, but you don't have to freak out about it because it doesn't have to have to come at the cost of your health. It doesn't have to come at the cost of your well-being, or your relationships, or your time with your family. And you know, in our master's program, I'm constantly hearing from students all the time who say, "Well, you know, Brendan, I, I, you know, how do you get so much more done and still maintain family, still maintain health, and keep a positive attitude when all this stress comes on you when, of course, you're trying to achieve more things?" I mean, I know a lot of you guys are stressed, right? I mean, we're only, you know, so far into this year, but still, so many people are like, "I'm stressed. I don't know what to do with it." Or, you know, "I started off the year so excited, and now I'm already like burned out. What am I going to do?"
And just so you know, that's normal. So calm down, stop hating yourself, and let's have a positive session today where you really think about what's important to you in your life right now, how you really want to feel, how you really want to contribute, how you really just want to experience the best possible life. You know, we all call it high-performance living in my training. And high-performance living just means that you feel full engagement, you know, presence in this moment, that you have joy in your heart and in your soul, and that you are confident in your ability to deliver, in your ability to show up, in your ability to make your difference. If you've got full engagement, joy, and confidence in anything you have, that's what we call high-performance living.
And now I want to get into our training. This one specifically is a mindset for momentum. So in your journals, write it down: Big capital letters, "Momentum, baby! Let's get it!" This needs to be the year of momentum and breakthrough for you, okay? So if we're going to make that happen, we've got to get at it. We really got to get at it. So what's the challenge? Well, the challenge is, it's hard to have a positive mindset when so often you fail to do some basics, and when so often you get stuck in your fears, and when so often you get frustrated with yourself.
So this is the session today. We will also be covering today: How do you take an idea and move it into massive action quickly? Because I bet this time of year, especially, you've got big dreams. You have big hopes. You think, "Oh, I'm going to change this," or "I'm going to do that," or "I'm going to chase that dream in my small business," or "start a business," or "in my career," or "I'm going to make this pitch finally." You probably have something you really want to move forward. So we're going to talk about both the mindset and the actions required on a daily, and weekly, and monthly basis to allow you to do that.
How is that for the longest-winded opening in the history of high-performance training? I thought that was pretty good. It was a good run right there. I thought it was a lot of wind, but you know, hey, we're here, and now let's get going.
Four fails. What's the reason most people don't get the momentum necessary to move ahead? Okay, and I really want you to think about this. Gauge yourself right now on what level of momentum you feel you have in your life. Let's say one out of ten, okay? One, you don't have any momentum. Like, matter of fact, you're dead. Basically, you're dead at one, okay? You're dead. You're not moving. That's total blockage, okay? Five, you're doing pretty good. You're clipping ahead, taking some actions on a daily basis. Ten, you feel like you are absolutely crushing it, okay? You're absolutely disciplined, focused, motivated, making it happen. Where are you?
Now, as you think about that number range, maybe in your journal, write it out: "Momentum, baby!" I ask you, write that down. "Momentum, baby!" And then score yourself. Are you at a three, a four, or five? A ten? And whatever your number is, don't get upset at yourself or your spouse. Don't kick the dog. Whatever your number is, that's the number, okay? Our job is to say, "Well, how do we increase that number? How do we get a little better at that?" Okay? That's what we're going to be talking about today.
Now, here's my first proposition to today, and that is, I believe that whatever that number is on momentum, there is a reason for that. When people don't get more momentum, or they set a habit or goal and they say, "I'm going to achieve that," but they don't. I believe one of the main reasons why is this first fail: People fail to see beyond now. They fail. They see their current circumstances right now. They go, "Oh my God, I've got bills to pay. Oh my God, I got in that fight last night. Oh, oh my God, I haven't done work for three months, so why would I do it now?" They get stuck because all their vision is stuck now.
And I know this from even high performers, very successful people who I've been able to be blessed to work with, whether I'm working with an Olympian, literally a billionaire, or having the opportunity to network, associate, coach, connect with some of the most extraordinary people in the world. One of the things that I always have to do in the conversations with them is move their mindset and their conversation pattern from today to the future. Because what's the opposite? If you are stuck in today and you don't believe today can change, that you're going to be right here all the time. This is just the way you are. That this is just what your income's always going to be the same. You're never going to make any more money. You're never going to impact more people. You're never going to get out of that argument pattern. And you're just focused on that. That quickly leads to upset, hurt, turmoil, negative emotion, and ultimately to depression.
And because you know what's one way to help somebody move out of those bad emotions? You start moving them towards their future again. Give them something to look to that inspires them, that challenges them, that makes them want to be something more. And this is what I tell people all the time. I say, "You want momentum in your life? Start expecting something from yourself again beyond what is today." Right? Because maybe you're already good. You're like, "Brent, I'm watching this. I'm, I got my thing down, homie." Maybe that's where you're at. But sometimes your next level is expect even more of yourself. That have that. It's truly that hunger inside, that higher standard that says, "You know what? I want my life to be so significantly better."
And then when you say that, don't get depressed or upset because what people say, "I want my life to be so better, but it's so bad. Look at all these things." And all they do is they're focused on today. See, they're failing to see beyond now. "I want the big dream, but it sucks now." And then they spend hours thinking about how it sucks now, and they're like, "I wonder why I can't get motivated." Because if you spend hours thinking about how it sucks now, you will generate the negative emotional reality that will keep you stuck in that now. It is our job to look beyond the now, right? Yes, be fully engaged. Yes, be fully present. But if you want momentum, you need to raise your ambitions. And when you raise your ambitions, you stay stuck right there. You see that person, feel that person, be that person. You're there, not here.
And it is so hard for people to learn that. And I don't say that flippantly. It was the same thing for me. You know, I, I was in a place in my life, just like I'm sure you have been sometimes in your life, where I didn't like who I was. Didn't like how I was showing up. Didn't like how I was treating the people around me. Hated myself for not having any finances. Hated myself for not feeding myself more, you know, nutritionally balanced, good meals. Hated myself for seeing all my friends doing better than me. Hated myself for seeing other people in the industry doing better than me. Like, we all have that stupid comparison thing that we do, or that stupid limiting thing that we do to ourselves where we put ourselves down. And the only breakthrough is going to come from seeing beyond it.
So here we are at the beginning of the year. You know, lots of people have big visions for the future. But you know, by day five, ten, the first month of the year, they take their eyes off that big resolution, that big dream, and they're back in the now. And they go, "Yeah, I had those hopes and dreams being in the year, but, you know, this is what it's about." And then here's the tell. Listen to the words. This is their fail. They're always talking only about now. Like, you get around them, they only talk about the freaking weather. They only talk about, you know, everything that's due now. Everything that's challenging them now. It's always just a conversation about, "Oh, here's what's in front of me." I guess it's, it's always, listen to the words. Literally, it's the words. The communication pattern in their mind, their mindset is coming out their mouth, and it's coming out their mouth all over you. And it's just like complaining about all these things now. Or even if it's not complaining, it's only seeing what is here. So they only talk about this project. They only talk about this email. They only talk about this medical report. They only talk about what's going on right now. And I always hear that, I go, "That person's in trouble." How can you maintain momentum if all you do is acknowledge what is right here?
By the way, I'm not saying that it's not important to acknowledge what is here, to discuss it, to engage it. I'm just saying if you don't also see beyond it and live into a higher truth for yourself, live into that future you, despite where you've been yesterday, then you're going to get stuck. And remember, I promise this is a session that is about momentum. I said it's high-performance training, so it's a little bit advanced. I'll challenge you and I'll push you. And you'll have to forgive me if any time it sounds like I'm being, you know, flippant or rude or anything. I promise I'm not. I just know that my, my audience appreciates the challenge. You're here because you love personal development, you love growth, you love that success mindset that makes you feel good in life. So I am here to push you. I will challenge you. I hope that's okay. My job is to make sure that wherever you are right now, you can see tomorrow, man. You can see next week. That you start putting in your vocabulary dreams again. That you start putting in your vocabulary a year out, five years out, 10 years out. That you can see in your mind yourself on that rocking chair at the end of your life, rocking back and forth, talking with your family and your friends about what you've done in your life that you're proud about, about the things you are grateful happened for you, about the amazing, bold, crazy, fun adventures you've had in your life.
Even if today you're aware, like maybe I was one point in my life, I was stuck in a 454-foot tiny little apartment. I was super broke. I was, uh, my bed was in the closet because in San Francisco, California, they call a junior one-bedroom, that means it's a studio where most people put their bed in the closet. So my bed is in the closet, my clothes are hanging above me. I'm literally sleeping under the clothes of the rack in my apartment. And, uh, you know, it was a tough time. All of my money going to my rent, trying to figure out, you know, how to just buy groceries, to trying to figure out how to just, you know, do I, do I buy the bus pass for the month or not because I might run out of money? Like stupid things like that that I had to deal with. And I'm sure sometimes, you know, or you've been in that place too, where finances are a big drag on you. And what happens is when you don't have enough money, you, it's very, very easy to get stuck only here and to stop dreaming because you're so desperate in the moment. And nothing screws people up like scarcity and fear and frustration in the moment preventing them from seeing the bigger picture.
You know what's the bigger picture for you now? What's the next level for you now? And I want you to see that. But here's the challenge. I know you already know this, but you know what most people do? They go, "Yeah, yeah, I got you, Brandon. Yeah, I hear you, man. Yeah, yeah." You know, you take your casual notes, you think, "I know this, Brendan. This is really high-performance training, Brendan." Well, here's my question: Did you have a morning routine this morning where you saw that future? Or are you just right here with me now and just now thinking about it? I mean, this morning when you woke up, did you do something to see beyond your day's tasks? To see beyond your day's obligations? Did you lay awake in bed for just a moment before you got about and you thought about a year from now?
You know, I remember when I was in college and I was just given one of my first talks in college, and it sucked. It was really terrible. And, uh, uh, I remember laying there, though, the next morning, and I just laid in bed, and I just thought about one day speaking to an arena full of people. Now, the thing is, the night before that, I spoke. I sucked. I had no talent, no skill, no confidence. Uh, I was embarrassed. It was no good. No good. And yet, how am I laying in bed thinking about commanding an arena full of people? How could I possibly have vision for that? What is, is that ego? That wasn't ego. It was dreams, man. It was hope, man. It was allowing myself to dream of a possibility that was not here. And that's what you have to do. Because if you're only stuck here, this is, I can't tell you. It sounds so simple, but this is such a fail point for people to get momentum. Because you know what? If you can't see the next steps, why would you maintain the role? If you can't see the next steps, why would you keep going? If you can't see the future, why would you just go, "Well, I'm good," and you just sit there? Like, you need to see it to start moving towards it, right? It's the oldest school of, you know, school of hard knocks and personal development. If you can't see, you can't achieve it. If you don't believe it, you won't do it. You know, all of this. My question will continually be back to you, bringing it into a daily or a weekly practice. Common sense is not always common practice, and that's why so many people fail to achieve their greatness.
So if you think this is all basic, here's my question: Your morning, did you look out beyond the morning? Did you look beyond the day? Did you look far out? That's the first fail.
Second fail is they fail to feel the consequence of now, if it was maintained. What I mean by that, notice the first word, and write this down, double underline this one, baby, double underline this one: Feel. They fail to feel the consequence, right? They're sitting down with their second order of Pad Thai, and they're not thinking, "Wow, I'm going to feel like hell tomorrow." Because in the moment, it feels good, even though it's bad behavior. And yes, I have been guilty of that. I'm a Pad Thai kind of guy. But listen, that's the challenge that people have. They're not knowingly seeing the future. They're not feeling the future consequence. Like, I remember when I was bankrupt, literally bankrupt, and I was thinking, "This is the very beginning of my career. I have no idea what I was doing." Um, you know, back then, there was no kind of programs like an expert's academy teaches how to do what my career is. I had no idea. And so my challenge was, I couldn't really see what to do. But I remember feeling that consequence. I thought, "If I don't figure out these finances, and I let myself feel the consequence, I let myself..." It was okay. Most people, they'll do anything they can to avoid pain, and thus they also avoid feeling the consequence of poor behavior. Does that make sense? Instead of feeling the consequence of poor behavior and imagining their life turning out crappy, well, that'd be scary. So they just avoid the future, stay in the comfort of today, and don't feel the consequences of not turning it around. Even though they'll say, "I'm in pain. I feel so bad." No, no, no, no. You just feel bad about now. You're not feeling that. Look, if you don't change five years from now, you're going to feel much worse. Just like tomorrow morning, that second Pad Thai is going to kick your butt. They don't feel the consequence of not doing what they know they should do. Does that make sense?
Like, I bet you have a list of five things you know you should do, right? And people do it all morning. They write down the to-do list, and they think about it. But if you've got that one to-do that is carrying over from Monday to Tuesday, and Tuesday, Wednesday, do you have any lists, and there's that one line item that keeps coming over day to day and week to week, like the carry-over to-do? I call it, "Do you have any carry-over to-do's?" You know what the problem with that carry-over to-do is? You have not yet felt what happens if that doesn't happen. So it's easy to swipe it on the next day's to-do list and swipe it on the next day. There's no consequence. Just swipe it along. Just keep swiping that to-do list in the future because you're not going, "Holy crap, if I don't do that, the dominoes are going to start to fall. If I don't do that, tragedy's coming. If I don't do that, I won't be where I want to be. If I don't do that, I won't get that respect, or that income, or that thing that I'm really, you know, in, I'm passionate about having." And people do that all the time. And I know you know what I'm talking about here.
But I also think that they fail to feel the consequence of the good things too, right? So, let me go back to me in my public speaking career where I'm thinking about standing in front of arenas. I'm like, "Who am I to stand in front of an arena?" Right? And then, but I could feel it. I, I could, little, I could visualize walking out, kind of like, like the, you know, the Super Bowl athletic teams walk out of the tunnel. I could walk out of the tunnel, and I could feel it. I could feel the nerves of it all. And I could feel myself walking up on the stairs, literally feeling a step under the stairs, walking up onto the big stage. And I could feel all of the anxiety of it all. And I could walk up, and I could feel myself literally, I know it sounds weird, feel myself saying the words. Like, I could feel how my face felt as I said those first words in a big speech. I could totally feel that. And then what? I could feel the roar of the audience after I finished my speech. I could feel it. I can feel what happened when I walked off stage, and I felt that rush of having done my mission despite my fears. I didn't not feel the fear or not feel the anxiety. I allowed myself to feel it all. And then I felt the reward afterwards. Does it make sense?
Look, your vision of your life must have feelings associated with it, otherwise it's just kind of mental projections. And a lot of people have mental projections, but that's why their mental projections don't become habits is because they haven't felt that yet, right? You don't create any habits in your life until there's feeling and emotions attached to something. Trust me, you can intellectualize all day long. "I'm going to do these goals. I'm going to start this new habit. I'm going to do these things." But if you don't feel the consequence of not doing those things, you won't set the habit, right? Almost all of your lack of discipline, and this is not being flippant with you, it's just being honest. Almost all of your lack of discipline comes from the failure to feel the consequence of not being disciplined. It doesn't matter to you, in other words. It doesn't matter if I'm not disciplined. I know I said I'd go to the gym. Doesn't matter. You're not feeling that fatigue that you will feel five years from now. You're not feeling that horrible body you'll have five years from now. You're not feeling that sense of, "Just like, I wish I had taken care of myself." You're not allowing regret in your life because, as you will hear, one of the major fears we have is regret. So you just, you just avoid it. And now you avoid the workout. And your life is a life of avoidance. There is no high-performance life with a lot of avoidance in it. Doesn't happen. Like, you've got to get rid of the avoidance. You've got to allow yourself to feel again. Like this is the most important thing for you to get back in touch with your emotions, both here in the moment, but also your emotions for the future. Like, I, I know a lot of people have never have felt anything in the future before, and I feel so sad for them because I'm like, "Boy, the future feels good." I mean, the future feels really good. Why would you not want to fantasize and dream and hope? And I know why you wouldn't because you're scared one of these things will happen, or you've been on the road long enough and you think, "Well, Brendan, this is my reality." And so you're not allowing yourself to feel the future. Feel the future, man. It will change your life.
Every morning that I wake up, part of my little simple thing that I do when I'm thinking about the strategic projects I'm working on, I mean, at a very, like, I know, like an engineering type mind, like I've got my clear list of like, here's the major projects I'm working on. I allow myself to feel those projects and get excited about them, right? It's one of my first questions in the shower every morning is, "What could I be excited about today?" And even though I got to make something up every morning, I'm going to start in the emotion of excitement for the day, even if I have to generate it, even if I have to dream of something, fake it. It doesn't matter because I know if I can start from a place of enthusiasm, I'm in a place of power. It makes sense. That's feeling everything I can about the day. But feel the future. Write it down in your journal. For, write it down. "Feel the future." Double underline that. Put a star. Draw a unicorn or a happy face, whatever your thing is. Bust out that purple marker, go crazy. Get the purple marker. You're going to go nuts. But make it clear: "Feel the future."
Number three: What else do people fail out? They fail to do the research. "I want to lose weight. I want to lose weight. I want to lose weight. I can feel losing weight. I can see myself thinner. It'd be great." But then they'd go, "Gosh, I wonder what would be a healthy diet. I, I wonder what would be the best workout routine." And what do they do? They go watch one YouTube video and they go, "Oh, well, I guess, I guess I can't do that." I'm like, "No, no. You want to be a high performer? You do your homework." And you do your homework daily, every day, every day you're trying to learn, trying to do things, testing things out, measuring things with that scientific, scientific approach. That every day you're doing your homework. What worked today? What didn't work today? Do you know how many people I know don't ask that question at the end of the day? You know what more people at the end of the day go? "What do we watch on Netflix?" Then ask, "What worked today? What didn't work today?" I mean, sometimes you just gotta get. High performance is about the fundamentals. Discipline. Common sense applied over and over and over and over again. So at the end of the day, I go, "What worked today?" That's research. It's a scientific mind. It's saying, "Hmm, where am I? Where do I want to go? What's working? What's not working?" And noticing what's working and amplifying that. But you've got to start with doing the homework for your dreams.
You know, when I began, I, I had to. I went to seminars and bought courses and read books on how to write books. I, I went to speaking classes on how to speak. I read everything I could about people in my industry or great leaders in history who I could learn from from their communication patterns. I, I started reading a book a week when I was 19 years old, which is like a big dream of mine. And, uh, I'm now at what, 20 plus years later, I'm in my 40s, and that I've read a book a week and I've only missed three weeks. I get one week if I'm, if I'm honest, there's been four weeks now, but I don't count that week because there was, you know, what's none of your business. I just didn't count that week. But anyway, I've been reading a lot of books because I'm always doing homework. I think it's important. You being here, I honor you because you're asking the question, "Brennan, take me to high performance." I'm happy to do that here, or in my master's program, or any of our other programs. But you're here. So write it down. What's the homework that you need to do to get to your next level? And what does it mean?
And listen, all research or all homework, it's got to be diligent and consistent. You don't do it once and then forget about it. Just like you don't go to grad school and you, you know, you watch, you know, you go to four classes in the first week and then you don't come back again. You've got to stay in class, man. Stay in class. It is the one, my most quoted phrases now for performance habits is that if you leave your growth to randomness, you'll always be stuck in the land of mediocrity. Doing your research means designing your curriculum. A lot of people fail to get any momentum because they learn just enough and they just do that, but they never kept learning. So they never drew a bigger circle. If you keep learning and doing the research, you draw the bigger circle.
And sometimes it's going to cost you money, straight up. Again, I have nothing to sell in this live webcast, but I'll share my story of investing in my own learning. I remember I wanted to figure out online marketing. You know, how do I get people to, you know, buy programs or enroll in programs or get their email or build my social media? And I remember I didn't understand quite how to do these things. So I did the research. I hit the road. I went to a couple different seminars to learn it. And it came to a point where I had to, you know, make the big, scary investment for me at the time was like, buy a system. You know, like in, you know, get a system that would capture names and emails called a CRM. And I didn't know how to do any of that. And I remember I kind of had a vision. I wanted to do a big promotion, but I didn't know how to use the system. So I called up that company. I'll never forget it. I called up the company and I said, "Hey, um, could I come down and just sit down with one of your guys? I'm trying to research and figure out how to do something very specific. I want to do this type of launch promotion, but I don't know how to use your technology. Did I come around your office?" And they're like, "Oh, we don't, we don't really do that." I said, "Yeah, but you know, I, um, could I just come down and like, pay one of your best guys to sit and explain this to me?" "Well, we have classes coming up, you know, in this month or that." I said, "No, no, I just, I'm kind of dumb, so I want to pay to sit down with one person who can show me this and literally press the buttons and show me. I don't need a tutorial. I mean, just one dude to show me this." And they're like, "Well, we don't really do that." I said, "You know, just, could you go ask somebody?" And so they find somebody, and I never, it was like, if I remember, it was like $300 bucks or something. So I bought a plane ticket. And at the time, the plane ticket was, you know, a big deal for me to fly down and stay at a hotel. I didn't have a lot of money. And I had to buy the system. So it was like three big expenses: plane ticket, hotel, and the system itself. And I sat down with this guy, I think it was like $300 bucks an hour or something, and he sat down, and he wanted to teach me all these other things. I just need to know this thing for now, just this one first move. We're going to talk about that today, that one first move. I said, "Oh, okay, I get that. Um, all right. Uh, well, let me show you." And he showed me. I took that one thing. Now, I invested to do the research to figure it out. Because, you know what I would have done? I would have, I, I wouldn't have shortened my learning curve. I would have just kept trying everything else. One of the biggest things that high performers do is they're always trying to do the research that will shorten their learning curve, right? They're looking for the tricks, they're looking for the hacks, they're, they're looking for the short-term strategy that will get them the greater future bump. Even though they're willing for the long haul play, they're also going, "I'm going to fill it. I'm going to figure that that short term thing I need to figure out. Figure it out."
Long story short, I left there, and I believe it was two or three weeks later, it's probably about three weeks later, that I went, I did my first million-dollar online promotion with that one thing I invested in for research. That's commitment to the research. It's commitment to figuring things out that makes a high performer, high performer. Does that make sense? But you've got to do the learning, and you can't wait for the learning to happen to you. I had to go look for the learning, go pay for the learning, go acquire the learning. Nobody's going to come in and save you. You've got to go on the hunt to figure things out. That's what I mean by doing the research. When people fail to get that momentum, they're usually not researching anymore. And if you don't know anything new, you don't do anything new. That's why you need research.
Last big piece: You've got to set the block time. Maybe the most fundamental productivity secret in the world, which is amazing, it's still a secret. You've got to block specific time to do one thing. It is not where you go in to the hour and you're going to do something for five minutes and check your phones. No, no, no. It's this hour, or this 30 minutes, or whatever this block is. Nothing happens but work. No distractions because you remove the distractions, or you set the boundaries. You've been clear with the kids, "The door's shut, Mom's in doing work." Like, you've got to set the boundaries that are real, and you've got to do the work. You need consistent block time to maintain momentum.
Here's what happens with people. They go, "At the beginning of the year, I'm going to lose weight. I mean, it's so healthy, it's going to be awesome." And what do they do? They go to the gym, how many times? Once. And then they, the next week, they hope that they go to the gym. They don't say, "Three to five on Wednesday, gym with Sally." No, they just, they bumble into that week and go, "I hope I go to the gym." If you hope you're going to do something, you're never going to do it. You must schedule it. If it's not on the schedule, it is not real. And that is the most important thing. If it's not on the schedule, it is not real. You're not going to do it because you know what's going to take up your time? Distraction. Other people's priorities. Texts, voice messages, new videos, new something will always come in to fill the void. Isn't it true? Like, you can hope for white space, but isn't it true? I mean, think of how many things you've been waiting to do, and you keep thinking, "Ah, one day I'll do them." That one day I'll do them is the hope for white space and the failure to block the time. That's it. The secret of almost all momentum comes down to good old-fashioned 1909 time management. This hour, this thing happens. How simple is that?
Especially for some of you, I know you're like me, you work from home, so you're like, "I got that freedom. I can do what I want, whenever. Nobody cares. I'm in my Lululemon still. It's four o'clock. My hair is over here." And you think, "Well, it doesn't matter because, you know what? I've got that lifestyle. I've got that blog. I'm that freedom." And yet, you're so ineffective and efficient that you're stealing your own dream. Because at least one hour of the day, you didn't block it out to say, "This is what's happening, baby." I tell my team this. I teach my audiences this. The, the goal, the focus, the thing that we all have to do is block time. And when we block that time, we weaponize that time. We show up. We are prepared. We are ready. We are disciplined. We're going to bring everything we've got, all the intensity, all the focus in that time, not 50 other things. That's setting block time, okay?
I got to talk about your four fears. If you've been in my master's program, you've probably heard me talking about these, so I'll go fairly quickly, but these are really important for you, okay? These are the four fears that are probably holding you back from doing something, um, in terms of a discipline or repetition or habit that is positive, right? The reason people don't get momentum at this time of year is because they could set all the dreams in the world, but these things hold them back.
The number one fear that most people have. The number one fear that most people have is what? Challenge it. What do you think is the number one fear that most people have? What is it? What's yours? Do you know yours? I bet it's not what you think it is. Most people actually aren't aware of the fears they actually have, right? A lot of the fears are unconscious. They'll say, "Well, you know, I'm pure. I won't be loved." Really? Let's, let's talk through that one a little bit. Let's break it down. What's the real feeling? And I'll tell you one of the primary fears that people have all the time that they don't acknowledge and aren't aware of, and the reason they're not moving ahead is because in their head, they've globalized the fear of failure to this thing: ruin. You want to know what humans fear? Ruin. Where you screw up so much that you've gone over the precipice, and there is no coming back. That's what people are scared of. They're so scared they're going to face ruin, financial ruin, reputation ruin, ruin in their ability to come back. Like, they're terrified. So they don't try new things.
You know why most CEOs fail and break their company? It's not because they're not even, it's not because they don't have a business mind. It's not because they're not smart. It's not because they're not good people. What ends up happening is they fear trying new things because they think the new things will ruin the good things they already have, right? It's not fear of failure because they already got momentum. They're already pretty good. They think, "If I try those new things, it will come at an opportunity cost of the things I already have going, and it will ruin the good I already have." We all think it's so catastrophic in what people fear. And often, we're right. What I've noticed is the distinction on top of that is that people consistently think, "Well, you know, if I try those new things, I, I'm going to, I'm going to ruin what's good." If I take on more, well, I'm going to ruin my family. If I take on more, well, I'll ruin my ability to vacation and have free time. If I take on more, I'll ruin my health. I'll be stressed all the time. And those things aren't necessarily true.
So we think of, they, people really do, they think of doing good things, but they say, "Well, it will ruin the good things I already have." That's usually the psychological twist. We always think, "Well, if I, you know, try these new things, I'll ruin, you know, something else." No, it's usually people are fearful of screwing up a good thing. They think, "If I try any new things, I'll ruin this good thing." Because people love the status quo. They love comfort. And so innovation, they think, "Well, if I innovate, I'll screw up what I'm already good at over here. I like this over here. I don't want to ruin and take on something new." This makes sense. I don't want to ruin it and take on something new. So CEOs all the time, they don't innovate. And the funny thing is, they don't innovate because they think they'll ruin what they have. But by not innovating, they ruin the future. And so many people think, "Well, I'm, that's not for us. We won't try that." And by not trying new strategies, new tools, new ideas, new business models, new financial flows, new whatever, they actually do end up meeting the fear that they had. They ruin what they had because they weren't willing to change.
And this is an important one to recognize. So, is there any part of your psychology where you felt like, "Well, if I try that, I'll ruin this good thing"? Because that's usually what's preventing the momentum in your life, trying those new things. And making sure that you don't generalize or catastrophize, right? That's what people do. They make, they pretend like, "Well, if I fail this little thing, then I'm a disaster." Right? They won't like, they're like, "Oh, I can't put up that new video because it will ruin my reputation forever." I'm like, "One video is going to ruin your reputation forever? Really? One?" I mean, I've seen some pretty bad videos that made that you would think it would ruin their reputation. It made their reputation Kardashian. But, you know, things happen. And I see it over and over and over again that you think, "Oh, I'm going to ruin." No, one thing's not going to ruin you. Stop thinking that. That one thing is, you know what? It's going to be. Most people die by a million paper cuts, not one. It's if you keep doing stupid actions over and over and over. But you know what? Most of the world will let you screw up a few times. It's true. So you've got to get over this ruinous thinking, right? "If I try this new thing." People tell me in my expert space all the time, "Well, Brenda, I'm thinking about, you know, changing my topic. I used to write about relationships, and now I want to write about goals. But I figure if I think I start writing about goals, I'm going to ruin my reputation." I'm like, "Oh my God, I cannot believe I'm having this discussion with a 50-year-old person right now." That's what I'm talking about. It's stupid thinking. And I want you to be aware of it. We all have it. We all have it. So where is your ruinous thinking? What have you wanted to try to be thought, "Well, that'll ruin something else"? If you become more aware of that, I promise that would be one of the great breakthroughs of your entire lifetime because this is one of the great fears: catastrophe. There's no, there's not going to be catastrophe.
There's not. I, here's the one for entrepreneurs. I bet a lot of you can acknowledge this down the chat road below. Isn't it true some of you thought that if you quit your job, you would ruin your life? And yet, you quit your job and you made it. I did. I thought if I quit this job that I liked, that's safe, that's recurring, then it will ruin my life and I'll be broke forever. Oh my God, stupid ruinous thinking. You know what? Because you know what? You will figure it out. It's one of the central tenants that we teach in high-performance confidence: Believe in your ability to figure things out. You're not going to ruin anything. You'll figure it out. You're a good person. You'll figure it out. And.
You'll figure it out, and you figure it out. Maybe it takes some time. Maybe you do have some failures. Maybe some people make fun of you. Maybe you make fun of yourself. But you're not gonna. There is no ruin, right? The only real ruin that actually happens for people that there's no comeback from is irresponsible behavior at levels that are so high that it rarely ever happens. So stop thinking that you just can't take that next step. Take the next step. I always say, what's the next step of integrity for me? Write it down. What's the next step of integrity for me? Figure out what it is for yourself and sort of self-diagnose. It will help you a ton.
Next up, another big fear that holds people back. I know I'm going a little bit long, but I hope you guys are liking this. If you are, give me a shout out in the chat. Roll down below. Number two, people fear rejection, and they're just like, so concerned about rejection. And if you ever studied anything I teach, I'm always saying, rejection is not real. Rejection is not real. And I know many of you guys know it. I can tell you about this person. Hold on. It barely ever happens. You had so few people in your life that rejected you versus the number of people that you interacted with, talked with, and knew. And if you just do the math and the ratios, we do this High Performance Academy all the time. I literally do a whole session on the math. Most people don't even know what you're doing. They're not rejecting you. You're going to get so few rejections in your life, so few that the number of acceptances are extraordinary compared to the number of rejections. But this is something, well, they're going to think this of me, and they're going to think that of me. You know, how could I do this, Brendan? How can I put myself out there? These people are going to say that. Like, you know what? Stop worrying about what these people are going to say about you and start worrying about what you're going to say to yourself on that rocking chair at 80 years old. Start worrying about what the future you is going to whisper to your mind in the mirror if you don't do what you want to do. That's what people do all the time. I'm so worried what people are going to think. I'm like, yeah, but what are you going to think? What are you going to think about your inaction 10 years from now? What are you going to think about that mean behavior 10 years from now? What are you going to think about failing to be disciplined 10 years from now? Let yourself feel that instead of feeling the worry of a bunch of people in your life who, A, might not matter, B, won't be there in 10 years, C, don't even have the big picture, so their judgment doesn't matter, or D, they're jerks, so what's the big deal? This, if you are allocating, and I, I hope this comes across well because again, it's my job. I know it sounds slipping, but my job is to coach you. I'm a certified high-performance coach. So what we do, we push, we push, we push. And so I'm just here to tell you, if you are in your mid-30s or above, and this is still a major concern, and reject, you know, fear in your life, with all due respect, and I genuinely mean this, but after 30-plus years on the planet, if this is still driving you, I highly encourage you, and I mean this with all seriousness, I highly encourage you to go seek some therapy. I genuinely mean that. I think in our culture, we, we diminish therapy or coaching too much. And I really believe if after 35 years on the planet, you haven't figured out that most people won't reject you, and you're still worried about that, that's you just need some, right? You need some adult conversations and processing. You need to go see a therapist. And I'm not diminishing you because we all need that talk through. I'm a big proponent of therapy for tons of people. It's really important because if you've had a recurring problem and fear, and you have not overcome it after 30 years, it's not likely you're going to get it in the next 10 years. Suddenly, you're not going to walk out one day and go, I finally figured it out. You need some processing time, man. So go process it with somebody. But you should not be concerned about rejection of almost anything. I don't fear rejection of the marketplace. I don't fear rejection of my friends, my family, my spouse, my peers, my partners, because you know what? I believe in my ability to figure things out. Yeah, I screw up, but they're not the people who matter aren't going to wipe you away because of a screw-up. It's just not going to happen, right? So please let this one go. You need to know there's a distinct tie between this one and this one. If you're not getting the momentum you want in life, there's maybe an underlying fear that's tied to the acceptance of the people around you. And once you clear on that, you're like, you're good to go. You are absolutely good to go.
Number three is responsibility. People fear increased responsibility. That's why they don't go for the bigger dreams. If I go for the bigger dream, I'm, I'm gonna have to fire some people, but I'm also probably going to have to hire some people. And now I'm gonna have to manage 10 more people. So they don't do the dream. Oh, you know, if I, if I take on this task, I'll be responsible for more people, or more income, or more bigger goals. You know, it's like Marianne Williamson said, our deepest fear isn't, you know, what's wrong with us, it's the real power that we have. You've got a lot of power, and you're scared of it. You're not stepping into that responsibility because you think, well, you know, who am I, or do I deserve it, or what will they think, or what if I go for it and I can't handle all that new pressure of the next level, and it ruins me? I teach this program, uh, that, you know, we ran for years and years and years in the marketing space called 10x Empire. And I remember the first question I ever got at this event. It is $10,000 per ticket to be at this event. We had a couple hundred people there. And, uh, the woman stands up in the front row. She's there with her husband, their business. And it was the first question I ever got at 10x Empire. And I didn't know how to answer it. Floored me. She stood up. She goes, Brendan, what if you're scared of 10x? I said, what do you mean? She says, well, this 10x thinking, like, if I'm thinking 10 times bigger, she's like, I could barely handle what I have now. So it paralyzed her from even taking one new action forward. Why? Because she thought she couldn't handle it. She couldn't handle the responsibility of the next level. So she stopped. Does it make sense? But here's the thing, the way you handle the next level doesn't have to be the way you handle this one. Like, if you want to handle 10x or 2x or 3x or 1x or a better next week, you can learn to show up in new ways with better routines and better habits and better disciplines to be able to handle it well. It's true. Like for me, managing the size team I manage now, that responsibility, that's probably scared me 10 years ago because 10 years ago, I was ill-equipped to handle that level of responsibility. I didn't do the research. So I feared I couldn't handle the responsibility. But the more you do your homework, and the more you get some momentum from your block time, the more you realize you can actually handle more without falling apart. Because isn't true? Isn't there something you've been fearing handling more of? You know, there's a lot of people who they're just scared for the next level of responsibility. They really, they fear it because they don't know it. And so they've got to deal with all of these issues in order to break through. And sometimes the best way to do any of that is to learn to self-diagnose. Is there, am I, am I any catastrophe thinking going on? Am I scared of rejection? Am I scared of the responsibilities? Then the last one, people need to self-diagnose on is regret. They're fearful if they take a new action, it doesn't work out, they'll regret it for the rest of their lives. Right? You hear people actually say that. I always laugh at that phrase. I'll regret it for the rest of my life. I'm like, what, are you nine years old and think you're gonna only live till you're 10? That's like the most childish thing. I'll regret it for the rest of my life. I'm like, well, hey, you know what? Could you please go learn to meditate or something? Like, regret is not something you should hang on to like that shirt that you got from your high school lover when you were 15 years old, and now it stinks and moths are eating it in your closet. There are some things it's okay to let go, babe. Like, regret. Holding on to regret for the rest of your life. I mean, that's like saying, Brendan, I'm gonna have this car for the rest of my life. I'm like, bet. Good luck with that, homie. Like, you think you're gonna have that car for the rest of your life? Really? That's as dumb as saying, I think I'm gonna have regret for. No one has to. You don't have anything for the rest of your life. You're certainly gonna have, you're not gonna have regret for the rest of your life, not when you're doing positive things, right? Please note, for all teenagers who might be watching this, I am not saying go do something irresponsible because you might regret it. Right? You might regret it. I'm not giving permission here to say, oh, no regrets stick. No, I do. I understand regrets stick. But fearing to take a positive action for your life, for you and your family, because you'll think you'll regret it forever. Like people will say, I don't want to quit my job because I'll regret it. I might regret it forever. I'm like, no, most people don't keep a job forever. So how are you going to regret quitting one forever? You'll figure something out. Like, stop being so scared, right? Maybe you write that down. I know it sounds, you're like, Brendan, this is so basic. Please write it down. Stop being so scared. Like, all of these fears are so easy to flip around, right? Instead of, what if I'm gonna regret it? What if you love it? What if the rest of your life, you love it? What if, oh, I'm scared, I'm scared of that moral responsibility. What if I rise up and I enable others to hire responsibility? What if they don't like me? What if they love you and have sex with you all the time? What if I'm gonna ruin my life? Well, what if instead, you build a life that was actually meant to be yours? Take down the blocks that weren't yours. Knock down the buildings that weren't yours. And what if you actually build the things that were yours? That's how you have to do it. You got to flip these fears on their side. You guys enjoying this? I'm gonna keep going. I got one more thing and then we'll move through some action steps and, uh, uh, get you on your way today. I hope you're enjoying this. I honor you for taking some time to get some high-performance training. That. Let's move into frustrations. Why don't people get momentum? Well, they fail to do things. They fear these things, and they get frustrated with the basics. They get frustrated with other people's doubt. Listen, maybe the most important thing you can write down today that's probably stalling your motivation, your drive, your momentum, it's this one: other's doubt. You get so frustrated that other people don't understand me. They don't understand me. She doesn't get it. They're stupid. They don't know how hard I work. Oh, you complain about all the other people, and that poisons your motivation. Never be frustrated with that. Here's the best thing I ever learned, uh, from one of our high-performance, um, subjects that we studied for, uh, the High Performance Institute. And I'm trying to come up with the right, uh, trying to remember their exact phrase, but it was something to the effect of, um, don't expect that everyone has to understand your dream. Now, notice it doesn't say don't expect that they have to approve. Don't expect they'll have to come along. They don't even have to understand it. Why do you think other people have to get you? I have no expectation that any of you are going to really understand why Brendan is like the way he is. I'm weird as hell. Why? I have no expectation of any person around me understanding my goals, my dreams, my hopes, right? I've seen this so many times in high performers where they're in a continual battle with their spouse because they feel like their spouse should get it, should support, do all these things. And I'm here to tell you, you want to know how to get your spouse to support you on your dreams? Stop expecting that they're supposed to drop everything and believe in you completely and understand every day that you have and coddle you every time you have a bad day and understand all your enemies and help you with every single task. They're a person. Your friends are persons. Your teams are persons. They got their own hopes and dreams, man. Like the greatest way to advance is to release the need to have everyone understand you. Because soon as you can let that go, this one goes out the door. As soon as you can let that go, it becomes about your life again. Like, stop trying to brute force or argue everybody into believing your dreams, your hopes, your ambitions, or even your day. How many of you get frustrated when the kids come home from work and they don't understand the big day you had? How do you get frustrated when the spouse says something and doesn't understand the complex financial difficulties that are going on in your life? My God, how can you not understand? All you have to do is laundry. Ah, like, what, what? Come on, get over that. I don't expect anybody to understand, support, champion anything that I do. In personal development, we call it this crazy phrase that, you know, came out of like the 1800s that people don't like very much called, you know, self-reliance. Like, I'm in charge of me. I don't expect anybody to understand me. I'm weird. I'm from another planet. I'm different. So are you. I don't understand you. We all want to be understood so completely. And because we want to be understood so completely, we stop our very momentum when someone doesn't understand even a piece of us. They don't understand enough, enough of me. I'm going to stop. And that's the mindset that destroys progress. Because I promise you, if you had a habit at the beginning of the year and you lost momentum on it, I bet somewhere along the way, you let somebody else put a kibosh on that habit. Wasn't you. You believed in it. You saw it. You felt it. You knew it was important. But you stopped because of a reaction of another person. Either you felt like they just didn't support you, or they didn't approve, or they didn't get it, right? How many of us had a dream and we went into an office and we said, I got this idea. And someone said, well, that's stupid. And we stopped progress towards the idea. What's stupid is stopping progress towards our own idea because of what other people think. I think it's really important to understand that other people doubting you or not understanding you is normal. And so I'm used to it. When people shoot down my ideas, I'm like, of course they would do that. I don't get mad at them. They're in their own perspective. But if you've stopped any momentum in your life, you need to analyze why. Where did I stop positive momentum in my life because of the needs I wanted from another person? She didn't understand. They didn't approve. So I've stopped my dream. Look, and I said, I share this very, very confident and strong standpoint with you because look, my first book was turned down by 19-plus publishers. I always say that now because I only knew about about 19 of them. And my agent now jokes on my stages when he comes and speaks at, like, you know, Experts Academy, High Performance Academy, he'll make a joke. He's like, well, actually, it was more than Brendan knew. I just didn't think he could have taken another one. And I was like, dude, if I survived 19, I was going to survive 20, right? We all think that people are so much more weak than they really are. And the reality is, I didn't care. I was going to self-publish the book if a major publisher didn't get it. So it's not about other people. Like with motivation to manifest. So this book right here, some of you guys know, I mean, this is an epic, epic, epic story. The development of this book in every single way. My publisher hated it. They turned down the book. They asked for the money. They gave me a bunch of money. I turned the book in. They didn't like it. They didn't get it at all. Totally not. And think about how angry I could get about that. They got, they didn't get it at all. So they asked for the money back. And how easy would have been, like, oh, book must suck, or maybe this project's not right for me. And I could have quit. And instead, I said, I don't really, I'm gonna, I'm gonna keep going ahead. I had to get the money to pay them back. Then I released the book. And because of you all, that Motivation Manifesto did 32 weeks on the New York Times bestseller list. A book that they said was unmarketable. 32 weeks on the New York Times bestseller list. Now, as of today, anyway, the best-selling title of motivation in this century. That's crazy, right? That's insane. The book that was rejected. So just don't worry about other people's doubting. Don't get frustrated with it. You should never, ever complain to other people's doubt. You ever? Because you're an adult, and you should have learned by now. Lots of people are going to question you. Get over it.
Next up, number two, no one wants hardship. If you heard one of our, uh, our, our main themes in some of our training, people get frustrated with hardship. They go, oh, it's too hard, it takes too long, whatever. And we have a saying in my businesses called, honor the struggle. My statement for all of you, and I will say it forever in high-performance training, you must honor the struggle. Honor the hardships of getting better. Do not hate the hardships of getting better. If you constantly apply negative energy to the process, the process will create something negative. If you keep creating positive energy on the process, the process will output something positive. Makes sense, right? It's logical. It's math. It's science, ladies and gentlemen. I think it's science. I never took many science classes, but, you know, I think that's very true. It's this, and this. Enjoy the journey. Honor the difficulties as character challenges. These things are set here to forge a better me, not to diminish me. Different mindset, right? A lot of people go, oh, all these things, look at all these hard things in my life. It must be, and I'm on the wrong track. It must mean I'm not good enough. It must mean I'm never going to get my due. I'm like, oh, all those hard things are placed there for you to get stronger. That's it. You walk into a gym and you look at all those heavy weights. All those heavy weights are the path to strength. Same thing in life. All these heavy things you're dealing with are those heavy things are going to break you or they're going to make you stronger. And it's all up here. Honor the struggle.
Next up, number three, speed. People get so impatient. They get frustrated with the amount of speed that they're having. I'm not achieving my goals enough, Brendan. So I must be on the wrong path. I'm like, what do you mean? Well, you know, I set out four years ago to become a millionaire. And, you know, I'm at $890,000. I'm like, sounds good to me. You know, what's the big deal? Well, I wanted it in four seconds. I'm like, well, you know, okay. You know, but people are so in a hurry that they're not allowing time. Like, if you see the amount of time that I allow into my life, even though, look, I'm very focused on momentum, I'm very focused on progress, but I allow tons of time. I don't get frustrated with speed. You know, if you ask me, my team's sitting here, we've been waiting to, you know, do this office all fancy like this for months, waiting for hiring, you know, 20 new people for months. I'm like, I'll get there. I'm never impatient. I'm like, I will get there because I can see beyond this moment. A little slower than I want right now, that's okay. Because, you know what? I know next year that momentum builds, and the year after that, and the year after that, and the year after. I just know that momentum keeps building, man. So it doesn't bother me, right? When you're on a 10-year plan, one bad week does not slow you down. When you can see the end game, when you're willing to put in the work over and over and over and over again, you won't lose momentum. But people lose momentum because one thing is hard, or they're not getting ahead fast enough. But momentum doesn't have to be a, you know, gigantic rock, you know, just speeding along. Like some days, momentum is you got that thing one more inch, man. Some people don't understand that momentum can be just one more inch. And once you understand that, you're in the game. One more inch, man. Vast momentum sometimes, depending on where you're at, what you're working on, what you're struggling with. You know, I have a friend right now who's dealing with an extraordinary bout of health challenges. And, you know what? Momentum for that person, they don't feel like they've lost it. They've been in the hospital for three months. They don't feel like they've lost momentum. Three months in the hospital. That's a whole different level. And that's why that person's so successful. They're like, yep, it's just, I'm gonna show up every day and do the best I can. And that sometimes momentum, you showing up and doing the best you can day after day after day after day, even if the best you can is diminished because of your health, or you're busy, or something else. Those things add up. They become, I mean, it's that snowball effect, right? Or that compound effect that just goes and goes and goes and grows and grows and grows from little momentum. So stop thinking momentum is a million dollars after two days, right? Stop thinking so huge. Sometimes it's like one inch at a time. And last piece for this model, anyway, is this one: discipline. People get frustrated because they're not disciplined enough. So they hate on themselves. And the next morning, they wake up and they unconsciously don't like themselves because they beat themselves up so much. They think, I'm not disciplined. I know some of you came here because it's like, hey, look, we're talking about habits and why it's so hard to maintain them. This is why it's so hard to maintain good habits. Think about any habit you set at the beginning of the year. The reason you're not sticking at it is on this page, I promise you. If you set a new goal or a new habit or new discipline at the beginning of this year, it's on here. And one of the reasons you might not be keeping momentum as much as you want is this guy. You beat yourself up. You go, I'm so frustrated. I don't have more discipline. So I guess I won't get any more discipline. It's funny, sometimes the things that we accuse ourselves of stop us from having those very things. I should be more confident. I hate myself. Well, how are you going to get more confident if you keep hating yourself for not being confident? Like, it's just, just this horrible mindset that they get stuck in like a merry-go-round of stupidity. You know, it's like, you got to be careful there. It's, look, if you don't have more discipline, you can't get frustrated with yourself. What you need to do is get clear, set that block time, set up those conditions that you maintain it. I'm going to talk about exactly how to do that in this next section. So I hope that you've enjoyed this first section on a mindset for momentum. But I want to talk about that second bullet I promised you guys. What do you do? We have a big idea, and you want to get massive momentum towards it, and how do you maintain the discipline? So this will be a good transition point. And that is going to be this training that I'd like to cover with you right now on how do you develop an action mindset and maintain those habits. So let's say you had a big dream. And what I like to do in your journal right now is write down what is that big dream? Like, what's the biggest goal that you set this year? Like the biggest one. Let's write that down. And then maybe, because we're all here, type it down in the chat. Roll down below. What's your crazy idea? Like, what's a crazy idea or crazy goal or crazy thing you would like to do? High-performance training, action mindset. This is important. How do you develop the action mindset? But actually also here, I should just add this in here. How do you actually get the action mindset and then make it a discipline? This here it is. First thing. So remember, you got a big new idea for the year. You're really super stoked. You can't wait to do it. Okay, big new idea for the new year. What are you going to do? Okay, big new idea for the new year. You want to be action. You want discipline. You want to make it happen. First thing you've got to adopt. Well, there it goes. Is your, let's try this. Your 30-minute daily block. People tell me all the time, I got this dream or this goal. I'm like, great. What 30-minute period of day are you gonna work on it today? What do you mean? Well, you said you have a big goal, right? Yeah. Big idea, right? Yeah. Okay, show me when's the third 30-minute block that that thing gets today? It's a new idea, you say, right? Yeah. Okay, where is it? Is it 1:30 to 2? Is it 4 to 4:30? Is he gonna check it at 5 right after work till 5:30? Then get on the commute a little later. Like, when? New ideas must have new blocks of time. Write it down. New ideas must have new blocks of time. If you got a new idea, someday, someday, a big dream, and it doesn't land in the calendar, at least listen. Daily 30-minute daily block of time. Of course, you're not going to get momentum. It's got to be. Look, if you won't give it something, 30 minutes a day, it don't matter to you. Just be honest. Like any good parent will tell you this, like if you don't spend 30 minutes with your kids a day, I mean, good luck in having that connection. Good luck in forging that future. Good luck in helping that person feel loved and supported. I mean, if something is important to you, you give it time. Is it true? So if this idea is important to you, immediately mindset, this is what I immediately do. 30 minutes. And if it's a completely new idea, it's got to get at least 30 minutes if I want it to actually come true. And it's important from the time I set the idea, the next day it gets 30 minutes. Big new idea must do it. If it's important to me, the next day I get 30 minutes. Not four years from now, like right now. I have a big partnership I'm working on. Like it completely came into my life, totally interrupted my life. I don't have any time. But it's important. I found 30 more minutes a day, right? 30 more minutes is easy to find for everybody. People don't think they can. It's possible. I just had a friend and I get in a huge argument over lunch about this. Not everybody can find 30 minutes. And I'm like, who can't find 30 minutes more a day? Like, show me who was a little more disciplined, a little more planning and preparation. Who can't find 30 more minutes a day? Well, I, you know, I'm busy and I have all these things and you'd understand. I'm like, okay, walk me through your day. Boy, I have to get up. I gotta get everything, you know, get the kids ready for work. I gotta get in the car. I gotta commute. That commute's an hour every single day. I can't take away that. I got to do this and this and this. And I'm like, well, what if you didn't drive? What do you mean? Well, what if you didn't drive the car so that your focus and attention could be doing something else? Well, I gotta do the commute. I don't know. Um, I've noticed that a lot of cars have a passenger seat, and some of them even have a back seat. And if you sit in one of those, you don't have to do this. And I just got you an hour a day. So many people are so, they believe so deeply that they are managing their time so great. I'm like, no, most people have so much free time they have no idea. It's that they are distracted and unprepared or addicted to consuming that they're losing little, little pieces. And especially here in the United States, you guys have heard me rail on this. The average American, four hours of television a day. Don't tell me you don't have 30 minutes a day. I don't know anyone who can't find 30 more minutes a day for a great new idea that can change their life. You got a new idea, it can change your life. Find your 30 minutes every single day.
Number two, remember the first output rule. First output rule says this. If you've got a big new dream, big new goal, big new idea, don't think that you have to do what we've all been taught, which is begin with the end in mind. Because sometimes you don't know what the end in mind is, but you know the first step. So what I tell people is like, I got a big new idea. I go, great. What's the first output that you would have to create on that immediately? Was like, the first output that would start you on the path. Um, I, I don't know. Okay, figure that out. First step, first output, right? First step is not the research. What's the first output? Let me give an example. When I began my career, I said, one day I'm gonna do video courses. And in mind, I'm gonna do all my online courses. That was the big idea. I'm gonna do online courses. Guess what I didn't do? I didn't say, well, I better figure out the whole curriculum for all the courses for the rest of my life. Begin with the end in mind. Didn't do that. I said, what's the first step that would allow me to start doing that? Okay, first step, get in front of a camera, teach, and post it on the internet. That's the first output. One teaching video on the internet. So I went and I got my stupid little at the time flip video camera. Some of you guys know about those. Got a flip video camera. I duct-taped it to a box. I put on my cleanest shirt at the time. And I stared at the camera and I taught. And I pulled off the flip video camera. And I spent four hours uploading it on the internet. You remember that? Probably not. But you remember that? Yeah, upload, upload, upload, upload. And then it wouldn't play because it was, wouldn't stream fast enough. But I spent the time. The first output to me building an online course, the empire one video. What's your first output? Do that now. That's how you may maintain momentum. The reason people don't stick to their habits is because they're waiting to create the output someday. I'm like, what's the first output? Do it. That's the thing to work on right now. When you got that 30-minute daily block, work towards that first output. Because you get the first output, you got real momentum. You get the first output, your dream, your idea is realized. It's tangible. It's like, oh, I did that thing. Your body likes it. Your brain goes, oh, I like that. Dopamine, serotonin. Good job, Brendan. Let's go again. First output. If you don't know the first output of what you have to create, you don't even have a dream. You got, you got, you don't even have a fully thought-out idea. First output. Make it. Do it. Create it. Post it. Do the thing. That's it. I want to write a book, Brendan, but I don't know what the whole book is. I'm like, great. First output. First page. Write it. What do you mean? I don't know what the book is. Write the first page. But I don't know what the book is. Write the first page. First output would be the first page of the book, right? Write the first page. But I don't know what the five chapters are. I don't write the first page. See, you don't have to know the whole picture. First step. Do the first output. Because you get that first page done, you probably get that next page done. You probably get the next page done. And you'll start getting clarity of the project. A lot of the creativity of life comes in motion, not beginning in speculation. Oh, that's good, right? We should write that one down. Almost rhymed. Yeah, okay.
Next up, number C, 90-day challenge. I can't believe how many people have a big dream or big goal and they don't set up their own 90-day challenge. Like, okay, what's your first output? Good job. Appreciate you. But you got 30 minutes every single day in 90 days. Where are we? 90 days, three months. Let's go. Because see, what most people are, they're scared to commit to the big idea and dream. And I go, oh, don't commit the first big idea dream, not for life. Just like you won't ruin your life forever. Don't commit to your new idea or dream forever. I need 90 days. Give me 90 days, man. Commit to that thing, 90 days, and get at it for 90 days. Reevaluate after 90 days where you're at. Don't think most people don't take an action because they think, well, I'll have to do this action forever. Just like they worry, I'll be ruined forever. There's no forever. There just isn't. It's just now. None of us are guaranteed anything. So if what we have is right this moment, and we're looking towards the future, and we're working towards that, good job. Went in 90 days. Where are you? That's it. What'd you do in 90 days? Did you lose five pounds? Great. You don't have to say, I'm going to be completely life transformed. I'm gonna have six-pack abs and still drink piña coladas on the beach with 40 people in bikinis around. No, no, no, no, no, dude. Lose five pounds. You got 90 days. Go. Like, just set the 90-day challenge for yourself and get it. That. And then worry about the next series of goals after that. So if you've got a big idea or a dream, and you're really committed to it, commit to a 90-day challenge. And what does that mean for you specifically? What's going to happen at the end of 90 days? How you think, how you feel, how you'll move, what you achieve, what outputs are created? Get really clear on those types of things. You'll be so happy you did. Without these things, there is no idea into action. There is no momentum. That's why you didn't stick to your habit because you didn't give it 30 minutes a day. You didn't stick to your habit because you didn't even know what you were supposed to do. You didn't stick to your habit because you didn't at least set a time period that was realistic for yourself, that was doable. You could go, I know so many people said a New Year's resolution and never say, well, what happens at the end of March 31st? January 1st, 90 days out. Great. Where am I on March 31st? They don't even think about that. And so they struggle. They got big ideas and dreams and no action plan over a 90-day period. Please.
Okay, D, you gotta have your drop list. There is no new idea in your life without a drop list of things to stop doing. A drop list. I'm dropping these things. I'm not doing these things. I'm saying no to these things. I'm getting this off the agenda. I'm letting that responsibility go. It's the things you aren't going to do that help you do the things that you are going to do. So you gotta spring clean a little bit. If you got new dreams in your life, spring clean. What are you going to stop doing? Right? I'm very, very disciplined about this for me personally. I have one of my own personal practices on the first of every month. I make my drop list. Every month, not once a year, every month. I go, okay, this month, what do I need to drop? Because inevitably, I, you know, I'm moving so fast, I pick up new things. I'm doing all the time, right? Some new idea, new dream, new thought, because I'm trying to innovate, I'm trying to be out front, I'm trying to lead them, I'm trying to change things. And then what ends up happening is I, throughout the month, other people also do. What other people give you responsibilities, give you ideas, give you programs. They're adding on to your plate all month long. You're collecting a bigger and bigger plate. At the end of each month, if you just maintain that big plate, in the next month, more people add more stuff to your to-do list, more your plate. By the end of 12 months, you are carrying The Last Supper. Like you can't do that. Was that a bad joke? Kind of worked, sort of. Not a good metaphor. Kind of worked. You're carrying so much that it is impossible to maintain. You got to drop, drop, drop, drop. Like every now, I'm rapping. The white rapper. We just put a beat to that piece. Okay, I'm getting a little punch drunk. I think it's really important that every single month we're dropping activities that we picked up along the way, right? I got some new idea, I'm gonna do that. I gotta let it go. Even some goals, right? Some, some months I start, I go, okay, well, this month I'm gonna do these five new things. And at the end of that month, I realize, you know what? I'm not going to maintain five. I'm gonna drop two of them. I'll stick with three. But I can't do all five. That's a drop list. Without a drop list, I have no idea how you can keep adding new things. Makes sense? Some of the biggest breakthroughs in our life is when we just stop doing the things that we know aren't right for us.
Next up, big important one. The Friday friend status call. Everything that we know from goal setting comes back to sociology. If you don't have someone you're doing something with actively, if you don't have an accountability partner, you don't have a coach, you don't have a friend you go to lunch with or someone you talk it through, then the odds of that happening for you are so low. Because, you know what? We're social beings. We need processing time with other people. And the more processing time we have, usually the more progress we get, right? That's why therapy is so powerful in unlocking people, or coaching so powerful in unlocking people. It's like, oh, I'm processing. Oh, I'm getting distinction. I'm getting more progress. You need that Friday friend status call. If you got a big new goal or dream, all I want you to do every Friday at the end of the day, literally five-minute, 10-minute, 15, 30-minute call, whatever it is, pick it up, call your friend and say, I did this this week, struggled with this, this worked, that went well. You now go, how did you do? And just, you got one person in your life every week you're talking about momentum with. I don't care if it's your mom. I don't. I prefer this as a human, so not the cat, but a human that you every single week you talk through things with. Like, where are you? Oh, you. I don't care if it's a librarian. I don't care if it's your social worker. I don't care if it's your brother. I don't care who it is. Gonna be the stranger across the street. Don't talk to strangers if you're PG-13. But everybody else, have that conversation. And just on a Friday, go, hey man, this is where I'm at. Because if you won't do that, I promise, if you don't socialize your learning, you will not achieve your dreams. You must socialize. What am I learning? Where am I at? How's it going? What am I struggling with? You got to ask for help. But you need a consistent basis. Big dreams require weekly check-ins. Write it down. Big dreams require weekly check-ins. So who's going to be your weekly check-in accountability coach, friend, mentor, who every week check in? And if you're like, well, I don't know anybody, everybody hates me. You know what? Go on your Facebook page every Friday at five and go, this is what I learned this week. This is what I tried. What did you guys try? And all the people who make fun of you, delete them. And everybody else say, good for you. So easy. Life's very simple.
Next, create motivation triggers. When I walked in this door today, it's the same when I walk in the doors of my conference rooms at, um, when I'm doing my seminars. That when I usually, my doorway trigger, meaning that's what a motivation trigger is. I, I, a trigger is something physical or tangible happens, and you attach either a statement or an action to it. Okay, trigger is something tangible that you say or do when something else happens. So when I walk through a door, and that's every door of my life, I walk through a door, my mind almost always says, because I'm just conditioned it over and over and over doing this, I walk through the door, my mind says, I am a happy man entering this space, ready to serve. I'm a happy man entering this space, ready to serve. It's been since I was like 20 years old. One, because I always want to remind myself I'm happy. I have so much to be grateful for. So do you. So how are you reminding yourself that you're grateful? That you're happy? That you're good? And then I remind myself, I'm entering the space ready to serve. Not hoping to serve, not maybe one day I'll deserve to serve, I'm ready right now. Whatever I know, I believe in my ability to figure things out. I'm ready to serve now. I don't need permission. I don't need more money. I don't need more team. I'm ready to, whatever, whatever I got, I'm ready. Let's go. I don't need new things, more things, better things, tons of things. I'm ready to serve right now. Let's go. I'm not ever waiting to provide service to the world, ever. You don't have to have the big stuff, the fancy stuff, just go. I didn't have big fancy cameras and lights and fancy big flip charts when I started this. It was me in a really dirty shirt with the thing, the buttons too hung open, like, you know, it's like it was so nasty and gnarly and bad. It was awesome. And I was ready to serve. You don't have to have everything. I was watching this documentary recently on, I mean, uh, Usain Bolt, one of the greatest, well, he is the greatest sprinter of all time, right? And you see the scene of him, and he is doing sprints in a field, uh, with like this sort of crappy little belt tied around his waist, tied to a chain, tied to, you know, um, we would call it a weight sled, but you could barely call it that, a little metal sled where you put on.
like you know weights like a 45 pound weight from it like lifting and it's like so he would sprint with this crappy little things. When you go to the NFL or I work with my, you know, my major teams, they usually got they got the fancy sleds, these longer sleds that glide. When you take off, that release proportionate amount of tension along with the weight as you speed up, like very fancy contraptions.
Now, this dude, the best ever, is down in Jamaica in a hot, crappy field with this huge belt on with like one coach, not 12 coaches, one coach standing there next to him. He ties this thing and when he takes off, this thing is bouncing along behind him. It's like the just like you're like, and he's the world's best because he's not waiting to have everything to train. He's training. I'm not waiting to have everything to serve. I'm serving so many of my people.
Well, one day when I have a following, I'll post some stuff. I'm gonna start posting stuff now. One day when I'm ready, I'll put myself. No, there is no one day to be ready. You're ready now. Go. It is a mindset you must have. You're ready to go.
So that's one of my triggers. Walk through a door, I'm entering the space as a happy man, ready to serve. Let's go. That's just one, one trigger I have. All sorts of other triggers. I have different doorway triggers. When I walk in my house, I say something a little different to myself than when I walk to my office. But other triggers I have, when a door closes in a car, every time a door closes in a car, I say something else to myself.
When I walk into my office, I take a first action that triggers momentum for me. Like, you need to have first actions or space triggers that help you stay your best. They're ultimately all geared towards one thing. How can you remind yourself to be at your best? And how do you use physical objects, time periods, um, situations to get yourself there? That's the question. That's your job.
These are motivation triggers because if you're not triggering yourself, the world's doing it for you. And if the world's doing it, you know what the world's going to trigger you towards? Angst, outrage, distraction, consumption. It's not going to trigger you towards you being your best self.
So if you didn't maintain your habits this year, go on my YouTube channel and and type in the word, you know, the type in the power of habits and you'll see a video that will teach you how to set some more of those examples. Right, if you look in a mirror, you should have a mirror trigger. See your reflection of yourself, say something to yourself. I know that sounds like just like positive thinking kind of stuff. And you know what? It is. Because what's the alternative? Stupid thinking, negative thinking, scarcity thinking. You need to have a little bit more triggers set up to make you work. And sometimes if it's not just you, get somebody else to do it. Get a coach to do it, a mentor to do it, a friend to do it. But you need to be triggered to be your best.
How are you currently triggering yourself to be your best? Many of you know you've been with me for years. Uh, you know, we kind of now everybody does it, but we're the first one to do it. When the smartphone came out and the first alarm was available to be set, a label, I created this training and put it out about saying, hey, use this alarm label on your phone to send yourself reminders to tell you to be awesome. Put your three words in here that pop up and remind you who to be. Use this as a trigger to be your best instead of as a box of consumption because this can be a weapon for good or a weapon that takes you into distraction. But it's up to you. Just like the rest of life, self-reliance, it's up to you.
Okay, my friends, I've been rambling and bambling. I know I'm out of time. I hope that you've enjoyed this high performance training. And I hope that no matter what, you took some notes today. You got some fire in the belly today. You're ready to set up some new routines, some new habits, because along the way, you can do great things. I promise.
One extra thing for you. And that is when we get through all of this thinking and all the self-reliance, how do you get other people to support you? Here's how you get other people to support you. One, you begin that high performance journey with them. Like they sh if you wanted someone to support you in your life, why weren't they watching this with you? Did you invite them? Number two, do you have a weekly review session with the person you want you to support? Are you talking through what worked and what didn't work with someone you want to support you? Number three, remember, no one has to understand you and support you completely. That's not their role. They have their lives too. It's okay if not everyone understands you. Number four, the best way to get anybody in the world to support you is do what we talked about on the very first framework, momentum. You get more believers as you get more momentum.
If you got a doubter in your life, who's important, your husband, your spouse, your partner, somebody who you need to believe in, don't try to convince them with ideas. Don't matter logically argue them off defense. The way you get people to support you is you get momentum. When they see it, they start to believe it. You win the world not through luck or argumentation. You win the world through demonstration. Demonstrate the best of who you are every single day. And soon all the doubters start believing and following along. And those who don't, don't matter. Let them have their own lives. Not everyone has to champion you. I don't count on everybody becoming my students or reading my books or going through my courses or coming by seminars. It's cool. The ones who are ready for that level of advancement, they are the ones who aren't. That's not it. Maybe it's not me because clearly I have problems with my jokes today. But you know what? We all got our own style. And I hope that you being here is still at this moment, you found something today that will serve you.
Please do me a favor. Go out there every single day of your life. Know that you can perform at your best if you set yourself up that way. And as always, make sure you live each day fully, you love openly, and you make your difference right now.
Hey, it's Brenda. I just want to thank you for watching my channel. There's so many other teachings and trainings on this channel. So please enjoy. Thanks for being here. Also, for those who want to go to another level, I have an upcoming certified high performance coach certification week. This is where I teach you and certify you to become a world-class life coach. We call them certified high performance coaches. You can click the link in the description right now to apply and learn about our upcoming certification week. If you want to go to another level as a life coach and you want me to certify you and help you, make sure you click that link and take advantage of it right now. Enrollment is open today.