How to get over heartbreak FAST

If you're crying over losing a partner right now, exiting a relationship, I want you to take pen and paper. I want you to write down in one section all the good things that he's done for you. Did he say nice words? Was he loyal? Are you flowers, whatever, like all the good things. And then the bad things. Okay? Then I want you to look at that paper. And if the bad column is way longer than the good one, I want you to fold the paper like this. Okay? Fold the paper. And then I want you to start drying your tears. Okay? Then I want you to go to the bathroom and I want you to take a deep look in the mirror and I want you to ask yourself, why am I crying over losing a problem? Cuz honey, you did not have a partner. You had a problem.

Hi guys, my name is and welcome back to my channel. In this video I will show you how to get over heartbreak very fast because honestly in my life I've always gotten over things very fast especially in a relationship. I've done some things that I feel like really helped me and help can help you too.

First thing I want you to ask yourself is was the relationship genuinely good? We have this psychological phenomenon. It's called rosy retrospection. So what our brain basically does in any situation that involves loss like loss of a friendship, loss of a job, loss of a partner, what your brain is going to do is remember the more positive memories because it's like a coping mechanism for the brain to just make you feel better. Now you have to genuinely be honest with yourself and get out of that emotional state and be like, hm, let me actually reflect on the relationship.

What I for example did with my uh recent ex right now when I just found out about the cheating I was like for two days in very much shock because this person portrayed themselves as someone that they weren't. So now I have to question who did I sleep next to for the past year you know like who is this person actually? So then when I started really reflecting on the relationship I was like it wasn't that good. I felt suffocated. I had all these things and I'm like the relationship wasn't good. So, I honestly got what I wanted. And I remember the first time that I saw him again uh was in London. That was like 3 4 weeks after this all had happened. And we sat down and we had a conversation. And I looked at him and I said, you know, I'm so grateful that you did this because you allowed me to step out of this relationship because I'm the kind of person I am very patient with a partner and I don't like to date around. I will stick to one partner and even if like things happen where I'm like oh that's a red flag but it's not that bad so then I stay after only a shocking things happen or something where I'm like oh that I can definitely not accept. I feel like I give myself permission to leave cuz otherwise I constantly feel bad for the person. I feel like I'm abandoning them. You know ask yourself like was the relationship genuinely good or are you literally like talking yourself into thinking that it was genuinely good? Cuz if it was that good why did it end? like what was the reason that it ended?

Another thing you should ask yourself is are you heartbroken or is your ego hurt? So when our ego is hurt, we normally look at our self-worth. Okay? We feel like we weren't worthy enough or that person didn't view us as highly as we thought they would or love us as much. But I can honestly tell you honey, listen to me. It was not about you. If a person did something bad to you or if they cheated on you or did whatever, there is nothing you could have done that that person would not have done that. That is their character. And you shouldn't take their character and put it on yourself and be like, "This defines me." No, it doesn't define you. Like if you were genuinely good with them, if you were honest, if you were loyal and they did you like that, then there's nothing you could have done. You could have like literally controlled them more, did this more, did that more, whatever. They would have still done that. That is in their character. You have to think like, oh my god, someone that wants to hurt someone in that kind of way. How do they think? Have to be very, very selfish first of all, and you have to be so inconsiderate of your partner to do that. So, they just didn't consider you, and they won't consider the next person. That is the pattern. That is who they are.

Like for example, when my dad cheated on my mom for like the 7,000th time, but then this time he actually got married to another woman and he left. He called her and he was like, "Look, I still want you back. I still want to be with you." And my mom was on the phone and she told him, "Listen, I do not feel any sadness that you left cuz you are a problem and you are a problem that has left." And she said, "I feel bad for your new wife because you did not leave with a new personality. you left with the same personality that you have." And guess what, guys? My oldest brother, he's the only one that still talks to my dad. Um, and he's around him. He told us, dad has like two daughters now and a son, two young daughters. He told us the way he abuses this woman is really not normal. And these little daughters of that new wife go to my dad and they say, "B, why do you do this to our mom?" And I'm literally thinking to myself, you're out here traumatizing every single child. Like, how is this normal? This is not normal. But look, he never changed. He just switched the woman, but his character stayed the same.

Also, as you guys know, like I said in the last video, I have joined BetterHelp myself. I already had two sessions with my therapist from BetterHelp, and she actually encouraged me to start journaling again. And she told me to write down what did this situation make me feel? What is it really about? And when I was journaling down those emotions, I came to the conclusion that this situation made me feel abandoned. And coming from an abandoned childhood, this was very triggering for me because person that you trust, the person that you sleep with, you never expect them to abandon you, especially if they didn't give you any signs that they would abandon you. So, I really found a lot of hope in talking to my therapist and that is why this video is also sponsored by BetterHelp. If you want to join therapy, but you don't know where to start or you don't know where to begin to find a therapist, you just don't have the energy for it, you can just look up BetterHelp and start with finding a therapist. It is also way cheaper than other therapy options that you have out there. You also get a wide selection of available therapists. They are licensed. They are experienced and they are from a lot of different backgrounds and you can choose which one is the right fit for you. Now if you find that the one that you have matched with is not the right fit, BetterHelp allows you to switch therapists with no additional charge. This would not happen in real life. So, if you think that you might benefit from therapy, then please click the link in the description down below or visit betterhelp.com/wizardlist to get 10% off your first month at BetterHelp.

Another thing is losing a bad person is never a loss. You got protected. God gave you the biggest protection. Even if it takes 10 years, even if it take 20 years, at the end of the day, when you have that switch in your head and you click and you say, you know what, this is what I won't accept anymore. And you walk away or you say like this is the last time you've treated me like that. And you walk away, I applaud you. And honestly, God bless you with opening your eyes cuz a bad person is going to ruin you. And when you are in that relationship, you cannot see that for yourself. you cannot see the future ahead because you're kind of confused in an emotional abusive situation as well. You don't know what's really going on and you start to kind of become like a zombie. But I promise you once you're out of that and once you look back clear eyes you're like what the [ __ ] was I in? What was I doing?

You see when you're around people that just energetically constantly want to take from you. You start to lose yourself. And you will see these people they become more successful. they have this, they have that. But you start to lose your purpose. You don't feel like yourself anymore. You don't even look like yourself anymore. And then you think like, what is going on? But then you step out of that relationship. All of a sudden, your glow is back. Your skin is healing. You look way better. You feel better. You have motivation. You were not the problem then. I promise you, you were not the problem. Don't think like, "Oh my god, I should go back now because maybe it will get better." Honey, if it didn't get better by now, it will not get better. Believe me, I've been around addicts. I have been around people that had certain ways about them that never ever wanted to change. And nothing what I did to try to help them or try to make them change ever did anything. Never. If someone doesn't want to change themselves and if they don't take that necessary steps to change, you will not see a new person. They'll probably die like that. Truly.

Another thing is allow the emotions to come over you. Allow these emotions to purge and process. Reflect on the situation and ask yourself, okay, why do I feel like this right now? You feel immense sadness cuz yeah, it's normal. You just lost a person that you were with every day. Probably you were texting them every day. Like that is hard loss. It's almost like someone died. Someone cheated on you. It's like figuring out that that person never existed. So now you're questioning your own reality because they did something. It's really sad. So what I would suggest then is talk to a friend, talk to a therapist, and talk it over and over and over again. God bless my sister Sabina. I've talked to her about the same situation 10,000 times. Like I was over and over again talking to her about it because I could not understand the shock. I did not see this coming. But that really helped me to get this out of my system. And I come to a point where I was like, okay, I get it now. What I do next is do I allow this or do I not allow this in my life?

Also, for the ones thinking like, you know, maybe if you ask the person that hurt you why they did it, that will make you feel better. Well, honestly, I did that. So, I've talked to my ex so many times. We've had so many conversations that over and over again, I said, why? What was the reason? Every time he gives me a reason, but that did not make me less angry. That did not help. That did not make me want to get back with him or love him. No. From the minute I found this out, the love was gone. Gone. Anything further than this is pure because the child see someone for who they are and the mask has dropped. You cannot unsee that.

Now it's time to focus on yourself. I love going through a breakup personally because I always have the biggest glow up afterwards and any girl that I see whenever they go through a breakup they come out as a baddie. So I'm like, "Okay." So just focus on yourself right now. Like if you want to go to the gym and do whatever you want to do, do that. If you want to do more self-care or work on yourself or whatever, do that. If you just want to focus on regulating your nervous system, on finding new ways to relax, whatever makes you feel good, do that. And don't feel bad for spending money on that or investing in yourself. No honey, this is the time that you should be extra extra nice to yourself. And this is also the time that you should surround yourself with people that truly love you. Love shouldn't only come from a partner. We shouldn't only talk about romantic love cuz honestly romantic love is not the biggest thing in the world. A lot of this romantic love that people talk about is like in the beginning it's so much fun and then it kind of settles down into you love that person as a family member or even as friends. That's how you like go on and and you stay with them. But for example, if you have love from your animals, if you have love from your friends, you have love from your siblings, really be around these people and talk to them. I literally spend so much time with my family, my brothers, my mom, and I'm so grateful to have such a good support system around me because these people make me feel so good about myself. Surround yourself with people that uplift you, that want to see you do good. And if you don't have those people in your life or in your family, go out and find them.

Also, understand that you are not alone in this. The reason that I share these things online and share my whole journey is because I really want people to truly see what I'm going through. And I know that a lot of things I maybe should keep for myself. Like my mom tells me, Liz, why did you say this? Liz, why did you say this? Like don't say these things. But then I remember like what if someone genuinely thinks like me or what if someone is exactly in the situation like me that can help them. Me talking about it can help them and can make them feel related and less lonely. So if I can make one person feel less lonely even though I am literally embarrassing myself a little bit then it's my whole purpose. That's why I do this. I think that's beautiful. If someone can look at my situation and learn from it and not repeat the same mistakes that I make, then that's also very beautiful. I think it's very very vulnerable to come online and share all these things for millions of people. And then obviously you allow yourself to be judged, which I'm fine with that. Everyone is allowed to have their opinion. They don't need to agree with me because I don't agree with some things that I've done myself. So that's that's normal and that's human. There's so many more people that are maybe afraid to speak up about these things. But I think realizing that your situation is not unique and a other people have gone through that and they have gone through that whole process will make you feel a lot better. Also they've gone through it and they've came out of it really good. Okay. So don't worry.

Start adapting the mindset that everything happens in the most divine way. I have always believed this. I have always believed that God is guiding my life and whatever happens needs to happen. Whoever I lose needs to go. I also don't go into relationships thinking like, "Oh my god, this is going to be forever or the all of this forever." I don't believe in forever. I think we all die and then we go home. I just believe that whatever is happening in my life is meant to happen and it's happening for my highest good. Start adapting that mindset. Whenever something happens to you, don't say, "God, why did you do this to me?" Ask yourself, "What is this teaching me? What can I learn from this? and how is God allowing me to grow right now? I really believe that just because I have such a positive outlook on life and I really put a lot of faith in God that my life has always been miraculously always very beautiful. I'm very grateful for that. You know, even though I had a bad childhood, but even coming out of that, if I look back, I'm like, wo, this is God's work cuz how did I even do that? And anytime a situation happens to me, I come out of it 10 times better. And you have to also start believing that for yourself. When something bad happens, you have to be like, "Oh my god, I'm so excited because now some so many good things are going to happen for you." And when you receive those blessing, have immense gratitude.

And last but not least, you will rise regardless. No matter what happens to you, no matter who leaves your life, no matter who bullies you, no matter whoever says whatever about you, you will rise. And every person that has done you badly will have to watch you rise cuz God will put you right back together in front of the people that broke you. I promise you that. I have not one time seen people that have been done dirty that had good intentions or that just really were good to a person that did not rise after that. You will rise again and again. This is not the first time something bad has happened. This will not be the last time that something bad has happened. But at the end of the day, when you still have yourself, that is when you have won. At the end of the day, when you come home and you look in the mirror and you still hold your head high, that is when you have won. No matter what happens, everyone will always have to watch you rise. And that will be your revenge. Just creating a better life for yourself, leveling yourself up is the biggest revenge. You don't need to do them like they did you? Cuz going down to their level, why go down? It's only up from here, honey.

Anyways, guys, I hope this video helped someone and you enjoyed this video. I love you guys so much and thank you so much for the love. Thank you so much for the support. You guys are so so nice to me and so sweet to me. And the literally the love that I've received from you guys is another reason why I feel so good. I feel so happy and thank God that my stress and everything is not that.