“He’s a Skyscraper 🏙 ?” Jaw dropping IG Live ©

[Music] 37. All right, so what are we talking about? I mentioned a lot. We talked about it's over after 45. Talking about they feel comfortable discussing sexuality, or what do you want to talk about? I want to talk about relationships and kind of like dating because I kind of suck at it. Um, I'm not the best. Okay, I've been in a long-term relationship. Um, you've been in a long-term relationship? Yes. The longest I was in was 13 years. And how did you, again, 37, 13 years? Were you married? No. Any children? No. Wait, the long-distance relationship? You guys living in the same city? No, it wasn't a long-distance relationship. We were actually living together. Okay. Why didn't you get married? I don't think he was ready. Um, I'm gonna say that. I'm sorry, I just don't want this to turn off. I don't think he was ready, to be honest with you. And that's the reason why I left the relationship because I felt like he was just into being young, shopping, and clubbing. Something more serious. Same age. You don't think he was ready? And what year did you discover that he wasn't ready? Well, I mean, after 13 years. And there's no problem, but I'm trying to figure out in what year did you come to the realization that he wasn't right? I would say maybe 10 years into the relationship. You know how crazy that sounds? It does. I mean, I was in a relationship very young. I was, I was in a relationship from the age of 17. So, but you weren't in a marriage, right? Why? Okay, you're gonna, if you want to date, you're gonna, you got, you're late. It's gonna have to get comfortable answering questions about your poor work history. Okay, I'm open to that. I'm saying this because if you want to get a job, a wife is a driver. So you're going to go sit down with a prospective employer. You got questions for him, you got standards for him. He's gonna ask you, why were you with somebody for 13 years and you said he wasn't ready? Were you ready? Yeah, definitely. I was ready. I would say after the 10-year mark because I was young, you know, I was more focused on my career, as I still am today. Um, I realized that I loved him. I was in love and I was ready to move forward. Say that again. Where did you go to college? No, I didn't go to college, actually. And then what's your career? I process payroll for a living. That's not a career. It's not a career. It's a job. I find it to be a career. I mean, it pays well. I've been going for it. Oh, yeah, that's a job. I'll take that. I'll take that. Yeah, career is something that has upward mobility and usually requires secondary education. Well, my career does, uh, require secondary, uh, you can call it, you can call hearing. You see why, why are things like this important? Because women aggrandize things that are normal. My mother worked in a factory. That wasn't a career. She made more money than a lot of people who had careers, but it wasn't a career.

[Music] So when you say I'm focused on my career, I want to hear attorney, position, something where I want to hear things that require focus. Well, payroll does require focus. No, ma'am. Payroll man does not require. Okay. If you don't want to look. Are there other women who do payroll who are married? Of course. Everyone is. See, if you were a brain surgeon, a cardiac surgeon, or an oncologist, or neonatal surgeon, somebody who worked long hours, then you could talk about your career being first because you have the money, the prestige, and the social gravitas. You got, you got an hourly job that you have to take some courses for, but it's just a job. Okay. So it's nothing to put marriage aside for. That's interesting. Well, if it's not, then why are women who were payroll, what's your proper title? Say it again. What's your proper title? Payroll officer. Payroll officer. Then why are female payroll officers married? Well, a lot of women that I've worked with have met their husbands in college and then they just pursue. Yeah. Why are they married? I mean, every woman wants to be married. Who wouldn't want to commit? Me too. Huh? You could be too if I found the right man that was respectful. No, no, no, ma'am. You're not a wife. Why? Why do you say that? Well, because you were with somebody for 13 years, it didn't require marriage. That's why. So you think a woman should require marriage? I think wives require marriage. And how will she require it? I would love to hear that from you. What if she doesn't? [ __ ] live because she doesn't. She doesn't kick it with somebody for 13 weeks, let alone 13 years, and live with a man without y'all was shacking up, right? Yes. You were, you were pretending that you were playing husband and wife, but you didn't get the, you didn't get the ring, you didn't get the social credit. There was a ring, but I, I didn't really feel like the ring was something that I could mention because if your mom buys the ring for you and you give it to me, that doesn't count, right? Well, what kind of woman would be with a man whose mama got to buy her a ring? Well, she bought the ring because she got kind of tired of it. What kind of woman would be with the man whose mama buys a ring? Well, that's why I'm not with him, right? Because that's actually what made me leave him. The fact that his mama will get involved. But if a higher level man, a husband, would not accept a woman who would accept a man whose mama had to buy a ring. So you're not a wife? I wouldn't say that. No. Not looking for that. You can't just say that over that situation. Yes, I can. Oh, man, man, man. Trust me, everything about you screams not a wife. Oh my god. Come on, Kevin. Ma'am, you lived with somebody for 13 years. I sent him this video. Hopefully, he's watching so he can be embarrassing himself as well. I'm not a wife because I was with someone for 13 years and didn't require to be married. Well, that's one thing. Well, you're not a wife. That's just an outcome of it. Were you raised to be your wife? Well, yeah, actually. I have a mother, father that were married. I was raised with a mother, father. No, no, no, no, no. Yes. Well, you raped. No, your mother and father were married. Were you raised to be a wife? I believe I was raised to be. Okay. If you were raised to be a wife, then how is it that you could accept a man who did not want to marry you? How could you move into a man's house if you didn't have his last name? It was actually my apartment. I don't care. How could you accept women who are wives don't go away with a man who doesn't change their last name and put a ring on it? I can agree to that. And that's what a part of my growth was to realize that, to be honest with you. But if you were raised to be a wife, there wouldn't be any growth necessary. Well, you know what it is? I have to be honest. I'm an enabler. You know, I, I actually didn't take my concerns and what I wanted in life and put that as a priority. And it takes time sometimes for someone. No, it doesn't. No, it does. No, no, no, no, no, no. You were raised to be a single modern woman. You were based to be a worker. I mean, you picked the man who was beneath you. He moved into your house. Two thousand years ago, would that work? No. Then why does it work today? Because you got a payroll clerk job. Payroll officer's job. Wow. That's a fair question. You're right. I, I can't even go against. But sure, absolutely right. So why didn't you guys have kids? Well, I don't want to have kids unless I'm married. And if you don't want to marry me, why would I have a child? So why are you laying up having sex with this man for 13 years in your house? I had a sexual appetite that I wanted to please with a lower level man. Correct. Could you get it? Could you get a higher level one, though? Of course. Absolutely. Could you get a higher level man to do more than just have sex with you? Yes. You can get a higher level man to marry. Of course. I'm just not open to relationships because I'm afraid. I feel like sometimes my. Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop. Do you listen to the [ __ ] that's coming out of your mouth? Because it should make your breath. You actually said you sat here and said that you could get a higher level man. You could get a higher level man to have more than sex with you. You get a higher level man to actually marry you. So you're trying to tell us that you openly accepted a lower level man for what reason? I mean, if what you say is true, then why would you accept the lower level man? You get a higher level man to marry you. I wasn't thinking that way when I was a young girl, but I'm a grown woman now. And what makes you think you can get a high level man? What higher level man is, what a higher level man is actively vetting you to become his wife? I have many, actually. I have money. Y'all hear this [ __ ]? Yeah. This is, this is, this is the delusion. What's the delusion? What makes a delusion, though? You have many. Me, I'll tell you. You say you have many high-level men vetting you right now to be their wife? Yeah. Most women, okay. How many? I'm gonna say about three. How old is the oldest? 45. How old is the youngest? He's about 26. He's not, he's not a higher level man. Well, I mean, no, there's no, there's no, no, no, no, no. See, guys look at the hearts. Graduated college. 45. How much does a 45-year-old make? About 150,000. What does he do for a living? He's a skyscraper. Say again. Oh, man. Say again. He does what I say. He's a skyscraper. That's what I said. What does that mean? Well, let's just simplify it. He, um, he puts elevators into buildings. You know, a skyscraper is a building. Well, that's the work he does, sir. That's what he considers himself. That's the job title that he gave, and that's what I'm giving you. How long have you been seeing this man? Um, about six months. How many children has he had? Two. Has he been married before? No, but he has two kids. How many baby mamas? All right, right. So he's a skyscraper, two kids or two different women, and you're in New York? Yeah. [ __ ] making 150. So that's roughly 75,000 anywhere else. And then a 26-year-old went to college. What does he do for a living? Well, he joined, um, NYPD. So he's actually in classes for that now, which isn't a lot of money because they make probably about 45 a year. Then how are you calling him a higher level man? Well, I go with the intelligence and how you treat me. I'm not gonna go by your salary because at the end of the day, I don't give a [ __ ] what you go by. That's not what the world goes by. I'm listening to you because I got on here to get some knowledge from you. You know, don't listen to what you got to say. Well, what we gotta do is look at your life. You, you make up your own definitions. Yeah, you make up your own rules. You call [ __ ] what you want them to. And, uh, my question is, when you retire at 65, when you retire, retirement age, 65, are you gonna have your 1.1, your 2.4 million dollars you're gonna need there between 65 and 85? No. Okay. And say yes, then who's gonna pay for you? Well, I mean, I have goals in life that I'm working. Man, you're 37. Who's gonna pay for you? I ask you, when you get to be 65 and life is on the way, being over there, there's no more goals in life. You're, you're, you're a senior citizen. Who's gonna pay for you? No husband, no kids. Who's gonna pay? Well, it's whatever I have at that point, what I've done. And when the money runs out, right? The money runs out. And you can't pay your rent. What happens? I don't think it's gonna get to that level. Oh, yeah, it will. Yes, it will. See, that's why I asked you, you're gonna need your 2.4 million because you're gonna have to live for 20 years. You're gonna have to pay your rent. You've got to pay your utilities, groceries, elder care. Money runs out. If you don't have enough money and it runs out, that means you can't pay something. Your biggest bill is your rent. When you can't pay your rent, what happens? When anyone can't pay their rent, what happens? They get evicted, right? Then where do you go? I don't see my life like that. I don't give a [ __ ] where do you go if you get evicted? I mean, to the streets, to shelters, right? Thank you. And see, this is why none of these women foresee being evicted on the street. They're not gonna have the money because if you had a career, you should be able to take care of yourself. Because if you chose to be unmarried, that means you chose to take on the financial responsibilities by yourself. That means you got to pay for it. And if a man was in your position and couldn't pay for it, where would he end up? The same place I'll end up, right on the streets. But you, but why don't men understand this? And y'all think y'all, who you think so? You can't honestly. So let's just say in my scenario, you don't have the money. Let's just say you have half the money. Let's just say you got 1.2 million, which we know that's not true. Let's just say you got it. You can't work anymore. Okay. Where do you think it's going to come from? The money, the retirement plans are for. Ma'am, I don't care what you call it. It totals up to a certain amount of money, right? If you got half of what you need, call it whatever you want to. Where is the other part going to come from? See, I'm not laughing. I'm just, I'm talking to a 40-year-old woman. And y'all are chuckling like this is a game. It's not a game. But you're, but you're, yeah, it is. I mean, you'll be eating cat food, dog food, you'll be homeless. That's you. You're in New York City. It's called the street. This world is not set up for average earning payroll officer women to live by themselves. A little company. So I don't care. Do you make more than six figures? No. Do you make more than 90,000? Yes. Less than 100? No. You make more than 90,000 a year? Yes, I do. Less than 100? No, I do not. Then you make six figures. My love. I make 150,000. This woman, I just asked, you make six figures. She said no. You, you can, you can get. I just, we all be on Instagram and I don't know who's watching to be knowing my salary. Somebody adjusted. I used to live in New York City and I know about your costs. I'm in New York City. Every month, how much is your rent? Rent is around $3,000 a month. That's $36,000 a year. So you can make 150, you still ain't gonna have enough money to live. You pay, you pay federal tax, state tax, city tax. You're not talking to somebody who don't know what they're talking about. I respect what you're saying. Being respected or not, man, but the bottom line is, you are choosing to be an unmarried woman out here. You better be able to pay for yourself between 65 and 85 because the government ain't doing it. There won't be social security. Whatever you make, whatever you invest is what you got to live on. And if you run out of money, just like if we run out of money, you will be on the street. No, I haven't resources. I highly doubt that. Exactly. They always think somebody. This is what, this is why I always think somebody else is going to pay for it. A lot of resources, but the one resource you don't have is a husband and family. And that's my ultimate point. You live with a man for 13 years and wasted 13 years of building a network and a family and the security and the social safety net. So now you got to talk this [ __ ] like you got a career and you're making money. You got all these resources. And just to check with a payroll officer job. Congratulations. I mean, I will congratulate myself because actually, of course, she will. Of course, you will. They always, they always congratulate themselves because, because it's, because, man, it ain't gonna work. Congratulate yourself if you know you're gonna have your retirement money. You're at 65. Until then, there is nothing to be congratulated on. But see, this is what happens when we give eighth place trophies and we tell and we tell everybody that they're a winner and everybody, there's a queen. We tell women they don't matter and they think that they won't be the one, they can't comprehend of a world to where they're going to lose. Man, every day I talk to women in your position. Right? I don't think it's funny because I listen to women like yourself and y'all don't understand how dire of a situation you're in. That's how blind y'all are. I'm not blind and I'm not dumb and I'm not stupid. I do have things on the table that I know I'm gonna be okay. Investments. Do you? So things on the table. You come from money? No, but I'm gonna have a nice big check when I'm done with my lawsuit. So I'm okay. Oh, a lawsuit? Yes, absolutely. So I'm okay. Yeah, I have my own organization. I do contracts on the side. So I am worth it. Even worth it. Hustle and flow. I'm gonna be all right. Okay. They always got some, some otherworldly plan. And understand the thing that works is marry a man, join families, build a network, build a family unit, have backup, share expenses. But no, this is why I don't have any sympathy for modern women. You want it this way, enjoy. So you got to get out and have lawsuits and safety. Okay, knock yourself out. Ah, okay. Now whenever I ask, are you gonna have your money to return? The answer's always no. But then the conversation goes on. Then what? Then all of a sudden they got all these lawsuits and everything else. Well, what happened? Are you, you need to bounce back on, man. Um, look, ladies, why, why, why is it so, so many women walk around like life is a joke? I'm a joke. It's not a joke. It's not a joke. It's not a game. Why are you so egotistical? Because your mama look at you. You are. That's your mama. You. If you want to talk [ __ ] to me, get your big ass on camera first. That's why you're gonna, you're gonna step to me to talk [ __ ]. Uh, get on camera first. Oh, no. Why are you so egotistical? [Music] Why are you so egotistical? Come on, come on, Miss Renee. Jump your ass back on here if you want to talk to me. Don't hide off camera though. If you want to talk to me, get on camera. Don't get off camera and then act, think you're gonna say some [ __ ] like that. Now you want to get on camera and bring the smoke? Bring it. I'll even invite you. But I'm gonna tell you right now, you get on here acting a fool, it's gonna be a bad day for you. See, I got a good memory. I got a good memory. Yeah, I got a good memory. Come on. Mm-hmm. Right. Ding dong. [Music] Ding dong. Doorbell, doorbell. Oh, she didn't want to get back on. No, don't, don't be in the, don't, don't be in the doctor. Oh, yes, yes. You want to talk? Oh, yes, I do. How old are you? Mike, I am 40. Okay. First of all, you're 40. Are you married? Are you single? I get married. I'm married. Say again. You broke up. Define egotistical. Define egotistical. You. No, no. Divine egotistical. You can't say me. You, you use the word. Now, please define it for the audience. When I, when I bring up the word egotistical, your face is right next to it. Like, okay. So look, I'm gonna, I'm gonna. No, no. See, this is how this, this is what's gonna come off as a man. So here's what you, this is what's gonna happen, chick. Either we're gonna do it my way. I'm trying to give you an opportunity. But if you want to go that way because you don't, because you're not talking. So you can do it right. You can either, you can either. See, this is when these women who just like to talk. So you can either. No answer. Yeah. Yep. Gave it an opportunity. Feel sorry for your husband. See, what you do is you call women and their [ __ ] and what's the first thing to come out of their mouth? Shame, insults, guilt, the need to be right. Sign language. There you go. Bring your back home. Give you an opportunity to sit down and have a conversation. But see, you, or not you, you throw that [ __ ] out there. But they can't stand on it. So we don't need you for that. We've heard this [ __ ] enough of our lives. She wouldn't expect me to ask her to define the word now. Oh, they want me to actually. He actually wants me to know what I'm talking about. Oh, zippy to do that. No, man, you're gonna have to stand on what, on what you say. Stand on your disrespect. But at least be able to define it. You're gonna have to do better than that. Gonna have to do better than. Don't you understand? You got a 40-year-old woman who could not even get through three sentences of a conversation. When I say three sentences, three paragraphs in the conversation. But she did. Level. Oh, hello. Hi, Kevin. How are you? I am well. How old are you? 40. Okay. First of all, you're 40. Are you married? Are you single? I get married. I'm married. Say again. You broke up. Define egotistical. Define egotistical. You. No, no. Divine egotistical. You can't say me. You, you use the word. Now, please define it for the audience. When I, when I bring up the word egotistical, your face is right next to it. Like, okay. So look, I'm gonna, I'm gonna. No, no. See, this is how this, this is what's gonna come off as a man. So here's what you, this is what's gonna happen, chick. Either we're gonna do it my way. I'm trying to give you an opportunity. But if you want to go that way because you don't, because you're not talking. So you can do it right. You can either, you can either. See, this is when these women who just like to talk. So you can either. No answer. Yeah. Yep. Gave it an opportunity. Feel sorry for your husband. See, what you do is you call women and their [ __ ] and what's the first thing to come out of their mouth? Shame, insults, guilt, the need to be right. Sign language. There you go. Bring your back home. Give you an opportunity to sit down and have a conversation. But see, you, or not you, you throw that [ __ ] out there. But they can't stand on it. So we don't need you for that. We've heard this [ __ ] enough of our lives. She wouldn't expect me to ask her to define the word now. Oh, they want me to actually. He actually wants me to know what I'm talking about. Oh, zippy to do that. No, man, you're gonna have to stand on what, on what you say. Stand on your disrespect. But at least be able to define it. You're gonna have to do better than that. Gonna have to do better than. Don't you understand? You got a 40-year-old woman who could not even get through three sentences of a conversation. When I say three sentences, three paragraphs in the conversation. But she did. Level. Oh, hello. Hi, Kevin. How are you? I am well. How old are you? 31. Okay. What's going on with you? What's going on with your connection? Oh, gosh, to be honest, I just gave you my. Oh, right. So, to be honest, I just came into my hometown. Haven't been here in 11 years, so that might be why it's kind of spotty. I finally got to you. Awesome. I've been like screenshotting, attacking you. Oh, sorry. Yes. Okay. I gotta call her my cousin. That's my cousin. All right, man. Oh, I, I appreciate how calm you are. You have a nice, um, calm sense about you. And I understand, um, human anatomy a little bit. And I love, uh, your shows. They're very informative. It's great information to take. I'm a six-year vegan. I don't know if you know too much about that, but I like to get that out. Um, cocaine's a hell of a drug. Goddamn. Hey, how are you? Hi, I'm good. How are you? I'm okay. Um, how old are you? I am 20. 20. Oh my goodness. Yeah. So what are we talking about today? We are talking about. Did you have a question? Did you want to discuss? Because I have several topics. Okay. Sorry. I'm just saying I get a lot of DMs. Okay. Well, that's good to know. Um, well, to introduce myself, um, I'm Emerson P. Daniel, a junior strategic legal management communications major, concentrated in organizational management, um, from Ellicott City, Maryland, and I go to Howard University. Um, and so what I want to talk to you about is I'm a big fan of your work. And so I just, I just want to chat. You know, if you were younger, I know you heard that. So if you were a young woman in my shoes, what is the best tip that you would that you would give me? What did your father tell you? What does my father tell me? Well, my father tells me that he watches you, actually. Um, all the men in my life, like the older men, they watch you and they say to, well, you asked one lady if she was raised to be a wife, and I was raised to be a wife. Um, and that's how I feel. I find that amongst my peers, that's not the popular narrative. You know, you seem as if you're gonna like, like you're wrong for wanting to be a wife or wanting to be a woman in a relationship. Um, are you in a relationship? No. Have you been in a relationship? Yes. How long ago? Um, I got out of it in February. Oh, did it last a year? When you graduate, what do you plan on doing? Um, well, I'm interning right now. I don't have a specific, like, job that I want, um, but I have a bunch of intern internships. Um, what do you want to do in your 20s? What do I want to do in my 20s? Um, if I had it my way, I would, um, be a stay-at-home mom and raise my children. Um, and then, or I would start my career when I have children. I would take care of them and then I would, you know, when they get old enough, I would want to go back to work, but I would definitely like to have that flexibility. How many children do you want? Two. But then I also think about living in this modern day. I fear for children and I fear for, you know, the way that I feel for them growing up in this world. And what I mean by that is in terms of, you know, they don't play outside anymore, they want to be involved in the screens. Um, and there's a less interpersonal communication. Going. Whose responsibility is that? Their parents. And that's why I would, I would, you know, step in there. But then they would be like a different kid. And when you're, when you're a different kid, you're like, Mom, I want to do this, I want to do this. And it can just become a huge fight. Fight with whom? Between a child and their parents. On what planet? Okay, not a fight, not a fight, but the kid is always nagging and saying, oh, I want a phone, I want it. It's called a belt. I know, I know. But the belt. I mean, yeah, I'm gonna be, but I shouldn't say that. You said you're raised to be a wife? Yes. Would your mother raise you to do for me? What did my mother raise me to do? What for a man? Um, be a support system, um, cook, clean, um, to be, I don't, you know, I'm on here and I'm on live with you, honestly, so I'm gonna, like, I'm at a loss for words in terms of what it means to be a wife. But I feel. How can you? How can you say you were raised to be a wife? In society, there's a certain connotation as what a wife is. New, simple words. Don't worry about the college words. A wife is a, is a woman in a relationship. Oh, my connection is. Or your connection's breaking. My connection's fine. I have five bars. Can you see me now? Okay. Oh, well, it doesn't have a connotation, man. My wife is a job duty, just like a cooking, cleaning, take care of the house. Cooking, cleaning, or something you have to do for yourself. What specifically did your mother teach you to do for the man in your life? There wasn't something where she sat down and was like, Emerson, you can't, then you can't, then you aren't raised to be a wife. Okay. But I saw her be a wife. Yeah. I, exactly. I saw her be a wife. So you can watch somebody do kung fu. That doesn't matter. Okay. So to you, what does it mean to be a wife? Okay, you need these are the questions you need to ask your mother. You need to go ask your mother, Mom, what does it mean to be a wife? What am I supposed to do for my husband? How am I supposed to do these things? Okay. I think he'll be a better person to ask than me. She's your mother. Does she have the knowledge? Then why didn't she transfer it to you? That's her number one duty. Well, she, you know, she says, Emerson, like, I mean, when you're growing up, you know, they say, you know, don't wear provocative clothing. They told you what not to do. But what did she tell you to do? Well, you cook, you clean, you have to do that for your survival. You support them in their endeavors with. Yeah, no, that's a passive. That's basically, give me instructions and I'll do. No proactive. I asked you a question. Did she have the knowledge? You said yes. I asked you why didn't she transmit it to you? If it's her number one job, the mother is the first teacher of the child and the transmitter of the culture. Why did your mother, who has the knowledge, not transfer to you? I'm not talking to you. I don't know. And that's a question you need to ask your mother. Because that's one of the problems we have today is so many women aren't teaching their daughters how to be wives. Does your mother, uh, Kurt? I'm not talking to you, sir. I'm talking to the women. Please respect my show. Did your mother encourage you to go to college? Yes. Your mother encourage you to pursue a career? Yes. So your mother has encouraged you more to be an individual? Um, no. In terms of going to college, you know, she says, you need to get a college education. But what for? What reason? To get, to get a job. To get a job. To be an individual? No, no, no. See, your instinct is to defend your mother. I'm not trying to. What I'm saying, your mother has told you what not to do, then she's told you what to do. Don't dress provocatively. Go to college to get a job, a career. But I asked you, what did she tell you to do for a man? And there's crickets. Then you said you were raised to be a wife, but by whom? This is where the women are failing. You young girls, mothers included. You said your mother has the knowledge, then go ask her. Mom, you told me not to just provocatively. You encouraged me to go to college, but what do I need to do for my husband? Okay. So she's told me to be a confidant, to be, you know, supportive. That is passive. How? What do you mean by passive? Confidant means I come to you and I confide in you. What has she actively told you to do for a man, like cooking and cleaning? What she actually told you? She said, be there to support him. How to be a confidant? In short, your mother hasn't taught you. Okay. So in terms of, I understand. So for you, or not for you, but in general, what does it mean to be a wife? What is this active, um, definition in general? It's for women of the village to teach the younger women of the village. I'm pointing you to the knowledge base. I'm supposed to teach the men how to be warriors. I'm supposed to teach the men how to fight. That's not my job to teach you. You have a mother. The first question you asked me is X, Y, and Z. And I said, what? What does your mother? The first thing I said is, what does your father tell you? Yeah. First thing I said. And you said, he told me these things. All right, that's his job. That's his duty. What has your mother told you to do for a man, your husband? She's told you what to do for Emerson, to be a self-sustaining adult. Cooking and cleaning, you do that for yourself. Going to college. She did not tell you to go to college to find a husband. Did she? Yes. Did she teach you how? Well, then what? Your mother was talking to you. Don't you approach a man. But what did she teach you to do to basically to nothing? Sit pretty, passive. And this is why Becky, Marisol, and Mylène get the black men because the women aren't teaching you guys how to actually go after. She's telling you to go to college to find a husband, but she's not telling her to actively even put yourself. You're just supposed to sit there. Well, how would this app, how would this, um, how would this approach work if you wanted to succeed scholastically or academically? Just showing up. What approach? Just showing up. Oh, it wouldn't. It wouldn't happen. Okay. [Music] Okay. Well, our men are women supposed to approach men? It's not the question. It's not the question. Your mother is supposed to teach you how to do something for a man, how to attract a man, how to keep a man, how to work with the man. I understand. Do you have anything? I want to know. I want to know. Okay. But you need to ask your mother. I'm not going to overstep that line. Do you have any sisters? Yes. Do you have any brothers? Yes. Does your father teach your brother? Your brothers older or younger? Younger. Does your father teach your brothers? What a man is supposed to do? If, how much, how much younger? How's it, how old is the youngest? 17. So he's not quite there yet, but I thought. Okay. Well, if your father is teaching you and watching me, you should be teaching his sons. But I'm asking your, your mother, and she taught. How many sisters do you have? One. You're older or younger? Older. Is she married? What is your sister taught you about finance, working with the man? She has well, she is a stay-at-home mom and she worked, but then, you know, once they had a child. But what does she taught you? I mean, how many years old is she than you? Um, like 16. So by the same mother? Yes. So your mother taught. She's a half, she's a half-sister. Meaning what? Different father. Different father. Was she raised in the house with you? No, because she's old. I mean, so it was, it was a long time ago, like it was in. She, all I'm trying to understand is if your older sister's married, who taught her how to be a wife? That's all I'm trying to understand. Trying to understand what your mother is teaching you. And it doesn't sound like your mother's teaching you how to be a wife. Is she? And if you're saying, was your sister, your 16-year, your sister is older, was she raised by your mother? Well, yes, kind of. Okay. So your mom should. Okay. So as a wife, you should give your husband undivided attention, right? Ask your mom. Why can't you tell me anything? Because I'm not your mother. Why is that? Why is it so hard for you to ask your mother these questions? It's not. But, but I would like to learn from you. I'm, it's not my job to teach you. Whose job is it to teach you? My mom. Why don't you want to learn from your mother? I do. Isn't she married? Do you guys have a relationship where you can talk about things? Okay. I will ask her. I will ask her. Do you understand this out of place? You asking a man how to be a wife and you haven't asked your mother how to be a wife, and your mother hasn't taught you how to be a wife. Your mother taught you, don't dress provocatively and go to college. I would argue. I would argue against that. I don't care what you argue against, ma'am. You're arguing in ignorance. You're 20 years old and you're arguing ignorance. Any argument you would make is going to be feelings based. The same woman that says I was raised to be a wife, and I asked you how, and we've just broken it down step by step. Okay. So being raised to be a wife is more so from an instruction or active sense and not from observation. Can you observe how to drive a car? You can observe it. What does it take? Do you learn? Can you drive one just by observation? Not completely. No. Not completely. Not even partially. Yes, we can check that. I grew up in the car, and then when it was time for me to drive it. Check that attitude. Okay. It's inappropriate, young lady. Okay. Would you talk to your father that way? Do you know how to cook? Yes. So you think you can, you think the best way to learn how to cook is watching someone and then going off memory? No, that's not the best way to learn. Well, then if, if watching is part of it, but it's not all of it. Yeah. Your mother, your mother has not taught you. She's told you what not to do and where to go. She told you to go to college to find a husband, but she hasn't told you what to do to find one. And she even told. So y'all got conversations to have. And this is the point. And why am I doing this, folks? Is because in the black community, black women do not teach their daughters how to become wives. Even the women who know how to be wives don't teach it. They teach their daughters to go to school and become individuals. And you get young ladies like you who are confused. And then we ask, go to your mothers. You got this over reverence for mom. It's like, oh, I don't want to do that. When you should be going and saying, why didn't you teach me this stuff? Because in the sexual marketplace, in the wider world, you're behind. You said in your 20s, you want to be a wife. You are praised to be a wife. You're raised to get a job, the school, you get this, you spent all that, you spent more time talking about who you are and your degree and everything else. And I ask you about being a wife, and it's crickets. So can you honestly say you're being prepped to become a wife, or you're being prepped to become a single woman working? Being prepped to become a single woman working. And if you don't want that, you need to go to the woman who you say has the knowledge and ask, why didn't you teach me? And you need to press her 10 times harder than you pressing the stranger on Instagram. But can you do that? I want to hear about what, what happens when you press your mother? Because you should ask her, Mom, why didn't you teach me? Okay. Ask your sister. Ask the women in your family that are married. Have a good one. You too. See, this is, this is something that, um, goes on a lot. A lot of times the women in the, in the previous generations, they're, they're proud to be married, but they openly won't teach their daughters because in places where we don't, don't want to admit, a lot of times, you know, like, I don't want to, I don't want to, I don't want to make my next round of competition. Good conversation. Mothers teach your daughters. Mothers teach your daughters. See, and the funny thing is, I had a more respectful conversation with a 20-year-old than a 40-year-old married woman. Ah, let's see. Better take this person. All right, a couple more and we're out of here. Mm-hmm. Mamas, don't let your babies grow up to be cowboys. Hello. How you doing? I'm all right. How old are you? 34. 34. All right. What's the question? What do you got? My question is dealing with a man and he runs a business. His family owns a business. And you're part of that business? You're part of that business? Yes. Part of the business. And it's the, it's, it's the business part is fine, but the personal part is [ __ ] up between him and I. And my question is, I, I don't even know if you can answer this, but is it worth staying in a multi-million dollar business with someone that when it comes to the personal side of things, it's just not the best? And happiness part of life. Is your name on the documents? My name is not on anything. There you go. Oh, man, that sucks. Only because it's, it's a really good business. It's a really good business. It's not yours. It's not mine, but it's a lot to learn from. And maybe I can branch off and do for myself, you know, in due time. So why, this is your boyfriend? Yes. How long have you been together? Going on four years now. Why are they not your husband? I guess I didn't really require or think about being a husband and a wife. But you, but you're an employee of the business? Yes, I am. Why are things [ __ ] up? What'd you do? I think I jumped into the personal side too quick. What'd you do to [ __ ] it up, though? As far as me messing things up, it's just, I would say nagging about the lack of love that isn't being shown. And so I feel like on my part, what are you basing it? What are you, what are you comparing it to? I'm comparing it to just growing up and seeing my grandparents love each other 100%. You don't know what you saw with your grandparents. You know what your grandparents showed you. You know what happened. They closed that door. Have you had a better relationship? I have. Yes. How long ago was that? That is about six years ago. I was young. That was, um, a 10-year relationship. I was 19 all the way through, 19 to 29. Yeah. Why didn't you marry him? Like that, it's just, it's not. And when I didn't really require marriage, I wouldn't really looking at, you know, wanting to be married. 10 years. Did you see the first woman I talked to? 13 years. I saw that. Yes. So are you sure you're not complaining? Who left the 10-year relationship? You or him? I let, I let it go. Are you sure you're not comparing this current relationship to the 10-year relationship? And I think so, just because, yeah, that's why I asked you. You're comparing this relationship to the relationship you let go. Not really. For a relationship, maybe crazy to marry. Let me just say, any a man would be crazy to marry a woman who'd stick around for years and not require marriage. So the relationship is [ __ ] up. [Music] What is it supposed to be? Not supposed to be a marriage, right? I guess not. I wouldn't know because my parents, I didn't grow up with the, of my father and a father together. My mom was never married. So I don't. Ma'am, I can pull people from the worst third world countries who know that you don't meet with somebody for 10 years and you don't get married. Yeah, a bunch of you ladies just rebels and you don't want to be married because marriage comes with rules. Hold your hand up. How many times you got, uh, I got quite a few. Rebel. I got quite a few. What is it? What is the life in for? How does, how does life look for a rebel at 55? A life for a rebel at 55. Did you go to college? No. Then I go to college. You graduate high school? I graduated high school. Okay. So that's my best education. I had was high school. Zombie. Should I go get married? What does life look like for a rebel at 55? I feel like that would be somewhat all over the place. Okay. Okay. At 65, when you can't work anymore, are you gonna have your 1.9 million dollars to retire on? Looking at it from right now, I don't see that. So that would be a no. No. All right, then, uh, when you run out of money, what happens to you? Hmm. You can't pay your rent or your mortgage. Where you gonna be? What happens when somebody can't pay their rent or their mortgage? What happens? They end up in a, a facility, possibly, if they have a bed for these people. What happens if somebody can't pay their rent, their mortgage, before that happens, what happens? What's the process called? Eviction. [Music] And you have no relatives, you're not married, you got no kids. Where you gonna go live? You got no money. Is that this facility you're talking about? You said, what do you think you're going to go live in this facility you're talking about? I mean, I, slim to, I probably, I don't have no. Probably not. Then where you gonna go? [Music] The only thing I can think of is just being with family. With the younger. No, the younger one. So you're gonna be an elderly burden to your extended family. What happens if a man gets evicted? What happens if a man who's not married, has no kids, runs out of money, he can't pay his rent, and there's no facilities? Where does he, where does he go? Probably the street. Thank you. Same place where you'll be. And we need to start telling more women, y'all.

Are going to be homeless because I know where in hell if somebody needs to take care of a bunch of elderly rebel women who mismanaged their lives because they didn't want to get along with somebody am I? If men did the same thing, the street would be waiting for men too, right? Yeah, relationships are optional for you. That's how you've been living your life, right? Yeah, I've been pretty much my whole life.

Okay, well then you better be able to take care of yourself. You better be able to make enough money for two incomes to be able to pay for yourself until you die.

Did you not? Did no one ever tell you that? No, no, I... No. So when you, when you got old, what did you think was gonna happen? It was just gonna work out? Well, I'm thinking that a successful business will be put into place and stay in place, which is what's going on now. You don't have a business. You're a high school graduate and how old are you? 30? What? 34. At 34 years old, a high school graduate, all of a sudden you're gonna, this manifests the successful business is going to produce enough cash for you to live comfortably for the rest of your life. 80% of businesses fail inside the first five years. I'm about to find out because I do. I am going to open a laundry mat for my community. You need it. It's a necessity. You're broke. You need a laundromat for your community. You need to have a house to live in when you're old. How are you going to worry about? How are you going to worry about the laundromat for the community and you can't take care of yourself? Financial security is where is the money gonna come from? Where's the money going to come from? Where's the seed money? Where's the seed money? The start-up money? Where's that coming from? Because I am native. They do. Native? What? Native American. So they do what percentage? My mother's native, my father's black. Okay. I grew up mostly with native. I am happy, but I grew up mostly with the natives. Yeah, we're trying the Thon Awsomes. Okay. I'm 16 Seminole. Keep going. The Thon Awsomes in, um, Arizona. And so I do, I am from an Indian reservation. That's all I know. Okay. So, so they do, um, help with startup costs. They do provide different incentives. There are no Indians. There are no Indian reservations that are thriving. Commerce. Alcohol and addiction was running rampant through most of the reserves in this United States. You know that, right? I do know that. Yes. That's why they need laundromats. So it's not going to be an economic boom. You'll take the money you get, sink it into. Come on. I know what life is like on a reservation from Oklahoma. And so my thought is doing that will help with more of my financial security. I don't know about freedom. It has to work though. You're going to put a laundromat in for poor people.

A laundromat for poor people is supposed to provide economic security. Doesn't even sound right. It does. I didn't think of that. I mean, I don't look at them as poor. I just, I didn't think of it as like that. Businesses have to make a profit. If they need a laundromat, that means they don't even can't even afford washing dryers at their homes. If you, if you're half or a quarter, you know the situation it is on the reservation. The booming business is alcohol. What is set up on the borders of the reservations? Liquor stores, right? Yeah. And the border lines? Yeah, right. Because they can't sell it on the reservation, right? And what happens when people get their money? What do they run to? The laundromat or the liquor store? To the liquor store. Your godfather is an intelligent brother. I know a lot about a lot.

Somebody got a choice between taking their money to go to the liquor store or washing their clothes. What they gonna do? More than likely go get some, some drink. So why you think putting the little bit of money you have in this business is gonna make you economically secure? Because it's the best idea I got. And it's just not a good idea. Just because it's a necessity? Not. It's a necessity for whom? For the community. Okay. Good luck with that. But a lot of things are necessities for communities, but if there's a good business, it would already be there. Yeah, well, they try. They try. Okay. So bottom line is what we're showing is another woman who's just kind of living life on autopilot and you're just getting older. And there's nothing more vulnerable than elderly, unmarried, childless women. Where in the world do you see a bunch of women who are 60, 65 plus, unmarried, no children, living their best lives? So my point is, you better get this relationship [ __ ] figured out. That is what has been human security, especially in Native America. You don't see a bunch of Native women just roaming the prairies free. They had husbands and children. Our people more than anybody else. Yeah. Get it together. You only got you. 34. You ain't got but four more. Don't [ __ ] around and become 40. It's a wrap. Peace out. All right. Yeah, I think, yeah, if y'all want to see some depressing stuff, go look at what stuff looks like on reservations.

I'm sorry for my native brothers. Look, ladies, you may not like my approach, my method, but at the end of the day, women are walking around far too. The average woman is walking around like, "It'll just work out. It'll just work out." I need to admit, y'all have been sold a bill of goods and, uh, we're at the point where beggars can't be choosers. That's why I said women love women. Ageism, sexes, there's so much stuff to pull out of this call. There's so much stuff. And the sad part is this feminism, Mormonism, single stuff that was piped into communities is overrepresented in black and brown folks. Um, ladies, you better figure out how to become a, become of use to a man. Two incomes are better than one. Two people splitting the bills is better than one. Somebody to watch your back is better than one. You best figure it out or buy a dog and die alone. But, uh, but are you gonna be able to afford the dog? That's the question. Can you afford the dog? Fair question. Tomorrow night on YouTube is going to be dope. The six, the success component evening.

Hi, how are you? I'm good. I'm sorry. Um, you're what? My daughter's just woke up. So, oh, okay. How did she? She's one year old. Okay. Uh, how old are you? 29. What'd you want to talk about? Um, I've seen when you first started, they said it's something about cheating and sick. I mean, I really don't know, but relationships. Well, I said, are you married? Are you single? I'm single. Um, I said that women love men who cheat. There she goes. I'm sorry. You say what now? As I said, women love men who cheat. No, I don't think so. Then why are they the men y'all write the songs about? The man I keep going back to, who go back to? Women in general, man. No, I don't think so. I'm not a woman. I didn't say you. Who are the women? I mean, you're 29. Are we really gonna say that women don't run back to men who cheat on them? Yeah, they don't write the love songs. Are you serious? No, not me. I'm not that typical. I didn't. Okay, take it away from you, man. I don't want to have a conversation about you. I said women write. You're saying y'all. So that's generalizing. Yeah, because it's generally true. Well, yeah, if you want to put it like that, then yeah. But yeah, generalization doesn't have to make black people tend to have this. And then generalizations. I don't know why women resist categories, categorization. But, um, uh, is this your only child? No, I have a 12-year-old son. Same father? No, my 12-year-old son's father died back in 2017. Are you going to marry her father? No. Why not? He was abusive. That's why I caught it off. How long are you going to give it? A year? You were together a year and then you got pregnant? Yeah, I got pregnant when I clocked it off. So, so we're going to make generalizations that seems to be a general pattern too, where women tend to be pregnant longer than with a guy, or women tend to get pregnant by men who are toxic. That's the same. That's in the same line of cheating men. Women love men who are bad for them, cheaters, abusers. These are some, some are walking everywhere. Write all the stories about. They ain't talking about the guys that are normal, going to work. So is that, are you, are you in that generalization? That one kind of slaughter? But I love a man who goes to work. But did you pick me like that to make babies for? Yes. My son's father was that type of man. That's why I waited so long. Babies? Not one baby, two. Yeah, I had another baby 12 years later. But men are always curious to, especially when women already have one child. Why are y'all having babies the second time before you're married? This is not how I planned it. I didn't answer the question. You were having unprotected sex and you had one baby already. It makes no sense. When y'all say this kind of stuff. Not how you planned it. You, you had unprotected sex. You know how this happens. Do you want to get married one day? Yes, I would love to. Then you have to explain this to somebody. You're right. You don't have to explain why did you have a baby before you got married? And the answer's gonna be, it's not gonna, I planned it. That's not gonna fly. Most men ain't gonna. Most men ain't gonna be like the guys that will tolerate. That'll be the guys that are just stepping sex. Are you prepared to wait another 18 years before you get married? Until your one-year-old is out of house? Yeah, I can. If it falls to that. But in 18 years, I'll be reaching that mark. Where's your? What mark? Um, I mean, I will be up in age. You know how do you. Right. That's kind of what you chose though, man, by having a baby with a guy that you had married. You're right. So men are always curious as to why a man should come along, or why a man would choose to come along and marry a woman who has one, two kids by two different men. And then the second one in particular is what a man that can be considered toxic or abusive. Are you in therapy of any kind? No, I'm, I'm currently searching for a good, um, therapist. So my, um, is helping me out with that. Are you dating right now? Um, I was, but it didn't work out. So at this point, I'm just back into focus into myself and my kids. Man, you put yourself in a difficult position. Difficult position to me. And we just don't understand. We're just like, why? But all right, she's unless she's getting restless. Have a good one. Bye-bye, guys.