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They're egocentric, they're demanding, and it's always about them. No, we're not talking about Andrew Tate. We're talking about narcissists, but even worse, a sexual narcissist.
Sexual narcissism is defined as a self-centered pattern of sexual behavior. From manipulation to shaming. This type of narcissism is toxic and dangerous for anyone who encounters it. The purpose of this information is to identify the harmful and toxic behaviors of a sexual narcissist and to recognize if you might be a victim of their abuse. Now, let's begin.
Number one, what about my feelings? If your sex life was a movie, then the sexual narcissist believes that they're the main character. With the sexual narcissist, your feelings, thoughts, and opinions about sex don't really matter. It's only ever about what they want. Since they view you as merely an empty vessel for their sexual desires and fantasies, for example, before or even during sex, you may try to take the lead and disclose to your sexual partner some of the things you'd like to try. A sexual narcissist will not only disregard your request, but they'll belittle you for even attempting to voice your opinions or desires. For the sexual narcissist, sex is not a shared experience of two bodies and minds. It's an opportunity for them to elevate their ego and exercise superiority. Not only that, they may even use humiliation as an abusive tactic to attempt to lower your self-esteem because the more vulnerable you are, the more they can prey on your insecurities.
Number two, manipulation. This sign is one of the most harmful and toxic behaviors to look out for. Sexual narcissists often employ tactics of manipulation to get their needs met in the bedroom. This includes violating boundaries, guilt-tripping, and lying. If you don't agree to satisfy their every whim, they can even resort to disregarding consent and can use persuasive tactics to weigh you down until you say yes to having sex with them. For example, if you are not in the mood one day and you decline the narcissist's request to have sex, they may try to convince you by using guilt. "Well, if you really care about or love me, you'd want to have sex with me." Or even worse, they may prey upon your emotions and feelings for them by threatening to break up with you or stop seeing you if you don't engage in sexual activity. Never allow another person to coerce you into sex. If you don't feel comfortable and they still insist on having sex, it's better to cut ties with them altogether.
Number three, aggression. Standing up to a sexual narcissist can trigger them to rage at you, and it can get dangerous and violent real quick if you're not careful. This behavior is in entitlement because the sexual narcissist believes they deserve to get their every desire fulfilled and that you have to follow suit without question. And yes, this includes having sex too. When you don't do exactly as they say in the bedroom, they might start to criticize or devalue you. They may start to pick apart your physical appearance and even mock you. When you try to draw healthy boundaries, which can be traumatizing and triggering, the sexual narcissist's audacity is usually very brazen. They'll act like you owe them something, especially if they've taken you out for dinner or just bought you lavish gifts. Does this sound familiar?
Number four, craving validation. Humility is clearly not the sexual narcissist's greatest strength. You'll notice that being with them is emotionally draining because you have to constantly reassure them and boost their ego so that they can keep their delusional sense of self-importance intact. This also translates to the bedroom. Even when the sexual narcissist is trying to please you at first, they're only doing it so that you let your guard down and trust them. They do this so that you view them favorably because despite their best efforts to hide insecurities, they care deeply about how others perceive them, which includes their performance in bed. If you don't shower them with praise and adoration, you may see a very ugly side of them, and they may even rage against you.
Number five, infidelity. The sexual narcissist usually resorts to infidelity because they're craving more attention and validation, and one sexual partner isn't enough. This also comes right before they plan on discarding you, which is something narcissists tend to do to others in general, but it's also common for them to discard their sexual partners when they feel they've served their purpose and no longer view them as useful or valuable. It's cruel and inconsiderate, but this is why narcissists are known for lacking empathy, and sexual narcissists are no exception. You won't be the first and certainly not the last. It's better to realize as soon as possible that the sexual narcissist is preoccupied with their own needs and desires, so discarding you comes easy for them.
Remember, someone does not need to be diagnosed with narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) to be a sexual narcissist, and although both possess similar traits, they're not the same, and one requires a diagnosis.
Have you ever dealt with a sexual narcissist? What was your experience? Let us know in the comments. If you like this video, be sure to check out "What Is Sexual Narcissism?" linked in the description. As always, have an amazing day.