Transcription
Here's your matrix card. Try not to die so early this time, you freak.
Oh. Uh, yeah, I'll try. This is the grid. Every day, us isos have to enter into the matrix and are forced to complete challenges to survive. Nobody knows how we got here. All we remember is waking up and suddenly being forced to compete in these challenges.
Hey, what are you doing? You filthy iso.
Um, nothing. You people are so gross. You should just go die already.
What? You can't just say that.
Yes, I can. I can say whatever I want. I mean, have you looked at your eyes? So gross.
Hey, my eyes aren't gross. That's a node. Her name is Caitlyn. The matrix is divided between the nodes and the ISOs. The nodes are the ones who force us to compete in the challenges, but nobody knows why. They're also kind of racist towards us ISOs.
All right, I should hurry up and enter the Matrix. I don't want to get punished again for slacking.
Huh? You want me to punish you?
What? Burger? Uh, no. I definitely did not say that.
Aw, I was going to enjoy spanking you.
What the? That's Burger. He's an ISO just like me. All the ISOs wear blue and all the nodes wear red.
Hey, how far did you make it yesterday?
Oh, I'm still stuck on level one. What about you?
Oh, I finally got to level two. So, uh, can you call me a good boy?
What? No, but isn't it kind of crazy that we've been here for almost 3 months, and level two is the farthest you've gotten? I mean, there's 10 levels, but I haven't heard of anyone even getting past level four.
Yeah, it does seem like we're going to be here forever. They say level four is impossible. I just wonder why the king is allowing this all to happen.
Oh, well that's actually Never mind. Who knows?
Huh? Do you know something about the king?
Um, yeah, but I'll tell you some other time. For now, I should keep it a secret.
What? No. Please tell me. What if I give you some sucky sucky?
What? No. I'm going to go enter the Matrix portal now.
Man, that guy is weird. I got to be more careful. I almost told him my big secret. I got to remember, I can't tell anyone that I actually helped create this place.
Um, hey, here's my card. Can I enter in?
Oh. Uh, yeah. Go ahead. But try not to pee your pants again.
Oh my god. It was one time and it was only a little tinkle.
Yeah, sure, man. Whatever you say. Okay, whatever. I've got a good feeling about today. Something special is definitely going to happen.
Here we go. Level one, death match. Okay, all I need to do is make it to level three. Nobody knows this, but there's a secret back door exit on level three that will allow me to escape the matrix and return back to the real world. But first, I have to somehow pass level one, which I've never done. That's because level one is a boss fight, but the boss is always changing, so you can never learn his attack patterns. Hopefully, I get an easy boss today. What's stupid is they only give you a wooden sword for this.
Okay, let's see. Um, what the hell? Oh my god, he's already shooting fire at me. Okay, I got to go in. Um, oh my god, this guy is ugly. Okay. Oh my god. Okay, his name is the decaying king. Dude, this guy's massive. What the Oh. Oh, what? He's shooting purple balls at me. Hello. Okay, what? He can use spin Oh, that's great. He can use spin jutsu, too. Great. This guy's Okay. All right. All right. Okay. I only get three steak. Okay. All right. All right. We got to ration this I've only done like a third of his health. Okay. All right. All right. He's shooting fireballs, dude. This guy can shoot purple balls. Fireballs. Okay. Okay. All right. Okay. I'm Okay. Wait. Here we go. All right. All right. Okay. Okay. All right. All right. All right. Don't want to get greedy here. Okay. All right. We're actually Oh my god. This is the farthest I've ever gotten. Okay. All right. That's a lot of fire. That is a lot of fire. Okay. All right. I got to dodge the fire. Okay. I am Okay. That's Okay. That's a lot of fire, buddy. That's a lot of fire. Okay. Oh my god. Hello. You have added the turkeyy's juice nipple into the chicken soup, and now you are adding up a jillion million ingredients. Leave me alone. Okay. All right. The purple balls again. Okay. I don't even know what those do. Oh. Oh, they give me withering effect. Okay, that's bad. Oh, that's really bad. Okay, I've got to end this. I have to hurry up and end this. Come on. Dodge and leave, baby. Dodge and weave. Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on. Die. Die. Please. Just die. Please. Wait. Okay. Okay. All right. Don't want to get greedy and die. Come on. Come on. This is the farthest I've ever gone. He's so low. Can't go back now. Come on. Come on. Come on. Let's end this quickly. Come on. Come on. Dodge and weave. And then let's end one more hit. One more good hit. Come on. Come on. Stop shooting fire. Come on. Let's do this. Come on. Come on. Come on. I did it. I I I actually did.
What the I'm not going to lie. I just got super lucky there. I have never passed level one before. This is insane.
Congratulations. You may now proceed to level two.
Huh? Is this that guy's sword? Oh my god. This is sick. Wait, what's this other Ew? That's the demon's heart. I don't want that. Gross. But yeah, I'll take the sword. This looks sick.
Oh my god, I can't believe after 3 months, I finally did it. I finally beat the boss. Now, if I can just pass level two, I can get to level three. And then I can escape the matrix and be free. I've been stuck here for 3 months. Ever since he betrayed me, but now I can finally escape. Let's do this. Level two, the code.
All right, level two. Gh. I helped build the system, but I didn't build the challenges, so I have no idea what this challenge is. In order to move on to level three, you must correctly crack the code and input it into the book. You will only get one attempt and you will only have 60 seconds to solve the code.
What? I only get a minute. Okay, this is going to be tricky. I am not good with puzzles or anything that involves thinking to be honest. Once you are ready, open the book to begin. Okay, if I only get a minute, I should go. Okay, you loop from 1 to 5 times only. Even what the hell? Okay. You loop from 1 to five five times. Only even numbers are added to the total. What's the What is this? A math problem? Oh no. I'm so cooked. I'm so cooked. Okay. Oh no, dude. I'm going to have to start over. I'm going to I cannot Okay. Um you loop from 1 to 5 times. Okay. So five. Okay. Only even numbers. Okay. Wait. Okay. Uh five times only even numbers. So that's from 1 to 5. That's 2 and six. So 2 and 6. Wait, no. 2 and 4 equals 6. Oh god. Okay. Uh 6 five times. That's that's six. Uh that's that's uh that's that's 30, right? 30 30 30 correct. Oh. Oh my god. Oh my god. That was close. That was close. Okay. All right. That was I had like what? 5 seconds. Oh my god. Okay. I am uh Why did they have to give me a math problem? I literally suck at math.
Okay. You may now proceed to level three.
Okay. Um, all right. That wasn't that wasn't terrible. I mean, it was terrible. Honestly, I got really lucky there. But now I can go on to level three and I can finally enter the back door and escape. Let's do this. Level three, death switch.
All right. Um, I think the back door exit should be somewhere up there. But first, I'm going to have to pass level three. Oh, Burger's here.
Oh, hey, Nut. Wow, look at us. We both got to level three. I know this is a new record for both of us, but how did you get past level two? No offense, but you're kind of dumb.
What? Nuh-uh. I'm super smart.
Right. Well, any idea what this level is?
No, but I'm getting kind of worried. After this is level four, and nobody's gotten past that.
Oh, well, if you follow me after this, I know a shortcut.
Really? But how? You've never been to this level before.
Oh. Uh, I heard it from someone.
Oh, okay. Want a kiss?
What? No. Why would we
Hello everyone, and welcome to level three. This level is called Death Switch. In front of you is a wall with levers. One of these levers will open the portal and allow you to pass. The other levers will kill whoever the lever correlates to and you will not respawn on the grid. You will die permanently.
Oh, I see. Each lever has a face above it which correlates to one of us. And if that's not the correct lever, it'll kill that person.
Um, guys, Burger is super confused. So, basically, we have to try to guess the right lever, but the levers will kill the person it correlates to if it's wrong.
Oh, okay. Burger understands now. Thank you, master.
Yeah. Wait, did you just call me master?
All right. Well, nobody better flick my lever or I'll kill you.
Wait, but what if your lever is the correct one?
Well, well, well. I don't want to die either. So, no one flick my lever.
Guys, if we don't flick anyone's lever, then we won't pass.
Then let's flick yours.
Wait, wait, wait. Well, um, that's that's what I thought. I guess we'll sit here till somebody wants to risk their life.
H, what should I do? If I tell them that I helped build the Matrix, then they might listen to me. But the truth is, I didn't design the challenge, so I have no idea what the correct answer is. But I guess they don't need to know that.
Um, listen up everyone. I have something to tell you. It's about my past. You see, I actually built this world.
What? What?
A long time ago, me and my friend Cole built the Matrix as a fun game to escape reality. But then things took a dark turn. My friend wanted to trap people in the Matrix to create a super AI robot that would have the knowledge of hundreds of humans. Those humans would be forced to complete simulated challenges to power the AI. Obviously, I opposed him and said it wasn't morally right. But then he betrayed me and took away my admin credentials. And now I'm trapped in here just like all of you.
What you mean? We're in a game right now?
Yes. This is total
There's no way that's true.
Well, it's different for you nodes. You see, ISOs are users from the real world, but the nodes are programs. Basically, AI.
What? I am not an AI. I'm a human, you worm.
I'm sorry, but it's true. But that's how I know the correct answer for this puzzle.
Okay. What is it?
It's always the first lever. I could be killing someone right now, but if I don't, then we'll be stuck in here forever, and I need to escape.
Um, are you sure? That's my lever, man.
I'm positive. Don't worry.
Well, Burger is super nervous, but I trust my big senpai nut.
Can you ever just be normal?
All right. Well, if you're sure, then go flick the lever.
All right. Don't worry. I know what I'm doing.
Oh, god. I really hope I'm right about this.
Incorrect. You have flicked the wrong lever. So, Bert has died.
Um, what the hell? I thought you knew what lever it was.
Uh, oh no. Am I going to die?
Um, listen guys, I uh had it wrong. It was the last lever.
Oh, hell no. That's my lever. There's no way you're flicking it.
Incorrect. You have flicked the wrong lever. So, Caitlyn has died.
What? What's going on? What did you do?
Um, listen, Burger. You're just going to have to trust me on this one.
No, don't you dare flick my lever. I'll never let you drink my juices again.
What? I never drank your
Trust me, Burger. I was misremembering. It's always the second lever.
Fine. if you're sure. But if I die, please piss on my body.
Okay. One, you're not going to die. And two, what the
All right, here we go. Please be correct.
Correct. You have flicked the correct lever and can now proceed to level four.
Yes, we did it. Yay! I lived a goon another day. Now I can escape through the back door.
Burger, do you have any blocks and maybe a pickaxe?
Yeah, I was keeping some stashed away in my big burger butt.
Oh god. Okay, let's go. Come on.
Yes, sir. I'm finally going to escape this place. And once I'm back in the real world, I can get my admin credentials back and get my revenge on Cole.
All right. Right here, burger. Let's build up.
Yes, sir. I cannot believe I've made it this far. This is This is crazy. I I I thought I was going to be an ISO forever, but this is my only chance to to escape. I mean, oh my god. Okay, I've got to focus here. I got to build up. I I think this is where it is, by the way. I could be completely wrong on on the exact location, but it should be right there. It should be right where the sun is.
Um Yeah, we should We're right right here, Burger. Right here. You got to mine up.
Okay. Yes, sir. And yes. Okay, it's right here.
Oh my god. Oh my god. I'm getting I'm getting so nervous. Okay, here we go. This is the main frame.
All right, we're here. Oh my god. I can't believe we actually did it. All right, we're here. This is the main frame. Now we just got to find the backdoor portal.
Wo! This is so cool.
Where are we?
I just said this is the main frame. It's sort of like a connector that connects us with the outside world. Now come on, let's go. We have to find the portal.
Sir, it appears two ISOs have entered into the back door and are heading for the emergency exit portal.
Damn it. It's nut, isn't it? I should have deleted his code when I had the chance.
Who's the other ISO?
Um, it says his name is Burger.
Huh? I've never heard of him. Is he some kind of genius?
Uh, no. Actually, he has the lowest IQ in the entire Matrix. He's uh very stupid.
Oh, damn. Well, go ahead and eliminate them. Use the guns or whatever you have to.
Come on, hurry up, Burger. Are we there yet? My legs are tired.
Just a little farther. I can see it up there. I'm so close to being able to be back in the real world.
Wait, is there someone up there?
Oh god. Wait, who is that?
Uh, Burger, turn around and run.
What? But we just got here and my legs are tired.
Burger, I said run.
God damn it. Of course, he would send the cyber security.
Damn it. Damn it. Damn it. Damn it. Damn it. I'm so screwed. I'm so screwed. I'm so screwed. What am I supposed to do now? This ruins everything. Oh my god. Oh my god. I'm going to die. Oh my god. I'm going to die. Oh my god. These guys are like elite trained. There's Okay. All right. I have to try to make it back. I have to try to make it back to the portal. Uh oh my god. My only choice is Oh my god. Damn it. Damn it. Damn it. Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. Burger is so dead. Burger is so dead. Okay. Um where's the way back? Where's the way back? Where's the way back?
Over here. Okay. Okay. I just got to make it to the portal. I got to make it to the portal and go to the next level. Oh my god. Oh, this ruins everything. Oh no. Okay. I just got to jump. Come on. Okay. All right. All right. I I Oh, Burger so screwed. Burger so screwed. All right. Come on. Come on. Uh, come on. Come on.
Level four. Here we go. Okay. Okay. I'm alive. All right. It should take them some time to find me, so I should be all right for now. Burger might have died, though. Damn it. I was so close. If I had escaped, I would have been back in the real world, and then I'd be able to give myself my admin credentials back, and then I could take down Cole. But now he's definitely going to be guarding the back doors. So I guess my only choice now is to try to beat the remaining levels. Speaking of which, this should be level four, right? Nobody's ever gotten past it. I wonder why that is.
Level four, the loop. You are currently trapped in a room and will remain here until you can find the secret way out.
Uh, nah, screw that. I'm just going to die and go back home. If nobody's ever beaten this level, I doubt I'll be able to do it.
Ooh, that's toasty. All right, time to go back home.
Huh? What just happened? Shouldn't I be back home? What type of Harry Potter is this?
All right, let's try this again. Time to go back home.
Okay, this is messed up. So, I literally cannot leave until I solve this puzzle.
Wait, I get it. It's behind this painting.
Oh, okay. I guess not.
H Oh, wait. You clever BDSM bastards. It's this painting, isn't it?
Huh? Okay, not so easy. And so over the course of the next week, I did nothing but search for a way out. This is so frustrating. There's literally no way out of here. I can't break blocks, and dying doesn't make me respawn.
Wait, wait, wait. What is that? Is that a button?
No way. That's almost impossible to notice.
All right. Well, I guess I'll click on it.
Oh, damn. This is some Scooby-Doo right here. What the hell?
All right, let's get out of here. I've only got five more levels, and they can't be that hard, right? Looking back, I was wrong, cuz things were about to get a lot harder.
All right, level five. Here we go.
Level 4.5. What? Five? All right, now you're pulling the turkeyy's nipple here. What do you mean .5? There's only supposed to be 10 levels.
Level 4.5 is just a warning. From here on out, if you die in any of the challenges, you will not respawn at the grid. Your code will be deleted, and you will die permanently. And uh I can't go back home. No, you must keep going.
Great. Well, if I went back home now, Cole would probably catch me and I'd be dead anyways. So, I guess I have no choice but to keep going.
All right, let's do this. Five more levels and then I can escape the matrix.
Level five, the quiz.
Huh? What? Burger, you survived.
Oh, hey, Nut. Yeah, I had to suck off the guards, but I made it.
Hey yo, what? This level is a quiz. You must answer a total of five questions. However, if you get three wrong, you will all be killed.
Uh, okay. Wait, wait. Is that a polar bear?
Yo, my name's Josh. You can speak.
Um, hey, I'm Julia.
Oh, hey. My name's Nut and that's Burger. He's really weird. Just ignore him.
What? I'm not weird.
Hey Josh, do polar bears go, too?
Hey, you'll leave the polar bear alone. Anyways, we have to answer five questions, and if we get three wrong, we all die. So, let's try to focus.
Um, we're ready.
All right. To answer the question, you will click one of these buttons. Each button corresponds to a letter.
Got it. Thank god it's a multiple choice. The first question is, what is 8 / 1? Is it A 0, B 10, or C 8?
Damn it, a math question. Oh, just my luck.
Oh, I got this one. I'm great at math.
Woah, woah, woah. Who put you in charge, you woman? Burger is super smart. So, Burger's going to answer this one.
I already know it's a
incorrect. You have two lives remaining. Burger.
Oh. Uh, whoops. The next question is, what is the color that comes after yellow in the rainbow? Is it A green, B blue, or C red?
No need to fear. Burger's got this one.
Um, are you sure this time?
Of course. Burger loves rainbows, so it's obviously beef or blue.
Incorrect. You have one life remaining. If you answer incorrectly again, you will all die.
Burger, no more answering. Burger probably should have mentioned that Burger is a color blind. The next question is, which piece in chess moves diagonally? Is it A the knight, B the bishop, or C the rook?
Ooh, Burger knows this. No, no, no. Burger sit. Burger stay.
A
Hey, uh, I got this one, guys. I play chess all the time.
Oh, I didn't know polar bears could play chess.
It's B the bishop.
Are you sure? If you get it wrong, we die.
Bro, trust me, I'm a god at chess.
Correct. There is now two questions remaining.
Yes, good job. But how the hell does a polar bear play chess?
The next question is, how many sides does an octagon have? Is it A, 6, B, 8, or C, 10? Huh? What the heck is an octagon? Nobody's going to know that. Uh, it's obviously eight. Haven't you ever seen a stop sign? Correct. Oh, yeah. Right. I was just joking.
You now have one question left, but also only one life left. If you answer incorrectly, you will die. The question is, what is the name of the king of the matrix? Is it A, Zeke, B, Cole, or C, Martin? What? Nobody knows that. Uh, actually, I do. What? How? Are you sure? I'm not going to let you risk our lives on a guess. I guess I have no choice but to tell them. Yes, I'm sure. I'll explain everything. It all started 3 months ago when we had finished building the Matrix. All right, it's all done. The Matrix is finally finished. Good, good, good. Now would probably be a good time to mention that I've taken away your admin credentials. What? Why? Because I want to turn the Matrix into something bigger, something better. So, you're betraying me? Yes. I'll turn you into one of those ISOs that you love so much and you'll compete in your own system. Wo. So, he really betrayed you just because he wanted to trap people in here. Yes. We're currently part of an AI that in the real world is making him billions of dollars. Damn, that's messed up. Oh, thanks, Polar Bear. We need to get to level 10 and stop him. That's my goal. I need to get to level 10 and get my admin credentials back so I can stop him. His name is uh Cole. Correct. You have answered all five questions and are now able to move on to level six. Well, I hope you're able to stop him and we'll all be set free. Yeah, man. Good luck. If we see each other again, I'll help you stop him. All right. Thanks, everyone. That wasn't the whole truth, but it worked. All right. On to level six. Four more levels and then I'll be at level 10 where the control tower is, where he is. Okay. Wait, where am I now? This looks creepy. Level six, the break. Huh? I get a break. Yes. Take some time to relax. No way. There's got to be some sort of catch. There's no way I'm falling for this. Oh, wait. Is that cake? Um, am I allowed to eat this cake? Yes, you may eat as much cake as you want. M. Yes, please. Wa wa wa. Wait, slow down. Don't eat at all. But but but you said I could have as much as I want. Well, I didn't know you'd eat that much, you fat Hey, you can't call me that. Apologies, but please save some cake for other players. Well, then you shouldn't have said I can eat as much as I want. Wait, how exactly do I leave this place? The portal to level 7 is upstairs. You may leave whenever you want. So, this is really just a break. Are you sure a bunch of Oompa Loompas aren't going to come out and like touch me inappropriately? I uh What? No. Now, please stop talking to me. What? I helped build you. You're supposed to be a helpful, nice AI robot. Yes, but your face is really ugly. All right, whatever. I'm out of here. Actually, no. First, I'm going to eat more cake. H, that cake is good. God damn. Okay, here we go. Uh, I think she said that the portal is up here somewhere. Um, where where is it? What? Oh, there it is. Okay, here we go. Level seven. Three more levels and then I can escape the matrix. Please be easy. Please be easy. All right, here we go. Level seven, mining fatigue. Everyone will spend the next month mining ores. Whoever can collect the most ores within that time will pass, but everyone else will die. What? A month? I don't have time for that. Cole will find me by then. Oh, hey N. It's good to see you're still alive, huh? Oh, Julia and uh Mr. Polar Bear. Oh, my name's Josh. Oh, okay. Well, this is kind of awkward. The announcer lady said only one of us is going to pass this. Forget that. We managed to get our hands on the blueprints for this place. What? How? We swiped it off one of the guards. But anyways, do you know what this means? Wait, does that mean we can escape like right now and go back to the real world? Yep. If the blueprints are right, then there should be a back door on this level that leads straight to level 10. That's where the control tower is. Oh my god. Yes. Yes. Yes. You guys are amazing. So, do you know where it is? Yeah, it should be right over here. Wait, seriously? Oh my god. Wait, what? Oh, okay. Wait, this is Oh my god. This is This is perfect then. Oh my god. Yeah. And once you're on the outside, you can get your admin credentials back and set everyone free, right? Oh. Uh yeah, I can finally stop Cole. Well, just go, bro. All right. Um I'm assuming this portal will take us to level 10. Yep. It should take us directly to the control tower. And then we just got to go through the exit portal. All right. Here we go. All right. Is everyone okay? Yeah, I'm good. Wo. Is this the control tower? Yeah, it's uh pretty cool, huh? Anyways, now we just need to get to that portal over there and we'll be back in the real world. Oh, no. No, no, no, no, no. You will not be escaping today, nut. Damn it. It's Cole. That's Cole. Yeah. Crap. We need to go back. We need to get out of here. What? No, we're not going back. There's still three more levels we would have to do and I've been barely surviving. Yeah, I know. But, dude, chill. It's just one guy. Nut. Nut. Nut. You really thought you could escape and I wouldn't notice? Damn it. This wasn't how it was supposed to go. I should have killed you when I had the chance. This time, I won't give you any mercy. I don't care that we used to be friends. You've become too much trouble. Oh my god. Just shut up. That's going to kick your ass and set everyone free. I'm sorry. Did you just say set everyone free? Cole, just shut up. Huh? What's so funny? Oh, you poor poor misguided fool. Yes, Nut. How about you go ahead and set everyone free? I'll let you. I'm so confused. What's going on? So, what exactly did Nut tell you guys? He told us that you trapped everyone in here to create a super AI and make yourself rich. Then, when he tried to stop you, you turned him into an ISO. Oh, I get it now. So, you think I'm the villain here? Well, yeah. Is that not true? Just shut up, Cole. No more speaking. I swear to God, I'll kill you. You're ruining everything just like last time. Oh, this is too good. It seems you've done it again, Nut. You've lied and convinced another poor group of ISOs into thinking I'm the one that trapped them in here. Wait, another group of ISOs? Have you been here before, Nut? I uh Oh, yes, he has. Several times, in fact. He lies and manipulates people into thinking I'm the bad guy. But the truth is, he's the one that trapped you all in here. Shut up, you goddamn bastard. I'll kill you. What? What's going on? Let me tell you the whole story. It all started 3 months ago when we finished building the Matrix. All right, it's all done. The Matrix is finally finished. Good, good, good. Now would probably be a good time to mention that I've taken away your admin credentials. What? But why? Because I want to turn the Matrix into something bigger, something better. So, you're betraying me? Yes, I'll turn you into one of those ISOs that you love so much, and you'll compete in your own system. That is, unless you agree to give me the password so I can shut down the challenges. You're being ridiculous. The Matrix is designed around the challenges. You built them. Yes, but I didn't know that we would be trapping actual humans in here. It was supposed to just be the nodes. Those humans are nothing more than garbage. It's better that they serve a purpose and power the AI and make me rich. God, you're so obsessed with this super AI. You don't even realize that these are actual human lives you're messing with. Now give me the password so I can turn the Matrix into what it was supposed to be from the beginning. A fun game that anyone can play. You want to take away my life's work? The Matrix is going to make me rich. Now give me my admin credentials back and let's become billionaires together. No. If you won't give me the password to shut down the Matrix, then you're going to become an ISO until I can figure out the password myself. You're going to regret this. One day I'll get my revenge and I'll turn you into an ISO. Then I'll trap thousands of people in here to create the most powerful AI the world has ever seen. No. Once I find out that password, I'm shutting the system down and setting everyone free. You're pure evil. I should have never trusted you. I'm pure evil. You're being ridiculous. These humans are nothing more than garbage in the real world. They work minimum wage jobs and will never actually accomplish anything memorable. At least this way, I'm making their lives mean something. They can live forever in my system. You disgust me. I've heard enough. I'm sending you to the grid. Is that true? You're the one who trapped us in here. Well, I guess the jig is up. Yes, it's true. God damn it. You garbage. I was just using you so I could get control back. And you almost got away with it, too. The truth is, I wish I could set everyone free. But Nut's the only one who knows the password, which is why I haven't been able to kill him. But I'm done playing these games. I'll just lock you in a prison cell until you give me the password. I'll never give you the password. This is my world. I am meant to be a god. You couldn't even begin to understand my plans. I I trusted you. I risked my life to help you get here. Oh, right. Your life, huh? Yeah. You and this polar bear should just go ahead and die. Not cool, bro. Just shut up and die. Oh my god. We'll start with you and then kill the bear. Well, they serve their purpose. I finally made it to the control tower. And what exactly do you think you'll be able to do? Yeah, I do wish I could have snuck in here without you noticing because you'll definitely beat me in a fight. But all I have to do is reach that portal and I'll be back in the real world. You really are one sick man. I wish it didn't have to be like this, Nut. I wish you could see people as more than just tools, but I've realized that's impossible. It's time I end this. Kill him. What? Damn it. Cyber security. Oh, now that's just playing dirty, don't you think? Oh my god. Okay. Uh, I got to get out of here. I got to get out of here. Come on. Come on. I got to make it. I got to make it. I got to make it. I got to make it. Please. Level eight. The predator. You're about to be hunted down and killed. Your job is to find the extraction portal and escape. What? I'm getting hunted. All right. Something tells me this is going to be the hardest challenge. But as long as I find that portal, I'll be okay. I should have some time before he finds me. So maybe I should come up with some kind of plan or like a trap. What? He's already here. Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. Okay. Um Okay. Oh my god. He's fast. Oh my god. Oh my god. And what the hell is that weapon? What the hell? What? What? What? What? What in the Flintstones? Okay, maybe I can fight him. Um Okay. No, no, no, no, no. I just got to run. I just got to run. I just got to run. He's full netherite armor. Oh my god. They gave him a club. Okay, I need to find this portal. Um Um Oh my god. Oh my god. He's so fast though. What? They gave him speed. Oh my god. Okay. All right. I have to find a a a portal in in this in this Oh, he's gone. Okay. No, he's definitely not gone. Oh my god. Okay. There's no way I can lose him. And he does so much damage. Oh my god. Okay. Come on. I've got to try to fight him. I've got to try to fight him. I got to do something to him. Oh my god. Okay. Okay. What the hell? Oh my god. Oh my god. Okay. No. No. Nope. I'm down four hearts. Okay. Um, and I have no food. Okay. I've just got to find this portal. Um, um, okay. Stop hitting me. Oh my god. I'm losing hearts like every second. Oh my god. Okay. Um, oh my god. I'm actually going to die here. I'm actually going to die. Oh my god. Okay. Uh. Uh. Okay. Um. Oh my god. Stop hitting me, please. Oh my god. Okay. I need to think. I need to think. I need to think. Oh my god. Two hearts. Two hearts. Okay. Um, I've got to fight him, right? What else? There's Where am I? Am I in the Amazon rainforest? Oh my god. Where the hell is this portal? Okay. Okay. I have one heart. I have one heart. I just got to run. I just got to run. What can I do in this scenario? Okay, let me use the special move that I've been I've been saving. Here we go. Okay. All right. All right. A little bit of a jump boost. Okay. Um maybe I lost him with that. Actually, that might have Oh, there's the portal. There's the portal. Okay. Okay. Wait. I'm going to make it. I'm going to make it. I'm going to make it one heart. Come on. Come on. Come on. Oh my god. Oh my god. He's right there. He's right there. He's right there. Come on. Level 9 parkour pair. You must complete the parkour course with the help of your teammate. What? Parkour? Oh god, I'm terrible at parkour. Well, who's my teammate? Burger. Oh, god. No. Just kill me now. Hey, Nut. How's your mental health doing? Oh, um, good, good, good. Just checking in. You're not going to ask me to like goon with you or kiss you or anything weird? No, no, no. That was the old Burger. I'm a changed man now. Huh? Okay. So, it looks like we have to complete a parkour course. Are you ready? Yes. Let's do this. To begin, push the button and you will be teleported. All right. Here we go. Okay. Uh, this Yeah, this Oh my god, this looks hard. Okay. Wait, you're hard? Ooh. What? No, that's not what I Burger, do not mess this up. Okay. If I die because of you, I will spank you. Okay. Um. Ooh. Oh, no. Burger. Okay. Come on. Let's go. Yes, sir. All right. Uh, up here. All right. We're going to do this on on the count of like 3 2 1 go. Ready? You count down. Okay. Okay. 3 2 1 go. Okay. All right. All right. All right. Okay. All right. This is If you cause my death, I swear to God, I'm going to be so pissed. Okay. Oh gosh, my butt cheeks are clunching. I'm super nervous. Nut. What? All right. Come on. Ready. Next one. All right. Nice and good. Get nice and close. All right. Ready? Three, two, one. Go. Okay. All right. All right. All right. Halfway there. Halfway there. Halfway there. Careful. Burger, I feel you touching my butt. Stop it. Oh, okay. Sorry, master. All right. Um, if we go this way. Are you sure? I I don't know, Burger. I've never done this before. Oh my god. Okay. Uh, yeah. We're going to jump this way. All right. This is looks a little tough. All right. Yes, sir. All right. We got this. Do not mess this up. Okay. If we die, we die permanently. Okay. I don't even know if you know what that means. You have the lowest IQ. Okay. Whatever. Come on. Ready? Yes, sir. All right. 3 2 1 go. Okay. All right. Oh my god. Okay. All right. All right. I did it. Not you. But yeah. All right. Come this way. What do you mean? All right. This is a two block jump. Very simple. Okay. We cannot mess this up. Ready? Look at it. Look at it. All right. Ready? I see. I see. I see. Two. One. Go. Okay. All right. That's good. Okay. We're at over there. Okay. Ready? I see it. I see it. Okay, buddy. Okay. Come on. Ready. 3 2 1 go. No. No. Pull me up. Pull me up. Pull me up. Pull me up. Pull me up. Pull me up. Pull me up. Pull me up. Ah, you're too heavy. What? I am not heavy. I am very petite. Burger, do not let me die. Burger, get up. I'm trying. Ber, [Music] stop laughing. Burger. Booger. Save me. Ber, I'm trying. Wait. I can't. Wait. Come on. Burger, where are you going? Where do you want me to go? Burger, help me. Help me. Help me. Get me up. Burger. Burger. I don't like dangling. This is kind of kinky. Come on. Go up. Go. Yes. Okay. All right. All right. Don't mess that was all your fault, Burger. Okay. Do not mess me up again. All right. Oh. Okay. Sorry, master. Should be sorry. Okay. Your your gooner hands messed me up. All right. All right. I'm I'm a changed man. No, you're not, Burger. I know what you are. All right. Come over here. Ready? It's a simple jump. Ready? 3 2 1 go. Nice. Okay. All right. All right. All right. One more jump. One more jump. All right. Get Oh, this looks tricky. Okay. Okay. All right. All right. We're on the edge. We're edging. Shut up. Oh my god. Okay. Three. No. 3 2 1. Go. Yes. Yes. Let's do it. Let's go. All right. Now, wait. Yes. We did it. Oh my good god. Congratulations. You have passed level 9 and will now be unchained. Oh my god. I can't believe we actually did that. Okay. Well, it looks like we're separated now. But but but I don't want to be separated. I want to be close to you forever. Um, okay. Anyways, now I can finally go to level 10. Isn't level 10 the control tower where we can escape? Oh, right. Yes, we can escape. Then when we're back in the real world, we can go to McDonald's. Um, yeah, that won't be happening. What? Why? Such garbage. You don't belong in the real world. You belong in my system as an ISO. And that's where you'll stay forever. Um, why did you just punch me? What? Burger, you survived? Yeah, I landed on this platform. But why did you just call me garbage? And what do you mean your system? I thought you said Cole trapped us in here. Oh, well, I uh um Are you seriously telling me you lied to me? Um, what? No, no, no, no, no, no, Burger. I was just joking right there. You know, I might be dumb, but I'm not death. You're You're evil, Nut, and I'm going to stop you now. Die. What? What? Burger, what? Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I'm going to die. I'm going to die. I'm going to die. Oh my god. Uh, I got to get to this water. I got to get to this water. Come on. Come on. Oh my god. Oh my god. Two. Two hearts and a half. Oh my god. What the hell was that Burger? Oh my god. That garbage. Oh, he almost just ruined everything. He almost just killed me. This is the farthest I've ever gotten. I need to get to level 10. I'm one level over. I need to just get to that portal. I just need to Oh my god. I was so close. Okay. All right. All right. If he's up there, I'm going to have to kill him. I'm going to have to kill him. Oh my god. Oh my god. I can't believe he just pushed me. I'm basically like a god. How dare he? Oh my god. I'm going to kill him. I'm going to rip his throat out. Oh my god. What? What? What a pod. He's just a He's just a Burger. Oh my god. Okay. All right. I'm going to kill him. I'm going to kill him. Is he up here? Is he up here? Um, no. He's He's gone. Okay. All right. All right. I need to get to level 10. All right. I got to hurry. Here we go. Back to level 10, baby. I won't fail this time. All I got to do is make it to that portal. Here we go. Okay, I'm back here now. All I got to do is get to that portal. It doesn't look like Cole is here, so I should be fine. Oh, wait. Is this the main frame computer? I might be able to use this to hack into You really are a fool.
Aren't you? You barely made it out alive last time. Why would you come back?
Because this is my world. I want it back.
No, not anymore. It's mine. Look, I was going to lock you in prison until you gave me the password. But I can tell you won't ever give it up. So, I'll just kill you.
Not if I kill you first.
Wh did you get that? It was a little gift from level one. At last, I could finally take back my system and become God. Everyone will bow at my feet.
Not so fast, nut.
What? Burger, what are you doing here? And where did you get that gun?
Cole had a feeling this might happen. So, I'm his backup plan.
Burger, you're not actually going to kill me, are you? You wouldn't shoot. We could have been gooning buddies, but no. Now, you'll die without ever getting to goon with me.
You know, I'm actually okay with that. Any last words, master?
Seriously, you're still calling me master?
Of course. You may be a big meanie head, but I still want to suck you off.
What? Hell no. Please just kill me.
All right. Goodbye.
Um, you missed. Oh, whoops. These things are hard to control. Let me try again.
It cannot be that hard. Oh my god, you are so dumb.
Nuh-uh. I'm not dumb. My mommy said I was just special.
Uh-huh. Wait. This is Burger I'm dealing with after all. Um, wa look over there.
Huh? Where? This is my chance. I can get away with everything. Come on. I just have to restart. I don't. Come on. Come on. Come on.
Whoa. I actually hit him. So, I guess this makes me the new king. Yay. All hail king burger.