Why some 'MARRIAGES' end in 'DIVORCE'

Matthew chapter 19, verse 3 to 10. I read from the Easy to Read.

Some Pharisees came to Jesus. They tried to make him say something wrong. They asked him, "Is it right for a man to divorce his wife for any reason he chooses?"

Jesus answered, "Surely you have read this in the scriptures. When God made the world, he made people male and female. And God said, 'This is why a man will leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two people will become one.' So they are no longer two but one. God has joined them together, so no one should separate them."

The Pharisees asked, "Then why did Moses give a command allowing a man to divorce his wife by writing a certificate of divorce?"

Jesus answered, "Moses has allowed you to divorce your wives because you refused to accept God's teaching. But divorce was not allowed in the beginning. I tell you that whoever divorces his wife, except for the problem of sexual sin, and marries another is guilty of adultery."

The followers said to Jesus, "If that is the only reason a man can divorce his wife, it is better not to marry."

Then I'll read also from Proverbs chapter 14, verse 1. Proverbs chapter 14, verse 1. I'll first of all read the Amplified version, and then we'll take a look at The Passion Translation.

Proverbs 14, verse 1, Amplified Bible. He says, "The wise woman builds a house on the foundation of godly precepts and her household thrives, but the foolish one who lacks spiritual insight tears it down with her own hands by ignoring godly principles."

Proverbs chapter 14, verse 1, The Passion Translation. "Every wise woman encourages and builds up her family, but a foolish woman, over time, will tear it down by her own actions."

Now, just like a very interesting phenomenon that has been captured by what is called the 80/20 principle, the 80/20 rule, the 80/20 pattern. It's been observed that in so many issues of life and dimensions of life, a few factors are far more dominant in having an influence in the overall results or overall outcome in any given circumstance, positive or negative. And it's quite interesting that even on this topic of why some marriages end in divorce, when you carry out a very, very comprehensive, very comprehensive search, you investigate, and then you also interrogate seasoned married counselors who have kept notes for 20, 30 years, 40 years in marriage counseling, speaking to some thousands of couples, some hundreds of couples.

By the time you collate the various reasons that have led to some couples eventually separating and breaking up in marriage, we could have about a hundred of them, a hundred of these reasons. Now, it's quite significant that when we took this search further, we discovered that about 20 factors are predominant and are responsible for more than 80%, in some instances 90%, of marriages that have ended up in divorce.

So, by the grace of God, as you listen carefully, I share with you these 20 major factors. Quickly, I run through these various reasons and factors. And number one of them is a life-threatening situation, assaults, and violent reactions. The couple's situations in a marriage where there are frequent physical assaults, frequent violent reactions.

Number two: Lack of brokenness, consistent disrespect, and contempt for your spouse. A second major reason why some marriages end up in divorce is as a result of lack of brokenness on the part of a couple, a spouse, or both in some instances. A consistent disrespect and contempt for your spouse. And under these factors, you see instances of inability of the couple, of the spouse's ability to apologize, which could be due to the attitude of self-justification, the attitude, the fact of stubbornness is a factor of pride. Pride has led to the break-off of many marriages. Stubbornness has led to the breakup of many marriages. Refusal to admit your mistakes, refuse to accept the right counsel or correction of a married counselor, refusal to implement the counsel of a married counselor, overbearing attitude. We have instances where some husbands want to relate with their wives like a master-servant relationship, like a master-servant relationship. These things are happening.

And then another factor is a disabled spirit. The disabled spirit. And for instance, when the wife that is so obviously manifesting the Jezebel spirit, she wants to rule the family contrary to the word of God. She wants to control. A disabled, the wife of the Jezebel spirit wants to control her husband. She wants to dictate and have the final say of every major thing that happens in the family, in the home.

And then consistent humiliation of your spouse, especially in the presence of third parties. When you see an instance, instances where the spouse will insult you, insult your spouse, you shout on your spouse, you walk out on your spouse, you ridicule your spouse in the presence of your children, in the presence of visitors, in the presence of all the people.

And then for the wives, refusal to respect your husband, refusal to submit to your husband has over time. You saw that in Proverbs 14, verse 1. He said, "by her actions over time." Over time has led to the breakup of many marriages.

And then consistent contempt for your spouse. No more appreciation of your spouse. Abuse or familiarity is now taken to incredible, you know, heights. You feel others, other wives, other women, other men, other husbands are far better than your spouse. You're always taking your spouse for granted. The husband, for instance, no longer, you know, expresses any form of admiration for his wife, no appreciation. Leave on little gifts and dates. I think of the past. Over time, over time, these things cause a lot of damage.

And then number three. Number three: Sex-related complaints. Sex-related complaints. And some common complaints under this factor are sexual starvation, inadequate sex, lack of sexual fulfillment, sexual frustration, hostile rejection of the sexual preferences of your spouse, and then using sex as a weapon of strife.

And number four: Frequent verbal abuse and use of hurting words. Frequent verbal abuse and use of hurting words. When in a marriage, there's so much, there's frequent shouting, issuing threats. Either the husband or the wife is always issuing threats, cursing your spouse, frequent nagging, frequent criticism, spiteful comparison of your husband or wife with other men, with other women, or with their peers. These are issues that over time cause a lot of damage and in some instances have led to the breakup of some marriages.

And then number five: No regard for God and God's word. When you have instances where the husband, the husband that is not God-fearing. Unfortunately, the husband was assumed to be a believer, assumed to be a Christian. Was actually, in most instances, even met in the church in the first place. A wife that is not God-fearing. And when a man, or what a woman, or man is not God-fearing, a husband or wife is not God-fearing, certain things begin to play out. For instance, on repentant indulgence in certain ungodly acts. You see the man committing adultery, and he has no, you know, he doesn't have any sense of remorse or repentance. He doesn't. It makes it even over yours and threatens the wife to do whatever she likes. That is obviously an ungodly man talking. Utter disregard for the counsel of the marriage counselors. There are many instances where couples will eventually go to married counselors, and whatever the marriage counselor has advised, the husband will refuse to comply. The wife will refuse to comply. And these are things that happen when the husband is just a churchgoer and not a true believer. When the woman or the wife is just a churchgoer and not a true believer.

And I must read the scripture one more time. Share this scripture with you to just highlight one or two attributes of, of, uh, an example of a godless or a godly spouse. And I take that from Matthew chapter 1, verse 18 to 24. Matthew chapter 1, verse 18 to 24, Easy to Read version. "The birth of Jesus the Messiah. This is how the birth of Jesus the Messiah happened. His mother Mary was engaged to marry Joseph, but before the marriage, he learned that she was expecting a baby. She was pregnant by the power of the Holy Spirit. Mary's husband Joseph was a good man." Now, there's a reason why he was qualified as a good man. "He did not want to cause her public disgrace." That's an attribute of a good man, a good husband. That's an attribute of a good woman, a good wife. So he planned to divorce her secretly. But after Joseph thought about this, an angel from the Lord came to him in a dream. The angel said, 'Joseph, son of David, don't be afraid to accept Mary to be your wife. The baby inside her is from the Holy Spirit. She will give birth to his son. You will name him Jesus. Give him that name because it will save his people from their sins.' All this happened to make clear the full meaning of what the Lord said through the prophet: 'The virgin will be pregnant and will give birth to a son. They will name him Emmanuel.' Emmanuel means 'God with us.' When Joseph woke up, he did what the Lord's angel told him to do. He married Mary."

See, in Joseph, the husband of Mary, the mother of Jesus, you'll find attributes of a God-fearing man, a God-fearing man or a God-fearing woman. Respect has very high regards for anything that she's convinced, he's convinced is the mind of God on an issue. A God-fearing man, a God-fearing woman does not engage in premarital sex. And so, if you are one of those young men now, you are not yet married, and you have even gone to the point of insisting that somebody you are interested in must sleep with you before you would take your marital plans, without serious. My friend, you are not a true believer. You may love God, but you don't fear God. And unfortunately, in this present times, we have a lot of people today who love God, but they don't fear God. And so we have a perceived revival that is without repentance. And there cannot be genuine revival without repentance.

I want every single sister, I want every single brother, one of the biggest mistakes you can make in your choice in marriage is to get married to a woman or a man that does not have any sincere fear of God, a sincere regard for God, sincere regard for the word of God. And there are ways, signs you used to know them. How does he treat the word of God? How does she treat the word of God? How does he treat ministers of God? A man that has no respect for pastors, including his own pastor, does not have the fear of God. A woman that has no respect for pastors, including her own pastor, is not a God-fearing woman.

Another thing you see about this man, Joseph. Joseph knew how to discern divine communication. He knew the different avenues through which God speaks. He understood that one of the ways God can speak, even though it is rare, is by sending an angel. And at any time God goes to the extent of sending an angel, then that message from God is very, very serious and must be obeyed. And then interestingly, the angel told him, "You will name this child Jesus." It didn't entrust you to know that Joseph was not first, was not compelled any further to name that child Jesus. When the time came, he noted everything that God has spoken, and he obeyed everything God has said. When he woke up, he went ahead to marry Mary.

I pray for every eligible single man or woman listening to this message that is truly God-fearing, that may the Lord bless you with a God-fearing spouse in the name of Jesus Christ.

And then number six: External influences. Another major reason why some marriages end in divorce is as a result of external influences. On due interference of the father-in-law, the mother-in-law, the father of the husband, the father of the wife, the mother of the husband, the mother of the wife, undue interference of close siblings, close friends, bad advisors. Accepting when you accept a couple, husband or wife, begin to accept counsel from the wrong people. Taking your marital issues or complaints to friends and family members instead of a pastor or married counselors is a doorway for so much damage to happen to that marriage. And because, among other reasons, one of the disadvantages of reporting your marital issues to close, uh, relatives is that when even when the couple will reconcile, no matter how bad, whatever was the issue that happened, when they eventually reconcile, the close relatives, in most instances, majority of them remain embittered. They remain hostile to their brother, to that son or daughter-in-law.

And then number seven: Another major reason why marriage, some marriages end in divorce is adultery, is a factor of adultery and emotional infidelity. In the times past, when social media had not come into, um, into play, the factor of emotional fidelity was not as serious as it has become today. In fact, today, it's virtually at par with the issue of adultery itself. And that is as a result of the fact that a lot of the acts of emotional infidelity are transacted through the mediums of social media and your phone. Having a child from another woman or from another man outside wedlock, exposure of the true paternity of a child, or even the children, or some of the children. When these things happen, it has led in many instances to the breakup of such marriages.

And I must also try to put in a word here on emotional infidelity. It is the act of a married man or a married woman flirting with another man or woman, but without physical touch, without physical romance, or sexual intercourse with the person. And we're going to see that in some other instances, it begins to actually delve into physical touch, delve into physical romance, and what is just left that has not happened is sexual, sexual intercourse itself. Flirting with the opposite sex, true verbal or written comments of messages, love messages, seductive messages, flirting through prolonged or late phone calls, flirting through frequent social media chats. As I'm speaking right now, the spirit of God is speaking to the conscience of certain husbands, speaking to the conscience of certain wives who, as I speak right now, you still have the trust of your spouse. And the spirit of God is saying this: Whatever you are doing secretly, the day it is eventually exposed, it's going to be a new chapter, a very bitter chapter in that marriage. So stop it now. Stop it now. That is one of the reasons why this message is coming. And we have instances where, you know, emotional infidelity gets to a point where, which is now happening more, even as a result of some of the social media mediums and channels available, you see a husband or a wife sending their nude pictures, exposing their physical nakedness to some other woman, to some other man, different from his or her spouse. And we have also seen situations where a woman, perhaps in the workplace, she has, you know, she's flirting with someone in her workplace. She would deliberately wear revealing clothes from home to her workplace, and she's doing that having that particular man in mind.

And then number eight: Inability to bear children or a male child.

And then number nine: Excessive bitterness, an unforgiving spirit. This has caused a lot of damage. In fact, when Jesus was speaking in Matthew chapter 19, he made reference to this issue. He said, "Moses, for the hardness, because of the hardness of your heart." Because of the hardness of your heart. So much bitterness, unforgiving spirit is locked up in the heart, in the spirit, in the minds of certain husbands, certain wives, and is causing so much damage. And ultimately, it has led to the breakup of many marriages. You see such husbands or wives always revisiting past scenes, offenses, mistakes, keeping malice with your spouse for days, for weeks, for months, in some instances for years. Talk to married counselors, they will tell you that they have records of a couple, a husband or wife keeping malice with a spouse for years, consistently taking very mean or hostile actions towards your spouse. In fact, it's so bad that in some, we've seen cases where the husband actually finds joy in the pains and challenges of his own wife. We've seen cases where a wife that is supposed to be a nurse, that is supposed to be, you know, a point, an instrument of encouragement to the husband, finds so much joy and happiness in the pains and challenges of her own husband. Things are happening in marriages.

And then number 10: Wrong values. Lack of proper understanding of God's major purpose for marriage. And this is actually a major issue even with the young, the youth of today. There are so many young men and young women who are looking forward to getting married. Some are even desperate to get married, but they have different motivations. You find instances where, you know, a young couple or younger man or woman is not even forthcoming for marriage counseling classes. And all they think about is the glamour. They will spend hours planning for the wedding day, and they cannot spend one or two hours listening to marriage counselors that are meant to teach them what it takes to succeed in marriage. Wrong values. And there's an increase in this realm. This present generation. In this present generation, we see more husbands and wives placing career success above marriage and family, blessing, financial gains, fame above marriage and family. And one of those things you notice that a spouse with wrong values would be ready to forsake his or her marriage for a job, a better job, forsake his or her marriage for career advancement, for financial gains, or even relocation to a very distant location. They will accept it, even when they know that relocation is going to affect and destroy their marriage.

And then number 11: Lack of wholehearted commitment to the marriage. Lack of wholehearted commitment to the marriage. Today, we find this happening a lot. A lot of husbands are not committed to that marriage, to their wife, to the family, and vice versa for many wives. And when this happens, you begin to see certain things playing out. When there's no commitment, the husband or the wife would not be ready or willing to pay the price of keeping a happy marriage. There's a price to pay to make your husband happy. So in such a context, there'll be refusal to do those things to make a wife happy in marriage. They'll be refused, a deliberate refusal to do those things that will make a husband happy in marriage. A husband or wife that does not place high value on marriage would always be considering separation or divorce at the slightest of friends. He's always talking about it, she's always planning for it. Long, long, long, long before it ever happens. And in this present time, you find a couple that just married, got married six months ago, three months ago, and the young man, the husband, the other wife is already talking about separation. He's already talking about divorce. Six months into marriage, one year into marriage.

And number 12: Spiritual attacks. Lack of proper personal deliverance before the marriage. We strongly advise every Christian to ensure that you go for a proper personal deliverance in a ministry that is given to deliverance administration. And then for peace to reign, we also advise that every intended couple should go for a personal deliverance together. Let that man witness your own deliverance, and let the lady witness your deliverance. Go for it in a deliverance ministry that the two of you have believed in what they are doing. I believe this will save a lot of undue suspicions and issues and even save a lot of spiritual attacks in the season of marriage. Because when these spiritual attacks against marriages can come, you know, when there's an unbroken, the existence of an unbroken marriage, cast, anti-marriage cast, attacks because they are attacks from an existing cast, an existing spell, an existing yoke, sometimes from the paternal, maternal family of the husband, or paternal, maternal family of the wife. If you dig deeper, you discover that what is happening has happened before in the marriages of some others in that man's family or the woman's family. It could be due to spiritual attacks or demonic oppression against the marriage. The husband or the wife. The instances where the husband is still, you know, in captivity spiritually, or the wife is in captivity spiritually, and that opens the door for attacks to that marriage.

And number 13: Lack of trust, possessive jealousy, and frequent allegations. Lack of trust, possessive jealousy, and frequent allegations. This is another major issue. And when this is played out, you see instances of wrong accusations of emotional infidelity, wrong accusations of sexual infidelity, or it could be strong suspicion of emotional or sexual infidelity. Sometimes the accusation could come in the url of demonic or cultic or fetish involvement, or it could be strong suspicions of witchcraft or demonic possession of either the husband or the wife. And when this begins to happen, it will have some consequences in the way, for instance, you are going to see a situation where there are strong suspicions that the husband or the wife, or children's challenge or misfortune is due to the suspected spouse's demonic activities. And when this begins to happen, and it's not truly the real reason, then of course, it's going to lead to some damage eventually. And we found out that feelings of strong suspicion could sometimes be due to excessive jealousy or spiritual essences. I please want to advise that we'll be careful about about the way we'll accept every dream that we have or dreams that people claim they had. Not all dreams are from God. And I can tell you today that one issue that is also causing a lot of confusion and damage to a lot of Christians and believers are is the issue of supposed revelation, supposed revelations. A lot of people are claiming to have heard things from God that God never said. People are acting based on things that people claimed some other person claimed to have heard from God that God never said. And it could be really bad when you are acting on the revelation about your spouse, and that revelation is actually false. It is either a deception from the pit of hell, or it is not just from God, and it may be coming out of the abundance of your imaginations.

And then number 14: Loneliness and frequent absence of your spouse has in some instances led to the breakup of some marriages. Abandonment of your spouse. Abandonment of your spouse for so long.

And then number 15: Lack of love, care, lack of love, care, and support. Lack of love, care, and support. Lack of care for the spouse, no sincere support from your spouse during his or trials. Deliberate indifference to your spouse's health challenges. Your wife is going to have battling with some health challenge, and you don't care. You don't even comfort her. Your husband is attending to some personal health issues, you don't care. And people outside are the ones now attending to your husband.

And then number 16: Pretence and insincerity. Deliberate conception of a major secret before the marriage has affected a lot of marriages. For instance, you were married before, but you concealed it. You already had a child before marriage, but you concealed it. You had a major health issue before marriage, you concealed it. You had a major sexual challenge before marriage, you concealed it. You deliberately lied about your blood genotype. You lied on some. We've seen instances where the man or the woman went to the extent of generating a fake certificate from some hospital or clinic or lab showing a blood genotype that is different from his. Frequent lies, so much deception by the husband, by the wife. A spouse that never keeps to promises and agreements, even when they eventually have the resources, they have the time, they have the opportunity to fulfill it. These are some of the burning issues.

And then number 17: Religion and faith-based issues. I, I want to advise the man, I want to advise husbands to please take note of this factor: hindering your spouse from spiritual fellowship. You see, this factor takes time. It takes time, and it can be very dangerous. When you know a husband or a wife is God-fearing, and then whatever is an issue in the marriage, the husband feels that God is on his side, and the wife feels that God is on her side, towards taking a drastic action. So this plays out when a woman is denied, a wife is denied the opportunity of going to church as often as she ought to, serving God in church, rising up to certain extent she could have risen in terms of leadership and ministry. It begins to burn. It begins to burn over time, and eventually could lead to a surprise decision. And when such actions are taken, that man or woman has the impression that God is with them. They have the impression that they are very, very right in that decision they have decided to take. So when you hinder your spouse from fulfilling his or her calling, compelling your spouse to convert to a different faith after marriage. Never forget that your spouse refused to get married to men of that particular faith before marriage. Your husband refused to get married to women from that denomination of faith before marriage. And so when after marriage, you had agreements even on choice of faith, this kind of thing happens. It can cause a lot of damage thereafter. And then when you see instances where the husband or the wife secretly begins to engage in fetish or cultic practices contrary to the pre-marriage stand on such issues, ultimately that can also lead to breakup of a marriage as well.

Begin to round it up now. Number 18: Finance-related issues. And under these, we have issues like inability to provide the basic needs of the family, fees, accommodation, bills, basic health bills, feeding allowance for the family. Then there are issues like financial irresponsibility. This is very, very provoking. And when it persists for too long, over some time, over years, it could lead to some undesirable final outcome, which is the topic of discussion today. And then there are instances where the husband or the wife is just the sole financier of every bill and expense in that home. Even when the husband is going through some challenges, there is no support from the wife. Even when that wife is now going through some serious challenges, the husband still continues, you know, to leave everything in the hands of a woman. These are some of the finance-related complaints.

And then number 19: Impatience and fair-weather attitude. Oh, we are seeing this play out more than ever before. And so today, we can see a couple that got married a year ago, six months ago, two years ago, have broken up, and it's all over. And what are the issues? Nothing uncommon. The same issues that couples that have been married for 60 years battled with, and even that issue was happened for them in a more grievous dimension. So there's so much, when there's so much impatience in your relationship with your spouse, when you begin to put undue pressure on your spouse on different issues, when you begin to threaten to quit the marriage when certain needs, certain expectations or desires changes, even in the life of your spouse, does not happen at your time or in some instances at your deadline. Because there are instances where the husband will give the wife a deadline, threatening that if something doesn't happen by that deadline, the marriage is over. We've seen instances where the wife will give her own husband a deadline, threatening that if he doesn't do certain things at that time, the marriage is over. Impatience, fair-weather attitude. When you go into a marriage based on financial consideration, based on financial attraction, the moment the point, the real point of attraction is no longer there, and that persists over a long time, you are going to see such a wife or such a husband begin to find the exit door.

And then the last one. A lot of marriages have also broken up due to deliberately concealed reasons. Yes, deliberately concealed reasons. Some of the men or women you see you find today who are separated, who are divorced, the reasons they give you and they give publicly for breaking up their marriage is not the real reason. When the real reason for for those breaks, seeking to break up the marriage is a reason they will be ashamed to tell people. There are some who have left their wives because he found out from their visits to many doctors and the clinics that the inability to have children is coming from her. The problem is with her. Now, such a husband, if he is very active in church, committed, supports committed Christian, if he's so determined to now get another wife because of that reason, he's certainly such a husband would never tell people. He would never tell people that he's putting aside his wife and his former, his first marriage because she could not have a child, because he knows that that's such a reason will attract a lot of sympathy towards the wife, would provoke a lot of anger against him. So he will conceal the real reason and look for some other reason that is acceptable to people and profess that as the real, as the issue with his wife.

We have also seen situations where a wife is so money-minded or has other considerations, and for that reason, she wants to leave her husband. But she's not going to tell. A wife who is a Christian, has been in church, is active in church, cannot start telling other believers and friends and family that I want to leave my husband because he's not very wealthy as I thought he will be. So she would look for a reason that is acceptable to people, not just any reason, but a reason that is acceptable to people. And that is where something very dangerous, which is happening now, begins to play out in some instances. Not all cases. There are actually cases where the husband sets up the wife. We have seen situations where the wife sets up the husband. They have found some reasons very acceptable to the public as a good ground for calling off your marriage. One of them is a life-threatening situation. Husbands and wives, I found that at the moment you tell people, "I left my marriage because it was, uh, my life was at stake," you win sympathy instantly. And so, one dangerous trend happening now is that in some instances, you'll find a situation where someone will stage-manage such a scenario to play out against the spouse. But one thing I want to let everyone listening to me here understand, including those who are still thinking of doing this, there is a God who sits in heaven. Every secret thing is known to Him. Even the deepest thoughts of your hearts are known to Him. And I will advise you that if for any reason you even have to quit, don't call white black in order to live white. Don't discredit a good woman in order to divorce her. Don't scandalize your husband publicly. But the reason you have generated, when that husband is God-fearing and a good man, it's going to affect you subsequently.

I close by emphasizing a discovery we made. And what is that discovery? We found out that the top 10 reasons why women, that women consider as a basis for divorce, are different, slightly different from the top 10 reasons that men are more sensitive to when it comes to the issue of separation and divorce. In this closing five minutes, I'll quickly just highlight them. Most women and wives are very sensitive to these issues: One, no, when there's no regard for God and God's word. Two, life-threatening situation, physical assaults, and violent reactions. Three, women and wives are very sensitive to the issue of external influences, external interference in their marriage. And then there are other issues like spiritual attacks, wrong values, inability to bear children or a male child, excessive bitterness and unforgiving spirit, lack of wholehearted commitment to the marriage, lack of trust, possessive jealousy, and false allegations, and then lack of love, care, and support. Women are very, very sensitive to these issues.

Then on the other hand, most men, and husbands, so the wife should take note of this now, just as I expect the men to have noted those 10 issues I just mentioned about the women, what they are most sensitive to. For men, it starts with number one: Lack of brokenness, consistent disrespect, and contempt of your spouse. Contempt for your spouse. Now, if you are a wife, and your husband is consistently complaining that you are not broken, that you are stubborn, you are proud, your husband is always complaining of disrespect, that you're treating with contempt, that is a time bomb. It is a time bomb. Because men, we found out that men are very sensitive to this issue. And I think one of the things that will even give a lot of weight to it is that God now emphasized it. Ephesians chapter 5, verse 22 to 33. God emphasized that the aspect of respect for your husband, as well as he emphasized the aspect of love for your wife.

And then the second factor, the men are very concerned about sex-related issues, sex-related complaints. So every wise woman cannot downplay the complaints of your husband over sexual matters.

And then number three: Frequent verbal abuse and use of hurting words. Now, take note, we have found that this number three is the equivalent, almost like an equivalent of physical assault. So while the wives so much detest a husband that physically abuses them, the same way husbands strongly detest a wife that frequently abuses him and uses hurting words against him.

And then there are other issues for the men like life-threatening situations, physical assaults and violent reactions, no regard for God's word and God's regard for God and God's word, adultery and emotional infidelity. The men are particular about it. Inability to bear children or a male, lack of trust, possessive jealousy, and frequent false allegations, external influences, finance-related complaints. Hallelujah.

Now, I believe that if only we can have genuine believers, young men and young women who fear God, we also have men and women who are broken. Because there is so much self-will, so much stubbornness, so much pride in this present generation. Because when you are humble, you will accept what the Lord is saying, what the Spirit of God is saying, what marriage counselors are saying, and you will adjust.

I want to plead with every husband that just listened to this message to please take everything you have heard today as a message from the Lord. I want to plead with every wife that has had to this message to take everything you have heard today as a message from the Spirit of God. I want to give this message to every father, every mother. And as I'm speaking right now, the Spirit of God is emphasizing to me about mothers that every mother should be, should be conscious of everything mentioned in this message. And when the Spirit of God begins to talk about mothers and not talking about wives, then that implies that a lot of marriages have been negatively affected through the influence of the mother-in-law, through the influence, the negative influence and interference of the husband's mother or the wife's mother. And I know this can, you know, instances where all the, the son is like the mom's favorite or the only, the only child. It could be a major issue.

And I also want to encourage every single that has listened to this message to please put aside pretence. Stop asking God to give you a good man, a good woman, when you have not first of all adjusted to the obvious things that need to be corrected in your own life and character. It is very clear. Marriage is a big blessing. Marriage is a big blessing.

On this note, wherever you are listening, lift our good hands as we pray. Our Father, that God, with you all things are possible, even that which was completely written off. The same way you raised Lazarus from the dead after four days in the tomb, we know you are able to revive and restore. Lord, we pray for every marriage that has been battered, that is at a very, very toxic level, toxic state right now. The Lord intervene and bring about a supernatural turnaround, bring about deliverance, bring about healing, bring about conviction to the heart of the husbands, the heart of the wives, and let healing come to that home. Every child, every son, every daughter that has been crying to you, Lord, for the real restoration of their parents' marriage, Father, answer their prayer today in the name of Jesus. And I pray that the grace of the Lord come upon you, the wisdom of God, supernatural grace to adjust, supernatural grace to tolerate things you still need to tolerate for a while, because there are some negative things you see today that will not be forever. With time, they will fade away. So you need the grace to tolerate today. God give you more grace. The Lord increase your capacity for patience, to express and exercise patience with your spouse and family. The Lord bring healing and restoration to every home, to every family in the name of Jesus.

And we also pray against every spiritual attack that is currently manifesting, affecting certain marriages. Any area of your life, including your marriage, that is under spiritual attack, the Lord terminate such evil attacks in the name of Jesus. Any curse working against your marriage, the Lord break that curse. Any spell working against your marriage, the Lord break that spell. Any spiritual captivity in your life, in the life of your spouse, affecting even your marriage and family, the Lord set loose, set you loose from that captivity, set your spouse loose from that captivity in the name of Jesus. For your sake, the Lord bring deliverance to every member of your family. Any yoke of financial problems, any yoke of childlessness, any yoke of unfruitfulness affecting your family, your marriage, the Lord break that yoke in the name of Jesus. Every good thing certain people have sworn will never happen in your marriage, will never happen in your family, the Lord silence those forces and the Lord release that good thing unto you and your family today. Let the Most High God hear you say a powerful amen. It shall be so in the name of Jesus. The Lord bring peace, the Lord restore love, the Lord restore trust, the Lord restore sanity, the Lord restore prosperity unto that relationship, onto that marriage, unto that home and family in the name of Jesus.

And we pray for every eligible single listening to this message. The hand of the Lord touch you right now to perfect the transformation of your life and character, which He has already started. Any attribute in your character that would have become a problem in your time in marriage, the Lord Almighty deal with it now in the name of Jesus. Receive character transformation by the purifying Spirit of the Most High God. And we pray that the Lord will bless every God-fearing, transformed, eligible single with a God-fearing and transformed spouse in the name of Jesus. Thank you, Heavenly Father, in Jesus' mighty name, we have prayed. Amen.

If you believe God has spoken truly to you today, honor Him where you are right now with a clap of praise. Celebrate the Spirit of God, the Spirit of wisdom for ministering to you, your spouse, and your family. And I encourage you, please share this message to as many, as many married persons as possible. Share this message to as many eligible singles as possible, and God will bless you as you do so in Jesus' name. Keep in touch with us. Jesus Evangelical Assembly, the House of Answered Prayers.