Transcription
What's up, y'all? You're tuned in to Mental Groove, and today we're checking out another straight-up classic from Kevin Samuels. Trust me, this one's about to get interesting. Before we dive in, make sure to like, subscribe, and stick around. My thoughts are coming right after the clip. Let's jump in.
Hi. Hello. How are you? Ready? I'm good. How are you? I'm good. Appreciate it. How old are you? I'm 27. All right. People have talked about my headphones, but understand something. It's easier for me to hear sometimes. 27. So, are you single or are you married? I'm single. And when I heard you say 27, start now or put yourself on sale, I was like, 27. You don't Time to sell. Any children? Any children? Yes. Yes. I was a young girl who I have an eight-year-old. I had her at 19. Eight year old. Yes. Okay. Uh, I'll come back to this in a minute. Sure. But when it comes to dating, what are the what are your rules for kissing, first touch, and then sex? So, I just started my walk in faith. So, sex. No, we're not getting there until, you know, until what? Marriage basically is what I'm trying to plan on dying alone. Stop. Really? Go ahead. You You got your walking face. So sex is not gonna happen to marry. Go ahead. So I mean intimacy. Um what about K? What about then kissing and then first touch? So kissing. Yes. You have to have you know some type of Sorry, let me move with this service. Um you have to show some affection. I mean, we are women. We are affectionate right. I'm Guatemalan. I'm very That's what I've been told prior. like I'm very affectionate. I'm very sweet. Of course, you know, we give them their but when it comes right down to it, you can kiss, but it's not going anywhere, right? Okay. So, what what state do you live in? California. Okay. Please explain to the men why you believe this makes sense that a man should have to wait to have sex with you until after you're married. I'm good question. If they're a believer, they'll get it. If they're not, I mean, church is like, "I'm a believer. I'm a believer." But when did you when did you start your faith walk? After Halloween 2021. So, as a believer born, you can't It's hard to tell people that when you got a whole nine-year-old, right? And then that's what I that's what I say. I'm not like, I walk in faith. You have to wait for me. I already did my damage. I did my dues. I mean, like you said, I'm not like the typical 22-year-old that's single and no kids, you know? I come with baggage. I mean, right. It is what it is. You come with baggage, child, and then you expect somebody to wait until you're married to have sex. Right. Please, explain to explain to the men why this makes sense. And you Yes, you're so right. When I say it out loud, I'm like, "Okay, girl, calm down." Like, you're up here. Bring it down here. Totally get it. I feel like it's it's um it'll How can I explain to a man why I wouldn't say, "Hey, I'm waiting till marriage." because that's like that's just it scares someone off. No, you need to you need to see direct, right? Right. Because then that's I'm leading him on or stringing him along. Right. That's true. Um I feel like it's a case by case basis. Honestly, I I should I should wait till marriage. Am I I haven't crossed that line yet. But you're you're trying to wait till marriage. Trying keyword. No, no. I mean, I am a very affectionate person. Sorry, it's like loading. I don't know. Okay. Are you not a very affectionate person? Are you going to how how you going to get your man off until he get married? You know, I know I have Mormons who don't have uh sex, but they should have sex. I have clients who are Mormons and as long as there's no highman penetration, but what what is a man supposed to do? Because you gota understand something. You're a whole woman and you sitting up there with a whole child and a man can see that you had sex, right? And he's got to pay for that. Yeah. Yeah. And you're sitting back saying, "Oh, you can't have this until afterwards." And he's going to say, "Okay, well, what's your ex-husband's name?" The pest died. No, I'm just kidding. No, you're right. Yeah, I mean, it's I'm that's Yeah, that's basically it. I'm not I'm hoping I can wait. Obviously, I'm just going to tell you right now, you need to go ahead and scrap that. It's true. I mean, I I do I did my due diligence and Well, you guys mean when you ladies do this, basically what it sounds to men is though, I'm going to put God between you and my vagina so I make better decisions. How about you just pick better? Yeah. Well, he was a great guy. I left him cuz I was young and naive and thought, "Oh, what's out there? This is great." You know, he was a provider, lover, had a ring, everything. But I was the one. Hold on. Cuz I want to get married once. Where's he at? Oh, he's in the picture. He's He's with a girl now. And um great guy. Still involved. Helps, you know. No, he's not married. He he went downhill after I left him. Poor guy. had it. We were young. And this is why I was telling when I was talking to Jessica Wong. I'm like, we ask women about relationships and we hear women talk about they're so afraid of relationships because men in cheating and abuse. And I put up the stats showing that women cheat the same way to men cheat and women are not worse. If not worse, y'all are worse. You younger women are far worse. Oh no. This little angel face horrible. That's why I was like, I need to stop doing that. So, so why are you so why do you think you can go out to the marketplace and say, "Well, now because I I mess I've totally messed in other situations, I want you to wait." I never tried it. I said I wanted But why even try it though? My question. True, true. And I I watched Yes, I graduated. I have a my AA. A what? My I have my AA in what? Uh business. Okay. Glen, what what's your profession? Well, um so I was in the medical field in the plastic surgeon's office, but my daughter goes to private school and Oh, um just admin now. And you live in LA? I live in LA. Yes. Baby girl, you're a you're admin in LA. Well, it it's like uh now I'm a school dire school assistant director. A private school assistant director. Uhhuh. Middle class. And then Yes. And then weekends I do hair. Okay. Um maybe you're nervous. Yes. But right now it's sounding like um you're pricing yourself out of the market. I'm pricing myself? Yeah. I mean, because you you have an associates degree and you're you're clerical admin. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. So not an exceptionally high earner. Um and then you do hair on the side, right? To men it's like okay what is what is a woman's leverage? Um, so you can't leverage what a lot of women will try to leverage is a a career, right? Got a job, you got a daughter. Um, do you want to have more kids? Um, only if I, you know, have my partner and he wants a kid. Yes. If not, no. The partner, my husband. I don't see. You don't make sense. I personally do not want more children. If my partner wants But but you just said your faith won't was What is that a partner? It's a husband. Well, I thought partner meant like husband. I thought No, it doesn't. No, no, no, man. It doesn't. See, if you're a Christian, words mean things. Oh, remember it's only October. I'm a newbie. Okay. But but but my point is you you sound you're talking like a modern woman. It's like a what? A modern woman who just found Christianity, which is fine, but you're saying everything that's going to make you end up alone. Partner, no. Partner, that means you have business partners. Husband and wife or roles. Husband. Okay. But the most important thing, you don't want children. I'm not I'm not like saying no. Ma'am, a woman who wants to be married needs to understand that men who want to be married, our primary motivation for marriage is legacy. Right. 100%. So, you need to understand how backwards you are. You're coming with another man's legacy and the next man can't have sex and then can't have a kid. Are you on drugs? No. I'm not saying I can't. I mean, I won't. As a as a single young lady, heck no. Obviously, I don't want to, you know, baby daddy. No. If I when I we're going to change that. When I get married, I will definitely I'll have three. No. Have you had the No. No. Are you a mentally a wife today? Am I what? Are you Are you a wife? You don't get You don't get married and become a wife. You're a wife first. Mentally, I'm preparing myself. I read my Bible study. Bible. The Bible ain't going to do it. No, no, not not the Bible. I'm I'm in a women's Bible group. Would No, I don't I don't get your question. Were you raised to be a wife? You know what? No. Okay. My I No. Okay. So, you weren't raised to be a wife and it sounds to me like you're just trying to figure it out. Day by day. But but you don't understand what men who would be husbands want. We don't want women telling us what we can't do. And we don't want we don't want women saying that. Well, I mean, your decisions, every everything I'm every decision I've asked you about is a fear-based decision. I asked you, "Do you want more kids?" And the assumption is after you're married. You're like, "Well, only if my partner." All right. If you don't get married, man, you've already pretty much put yourself in a position. No, let's fix it. Have you Have you had any uh Have you had any um therapy? No. I think you should look into it. I want to. I really do because I mean cuz I mean I'm not trying to be disrespectful, but for 27 and a nine with a mother with a woman with a nine-year-old, I'm getting kind of very youthful vibes from you. And I I get you might be I get you might be nervous, but you're almost 30 years old and you're talking about you want to be married one day and and oftent times people turn to God hoping God will fix it. That's not how it works. Faith without works today. You could be in a church. You can be in a woman's group. But a wife is a role. And what is a one what does a wife's role what do you think what do you think a role of a wife is what does a wife do for a husband a helper I feel um I feel that they should they're you know the heart of the home they love um I mean mainly they follow their husband I mean obviously They don't want just a nagger and all that stuff. Like when you said youthful, I get it. We'll get back to I'm asking a question. What is the role of a wife? Oh, helper. Lover. Um, helper. Lover. You got me. Um, a friend like a help. Go ahead. Helper, lover, and what else? And a friend, supporter, motivator. So just by that answer, it shows it tells me you have not put any thought into what a wife is. That's a really that's a very generic Yeah. Okay. You're right. So, when I say you're not a wife, it's you're not putting any thought into it. You weren't raised to be a wife and you're 27. Okay. And you got a nine-year-old. You don't So, if you don't know what a wife is, what is a husband's role? Oh, I haven't. I mean, I believe you've said it. You know, the protector, uh, a leader, uh, provider. um you know the head of the household. Um I mean, it's bas. Go ahead. Was your child's father then? All of it. Yeah. And you Yeah. I was young and naive and I was like what makes you think you get another chance? Because I've been honestly I I mean I've come across great men and again I've done the same thing where I'm like oh but there's more. But that was me being you know what what if you're out of chances. We have to find out. I don't want to. Um I don't know. I I don't know. Then how you going to survive? Survive as in Yeah. If you're out of chances because I don't know why women today feel like men are an unlimited resource. Like you get Oh, I know. But but you've already had a whole man who wanted to marry you when you had a kid and you use this young excuse, which is in my opinion [ __ ] It's I was 19. I don't care. Yeah, I was. I don't care. Women have gotten married at 19. It's [ __ ] No. Right. Right. Right. No, no. You should have been you could have married that man. He wanted to marry you. Okay. And he probably run into other super men. What if you're out of options? And my question is a man has to a man of value has to want to marry you and you have to be a wife. So uh you can want it, but you're not even ready for it. He don't even know where a wife is. So let's go down the path. Focus. It's going down the path. When you hit 60, when you hit 55 years old and you're still unmarried, man. Oh. Oh my goodness. I don't I never thought that far. No, but you were right. I don't know the role of a wife. I I didn't I wasn't raised in that home. So, that's something that I'm taking upon myself now at 55 years old and unmarried. I know. I can't even think. Why do you keep making these faces and doing this? I mean, man, because I'm very expressive. That's how water balls out. Okay, but it's not that's not helping you. It's It's very youthful. That's what I get all the time that stop it. You should stop. But why? I don't want to be you too. That's immature. It's it's it's juvenile. You're somebody's mother, right? So, I'm telling you, not from a mean place, but it's not helping you. It doesn't make you come across as somebody who's serious, right? That Yes. But I know how to act like when I'm in the school. I know how to act when I'm in a You're on You're on a platform in front of millions of people. Right. But I thought, you know, we're having a conversation. Stop. Stop. Tell me just to stop because if you don't know when if you don't know when it's inappropriate. Okay, let me get on task. At 55. If you're unmarried at 55. Uh, no. Well, ma'am, what's the question? If I'm married at 55, if I'm unmarried at 55, what how you going to pay for yourself for the rest of your life, man? Because if you're not you're not you're not a wife today. You don't know what a wife is. You don't know what a wife does to a husband. You don't want to have any more children. So, guess what, ma'am? men don't listen co when I ask you for a response. Listen because apparently you didn't get taught this stuff. Okay. So listen, how much money do you think you're going to need to retire on to live between the ages of 65 and 85? How much cash do you think you will need at 65 to last you for 20 years? That is a good question. I have not thought of that. I don't know what the, you know, the mortgage prices will be at that time, but I remember you 20 years of life. I mean, I could be in a senior home. I mean, I don't care, man. 20 years of life. Don't Don't Google it, man. Ma'am, stop. Jesus Christ. No, I ask somebody. You're like, man, 20 years of you have like ADHD or something? I'm not. Okay. Are you on medication? No, cuz it's a You need You should You should consider it. I have it there just in case. But but you should consider it because cute ain't going to get you that far. I didn't have makeup on. No, I'm not trying to be cute. You can't make this [ __ ] up. You're You're somebody's mother. 20 years of life, ma'am. Yes. Four languages. I'm going to ask you this question one more time and then I'm going to let you go because I'm about to cuss you the French toast out. What the [ __ ] is wrong with you? Nothing. I'm blessed. 20 years. How long How much money you think you going to need? Well, in that time, I mean, let's say 20 years. Go ahead. Whatever. How much are you going to need to retire to live for like from 65 to 85? How much? Ballpark it saying I pay off my mortgage on 5,000. Who knows? That's what if I'm if I live home. How much? No, like Oh, you said in the like in 20 years a lot. Hundreds of thousands. Hundred thousands. $100,000 for 20 years. Hundreds of thousands. How much? Let's say 900,000. I don't know. 20 years if I pay off my mortgage and all that. How much are you making annually right now? But not more than $60,000 a year. Like no, like if that $50,000 a year. No, like 58. Are you hourly or salary? Salary. You're making $29 an hour. But then hair on the side. So that's my And you also have a daughter. Are you getting child support? No. Ma'am, you live in LA. $58,000 is roughly $30,000 a year everywhere else. And see, audience, I'm going go into the audience because I I'm trying to give you the benefit of the doubt of being nervous. Yeah, this is this is this is beyond nervous. This is just unpreparedness for life. It's not a game. It's not. And I'm asking you a grown-up question. How much you going to need to live on? And it's like, I can't even comprehend how much that's going to talk. And and the thing is, uh, you better figure it out because the only way this [ __ ] works is if you have a husband. But this kind of stuff right here does not mean husband. Scatterbrain cute girls with ADHD. And I don't mean any disrespect. I understand ADHD very well, but still, you got to do something about it. And bottom line, you're going to need about $2.4 million out in LA. And you ain't going to get there on $60,000 a year. You're not going to get there on an associates degree. You're not going to get there on higher on the side. You're going to be living paycheck to paycheck in LA. And if you're not in a relationship, marriage, family, where will you be? And that's how I like talking in your videos. Where would you be though? I'm not sure. I I the street. Oh, I'd go to Guatemala. No. Yeah, I get where you're coming from. Oh, you're so good. Oh my gosh. Fine. So, you just stuck your foot in your [ __ ] mouth. No. No. This is ridiculous, man. This is ridiculous. I mean, I'm serious. This is why I don't take that young [ __ ] I was young. Because being young does not give women any other they don't they're not growing. Look at that. Black women are dying a dying homeless population growing. LA, black women dying homeless in Los Angeles County, women of color, you so this little cute, you had somebody who wanted to be with you, ma'am. We've gone from the rules of engagement to you're you're supposed to be teaching a whole woman, a young lady how to grow up, right? Who's teaching you me day by day and my ma'am? Man, what if you're not qualified? Would you qualify yourself? I wasn't to do hair and I studied you. I have friends who are engaged. I hair and a person are two different things. Right. So, you learn by No, you you learn by understanding you're not qualified and going and getting the education. Correct. Modern women women today are so oblivious and so they are arrogant. You're in that you're in that camp right now. Arrogant. No, I because you're sitting there talking I'm talking about what if you don't get I can't imagine that man. I don't know how you think this is coming across. But at 55 I asked you how what's life going to be like? You can't even comprehend that you don't get what you want. Cute goes away. Of course, Q goes away. And this is what we're doing in the West. They're not teaching women to prioritize relationships. So, all you guys are doing is going around doing what the hell you want to, doing what feels good, making babies out of wedlock, breaking your homes, wrecking relationships, and then you want a man to come along after you find Jesus. And then you put his dick on ice. He can't have sex. He can't get a baby out of you. What the hell? That makes no sense. No, we've heard it, man. This is crazy. This is why I think therapy is so good. And that medication, I'm not kidding, man. Women with ADHD are walking time bombs because you're emotional creatures and your brain chemistry is off. You need to be taking that medication. I've dealt with women. I've dated women. I understand ADHD very well. and your cute pass won't work. Oh, nobody uses that. She's 27, single, and had her first child at 19. Life happened fast, maybe too fast, but now she says she's changed. She's got rules now. Kevin Samuels asks her plainly, "What are your dating standards today?" She answers with confidence. I'm not having sex again until marriage. And that's when Kevin hits the brakes. Wait, now you want to withhold sex? Let's be real. She's already had a child out of wedlock. But now, nearly a decade later, she's declaring celibacy. Kevin doesn't shame her, but he does give her a dose of harsh truth. Because in the dating market, your value isn't based on what you say today. It's based on your past, your choices, and how realistic your expectations are. And the truth is, you gave the first man access without marriage. But now you're asking the next man to wait. That's not purity. That's strategy, and men see right through it. Kevin lays it out simply. You're trying to negotiate from a place of weakness. You're no longer in a position to raise the price. And that's when he drops the line that made waves. Ma'am, if you keep moving like this, you're going to die alone.