Transcription
My life is going to hell. I had just gotten home from work when my wife of 12 years, Lisa, started yelling at me. I waited for this moment because I knew it would come one day. In an effort to be completely honest, my wife had a right to be furious with me. I cheated on her, but in my defense, I will say that she cheated on me, and her cheating began at least 6 months before mine. And if I knew about Lisa's infidelity for many years, then she obviously only now found out about about mine. As soon as I opened the front door, Lisa screamed at the top of her lungs, "You pig!"
From that moment on, the conversation went downhill. In fact, as I recall, Lisa's opening words were the kindest things she said about me during her tirade. Although I only caught every third word, it was very clear that Lisa had found out that I had a special friend, and she was not very happy. Even if I had managed to get a word in edgewise, I couldn't think of anything to say to calm the situation, so I just stood there, staring at the floor, waiting for the storm to subside.
Finally, when Lisa calmed down, she said, "Well, what can you say in your defense? Why don't I just file for divorce?"
"Well, for starters," I said softly, "I know you've been having an affair for the last 9 years, so I agree we should probably get a divorce."
"What? What are you talking about?" Lisa was stunned, and the color disappeared from her face. After rummaging through my briefcase, I pulled out several photographs, which I handed to Lisa. These were photographs of her infidelity. I didn't know what to expect, but what I received completely surprised me. I must explain that Lisa is incredibly rich and can send an army of lawyers against me, but instead of the explosion of anger I expected, Lisa dropped the photographs and began to sob. She then looked at me with an expression of complete agony and loss.
"What she said next completely stunned me. 'I don't want a divorce. I love you.'" She then ran into our bedroom. Her reaction stunned me and left me even more confused than usual.
Lisa is the most beautiful woman I have ever known. Even in my wildest fantasies, I never imagined that we would ever end up together, and when we got married, I expected that Lisa would get tired of our relationship and within a year or two would kick me to the curb. One of the peculiarities of our marriage was that Lisa's family was incredibly rich and insisted on a prenuptial agreement. I, of course, agreed. However, one point almost made me leave. Lisa insisted that the prenuptial agreement specified that there would be no children from this marriage, and I eventually agreed. I thought about this point for a long, long time, but by that time, I was hopelessly in love with Lisa. However, by the end of this story, I had four children. Did I mention that my life was completely ruined?
I suppose I should give a little background on all this. Lisa Gravois is my wife. My name is David Toddman. Obviously, my wife didn't take my last name. In short, Lisa's family owns one of the most exclusive perfume companies in the world, and the family name is a brand. And since Lisa is the co-owner of this business, Gravois's sense, it made sense for her to keep her maiden name. At first, I wasn't crazy about the idea, but over the years, I've grown to really like it. Since Lisa kept her last name and I kept mine, many people do not know that we are married. This gives me a certain amount of anonymity.
When we got married, I couldn't believe Lisa chose me. She was a stunning beauty and still is. Lisa is almost 5 ft tall with long black hair and the brightest blue eyes you've ever seen. She had the figure of a model with slightly larger breasts. In fact, Lisa worked as a model for some time during her teenage years. I look good, but I'm not a movie star. I'm a little taller than her. I have sandy hair, and I keep myself in shape. Regardless, Lisa was way out of my league, and I knew it.
I met Lisa at a party thrown by my college roommate and his wife in the Hamptons. He traded commodities and was successful. His wife, Beth, attended Vassar with Lisa, and they were very close friends. When I was introduced to Lisa, I was duly impressed, as were all the other men in the room. She simply radiated sexuality and beauty. All the single guys, and most of the married guys, were drooling, but like I said, she was out of my league, so I started chatting with other single women in the room. I have a friend who once advised me to to only date girls in my league or even poach girls from a lower league. Otherwise, you will waste your evening talking to a woman who is about to leave with someone else.
However, every time I turned that evening, Lisa seemed to be at my elbow. The first few times, I chalked it up to coincidence, but by the fourth time, it became clear that Lisa was interested in me. I was flattered, but at the same time, felt awkward. I figured she was looking for some fun, and when she got tired of me, she would throw me back. I had no interest in being someone's pet for a month. Perhaps this was her plan, but I did not allow myself to discuss it. However, after that party, Lisa stalked me. Like I said, I'm a pretty nice guy, but what the hell did Lisa Gravois want with me? I was just a software salesman. Don't get me wrong, I'm a damn good software salesman, and after just 4 years of working at in one company, I became one of the senior sales directors with a salary of around $5,000,000, but this is nothing compared to what Lisa earns. Her salary, excluding bonuses, is $40 million a year, so I think you can understand why I decided that Lisa was just playing with me. Perhaps my disinterest spurred Lisa on, but in the end, she wore me down. It took her 4 weeks to convince me to go on a date with her. It was 6 months before we slept together, and a little over a year before we got married. It was a shamefully extravagant wedding. There were 600 guests, and I heard it cost about $6 million. Of course, her family insisted that I sign a prenuptial agreement. I know that Lisa was embarrassed to ask me about this, but I had no objections. I understood the need for it, and besides, I made good money myself, so I didn't care about her money. And yet, when I agreed to sign the contract, Lisa was incredibly happy. Happy? She told me that her family would disown her if she married me without a contract, but according to Lisa, she was going to marry me come hell or high water.
However, I couldn't help but wonder how long our marriage would last. According to the prenuptial agreement, if we divorce before 3 years, I will only receive $500,000. This completely amazed me. I've never heard anyone put the word "only" in front of $500,000. But things got better. Each year that we remained married for more than 3 years, I received an additional $500,000, or a pro-rated share for the percentage of the year that we remained husband and wife. In the event of a divorce, Lisa could not make any claims to my assets. On the other hand, I also could not make any claims to her assets. But the best part of this whole arrangement was that I could sleep with the most beautiful woman in the world, and if she threw me out on the street, I would get at least $500,000.
Of course, the marriage contract stated that we both agreed to refuse to have children. Although I eventually agreed to this condition, Lisa's parents were adamantly unhappy with the no children clause. But Lisa did not have a close relationship with her parents. Apparently, she only saw them at board meetings and claimed that they liked her brothers better than her. Besides, she already had a battle with them about not having children many years ago. It's no surprise that over the years, we've seen very few of of them, and when they came to visit, it was very awkward, especially for me, because they looked at me as something lower than pawn scum.
I have to say that the first three years of marriage were truly wonderful. I truly believe that in those blissful years, she truly loved me. But soon after the third anniversary of our marriage, I discovered that Lisa was cheating on me. Our marriage was truly unconventional. Lisa traveled a lot on company business. I'd say she was gone for about a week out of every month, and in the first years, whenever possible, I often traveled with her. Sometimes she would be home for 5 or 6 weeks at a time, but that was rare. However, every time she returned home, she would drive me to exhaustion in the bedroom.
My discovery of Lisa's infidelities began with a photograph in the newspaper. Since Lisa is a celebrity, she is often mentioned or illustrated in the gossip pages, so I religiously scanned that section of the newspaper every day. One particular day, I just glanced at a photo from a party in Paris and almost missed it. In the end, it took a magnifying glass to confirm what I thought was in the photo. On the right side of this particular photo, I saw someone who looked like Lisa. I confirmed this with a magnifying glass. So, you're probably saying, "What's the big deal?" This was important because at that particular moment, Lisa was supposed to be in Japan negotiating for for the company. However, there could be many reasons why Lisa was in Paris, but I couldn't figure out why she changed her trip and didn't tell me about it. However, I needed to know more. It could have been a simple last-minute mistake in her schedule, but I had to find out what was going on.
When we first got married, Lisa asked me to quit my job so I could travel with her. I told her I didn't want to be kept. Eventually, she stopped asking. One of the things about being married in a family like Lisa's is is that you have virtually unlimited resources. However, I didn't want to use Lisa's money because I knew she was very meticulous and would know if I did. But I had my own checking account into which my salary was transferred. I mainly use this money to buy Lisa birthday and Christmas gifts. It's not an easy task when you're shopping for someone who has everything. It exhausted me to death. I could neither sleep nor eat. I needed to know what was going on, so I used my personal funds and hired a private investigator. However, even while doing this, I had to be careful. I chose firms that I knew Gravois had never used before, a reputable firm in St. Louis.
After I discovered the photo in the newspaper, I realized that Lisa's work schedule required her to travel much more often than when we first got married. With the new schedule, she was away for an average of two weeks out of every month. However, I was puzzled because our sex life was still great. Lisa always seemed genuinely upset when she had to leave and very happy when she returned. I almost convinced myself that I was paranoid. Anyway, a month later, I learned that I wasn't being paranoid. I got the report with the scans, and it was [ __ ] painful. I have never experienced such pain. In the private investigator's report, Lisa's lover was named as Gerard L'Evêque, whose family was in the banking business. They owned banks throughout Europe, and Gerard was president of the family holding company. Lisa and Gerard grew up together, and at one time, everyone thought they would get married, but then Gerard and Lisa broke up. Lisa married me, and Gerard married a Greek woman named Teresa Apis. Teresa's father was very passionate about shipping. Gerard and Teresa had three children. According to the private investigator's report, Gerard and Lisa broke up because he wanted children, and Lisa absolutely did not want them. Apparently, Gerard's family threatened to disinherit him if he agreed to Lisa's demand not to have children. Then I read in the report that Gerard's wife died 6 months ago, so now Gerard was free and could be with Lisa.
I walked around depressed for 5 days, trying to understand what was happening. It's obvious that Gerard was Lisa's first love, and they apparently rekindled their relationship. I didn't understand why, why Lisa didn't file for divorce. In fact, I was completely confused because every time she came home, Lisa would smother me with love. If I didn't know better, I would swear that this woman only loves me. Not only did Lisa seem genuinely excited to see me, but our lovemaking was absolutely amazing. You're starting to realize how shitty my life has been, but it's only going to get worse.
My first reaction to the private investigator's report was to meet with Lisa and divorce her, but I thought long and hard about it and came up with three reasons that kept me from doing it. First of all, I still loved Lisa, and when we were together, I felt that she really loved me. Secondly, the sex was mind-blowing, and finally, the marriage contract. From a purely financial standpoint, I earned $370 for every day I was married to Lisa. I finally decided what I would do after Lisa tried to destroy me with sex before flying off on another trip. In my mind, I said, "To hell with everything. I'll stay married, but I won't be faithful." Even after making this decision, I kept wondering whether I could really cheat on Lisa.
One day, as I was pondering my dilemma, one of my sales associates came into my office. Her name was Thelma Johnson, and she was quite an attractive woman. Thelma wasn't even close to Lisa's level, but she had a hot body and a warm, friendly personality. While Thelma was a solid 8 and a half, Lisa was an 11 or 12. "David, you've been distracted all week," she told me. "Is there anything I can do to help?" I really liked Thelma, and she was a great salesperson. She recently divorced her husband after she caught him cheating. I was surprised that she wasn't as upset about the divorce as I thought. Thelma worked closely with me for over 6 months to secure the contract with Harris Enterprise. This contract provided us with a bonus for the year. I knew Thelma cared about me, but we had always had a professional relationship. However, Thelma was a good listener, so I decided to talk to her about my dilemma with Lisa. "Yes, I admitted, I'm confused. I just found out that Lisa is cheating on me. The question I'm struggling with is, should I divorce her or ignore her?"
"That shouldn't be a problem," Thelma said quickly. "Divorce this [ __ ] and move on with your life."
"It's not that simple," I explained. "I signed a marriage contract with Lisa. Every year I remain married married to Lisa, I receive $500,000. This means that every day I'm married, I earn about $400, which is not small change." Then I listed all the other perks that could come with being married to Lisa: fancy cars, parties, clothes, expensive watches, and travel on the company jet. Thelma acknowledged that this was indeed something that needed to be carefully considered. She promised to think about it that evening and let me know if she came up with anything.
The next day, I was still thinking about my problem when Thelma walked into my office and closed the door. "I think I have a solution to your problem," she said, sitting down opposite me.
"Really? What do you think I should do with Lisa?" I asked.
"I think you should stay with her," Thelma replied, "and continued with some changes."
"Oh, and what changes should I make?" I asked, smiling. I was sure that Thelma would suggest that I stay married and just cheat on Lisa. I admit that I was leaning more and more in this direction, but I still had not convinced myself that I should decide to cheat. Although I still loved Lisa, her betrayal hurt me deeply, and I found it difficult to cope with. But what Thelma suggested shook me to my core.
"Like I said, I think you should stay married to Lisa, but you should have your own affair."
I raised my hand to stop her from continuing. "I've already thought thought about this."
"No," Thelma interrupted, "my plan includes more than that. Please let me explain and let me finish before you throw me out of your office."
"Okay," I said, raising my hands in her direction. "The floor is yours."
"David, I think you are struggling with this decision for two reasons," Thelma began. "Firstly, because despite what Lisa did, you still love her. You can't imagine life without her. Besides, although you've thought a lot about having an affair of your own, it doesn't satisfy you in one important way. You told me several times that you really want to have children. This means that just affairs do not solve this desire of yours. Yes, you could get your mistress pregnant, but that would be messy and would almost certainly end your marriage to Lisa."
"All this is true," I intervened, "but I don't see how it will help me solve my problem."
"I believe I can be the solution," Thelma said, smiling warmly at me.
"What are you offering?"
"To become my mistress," technically, yes," she said with a sly smile, "but I want much more."
"I'm not sure I like the sound of that," I said worriedly.
"No, no, David, let me finish," I nodded for her to continue. "You've known me since before you and Lisa got married," Thelma continued. "I know you think that Lisa married below her level, but I never thought so. She's damn lucky to have you, and she's is just a fool to risk losing you. But since Lisa decided to be an idiot, I'm not going to miss this opportunity. You know that my dating history was, to put it mildly, sad. I always ended up with the worst men. I had great fears even before my wedding last year. I felt that Fred and I were not right for each other, but outwardly, he seemed kind and loving. It was only after the wedding that I found out that he was jealous and controlling, and on top of that, a cheater."
I simply nodded and let Thelma continue. "I've always been attracted to you, but you never seemed interested in me. We've been good friends for years, but you never thought about me in a romantic way. I accepted it, and I knew I could never compete when Lisa came on the scene. But Lisa has allowed the door to open slightly, and I intend to see if I can get in before it closes."
So far, Thelma's explanations have said nothing about how her plan differs from simply taking a mistress. "The two things you said you want concern Lisa and having children. You are terribly hurt by Lisa's betrayal, and you want to strike back at her. At the same time, although you have not attached much importance to it, it is clear to me that you want to have children. I can provide both. After the disaster of my marriage, I decided that I never wanted to get married again. However, I desperately want to have children. I propose to become your mistress and bear you children. I know that you don't love me, but I think that you care about me. We will keep our affair a secret, which will allow you to remain married to Lisa. At the same time, I will have your children. We both win."
I'd be lying if I didn't admit that I was shocked and intrigued by what Thelma had to offer. It was complete nonsense, but I liked the idea. However, I could see difficulties with this agreement, so I started listing some of them. "First of all," thank you for this offer," I said kindly. "I am truly flattered, and this is much more generous than I have any right to expect, but I see several problems. Finances would be difficult than raising children, naming children, and what if in the future you decide you want to get married?"
"I ran into the same problems," Thelma admitted, "but let me try to solve them. As for finances, I own my own home. All I would like to ask is that we share the costs of the children. On birth certificate certificates, I would list your name as the father, but until you decide otherwise, they will use my last name. Although I don't think I'll want to get married in the future, I'm wise enough to know that you can never say never. Therefore, I propose to enter into a written agreement. In this agreement, we will include a clause that will allow either of us to terminate the agreement with 6 months' notice. If I remarry, you will have the right to decide on custody. If you decide to end our agreement, I will have custody of the children, but you will have liberal visitation rights. In any case, you will still be recognized as the father."
We sat and looked at each other, but neither of us said anything right away. Finally, I broke the silence. "I must admit that I am very intrigued by your proposal. However, I'm not ready for this yet. Why don't we go on a few dates to see if we're right for each other?" Thelma agreed, and we started dating. The first few dates were just dinner and dancing. Then we had dinner and went to the theater. I found that dating Thelma was fun. She was warm and funny. This, of course, was much nicer than sitting at home and waiting for Lisa to return from one of her trips.
On our fifth date, we hugged tightly in the car as I drove Thelma home. After the sixth date, Thelma said, "We definitely compatible on our dates. Now let's check if we are compatible in bed." Sex with Lisa could be mind-blowing, so I didn't know what to expect from Thelma. As we undressed, I realized that Thelma, when she was naked, was closer to a nine. Thelma was shorter than Lisa and fuller, but her body was very soft and sexy. We made three rounds before I headed home. I thought I would feel guilty for cheating on Lisa, but I don't. In fact, communicating with Thelma somewhat softened my wounded pride.
The next day, Thelma walked into my office beaming, closing the door. She walked around my desk and gave me a searing kiss. "I think after last night, we know we're compatible. So, what do you want to do now?" I was grinning from ear to ear.
"Why don't you find a lawyer who has nothing to do with this company or any of Lisa's companies? Let them draw up an agreement, then we'll see what comes of it." Thelma smiled widely. "I know the perfect lawyer, my brother Tim. He and I are very close. He also knows that I'm a bit flighty and warned me against marrying Fred." So, Thelma left, and I went back to work.
As the days passed, I thought less and less about the idea, and since Thelma didn't mention it, I thought she might have changed her mind. Anyway, I didn't mean to bring this up. Also, I was becoming more and more convinced that I should just divorce Lisa and accept my financial losses. At least it won't be like what happens to most husbands when they get divorced. They end up in a complete mess in every possible way. In many cases, these men deserve to be [ __ ], but in many other cases, it is the wife who deserves to be burned to ashes. In my case, I would at least be left with a lot of money.
Two weeks after our conversation, Thelma walked into my office and closed the door. She placed the completed contract on my desk. "Give him as much time as you want, make any changes you want. If we both agree, we will sign it in front of my brother. He will have the necessary witnesses and a notary." I was surprised because Thelma didn't say a word about the proposal after our night together, and we didn't go on another date. I was sure that the idea was dead, but now the agreement was on my desk. It was amazing how quickly my thoughts turned to taking Thelma as my mistress and having children with her.
Thelma's brother was very attentive. He even raised questions that neither Thelma nor I had ever thought about. I was struck by the question of what would happen to the children if something happened to Thelma or to me. This question chilled me to the bone. Tim's solution was simple: if Thelma died, Tim agreed that he and his wife would raise the children. If I continued to live with Lisa, if at that moment I want to acknowledge the children, I will receive them. If I chose to stay with Lisa, I would still be given full access to any children Thelma and I would have, and if they hadn't already been told, they would have been told that I was their father. If I died, the children's names would be changed to my last name. I would leave them my property, which will be held in trust until they reach the age of 25.
I was still trying to make a decision when Lisa told me on Monday that her travel schedule would increase a bit next year. That decided it for me. The next day, I told Thelma to make an appointment with her brother. The meeting with Thelma's brother, Tim, was very businesslike. Regardless of what he personally thought about this agreement, it was clear that he loved his sister and was willing to do anything to make her happy. "David, you're lucky," Tim said, shaking his head. "I saw pictures of your wife, and she is gorgeous, and my sister is also beautiful. God, I'm jealous." I laughed at Tim's words, but Thelma just looked at her brother. "Gloria is a wonderful woman, and you are damn lucky to have her." "I know, sis, but it would be even better if my secretary wanted such a deal," Tim chuckled and then said quickly, "I'm just kidding. Gloria is more than enough for me." This satisfied Thelma, and she smiled. Then we returned to the agreement.
One of the points of the agreement was that we would try to organize our sexual encounters so that they would take place when Lisa was on business trips. Of course, this had to be changed early on so that we could have sex when Thelma was most fertile. Thelma and I maintained a completely professional relationship in the office. Thelma also told anyone who would listen that she was done with dating but intended to get pregnant artificially. 3 months after we first met, Thelma called me and told me she was pregnant. We maintained our sex life throughout our pregnancy as best we could. When Thelma went into the hospital to give birth, I was a little upset that I couldn't be there, but we both knew that this was simply impossible when Lisa was at home. However, as soon as possible, I was at the hospital to see both Thelma and my son, Gavin. We agreed on a name; it belonged to her grandfather. 18 months later, Jennifer was born, and that's when Thelma asked if I would be willing to let her become a stay-at-home mom. She said she had enough money to last for 5 years, by which time both children would be in school. I told her I was thrilled that she would be able to be with our kids fulltime. I even agreed that I would pay Thelma's mortgage and utilities from a fund I had secretly created. As it turned out, we were not planning to have more children, but one of Lisa's trips occurred during Thelma's ovulation period. Apparently, she had counted the days incorrectly. Anyway, one day she called me in tears and told me she was pregnant. Thelma was afraid that I would be angry with her. Instead, I told her I loved her and all my children. Scotty was born while Lisa was away on a trip, so I was lucky enough to be in the delivery room when my son was born. I was so happy that I floated on a cloud for several days. Before the birth of our third child, Thelma and I decided that we should make sure that we did not have any more children. The question was either I get a vasectomy or Thelma gets her tubes tied. We decided that everything would be decided by a coin toss. It came up heads, and Thelma had her tubes tied.
Life was going great, it seemed to me, until Lisa's travel schedule was suddenly interrupted. This put an end to our plans with Thelma. If Lisa didn't run away to cheat with Gerard, then I felt ridiculous running away to cheat with Thelma. I know it doesn't make sense, but if you think about it, our whole situation doesn't make sense. Until Lisa canceled the trip, she seemed happy, I was happy, and Thelma was ecstatic. As the weeks turned into months, both Lisa and Thelma became more and more upset with me. Lisa wanted me to do even more things with her. She said that we had grown apart and she wanted to reconnect. Thelma was upset and unhappy because we hadn't made love in almost 6 weeks. I still had sex with Lisa, but I felt guilty about it, so sometimes I did it poorly or not at all. My life was completely screwed up, and I didn't know what to do to unravel it.
That day, I came home and discovered that Lisa had found out about my betrayal. "I think you're right, we should probably get a divorce," I said, relieved that this might be a way out of my predicament. Lisa looked at me in complete shock and burst into tears. Lisa said she loved me and didn't want to get a divorce and ran into our bedroom. Her reaction took me by surprise, so I followed her to continue the conversation and found her face down on our bed, crying. I sat down next to her and pulled her towards me. "You were right, Lisa. We have been moving away from each other for many years."
"I thought you wanted a divorce."
"No, I don't want a divorce," she was able to say.
"Then why did you bring this up?" I asked, completely confused.
"I thought this would shock you and make you realize that we need to work on our marriage," Lisa said between sobs.
"Oh," I said, struggling with what to say next. "Listen, Lisa," I said nervously, running my fingers through my hair. "I've known about your affair with Gerard for years. I just thought that now you are ready to commit to each other."
"Oh God, no," she gasped. "Why didn't you ever say anything?"
"At first, I was so hurt that I intended to talk to you and ask for a divorce," I explained. "But the more I thought about it, the more I realized that I would be hurting myself financially. But even more than that, I still loved you very much. However, I was in so much pain that I was almost ready to start divorce proceedings. But then a woman in my office convinced me that there was another way."
Lisa had a hard time comprehending this whole situation. Until today, she never suspected that I knew about her affair, and until recently, she had no hint of mine. "So, you have a mistress?" Lisa was crying, tears flowing down her cheeks. "You are so cruel. Get out and leave me alone."
With every minute, the situation became more and more incredible. Why the hell was she mad at me for having an affair when she started having an affair before me? I decided this was the perfect opportunity to make a quick getaway and spend some time with Thelma and the kids. The situation was so bad that I couldn't believe it could get any worse, but I was wrong. When I showed up at Thelma's, she attacked me. Before I could explain what was happening, she pulled me into the bedroom. We finally spoke when Thelma got hers. "I thought you had lost interest in me," she said meekly. "Now that Lisa was around all the time, I decided that I no longer needed you. I was going crazy thinking about how I would live without you."
I then told Thelma about the strange conversation with Lisa and her emotional outburst. This, in turn, made Thelma cry. My head was spinning so quickly that I felt uncomfortable. "So, why are you crying?" I asked when she finally calmed down a little.
"Because it's obvious that she's still madly in love with you and will do anything to get you back and keep you."
"That doesn't make any sense," I protested. "First of all, Lisa told me to get out. Secondly, she has been happy in other respects for eight or nine years. How can she be in love with me?"
"I don't know," Thelma cried, "but something has changed, and she definitely wants to keep you. This is unfair. She left you, and I want you. Nothing made sense anymore." So I kissed Thelma, made love to her again, and then went to bed. In the morning, we made love again, and I went to the office. Maybe there I can sort out the mess my life has become.
When I arrived at work, Lisa was sitting in my office and did not look happy. "Good morning, Lisa," I said uncertainly. "I don't remember you coming to my office before, so why are you here today?"
"You know perfectly well why I'm here," Lisa snapped. "We need to discuss your novel." With that, I quickly closed the door and returned to my chair. "Okay, what do you want to discuss?"
"First of all, who is she?"
"Her name is Thelma Johnson, and she used to work for me."
"Wait, didn't you put a private investigator on me or something?"
"No, one of my friends saw you kissing in a restaurant the other day. My friend tried to follow your girlfriend after you gave her a passionate kiss, but he lost her. Do you intend to continue dating her?"
"Oh God," was all I could think of to say. "Well, do you intend to continue dating her?"
"Lisa, you won't like what I tell you, but you have to hear it. After I tell you everything, I think you will agree that we need to get a divorce." Sadness appeared in Lisa's eyes, but she nodded.
"If you had continued to go on your trips, we wouldn't be having this conversation," I began.
"What do my trips have to do with this?" Lisa asked sharply.
"I told you that I know about your affair, Lisa," I said sharply. "I know that you met Gerard during your travels, so Thelma and I got together while you were away. You know what's good for the goose is good for the goose." My attempt at humor went over like a hot air balloon, so I decided to continue. "I decided that since you are having an affair, then so am I. I tried to limit my sexual encounters to only those times when you were not at home, but we had extra classes when Thelma was fertile so she could get pregnant."
"Do you have a child?" Lisa shouted, jumping to her feet.
"Please be quiet and sit down," I demanded. "No, we don't have a child. We have three children. Before you start, you know that I always wanted to have children, and you didn't."
After several long minutes during which I tried to get an answer from Lisa, she said, "It's clear. I need to think about all this." With these words, she got up and left. I figured it would take the company lawyers a day, maybe two, to prepare the divorce papers. At that time, I decided not to take the risk. Since Lisa was angry and stayed with Thelma, this night with Thelma was a welcome relief, and yes, I loved every minute of it. But the next morning, Lisa called me at the office. I assumed it was a courtesy call to let me know that the divorce papers were on their way. However, what Lisa had to say was the last thing I expected in this world. She wanted to meet Thelma and my children.
"Listen, Lisa," I said harshly. "I know you're angry at me, and we can argue about whether it's justified, but I won't let you drag my children into this, and I definitely won't let you abuse them or Thelma."
"David," she said calmly, "I swear to all that is holy, I will not do anything to embarrass, offend, humiliate, or in any way harm your children, Thelma, or you. I really want to meet your kids, and I desperately want to talk to Thelma. Plus, I'll have a fully qualified nanny to watch the kids while we talk. After our meeting, if you wish to continue with the divorce, I will more than honor our agreement."
I thought for a moment and decided that meeting with Lisa might be the best way to get things settled as quickly as possible. However, if Lisa did anything to upset my children or Thelma, it could quickly backfire. "Look, I have to ask Thelma," I said, "but if she agrees, when and where do you want to meet?"
"Maybe at our house tomorrow at 10:00 in the morning."
Thelma was not happy about meeting Lisa. She believed that if I saw them side by side, I would understand how much better Lisa was. I just rolled my eyes and told her that would be the fastest way to end the divorce. The next day, I took Thelma and the three children to Lisa's house. I could tell Thelma was completely intimidated by the house and the size of the estate. The kids were excited because I told them there was a pool, a game room, and an ice cream bar. I rang the bell. Instead of entering as usual, I was surprised when Lisa opened the door. There were at least three servants in the house during the day, and they usually answered the door.
"David," Lisa said with a smile, "you don't have to ring a bell to enter your own home." I wasn't sure what kind of reception I would get. I answered meekly. Lisa introduced us to an overweight, middle-aged woman who seemed quite pleasant. "This is Helen," Lisa introduced the nanny. "She is going to take the children to the pool. We'll sit in the kitchen where you can keep an eye on them too." Once in the kitchen, Lisa offered us something to drink. I was desperate for whiskey, but given what we were here for, I asked for a Pepsi. Thelma took a glass of water, and Lisa poured herself a glass of wine. I remember thinking this was unfair. If I had known there were alcoholic drinks on the menu, I would have ordered differently.
"Thelma," Lisa began, "David told me that you two have been together for about 8 years."
"As many as we could," Thelma answered nervously. "David insisted that we meet only during your travels, however, he often stopped by for an hour or two to be with the children. He always managed to be present at all children's parties."
Lisa gave me a strange look. "So, you were happy with David? Don't you want to find someone to be your full-time husband?"
"David is the best man I have ever known," Thelma said authoritatively. "He's a better part-time husband and father than I think 95% of full-time men. So, to answer your question, I don't want a full-time husband. I want everything David is willing to give me."
"I see," said Lisa, and a tear rolled down her face. She quickly wiped it away and turned to me. "David, could you check on your kids and give Thelma and I some time alone?" I looked at Thelma, and although she was very nervous, she nodded at me. I was wearing shorts because I had the day off, so I took off my sandals and dangled my feet into the pool. I watched the splashing children and could not help but regret that Lisa did not want children and cheated on me from time to time. I looked out the kitchen window. At first, it seemed that Lisa was doing all the talking. Then Thelma spoke, and Lisa seemed to cry. Then they took turns talking, and Thelma seemed to be writing. Finally, I saw both women hugging each other and crying. Then Lisa opened one of the doors and asked me to return to the house. I was almost afraid to go. Once inside, I headed to the chair I had occupied earlier. I was curious if there were any other alcoholic drinks on the menu, but decided not to push my luck.
"David," Thelma said, taking my hand, "we have come to an agreement."
"Okay," I said slowly. "Is this something I won't like?"
"We'll let you decide," Lisa said. "Our agreement is to share with you." Let's talk about being caught off guard. I came this morning expecting to discuss the details of Lisa and my divorce, and now they told me that two women in my life want to divide me. I didn't understand.
"Here," I said, pushing my chair back slightly. "Lisa, you've been cheating on me for almost 9 years, and yes, I cheated on you for almost as long, but you started it. I don't understand why you don't want to be with Gerard all the time. If you divorce me, you will be free."
Lisa started crying, and Thelma hit me on the arm. "Why did you hit me?" I demanded. I became even more confused and a little angry because Gerard is dead.
"Thelma said, 'Oh, sorry,' I muttered. 'I did not know.'"
"David, you're right," Lisa admitted. "Gerard was my first love, and I couldn't forget him until I met you. He broke up with me when I told him I didn't want children. I was crushed by his decision, but I refused to back down. About 3 years after our wedding, I met Gerard on one of my trips. His wife died, and he was depressed. I wanted to be there to help him through this difficult time. He really loved Teresa. One way or another, one thing led to another, and we began an affair. Yes, I loved Gerard, but I loved you just as much as I loved him, maybe even more. By the time Gerard had a massive heart attack, he was pressuring me to divorce you and marry him. I told him that I would never leave you. I love you too much now. I won't survive if you leave me, David, and I know that you still love me, even though you had a family with Thelma. So, you know that you can love two people at the same time. Now I understand that I can't have you all the time, but like Thelma, I want everything you are willing to give me."
I exhaled sharply and sank into a chair. I know a lot of guys dream about this, but all I saw was a potential nightmare. Everything in my body screamed that two women wanting the same man was a recipe for disaster. I looked from Lisa to Thelma and then back again. I saw hope and fear in the eyes of both women, so I decided to play dumb.
"And how exactly will this work?" I asked.
In response, Thelma took out a notepad and began looking through the schedule. The agreement was quite detailed, but the gist was that Lisa would stay in the master bedroom. Thelma and the children would live in the North Wing, which had three bedrooms and two bathrooms. I stayed with Thelma overnight on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. I stayed with Lisa on Tuesday, Thursday, and Saturday. On Sunday, I could sleep wherever I wanted. The fact that I slept with one woman or another did not mean that sex would be constant. This was decided between the couples. However, if one of the women decided that she did not want or could not have sex, I was not allowed to sleep with the other. There were many other rules, but this was the basic agreement.
I told them I needed to think about it. I was very skeptical about this whole idea, but both women insisted that it was either cohabitation or nothing. I didn't believe it. I was sure that any of the women would be happy to hire me full time, but then I became paranoid. What if they were serious about sharing or nothing? Would I risk losing both women? Anyway, I had to leave for a business trip the next day, so I told them I would give an answer when I got back. I was surprised that I could work so effectively with such a huge life change looming over my head, but after I completed my contract with Stellar Enterprises and was flying home, I realized why I was able to work on this trip. I've already made my decision. I agreed to the deal.
Thelma returned to her brother to draw up a new agreement. His eyes widened when Thelma told him what was going on. After Thelma finished explaining the deal, his first comment was, "David, I hate you with all my being." Of course, I knew he was joking, so I joked back, "You could still take yourself as a mistress," I suggested, and immediately received a slap from Thelma. "I wouldn't dare," Tim admitted.
The arrangement seemed to be working well until almost 7 months had passed. I can't say that my sex life has become more intense, however, she has become more consistent. I have sex at least three times a week, but sometimes there are four or five. With a nanny looking after the children, Thelma returned to work in my office. Lisa was a little worried at first, but she corrected the situation to her satisfaction. Lisa took Thelma from me by offering her a higher salary and better benefits. Thelma now works for Lisa and seems quite happy. About a week before for the seventh month, these two women grabbed me while I was returning home.
From work, they explained that there was a problem with the contract and it needed to be amended. It flashed through my head, "Lord, what now? Can my life get any worse?" The answer was yes.
Having seated me at the table in the dining room, Lisa immediately explained the essence of the problem. "David, I want to have a baby." I guess, needless to say, I was confused. But now you all understand that this is my usual state of mind when I live with these two women. If I had been wondering for a thousand years what they wanted to talk to me about, I would never have guessed that it would be that Lisa wants to have a child.
"I know I said I didn't want children," Lisa said quietly, "but I see how much fun you have with your children, and I see how much they love you and how much you love them. I want this feeling too." And what should I have said? All I could come up with was, "Okay." This must have been the right answer because both women squealed with happiness, hugging and kissing me.
But then Lisa added, "Besides, David, Thelma and I have discussed this, and we agree that I should not be married to you now." I was in a panic. It sounded like these two women wanted me to knock Lisa up and then they were planning to kick me to the curb. I knew they had become close, but I never expected them to fall in love with each other and want to get rid of me.
"Let me check if I understood everything correctly," I said, looking at Lisa. "You want me to get you pregnant, and then you both kick me to the curb? I don't think I want to be a part of this. If you want to get rid of me, just say so, and I will leave peacefully. However, if you girls think you are going to cut me off from my children, I will fight you to the last."
"What?" Thelma's voice rose three octaves. "No, no, no, David, you got it all wrong," Lisa said hastily, her face turning red. "It's my fault. I explained everything incorrectly."
"David, we don't want to get rid of you," Thelma said, rushing to hug me. "I love you with all my heart. I'll be crushed if you leave."
"David, I feel the same," Lisa had tears running down her cheeks.
"Well, then I have no idea what you two are talking about," I said desperately. "I need a drink." I didn't care that it wasn't on the menu.
"I think we should all have a drink," Lisa said, taking my hand. "When we calm down again, I will try to better explain what we want to do. But David, I want you to understand that we will respect your decision, whatever it is."
"Okay, Lisa," I said, finishing my first shot of whiskey. "First, explain to me about the child. Are you sure you want a child? This is a radical change for you." Of all the things these women discussed before our arrangement, having another child was not one of them. But after Thelma and I started having fun with our kids, it must have started Lisa's biological clock. After some time, the desire to have my own child became irresistible.
This new development required changes to the agreement so that Lisa could have me more often, especially when she thought she might be fertile. It took 4 months, but eventually, Lisa became pregnant and gave birth to a beautiful baby girl, Charlotte. She has her mother's eyes and my smile. Thelma and the kids adore her.
As for the supposed divorce, it was another chapter in my crazy married life. When Lisa talked about not wanting to be married to me, it was just another part of the madness in our ever-changing agreement. More precisely, Lisa didn't talk about us getting divorced right away, but she didn't talk about us staying married either.
In one of their many conversations, Thelma said she was worried that her children would face the stigma of having children out of wedlock. Lisa agreed with her and offered a solution. Remember, Lisa has a lot of money, and money can buy almost anything. According to the new agreement, I had to divorce Lisa after the birth of our child. Then I was supposed to marry Thelma, but Lisa was going to change the documents to show that Thelma and I were married at the time our children were born. Then Thelma and I would divorce, and I would remarry Lisa.
If you're confused, think about how I feel. Shortly after Charlotte was born, I signed divorce papers and married Thelma. I don't know how Lisa did it, but she had a marriage license, and the records were changed to reflect my intended marriage to Thelma. I asked Lisa why she didn't just change the records without the marriage ceremony. They told me that this was a woman's business, and I fell silent.
The only downside to Lisa having a baby was that Lisa's parents now wanted to visit more often to see their grandson. It added some spice to our lives, and I was sure Lisa's parents didn't buy Lisa's story about having an administrative assistant always on hand. Besides, I caught their glances when they didn't think I would notice them.
You're probably wondering what the kids thought of this blended family. Apparently, they didn't think anything of it when they were little, but as they got older, they were told that their mothers were very good friends and that at different times I had been married to each of them. They left the rest rather vague. When the children grow up, I have no doubt that they will understand that our family is not entirely ordinary.
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