Transcription
I've got the feeling that there's some of you saying, "Are we so and so was here? This is so awesome! They would have enjoyed it." But let me tell you, you'll be mistaken that you've paid the price to not only to come and listen to people about various topics, but that this is actually destiny setting you up for your future. It is happening, and right now, and your "mister moment" if you wish. The others who are not here are, yeah, so be here right now, showing up for your own best self to come to the fore. As we play beyond at TEDx Van Took 2015, I also suspect this summer view is sitting there thinking, "I saw the theme said leadership, but I'm still not hearing the ten tips of how to be a best leader, the tools and the skills, because the bosses tomorrow, in a year, what have you learned about leadership?"
Also to you, we would love to extend an invitation to say, "Pay attention to that leadership." As you've heard from Mike this morning about the risk, and then from Jerry around people, and just now from Daisy around brands, is all a way of articulating that leadership is not just a position. It's a way of being in the world, in a way that's authentic to who you are. And by the way, I would prefer, since this is TEDx playing beyond, our team, that if there's something that resonates with you, that we just do this. Let me try now.
I was raised by my grandmother, will you see, they, my maternal grandmother, and see it, this humming song constantly. And again, I'm gonna ask you if you can, and doubts me, it goes a little bit like this: "John eNOS," which says, "I can see clearly now the rain is gone." You know the song. And I always wondered, what's about the song that intrigues my grandmother so much? And I have come to learn, and especially when I paid attention to not just the tune, but the words where it says, "I can see clearly now that the obstacles in my way are gone. I can see clearly now that the dark clouds that used to blind me are gone." That the reality is, there are best moments, our biggest breakthroughs will not only come when we apply certain tools to our lives and set them skills and ways of being, but it will come. Our breakthroughs will come when we begin to see in a new way. So if it resonates with you, we do this. What you're taking notes? Because remember, the soul further goes and says, "As Leaders, it's only when the rain or the clouds are gone that that we are able to see in a new way."
The reality is that leadership is messy, constant whirlwind, constant rapid. And the only way for us to be able to lead properly from our individual sins is when we come to be able to see that not just when it's clear skies, but in the midst of the mess, in the midst of the storm, that we are able to see clearly. Even though the rain is still there, there is true leadership. So what you see is a way of seeing, a paradigm. Some people refer to it, reference point, is really the only and the ultimate breakthrough for our to transformation. But this is something that we have to learn. Because often we get stuck with this thing about the tools and the skills and not paying attention to our own lives, particularly to what stories are we telling ourselves about who we are. But the art of leadership is about seeing in a new way. Our growth as leaders is proportional to the extent that we, in an unceasing, constant way, interrogate and re-examine those things we believe to be true for ourselves. Our reference points, our paradigms, our beliefs, our mindsets. Play beyond this leaders requires a new way of seeing. And the only way we can do that is there me reexamine who we are and what's happening around us.
I love this theme that speaks about playing beyond. Because isn't it interesting that on a daily basis, we use particular narratives, metaphors of looking at our lives? We approach leadership from a perspective of the tools, the skills, the techniques, the know-how, not paying attention our own truth that's been realized for us. When we describe great leaders, we often look at them not through the prism of what they've done and the skills they've had, but who they are as individuals, their character, who they are in terms of their being. But the first thing is, how kind of predominant reference point is, "Let me learn the skills." That we learn the tools. Until you get to what I have experienced with the client, senior management, and the metaphor we use was the black box. And in it, we learned that the idea of the black box as a way of looking at the organization. They've tried the tools, they send people a management training, and then the moment of aha, the dropping of the reality for them came when they realize, "We've been trying from the outside in to fix organizations, not teams." Not realizing the biggest breakthroughs for our team and organization, and for myself, will come when I look at myself in a different way. What are the metaphors? What other lessons, the narratives that I carry around myself?
Playing beyond as a metaphor for leadership is a bit of a counterintuitive idea, but I quite like it. This outside there is a playing ground. Lots of adults around the pool. I suspect lots of fancy titles that came for holiday. None of them were in their right mind. Go up to those slides and just play. Isn't there often true of us as leaders? Because there's things that get in our way, particularly our titles, particularly the expectations others have of us, and that stops us to unfold the trueness of who we are. Metaphors are stories. They are images. And their internal maps. Richard Rohr says, "All language is by necessity metaphor and symbol." My son James Daniel, we have a practice like Mike said earlier, you should have gone, but you forgot the lessons you've learned. Early in the morning, James Daniel, we have the practice in our home, a family lives away. When you come from school, we asked the question, "So, how was your day?" And I asked him one day last year, and he said, "I had a good day, thank you." And then he asked me a very interesting question. He says, "Dad, and how was your day?" And I said, "I had fun at work, boy." And he protested. He said, "Dad, you can't work isn't fun." But it struck me so powerfully to say to myself, "How do I come home? And how do I show up after work?" Even when they go on trips with me, and they see how dare does work, and they get the narrative that work is actually not fun. And I would want to challenge us today on this idea of saying, "Playing beyond is an invitation." That when you go back the organizations, to back to your team, unless you let go of your expectations, your reference point, your team will experience you in a particular way. Like my son experienced me. Role model leadership and work. And I suspect the picture that he gets is the Greek mythology Sisyphus. It's a constant grind up this mountain. Please, Lord, help us, save us. Can we not have breakthroughs? The reality is, those are narratives that we carry with ourselves. And today is your moment to break with this. And in particular, to say, "We need a new narrative, a new imagery, a new picture, a new metaphor." The workplace, as we're not just playing, but be playing beyond. Metaphors are powerful things. You can't be inauthentic with them. The absolute fun people use all kinds of metaphors. And if you look at companies, there's almost this thing of people experience leaders. So in head office, arrive, there's this almost spring cleaning of the offices. There is a story that you're telling them. And it's a story you're telling the others that's with you there to lead into the future. And playing beyond the same, we need to be aware. It is not an easy job. It is a constant push. But it can't just be a Sisyphus. Playing beyond requires from us to explore and to acknowledge that the metaphors that we have in organizations reveal that not only to DNA the organization, but also the DNA of the leader. What is the metaphor that people have a view? There's a leader. I know we give our bosses the names, funny names. And it represents who we regard them as. Until we become those very leaders that them up there. And then we're at Bryce, when people are brave enough to tell us what the metaphor is for us.
I love the book from a guy called John Pierre Will. He wrote the book called "The Well of Being." It basically makes the point of saying, "As we journey through life, we pick up stories, narratives." Narratives or stories or imagery of, "I'm lacking, I'm not enough, I'm not the one. It's outside myself. It's beyond myself." As you heard a Mike Amy earlier, saying about taking a risk, it's creating a journey, a platform of greatness. You've heard Jerry speak about how people become the unlock of the future. And our brains, your own brain as a leader, brains of countries communicate in powerful ways. What are we saying about ourselves in terms of leadership stories that declare what will I amount to? Stories about who we should be or think we are. I would love to leave with the idea of saying, "Metaphors are important for us to really truly see the state of organizations and of our own leadership." To play beyond requires of us to look at the metaphors in our organization. Oh, I love the side of, you know, when you open the newspapers, you often hear how people look at leaders, public figures, teachers, principals, the people in our community, the ones out there that's leaning, that's leading organizations or our communities. That we deceive, we almost enjoy, we love the moment to observe their failings and their success. Not realizing that we part of that community. That leadership is not a position, but it's a way of being in the world. And when we describe them, we describe ourselves.
There's an experiment done, and it's called the, the idea is called the bystander effect. And what happens in this idea is somebody's in need, somebody needs help. And what happens is the, the number, if there's a crowd of people, the more people you have from the internet environment, the less likely it is that people will help. Hence the idea of the bystander effect. I would want to suggest to you today that that is often the predominant idea out there in terms of leadership. We wish we could one day be leaders, not knowing that moment is right now. And us enjoying their failings and their success is as powerfully a communication about who we are, then about them. The moment for stopping being eyewitnesses and wanting to look for scapegoats is today. When it says at TEDx, that frame of reference of us being, "They'll," not the leaders, and not activating our own agency to be the change agents. If you often say, "Has to stop playing beyond requires us to forego the excuses, to forego the scapegoating, to stop being the eye witness and to say, 'I will not only show up my organization, but I also show up for myself.'" Yes, TEDx. One of my biggest moments of leadership, or leadership moment, has been the opportunity that I had to take around this particular gentleman. You've seen the mood, "Pursuit of Happyness." I've been with somebody for a full day, not realizing this. I didn't, I couldn't even remember his name. As men, but Chris, we had dinner together, to come to Table Mountain, and we saw a lot of things. Only when I saw the movie that I realized, "Graham, you had your best leadership moment right there." And you were waiting, like I suspect some of us, it is still to come. Our biggest moments of leadership is right now. TEDx is just a platform, a catalyst, a vehicle for us to unlock the biggest opportunities for us. While you're hoping and tweeting to a friend and saying, "I wish we lose our moment of leadership." Our big moment is right in front of us. Please pay attention as you go to the day, because that moment is here and now. And with your AAU, leadership is a really interesting thing for me. I've also gone the route, and I've trained with business schools, who have gone to the courses, because that's the predominant metaphor or kind of orientation. Get the skills, get to know how. It's only when you know your greatest moment is when you wake up to yourself. When you wake up to yourself, and knowing that this thing that Mike spoke about about risk, of our people, by branding, is nothing other than invitation to the newness of who you can be. And we're gonna play beyond. As I try and conclude, I love this picture. You know, often we are invited to conversations like this, and we are asked to make a new commitment. You get married, you make a commitment. When you find a partner, or you join a company, you are asked to make a commitment. The reality is, or for me, that's a fact that we experience. However, a deeper truth, and an insert, I have discovered was one way I've learned that the biggest breakthrough is not only the way you look at things, but a new mechanism, a silent one, that requires a new orientation from us. And there is saying, "Let go, surrender." And the thing that holds us back is not the others. I've always said, "I wish people can give me opportunities." And I've come to wake up to the reality saying, "It's the only one stopping me right now is not myself." So the challenge is not to commit. The challenge is not just that we wake up, that we no longer I witness --is and have the excuse. But it's to let go of our internal maps, to let go of our own stories, our own narratives. And narratives are saying, "It can't be me." Let me tell you, friends, it is you. Which is why this platform was created, and you showed up, driving and traveling through the night, taking planes to come to this conversation. And this conversation has been set up not by the organizers, they've just been vehicles to create that for you, but it's been set up by destiny. The future of saying, "My friend, you invited in. Can you now look at this and let go?" I close by saying to you, "Our next breakthroughs is relative to the adoption of new and more enabling beliefs about ourselves, about our organizations." This country of just contouring Independence Day, and the inauguration of a new president, they are no bigger moments of the shedding of old skin. Like right now, you showed up yourself there, TEDx, but it's requiring of you to not just internalize and hear these ideas, but to make it part of who you are. I leave you with responsibility, not just to let go and to surrender of those expectations and beliefs, but also to show up in a far and more refreshing way to yourself. I close by reminding us of a gentleman by the name of SES McClure. He says, "There is no one. He says, "There is no one. None but us." Does he steadies 2015? Let's play beyond. Our moment of leadership is right now. I thank you. You.