Why Dating is So Hard

Yo, what is going on, guys? Got a video for you here today. Why is dating so damn hard? Let's just jump right into it. Don't forget to leave your thoughts and your comments.

Those of you that are having a bad time dating. Yeah, uh-huh. Getting thousands of comments saying, "You just want to be understood, but you're not really giving me much to go on." Just by the way, she's talking about men here, and men have made it very clear as to why they're not participating in dating or why they're taking a step back from it. Like, I just find it interesting how so many people on the internet, guys, they claim like men are just these confusing enigmas, but men have actually made this stuff very damn clear. There's quite a lot to go on here. You should get a copy. I'm really trying to extend an olive branch and like have an honest discussion.

I feel 98% confident that the first thing you're looking at is whether she's pretty. So, basically, she's asking, "Are you failing because your standards for looks are too high?" And no, but let's go bit by bit. I asked men, "Do you like women?" Hang on, that's two questions. Am I failing just cuz I can't get a hot one and do I like women? And the answers are no and nothing in the universe is all good or all bad. There are things we like about women and things we don't like, and me and the boys have been having a chat, and we tend to agree that as time goes on, the juice gets less worth the squeeze.

I think this has been a pretty commonly agreed on thing, guys, where, you know, modern women these days just aren't really worth the effort. You could make more of an argument on traditional women, feminine women, and that sort of thing, but the quality of women these days has certainly dropped. And it doesn't mean that, oh, men just dislike women, or men are out here trying to bash women, or whatever the case may be. It's just that a lot of guys don't actually see the value in having relationships, and approaching modern-day women, and getting married, and that sort of thing. Um again, the reasons for this are fairly damn obvious, but it's just gotten way worse over time. Like, the young dudes, in particular, are getting absolutely screwed over by this. I've seen dudes who are like married for 30 years, and they're oftentimes really empathetic towards the younger generation, because they know how terrible it's gotten.

This is the standard female delusion chart. It's a bit of a mockery of how women view men, and themselves, and each other, but I also punch men in it. Over here, we have anime fans who are too happy to be talking to any girl at all, and over here, we have the guy who calls every girl a two, so he can feel like a big man. I think you might be falling victim to this. There's two things you have to remember about the dating world right now. One is that when people get together, they tend to end up with someone on the same level, or at least very similar, but people are getting together less, and hooking up more, which looks more like this. And that dynamic is being mediated by technology, and it feels like this.

This girl has hair like you. I drew her a year ago. So, it's not as much about looks as you think. Men. Yeah, women have this misconception, by the way. Like, they really think that men have this end-all, be-all uh thing when it comes to looks. Like, obviously, men are attracted to attractive women. That's fairly obvious, okay? Everybody knows this. But, the thing is, if a man is looking for a relationship and stuff like that, you don't have to be some top tier model to lock down a guy. There are plenty of women who are highly attractive who will just straight up lose to women who are pleasant to be around. And that's the thing these women just don't seem to understand is they think that oh, if if I just keep improving my looks because that's what Chad wants from me, then you know, that's the reality, okay? And I'm going to be able to lock down Chad and that's all that men care about. It's like no, that's all that Chad cares about because that's all he's using you for. So this is a misconception that women have, guys. It's actually crazy. You'll you'll have women who are highly attractive, but are just completely intolerable, but they think that the reason they can't get a relationship is because they're not attractive enough or because they don't have some surgery or something. It's actually It's actually very sad, by the way. Um that women come to that conclusion, but the reason they come to that conclusion is because they have nothing else to offer men. When they're going out there dating, the dudes don't want anything else to do with them. They don't want to hang around you because the personality is usually not fantastic, you know, or she just adds more stress to his life. So the women infer that well, the reason why he doesn't keep me around more is because I'm not attractive enough. But usually that's not actually the case. You don't have to be some supermodel woman to lock down a guy, even a successful one. You just have to be pleasant to be around, but uh unfortunately, that seems like a tall order these days. Men and women have a hard time understanding each other. I learned about this by reading and taking notes.

>> Like how heavily would you weight the looks category?

I feel 98% confident that the first thing you're looking at is whether she's pretty. Chronologically, yes. Most of us can take one glance at you and know right away like you're not getting past this line or this one or you're a contender for this box, but most people will end up with someone very close to them in looks. So So, shouldn't be so worried about that first part. It's mostly for show.

Would you say that you could completely disregard it given that everything else that you're interested in is fulfilled for you? This woman's a little bit delusional. So, she's trying to say that dating is difficult for men because we overvalue looks and that's all we care about, but obviously that's completely untrue. Um obviously men do care about looks, but again, it's not the be-all end-all. If you're a woman and you are single, it's typically not because of the way you look. Now, a lot of dudes might roast you for the way you look. You might make some questionable uh you know, decisions as to how you present yourself, but this is not typically the bottleneck that's actually preventing women from getting into relationships with men. Men actually have very little requirements when it comes to who they will take seriously. Um and a lot of modern-day women simply don't fit that guys. Like, you know, if you go ask a guy, he'll be like, "Well, I want a woman who's nice to me and who you know, who isn't overweight basically, and then you're like 80% of the way there." But, a lot of the women can't even do the nice to you part. You know, like you open doors for strangers these days. You open doors for women, and you know, I remember the last time I opened a door for a woman who had two children um because she was going to struggle to get out, and the woman didn't even look at me. Didn't even say thank you. And nothing of the sort, right? And this is the kind of thing where like, "Okay, do the do the looks really matter if the women are just being unpleasant?" You know, do the looks really matter if I'm going to get screwed over because of common law marriage? Do the looks really matter if um she doesn't have the capability of actually pair bonding with you, which a lot of them don't? You know, so again, a lot of guys will actually look past the looks or it's not as important as these women think that actually is.

Well, no, that's not realistic. Nobody is just going to say, "Let's forget about that." It's more like there's a minimum for each one of these sections, and then what we learn about you here and here can move you up or down. That's totally accurate. And I would say again, it doesn't even like you don't have to be a supermodel to get into the top tier, you know, keepers here that you would marry, for example, for a man. Um like this woman's saying, "What? Are men just supposed to completely disregard how you look? So, we're just supposed to accept you if you you know, you can't control yourself when you eat whatsoever, for example?" Like that's obviously ridiculous. And let's be real about it, guys. Women actually have far higher standards when it comes to men, even for things that we can't change. So, like height, for example, or you know, receding hairlines and so on. Maybe you're going bald. I mean, you can prevent that um to a large degree if you get on top of it early. But that sort of thing. Like women have way higher requirements when it comes to these sorts of things. So, I I do find it weird how, you know, these women will be like, "Yeah, but you know, all you care about is looks." Maybe all Chad cares about is looks, because he doesn't need anything or want anything else from you.

listic. Nobody is just going to say, "Let's forget about that." It's more like there's a minimum for each one of these sections, and then what we learn about you here and here can move you up or down. I have heard guys tell their girlfriends, "You are really cool and I really like you, but I I don't want my friends to see me with you until you lose weight and therefore become more valuable."

Would you say that if you combined all the other categories, they're not going to quite measure up to the looks? See, I think your question is coming from the wrong place. That's different for everyone. Some guys will put up with a lot of crap here for good enough looks, and some guys will give up looks for good enough person, and you never know who feels what. That's why I made the chart. You look at how they treat you, and then you figure out why. And I think for the most part men can be really quite lenient with looks. You know, if they get a woman who actually cares about him, who has other qualities that he's interested in, for example, hasn't been with 500 men would be a good start. You know, again, men are very um flexible with this sort of thing. Like I've said this many times in this video already, but you don't need to be a supermodel to lock down a man that you might want.

And And this is a fallacy that a lot of women have, guys. Like I'm telling you it is so damn common because the thing is the men only want to have them around for one thing because they don't see benefit elsewhere. You know, like let's be real about it, okay? You know, you've got women like this over on TikTok. The Chads and the men that they're hooking up with don't need this woman around for emotional support. They don't They don't want uh her to cook him food, probably. You know, she's a a lot of them are not going to be particularly pleasant. Like they're not going to make your life stress-free. Let's put it that way. This is not These women are typically not the women, at least these days, that you're going to want to come home to because often times you're you're just kind of going to get another headache, and men don't want extra headaches. Men are very, very simple. If you can make a man's life easier, if you're pleasant to be around, you are off to a fantastic start. Throw into that that you don't um you know, completely ruin your body with your eating choices, and and you're most of the way there, but usually women are missing one of those things, and usually it's in the attitude department, honestly. route why. And the biggest reason that I hear men giving for a low score is this section here, and I think that's the section you pay attention to the least. He's absolutely correct, by the way. Th- This is a big one, guys. Like the reason why some of these women or a lot of these women can't be seen in public with the men that they're into is because those men don't want to be embarrassed. You know, like they're out here hooking up with these Chads and having their fun and all of that sort of thing and they're like, "Well, why won't he take me out to dinner?" The reason why the dude doesn't want to take you out to dinner is probably not because he wants to, you know, it's not even so much about money. A lot of guys it's just like, "Well, why would I?" And also it's embarrassing. You know, there is nothing more embarrassing for a man than if he takes you to, I don't know, some some lunch spot or some dinner spot and then you know the waiter, okay? Or you know, um a bunch of the dudes there or something like that. This is not This is This is highly highly repulsive to men, okay? If you've been with a whole bunch of other guys, chances are your pair-bonding ability is fried and it's also uh you know, getting commitment out of men is going to be a lot harder for you. They renamed it purity unzones three. It's more inclusive.

See, I have never had a hard time finding women that look good enough. I've never had a hard time finding women who are fun to be around. I I think maybe he's being a little bit generous, but I don't know. May- maybe he uh maybe he can look past the the modern-day personalities. I've never had a very hard time finding both in the same person, but I have always had a very hard time finding women who were not otherwise occupied. Yeah, and this is the real deal breaker, isn't it? Right? When dudes are out there dating is Okay, this this woman she might seem fantastic. She might seem su- super nice and you know, she's uh pleasant to be around and she's feminine. And then you find out she's been with like 35 dudes. And let's be real, like women will absolutely always lie about this. Everybody knows this at this point. But it's it's uh it's something that is highly highly repulsive to men. This is probably the equivalent of a woman dating a man and then finding out that he is unemployed at like 27 years of age. You know, she'd be like, "Mhm." You know, she'll be like, "Okay, let's just assume the woman's like 29 or something and she's on the clock. She's ready to have her family and settle down with the kids now that she's done partying and she finds out the dude she's been dating is essentially homeless." Right? Like that's that's probably the the mental equivalent. Women are just going to be like, "Ooh, I can't I can't have a relationship with this guy." And maybe rightfully so. You know, how they're going to support a family or whatever the hell. But, the point is this is a very, very big issue for men. That's where we get the name of my channel from. When women are so occupied all the time, it is difficult to bond with them. That is what makes dating hard. It's these guys.

Remember this drawing of the girl with your hair do? She's sucking the life out of this guy through the phone. Do you understand what that means? If you use dating apps, you probably get a lot of low-quality messages. Well, instead of those, what we get is nothing. Unless you are in the top 10%, which I was for a while, but when I aged out and ended up down here, I thought I got shadow banned from Bumble.

I like this guy's card. Let me just pull it back here for a second. This So, what he's saying here is anyone any man who's below a seven is essentially invisible, but he's actually taking it a step further and he's made a a cute little ghost card here that says not people. And th- this is kind of the situation where we're at, guys, right? It's like if if women don't really view you in this top percentage here, you might as well not be considered a human man. Like you you're essentially invisible. Like it's really gotten that bad and I don't particularly care if women find me visible or not. I'm not out here trying to talk to women, for example, it's not really you know, my cup of tea as it were. Um but the fact of the matter is that most men are completely invisible to women. So when women start to complain about dating, men aren't going to have empathy because most men are completely invisible. Like com- completely. And the crazy thing is guys is you can actually have your life together. You can you can have a fantastic job. You can be a guy who hits the gym and all of that sort of thing. But then there comes the issue of like presenting it on social You have to maintain this stupid appearance on social media because for modern-day women, unfortunately, social media is essentially reality. So you you can be some doctor guy who makes good money and you hit the gym and that sort of thing. But if you can't present yourself well on social media as well, she's like you're essentially just not a person until maybe she hears about your career directly or something like that. But this is this is absolutely true, okay? Below a seven, you could even argue higher depending on how subjective the woman is, but below a seven men, yeah, you're essentially invisible for the most part. Shadow banned from Bumble. These are the results for the average male dating app user. And remember, some guys get a lot of matches. I used to match with about half of my swipes and this is the average. So the average guy swipes right 52% of the time, gets a match only 2% of the time, and then I can't even draw this. There's no room on the paper. This is like enlarged to show texture. Most matches don't respond. Most responses don't meet up and most of the ones you meet don't go anywhere.

Think about what that much rejection does to us. And you can Yeah, and what ends up happening is men just kind of stop participating, right? It's because like what's the point of continuing to reach out to these women, to put all this effort in and all of that if you're just going to be met with crickets in response. Now, the thing is guys, I think that men should be putting effort into themselves regardless, you know, like hitting the gym, trying to make money, trying to make a a life for themselves and that sort of stuff, but you know, doing that in order to not be rejected by a woman is a completely ridiculous strategy. You're just going to be losing your hair if if this is your strategy going forward. You know, actively doing things to impress women or try to attract women probably not the best strategy. If you're going to go to the gym, make sure it's because it's something you enjoy and you want to be healthy or something like that, but like really, the fact that this guy had to zoom in by the way because this is accurate, right? He had to zoom in so harshly to show you the average man's results. Completely insane. does to us. And you can make fun of us and a lot of people do for saying that a dating app hurt our feelings, but it's just biology. Rejection causes a physical, chemical process in the body and it feels really bad. So, you're on one end absorbing infinity likes and feeling like a princess, but for us it's like, well, why did you match if you didn't want to talk to me? Yeah, and let's be real, women don't actually care about this, okay? No Not to be all doomer about it guys, but you know, people don't really care about the experiences of men. So, you know, the faster I would say that you recognize this as a reality and just move on, the better. Uh people don't listen, they don't care for the struggles of men. Um dating apps are complete poison for the vast majority of men. So, in my opinion opinion is just kind of best to uh to move on from that. But again, totally accurate, right? The experience of dating for the average guy is essentially just repeated rejections that are incredibly draining. So, you know, social media and stuff like this not uh not a fantastic move. You got a match. Just kidding. You've got a match. Just kidding. That doesn't feel good.

And it's not just apps. Liberation results in a lot of confusion. These are timelines. This is the revealed past conversation. That is when you let us get attached and then you drop all the dirt on yourself. The Guys, you got to you got to understand how funny this is. Okay? Because it's so accurate, right? Like go to this part here. Let's just say a woman tells you about her past. This is probably your interest level. Imme- immediately just plummets. And that's why guys, I'm telling you, that's why women lie about this stuff because if they don't, you're not going to be interested. You know, like if you knew, my goodness, man. If you knew the behavior of a lot of what the women are getting up to these days from the outset, which fortunately a lot of guys are becoming a bit more clued on to. But if you could actually just hear it instantaneously or visualize it or know what the woman was up to, your interest would would be here essentially anyway. Like it would just it would just be down in the dirt, guys, because so many of the women, it's like their experience with men is so drastically high that you can't date them. Like you are act- People think this is like a doomer take, but this is really quite uh close to reality, okay? If you if you try and date these women who have extensive dating histories with men, man, you are going to get cheated on. You are going to get treated terribly. You like you're going to get those text messages that you know, she's going to lie to you about falling asleep and stuff like that because she'll be at some ex-boyfriend's house or some ex-situationship's house or something like that. And there's a reason why men's interest plummets like this. Probably many of you guys watching this video right now can relate to this part of the chart right here where it just completely plummets. Like you'll think that a that a woman's a princess. Maybe you are like young and naive and you hear her past and you're like, oh damn, I'm not marrying that. You know what I mean? You're like, yeah, I'm going to just I'm just going to dip on out of here. I'll catch you later. And women clue on to this and this is why they lie to men about it, by the way. This is one of the big reasons. You let us get attached and then you drop all the dirt on yourself. This is like, I used to be a stripper, I've slept with 400 people, I had a threesome 2 days before I met you. And you don't know how men think, so you expect us to go, oh, it doesn't matter. I love you now. And it never works that way. It always works like you should have told me this here and then we would never have gotten here. And now I have to get rid of you.

I have been told I have a boyfriend or a husband 18 times. This one is the monkey branch. That's when we offer you something stable and you get bored after about 3 months and you bail out for a new guy. Oh, yeah, this is the best part. This is a This is a classic experience for men, guys, is you date a woman, you treat her well, you look after her and she gets bored and leaves you for some random guy. Now, the thing about this is I actually think this is a silver lining because, honestly, thank goodness you got rid of the woman. But this is so damn common, man. Like, I think so many dudes watching this video can relate to this experience. Like, you start treating a woman well, you know, you start providing for her, being what so what society tells you a real man is. Okay, you like step up and then the more you do this crap, the the worse the behavior becomes from the woman. And I actually think this has a really strong correlation, by the way, with um how many dudes the woman has been with. Like, if if a woman has been with 30 dudes, she'll get bored and unappreciative very damn quickly. Um compared to a woman who hasn't been with any guys, for example, it's going to be a lot easier for her to appreciate you. And this is one of the issues that men have is men like to feel appreciated. Okay? Men like to feel respected. They like to understand that there's gratitude there. Like no dude wants to provide and care about a woman who just thinks that's what men are supposed to do and treats you like garbage. But this this chart so accurate for men. This one happened to me a bunch of times before I even knew what was happening. And then girls started bailing on their boyfriends for me and I went, "Oh, that's why they were leaving. They found something else." And then that guy puts her in a situationship because she was just a time passer and she tries to come back. And that's like, "Hey, remember when we were dating? Well, I went and tried a bunch of guys I liked better and they were mean to me. You want to get married?" And Holy hell. How do How disgusting is this one, by the way? You know, I feel like this guy is just talking through the experiences that men have just back-to-back-to-back. But guys, I'm telling you, if you're a dude um and you're getting up there in age, you're you're an older fellow, you have probably received these messages from women as you've gotten older. Like let's just say you're some dude and you're like 29 and you've maybe gotten your career together or something like that. You're going to receive interest from women who used to never like you. And then they're going to be like, "Hey, remember me? Surely I can come into your life now. I've I've gone and I've dated all of these guys and now I'm ready to settle down because I know what I want." And dudes just look at these women and go, "Oh, hell no, man. Oh, hell no." Like do If you If you go out there, guys, and you talk to men in their 40s, they'll have plenty of these experiences for you. You know, because women typically they'll overlook the good guys. They'll overlook the guys who are stable, who would care about them, and that sort of thing. They'll go out there and have their fun. And then they'll try and come back before they hit 30 because they realize they need a stable family unit. And of course the men the men are like, well, I don't want to date that. Right? Like you never cared about me before, but now you care about me because you're running out of time. That's not how this works. And this is how you end up with so many women who are like 35 and they don't have children and they have cats instead. Like I'm not even trying to be mean, guys. That's literally how women get to that particular scenario. And you know, no. That's what leads to this situationship cycle. As a man, once you recognize these patterns, you just try not to get too attached to keep yourself even. And then there's just this cycle of women that show up and they say, "What are we?" And you say, "Just friends." And they leave and another one shows up and says, "What are we?" And you say, "Just friends." And they leave and the first one comes back.

So now I'm all famous and stuff. I got a lot of women in the DMs and they all say, "Oh, I would be the perfect wife. I would love you forever." And I don't believe them anymore. Yeah, I mean, as a guy you can't. You know? And that's that's the really sad part, man, is like you might be a guy who becomes successful. And this is what I was talking about a second ago. Let's just say you were to women, right? You were considered a nobody because maybe you didn't make enough money or maybe you weren't attractive enough. If down the line you make significantly more money or like you become a doctor or you look so much better now because you've been hitting the gym and you know, doing all of the things you can, like you're going to get interest from those women who treated you like trash previously. And the fact of the matter is a lot of them are not going to be very high quality at all. And it's crazy. It's absolutely crazy how that works. There's probably a bunch of you watching this video right now who can attest to exactly that experience. I just don't know what's going to happen here. We used to solve this problem by punishing this behavior. You would just be shamed out of society for trying to turn a situationship into a real thing cuz we know what it does, and couples would stay together.

I feel 98% confident that the first thing you're looking at is whether she's pretty, whether she's hot to you. So, no, it's not about how hot the girls are. It's not about measuring personality versus looks. It's that I need to be 98% sure that you're not married or a stripper or just passing time, and there's no longer any way to do that. Yeah, and that's the problem, right? It's like you have so many women who just absolutely lie about this. I have seen dudes who have been in marriages for like 10 years or 15 years, and then they find out horrible things about their wife. Like, let that sink in for a second, guys. Like, I'm not married, I'm not a married man, for example. I have no intention of getting married, but that would be so damn stressful. Like, imagine having this experience right here with the line going directly down indicating the man's interest. Imagine having that when you are in a marriage, man. A marriage of like 10 or 15 years, because what you understand is that the woman is not who you thought that she was.

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