Transcription
Your life doesn't feel off because you're missing something. It feels off because there are things draining you every single day and you have gotten used to it. That was me. High functioning, doing all the things, hitting my deadlines, showing up for everyone. On the outside, it looked like I had it together. But inside, I was tired, distracted, flat.
So, I did something radical. I didn't add anything. I didn't optimize or buy a new planner or download another app. I started cutting, deleting, and within days, everything shifted. I'll be honest, at first it felt weird. I'm a doctor by training. I have spent years in environments where the solution was always to add more. More medication, more supplements, more hacks. So, the idea that less could actually be the fix, that was uncomfortable for me, but it worked.
Today, I want to share the five surprising things that I cut out and how each one instantly gave me more energy, clarity, and momentum. These aren't your usual stop drinking soda types of tips. Some of them are sneaky. Some of them hurt a little at first, but all of them made my life instantly better. And I'll say this upfront, once you start cutting these drains, you'll start noticing them everywhere. It's like decluttering your closet. Suddenly, you're sideeying every sweater that you have been carrying around since 2015. Except in this case, it's your energy. So, let's get into it.
I used to have something playing all the time. Podcast in the car, YouTube videos while I cooked, Netflix in the background while I answered emails, even falling asleep to just one more episode. And I told myself that this was efficient. I'm learning while I chop onions or I'm winding down with some background noise. Totally harmless. Except it wasn't harmless because when I finally stopped, I realized I hadn't actually been alone with my own thoughts in years. I'd outsourced every quiet moment of my life to other people's voices.
Here's the thing. Our brains need quiet. Neuroscientists have studied something called the default mode network. That's the part of your brain that lights up when you're not actively doing anything. When you're daydreaming, you're staring out the window or just sitting in silence. And guess what? That is when your brain makes connections and processes emotions and consolidates memories. It's literally the space where creativity and self-awareness live. But if you constantly flood your brain with input, the default mode network never kicks in. You stay in consumption mode, not creation mode.
When I cut the background noise, I thought it would feel boring. At first, it actually felt itchy, like I couldn't just be with myself, which was kind of confronting. But then something amazing happened. I started having actual ideas again. I solved problems in the shower. I felt calmer. I even noticed silly little things like the sound of my own knife chopping vegetables, which sounds small, but it made me feel present in my life again. So, thing number one was cutting the background noise. And this wasn't just about peace and quiet. It was about reclaiming some mental space that I didn't realize that I had been giving away.
And once I felt that shift, it made me start questioning other things that I had been letting hijack my attention, like the very first thing that I looked at every single morning. For years, my mornings started with headlines. I'd roll over, grab my phone, and immediately get hit with breaking news. Earthquakes, political scandals, economic crashes, and of course, celebrity divorces because apparently my brain needed that at 6:30 in the morning. And the worst part, I thought I was being responsible. Like, I'm an informed adult. I need to know what's happening in the world. But what I was actually doing was serving myself a buffet of stress before I'd even had coffee.
There's a reason for this. Psychologists talk about something called negativity bias. And maybe you've heard about this. Our brains are hardwired to latch on to bad news more than good news. It was a survival mechanism back in the caveman days. And news outlets know this. That's why their headlines are always framed in the most alarming way possible because fear and outrage keep you clicking. One study from the American Psychological Association found that heavy news consumers actually report higher stress levels and more sleep problems and more difficulty concentrating. All because of what they are feeding their brains first thing in the morning.
So when I cut morning news, I expected to feel irresponsible, like what if I missed something important? But here's what actually happened. Nothing blew up. The world kept turning and I started my mornings with my own thoughts, not CNN's. Now I give myself at least the first hour of the day without news, sometimes much longer. I still stay informed. I just do it later when my mind is already grounded. And the difference is night and day. And honestly, the things that I used to panic over at 6:30 a.m., by 11:00 a.m., they're either resolved or already forgotten by everyone. So, basically, I was giving away my peace of mind for things that didn't even matter by lunchtime. So, if you want to start your day with clarity and calm, try cutting the morning news. That's thing number two to cut. Protect those first minutes of your day like they're sacred.
Now, once I did that, it opened my eyes to another sneaky habit. But before we get there, let me just quickly share something that might help if you're craving a fresh start. Because if this is resonating with you, I want to invite you to join me for something that I created called the reset. It's a free 5-day challenge designed to help you to reset your energy and focus and mindset. Each day you'll get a short email, a printable tracker, and some of my favorite tools that I usually reserved for my paid students. It's simple, it's doable, and honestly, it's like a mini intervention for your life. If you've been feeling drained, stuck, or just overdue for a reset, this is your chance. Go ahead and get started by just clicking the link in the description.
Okay, let's talk about the next thing that I cut. This one looked like it was about being organized, but really it was about fear, and it was draining me in ways that I didn't even realize. I used to be the queen of just in case. If I went to a meeting, I would bring three pens, two notebooks, and a highlighter, just in case. Traveling, I would pack five outfits for a two-day trip because what if there was a freak snowstorm or a surprise black tie dinner? It made me feel prepared. But what it really made me was exhausted because just in case wasn't about being organized. It was about fear. Fear that something would go wrong and I wouldn't be able to handle it.
Psychologists call this intolerance of uncertainty and it's strongly linked to anxiety. The more that we try to eliminate every possible risk, the more cluttered and stressed we actually become. There's also research showing that physical clutter increases cortisol levels. That's your body's stress hormone. So all that extra stuff, all those backup plans, they don't just take up space in your bag. They take up space in your brain.
When I cut just in case, thinking it was uncomfortable at first, like leaving the house with one pen instead of three felt reckless. But here's what happened. Nothing catastrophic. And actually the opposite. I felt lighter. I had more energy. I trusted myself more because I wasn't outsourcing my confidence to an extra sweater or backup charger. I started believing that I could handle things as they came. And let's be honest, the apocalypse has never once arrived because I only packed one pair of dress shoes. The worst that's happened is I wore the same pair twice and guess what? Nobody noticed. So thing number three is cutting just in case thinking. And to be clear, just in case wasn't about minimalism for the sake of it. It was about shifting out of fear and into trust. And that freed up so much mental space.
But there was still one drain that wasn't about clutter or stuff at all. It was in my own head. And cutting this next one, it changed everything about how I moved through the world. My inner critic used to have a lot of airtime. Anytime I was about to try something new, launch a video, speak on stage, try a new sport, the voice would start. Who do you think you are? You're going to mess this up. Everyone else has it figured out but you. And because it was my own voice, I believed it. I thought, well, this must be the truth. But really, it was just a bad loop that I had gotten used to running.
There's solid research showing that the way that we talk to ourselves directly impacts performance and resilience. Psychologists talk about self-perception theory, the idea that we learn who we are by watching what we do, and that includes how we talk to ourselves. And studies have found that athletes who practiced positive self-t talk actually perform better under pressure. In contrast, people stuck in negative loops are more likely to quit even when their actual ability is the same. Here's another fascinating study. When people frame identity positively, saying, "I'm a non-smoker," instead of, "I'm trying to quit smoking," they're significantly more likely to succeed. That's identitybased language. And your selft talk is basically identity practice.
So when I cut negative selft talk, it wasn't about pretending that everything was perfect. It was about catching that inner critic and asking, "Would I ever talk to a friend this way?" Now, when I notice the old scripts, "You're terrible at this," I'll reframe it. I'll say, "This is what learning looks like. Growth feels awkward. That doesn't mean that I'm failing." And it sounds small, but the difference in momentum has been massive. I spend less time doubting myself and more time actually doing the thing because honestly my inner critic was basically a mean girl with a microphone. Cutting her airtime. Best decision I ever made. She's still in there, but now she only gets like the 2 a.m. slot on a community radio station, not prime time. Cutting negative selft talk was thing number four that I removed from my life. And doing this wasn't just about being nicer to myself. It was about shifting my identity from someone who tears herself down to someone who backs herself up.
And once I made that shift, I realized that there was one last drain that I needed to address. Something so subtle I barely noticed it. But it was stealing more energy than I realized. Here's a sneaky one. I used to fill every micro gap in my day. Waiting for the kettle to boil, check email, standing in line at the store, scroll Instagram. Even waiting for a Zoom meeting to start, I would cram in one more task. And on the surface, it felt productive. Like, look at me maximizing every second. But really, I was training my brain to hate stillness, to feel restless the second there wasn't stimulation.
I mentioned the default mode network a few minutes ago. It's the part of your brain that activates when you're not focused on a task. And as I said, it's crucial for self-reflection, problem solving, and even building your sense of identity. But when you fill every gap with scrolling or planning, the default mode network never switches on. You lose those sparks of creativity and that deeper processing that your brain needs.
When I cut the habit of filling gaps, it felt uncomfortable at first. I would stand in line without pulling out my phone and feel exposed. Like, what am I supposed to do? Just stare at the wall? But here's the wild part. Once I got used to it, those little pauses became my favorite part of the day. I would notice my breathing. I'd remember something that I was grateful for. Sometimes a creative idea would just pop in, like my brain finally had a chance to catch up with itself. Now I'm officially that person who just stares out the window while the kettle boils. And honestly, it feels kind of rebellious, like everyone else is frantically swiping and I'm over here vibing with my teaag. So thing number five is to cut filling gaps. And for me, cutting the habit of filling gaps didn't just free up time, it gave me back presence. And it reminded me that doing nothing, even for 30 seconds, is not wasted. It's where some of the best stuff happens.
So, let's quickly recap. Here are the five things that I cut that instantly changed my life. One, constant background noise. Two, morning news. Three, just in case, thinking. Four, negative selft talk and five filling every gap. Each of these things was draining me quietly every day. And once I deleted them, I had more energy, more clarity, and honestly, more peace. And that's the real takeaway here. Your life doesn't always change because of what you add. It often changes when you cut. We live in a world obsessed with adding. more hacks, more habits, more productivity tools. But sometimes the fastest way to feel better is to delete what has been quietly stealing from you.
So, I'd love to hear from you. Which one of these do you need to cut first? Or maybe you've already cut something from your life that made a huge difference. Go ahead and drop it in the comments. I always love reading what you share. And if this video resonated with you, you will definitely want to check out my video on eight habits that quickly changed my life. That one is all about the flip side, the small things that you can add that actually create momentum. I will link it on the next screen coming up and then I'll see you there.
Apparently, my brain needed that at 6:30 in the morning. Of course, the phone's ringing now. We'll just ignore that. Growth feels awkward. That doesn't ah the phone again. Maybe it's important. Not likely. Okay, that's a wrap.