Transcription
[موسيقى] [موسيقى] السلام عليكم ورحمه الله وبركاته. My dear respected brothers and sisters in Islam, welcome to this very, very important episode. We are going to discuss something that has become really widespread and alarming. And so, I wanted all the parents, all the religious leaders, and educators who are watching us today, not only to listen attentively and make notes, but rather to bring even their children, uh, right now to watch this episode and, uh, start making real notes so that you can, inshallah, tackle this, uh, important topic.
Brothers and sisters, Islam, as we experience, pornography has become one of the most dangerous drugs of our time. Yes, it is like a drug. It is even more dangerous than cocaine and heroin. Because a cocaine addict, any drugs, quick recognition, identify them because of physical weakness. Maybe they can commit crimes, they can even kill in order for them to have these kind of drugs. But pornography, might be a religious leader, might be a dentist, there is any system that you can cancel. And that's most of the people come asking for help. They would say that, "I have never said this to anyone before. I have been watching porn for 20, 30 years, 15 years, 12 years, and you are the first one I'm telling this to." So, it is really a painful secret that is kept by for for many years. And that's why it is the right time for us to discuss it in public. I know that there are many Muslims around the world, very conservative, they don't want to talk about this. But if we don't talk about it.
And sisters, how I, all parents, all the educators, and religious leaders to start studying the science behind pornography addiction and how can we offer the necessary help for our brothers and sisters who are addicted to it. And yes, there are Muslims who are addicted to pornography, and we have to be very honest about it, and we have to be compassionate.
Cycle of pornography. Why pornography is number one, my brothers and sisters, Islam. Access. So easy access. Pornography, 20 years back or 25 years back, for anyone to watch porn, he would really go through a lot of hassle in order to obtain a VHS, a magazine, and in order to that, to go through this magazine, have to go somewhere, he have to wait for his parents to sleep or something like that in order to watch. And that's why it was less addictive. But now, it's just on your. My brothers and sisters, you can have access to filthy images. So, number one, accessibility. Number one, affordability. Years before, you have to buy the tape, or you have to rent the tape, or you have to buy the magazine. Now, all you need to do is to just click on your computer, and here you go, you can have millions of.
Affordable. Nature of porn. Porn industry intends to make porn so exciting to an extent that actually go beyond the norm, that these things are never happen in real intimacy, in real sex intercourse between husband and wife. And the danger of that is, my sisters, that when husband, and the images of the girls exploited in these movies, and then he look back at his wife, she's not the same as this porn act. Then he started to lose interest in the real lawful intimacy. That's how porn becomes addictive. And the last point is, it is anonymous. Like nobody can notice. As we said, that you are watching porn on your cell, on your laptop, and that creates.
Cycle. How it works. Now, the science tells us that there is a lot of chemical reaction. I don't want to go technical for now for this brief episode, because basically, this is part of a whole day workshop, which I intend, inshallah, to conduct in different cities. I intend, inshallah, to help those who are trapped in the cycle of pornography addiction, inshallah. So, briefly, there are chemical reactions that normally pops in the brain whenever you. One chemical reaction is dopamine, one of them. And it happens that dopamine is actually responsible for our happiness and responsible for our addiction. So, for example, if you tasted sugar and you like the sugar so much, it would register immediately in your brain that so and so like sugar. And so the dopamine's job is to remind you, it's time for sugar now. It's time to eat sugar. And this exactly happens when you watch.
Subhanallah. Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala. Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala. Enjoining for relation. Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala. Producing things. Producing. Prophet Muhammad Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam. Quran. Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala. "Qul lil mu'mineena yaghuddu min abṣārihim wa yaḥfaẓū furūjahum." Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala. Quran. Prophet Muhammad Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam. And things that.
Some come not a day, not home, things not nor see between man and woman makes act in an unnatural way.
Out.
And the justification. Cycle of pornography addiction. The justification is, you will start saying, "It is better than it is better than going out and hunting for a prostitute." So, watching porn is okay. So, you will justify your action. So, a trigger, justification, and then the action. And after the action, and the pleasure expected, you will start feeling terribly regret. You know, and and feeling that you, "How I wish I never had access to these things." Regret. And then comes next is false quitting. There are some people after they watch and they get the pleasure that they wanted, they say, "From now on, I'm not gonna watch porn anymore." And that's what we call false quitting. Because after days, if you do not protect your gaze, you will relapse and you will have, you will watch again and again, and you will keep yourself in that cycle for many, many years. I will just tell you one story of a person who approached. He was a photographer. He used to take pictures of naked people, and he used to pleasure himself to death until he reached the point after marrying his beloved wife and having children from her, three daughters and a son. His daughter caught him in the act. His him came. My off said, "I never seen my family for years because of porn." Al. He of watching. The consequence was not. Cycle. Inshallah.
These steps that I discussed may not for everyone. It actually depends on your level of addiction. Some people, these steps doesn't work with some people. These steps might be helpful, but they are very essential. So, what is tip number one? Tip number one is to seek Allah's help. I have read over 150 books regarding this subject, my brothers and sisters, but I haven't seen any book says, "Seek Allah's help." Because most of the books written on the subject are from. Subhanallah. Has been neglected. My brothers and sisters, seek help from Him. You know, in your. Him. Don't say not responsible. Any ever hope. Subhanallah. He forgives sins. Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala. All. Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala. Responsible. Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala. Alaihi Salam. He prayed. Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala.
Number two. All someone. You can't keep it secret anymore. But be careful. You have to tell someone whom you trust. You have to be careful whom you are talking to. May our sister be will help out. It's not, you know, advisable to go and tell your husband because maybe he would react differently. You know, our natures are so different. Men are more jealous than women. And so, if the husband comes to know that his wife is watching porn or addicted to pornography, it might create a very bad consequence. So, you may tell a very close friend. You may tell a coach, professional coach, a counselor, and he would help you, inshallah, to go about the curing journey, inshallah.
Number three. Eliminate all pornographic, uh, pictures, images from your computer. Even you start, you know, staying away from TV itself, from your TV series, Hollywood, Bollywood, and all these things. Because many people think that pornography is only about two people having sex. But rather, even a girl wearing inappropriate clothes can be a kind of pornography trigger to those who are addicted. So, stay away from any of these movies, or else you will be relapsed again and again. And the relapse feels so bad. Many people say the guilt is so heavy now, and that makes them reach to a level of depression, deep depression. My brother and sisters, I have a brother who came to me, he's 18 years old boy, and the first sentence he uttered was, "What? I wanted to commit suicide." A Muslim wanted to commit suicide, my brother and sisters, because of porn. Because he reached the point that he, he kept on watching porn for six hours every night for three continuous years. Al. Now he's doing well, alhamdulillah. Now he's porn-free. Was successful in getting rid of pornography. But he is suffering from very severe sexual dysfunction. He doesn't have the ability to get married anymore and function normally because as a result of wasting all the best time of life, the watching.
So, be careful, my brothers and sisters. Number four is to divide your goals into small goals. So, for example, some people, as I said, there is a false quitting period where you said, "I'm never going to watch porn anymore." This doesn't work in most cases. Instead, you say, "What? Okay, today is Thursday. I'm not gonna watch porn until the next Thursday." So, you have one week to stay away from porn. And, inshallah, another small. From for one week. Now, I'm stopping for another days, another days, another days, another days. Whenever you reach to your goal, you give yourself another small goal. So, divide your goals into small goals.
Number five. Do not ever punish yourself when you fall. Because you will, you will relapse again and again. Pornography addiction, my brothers and sisters, is very complex, very powerful. People addicted. Do not. That's that's the thing that we have to understand. And that's why I'm advising my teachers, my scholars of the Deen, to really be considerate when someone comes and tells you that, "I'm addicted to porn or I'm watching porn and I can't get rid of it." Instead of telling them, "Haram, haram, haram," which is of course, it's important to inform them that it is haram, but that in most cases doesn't work because they are addicted. They can't help themselves to stay away from porn. So, we need to really study the science behind this addiction in order to offer them some help.
Remember Prophet, when a man came to him, him, "All me, commit." See, this was a person who was considered to be among the best of all generations, one of the companions of the Prophet Muhammad. Alaihi. The Prophet Muhammad, him, "Haram." He, him, "Don't you know the Quran said about addiction?" This is the punishment and so and so forth. The Prophet did not get angry at the man, but rather, "Ummak, lam yajid." And the man would answer, saying, "No." "I don't." "Acc happened to my family." "My loved ones." And the Prophet Muhammad Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam, reason other daughter and Alaihi. He, "He, he." He placed his hand over the man's heart and made him. Allah remove the love of woman from his heart, meaning unlawful woman from his heart. And after that, the man was good to go on the path of purity. So, sometimes we need to tackle the subject not from a spiritual viewpoint, but rather from a scientific viewpoint. It would work, especially when it is addictive behavior.
Number six, my brothers and sisters, who are addicted, who know now what I have been discussing in the past few minutes that, "Yes, I'm suffering from this addiction. Every time I promise myself never to watch again, and yet I can't help myself, and I go again and again and watch porn." So, what I should do? Develop new habits. Monitor yourself. When do I normally porn? Most people that I porn, midnight. Epitome of sleeping early. And don't tell me, you know, "I can't sleep before 2, I can't sleep before 3 AM. I have tried a lot." Don't tell me that because you're talking to someone who used to sleep at 4 AM. People would go to the for, and I go to sleep during, and I wake up during Maghrib time because I used to sing. Used to go to bars. Subhanallah. Habit. Chit work. Trit andak cycle. And if you are a prayer days, inshallah.
Number. In seeking the cure. Like, if you have already spoken to someone, a professional coach, close friend, always tell them whenever, always tell that I. Can do and will, inshallah. More tips, more curing tips. Them. Number. Is don't be as said by false quitting. When you quit for a month, a month, say, "Porn, finally." Don't do that. Don't be happy. Continue with your, continue with the habits that you have developed, whether it is sport, swimming, sleeping early, reading beneficial books. Continue with this habit for a long time. I would say that if you are able successfully to shift your habit and never to watch porn for one year, then only then we can say you have reached the path of purity.
Number. My sisters, your of the next consequence of porn. Know, even myself, I used to my laughing me. Can when open. Laugh. Careful. How could. Watching. You are not alone. Don't be when you lock all doors, you lock all windows and think that you are alone because your parents are not around. Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala. Make remember. Die while watching. My sisters, Islam. And Muhammad Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam. Man be resurrected on the day of judgment upon the thing that he had performed. Imagine with me. Resurrected. Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala. While watching porn. Can you? What will you expect? How will you explain? Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala. The Prophet Muhammad Alaihi Wasallam. Deeds will be judged by its endings. Whatever you have done at the end of your life will determine your destiny, whether Jannah or Jahannam. And the. Remember the consequence of watching porn. Because I know examples from. Where I Hong Kong. I know examples of people who died while on. Children. Save. Am. Last point I here is, you have learned now. This is for parents, for educators, and even for those who are addicted. You have to learn about this filth industry, about those people who have actually produced it. Insult about our Prophet. Are the same people who are producing. Products. Making. Just one click. Learn. Industry. Aw call. Jo. My team. Those in. Program. Break.
And morally, you are not bad. You are not. Your addiction, addiction is not yourself. I know that you have now developed something like, you know, you are struggling between two personalities. One person is telling you, "Watch porn anyway." Other. Want to. Nic. Muss. And nons. Suffering from this addiction. Don't give hope. Don't give up hope. My. And. Inshallah. Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala. Amin. Amin. Amin. Jazakum Allahu Khairan. Assalamu Alaikum Wa Rahmatullahi Wa Barakatuh.