We've got one woman who admits she hasn't watched the content, hasn't done the homework, hasn't even finished the video, but somehow already knows she's offended. That's modern confidence right there. No facts, no context, just vibes and volume. This isn't a debate. This is what happens when truth walks in the room and ego immediately calls for backup. Watch how fast accountability turns into interruptions. Watch how curiosity turns into attitude. And watch how humor disappears the moment the mirror gets turned around.

Hit like, subscribe, and support Kevin Samuel's original channel to help keep his legacy alive.

>> Hello.

>> Hey, how are you?

>> I'm well. And yourself?

>> Good. We were just watching your live, looking at some of your content.

>> Mhm.

>> I heard about you, but I don't really know much about you. My I just came to my best friend's house and she was saying she was looking at your videos and she was offended by your content, but I haven't seen it, so I don't know what is supposedly so offensive about you.

>> The truth.

>> Okay. The truth is that the truth tends to offend many women today. But you know what? Who's not offended? The eight black couples that have gotten together in the last six months and the three black women who have gotten engaged in their last six months of knowing me and and credit my groups and and credit my groups and my information as a reason why they're that way. So, um I don't know three black women getting married and one found a multi-million dollar attorney. So why is your friend pissed off again?

>> No one's pissed off. You just you just be feeling like you're entitled.

>> Excuse me.

>> You feel entitled like

>> Yeah. See this woman doesn't know me. And see see and instead of saying you know what I didn't know that and that's a good thing. I appreciate that eight black couples have gotten together and three black families are about to be good. Nope. Nope. Instead of saying that, instead of saying a good thing, she wants to be off camera. If you gonna talk, at least get on camera. Don't Don't be Don't be like that.

>> She's like,

>> "You going to have a smoke? Bring your ass on camera."

>> She's like in a little pearl like in her night clothes and stuff. The person whose live that I'm on, I'm on her live.

>> Oh, okay. Well, anyway, I will talk to you because obviously you seem to have a different energy. Yeah, ma'am. People don't come on to my show just because I'm rude and just and if why would 15,000 people show up nightly if I was full of [ __ ] lying, and just being rude, mean?

>> So, what do you make any sense?

>> So, what do you think is are people's issue about you?

>> The truth.

>> But what

>> I think I think I think that I think that one of the biggest issues are this last video that happened where a woman rated herself being average. And I agreed. And then when I said,

>> "Do you think the woman's value is in the way that she looks?"

>> Uh, well, let me ask you a Okay, let me ask you a question. How old are you?

>> 27.

>> 27. Is a man's value in how productive he is?

>> I feel like everyone's value should be in their character. So, yes.

>> No, no. I said a man's value is in how productive he is.

>> Yes. And a woman's as well. But I don't feel like it.

>> No, no, no, no, no. Man, I asked you a is a man's okay.

>> And a woman's value to a man, men are visual. Initially, it is how you look.

>> Okay.

>> But my question is, why do modern women reject what women for thousands of years have accepted

>> but expect men to still be the same way? You still expect men to provide. Right.

>> Right. But I don't think that's only to the extent of physical appearance. I feel like if you compensate, you can always compensate in other ways. Like I've I've seen and and we've all seen it to where maybe it'll be a very attractive guy with a woman who is not conventionally as attractive and he does value her and he loves her and

>> All right. But okay, how about this? Get a hundred of your male friends and ask them what they want.

>> No, I understand. Study.

>> That's what I'm saying. And that's the thing. I agree. And that's the And that's the point. I am saying what men would say. I am saying what men would say. And the issue is women have no problem saying, "I want a man who's 6' tall, six figure, six-pack. I don't want no scrubs. Ain't nothing going on but the rent. I don't want no." But then when a man says he just has a standard two, that's all of a sudden an issue.

>> Well, I don't have to have somebody six feet. You as long as you're two inches taller than me. I'm 5'9. But exact.

>> But hold on, ma'am. Hold on. But ma'am, but that still is a standard. That still is a preference and men have theirs as well. See what we've told women have preferences. I'm not I'm not

>> but apparently not. Apparently not because women can have their preferences and

>> Well, we're generalizing right now. Hold on. Hold on. Hold on. Hold on. Women have been putting they have been memorializing what they want in movie and song for my entire life. when men just have the nerve to respond when asked, all of a sudden we're entitled in toxic masculinity.

>> I don't I don't think that you guys are are entitled by wanting preferences. First of all, I will say that

>> okay,

>> what my I'm not disputing that. Like everyone is entitled to have their whatever that you know that they want. But what I'm saying is that I don't it seems like what you're saying and I'm and correct me if I'm wrong is that a woman's like her value in all is

>> I never said absolute no no see that's another thing you have to tell me where

>> that's what I'm telling you I'm not telling you that's what

>> well that's the thing I I have never said that I have never said that forefront of the conversation is kind of okay let me send it can I get it out Okay.

>> If you you ask me to tell you then when I tell you you talking over me.

>> No, but I'm conversing with you cuz I want you to

>> You're not conversing cuz I'm only You're the only one talking. Man, have you watched one of my videos? A three-hour video from front to back.

>> That girl situation when he was ranking that girl.

>> You're not paying attention.

>> When he was What? Talk to him.

>> Have you watched one of my video? Have you watched a full video of mine from front to back? One of one of my live streams.

>> I just saw I just saw one video. Um, was it the whole I think it was a whole video of some girl when you when you were

>> I guess she ranking her.

>> He was ranking her. He asked her what her what her

>> asked her what she ranked herself.

>> So in other words, no. I have a full three-hour show that I do and you watched a 7 minute clip of a 30 minute conversation I had. I challenge you and your friend to go back to my channel and watch the full 30 minute now. See, I'm not going to do this. If you either going to get on the camera, I'm not going to talk to I'm not I'm not doing this with her. Either I'm going to talk to you or we're going to have to do be in if she's going to get on the camera, get on the camera.

>> The contest.

>> So, I'm just I mean, I guess

>> No, ma'am. Ma'am, see here's See, then this is the problem.

>> But but but you haven't even you haven't even responded to what I said. This is when women say become disingenuous. asking me questions. You're saying something and I said, "You have not even watched the video from front to back. You haven't even watched the full video of where the exerpt was coming from." And then, but your friend has the nerve to make a judgment. And I find that very rich that women have no problem judging men on partial information, please.

>> No, I'm I will generalize women because I speak to I will I will general I will generalize women when I have enough information to be general. And you act you women are acting just like so many women who get upset. You have little to no information. You're not willing to do the work and then when I challenge you to do something else, you

>> I didn't accuse you of anything. Have you noticed I I literally just asked you what is your philosophy? Like what what is it that you think people are upset about? I literally came in with no judgment

>> and I said no. No, but as we have gotten into it, you asked me and I said the truth.

>> The concept,

>> right? But but more so what I'm asking you about is what we're talking about now. like I haven't I haven't made any assumptions based on anything that I've seen previously. Me and you are conversing and we've had and I've talked to you enough to ask you certain questions and what you're responding to. I'm responding back to it. So you're you're referring to past videos, but I'm referring to the things that you're telling me now.

>> The only question you ask me the only question you ask me is a woman's value.

>> Then you're also the only question you ask me how old I am. But you don't even let me you don't even let other people talk. You're asking me how old I am. You're generalizing women.

>> I mean, there's just no talking to some of these people. And like your unattractive friend who did not want to get on the camera with all that masculine energy, women like her are angry at the truth. This is why this will always work. I mean, just angry. Why are you mad? Yes. And you're alone. You're alone. And you will likely end up like most women like you, dying alone. And no amount of being angry, upset, argumentative, vile, disgusting, masculine, rude is going to change what your outcome is going to be. And that's what bothers so many of these ladies because they're having to face the fact that many women like her are simply unfit for relationship. Thank you. She put a cute friend on the camera cuz we know, come on. And even if she was attractive, your personality is through. I mean, reverting the curse words. I mean, you want to You ain't doing this. You ain't doing Look, you a You haven't even bothered to watch the video. And like I say, you cannot make this stuff up. You can't make it up. And women like your friend are becoming the laughingstock. I don't understand if women like you really understand how the world is looking at y'all right now. There's nothing to aspire to, nothing to be proud of, and all you end up having at the end of the day is just insults. Petty childhood taunts. Insults. And then when you get met back with that same kind of mirror, you can't handle it. Thank you for proving my point. Thank you for proving my point. She's facility to sit back and arbit to sit back and just go do the work yourself. But instead, the low level of contempt and lack of respect so many women like her have for the average black man. I'm not going to go what? Go watch a video. I'm not going to watch a video of you. You're just a black man. Go do homework and research what you said. How dare you expect me to do that? You're just a black man. You're beneath me. No. No. Instead, I'm going to question you like you're 27 even though you're 51. and I'm going to have this miscellaneous black woman talk to you like you're 27 and 51 years old. There's no respect. So, ma'am, thank you for proving my point. Don't argue [ __ ] they are going I am going to continue to do exactly what I'm doing and I am going to become very very successful at continuing to push forward the women who want see what's going on right now is a separation the women who want to be with men and all the others see the woman who wanted to be with men was like that woman who showed up the first woman that came in with the hair done smiles and the pearls that's a woman who wanted to be with the other sister who came in. See the women who came in like the last other woman, just compare and contrast. You can tell the women who wanted to be with men versus the other ones. And that's what this does. It helps you separate the ones that you need to just say, "Hey sis, do you don't argue with them. Just leave them over there." The ones that don't with all that masculine energy, they got to argue with them. But now the pro now what's happening is the separation is happening and women are starting to say I don't want to be like her. I don't want to be like her and I don't want to hang with her. That's what's going on. Women are starting to separate themselves from their negative energy friends. And to the 27 year old that I was speaking to, I hope you get away from that woman cuz you sound like you might have had a ch a shot, but her, she would never let you hear anything other than what she wants you to believe. I simply ask you to go watch the video, but she ain't going to let you do that. Go watch it. She can't keep you from watching it cuz no matter what you say, you cannot sit down and make this a character truth. Well, everybody's wrong. It's just a bunch of woman hating the women b then go watch the video. Go look at it for yourself. All the videos are up. Go look at it for yourself. Don't listen to what she's telling you it is. Go watch it. I dare you. And then what'll happen? You'll do just like so many other sisters have done. You know what? I'm wrong. When I first approached you, I thought it was this and now it's that. I thought it was this and now it's that. And also remember when I said, "What about the eight black couples that have gotten together in the last six months as a result of my Facebook group and the three one, two, three engagements?" You notice they didn't address that at all. Now, if Steve if somebody else had said that or a woman had said that, they'd have got it. But they cannot you will not give a black man that you disagree with any credit when the testimonials are up on YouTube. Go look at it for yourself. The videos are up. The video testimonials saying, "Thank you, Kevin, for helping me find my wife. Thank you, Kevin, for helping me get getting together my booth. Thank you. They're up." But I put it on the wood. But again, that is the extent that so many women like that woman off the screen don't matter. You are a black man and you are to be disrespected because you are there's no such thing. There are women like her that say there no such thing as high value black men. You're all scrubs. We're all dusty. We're all busted. We're all crap. And that's why I do what I do. Because women will women like that woman will tell you, "Well, if you go do this and do this, do this, do this, then I'll submit. Then I'll be this and I'll be that." And then when you do all that, they'll just move the goalpost. That's why I say you can't win with those. So, it's better to find out who they are and just let them be and go on over with the women that want to be different. And the women who want to be different, this is the time where you raise your hand and say, "I'm not like them. I'm not like them. I see where that ends. I see where it ends and it ends poorly. I don't want to end up like my mama, my big mama, my auntie, na na n I want to do something different. What you want to do is learn how to get along with the men who share your reflection. Oh, I'm gonna post it. I'mma post it everywhere. I'm going to post it. I'm going to boost it, but you can't post it. Also, by the way, uh I said it before, I said it again. Don't just go upload my videos without asking my permission. You just upload my content without asking my permission. Um, that's not cool. And I don't And I'm not going to just sit around and ask you questions. They'll just be coming down. I'm not like them. Thank you very much. Most women aren't like them. Most women aren't like them. Just like most black men want to marry black Just like most black men want to marry black women. Most people are decent. It's just the people who aren't have had the microphone too long. It's time for the people who want something better to start speaking up to start drowning out that foolishness. I am so glad that you called in, ma'am. I'm so glad that your friend let you use our account because this is a perfect way to end it. I started a broadcast trying to help put women with men. That's what the whole purpose of this was for, to use my platform to highlight the best of women and the best of men. Put them together. That's the purpose. That's the reason. And I've talked to women who wanted those things, talked about the couples that have already got together, but then you still get somebody like that who has the nerve to come in and say, just come through kicking stuff over. Forget all that. I'mma just piss and crap all over your stuff. Thank you for twerking on my furniture. Thank you for twerking on my furniture. That's what we do. Thank you for twerking on the furniture. And when they twerk on your furniture, you don't argue with them. You just have security usher them out. You don't let them back in. Till next time, peace out.

>> And this right here is why these conversations matter. Not because everybody's going to like what's being said. They won't. Not because everybody's going to agree. They never do. But because the truth has a way of cutting through noise when people are finally quiet enough to hear it. What you just watched wasn't an argument. It wasn't a gender war. It wasn't somebody trying to win. It was a live example of how far apart expectations and reality have drifted and how uncomfortable it gets when those two collide in real time. This is what happens when people form opinions without doing the work. When feelings show up before facts and when confidence is built on repetition instead of results. Nobody is saying you don't deserve love. Nobody is saying you don't deserve happiness. But what is being said and what keeps getting ignored is that outcomes matter more than intentions. You don't get points for being offended. You don't get rewarded for being loud. And you don't get relationships just because you feel entitled to one. Real growth starts when you stop talking long enough to listen. Real change starts when you stop defending everything and start examining something. And real relationships don't come from vibes, clips, or opinions. They come from accountability, self-awareness, and understanding what the other side actually values, not what you wish they valued. If this conversation bothered you, that's not automatically a bad thing. Discomfort is often the first sign that something hit closer to home than expected. The question is what you do next. Do you dismiss it, mock it, and scroll on? Or do you sit with it, think about it, and ask yourself some hard questions when nobody's watching? This channel isn't here to coddle egos, or protect illusions. It's here to have the conversations people avoid, the ones that don't trend well, but matter long term. And if you're one of the people who's tired of the noise, tired of the confusion, and tired of pretending everything is fine when it clearly isn't, then you're in the right place. We're going to keep having these conversations. We're going to keep challenging narratives. And we're going to keep separating emotion from reality because clarity beats comfort every single time. If you made it this far, you already know this wasn't for everyone, but it was for somebody. We'll see you on the next one.

Tonight's callers both say they believe in God, but Kevin quickly points out that faith does not erase consequences. The first caller is 22 years old with a one-year-old daughter, admitting she realized becoming a baby mama was a mistake only after she was already pregnant. The second caller says she's proof that single mothers can still get high value men because she's currently dating one. But once Kevin starts asking deeper questions about marriage, accountability, dating options, and what high value men actually want, both conversations take a hard turn.

>> Say hello.

>> Sorry, I didn't I didn't know if you were talking. So, hey, how are you? Where did I get wrong?

>> I don't think you're wrong. Um, I personally am spiritual, religious, um, whatever you would call it, but um, I am 22. I have a one-year-old.

>> Uh-oh.

>> Um,

>> where's where's where's the child's father?

>> He's he's around. He's very active.

>> Are you are you were you married?

>> I was not. So, you're a baby mama?

>> I am. Yep. I messed up.

>> I'm Hey, I I I'm just saying that's what it gets called.

>> Yeah.

>> Um, go ahead.

>> Yeah. So, I kind of I had the wake up quote unquote while I was pregnant of all the reasons why you shouldn't be a baby mama when I was already a baby mama.

>> So, um, now

>> you didn't know that before? I've never really

>> Were you raised with your dad?

>> I wasn't. But my mom was married to my dad, but it was a abusive situation. So, she left him when she was pregnant with me. So, I never really But you knew. I mean, you're 22. You live in this country. You know it's better to have two parent household. I mean, you didn't know that. It's not that I didn't know it. It's more so it's like

>> Did you go to college?

>> I am finishing college currently.

>> Okay. What are you what are you getting your degree in?

>> Finance.

>> And then what do you plan on doing with your degree?

>> Um being a financial analyst.

>> And what does the father do? Is he was he in school?

>> No.

>> What does he do? He just does um like construction work and stuff.

>> So you are a college student and got pregnant by a guy who came on to the campus. It was somebody who was also in college, but um I knew him since like high school and it was it was it was more so stupidity on my end of um

>> How many girls did you see walking? So, what what's what do you go is it a commuter college that you go to or is there dorms and stuff?

>> No, I went to community college.

>> Community college? So, are you getting a associates or you getting a bachelor's?

>> Oh, now I'm getting a bachelor's through my job like on online school. Um, but before I was going to community college.

>> All right. Sorry.

>> So, ultimately, what did you have? What did you want to bring into this? Cuz at 21 years old, 21 or 22?

>> 22.

>> 22 with a oneyear-old boy or girl?

>> Girl.

>> Why didn't you just marry this man? Um, as I said during my pregnancy, I saw all of the quote unquote mask come off and um, he is not marriage material at all. And um,

>> yeah, it was

>> I don't know what that means. Ma'am, you had a baby with a man. I got pregnant and then he decided to um

>> How old is he?

>> He's 24. I got pregnant and he decided to have three girlfriends on the side of me during my pregnancy.

>> That's why I didn't want to marry him.

>> Well, and what and what state do you live in?

>> Texas.

>> Let me be brutally honest with you ladies. 21 or 22 years old with a one-year-old, you basically screwed the pooch. You picked the man you decided to carry a child to term for. No one accepts I was young and I made a mistake. That that excuse does not work anymore. A child gets born because a woman wants to carry a child to term. So what what is done at this point?

>> Um well, you have to ex truthfully truthfully you're going to have to accept that you have seriously impacted your chances of well high value men are pretty much out. I mean how tall are you?

>> I'm 5'4.

>> Dress size

>> six.

>> Six.

>> Okay. High value men are effectively out. Even if you even if you were pretty. No one wants to raise another man's child, much less a loser. So that's what you've done. And struggle as though you may try to widget it around. Guys will take you out. Guys will make you a side chick, a friend with benefit. But to get the ring of a high value man is going to be like hitting the lottery. Cuz why would somebody this again there are women out there who don't have children and baby daddy I mean reasonably why would a man want to be a stepfather and not have the full authority and he's going to have full full responsibility for that child. So,

>> well, I I actually just um ended a relationship like about a month ago.

>> Um I dated him for about 6 months.

>> How long is your child?

>> She's one.

>> God damn.

>> Yeah.

>> Yeah. It was somebody that was basically waiting for their chance.

>> Well, hold on, hold on, hold on. Let's not let's not just be that cavalier about that, man. You also wanting to get back on the get back on the ride. Can't just let you just mean by that.

>> I can't just let you come through and and throw a shot at a man like that. I was waiting to get their chance. Did y'all were y'all intimate?

>> No. Not. Well, towards the end of the relationship, yes. But I'm saying I knew him for

>> Exactly. So, you needed somebody to help you get over your BD as well? No,

>> no, not at all.

>> Okay. Right. Anyway, we keep on moving. Net net of it is 22 one year old. You have effectively removed high value men. You could get a degree in finance and be a financial analyst and making $60,000 a year and have a white collar job. But a guy who's making a h 100,000 plus is going to go pick a woman with no children.

>> So you think women with children period don't have a chance?

>> Not for high value men. Not unless you're Not unless you're pretty, beautiful, or gorgeous. Now you have a son or a daughter? Which one is it?

>> I have a daughter.

>> A daughter. Uh, will if you found if you got a high value man, would he be able to discipline your daughter like he was his? Would he be a give her a whooping if he needed to?

>> Yes.

>> he would be able to.

>> Yes.

>> Cuz I grew up with a stepdad. So,

>> and and your and your and your BD would have nothing to say about it.

>> It wouldn't matter.

>> Yes, it would, ma'am. See, I've been See, let me explain Let me explain something. Let me explain something to you. I've been a stepfather and I've had to deal with a crazy ex-husband.

>> I've seen this. Ma'am, understand something. I know what you want to tell yourself. That I was young. I made a mistake. I'm a good woman. I'm cute. And there's somebody who's going to give Okay, ma'am. Sure, you could hit the lottery, but more likely than not, you're not going to get a high value man because what do they want? Do do the men that you think the kind of men that you want do you want to have more children?

>> Um I'd be open to it.

>> So the answer is no. So the answer is no.

>> I would be able to I'm saying I would be open to

>> do you want to have more children? That's a yes or no.

>> Yes.

>> Okay. Women who want to have more children don't say they'd be open to it. I'm saying I would be open to it because if I came across a man who didn't want children, I would be fine with not having any more children. But if he did want children, I would be open to having one or two more children.

>> You'd be open to having what?

>> One or two more children.

>> One or two more children. Okay. Again, I I get it. You had a stepfather. Different generation, different times. Men aren't doing that like that anymore. People aren't even getting married like they used to. I know what you want to hear, ma'am. But the marital rates for baby for for for unwed mothers in the black community is atrocious. A husband is what you can expect. You and you want one of the Do you want to have to work to pay significant bills after you're pregnant again? I would like to work in the future, but I would like to take like two or three years off. So that the answer is no. That means that man needs to be able to make enough money to cover replace your income.

>> Mhm.

>> Pay for your daughter, the new baby, and him. That means in Texas, you're going to be talking about a man who's making $200,000 or more. And men that make that kind of money don't go marry baby mas. Why is that so troubling or difficult for you just to accept?

>> So it's not necessarily troubling for me to accept. It's just

>> I basically no matter you're saying no matter what I do

>> No, ma'am. I of course now come on ma'am. Let's be reasonable. I'm not Cararnack. I can't tell the future. I'm giving you the odds and the predictions or statistics. I cannot say with 100% certainty. But what I can say is this. Men with options choose women that don't have children. They can wait. They don't have to pick you. Why are you still trying to put this square peg in a round hole? Here's the thing. You knew you were having a child before marriage and you chose to do it anyway. You knew there was going to be a consequence with that.

>> Yes or no?

>> Yes.

>> Or I mean or or or not? Or did you think, hey, it's no big deal. I got a kid, but everybody got kids, so it's really not that big a deal. I mean, I'm going to school to get my finance. I can take care of it. So, you know what? It's all good. I mean, I know there are some women out there that think like that, too.

>> I The way that I viewed it was more so it would be harder for me alone as a single mother cuz I've seen my mom during the single mother phase before she was remarried. So, I knew that part would be hard. But as for actually finding someone to marry, I've never really heard that being an issue.

>> Exact. Well, let me tell you, welcome to reality. It's an issue. Men don't want to be stepfathers. And by choosing to have a child before marriage, I say it again. You have effectively ended opportunities to get high value man. Now, what's wrong with getting a man who's just average middle class driving for UPS working for the Horale plant or something making $40, $50,000 a year in Texas?

>> So, for me, it's a lot. I actually that's why I brought up the last relationship that I had that I ended a month ago

>> because what's wrong with it, ma'am? I got other people to get to. Please, would you would you deal with that or not?

>> I I I can't. No, you can't. No, you can't. So, in So, in other words, you're you're a woman, a young woman who had a baby outside of marriage. You're a baby mama. And because you're going to school and a financial analyst, you think you should have somebody on your level higher. That's hypergamy. I understand, ma'am. But you're not going to get it. You're overvaluing yourself. That's the thing. So many of our sisters drastically overvalue themselves. What would you What would you rank yourself on the looks scale from 0 to 10? You cannot use seven. I mean, you just said Beyonce was eight.

>> Yes, cuz she is.

>> What would that make you?

>> I normally I'm sorry.

>> What would that make you?

>> I I I would say that would make me a seven, but you just said I

>> You can't use seven. I Because I'm a professional image consultant and I do this in real life. See, I'm I'm a professional at what I do and I'm good at what I do. See, what I've done is I've I've given you reality that you have not paid for. If you had to pay me, I'd be telling you the same thing. Ma'am, at best, you're probably a six cuz you're not an eight at Beyonce level. I can't use seven cuz every averagel looking cute woman tries to give herself more points. But, but at a six, how what but does your child cost you if you're a six? What does your child cost you? Does it give you a point?

>> Does it?

>> No.

>> Does it cost you something?

>> What does it cost you?

>> I wouldn't know because it would depend on

>> It cost you It cost you points. It cost you points. Children cost two points. One child cost two points. Two kids cost three points. So if you're six, you effectly dropped yourself down to four. That's unattractive. An unattractive woman for a high value man. Ma'am, understand you want a man who's making six figures plus you to not be able to work. Do you? And you don't know these men. But if you go talk to these men, they'll tell you they don't want women who are baby mamas. And they don't have to pick them. If every black man in this country got married tomorrow, 2 million black women will be left over. You need to level set where you really are in this marketplace and get realistic or go on the other side and you will become what I consider to be an eternal seven. Go look at the video. But that's what you're sounding like. A woman who has a degree, who's cuter than most, young, and you'll go bouncing around in relationships for the next eight years. And by the age of 30, you'll be one bitter woman.

>> So instead, I should settle first.

>> No, ma'am. First off, first off, see, first off, see that's Let me take that word out of your vocabulary. Settle. Someone is settling for you. Someone raising another man's child is settling for you. See, that is one thing you women got really twisted. Take that out of your vocabulary. You have a child for by another man. You are no prize. I'm sorry, man, but that's just the way it is for all women. A man coming to take care of another man's offspring is settling. That's a beta male move. I've done it. You you you baby mas got it really twisted. I understand you can love your child and your child is special, but all it is to another man is a damn bill. And what's the difference?

>> All right, that's it.

>> That's it. You're not going to listen.

>> No,

>> it's not going to listen.

>> Peace out. Hello.

>> Hello.

>> Hi.

>> Hello. How do I pronounce your first name?

>> Chatana.

>> Chatana. How are you?

>> Yes, sir.

>> I'm doing well. How are you? Oh, I'm good. So, what did I get wrong? Tell me tell me what I did wrong cuz apparently I don't know what I'm talking about.

>> Well, I wouldn't say you're doing anything wrong. You're doing a good job. Actually, I wanted to um call in because I am a Christian woman. And when you say that um high value men are kind of out of the category for certain women, I want to say that my situation I guess is like a diamond in the rough type of situation because I know that I have cut off my chances because I can rate myself as a six. I have a one child, a son, and I'm a baby mama.

>> All of that jazz. But God has blessed me with the boyfriend that I have now who is a high value man

>> and I am just ecstatic at this point because I know that I don't deserve this but I have it. Does that make sense?

>> Yeah. Um, do you want to get married?

>> I do.

>> Okay. Uh, how long have you guys been together?

>> It's a year and two months.

>> Does he have any children?

>> No.

>> No. Is he Is he older or younger than you?

>> He's He's older by one month.

>> Okay. Uh have you guys been together for a year and a half? Um, why why are you guys not uh engaged?

>> Well, it's a year and and two months, but why we're not engaged?

>> Yeah.

>> All it takes is all it takes is 6 months.

>> You're right.

>> I know.

>> He has definitely asked. He's He has mentioned that he definitely wants to get married.

>> He said he wants to marry you.

>> He did. He said he wants to marry me. He's spoken to my father apparently. I just found out

>> about a week or two ago. So I guess it's in the works and it must be a surprise.

>> Okay. Uh what does he do for a living?

>> He is an engineer.

>> Okay. What do you do?

>> I work in collection. So I'm that person you don't want calling.

>> No. No. I'll just hang up on your ass. Uh, so here's the thing. Yes, it can happen. Um, but what are the odds?

>> Yes.

>> So, I mean, I I'll take everything you say at face value. Um, but you're how old? 31.

>> I'm 29.

>> 29. Do you want to have any more children?

>> I do. I want two more. Does he want children?

>> He does. He actually wants five.

>> And where's your father at?

>> My father is about 2 hours away from me. So, he's in my life. We just don't live in the same town.

>> Okay. Well, if he's uh, you know, spoken to your father, I Yeah, let me know when the engagement happens.

>> I will call you and let you know. But but here's the thing. What would you what would you tell women who are in your position then?

>> That's a good one. So in my position, spend a lot of time seeking knowledge like with this channel for instance and um just reading and just getting to know yourself because I honestly think a lot of women jump on this bandwagon of thinking they should be hypergamous and they have unrealistic expectations and that's very toxic and I'm noticing that a lot and not just the black community but even my girlfriends. I come from a Native American reserve. So, even the Native American women that are my friends have the same toxic mentality. So, it's not just the black community from what I've noticed personally.

>> All right, I got I'm going move on to the next color, but I would say say this that I would tell women cuz you're you weren't you were B. I would tell women don't do what I did. That's honestly what I want to hear women like you tell women to do. Don't do what I did. Not how to fix what I did. don't do what I did. And until we can start having women like yourself who say you're getting a different outcome tell women don't do what I did. We're not going to fix this. Cuz they will hear what you said and they'll think see

>> don't do what I did lady. But that but what I'm saying is though that needs to be top of if you really because I mean if everything what you're saying is true you are an anomaly. It's you know it's a one in one what? One in 100.

>> Hello.

>> Yeah. So we need to be telling women not to do that. Uh, but let me know. Send me uh information when you when you get uh the send me pictures of the ring. Thanks.

>> Okay.

>> Bye-bye.

>> Thank you.

>> Bye-bye. Lonnie. Hello.

>> Hi. Hi.

>> I'm just wondering what's wrong with waiting on God to send you a husband.

>> Excuse me.

>> What's wrong? Okay. What's the topic?

>> Um, why should God send you a high value husband? Yeah. What's wrong with that?

>> Who are you?

>> Who am I?

>> Yeah, I don't know your name. You haven't introduced yourself. Will you just start questioning me like I like I owe you an explanation? That's the normal thing that people do is they introduce each other and you kind of talk first. You don't just start trying to check people.

>> I'm sorry.

>> Um,

>> hi. Your name is

>> Hi, my name is Lonnie.

>> Lonnie. Hi, I'm Kevin. Nice to meet you. How old are you?

>> I'm 21.

>> 21. Do you have any children?

>> No.

>> Okay. So, uh, why are you in the Are you a Christian?

>> Yeah.

>> All right. And why should why should God do you want to get married?

>> Yes.

>> Are you a wife?

>> Um,

>> um, maybe not right now.

>> Then why should God send you a husband? Period.

>> Cuz I'm going to be a wife.

>> No, no, no. See, see, young lady, you want to do this, well, do it. If you're a Christian, how does the scripture go? He who what?

>> He who finds a wife is a good thing.

>> Say again.

>> He who finds a wife is a good thing.

>> He who findeth a wife finds a good thing.

>> Yeah.

>> What does that mean?

>> That means Oh, dang. I don't know what that means.

>> That's That's pretty sad.

>> Yeah.

>> I mean, you call me asking me questions and you don't even know what that means. You're a Christian?

>> Yeah.

>> Yeah. All this is recorded. Silly little girls. Look like Miss Piggy over there. This this sad. This is all right. Grace, we're going to go ahead and bounce you out. Square dance rap. So, at the end of the day, here's what it comes right down to. God does not owe you a husband. Stop walk around being married to Jesus. If you're not doing something, if you're not a wife, like that last silly little caller. Let me go get me some more Cheetos and hot funions. Yeah. Okay. You know when somebody's face is in the whole frame like damn you can enlarge the frame. Oh I'm sorry. Your face fit in that little box. All right. Seriously though, we got to the church is not the modern prosperity church is not helping black women. Black women. Black men are not going to church. They don't want to hear preachers preach that prosperity gospel. They don't want to hear women with multiple children think it's no nothing's wrong. They don't want to hear callers like the caller that I had before who just thinks, "Hey, I got a kid." You know, no big deal. Yeah, that's a lot of wrong having a kid out of like if you want men at a certain level. And the net net of it is God should not send you anything. Anything you want out of this life, you got to work for it. Faith without works is dead. God is not a cosmic sugar daddy. He's not celestial Santa Claus. He's not a genie. You're up for three wishes. If you want something, you better get out there like Becky Ming Marisol and Anu and compete because you got to understand something ladies. Your looks and your weight tell the men what you think they deserve. Say it again. Your looks and your weight tell men what you think they deserve. And men can look at your looks and your weight and see that you don't think they deserve much. 5'4, 200 lb. You telling men you don't deserve nothing but this. Take me as I am. And men are saying, "Nope. I'd rather go solo." You got men in you got men who are just cashing out. Never before have men walked away. So understand something. Men are built for the living life single. Y'all aren't. Get away from your aunties, your na na. Get away from them women who are on the who are in no man's land who are not the women who are in the danger zone. Women who in the danger zone, you

know, 27 to 35, they could go either way. >> DANGER ZONE. >> 27 to 35, they could go either way. That the pressure is on them. But they could go either way. They can be safe.

The women on the other side of 35, 36 to 60, no man's land. That's where the women who tend to be in a bad mood. Those are the women who tend to be a girl, you don't need to know. You go get a job. You don't need no man. You don't know them. That's where you get all big mama them and na na and auntie them and nicknam giving you all advice, telling you, "Yeah, girl, eat the extra Ho Ho, extra Ding Dong. Yeah, girl, you look good with some weight. You need to put some weight on you. You look skinny over there. You look anorexic." They keep piling Popeyes on you 'cause they want you to get big and swole like them so you can be over there with them going to church, sitting on the front row with necks looking like a pack of hot dogs with that church hat on, face beat to the god, smelling good, but you know you're not comfortable. Church suit all tight, not enjoying life. They're not enjoying life.

So when somebody like myself comes along and says, "You need to drop the weight, get fit," ah, you need to do nothing for no man. Okay? Any woman that tells you you don't need to do nothing for a man, run from her. Yes, you need to do a lot for men because you expect men to do a lot for you. And that's one of the biggest disconnects. We have so many women today thinking that they are this, and you're not. Thinking you're settling. A woman, a baby mama thinking she's settling, an average-looking or cute baby mama thinking she's settling for an average middle-class man. Whoa. So, she'll stay in an apartment or a townhome or a small house, and the men will stay this way. And this is why black men and black women will continue to give money away to the economy. You want to have a black man, black woman get together, marry, buy a home, get some property, insurance policy, such and so forth, pass that on to that kid, and pass on. See, it's all about what can I get out of my life. Ain't nobody worried about the next generation. I get it. You want to have life. You want to live life. A lot of you feel like life was, you were lied to or you were deceived. Life ain't over, but you got to get real about where you are. And so many women today are delusional. Men cannot afford to be delusional because we get level set every day. You go out and try to shoot your shot at somebody who's outside your league, you'll find out where you are. I'm not saying this to be mean. But I'm going to tell you, women in general, black women in particular, thank you for coming over here to at least listen. Stop listening to all these snowflake feminine channels who tell you, "Oh, he's so mean. He's so this and he's so that. He's so toxic. He's so..." Okay, sure. Where are the men in their audiences? Forget me. Where are the men, the high-value men in their audiences? Where are the long-term relationships coming as a result of their platforms? Where are the marriages coming as a result of their teachings and what they're pushing? Because if they're still teaching and pushing that stuff, that it's always over there, it's always the men and never the woman in the mirror. You never have to do anything. It's always, "Oh, it's always an understanding." See, the world doesn't look at it that way. The world is very cut and dry. The world may not say it back to you, but it sure treats you, but it sure treats you like it did. The world may not say, "Oh, you need to lose this or do that or such and so forth," but it treats you like it said it out loud.

All right, let's really unpack this one because this conversation went way beyond dating. This was really about accountability, consequences, and the modern habit of trying to spiritually rebrand bad decisions instead of honestly confronting them. And Kevin saw that immediately. The first caller was only 22 years old with a 1-year-old daughter, and you could tell she was still trying to process the reality of her situation in real time. She admitted she understood the importance of two-parent households. She admitted she knew single motherhood would make life harder. She admitted the father was not marriage material. But even with all that awareness, she still carried the pregnancy to term and expected life to somehow work itself out afterward. That's the part people struggle hearing because modern culture keeps telling women that motherhood automatically makes them more valuable, more mature, and more desirable while completely ignoring how men actually evaluate long-term relationships. And Kevin kept bringing the conversation back to one thing over and over again: options. Men with options do not think emotionally first. They think practically. They look at baggage, obligations, stress, financial responsibility, family dynamics, and long-term risk. And whether people like it or not, another man's child immediately changes the equation for most men, especially men with money, status, and access to women without children. That's why Kevin kept saying, "High men are not lining up to become stepfathers." And people can call that harsh, but pretending reality works differently helps nobody.

Another thing that stood out was how quickly the first caller shifted toward hypergamy even after admitting her situation. She still wanted a man making enough money so she wouldn't have to work heavily after having more children. That's important because it shows how deeply modern expectations are ingrained now. Even women who openly acknowledge mistakes still often believe they deserve elite-level outcomes afterward. And Kevin kept trying to explain that life doesn't work like a reset button. Choices matter. Timing matters. Family structure matters. The second caller was interesting for a completely different reason. She genuinely believed God blessed her with a high-value boyfriend despite her being a single mother. And Kevin didn't even fully reject that possibility. What he challenged was the mindset other women would take from hearing it. Because people hear rare exceptions and immediately turn them into universal rules. That's dangerous. If one person wins the lottery, you don't build your financial strategy around lottery tickets. And Kevin kept trying to explain that if her situation truly works out, then the lesson should not be, "See, it all works out anyway." The lesson should be, "Don't repeat the decisions that made life harder in the first place." That was the deeper point most people missed.

Then the conversation took another turn when the younger caller started talking about waiting on God to send her a husband while simultaneously admitting she was not even prepared to be a wife yet. And honestly, Kevin's response there was one of the most important parts of the entire episode because too many people today think faith replaces effort, discipline, preparation, and self-awareness. It doesn't. Faith without action becomes fantasy. You cannot demand elite outcomes while ignoring the habits, discipline, self-improvement, and positioning required to realistically achieve them. And Kevin kept hammering that point home all throughout the show. Another thing people are probably going to overlook is how often Kevin tied all of this back to older women giving younger women terrible advice. The "you don't need a man" mentality, the "live your life first" mentality, the "there's always time later" mentality. And then years later, many of those same women end up lonely, bitter, unhealthy, financially stressed, or stuck trying to convince younger women to repeat the same path. That's the cycle Kevin was really talking about. At the end of the day, this conversation wasn't about hating women or attacking single mothers. It was about understanding that actions create outcomes whether emotions agree with them or not. And no amount of spirituality changes cause and effect. That's the real message here. Anyway, y'all already know this comment section is about to be insane. Drop your thoughts. Like the video, subscribe, stay locked in. We keeping it real over here. I'll catch you in the next one.

Tonight's caller is 28 years old, confident, ambitious, and convinced she can have it all. She says she wants a man who can make over $400,000 a year, pay all the bills, support the lifestyle she wants, and still allow her to pursue her own media career and personal ambitions. On paper, it sounds like the modern dream: career, family, financial security, independence, and a high-earning husband. But once Kevin starts asking the real questions about math percentages, what those men actually want, and the realities of the dating market, the conversation quickly shifts.

>> Price too high?

>> No, I don't feel like it's too high at all.

>> Okay. Uh, what do you want?

>> Um, you know, I feel like I watch you and I listen to everything that you say and I mean, I want a man that's definitely going to be able to pay the bills, like take care of me. Um, but I still want to be able to have the option to work and do like my career, have a career, and still have kids.

>> How many children do you want?

>> Two.

>> Okay. So, you want it all?

>> Yeah. Yeah.

>> Where, where do you live?

>> I'm in North Georgia, like Winnett.

>> Okay. Well, are you currently seeing somebody right now that can pay your bills?

>> No, not at the moment.

>> When was the last relationship you had?

>> My last relationship was about three years ago. I was with him for six years.

>> And why didn't you guys get married for six years?

>> Um, I met him in college and that was my first boyfriend. And so yeah, I think we just went through a lot and um by the time we got to the end where we could possibly make something work, it just did not work.

>> Okay. How much money is a man going to need to make to be able to pay all the bills for a family of four in Atlanta?

>> In Atlanta?

>> Um, probably well over 400k.

>> Uh-huh.

>> And do you care if he's black or not?

>> No.

>> Yeah. Well, he will. The more money men tend to make, the more racially loyal they tend to be.

>> Okay.

>> What percentage of men in this country make $400,000 or more?

>> Probably like...

>> She throws on me.

>> What percentage of men in this country make over $400,000?

>> Um, I would say maybe two to 4%. Probably not a lot.

>> One.

>> Okay.

>> 1%. So, let's go back to what you said. I feel...

>> Which is kryptonite.

>> Men don't care about what you feel. We we think, act, and do.

>> You want it all...

>> At 28 years old with no man in the pipeline...

>> And you want a top 1% man. What does he want? What is a man who's making the kind of money you're talking about making, what do those men typically want from a woman?

>> Um, youth, the beauty...

>> It's probably it. Come. Um, I wouldn't say submission.

>> Is that the TV or something?

>> Yeah, probably is. I teach. Yeah.

>> No, the number one thing that men like that tend to want is cooperation.

>> Mhm.

>> And a man is making $400,000 a year. At what age do you think men make that legally?

>> Uh, well over 35.

>> Well over 35. Men hit that financial stride between 45 and 55.

>> Are you prepared to marry a man that's 45 years old or older?

>> No.

>> So you're a delusional black woman. You don't have any of this in your life. You don't have it in the pipeline.

>> And not only do you want a man who's in the top 1%, you want him to be closer to your age. And then you want him to want what you want them to want,

>> right?

>> So, if this was just a math problem, it seems to me that you don't know these men.

>> Well, I feel like I date men that um are ambitious, maybe more so in my age, and then I've started to recently date a lot older men. But you need to skip past the question. I... You don't know these men?

>> No, I don't know those men that make 500K. No.

>> Do you don't even know what they typically want? They typically want a traditional wife.

>> Which means your career, due respect, why do you need it if you're not paying any bills?

>> I mean, I still want my own sense of like being of who I am.

>> By a dog.

>> See, careers are for outcomes.

>> Mhm.

>> So, you want it to look like I got my own sense. Your sense can be to be a wife to a productive, competitive, successful man and a successful mother to two children. Why is that not enough? Why can I not have my career and have my kids in my house?

>> Because you're not qualified.

>> What makes me unqualified?

>> You don't know these men. You don't even know what they want. They don't want what you want traditionally.

>> Mhm.

>> You can want it, but this is where it comes right down to what makes you not qualified. When these, when I talk to these men, they don't want modern women. Again, you want your husband to be making $400 plus thousand dollars. Who's going to raise your children while you... What is your career?

>> Uh, media correspondent.

>> Okay. So, um, when you are off on site, where are the children going to be?

>> Uh, daycare.

>> So, somebody else is going to be raising his legacy.

>> No, then he might as well marry the nanny. See, this is this modern power couple. No, the most men don't work 70, 80, 100 hours for 20 plus years to go marry a woman to just carry their children to allow a stranger to raise them.

>> Right.

>> So, father married. Are your mother and father married?

>> Yes, they are.

>> Okay. Um, was your father the majority breadwinner?

>> Mhm.

>> What did your mother do?

>> Um, she does admin stuff, but both. Well, my mom is, they're both from Jamaica, so coming over here, she used to do um Coventry Healthcare, so she used to do clerical stuff for them.

>> Okay. But your mother worked outside the house.

>> Mhm.

>> All right. Do you have much respect for housewives?

>> I do. It's a full-time job. I have close friends that are doing that.

>> Okay. But the kind of men you're talking about would want a housewife...

>> More often than not.

>> And if we're honest, where, what is the high, what is the level you at the end of your career, where would you like it to be?

>> Um, my goal right now is to be like a Genie Mai. I want to be a personality that people come and listen to my opinions.

>> And Genie Mai on talk shows?

>> Yes.

>> Do you know about how her first marriage turned out?

>> I did. I do.

>> Is she talking anything like you now?

>> Not now. No.

>> Exactly. 'Cause it doesn't work.

>> But she's still able to have a relationship and be a media correspondent. Uh, ma'am, she's talking nothing like you're talking now.

>> Nothing. See...

>> Your priority, and you're free to choose. It is your, your, your media is going to be more important than your man and your family.

>> I don't know any men who actually have made themselves the kind of man you're talking about who are not going. They're number one. Their purpose is number two. You're number three. This is, you're looking basically, you'll be look, the kind of man you're looking for would drive you up a wall. A beta male provide, a beta male would allow a woman to be on top or be equal and he's making all that money. Um, I think you, I think you kind of, I think you may have kind of figured what I was going to say.

>> Yeah. But what makes you special where you can get this?

>> Well, I just, I mean, I've listened to a lot of your things that you say and you say that these men look for women that are attractive, take care of themselves, and are submissive and I feel like I do hold a lot of those characteristics.

>> Okay, there and there are thousands of you,

>> right?

>> So, you're attractive, granted. Take care of yourself, granted. There are also women who were raised to be first ladies, wives, not wanting to challenge. You want, you want equality.

>> You want your own identity.

>> Then go work for your, then marry, then your, your man is the institution because you got to understand if you have, and let's say you and I were married...

>> And I'm making millions and you're making what?

>> I would assume just as close to that.

>> No, no, no. Media correspondent from whom? Depends on where I landed,

>> right?

>> Uh, for every Genie Mai, come on. I, most of the journalists that I knew in school, they had to work free internships. Journalists are some of the brokest people in the world.

>> Oh, I know.

>> So, let's not cap.

>> Okay.

>> You're talking about trying to be in the top one-tenth of the 1%. Most journalists are broke as French toast.

>> So, earning what? Before your big break?

>> Before my big break, I would say probably 50.

>> 50, baby girl. That's a, that's the kind of man. 50 to a man is making 400.

>> Mhm.

>> That's, that's less, that's just over 10% of what he's making. It will cost more to hire the nannies. New child infant care is $2,000 a month. So if you had a one and a three-year-old, you're looking at $3,000.

>> So my question, Kevin, though, is so, 'cause I've had a fork in the road where it's, I either need to pick my career or pick whether I want to...

>> Be a housewife?

>> Right. So, it's getting into the rooms of being in or being into the face of the men that I want to be in front of.

>> Uh-huh.

>> Right. And um, I don't know how to kind of articulate what I'm trying to say, but it's more so like I've been in front of men that make a lot of money.

>> Uh-huh.

>> And I feel like I could still do both at the same time.

>> Well, that's what...

>> Until I have kids.

>> That's what you feel. And see, and I'll be, I'm going to just be dead honest with you.

>> Mhm.

>> The leverage is on this side,

>> right?

>> Not yours. Both men will date you. Both men will sleep with you. Only neither will marry you. That's just what it comes down to. Neither will marry you. So what it is, is what we haven't got to. You're coming from a place of, you're projecting fear, scarcity, and lack. That's why you need to have your career and everything else because what if my marriage doesn't work? What if this? What if that? What if I get lost doing all sort of stuff? So really, a man at this level would just be hiring you for your DNA. He'd be hiring you to impregnate you, for you to carry the child, to make the child, and then someone else would go raise that child while you're off being a media correspondent, fulfilling your purpose and dream. That's not what these men typically want. But let's be honest. Do you really think that? Are you really coming from a place where you think your marriage is going to last for 40, 50 years?

>> Yeah, I truly do.

>> Okay. Then who, then why would you want someone else to raise your children?

>> I think I've seen my mom do both. So, I'm assuming I can also accomplish that.

>> How many children does your mom have?

>> Just me.

>> There we go. Ding ding ding ding. Only child syndrome.

>> No, baby girl.

>> Okay.

>> No. I mean, yes. You're, I mean, you're an attractive woman, but that ain't enough.

>> I mean, and, and what you're telling me, ma'am, if, if I put you in a room with these men, you, you fast realize how out of step with your competition you really are, just by the femininity these ladies exude,

>> their willingness to be the first lady

>> versus you would more likely be over in the conversation with the men wanting to exchange opinions.

>> Yes.

>> Yeah, that would make great sex, but no thank you. So...

>> You have to ask yourself a question. What's, if that's most important to you, then you're talking about a completely different kind of man.

>> Mhm.

>> You're talking about a man who's making closer to 50, $70,000 a year if you're fortunate.

>> Mhm.

>> Could you respect the man making that kind of money?

>> Mhm.

>> 'Cause but you're also talking about a quality of life to where you making 50, he's making 70. Y'all living in a, y'all not living in Buckhead. You're not driving BMWs. You're driving Honda Civics. Michael, you're not going to air and Dior. Don't be going over shops at Buckhead. Yeah. Every now and then y'all may be able to go to Papao on your, on your anniversary or something,

>> right?

>> Can you really live that life?

>> Uh, I don't think so.

>> Exactly. I'm looking at you now. So, the thing is, man, I feel so sorry for so many of our young sisters because you all want this inflated lifestyle.

>> And that's fine to want it, but the kind of man you wouldn't want to date a man that's 45. Well, then who else is going to make the money? An athlete, entertainer, or a musician or a D boy. Um...

>> What this shows more than anything else is...

>> Men and women focus so much on who they are. And the, and the world has let you guys do this on what you want to where you've had to focus nothing on who the men actually are, what the men actually want. So you don't mean to, but you're really dissing a whole group of men by picilizing this group of men, but you're not even giving these men what they want.

>> Right.

>> And sadly, so many of our sisters are stuck in this position because of the ego and the pride that comes along with what you're talking about. It's not as though, yes, there are women who can do both, but Jenny Mai has no children.

>> Yeah.

>> And her first marriage failed miserably because she didn't want kids and he did. He went off and got married and had kids.

>> So, and then complicate this for being an only child kind of thing.

>> Lot of moving parts there, man. A lot of moving parts.

>> Okay.

>> I think you need, I think you need, I think you need to take some real time to figure out really what you need, not what you want.

>> Okay.

>> What you want may be one thing,

>> but what do you need? Because if your people, your family are from Jamaica, I mean, it ain't like you grew up with a silver spoon in your mouth.

>> So why are you so bougie now?

>> Uh, you just, you know, as I've gotten older, I've learned to spoil myself. So...

>> On whose money?

>> My own money.

>> Making $50,000 here. I mean, I have so, during the day I still work in real estate and then of course as a media correspondent I have to pick up my gigs on the weekends.

>> Okay.

>> But it's still nets to a certain amount of money,

>> right?

>> How you, how you spoiling yourself without the money?

>> Mhm.

>> I'mma spoil myself. Does that mean you roll up into Cartier and it is what it is? Like, can you do that at 28 on your income?

>> No.

>> Then you can't spoil yourself, baby girl. But you, but see the confidence in which so many young professional sisters talk is like, well, this is just a, like I mean, it's almost like you're coming off as though, I don't want to use the word an impostor, but it's like, what are you talking about?

>> Mhm.

>> I mean, I don't want to get too deep into how much you make, but 28, a media correspondent, you're making, I would assume you're between 40 and 75. And that's being generous.

>> Mhm.

>> And that's with all your gigs and everything else,

>> right?

>> That's a nice apartment and a car note. That's being able to go to La Bou every now and then, but really men that you date will probably pick up the slack, but that's fine. They're going to want something for that.

>> So, if you end up being closer to the norm for media correspondents, closer to the median income, not the Genie Mai's, because you know that's the far exception,

>> right?

>> And you look at everybody on their panel, Lonnie Love does not look like one of the happiest people in the world. And she got a broken painter. Uh, but and Lonnie, you know, you talk a lot of [ __ ] about black men. So you got it coming. Uh, and you got a re, a reformed Jeezy. Uh, but if you stick closer to what most people make, that means you're not going to be making over six figures. Do you really want to go the rest of your life because you need to be independent in your sense of self to where you end up 50 years old with a middle career as a correspondent news here, this, such and so forth? I mean, you, you're doing okay.

>> Mhm.

>> But you can't travel and go to Paris and it's not on your own money,

>> right?

>> What does that look like after you're no longer able to sit in the anchor chair or you know, you no longer have this youthful view, they bring in the next group of women. What does that look like? 'Cause then you can't turn around and try to be like, "Well, now I'm already get married." No, no, no, no. You, you...

>> Too old.

>> Yeah.

>> You're in the danger zone for a reason. This is the age where you ladies really have to make up your mind. Either I'm going to couple with a man of value and I'm going to figure something out, or I'm going to go this life by myself and I'm going to take whatever it gives me. And this path is not one I recommend because it's highly competitive and no, and no one's going to give you anything. And this path tends to end up in a lot of loneliness. Um, so unless you know you are 100% willing to commit and that means cutting off marriage and kids and all the other stuff because to make this work, you can't serve two masters. You got to pick a side,

>> right?

>> I hate to break it that way, but just think about it. Just think about it, but you can't have everything.

>> Can't have it all.

>> And you want, and you want it all plus some. Plus some, plus some.

>> I tried it. I tried it.

>> All right, have a good day. Bye. Bye bye.

All right, so let's slow this down for a second and really think about what we just watched. This conversation wasn't really about one woman. It's about a mindset that a lot of people have today. The idea that you can design the perfect life on paper, the perfect partner, the perfect income, the perfect career, the perfect family, and somehow everything is supposed to line up exactly the way you imagined it. But the world doesn't work like that. Relationships don't work like that. And markets, whether we're talking about jobs, houses, or dating, definitely don't work like that. What Kevin was trying to show her wasn't cruelty. It was math. When you start asking for the top 1% of anything, you're no longer talking about normal expectations. You're talking about extreme rarity. And when something is that rare, it comes with trade-offs. Those men have options. A lot of options. And because they have options, they get to choose the lifestyle that fits them, not the other way around. And that's the part people struggle with the most. Everyone wants the outcome, the house, the lifestyle, the security, the success. But very few people want to accept the conditions that come with it, the sacrifices, the compromises, the priorities that have to come first. You can want a high-powered career. You can want a family. You can want a high-earning partner. But the hard truth Kevin keeps coming back to is this: Sometimes you have to decide which one matters the most because trying to hold on to all of them at the same time can leave you with none. And that's the deeper message behind conversations like this. It's not about telling people they can't dream big. It's about understanding how the real world works, how people choose partners, and what actually leads to long-term stability. Because time moves forward whether we plan for it or not. And the earlier someone understands the trade-offs in life, the better chance they have of building something that actually lasts. Anyway, that's the conversation. If you got something out of it, drop your thoughts in the comments. I want to know what you think. Was Kevin being realistic, or do you think she should still chase the life she described? Make sure you hit like, subscribe, and turn on notifications so you don't miss the next breakdown. And as always, go support Kevin Samuels's original content to keep his legacy alive. I'll see you in the next one.

Welcome back to my channel. Today's caller is 26 years old, divorced, a single mother, and says she's attractive, has standards, and is ready for a high-value man. She believes the only thing standing in her way is figuring out what she's doing wrong. But once Kevin starts asking real questions, it becomes clear this isn't about standards, it's about reality. Because on the surface, it sounds simple. She wants a provider, wants to stay home, wants multiple kids, and wants a certain lifestyle.

Um, so I'm calling just um to see like, I guess what I am doing and what I can avoid because I don't know if me having standards is getting in the way of finding the man that I want.

>> Uh, so let me go ahead and see if I can repeat the question. You want to know if you having standards is preventing you from getting the man you want.

>> Yes.

>> Okay. So, let me start with some background. How old are you?

>> I'm 26.

>> Oh, you heard me say it in the in the chat room. Did you go to college?

>> I did.

>> But you didn't graduate?

>> No, I just got my um associate of arts.

>> Okay, cool. Height, weight, and dress size.

>> Um, so I'm like 5'5, 5'6, and my weight is 128 to 130.

>> Okay.

>> Depends.

>> What dress size do you wear?

>> Like a four.

>> Uh, and, and lastly, um, what, what part of the country are you in? Nor, east, south, west? Like um, like West Coast.

>> West Coast. Okay. And what kind of man do you want?

>> Well, I like black men. Like that's like my first choice, but I'm like, I don't mind swirling.

>> Okay. I'm talking about from a, from a on paper standpoint. What kind of money we talking about?

>> Oh, like success. Like successful. Like I'm not really...

>> Let's define successful. Do you want to be a stay-at-home wife?

>> Yes, I do.

>> Okay. And do you want to have, how many children are you planning on having for this guy?

>> Um, just depends on how many he would want from you.

>> Uh, three.

>> Okay.

>> I mean, if you ain't got no, you got nothing else to do except stay at home. 26, right? One kid, you, one kid, you'd be getting off pretty damn easy.

>> Wouldn't you agree or would not? Tell me. What do you think?

>> No, I think that's true. I think, you know...

>> Okay.

>> The average family has 2.3 kids or 2.5 kids, but you talk about a successful guy. So, a successful guy, are you in uh Northern California or Southern California?

>> Um, Northern. So, in Northern California, um, so to be a stay-at-home wife of three children in Northern California, how much do you think, uh, a man would need to make annually to make that happen? For you to have a decent home, have your own four-door sedan, uh, to have the kids college paid for, private school if necessary, or high-end public school, you know, with kids' activities, uh, kids having cars at 16, having their college paid for if necessary, plus have the things of life, 401k, retirement, everything else. Still being able to eat well, travel, you know, not just go to Disneyland. I'm quite sure you want to go out of the country, maybe go to Europe on a family vacation, that kind of stuff. Right.

>> Right.

>> Right. Okay. How much you think that person needs to make, that man needs to make annually?

>> Um, I would say a significant amount.

>> Give me a dollar. Give me a dollar value.

>> I'm not good at math. Like probably like um over a h... 100,000 maybe. I don't know. Maybe like 80,000, 90,000, over 100,000. I'm not really sure.

>> $100,000 a year for five people in Northern California.

>> I know. Oh, man. Okay. So, I don't know.

>> Okay. So, problem number one, the things you want, you don't even know what it takes from a dollar standpoint to make it possible for a man to make it possible for you. You think this [ __ ] just is magic? Let me give you the number. The number they throw this six-figure number out, that's enough for one person to be successful. Roughly a hundred, roughly $10,000 a month. That's a number I tend to use. That's in Dallas, Houston, Austin. If you adjust that for the Bay Area, you're $100,000 a year, you're still broke. You're talking about closer to 220, 250. There's a police officer in San Jose who made 225, $250,000 last year, and he's a cop. Okay? So, the kind of man you're talking about, he's going to need to be making around 700 to $900,000 a year.

>> I'm open to relocating. Like, I don't have to stay. Like, I'm, I'm like so open to moving somewhere.

>> Well, do you think people make that kind of money in Cedar Rapids, Idaho, Iowa?

>> No.

>> Do you think there are a lot of black men? Black men are concentrated in 10 cities. See, this is part of the problem with young lady with ladies. You want this fantasy of a man, not a fantasy. You want this high, high-value man. These men, listen, these men are, are concentrated in 10 cities. Black people are concentrated in 10 cities. Okay? And I don't, I don't fault you for wanting him, but I just say you got to understand where he is. And to, to, to, and to think a guy can make $80,000 and you would be happy with that kind of money. You'd be working on 80 grand and then there'd be tension in the marriage. I forgot to ask you one question. On a scale from 1 to 10, where would most people say you rank as far as a beauty facial? From a facial standpoint...

>> Like a nine or a 10. Maybe an eight. If someone's hating on me.

>> A nine or a 10. Okay. So, we're talking LA nine or just...

>> I just know I'm very beautiful and I'm not just saying that. But I don't know.

>> Hey, sis. I give it to you. So, you, these are good things. So, from a, from a, from a money standpoint, uh, the kind of money you're talking about is a guy who's going to, he's going to have to have a serious high-earning career or he's going to have to be a small business owner and own a, a significant concern. Um, that means you're going to be looking at men who are at least about 10, probably 15 years older than you.

>> Oh, definitely.

>> Okay. And, and that's, that's what you're going to be looking for. But the question is, what do those kind of men want in a wife?

>> Um, well, I would, I just, I know that they want, you know, someone who's just a lady. I would hope so because I'm really open to just being a lovely housewife and just doing what I need to do.

>> Translation, I'm, I'm open to you taking care of me. That's what you just said. I'm open to just being a, I'm open to you just taking care of me, which is cool. But what you've also said is you've done no homework or no research or no nothing on what it is you want. That's why you're not getting it.

>> That's so, that's that's like golden. That's true.

>> This is why this is why your non-black counterparts, your white counterparts steal black men like this out from under you because one, you don't even know how to identify them. Two, when they're there, you got no sales pitch. It's just, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm pretty good. Okay, you're beautiful. You're, you're 5 foot whatever, your dress size four. You are smoking. After we have sex, what else? Depth. Um, you know, I don't, I don't flaunt my, my things that I know or my experiences, but I'm a deep person and I can hold a conversation and...

>> Like I make a lovely housewife, good mom, things like that.

>> Were you, were your parents, were your mother, was your mother and father married?

>> Uh, no. Well, yeah. My background is crazy. But...

>> I am divorced.

>> Let me, let me ask, let me, let me simplify the question. Were you raised to be a housewife?

>> No, I wasn't actually.

>> So, how can you talk about you're a lovely housewife?

>> Because I was married before and I saw what didn't work and I was like, that's why I don't want to do. I don't want to go to work. I want to focus on...

>> Okay, let's back up. See, that, that was that was an important part. You were married before. How old was your husband?

>> He's like 29 or something.

>> How old were you?

>> I got married when I was like 18 or 19.

>> And where's your father?

>> I didn't grow up with a father.

>> I, I didn't say that. I asked where is he?

>> Um, I don't have a very strong relationship with him. Why?

>> Um, because I was adopted.

>> Okay. Do you know your biological mother?

>> I do. Yes.

>> But you don't know your biological father?

>> I do, but he's um recently like got sick and he's in the hospital. Like he's like I just...

>> Okay, I'm going to ask you a hard question. Are you ready?

>> Sure.

>> Do you know his side of the story from his mouth?

>> Um, no, not really.

>> Then why in the hell are you judging him?

>> I'm not.

>> Well, but you know your biological mother. No, you're not judging him. What? I asked you, where's your father? I didn't grow up with a father. I didn't ask. I said, where is he? Well, he wasn't in my life. I was adopted. Okay. But you know your biological mother. See, when I ask you about the woman that rap, the woman that birthed you, you could answer those questions. But about your father, it's all this vague stuff. And my question is, why have you never sought to understand your father?

>> Well, he was the reason why I was adopted was because of...

>> Nobody knows you, sweetheart. I don't know you.

>> Abuse, sexual abuse that was going on. I had six sis, I have five other biological sisters and we all got put in the system because he was sexually abusing my sisters and that's why we got...

>> Well, then that's cause, then that's cause, that's different. That's, that's very, that's one of the few things I will accept if there was actually a reason why you should, a safety reason, then there's no reason to interact with this person. But I would say let's move on past that if there was reason because I don't want to dig too deep into because they're not relevant. If there's a reason, there's a reason. But you were adopted.

>> Yeah.

>> And you were raised by a, a mother and father or a mother?

>> Just a mother.

>> All right. So, you're raised by a mother and, and the reason I'm asking these questions, if you got married at 18 to a 29-year-old, who, who, who advised you on that? That's what I'm trying to get to.

>> Nobody.

>> Okay. Um, all right. Why, where's, whose advice do you seek in trying to guide you through life?

>> I don't, I'm just kind of, I guess learning through trial and error.

>> That's very dangerous.

>> Well, that's why I'm calling you.

>> Well, but you, but you, you're calling me, but you're not paying me. See, this is why I'm not going to give you this off. I don't, I mean, your circumstances, try, try as they are. You're a 26-year-old. You're not 14. You know your background. You know it's troubled. Are you seeing a therapist?

>> I've done a lot of work.

>> Okay. Is it...

>> I'm done a lot of work.

>> Are you in a healthy place?

>> I, I am actually.

>> All right. So, and you said you were married to a 29-year-old. How long were you married?

>> Like five years.

>> So, you've been divorced less than, less than three years.

>> Yeah.

>> Okay. Any children?

>> When, a boy or girl?

>> He's a boy.

>> Okay. Um, you're going to have a lot of problems.

>> Really?

>> Yes.

>> Oh, gosh.

>> Yes.

>> No.

>> I don't care how attractive you are. Your, your background, ma'am, is messy.

>> What if I don't tell anybody, though?

>> People aren't stupid, especially the kind of man you're talking about. You want. And it makes you a horrible person. See, a person who's gone through therapy would not say that. A person who's in a healthy mind space would not think to try to deceive somebody.

>> Well, just, I mean, no one wants to know your whole life story, though. Like...

>> We're talking. No, we're talking about people who. No, ma'am. The only people we've been talking about is the kind of men that could provide for you and put you in a home and take care of you. But the re, the real answer is yes, my background is messy. No, the work's not done, but I want what I want. So yeah, I would say the work's not done because that's not a, that's not a healthy thing to say. That's a, that's a predatory thing to say regarding another person. I'll just lie to him about my background. You going to lie to him about your kid, too?

>> No, I was just saying like, just don't put all on the table like...

>> Well, you mean about, put it on the table on the first date? But it has to come out.

>> See, you are who you are. You are who you are.

>> And the kind of men you're talking about did not get there by luck. High-earning men, wealthy men, successful men didn't get there by luck. See, that's why I started at the beginning. Do you even know how much money it would take and you don't? Which is kind of troubling because I wonder how you're even living with a child. I mean, are you, you got an ass, you got two years of college and an associate's degree?

>> Mhm.

>> How are you living in California?

>> Well, I mean, technically I'm, I just, I'm technically not. I just didn't want to put like my, where I am. So, you know...

>> I don't, but, but I mean, are living, do you, are you in your own place?

>> I am. Yes.

>> Are you paying the rent there in full yourself?

>> Yes, I am.

>> All right. And is your son provided for?

>> Yes.

>> All right. Is, and is the father in the kid's life?

>> Yes.

>> All right. Are you getting alimony or just child support?

>> Child support.

>> All right. So, all that is a mess. Your child is young. There's not enough hotness to overcome young child from a divorce with your background. There, there are other women who are as hot or hotter than you that have none of that.

>> That's number one. Number two, there are other women out there who were raised to be a wife who have none of that. Number three, there are other women out there who at least understand what the man on the side of the table that you want to come take care of you and another man's child would have to do to make that happen. In effect, you want a fairy godfather, what you want.

>> Okay? You don't like the words, but that's really what it is because none, because you don't know who he is. He's just a genie. What do you do for a living?

>> I'm a receptionist and I do nails on the side.

>> So...

>> Um, you ready for this?

>> Um, I don't know. I, sure. Sure. I mean...

>> Well, the receptionist, receptionist, receptionist and nails on the side. That's not enough to even provide for one person in California if that's where you live.

>> Mhm.

>> You have a child.

>> Mhm.

>> It means you can't take care of yourself.

>> Okay.

Is that? I mean, I, I do, but okay. Okay. How can you do you make enough money to take care of yourself without the child support?

Yes, I do.

Okay. Well, where do you live? Because this makes no sense. But go ahead.

Well, I don't want to give up my location.

I don't care, ma'am. What do you think? I've got. Why do? Why? Why? You called into. Hold on. You called. Hold on. Let's understand. You called into my show. Ask me questions that you're not paying for. Don't play with me.

I don't have. I don't have no need to know who you are or where you're at. It's not that serious.

But what I'm trying to understand is whether or not you're telling me the truth. And there's these holes in this story. Are you in the Bay Area? That's all I need to know.

No, I'm not. I'm in a small, small town.

All right, but it's still Northern California.

No, it's not California. I just threw that out there. Like, I just.

All right. So, you're [ __ ] lying to me.

I'm not lying to you. Like, I.

All right. You have one chance. You have one chance to go ahead and tell me where you are. I don't play games, man. Don't do this. I'm not. I'm not playing games with you. Tell me where you are, the area, or get off my [ __ ] phone. Seriously. Damn. You too old to be doing this stuff. You want my help? Let me help you. If not, go figure it out yourself.

Washington State.

See, you know why that's important? What I just said, ma'am?

Why?

Your. When I said your, your background is a mess and you said, "Why don't I just not tell him?" You are willing to lie to a man to get what you want. You just proved it with me. I'm better at it than most men and I'm dogged about it and I can smell [ __ ]. But you are willing to lie to someone to get what you want. And I don't care where you live in Washington State. High earning women are not receptionists and nail techs. Those are women that live around the poverty level. The only way people tend to make live. I mean, you're not making $40 an hour as a receptionist, right? So, that means in order to take care of a small child, you're having to either get significant child support or some sort of assistance, or you must be living in a hovel somewhere. Either or you're living paycheck to paycheck without a without the government or a man supporting you.

Yeah, I do. Like I said, I do nails on this side.

Right. So, is his. What is his father?

His father is gainfully employed. Your ex-husband gainfully employed.

Mhm.

What does he do for a career?

He's a police officer. How come I? I that was going to be my guess. That was going to be my. I'll tell you guys why I knew that. I'll tell you guys why I knew that later. Um, why didn't he have custody of the boy?

Um, because I do. Oh, we were. We. He was in the military when we got married and we moved to his hometown, which was not in Washington State.

I don't care. I asked you what he makes more money than you. Why didn't he have? Why didn't he have the boy?

Um, because he wasn't a police officer when we got divorced.

But he is now and he makes more money than you and he has benefits. Why doesn't he have the boy?

Um, because he has two other children.

What the [ __ ]? What does that have to do with anything? Why doesn't he have his son? He's the more stable. He has benefits.

It would make it easier for you to get what you want.

Yeah, but I just. I guess I just like being a mother.

No, that's not it. He's a check. You may love being a mother, but you cannot raise a man. You never even saw a man. You obviously don't. Hold on. You obviously don't. Pick. Well, you have not made the best choices for your life. And you think you're going to be able to help a boy become a man. And you're the only one leading you. No one else is leading you. Ma'am, you. This is problematic at best. Boys need their fathers, but as a woman who did not have a father, it doesn't surprise me that you just think guys are just genies. And no disrespect, but I feel like I'm talking to like a teenager at some levels. So, I'm going to tell you, the boy would be better off with this father. I don't know why the man didn't petition for custody of his child because you can't care for him. You're a nail technician, uh, and a receptionist. It will be better for you to give the son over to his father and you pay child support and let him be raised by a man who has a career and benefits. You get yourself together and give yourself the best shot to date because high value men, men with money, you'll be a side chick. They will have sex with you. They'll tell you things, but ma'am, you are a bad investment. Just from a practical standpoint, the fact that you have a child and all these other loose ends. And then you mix in the if the abuse thing is real, which I don't have any reason to doubt, but the deception you've played around here is how you move through the world. Men aren't suckers, man. Especially successful ones.

Last question about your son. If this is how you think about men, what do you think that's going to do to his? What his view of manhood?

If what is how I think about men?

Well, you've not really said anything positive about us. I mean, you you want to lie to us.

Positive.

Yeah. Do you mean you? It's not come across as a as a positive situation. I mean, you were married. Um, do you think you're the best. If you do you think he's going to become a better man under you than under his father?

My son.

Uhhuh.

I think so. I really do. I do. I I try to give myself.

Do you know this? Do. But you do you know the data on the matter? The data. I mean, I understand that, you know, this just single moms in general is not ideal.

No, it's not. It's beyond not ideal. Um, I'm assuming you're. You're black.

Mhm.

Is his father black?

I'm sorry. What is?

His father black?

Yes.

Okay. Go look up the statistic for single mother raised black boys.

I will do that.

Uh.

Well, all you have to do, you don't have to go that far. I'll tell you, they are at the bottom of the barrel reading at a fourth grade level. Single mother raised black boys are in some of the most precarious positions of any person on this planet. And man, with respect, you have two years of college and just a a job and he would be in a better position. Is his father active in his life? Like, does he see him every other weekend? I mean, is he or do you just have custody and he's getting? You just have full custody and you getting a check?

No, we do like. Um, like he has visitation because we don't live in the same state.

Right.

So, you know, it's like the holiday thing, summer.

But you lived in the same state when you were married.

Yeah.

Why'd you move? Why'd you move away from the father?

I didn't want to, but it was because my family. Uh, uh.

Let's stop right there, man. Let's stop right there. You were a wife. I don't want to hear [ __ ] about her family. Your family is now your husband and your child. Who filed for the divorce?

I did.

Why?

Because he had a a child.

Excuse me.

He got someone pregnant.

During the marriage.

Yeah.

Okay. Keep going.

So, I filed for divorce and.

And are you better off now than you were when you were married?

I am. Yes.

Financially?

Yes, I would say so.

No, no, no, no, no, ma'am. The. The numbers are real clear. So, your husband had an affair and got someone pregnant, right?

Right.

So, you filed for divorce.

Okay.

And what state is your husband in or ex-husband?

O. Um, Oklahoma.

Welcome Oklahoma. And I'm from there. And you're in Washington State, right?

I am.

So that's at least a 4-hour flight.

How often does your son see his father?

Um, Thanksgiving. Yes. Summertime.

Does he have full summers?

Yes. And.

So he sees his son during the summertime.

Yeah.

And then the remainder of the year he's with you.

That's correct.

And you took your son, you took his son away from him. For what?

Um,

You saying something about your family. What about it? They were in the state, you know, of Washington, but um.

Yeah.

No, I. That's that's not an answer.

You were in Oklahoma.

I didn't want to get divorced. I didn't want to leave.

You filed for divorce, ma'am. What do you think happened? The divorce fairy made you do it? Ma'am, you were in Oklahoma. You filed for divorce and you went to Washington. Why did you move to Washington?

Because that's where my support was at the time.

Right. Right. Your. Your family. Your support. So, um, Oklahoma's cheaper than the state of Washington, number one. And it doesn't sound like your family is that strong or stable. So, you moved. You moved and now, uh, are you getting a lot of help from your mother because there's no father?

Um, no. I actually. My. My adopted mom, she doesn't talk to me anymore. None of my.

So, you're in Washington by yourself?

Yeah. No, I am.

All right. So, listen, listen, listen, ma'am. This is why I say this is a mess. Everything you've told me continues to unravel. Here's what it is. Your husband committed adultery. It hurt. You. You decided to make an emotional decision. You filed for divorce and you punished him and did what was good for you. So you thought and you took his child from him and you made him become a part-time father and you making your son suffer that only seeing his father in the summertime and what do you have to show for it? A job as a a nail tech and a receptionist and nothing else. This is bad. That's why I said I don't need to know all the the in the the ins and outs, but he would be better off with his father in Oklahoma than with you. You've made all these decisions, ma'am, outside of your husband having an affair, but then you turn around and say you didn't want to file for divorce. You didn't want to divorce your husband, but you did.

Mhm.

When I say I didn't want to, it was more like like I wanted to and I did, but it wasn't like I would love. I wanted a family, but I just couldn't get.

But you ended it.

But.

You ended your family.

Yeah. And I don't necessarily regret that because he wasn't, you know.

Of course not. Cuz you have no idea what a family is, ma'am. And this is why I said, ma'am, I feel like I'm talking to a teenage girl. I didn't want to find. I didn't want. Listen, it's not an insult, ma'am. Go look at what the women are typing in the chat room when this show's over. If. If I'm off, they'll tell you. But what you're saying.

I understand what you're saying.

I get it. So, you are. You are. You've gone. You you've had a a a complex upbringing. You're no one. You're under no one's leadership. There's no one helping you. Nothing. And you're on a coast by yourself raising the most vulnerable type boy there is in this country. That's what I'm trying to get you to understand. You can barely take care of you. Let me also say this. If you weren't as attractive as you are, would you be able to make some of the moves you do?

Like what moves?

Um, well, I don't know. So, when I'll go there. Um.

Scratch that.

I mean, I would say I have the privilege. You know, they talk about.

You have pretty privilege. That's what you have. Yeah. So, people do for you that they wouldn't do for an unattractive woman, but that [ __ ] runs out.

I understand. M.

So the net net of it, ma'am, is let me let me let me level. Let me level set this for you. The moment you said "I do," you became a wife. Put up the little girl, put up everything else. You made an oath and you decided to break that oath. Your husband cheated on you. He broke your. He broke his vow. You broke your covenant. You broke your covenant with God, with your man. That's what you chose to do. If you're a Christian, uh, the whole curse thing that you're living more under that than your ex, then you took his son from him. You didn't do it for his son's benefit. You did it for you, ma'am. You're selfish. Everything you've been saying is about you and what you want. And I. That's why I said you still need to be in therapy. There's a lot of work that needs to be done and you don't need to be parenting this boy by yourself. He's the one that's going to suffer.

Okay.

That's why I say why not just send him back to his father? But unfortunately, women like you feel like doing that is like a failure or if I don't have this, I have nothing. It's not a puppy. He's a boy. I know he would.

I understand.

And you would be better off by sending him to his father because you'd have a. His son would have a fighting chance right now, man. You can't provide.

Yeah, I know.

Is. Is your father? Is your ex-husband remarried?

Um, he's not remarried, but he does have a girlfriend, and they do have two other children. I. I don't care about the other children, ma'am. I really don't. All I care about is your ex-husband remarried.

No.

Does your ex-husband? Are you guys on a on a reasonable page?

Well, we kind of are.

Okay.

So, this has really helped me.

Listen, listen, listen, listen what I'm asking. I don't care about who he [ __ ] and how many kids he has. Get over it. Really, get over it. You have a husband and he's still tolerating this [ __ ].

I often times it's best for men and women, husband and wife to reconcile. Because let me tell you why. Men like me, I. There's no way in heck guys like me would take a woman like you seriously. It's not though you're not a beautiful woman, but you're just. It's too much, too complicated. It's just far too complicated. You have a marriage and a child. When you decide to get married, you decide to put up the girly things. When you decide to get. Have the child, life became about that boy.

Mhm. Um, if you can resolve. Uh, uh, resolve with your ex, that would be more the more likely scenario. I know there's going to be some women saying, "No, don't do that. He cheated on her." You. You've been married. You got a kid. Don't listen to people who ain't been in this fight.

Because what's the alternative? Can you really see a life in Washington DC where you have a a job or a career that you can provide well for you and your son?

Washington State.

Washington State. Washington State.

I. You know, I. I do.

What kind of skills do you have?

Um, just basic skills.

Clerical skills. You're an unskilled laborer.

Okay.

I mean, I'm not trying to be funny. Ma'am, you're an unskilled labor. You don't have a college degree.

Unskilled. You know, I'm just sleep.

You're unskilled.

I do. I have an associate's degree. I have my associate's.

An associate's in what?

Associate's in Arts. It's just like a G. I was. It's the one you get before you go towards a four-year, right? It's an associate. An associate's degree and an associate's in arts.

Yes.

Okay. And ma'am, what does an associate's in arts command on the free employment market?

Well, I mean, if I wanted to, I could probably get a job in like social work or not being a social worker, but working with, you know, people like like that. Um.

You saying you can get a job as a social worker with an associate's in art?

Kind of like a peer counselor because I. I did a lot of work.

And how much money do those people make?

Not a lot. And it's not worth it to me.

Not a lot of money. I don't.

So, man, when I say you're an unskilled worker, why did that offend you when you have a degree that won't even allow you to get an okay job, ma'am?

I guess because I just. I don't know.

It's because it's true.

Terrible.

You have no science, engineering, technology, and math. Accounting, medicine, uh, law. Those are careers. You have basically what amounts to a high school diploma plus.

Yeah.

Unskilled labor.

Oh gosh. Wow.

Why is that? Okay. Listen and hear. You have no skills. That's why you are a receptionist. What is it required? What what skills are required to be a receptionist?

Um, you know, answering phones, being organized.

Right. Basic clerical skills, stuff that's not changed since the 1910s, and you don't even have to type or file anymore. You are a woman 26 years old completely out, completely without anyone covering you. No one's covering you. No one's protecting for you, providing, teaching. You're out here making it up as you go. And that's fine, but it's not because you got a little boy. He suffers all your mistakes times 10. And you're talking as though just because you have the power of wish and sunshine that you can make it happen. And no, ma'am, you can't. Four million people have applied for unemployment insurance since COVID. And you honestly think you're going to be able to get a job when people who have actual skills are losing their jobs in this new market. You're too naive to even know what you don't know. And you have a boy. Did you hear what I just said? Did that make sense?

It makes perfect sense. It really, really does. And I think the reason why I'm just kind of like, um, not thinking I'm I'm just like, okay, is because, um, I just kind of. I do nails on the side. So, I do have a little bit of like a side hustle and, you know, I. I want to like have my own like little, um, little business where I or my own income and I don't work for anyone because it's just like that's just how I am. I'm just a little bit, you know, but I. I do take care of my business. I do handle my business and things like that. So, it's like I understand what you're saying and I know I sound like a 12-year-old.

Yes, ma'am. You do not. Well, no, ma'am. Because if you just said, "I know I do nails on the side." Understand something. Filipino Vietnamese women who don't speak English come to this country and do that. It doesn't require a lot of skill to do that. You are effectively a day laborer and you want that job that you like doing because it makes you cash. And you can feel like you make money every day because it's cash. That's that's why a lot of women like you wait tables because if you didn't do this, your options would be the strip club or prostitution. I'm going to get real with you. Those are your options. Cuz what you want to do, no one's going to. Listen, ma'am. What you want to do, no one's going to hire you for. You want to make being a nail tech a career. It's a job that you can do in any po dunk town in Oak. You can go to Walmart and be a nail technician. Ma'am, they got a little salon there in Walmart. You ain't going to make $75,000 a year as a part-time nail tech. You have no skills. You have no plans. You're. And at this point, ma'am, you're dangerous to yourself because you're talking about, well, I like to just have my own little side hustle to where I can possibly flip this into a a job and making my own business because that's just how I am. Yes, you're a free spirit, unstructured woman who needs a strong man to take care of you because you are incapable of doing it for yourself. If no one's told you, I'm going to tell you. You're incapable of taking care of yourself. You sound like a teenager. And the problem is you have a boy who's what, two? Three.

No, he's six.

Six.

So he's at the. He's six. Ouch.

Yes. When we go back to school. Don't be surprised if you start seeing a a little hellion with disciplinary problems.

I'm going to. I'm going to really sleep on the advice about, you know, his father. I think a lot of the things that you said is true. I don't want to be a selfish parent and I. I have this pandemic. I have been a little bit struggling and things like that and I. I did kind of consider myself like I don't necessarily want to be a failure, but I don't want to be selfish. So I'm going to really take that.

Failure, failure, failure happens when you look at the truth and you decide to stick your head in the sand like an ostrich and hope it goes away. That's the only way to fail.

Okay.

Is to make an emotional decision versus just saying, you know what, it's not ideal. Oklahoma, Washington, look, it'll be better for you to be in the same state with your ex-husband because at least you'd have some help and at least cost of living is lower. Uh, trust me, you'd be better off there. Uh, so I'm going to leave it there. Keep in contact. Let me know how it goes, though. But, um, but you really need to take into consideration. You don't. I don't think you understand what's about to happen with this economic market. They're not. The jobs just aren't there. Ma'am, it's not what it was in February. The world has forever changed and we haven't even scratched the surface of what happened. Is Washington off lockdown?

We're like phase two. Okay. So, like our nail.

Here in Atlanta. Here in Atlanta. I was in Neiman Marcus the day they shut everything down. Neiman Marcus announced that it was looking to to file bankruptcy. Long and short of it is Neiman Marcus is probably is going to cut about 40%. All those people in retail, those millions and millions of women out there who have who have more skills than you, more work history, I'm not. It's not funny, ma'am.

No, it's funny.

It's not funny, ma'am. When the when the when the when the, uh, um, when unemployment runs out and all that runs out. See, what this country has never seen is has never seen homeless women. But we're going to see homeless women because there's not enough jobs for all of these unmarried, unattached women. The. We are not meant to be by ourselves. Ma'am, you have zero support and you're an unskilled laborer. You might as well be an illegal immigrant with your with your skill sets. You. You think that's. You think that's hyperbolic, but I need you to understand what I said. But for the fact that you speak the language and you graduated from here on paper, you have literally no skills that. That an illegal immigrant to this country, someone coming up from Mexico or coming over the border off the boat, you're doing unskilled work and you're not going to college to get a degree or going to get any certification. So, you're not going to get any more skills. So, and to think I'm going to turn this unskilled thing into a $100,000 a year hustle is folly. You got a lot of serious thinking to do, man. And you better. You got to hurry up and do it because you got a boy. But, uh, I'm. I'm going to steal what I say. You need to. You need to just. You need to talk to his father and and especially and and last thing and I got to run. You do realize that a boy only needs his mother up to the age of seven. After age seven, he needs his father more than he needs his mother.

Okay.

That's been his. That's since the dawn of time. Heck, the ancient Spartans even figured that out.

Well, no one told me that. So, I mean, it's really good to know. Okay. All right.

So, thank you so much for your time and advice.

All right. So, if you made it all the way through this one, then you already understand this wasn't just a normal call. This was one of those situations where what someone wants and what actually makes sense are two completely different things. Because if you really pay attention, she wasn't asking for something small. She was asking for a very specific kind of life, provider, husband, multiple kids, staying at home, a certain level of comfort, but at the same time, she hadn't really sat down and figured out what it actually takes to make that happen or what kind of man is even able to provide that in the first place. And that's where everything started to fall apart. It's easy to say, "I want a high value man." But that comes with a whole set of expectations on the other side. That man has options, real options. And he's not just choosing based on looks or potential. He's looking at the full situation. Your past, your present, your responsibilities, your mindset, all of it. And when Kevin started breaking that down, you could see the realization start to hit because this wasn't about whether she's a good person or not. This wasn't about disrespect. This was about alignment, about whether what she's asking for actually matches where she is in life right now. And that's a tough conversation for a lot of people. Another thing that stood out is how many decisions were made earlier in life without really thinking about the long-term impact. Early marriage, divorce, having a child, those are major life moves. And once those things happen, they don't just disappear. They become part of your reality moving forward. And anyone coming into your life has to take all of that on. That's not judgment. That's just how life works. And the part people don't like to hear is that the more complex your situation becomes, the smaller your pool gets when it comes to certain types of men. Not because you don't deserve love, but because people choose based on what makes sense for them. That's it. What Kevin was really doing here wasn't tearing her down. He was forcing her to look at things clearly, not emotionally, not based on what sounds good, but based on what actually adds up. Because at the end of the day, you can want whatever you want. Nobody's stopping you. But wanting something and qualifying for it are not the same thing. And if you don't take the time to understand that difference, you end up chasing a situation that was never really realistic to begin with. So the real takeaway here is simple. Be honest about where you are. Not where you think you are, not where you want to be, but where you actually stand right now, because that's the version of you the world responds to. Drop your thoughts in the comments because I already know this one is going to have people split down the middle. And if you're rocking with this kind of content, hit that like button, subscribe, and stay locked in. We're keeping it real, no filter. I'll catch you in the next.

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2 HOURS Of Kevin Samuels HUMBLING Single Mothers

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