Transcription
Are you saying that you have a collection of skin luggage?
>> Of course I'm not. D, don't be ridiculous. Think of the smell. You haven't thought of the smell, you.
>> Dialogue. Outside of the plot, it's arguably the most important part of any story. But it's really freaking hard to do. Yet, we all know good dialogue when we hear it.
>> COLIN, would you shut the [ __ ] up?
>> How would you like to die today, [ __ ]? No.
>> And we all know bad dialogue. Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends dimensions of time and space.
>> But what truly makes the difference? Well, my hope is to answer that today with the internet's [music] favorite obsession, the levels tier list. We are going to be ranking the seven levels of dialogue and pinning down exactly what each one entails. And if you're asking yourself, why should I be listening to this guy? Well, that's a fair question. My answer is that I have written over a 100,000 words worth of dialogue across my five books. I have coached published authors on their dialogue and I have spent the last 8 years as a professional novel and script editor.
>> I feel like I'm definitely getting more than my money's worth.
>> Yeah, I feel like we got through a lot of good stuff today.
>> I think we did. Uh Alex, I really appreciate uh I have appreciated and do appreciate your time and your insights. They were more than what I could have hoped for. So, thank you. And if you like what you hear, you can check out my services and my books on my website, savagebooks.net. I'll leave a link below. But needless to say, I have spent way too much time around dialogue. It's literally my job. But I still love yapping about it. So, let's get into it.
>> I did not hit her. It's not true. It's [ __ ] I did not hit her. I did not. Oh, hi Mark.
>> The first thing to understand about dialogue, especially for this video, is that its level of execution is not stagnant within a fiction. It's variable. Some moments are better than others. It's [snorts] how you can get banger lines like this.
>> Poor Peter. Too weak to send me home to die. No, I just want to kill you myself. Ada boy.
>> In the same fictions as this.
>> So get on your phones, scour the internet, and Scooby-Doo this. So, the clips we use aren't a commentary on the whole fiction they are a part of, but showcases of what I consider to be examples of a particular level of dialogue. And that is where things get weird with level one, because dialogue itself is weird. Dialogue in its most basic form is obviously meant to convey people talking back and forth to each other realistically. So, obviously, bad dialogue would be when that back and forth is unrealistic. Duh. Except sometimes dialogue is so [music] bad that it aura borrows his back around into being good. And that's because it's so freaking entertaining. YOU'RE JUST A SLAVE. Pitiful humans or segregation hatred. IS THAT WHAT YOU'VE done with your free will, boy? Don't you lecture me with your $30 haircut. Goku dies.
>> Level one dialogue and level seven dialogue actually have a ton in common. But as far as level one being so bad that it's good, that's because you can't believe how far from the norm it is. It's like the people writing it had never heard a human used language before. [laughter] God damn, Cheryl, that coffee tastes like [ __ ] What' you do? Take a dump in it?
>> As a matter of fact, I sure did. I want a [ __ ] divorce. All right, Dan.
>> We legit keep engaging with the fiction because we want to see just how far the rabbit hole goes. It's like you were in some weird haze or dream that just seems close enough to human language to be real, but is still so wrong.
>> I can't believe you committed suicide. I cannot believe you committed suicide. How could you have done this? How could you have committed suicide? This level is so far removed from skillful execution that it's hard to even objectively define its parameters. It's like if someone went to the Great British Baking Show and gave the judges a urinal cake. It's like technically what they asked for, but it's so far beyond the pale of reason that now they're just interested in unpacking the labyrinth of your mind to see how you got to that point. And of course, the individual actor's choice plays a huge part in the dialogue. Guadama be real. No amount of acting could rescue these reactor explosion level lines.
>> They're eating her and then they're going to eat me.
>> Oh my god.
>> Fictions like these inspire whole rabbid cult followings and unironic studies about how they were made. They are postmodern and nearly impossible to crack open from an objective critical lens. This type of dialogue cannot be purposefully constructed. They can only be half-hazardly fallen into and appreciated because of their ridiculousness. Very few fictions can maintain this level of dialogue consistently. In fact, there are some lines of dialogue that become great simply by being surrounded by terrible writing. It's as if all the collective brain power of the writing staff was used on one line.
>> Do you think God stays in heaven because he too lives in fear of what he's created?
>> These lines become so famous that they nearly take on a life of their own outside the fiction.
>> You don't remember?
>> For you, the day Bison graced your village was the most important day of your life. But for me, it was Tuesday.
>> Level one dialogue is [music] narrative junk food and I would argue a necessary aspect of our storytelling ecosystem. It has a charm and accidental wit that you just can't help but love. Qualities that aren't quite replicated in the next tier.
>> It's turkey time.
>> Huh? Gobble gobble.
>> What?
>> Level two is a bit easier to categorize because it's just terrible and not in like a fun way. Dialogue in this level can be bad for a multitude of reasons. For the vast majority of cases though, the dialogue just doesn't make any sense. When he is near, everything goes wrong. Toast falls jellyside down, children hit tables, and people get hurt.
>> And I mean, doesn't even make sense in universe.
>> This is Katana. She's got my back. I would advise not getting killed by her. Her sword traps the souls of its victims. Okay, I still laugh at this line because the idea of telling people they should avoid death because the death will be bad is maybe one of the dumbest things I've ever heard. And this is almost so bad it's good. I I struggle to keep this not in in tier one, but in other cases, you could tell the writers were trying to cook up something iconic and unique, but then just completely missed the mark on it.
>> Search the property. What do you mean search the property? You don't have a warrant. My face is my worm.
>> There is some dialogue where the line itself isn't necessarily terrible, but it's the fact that it just doesn't fit in with the rest of the fiction.
>> You aren't a good girl, but you need a bad [ __ ]
>> The literal term for this is anacronistic dialogue, but you can just call it terrible. Or dialogue can be fine, but then become terrible because it has literally nothing to do with the plot, making it useless or just kind of weird.
>> This is illegal. She's a minor. We're protected by the Romeo and Juliet laws.
>> We dated for a little while. I was a sophomore and he was a senior. It's fine.
>> We've got a pre-existing juvenile foundational relationship.
>> All in all, terrible dialogue is predicated mainly on just a straightup missing of the mark. It's hollow. It doesn't actually provide any real details or context or info on the story. It's empty calories that seem to exist to kind of just make the scenes stick together. It's as if the dialogue was written based off an outline. It's made by people who don't really seem to care about telling the story at all. They seem to want to create a moment, and it's almost as if they're writing the dialogue without knowing much about the fiction itself. Don't be one of these people.
>> I don't like sand. It's coarse and rough and irritating, and it gets everywhere.
>> Level three dialogue is just bad. It's not offensive or jarring. It's just kind of lazy. See, level three dialogue is the first level where writers at least attempt to use some narrative techniques to elevate the dialogue. They are going to start using buildup and payoff, humor to undercut tension, subversive oneliners, and cheeky callbacks. The problem becomes that all these techniques are merely tools to create good dialogue. Level three writers think that simply using the tools makes the dialogue good in and of itself. It's like trying to build a house out of hammers and saws. And this is how you get dialogue that serves no purpose and seems to almost mock human interaction. There's no substance. It's all just cliches and gimmicks.
>> Thing about street fights.
>> The street always wins.
>> Level three dialogue just barely conveys a meaning. and you get what's supposed to be happening and what's supposed to be communicated between the characters, but it's just so trit that you feel like you're just watching a summary of a much deeper conversation.
>> It's time we show [music] the Fire Nation that we believe in our beliefs as much as they believe in theirs.
>> And for the oneliners, it's like the writers understand comedy from the outside, but don't really have any interest in investigating it deeply. I mean, take a look at this actually funny line from Batman 1966. Number two,
>> What weighs 60 sits in a tree and is very dangerous. A sparrow with a machine gun.
>> Yes, of course.
>> It's It's so freaking funny and it's ridiculous and it knows it's ridiculous. And that's the point because the movie itself is ridiculous. But then a writer will see that, not understand why it works, and then want to do it in their fiction, which gives us this.
>> Do you know what happens to a toad when it's struck by lightning? The same thing that happens to everything else.
>> [screaming]
>> Dialogue at this level is cosplaying and being witty by using the most basic and easily accessible techniques without actually going deep into the characters or the story.
>> Good news, bad news.
>> You know, I like my dessert first.
>> Can't move without leaving sign.
>> Give me the damn veggies.
>> This level of dialogue is also where you're going to get characters doing huge info dumps of exposition that you just don't care about. don't recognize the Council of the Kings. In
>> Adelaine's time when the seven kingdoms were one, our ancestors gathered here.
>> Lant sat here at the head of the table.
>> Bad writing is everywhere in Hollywood and beyond. It's almost like a right of passage that a writer must endure to find his voice and style. And once you do, you upgrade to level four dialogue.
>> I can't believe you bought them. They're only a dollar a dozen. I know, but I just think it's a bad idea to buy clams from a guy on the street corner.
>> Level four is probably the most boring of all the levels. And honestly, I'm not going to spend too much time on it because I don't know. It's just like all right. Like, it's fine. It's not great. It's not bad. It's like CW dialogue or like Nick at Night dialogue. I guess the best way to describe it is just maybe Marvel dialogue.
>> I recognize the council has made a decision, but given that it's a stupid ass decision, I've elected to ignore it.
>> Dialogue at level four uses asinance, alliteration, simile, metaphor, and does it well enough to give us insight into the characters and the conflicts that they are involved in. If I were assessing a client's work, I would call this type of dialogue utilitarian. It gets the job done, and it isn't distracting, but it's not going to wow you. Though, I guess to be fair to Marvel, there are moments where level four dialogue can briefly ascend to be truly inspired and affect the cultural zeitgeist.
>> Perfectly balanced, as all things should be. I am Iron Man.
>> But what is grief if not love? Persevering. Again though, there's just not much to give commentary on. And the difference between level four's all right dialogue and the really good stuff will become more apparent as we continue.
>> Then we'll need to realign the public's perception of Amy. make them stop seeing her as America's sweetheart and see her for what she is, which is a mind [ __ ] of the first degree.
>> Here is where we start getting to the good stuff. Level five dialogue keeps your attention pretty much from start to finish and is able to evoke exactly what it wants from you. The dialogue isn't just some series of generic oneliners that could be placed in any other fiction. This dialogue is character defined and completely unique.
>> I'll tell you that ball chick was right about one thing. You will never save the world. [music] You couldn't even save a relationship with a goddamn stripper. And [ __ ] I wish I could say you die alone, but it's one of GOD'S BEST JOKES THAT YOU CAN'T DIE. EXCEPT IT'S ON ALL OF US.
>> One of the things to realize at this level is that good dialogue is inseparable from good character. Truly good dialogue works synergistically with deep and complex characters to reveal them.
>> No, I want to hire the Sopranos to beat the [ __ ] out of him with a hammer. We don't even have to do that. That's right. We can do that ourselves. I'm 6'5 220 and there's two of me.
>> It is the exploration of their identity through their chosen language that makes Level 5 dialogue unique. It no longer is about just what the character is saying. It's more of how they're choosing to say it.
>> However, that blue represents millions of dollars and countless jobs. And it's sort of comical how you think that you've made a choice that exempts you from the fashion industry when in fact you're wearing a sweater that was selected for you by the people in this room from a pile of stuff.
>> This level, like the previous one, still relies on narrative techniques like simile, metaphor, oneliners, and punchlines, but now they aren't just empty cliches stamped on a page. The witty quips are pulled up from the character's [music] soul, and that turns them from cliche into unique. Gaffne, we had our own brand of diplomacy. Shake with your right hand, but hold a rock in your left. One thing to note, too, is that at these higher levels, we have moved past dialogue just being realistic. Lower level dialogue is predicated on making language sound like actual humans are having a back and forth. But level five and higher dialogue isn't concerned with realism anymore. It's concerned with believability [music] and entertainment.
>> Is this fun for you to really rub in? Not fun.
>> You win. You scored all the points in the argument according to facts. You are right and I am wrong like always. But you know what? I don't care because I'm trying to move forward.
>> You haven't changed at all.
>> Is what the characters are saying consistent with their personalities. And do I like hearing it? If yes and yes, then it doesn't matter if two people wouldn't actually talk like this. It matters that I want them to.
>> You've been called the Da Vinci of our time. What do you say to that?
>> Absolutely ridiculous. I don't paint. And what do you say to your other nickname, the merchant of death?
>> That's not bad.
>> Good dialogue at level 5 is really the baseline that many of us expect and want out of a fiction. It is dialogue that gives you the keys to entering the cultural conversation as a writer. But to actually get in the club, you might still need to go higher.
>> Does Harvey know about you and his little bully?
>> Where are they?
>> Killing is making a choice.
>> Where are they? choose between one life or the other. Your friendly district attorney or his blushing bride debate.
>> Level six is where dialogue starts to become amazing and so good that it begins to transcend objective criticism. At a certain point, dialogue just works. It feels right. But I'll do my best to explain why anyway. Level six dialogue is all about capitalizing on drama. I did NOT KILL JOFFREY, BUT I WISH THAT I had. Watching your vicious bastard die gave me more relief than a thousand lying [ __ ]
>> This may seem like a weird distinction to focus on, but the scenes of heightened drama are effectively the whole reason we engage with fiction in the first place. They are the climactic moments. They are when the characters are facing their greatest struggles. And therefore, dialogue works symbiotically with drama. The greater the dramatic moment, the better the dialogue can be. And the better the dialogue is, the more drama can be evoked from the moment. And let's try you. I'm the vampire Ar. My daddy vampire grew me into a little [ __ ]
>> My brother made me pretend I didn't for 240 years.
>> My daughter was my sister was my throw pillow. When he wouldn't look at me kindly.
>> This becomes most evident when looking at climactic scenes done wrong where the dialogue does not meet the demand of the drama.
>> I'll crush this. Do you hear me? You bring JUNE BACK, I'LL CRUSH THIS.
>> GO AHEAD. You don't have the balls. What?
>> It's the same idea that the best player on the team has to play his best game during the biggest moment. And so too does level six dialogue come in to capitalize and validate [music] the mounted drama. You are not worthy of my respect. You are not a god. You are simply bad product.
>> But drama is really only one part of it. Level six writing has many different styles of execution. And there are three that in my experience are the most prevalent. The first section is what I call elevated dialogue. This is the poetic lyrical appeal to emotions.
>> You can't have it both ways. You want an equal partner when it suits you. You want a man to take charge when it suits you? And I'm supposed to what? Just divine when you want which?
>> The rhythm is nearly Shakespearean. There's a beat and a meter to it. The words and the sentiments beneath them become magnified and arandized. It's not just the situation that's dramatized. It's the language itself.
>> Why you ask that? You who killed your mother to come into the world. You are an ill-made, spiteful little creature full of envy, lust, and low cunning.
>> And then we have the second style, naturalistic dialogue. This is dialogue that moves past the conventions of writing and displays people exactly as they would talk in real life.
>> What does Marcelus Wallace look like?
>> WHAT? WHAT COUNTRY are you from?
>> WHAT? WHAT?
>> WHAT? AIN'T NO COUNTRY I EVER HEARD OF. THEY SPEAK ENGLISH IN WHAT? WHAT?
>> ENGLISH, [ __ ] DO YOU SPEAK IT?
>> YES.
>> It's choppy. It's messy. And it's really hard to do because it requires a complete mastery of interpersonal communication. It's manufactured genuiness. It's real as fake can be. It's paradoxical and intoxicating.
>> YOU'RE SUCH A DICK.
>> EVERY DAY I WAKE UP AND I HOPE YOU'RE DEAD. DEAD LIKE IF I CAN GUARANTEE HENRY WOULD BE OKAY. I'D HOPE YOU get an illness. IF THEY GET HIT BY A CAR AND DIE.
>> AND THIRD, WE have the jousting dialogue. This is characters in oratory battle. Back and forth, back and forth.
>> You're going to blame me because you were the business head of the company and you made a bad business deal with your own company.
>> This is going to be like I'm not a part of Facebook. It
>> won't be like you're not a [music] part of Facebook. You're not a part of Facebook.
>> My name's on the mast head.
>> You might want to check again.
>> It's because I froze the account.
>> You think we were going to let you parade around in your ridiculous suits, pretending you were running THIS COMPANY?
>> SORRY. MY PROD IS AT THE CLEANERS ALONG WITH MY HOODIE AND MY [ __ ] YOU FLIP-FLOPS. YOU pretentious douchebag.
>> It's verbal speed chess. It's the dirty dialoguebased baby of a driveby in a wrestling match.
>> We could be clones controlled by robots controlled with special headsets that the real Rick and Morty are wearing while they're [ __ ] your mother.
>> I'm going to kill you.
>> COME TO 312 OLIVE STREET.
>> IS THAT HER ADDRESS?
>> YOU DON'T KNOW BECAUSE YOU'RE A BAD SON.
>> Level six dialogue is the prototypical notion that comes to mind when we think of excellent dialogue. It's the greatest moments of the narrative that we love synthesized down to their most dramatic parts. And that then leads us to the most extraordinary writing of them all. Level seven.
>> People come to us because we don't sell them on anything. No packet of [ __ ] bleeding heart United Nations Volvo gender vendor horseshit.
>> Level seven dialogue stands above the rest because it indulges in uses of language that you have never heard before. So much of the reason that we engage with fiction is that we wish to be told interesting stories in interesting ways. Novelty is at a premium. Everything has been done before. So when we find something that we have never engaged with before, it's impossible for us to look away. Where were you when Paul was suckling at his mother's tea day? Where were you? Who was nursing you? Poor Eli. One of Band's Sounds. That land has been had. Nothing you can do about is gone. at if you would just take this le Danielage. [clears throat]
>> It's the inverse of everything we've talked about so far. It's not realistic. It's not even believable. And it's cracking open the carropus of characters that we can't possibly begin to understand.
>> If you deliberately sabotage my band, I will [ __ ] you like a pig. Now, are you a rusher or are you a dragger or are you GOING TO BE ON MY [ __ ] [screaming] TIME? BUT IT'S THE very alien nature of it all that allures us. It's like some Eldrich elders are imparting to us a type of coded mana that allows you just a glimpse of strange people involved in strange customs by which we can learn to better ourselves from. It's not meant to be deeply understood. It's meant to be felt and experienced. Headline is it's a body pit. They have a massive data with no analytics. There's no way of telling what's a hand and what's a foot.
>> I don't know exactly what they're doing, but they're fakes. [ __ ] beehives, almond milk, and [music] take another week on that report, Matilda. And it's not a body pit. Whatever the [ __ ] a body pit is. It's a [ __ ] mui pit.
>> That's junky.
>> Level seven dialogue ascends to contradict its very existence. The language is postverbal. The words don't have to mean anything.
>> You are pukes. You are the lowest form of life on Earth. You are not even human [ __ ] beings. You are nothing but unorganized, grabbastic pieces of amphibian [ __ ]
>> They are meant to convey an emotion and feeling the same way a jump scare or an astrological vista might. It's nonverbal verbal communication, merely hinting at the silhouette of language so that you allow yourself to fill in the blanks.
>> Think of that. You're dealing with numbers all day long. decimal points, high frequencies, [music] bang, bang, bang, [ __ ] digits, all very acidic, above the shoulders, mustard [ __ ]
>> Level seven dialogue taps into some type of holistic interpretive space in storytelling.
>> Salute. Yes. With cleavers through his blood starved flesh. How it crawls with failure like flies on lick wet kerrion. It effectively stops trying to appeal to your logic and starts grasping full power at your soul.
>> And those, my friends, are the seven levels of dialogue. [music] Of course, pointing out the differences in the execution doesn't make them any easier to achieve for yourself. If you feel like you might need some help, check out my website for coaching services or full editing consultations. And make sure to check out my five fantasy books available on my website to see how I do dialogue. As always, it was a pleasure and I will talk to you all again.