Transcription
Yeah, they all say they all say so good. His movies were so goddamn good, you know. He used to do like complex mathematics in his spare time. He did. Yes, for fun. Well, I don't understand what complex math is, but one time I was in an elevator, normal McDonald's, and we're in the elevator with these guys because knowing Donald in an elevator is very, you know, he'll just destroy. He will literally say the worst thing you could say about somebody and then leave, and you're left there with all the people. That's his thing. One of his things.
But these two guys were talking about some complex mathematic things in the late '90s at 30 Rock, and they're saying these like, I didn't even understand what language it was. It was a really deep mathematic thing. And then Norm Macdonald, who had never brought up math or anything like that to be in his life, goes, "That," and starts speaking to them in this like, what sounded like tongues. And they're like, "Oh, you know, uh," but and they start speaking the binary up. And he goes, "Bye," and he starts speaking this mathematic talk. And then they leave. And then he goes to be like, "Yeah, yeah, those guys are nerds or something like that." And I was like, "How do you know that? How did you know what they were talking about?" How did he know? He's, he's, he's like, "Oh, you know, he's a nerd too." See, he knows something deep. Like he knows these things sometimes. He's a very smart guy. Really smart. Yeah, those guys are just, you know, he'll just pretend not to know something. Yeah, that's like, and then you're like, well, anybody walks in a room, he just, he knows what they're talking about, you know? Yeah.
He's the guy that really should have had a podcast a long [ __ ] time ago. And I know he's doing something now. He sent me a text message the other day that he's just starting to do a podcast now. Doing a podcast. Doing that thing we talked about. He should have done a lot because he had that show on on Netflix, but he kind of, they muzzled him when he went on the Howard Stern show, right? And he was saying something and he didn't want to say [ __ ]. So he said, "You'd have to have Down Syndrome to believe that." He thought that would be a better thing to say. [Laughter]
But here's the thing about Norm. I'm, I'm still not sure if he thought that would be a better thing to say, right? You know, because he's so smart, he might have been doing it as a double troll. Yeah, no, Norm is capable of the double troll. Was like, "Yeah, I don't want to say [ __ ]. Down Syndrome." The double troll. Exactly. Yes, he's the master of that stuff.
I randomly wound up sitting next to him on planes twice on two different occasions, just like, "I go, Norm," like out of nowhere, and he's sitting next to me. And one time, he's, we're sitting there, we're talking, and we're having a good old time. And then he's talking about, "Oh, I quit smoking." He's telling me how he quit smoking and [ __ ] yeah, finally quit smoking. And he's telling me all these things that when he lands, he literally like, he can't stop himself, runs into the airport store and buys cigarettes and he's lighting it as he's leaving. I go, "I thought you quit." He was, "I did, but all that talking about smoking makes me want one." And he's like, before he even got out the door, he's lighting the cigarette. He just couldn't stop himself. But like, he goes, "All that talking." He's the one talking about all that talk. He always puts it on you. That's what's great about it. But it was, he's like this guy, he talks about smoking, he got me back smoking. But it was so crazy because I was like, "That's great, Norm. It's so great you quit." And he's like, "I want a cigarette." No, you always feel like with the game, you know, "I don't drink and I quit drinking." And it was like, "Oh, really? Did you drink a lot?" "Yeah, I quit. I finally had to quit, you know, it's hard, but I did it." And they're like, "Oh." He goes, "Yeah, 'cause I got [ __ ] wasted last night and I said, 'I'm never gonna drink again.'" I was drunk. And people like, "Wait, I think you quit." "Yeah, I quit. That's what I'm saying. You know, last night." It's like an elaborate like Abbott Costello. Yes, exactly.
Well, the gambling too. He [ __ ] loves gambling. Loves it. Oh, yeah, yeah. But that's a thing. Like a lot of these great comics are like really impulsive. Yeah, it's like something about like the ability to say some of the crazy [ __ ] that he says. Yeah, it's you have to have this this like hot wire. Yeah, it's just like, yeah, you just want to touch it. Ah, yep. Oh, no. He's one for the books. Yeah.