Transcription
There's this moment right before the door swings open where time itself seems to stand still. There's a slight hum of something mechanical carrying you to unforeseen lands. In that space lie two versions of yourself. One that clings on to the past, held back by fear and comfort. The other reaches towards something more. A life worth pursuing. A future worth stepping into.
I like to call this space the waiting room. A room where people wait for a green light. Wait to feel ready. Wait for things to line up perfectly. Or wait for someone else to make the choice for them. And it's also the place where countless stories begin. Many great stories in some way include some sort of waiting room concept. It's a moment in the story where a character must choose whether or not they want to change or take that next step into their journey. Miles Morales, Leap of Faith. Arthur Morgan deciding what kind of man he wants to be. Will from Good Will Hunting turning down opportunities because of the fear of leaving behind the life he's always known. Everyone has their own reasons for staying. But no matter the story, every road eventually leads to the same question. When is it the right time to act?
It's a question people have been asking for thousands of years. In ancient Greece, there's this concept known as Kairos. A concept that translates to the exact or critical time. The Greeks believed there were two kinds of times, or gods, you could say. The first was Chronos, the ticking clock, the passing of days, the endless accumulation of years. And then there's Kairos, the moment that mattered, the opening, the opportunity, the brief crack in time where change becomes possible. It's a moment that cannot be scheduled, be predicted, or waited on forever. It's a singular instant where everything aligns. And when that exact moment happens, you must ask yourself, "Are you ready?"
So, a lot of people in general are afraid of failure. How did you become one of those people who doesn't seem to be afraid of failing?
"Failure, it doesn't exist. It's not existent."
What the hell does that mean? Seriously, what does failure mean? It's not. It doesn't. It doesn't exist. It's a figment of your imagination.
"What does it mean?"
Pulling the Jedi mind trick on me right now.
"No, I'm serious. Look, I I'm trying to think like how can I explain it? So, you want to..."
I became obsessed. I became obsessed. To get to the level that you need to to get to the pinnacle, it needs to be no outsiders. It needs to be you need to have your team and and your focus and that's it. I don't need friends that aren't involved in this game.
There comes a [ __ ] day where push comes to shove, where being mediocre, being like average, and [ __ ] just [ __ ] burns. It sucks so much. And my personal question to you is, why not you? If I see the opportunity, I'm going to go for it. You know what I'm saying? We're all going to die. When it's true, live like that. Live like you could die tomorrow. Go for it.
"No one thinks you're crazy. You're not yet operating to the outer limits of your potential. You're not there yet because somebody in your life should say, 'Man, you really care about this in like a crazy way.'"
There are many reasons why someone chooses to wait or delay doing something they know must eventually be done. A lot of stories we can relate to our own lives from people we know. A friend staying in a job for too long, avoiding a difficult conversation, choosing a career path, or waiting years to pursue a dream. Humans are naturally resistant to change. We're creatures who enjoy comfort. Having a sense of control and one might even call it security. Even if we know our current circumstances are hindering us from achieving the goals we set out.
Every pop icon, sports legend, or notable name, at some point in their career took a leap of faith and bet everything on themselves. Denzel Washington, for example, throughout his career emphasized that success isn't something you wait to receive, but rather it's something you should build. What I like the most about Denzel is how he encapsulates how important setting goals and pushing for your dreams is. In an interview, he once said, "Dreams without goals are just dreams."
Dreams without goals, dreams without goals, dreams without goals are just dreams. A dream is not something you sit inside and wait for. It's something that only becomes real due to actions you put towards achieving that goal. Another person you could look at is Michael Jordan, who faced countless failures early on in his career. One of which was being cut from his high school varsity team. Maybe I led you to believe it was easy when it wasn't. Maybe I made you think that every shot I took was a game-winner. Maybe it's my fault that you didn't see that failure gave me strength, that my pain was my motivation. Or Kobe Bryant, who as a young buck growing up, "I wasn't invited to parties or you know, family friendly gatherings on the weekend. So on Fridays and Saturdays, I would go in my rec room with my basketball and basically dribble myself to sleep. And I think that that was the best thing that could have ever happened to me, 'cause during those lonely hours in the rec room, I discovered the hunger, the motivation, and desire to be the best possible basketball player I could be."
Many athletes or people would take that loss and stop entirely or get strayed away from what's important, believing it's a sign that it just wasn't meant to be. Whereas MJ or Kobe instead turned that loss or opportunities into fuel, choosing to take the necessary steps to get to the player we all remember them by.
"All right. All right. How you doing?"
Matthew McConaughey, an actor who early on in his career was locked into the rom-com guy. The problem with that is those movies never really itched the creative side of his brain. He always knew if he wanted to do something new, he had to change and enter a new chapter of his life.
"But I had that 4:00 AM in my solitude on my own truth that hit me that lands like a butterfly and strikes like a lightning bolt at the same time. That truth that you go, 'Okay, tomorrow when the sun comes up and I'm back in the masses and all the world's coming at me and all those offers, I need to remember this truth.'"
Now, I've been trying to get dramas and was even offering huge pay cuts, and they're like, "No, stay in your lane, MC. You're the rom-com guy. You got that down." Mind you, I enjoyed him, but I was wanting to do something different because I couldn't do what I wanted to do. I said, "I got to stop doing what I'm doing." So, I said, "No more rom-com." So, he stepped away from acting and refused to take up another script unless it was something he could genuinely get behind. One month passed, two months, a year. It got to a point where he thought maybe he made the wrong decision.
"18 months go by. I really think I've done it. I'm out."
Until...
"Um, I get this this romantic action."
After almost two years, a real shift had happened.
"20 months. Two months after I turned that down, the offers came in that I was looking for, and they came in in droves." Killer Joe, Mud, True Detective, Dallas Buyers Club, Magic Mike, Interstellar, Wolf of Wall Street.
The point is, if you take these examples, you start to notice a pattern. None of these people had any guarantees that things would work out. Yet, all of them made the same choice. They stopped waiting and stepped through the door.
Outside of real-world examples, the waiting room is something that happens in storytelling today through the eyes of some of our favorite characters. This sort of concept isn't new. While I may have given it the title of the waiting room, you could also see it as destiny, the call to adventure, a leap of faith. But regardless of the medium, the room remains the same. People often wait for the moment someone or somewhere will eventually tell them when they're ready.
When I think of this, my head instantly goes to Mob for Mob Psycho, and how throughout the show, he spends much of the story defining himself through how others see him instead of deciding who he wants to become. Miles Morales, a character who spends most of the first movie trapped between two worlds. After discovering he's been bitten and has powers, he seeks to search for the answer of the movie: What does it take to become Spider-Man? And in that realization, we get the leap of faith scene.
"A leap of faith."
Truman from The Truman Show, a story about a guy from birth who grew up in a world where every decision has been controlled until he takes the next step and figures out for himself the reality of the world he's in. The same sort of idea appears in stories like The Matrix, A Bug's Life, Star Wars, Dune, even comic book characters like Bruce Wayne dealing with his parents' death, coming up with the concept of Batman and what it took for him to fully embrace the mantle. Matt Murdoch, throughout many Daredevil stories, we see how he struggles between the life he once had as a lawyer and the responsibility he feels as Daredevil. Going even further, I think the relationship he has with his faith being Catholic and how he wrestles with moral decisions is what makes his character dichotomy so interesting. One of my favorite quotes from the show is when he decides to speak to the father about a dangerous situation, something that's been on his mind for weeks, and he says, "I'm not seeking penance for what I've done, father. I'm asking forgiveness for what I'm about to do." It's a line that perfectly captures who Matt Murdoch is. He's a person who knows the cost of his choices, yet feels compelled to make them anyway.
What's interesting with just these examples I use is that every single one of them knows the reality of the situation. At some point, every character reaches the same conclusion. The life they're waiting for is sitting on the other side of a door that was never locked. The only thing keeping it closed was a belief that someone else had that key.
Take a look at some of these characters and you tell me what do you think they all have in common. We have Naruto, Zuko, Megamind, Ricardo, Nina, and Marty Mouser. At first, they seem completely different: a shinobi, a prince, a villain, a boxer, a dancer, and a ping-pong player. But underneath all of it, you're chasing the same thing, more or less. The desire to be seen, the acknowledgement, and to finally be recognized.
In the early stages of Naruto, Naruto spends much of his life waiting for the acknowledgement from the village. His dream of finally becoming Hokage is ultimately a desire to prove that he matters and belongs. Zuko initially seeks his father's approval and does everything he can to restore his honor. However, he eventually realizes that true honor isn't something that can be bestowed upon by someone else. Rather, it's a personal journey that he must define on his own. Megamind, on the other hand, just wants to be seen more than a villain. Rico spends his entire life trying to prove he is special after being rejected and the desire to prove that his life has value and that he belongs in the world that's constantly overlooked him. Nina chases perfection in the pursuit of becoming the best. And Marty is, well, he's kind of a parasite if we're being honest. But above that, he's waiting for the world to acknowledge that he is the very best.
This is the waiting room in its most subtle form. It's the kind of characters where, in their eyes, approval from mentors, recognition from peers, a proof that they belong in the spaces they're trying to enter is far more important. But for others, the waiting room runs deeper than just approval. It could be something as simple as a meaning, a purpose, the sense that what they're doing is not just seen or accepted, but is instead necessary. I think for many, even outside of entertainment, this is one of the most relatable and recognized ones. I think what holds most people back from pushing forward is not finding a proper purpose or meaning.
One of my favorite films of all time is a movie titled Fight Club. It's a movie where the number one rule of the film is that "Do not talk about Fight Club." But I think I'm going to break that rule. The film follows a man who is called the narrator. The narrator is a character who is completely stuck in life. He lives a pretty unfulfilled life in the sense that for him, it doesn't feel like nothing and he hasn't achieved anything. He goes through the motions, shows up every day for work, and exists inside of a system. But nothing he does feels real or meaningful. But because of this lifestyle, he eventually becomes severely sleep-deprived and mentally worn down. And his sense of reality starts to blur. And so, instead of moving forward, he starts searching for something that would make him feel awake and in control of his own direction.
The turning point of the movie is when he meets a character named...
"And this is how I met Tyler Durden. Did you know if you mix equal parts of gasoline and frozen orange juice concentrate, you can make napalm?"
"No, I did not know that."
Tyler is quite literally the opposite of his lifestyle.
"He kind of lives his life how he wants to and acts instead of overthinking. He represents everything the narrator feels he isn't. Confident, direct, unfiltered, and fully in control of his own direction."
It's a story built on many themes and life lessons that still hold true to today. In some cases, the story covers many topics like identity, control, consumerism, masculinity, and the pressure of modern life to define who you are through routines and possessions.
"Advertising has us chasing cars and clothes, working jobs we hate so we can buy [ __ ] we don't need."
Tyler takes the most hardcore route when it comes to certain things.
"State that there is no underground group or these guys are going to take your balls."
"No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Wait, wait, wait, wait."
But I think the messaging behind it is what matters.
"But uh, it's kind of hard to defend this."
"Raymond was..."
"What did you want to be?"
"Veterinarian. Veterinarian animals."
"Yeah, animals. So..."
"Stuff. Yeah, I got that. That means you have to get more schooling."
"Too much school."
"Would you rather be dead?"
"No."
"I know where you live."
"If you're not on your way to becoming a veterinarian in six weeks, you will be dead. I run on him."
"I feel ill."
"Imagine how he feels."
"Come on. This is..."
"Okay. But what about other examples of this? Well, we can look at characters like Frodo from Lord of the Rings, Simon from Gurren Lagann. Hell, if you really wanted to, you could even say Luffy and how his change comes from his desire of becoming the Pirate King."
The hardest part isn't knowing what you should do. It's finding the courage to actually walk forward when nothing is forcing you to stay except yourself. But there's one more example that I want to talk about that sits beneath all of them. One that feels more subtle, more reasonable, and for that exact reason could be a little bit more dangerous in a sense. It's waiting for the perfect moment.
Waiting for the ideal moment is kind of like a mental image we create where we sort of envision a future where everything seems to align perfectly. The problem with this is that no such reality truly exists. The biggest things in life often happen when we aren't ready. But you could argue that in a way, waiting for that ideal moment sort of acts as a safeguard for ourselves. You never have to face the possibility that all your effort might not lead to success. It's one of the main reasons why stories often reject the idea of a perfect timing, at least not in the sense of overcoming a new chapter. Characters are often forced into action before they feel ready. If they waited for everything to line up perfectly, then the progression of a story would quite literally never happen. There would always be a reason to push back or some sort of condition that isn't quite right.
Life doesn't actually open a clean door and announce when it's ready. There is no moment where everything aligns perfectly. It's all about taking that risk and doing something you love. Jim Carrey once said that, "So many of us choose our path out of fear disguised as practicality. What we really want seems impossibly out of reach and ridiculous to expect. So we never dare to ask the universe for it. I'm saying I'm the proof that you can ask the universe for it. My father could have been a great comedian, but he didn't believe that that was possible for him. And so, he made a conservative choice. Instead, he got a safe job as an accountant. And when I was 12 years old, he was let go from that safe job. And our family had to do whatever we could to survive. I learned many great lessons from my father, not the least of which was that you can fail at what you don't want. So, you might as well take a chance on doing what you love."
No matter what you do, every story eventually reaches the same moment. The moment when those elevator doors open. The moment where possibility all of a sudden becomes reality. And standing between those two things is often just one person: yourself. Not the future, not some fate or some perfect timing. Just a version of yourself that's still holding back for some reason. So take the step. Stop waiting to do whatever it is you set aside. Chase your dreams, don't leave any regrets, and live a life worth living.
Shaking like 12, sneaking out of the classroom by the back door. A man at me twice, though, but I didn't care. Waiting is wasted for people like me. Don't try to live so wise. Don't cry 'cause you're so right. Don't try.