Transcription
Praise the Lord. Hallelujah. Wow. We've had a really good time today on the set of the Marketplace Network. Thank you for joining us. And I just praise God for all of you allowing us in your home. Maybe you're letting us come into your, no, your church service, or, oh, maybe we're into your business area where you're allowing us to be on your tablet. You're maybe there's a TV set, or your phone, or whatever. Thank you. And of course, this is Pastoring God's Sheep. Of course, the great apostle, Pastor Tim, is with us today. Of course, I'm just tagging along, Dr. Ken. I just want to jump in and, uh, field some of these emails that he gets a lot of. He's been with us a long time and he has over a hundred episodes. I want to encourage you to subscribe. You're really missing your, uh, what you have. There's a QR code on the right of your, left of your, the screen. You can take a picture of it and all that is free. Yes, I did say that. Free. So, you can go back and watch all 100 episodes free. He does give them all away. He doesn't charge anything. And by the way, he has a book coming out the first part of December. So, you want to get the book. Oh, yes, I am selling a book, but it's for your benefit. He's got it around $10. What is $10? You know what $10 will do? $10 will put a book in somebody's hands. They can't afford it. Now, hear me. How many of us that know elderly people? Well, I'm one of them. Elderly people. Now, listen to me. Elderly people, or somebody handicapped. Now, listen. Somebody is struggling with health. Don't we know people like that? Somebody's got a lot of children that are struggling. Somebody struggling financially. Can I get an amen? Somebody that's got a lot of children that can't handle all them. Maybe somebody that just can't get the right job. Struggling from job to job. Don't we all? I don't see any hands out. Come on. Don't we need a daily miracle? This is what the book's going to be. I don't remember. Pastor hasn't decided on the exact title because it's not done yet, but it's something about daily m. It's based off Psalm 68:19. He loads us daily with benefits. What does that mean? We can expect a daily miracle. Why? Because we ask.
He's a gracious God. All good things come from him. How do we know? 'Cause we ask. James 1:5. We ask. He'll give it to us. He doesn't make fun of us. He wouldn't give us a snake if we asked for a fish. You see what I'm saying? So, what I'm getting at is this. Listen to me. It's your time to be serious with the Lord. The time's getting short. What are you going to pick? The world's method, you know, be on Facebook, Instagram, look at all the movie stars. It's a fantasy lifestyle. You get all the wisdom in the world. Facts will change because of the season, our culture, who's a president, who's a dictator, what's going on in the world. But the truth that's in the Bible, it'll never change. His truth was forever and ever. His word will never come back void. It says he, everything will pass, heaven and earth. But his truth, his word will last forever. That's what the Bible says. So stay in truth. Stay in the word. So let's jump right into it. We've got a good one tonight. We're going to talk about, real quick, and this will inspire all of you. Relationships. How do we keep them? You want to know? Now, first off, I want to start out with how do we discern a relationship? How do we know if it's not going very well? So, we're going to turn to Pastor of what he sees. But let me set this up properly. Now, you know, him and I are at an age where we've been around the block. I hate to say how many times, a lot around the block. And I've traveled quite a bit around the world. And I've been a lot of places. I've been a millionaire twice. I've been everywhere, made money, and lost it. I thought I had a lot of friends when I had money. And when I didn't, I didn't have any. And then I've had a lot of friends when I had no money. But I do know this. I always was after the person that was in lack. I don't know what that was about me. So why are you friends with the friends you have? Something to get something out of something because they're good-looking and they're popular. Somebody has got money. Some that has something that you want. What is it?
So that's the first thing that we discern. Too many times. And I want you to get this. I want you to look that up. I'm not going to say what it means. You can look at Pastor Tim's one of his episodes. Thank God he's got over a hundred of them. He talks about discernment. And you should know what discernment means. I want you to look that word up. What discernment is. The church leaves it to the front door when they go to learn. Nobody knows what discernment is anymore. Discernment is key. It's a precious gift. And you, you can claim that gift. First Corinthians 14:1. We can desire the gifts. What are the gifts? First Corinthians 12, it talks about, uh, 8 through 11, there's nine gifts of the spirit. You can get one of those gifts or you can claim all of them if you'll believe God for them. It says all you have to do is ask. We ask not because we, we don't ask.
So discernment. Why are we friends with who we're friends with? Now the best answer is, I don't want anything. I'm friends because we have something in common. That's fine. If there's a common thread, if you can see a common friend, start there. There should be something in common. If you have nothing in common, it would be very tough to be a friend. But you don't have to have everything in common because that'd be boring because if everything was exactly the same, you would not learn anything. So really, the rule of thumb is at least 60% in common, but it can be down to 40 or 30. It doesn't, you don't have to have all that much in common. But, and the key thing is age really doesn't have anything to do with it. But you don't want to be too much older or too much younger. Can I get an amen? Now I'm talking about friendship. I'm not talking about marriage or a boyfriend and girlfriend, that kind of thing. Uh, but I am talking about just being friends. Now when you go to school, it's a little bit different, but I, it could be different later on in life. A mentor. So, we're going to turn Pastor Tim loose to pray for us to discern for us that we will be sharp in the spirit to what's a good relationship. Now, what do we have to offer? I, I want to turn your attention to look inward. Now, if we're spirit-filled, and I highly recommend again, we can thank God for Pastor Tim's 100 videos, and they're all free. You can understand what a spirit-filled is because you can look up and learn how to be spirit-filled. Okay? There's a, there's a handful of ways to do it. You can, and you want to be spirit-filled. That's where the power is. But you want to make sure when you, uh, this, what am I giving? What do I have to offer? I want you to write this down. This is your homework. Beside it, five things that you have to offer your friends. Then five things you're looking for at for a friend. And I bet you a nickel if you wrote down five friends that would come to your aid if you were in the hospital, if you were stranded out in the road that would pick you up at 3 in the morning, or, uh, somebody that would loan you, uh, $100 that come out and give it to you right away. Somebody would, uh, bail you out of jail. Come on. Or here's a really, really good one, and this is a tough one. If you were stranded, you had a boyfriend or girlfriend that broke up and you, you know, you couldn't function, you had no money, you're thrown out, minimum, they had to come out, get you in, and another state, would they do it? Five things. I bet you a nickel, you have nobody. If you even had one person that get any one of the five, if you had one, it takes a lot for one of those persons to get any one of those five. I don't hear an amen. I lost all my amens and I'll give myself an amen. Amen. So that's what you're looking for to build. I have a handful of friends that would do that for me. I am almost 70 and I've developed those kinds because I have paid the price to be that kind of friend for them. I'm not building myself up, but that's what I expect if I had somebody like that. I'm not expecting them to do that for me, but that's the kind of friend I would be for them.
Can I get an amen? So, Pastor, pray for us and give us some of your wisdom. Time's up. Just kidding. Pray for us. I know it's 2 minutes or less. No, I'm kidding. It's because of time. Could you give us a short, uh, thought on, uh, how we have to be careful on discerning our friendships and pray for us.
Amen. Time's up. No. I know you don't have any discernments. friends.
First of all, as a Christian, you need to find out if that friend or hopeful friend is also a Christian because you don't want to be unequally yoked in your, in a friendship which with somebody that doesn't believe. So, det, that's the first thing you need to determine. And if that friendship is going south, maybe one of you lied to the other one. Maybe you're not that individual, or you aren't the believer in Christ that you thought you were, or you thought they were. If that's the case, you're going to have trouble with your friendship, with your relationship. But you can turn that individual around through God's word and the agape love that he has taught us through Christ. Father, we just thank you and we ask you to give the people viewing this program the discernment of their friendships. Are they being lied to? Or is the friend somebody that, as Dr. Ken said, will be there for them if they're in trouble, if they're sick, if they're stranded? If not, maybe they need to find a stronger and better friend. But help them to discern what that friendship is and if it's going south, why, and what they can do to change it. I thank you and I praise you in the name of your son Christ Jesus. Amen.
Pastor's got a great point, but let me add this. I got a hand. Out of the five people that I've been friends with a long time, three are not saved. Hear my point. They're still not saved, but I got saved late. On that note, I would believe everything he just said. But I'm still hanging on to the desires. If I'm really praying and believing, I'm believing God they will come in. 'Cause I'm not taking no for an answer. I believe God is greater. I really think God is bigger than that. But we can't go past their free will. So, I, I believe it is a challenge, but I believe it can be done. But they are tremendous friends. But I, I'm right there with them. He's right. You have to base your relationships on biblical principles and being a believer. But let's go the other way real quick. Now we've decided and we have to discern what, how to get a good friend. Okay. Now all of a sudden you've got a good friend. This is you young folks out there. Not old people like me that are young, young like Pastor Tim. You, you got, you're in school. Oh, it's the best friend I know. We'll never leave. You know, I still got that same friend now. I'm seeing him Saturday, by the way. Still the same friend. We grew up together. Blah, blah, blah. You know, you think your friends forever have everything in common. You do until you don't. So, how? My question is, how now that I'm spirit-filled, you know, he's drawn by the church. Maybe he, he's dabbled in the church. I, I just can't believe he can't. But I, I think through bishop and eyewitnessing, Bishop goes with us quite a bit and thank God he's got the school and it's well-versed in the verses. Um, we're hoping that, you know, only we can only plant the seed, only God's perfect will can be done in his life. Um, but how can we discern how long is this something for everlasting or how long? We got to be careful when we're young like that. And I remember, man, I had some really good friends growing up. I thought this is it. We went everywhere together, you know, for 5, 10 years and all of a sudden, boom, they're gone. And we talked about this in a previous episode and Pastor can help us discern that. But how do we as believers and we have to protect ourselves and as we grow, we have to be, remember each and every, uh, person, believe it or not, hopefully, if, if you're young and you're going to, um, uh, Christian, uh, uh, uh, churches and outreaches as young youths and so on. But let's, let's take it further. You're a young adult. Hopefully, you're going that you're dating, you know, people that are, uh, believers and then you, you, you know, you're in your 40s and 50s. Hopefully, you're still continuing that mold. But how do you know when you're that young? 'Cause it's so impressionable when you're older, a little bit more guarded. You've already been left a few times. But how, Pastor, can you kind of, I'm not saying, you know, you, that's how you learn. You have to keep your heart open and keep trying. But how do you discern? You know, there's always the, the sign on the wall saying it might not be going as planned. How do you, how do you discern that?
Well, of course, when you make a friend, you expect it to be a lifetime friendship, but a lot of friendships are seasonal. There you go. They're there for a reason. They're there for you to lift them up. Or maybe they're there to lift you up. It could go either way. But once, like the friendship I've had, my friend was there to bring me back into the church to mentor me in the word to where I was built up enough in my belief to go on my own without his mentoring, without his helping me understand what I was trying to do. Friendships, you don't know how long they're going to last.
Yes. None of us do. I've had friendships that have lasted a week. I've had friendship, I've got a couple of friends that I've known since 1970 and we're still friends and we're still communicating with each other. So, you don't know. You could have that friend that's there for maybe a week, a month, a year, 20 years. But once God decides that they served their purpose, he may take them out of your life. So, Father, we just pray that the people out there, the young people, the older people have the discernment to know why somebody became their friend. M. Why that friendship lasts for whatever length of time it lasts. Make I ask that they get the discernment if a friend leaves, why they left. I had to ask for that discernment 'cause I was lost. I had no idea why my friend decided, well, I don't want to talk to you anymore. Don't call me. But the young people need to learn why these things happen. And it's because the person has done what they were called to do. Or maybe God had them leave you as a friend because he could see something that they were going to do or were doing behind your back that was going to destroy you. We just thank you for this ability to discern and we just pray that people grow in that discernment in the precious name of your son. Amen.
Amen. So I think to get us a little bit more clarity is you to be a friend, you have to be a good friend. I meet so many people that don't have any friends and they're shocked. It's always when they come in, it's if something happens, they blame that person. For example, everything's going smooth. If something happens, well, you didn't tell me this or you forgot to mention that or you didn't give me the right directions. I'm not talking about Pastor Tim. I'm kidding. That was the funniest thing I've ever said. If you know, Pastor Tim, that was the funniest thing I ever said 'cause he blames me for everything and I don't hear an amen. So, here's my point. You have to be selfless and he should be taking notes. You should be selfless when it comes to friends. Remember, it's everybody. And when you talk to people, nobody wants to be, uh, oh, it's your fault or you didn't, you forgot to tell me or you, you, uh, uh, you should be this or we all need to be accountable. Yes. Yes. Yes. But we have to be careful with our speech. Was it in love the way we said it? Were we careful how we said it? Do, do we lift them up? Do, and make sure we don't, I always make it sure like I'm, I'm not looking for anything. I don't care one way or another. I'm just trying to help you to move forward. If you want to do this, great. If you don't, you don't. So, I always leave it up to them. They do it, they do it. If they don't, they don't. And I, I'm trying to make it as easy as possible for them to make it easy. And so, I throw myself out where it's almost, it's almost inconvenient for me that I have to arrive first. Nobody's ever on time. I don't hear an amen. Nobody's ever on time. And nobody's saying amen again. Nobody's on time. So you got to be on time. Listen, you have to respect the person's time. You have to be clear and what you're saying. You got to be clear on, uh, if you're going to meet where, when, how, what, uh, what's the meaning about kind of go over everything. Oh, let's go for dinner. Let's do this, let's do, and map everything out. Don't let anything for change. And I think a lot of times in our own mind we have these self, uh, thought thoughts of how we're all going to hang out and do this, this, and this and if it doesn't come to pass, we're offended and this didn't happen, they didn't say this or, or who's paying is another good one, the money issue. If you're treating, just say, "I'm treating. You don't have to bring any money." Or, "Can we bring our own money? I'm on a budget." Just be honest. And I think that helps. And then you'll see a pattern eventually. You'll see what people are about. And they like some of my friends have never paid a dime. This I know this. They never pay anything. We're always stuck paying or some people pay for us. So that's great.
So either way, uh, whatever that is, you know, we're grateful for it. So, we're prepared either way. We always try to be on time. We always try to be there for them. Uh, we look for whatever it is they need us to be. So, but you don't want to be abused and you don't, if it's too much, you know, you have to reconsider, do I really want to be their friend? Is it too much? Is it too much effort? Friends should be fun and exciting, you know. So the last thought I have is how do we nurture these friendships, good or bad? If it's going bad, do I give it another shot? Maybe I said something offensive. Maybe we, uh, gone down the wrong road. And we always have to, I want to say this clearly and I want you to hear what I'm saying. Ego is always a play on friendship. Have we offended somebody's ego? That's huge. Especially when you get a little bit older. Everybody's a billionaire. You know, nobody's got a dime. It just makes me so mad. They got all this money. Well, why do you tell me you didn't have any money? You know, I, I would have paid or I can't pay. I would have just said, "Oh, I can't afford both of us. Can we do it another time when I can't pay or can we do something less?" Just tell me. Don't make me guess or think or why. So, I think that's another thing is let's just be upfront honestly and make plans. And here's another thing that drives me nuts and I want you to write this down. When you make plans, give it some time. So, the people that schedule, nobody knows how to keep a schedule. And here's another thing. Nobody knows how to leave a voicemail and nobody answers them. I lost the amens. Nobody knows how to leave a voicemail and answer them. Text is not a voicemail. I like to talk to the people. Text is great. Text, you don't know what they're saying half the time. Don't forget you can text. You got a minute? Can I call you and rattle off whatever you're going to say? That's how I would do it to do it right. So, Pastor, your final thought as we close this section out. How do we nurture that? How at the last minute, if it's not going that good or if it's going really good, how would you discern how far we'd go?
First of all, friendships are based on trust, on honesty, and on helping each other. If you're in, if your friend is in need,
Yeah. Maybe his car broke down and he needs to find a way to get it fixed.
That's a good word. Maybe you have a friend or you know somebody that can fix his car for him without it costing him a fortune. But be honest, honesty or lack of honesty has destroyed more friendships than I could count.
Amen. That's good. And be trustworthy. What do I mean by that? Dr. K just mentioned it a minute ago. If you're going to, if you say you're going to be somewhere, be there and be there on time.
Amen. I try. It doesn't always happen. You're pretty much on time. Yeah. I try to be where I say I'm going to be when I'm when I say or as much as I can. I try to get there a little bit early is I've been taught if you're not early, you're already late.
Amen. That's a good one. So, those are two things right there. Third one is to build your friendship on the agape love that God has given us. God doesn't expect something from us to be our friend. He gives to us freely.
Yes. If you want to hold on to a friendship, you want to build that friendship and keep it lasting,
you've got to give that agape love.
Teach it. You cannot say, "Okay, I'm your friend, but you have to do this, this, and this for me."
Amen. That's not a friendship.
Correct. That's being used.
Good word. That's being abusive. Amen.
So, learn God's love and build your friendship on that.
Good word. Pray us out.
Amen. Father, we know what your love is for us. We just pray that we learn what that love is and how to use that love, in our friendships, in our relationships with our wife, our husband, our children, our parents. Give us the discernment in that and the desire to build our friendships on that love. I just thank you and I praise you in the precious name of your son. Amen.
Amen. If you liked what Pastor's talking about, don't forget to comment. But more importantly, send him a seed because he spends a lot of money and time on these videos are not cheap. But his videos are free for you if you'll subscribe. Of course, the books just $10. But he's going to teach for two months free extra nuggets. And that means he's not going to write a second book, so you have to buy that. it. He's going to teach a more deeper subjects on each and every chapter so you too can understand how to get your miracle on relationships, finances, or healings. So he takes you from the very simple how to pray for a headache to praying for cancer or how to pray for your car it won't start to getting a new car or whatever. Just growing your faith. That's what it's all about. The biblical way. Not spooky spiritual magic hocus pocus, but biblical sound principles from Jesus Christ, from the word itself, the truth and honest ways that you too that God will honor through his word. So send them $10, $20, $30, $40. It's right there on the Zelle right there. Send it to him now. Don't think about it. Don't let the enemy talk you out of your blessing. If you'll do this, whatever you sow, you will reap. Galatians 6:7. That's biblical. So if you're struggling financially, you need to save his seed. Watch what God will do for you if you'll do this.
So it's very important. Don't forget his book's coming out. It's very important that you subscribe. Don't forget to look at the other previous videos so you too can keep learning and share with your friends so you guys can get a dialogue going and get deeper into the word because it's all about Christ because he's coming soon. Remember, at the end of the day, it's not about us. It's about what are we going to do for our neighbor? We're supposed to love our God with all of our heart and treat our neighbor above ourselves. If we just honor those two laws, it'll pass all the other laws. We don't even need the other ones. Now, think about that just for a second. That's what we're talking about with relationships. So, sow the seed now and watch what God will do for you. Till next week, the great Pastor Tim. I'm Dr. Ken. We'll see you next week on Pastoring God Sheep.