Good morning, Millennials! Welcome back to the CH and happy CHES! Speaking of CHW, no, it's Jews Day! And speaking of Jews, I'm joined by a very proud one—hello, Jackie! Thank you so much for joining the show today; it's a pleasure and an honor to be here, per CH.

Oh, okay, not the pun! Not the pun! Not the [ __ ]! Jackie, you look like a big [ __ ] today. I feel uncomfortable—not because of being [ __ ], but I feel like they don't look right and they're bothering me. I'm actually going to put them behind my ears if you could bear with me.

Oh, so we're kind of going from a [ __ ] podcast to a more traditional one. Jackie's putting her [ __ ] strands away. Yeah, she's taking back, you know, her life of sin and she's moving forward in Christ. I love that!

No, it was just to my face! I can't live like that. I need a clean workspace to do my thing—no distractions. I'mma do my thing! Bang! That was such a crazy song! Why? That album was actually extremely good.

Yeah, what is the song that opens the movie Trainwreck? I know it's from the Bangers album. Yes, is it not "Do My Thing"? No, it's not. I need to look at the name of the songs. I'll know it when I see it. It was such a perfect random—like, whoever did the soundtrack knew what the [ __ ] they were doing, you know?

It's true! I think you're right. I think it was "Do My Thing." It was! Yes, it was confirmed! Great, great little trivia for the morning.

Speaking of pop culture, you're looking like Kate Middleton today in your sweater.

I am looking like Kate Middleton today with my sweater! And don't forget my gorgeous luscious locks, of course! The locks! But the sweater is so, as they say, Kate Middleton C-coded.

Wait, something we didn't even really talk about is like a really sad side effect for anyone of chemotherapy is losing your hair. And Kate is really known for her hair—it's like famous! Her famous blowout! If that is a reality, that's so sad, you know?

Yeah, just something I want to mention. Thank you for mentioning that. Thanks for making the show sad! Sorry, back to me looking like Kate Middleton.

Yeah, it's Kate Middleton via Amazon. It's Kate Middleton if you ordered her through Wish. You know, it's giving "Teu Kate Middleton." It's fate! "Fiddletown!"

It's fate! The one who was denigrating it!

Oh yeah, that's my thing! Oh, you have to compliment me! I have to self-sabotage! Say something nice about me!

I just did! You look like Kate Middleton!

Say else!

Yeah, like just compliment something about me!

Oh wow, she's having a hard time! Okay, like I feel like I captured all the—like, okay, your hair looks so wonderful!

Thanks! It's a wig! Like, I always have to sort of insult myself while complimenting. I can't! No! And it's like, okay, someone says, "I love your shirt!" I literally be like, "It was a dollar!"

Yeah, so what's the need? Learn to stop doing that! Just say thank you!

Oh my God, thank you so much! I love your sweatshirt too!

No, no, no! You don't have to say another! You don't also have to deflect! Are you wearing my sweatshirt?

I am wearing your sweatshirt! It was in my closet!

Dirty little liar! 'Cause remember, you left it in my closet and I said, "This belongs to you!"

Yeah, you did! You were like, "Okay!" Then you never took it!

Well, enjoy! But here's the thing about accepting a compliment: I feel like even what you just said, you're still deflecting by giving someone a compliment back! Like, just sit with it! Accept the compliment!

No, and I had to immediately change the subject—like, back to your sweatshirt! Like, let's try one more time! And this is like an exposure therapy—very Huberman of us! Tell me you like something about it!

I like your sweater!

Thank you so much! But about—I like it too, you know? Thank you so much! It's really comfortable!

Yeah, okay, that good?

Yeah, I think that's what you're supposed to do!

So today's show, I'm so excited for! I think you and I both really did our research on today's episode because it's almost like this happens to us all the time where somebody whom, like, is very popular in culture but we don't really know much about them. The second we start talking about them, there's an article being written about them. It's almost like we're kind of like radioactive in that sense!

But that happened yesterday! Huberman, who's kind of been like a major topic of conversation here at The Toast, we've been implementing a lot of his wellness and self-help—literally not at all! We take a sip of water and say he sent us!

I don't know, I took Romeo out today and right when I woke up and I got my vitamin D and I'm feeling Huberman-esque!

Right, but it's like you still had to take your dog out!

Yeah, no, no! But we've just been talking about him a lot recently and the sort of—I don't even know what to call it—it was a cover story in New York Magazine!

It was, yeah! But it was like a moronic expose!

Yeah, sure! Expose on Huberman in the New York Magazine! Jackie and I both read it; everyone's talking about it and I cannot wait to dive in! I screenshotted some of my favorite parts 'cause they were so dumb!

And I just like—I want everyone to know, and I'm sure you all could have guessed this—hashtag I stand with Huberman!

Yeah, I did need to read it just to like make sure I still stand with Huberman because it's like some—make sure he wasn't accused of something like egregious!

Yeah, sometimes I see a hit piece and it's my reflex to want to defend the person just because that's the way things go! And so often it's a mountain out of a molehill and people are just being crucified! But every now and then there are like legitimate accusations, so you don't want to just like blindly defend!

Right, so I do need to like see the accusations to be able to speak on them and say comfortably I stand with Huberman! And like I wasn't even somebody who—like we talked about Huberman a lot! I swear, like I had no idea anything about him! He was a real scientist, professor! I just know he's like a girly with a podcast that talks about wellness!

Who doesn't? I thought it was seriously like he was an influencer! I had no idea of his accolades! And I'm sure this wasn't the point of the article! I'm a Huberman Stan! Like, I find his whole thing very impressive! He's a [ __ ] freak!

But like—and I was thinking about this yesterday—I feel like it's really common for sort of mainstream media to do big hit pieces never on someone who's like a media darling! It's always someone who's sort of like alternative, fringe, free thinker!

And I don't know what the point of these articles are! Is it to silence that person? Because I find more often than not they become bigger than ever! Like this article for me—like you, I had never even heard of Huberman! I never even felt compelled once in my life to listen to a podcast episode of his! I'm so not the target demo! But now I don't know, I'm like, "Oh, he's a [ __ ] freak!"

Yeah, now I'm like, "Wait, what was he saying about coffee before you wake up?" His wellness tips are so ubiquitous! They become ubiquitous! People just die for them! I'm intrigued!

So I don't know what the point of these articles are, but I feel like they're having the adverse effect! I feel like it's mainstream media's way of silencing someone who's kind of out there but someone who has a platform and is maybe using it not in the way that they want to see them using it!

And so I find that it just has the opposite effect! I think now people are so attuned to it that even obviously for us, we're hardened, so we read it like with a critical lens! But even when I was seeing some of the reactions from this article, like I think it is having the opposite effect for most people where it's like, "Oh, H is—yeah, right!"

That's just like the nature of life! Like you can't just cancel everyone! And so at first, I think like if you got canceled like in the late 2010s, like it had a major, major impact! And ever since then, it just sort of like a rite of passage for anyone with a platform! It doesn't really have the fallout that it used to have!

And honestly, if you haven't had even like a small scandal, you're kind of a nobody! Seriously!

Yeah, and it's crazy what they even got of Hu! And they went so far deep into his personal life! Like nobody—you know what it was reminding me of?

What? I hope that we're on the same page! I'm going to say it in 3, 2, 1!

But you—I'm not going to say it!

No, but I want you to say it!

I can't think that wide!

Tell me what it reminded you of! I'll tell you if I had that feeling!

I'll be honest, it reminded me of the article about Gary Noor!

It did not remind me of that!

Okay, that was even more innocuous! But—and if you want to dig so deep into someone, you will find like loser behavior about anyone! And then to make it like the grand sweeping thesis is like his private and his public—there's such a disparity! Can we trust what he's saying?

I'm glad you brought up the grand thesis because I literally screenshotted the last paragraph of the article! It was like the girl did all this dumb research and she like didn't know how to land the plane! She didn't know how to be! So she made it about like female friendship! It was so stupid!

Like, yeah, okay, you know what? Let's sidebar that! That is our story!

Is that not even the biggest story of the day?

Is the biggest story of the day the bridge?

No, let's just talk about that really quick! Horrible! Like, woke up—oh my God! Sending so much love to our Baltimore toasters! Like, how scary that video! That was so scary!

That video is so scary! They're still doing the search and rescue mission! There's still six people missing!

That's seven! I feel like that's everyone's worst nightmare when they're going over a bridge and it feels like this just sort of like far-off thing that's never going to happen! But it's like this crazy thing we all think and it's people's like actual nightmare coming to fruition!

It is so scary!

MH, I don't know who to be angry at!

Mhm! Like, what the [ __ ] happened with the boat? Did he back into it?

No, it was the front! To me, in the video, it looked a little bit like a back end!

Seen pictures of the wreck? Like, you could see aerial pictures from daytime! Now you could see it was the front of the boat! And by the way, thank God it wasn't like 7 a.m. rush hour! It was dark out! So I think there could have been way more people on the bridge!

But there were also construction workers! Like, oh my God! Horrible!

Yeah, well, I think we'll have answers soon as to what happened! But it appears as though like the power went out on the cargo ship! But then also, I guess I never really thought like there are cargo ships going under bridges that we drive on!

I don't love that! I didn't know that! I've never seen a cargo ship under like the 59th Street Bridge or the Manhattan one! Manhattan Bridge or like any of the Manhattan Bridges!

The Manhattan! But the world needs to operate! Like, ports are like—ports and bodies of water need a bridge!

I don't know! I just didn't know that! Am I the only one? I never thought about it!

So wait, what was the big story of—you're teasing P Diddy!

Oh right, right, right! Yes, that's a big story! It is a big story! And I was talking to you about this this morning! It's really hard not to keep falling into conspiracy theory traps about P Diddy!

There's so much misinformation on Twitter, like on all social media! I cannot figure out what is real and what is fake!

Yeah, because people are making jokes! People are making a—I want to see—say misinformation! CU! It's just like theories! And I feel like whenever you talk about sex trafficking and then like a wider ring, it definitely is bigger than some of the facts that we know right now!

But then people just start to like theorize and start pulling from a million different things and not all of it is true! I would say most of it is probably not! But it's just like theories! And it's like, wait, so what's true, what's fact right now, and what's just being theorized about?

Right! And it reminds me a lot of Epstein where like so many celebrities' names were in the Epstein docs! And I would say half of them were completely innocently in there! They had no correlation to Epstein and EP's Island pedophilia!

And now it's like names are floating! And I just saw a thing in Page Six about Prince Harry being in some of the documents!

Yeah, one he was mentioned once! And we'll talk about it in the story to sort of say what's being said!

It is mostly like nothing burger-ish! But I'm sure he's having a hard day!

I'm sure he's freaking—not a good week for Prince Harry!

No, no! So juicy story is for a Tuesday! You know we're going up on a Tuesday!

Yeah, it's always the Tuesday! You never see it coming! It's almost like we've been chosen!

We didn't choose this Tuesday! We didn't choose this life! Jackie, it chose us!

That's true! That is true!

Okay, let's get into it because there's a lot to discuss!

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Thank you, Claudia!

Oh, before we dive in, I did have a brief update on the 5K!

Okay! I think I'm gonna—I think I—I think I'm gonna be able to swing it! Like, I have to!

What changed?

Well, I was just sitting here thinking like I literally have a running appointment today! I'm like, I did put in all this work! What's holding me back? First, it's S's birthday! I did get approval from the one and only snitch to it!

She honestly—I was hoping she would be a little bit more upset! She didn't seem that upset! She also, I think, knows if I miss it, like I'll have to get her a better birthday present! So I think, you know, it's a win-win for everyone!

Wow! So she was okay with it then?

I asked Ben if he would run it with me 'cause I'm not running it alone, of course! He said yes! And I also invited Josh to run it with me! Did he answer me?

Oh, he said, "I'm obviously in, BB! I'll sign us all up!"

Yeah, I mean, you ditched me! Like, we've been training for this! I could say you ditched me, went over to the good guys, didn't even bat an eyelash!

I think we're going to have to call ourselves The Good Guys and Dolls after everything they've done to us!

Why don't you just be happy that I'm not running this 5K alone like a loser?

Okay, I never thought you were running it alone! I never was going to!

So, um, that'll be fun!

No, yeah! I was like kind of looking forward to not having to train anymore!

No, the training is fun! I feel like even if nothing came of it, like it was just a good thing that we were doing! And we got so much stick! And I am—I’m going to do it! Like, I'm signing up! I'm going to tell, you know, the peeps that I'm like, "Count me in plus two!"

Okay, I'm happy for you! Keep me posted!

Yeah, yeah! Okay, let's get into the stories!

First up, Diddy's LA and Miami homes were raided by the feds in connection with a sex trafficking investigation yesterday!

So, Sha Diddy comes—homes in LA and Miami were raided by Homeland Security on Monday in possible connection with an ongoing sex trafficking investigation! Federal law enforcement agents were seen arriving to the rapper's properties with guns drawn in the lavish homey Hills neighborhood of LA and in Miami, as seen in video obtained by Fox 11!

In another video captured by TMZ, federal agents could be seen swarming his California property while multiple helicopters hovered from above! A few people were taken out in handcuffs, including one of his sons! The other people's names have yet to be officially revealed! Along with, at the time, Diddy's whereabouts were unknown, but he was spotted yesterday at an executive airport in Miami!

There also were then rumors that like his jet—which, you know, as we were talking about recently in regards to Taylor Swift—that his jet can be tracked! And they say he's fleeing the country, but there's no proof of that!

Like, so there was—I think he has two planes! One of them landed in Miami yesterday with him, and another one was flying like from LA to the Caribbean! H, which is definitely weird! Like, what was on that plane? Documents? People? Etc., etc.!

I don't think he would leave the country while his son is in custody!

Now, of course, what does this remind you of?

I know you're going to say Jake Paul!

But it doesn't! It reminds me of Jake Paul because we had aerial footage of—was it Homeland Security or like the feds? The FBI raiding his house? Guns? People coming out? And it was the craziest thing of all time! And the way nothing happened after that! Like, he basically got swatted as a prank! You know they do that?

What the hell was the sort of wrap-up there? Nothing?

I don't know! Today I don't care because we're talking about this! But I'm saying allegations connected to this from Cassie that we had spoken about a few weeks ago!

Also, Kid Cudi—uh, Lil—I need to find his name! His name is like Rodney! He's the one leveling charges against Diddy! He had worked with him! And there's a lot of different charges!

So there are stories here and charges and there's information here! It's all related to sex trafficking charges, like sexual harassment, the physical abuse that Cassie had detailed! And then this person, Rodney, he was a producer with Diddy, has like a whole trove of sordid tales!

Yeah, and there have been like people in the last month—there's been a lot of news coming out about Diddy! And people have been—50 Cent has been posting about it non-stop on his Instagram! Like, people in the industry have sort of been hinting at something major to come in like this big sort of, you know, network of, you know, whatever!

And it feels like we might be on the precipice of like what we thought was going to happen with Epstein! Remember? Like the list? The list! And that never happened! Nobody sang for their supper! He, you know, killed himself in prison or whatever!

Oh my God, I'm sorry! I keep going on tangents! The craziest part of this movie that I saw—I'm sorry! I know I keep going back to it—the movie that I saw over the weekend, which is about Nicholas Winton, the guy who saved over 600 Jewish lives! The Ghislaine Maxwell of it all! Her father, which we all know who is Ghislaine Maxwell—she's like this, uh, he's like kind of like a Rupert Murdoch big media! Him and his wife were the ones who discovered Nicholas Winton and his scrapbook and made the story what it was!

When they said Robert Maxwell, I was like, "Ben, do you know who that is?" Like, he didn't appreciate it!

The Ghislaine Maxwell of it all! Totally random! Sorry, back to what I was saying! Is that interesting?

Yeah! Like, you know, they said when Jeffrey Epstein—the Epstein Island—we were finally going to find out who all the pedophiles in Hollywood were! That never happened! But it does sound like it feels also like this Diddy thing is going to like crack open this big sort of ring of abuse!

Yeah, you would hope that it would! But I don't think that it will! I feel like if Ghislaine Maxwell and Jeffrey Epstein could be tried and—and for Ghislaine, convicted of sex trafficking and not one person, one client—how can you charge someone with that without actually like having the people who did it?

Then this, to me, this feels like an even smaller version of it! I don't think it's going to go past Diddy! I really don't!

But I do think that client list—I feel like it's more protected than this! It's like a political class! It's not famous people! It was like I feel like the one person who really came out—we knew he was a pedophile—two actually, Prince Andrew and Bill Clinton! Like literally, those aren't celebrities! Those are like former presidents! A prince! Those are people who actually are a protected class!

I think they're like the almighty! When people talk about like, you know, they like—it's those types of people! You know what I mean? Whereas I feel like if there's anyone connected to this sort of human trafficking abuse ring that I feel like is going to come out with Diddy, it's more so celebrities who are definitely, you know, privileged and, you know, get special treatment!

But not like a protected class completely! And I feel like often the law tries to make an example out of celebrities maybe! But I think that like Diddy is on that level of like global elites where yes, some of them are politicians or like dignitaries! But there are a few really big-name celebrities in there!

And I think—I just—I don't know! If it didn't happen with Epstein and the island, the seizure island and the logs, they have everything and the documentaries, I don't know what more is going to happen here! I feel like it's just going to be about Diddy and the work—like what he did and the toxic work culture that he fostered!

I don't think it's going to go into like global sex trafficking ring scale! I don't think this is the one!

Damn! I'm just like waiting for that! Anyone else? Everyone is like—people have really—and I feel like people have not dropped the torch on like Jeffrey did not kill himself! Like what the hell is going on? What happened? What are the names? Like where are the convictions?

But like these are very powerful people!

No, it's true! And it's like how do we know that Prince Andrew and Bill Clinton like went to the island and were pedophilic?

Yeah, like it's so weird! No, the Epstein thing—like everybody—well, not everybody! Like the commoners, we did not drop the ball! The government, whoever was in charge, the Attorney General, whatever, dropped the ball!

Yeah! Now the plane going to the Caribbean is weird!

It is weird! It's giving Grand Cayman! You know?

Yeah, it's giving extradition!

So yeah, this is clearly a developing story!

It's a developing story and TBD if it has more to do with this global sex trafficking ring or if it's more so about like Diddy's world that he's cultivated with Cassie and Rodney and just like a really—and if you read some of the allegations of like, you know, like sexual abuse, handcuffing, and also human trafficking—like forcing people to have sex with other people!

The other thing is like sometimes these charges can be confusing because you're right! It's either like Diddy's a freak and has this like weird past or it's like this ring of, you know, abusers!

And sometimes like when you like take someone across state lines, like that's considered trafficking! It's confusing what the charges actually mean!

No, what to what degree? Because trafficking is trafficking and making someone do something against their will and holding them prisoner—like that's human trafficking! But it's like how big is it?

Right! When I think human trafficking, I think what we all think, which is like this sort of underground system!

Yeah, big network! Big network!

So I don't know! But when I—you know, I feel like we all, especially if you're really into pop culture, like it's so easy to like end up down rabbit holes, blind items, like over the years! And you really do feel like Hollywood is this ring of pedophiles! Like that's just kind of—it's so easy to get there!

And there's proof! Like there really is! And things like this like really—you're like the inner, you know, blind item girl in me is like, "Oh, this is it!"

Yeah, yeah! The dominoes are falling into place! And I never would have thought that like Diddy was at the helm of it!

I don't know who I would have thought was! I have some ideas!

Yeah, like I feel like from the—you can't say! If you read the blinds, we were in that compliance meeting in 2017, so like we can't say! But like there are some big names that are just—can you text me who you think it would be?

Yeah, I feel like—who I think is not who you're—who would be top of mind for you?

I feel like he really gets away unscathed!

I feel like—okay, let me see who Jackie is saying!

But then by way—okay, this is the name that I think of first!

Oh my God! That's what I was going to say! Because we think of the same blind item! This terrible story!

Right! Okay, yes! But then here's another name that people always throw around! But he wasn't so much in the blind, so for me, I don't feel as connected to it! But people really think this is the one!

Oh yeah! By the way, he's the one you think!

Hold on! Sorry that this is annoying! But we can't just like be slinging names!

No! And I would also love—is it really? She is?

Yes! Yes!

So, um, is it slanderous to what? Like ask people to sound off in the comments like who they think of?

I don't think I—it's like not right! I don't think it is!

Okay, here's the thing! When you think of like this sort of like underground, devil, demonic—like when you go down that conspiracy, what celebrities do you like come to mind for you to be being at that helm of this ring of pedophilia and human trafficking?

Yeah, yeah! And then there are some that are more known and not celebrities, though!

Cracking up from our text! Like I feel like that's—you know, for the—I think this one is really the linchpin! What I just sent you!

Which I think everyone—what's linchpin mean?

Like the—of course! If it's a pyramid, it's number top of the pyramid!

Yeah, yeah, yeah! Like he started it!

But look! Wait! Look! I wrote one more thing!

It always is!

They always are!

Sorry, that was annoying of us! But like for my own house, I needed to have that conversation!

Yeah, guess we could have had the conversation and like cut it out! But why make more work for ourselves, right?

But also, so either like we've just read the same blinds, true, which is true! Or we all just think the same things and we all have seen the same things!

And like, is it possible—and I just have to ask this question, like the Devil's Advocate—is it possible that like this sort of theory we all have about Hollywood and the elites, like that it's like fake?

No, because then things like Quiet on Set come out and we feel like vindicated! Do you know what I mean?

Yeah, I think not fake! I think there's a degree of truth to it! But it's just like to what degree is it true?

Yeah, how—what percentage of Hollywood is it worse than we thought or is it smaller?

Yeah, that's what I think!

Okay, okay! So we will keep you abreast! We're not going to let this story—

Yes, we will!

Oh, and as it regards Prince Harry was mentioned in the filing because the producer, Lil Rod, Rodney Jones, said in court documents that guests were drawn to Diddy's alleged sex trafficking parties due to the rapper's quote access to celebrities such as famous athletes, political figures, artists, musicians, and international dignitaries like British royal Prince Harry!

No one else was named in that sentence! So like that's kind of rude!

No, it's really unfortunate! But I get what he was trying to say! Like these weren't just this kind of what we were saying before! These weren't just parties with like Hillary Duff! You know, it's another level of beyond celebrity! Even super celebrities! It's up there with the powerful people!

Yes, yes! And attracted to those parties for those reasons! It's unfortunate! But I do feel like it's a perfect example! I think it makes—you know, I understood what Rodney was saying!

You know?

Yeah, yeah!

So sorry for Harry! But I think it was a necessary example!

Yeah, yeah! And by the way, if Harry was at a party—which, by the way, being at a party is not a crime unless it's like the theme is human trafficking! Like what are we dressing as?

Right! No, also a lot of celebrities are parties! And that's where we get these pictures where it's like a nefarious actor with a celebrity! And of course, maybe the celebrity is nefarious as well! But maybe they're just not! And they're just there being a dumb celebrity at a party!

That's why all those pictures like right at the height of Epstein, it was so easy to get like bogged down by like conspiracy theories! 'Cause all these pictures of Ghislaine Maxwell with every single celebrity! Like these Getty Images! And it was just—that's how these moronic parties work!

And if Ghislaine is like a rich woman, so she's a host of this party and it's benefiting a charity, every celebrity's got to take a picture with Ghislaine! So it was really unfortunate for a lot of people who were probably innocent having their pictures with Ghislaine all over the internet! Like that sucks!

Yeah! Well, our next story—someone else who's the talk of the town today—Andrew Huberman! As we said, a magazine article called "Andrew Huberman's Mechanisms of Control: The Private and Public Seductions of the World's Biggest Pop Neuroscientist" dropped yesterday!

And it was a deep dive into Mr. Huberman himself! What he practices and what he preaches and the disparity between the two! Did you—I up until the middle thought that this was a piece that Huberman like sat for! And it wasn't until she said what his rep—his rep had responded to some charges!

I thought it was just crazy that there was this big piece and I thought he sat for that portrait that was on the cover!

Anyone else?

No, that's his artwork that has just been distorted!

But the vibe I got—maybe I'm wrong—but I think this reporter started as a big fan of Huberman!

Oh, and was listening to episodes and became really interested in Huberman and then wanted to write an article about him and started digging into him and found this thread that she then went off on!

Okay, so I feel like at the beginning I thought that might have been it too! But no, I think that this group of five women—it ends up being about these five women who all connected because they realized at the same time they were in quote-unquote monogamous relationships with Andrew Huberman! They were all having unprotected sex with him and now they're like best friends! Female friendship wins the Barbie movie, essentially!

And I feel like they took their story to someone and then this woman sort of backtracked and wrote this whole article from beginning to end! But the whole point of the article was these five women! The last three paragraphs were literally like female friendship runs through the invisible string! They're best friends! They have this group chat! There's 100 messages a day! They're going to meet in real life and do getaways together! Camp Toast!

Like, yeah, I felt like they had this story! They knew this sort of salacious thing about a very famous person and they took it to a journalist and she wrote an article about it! That's how I felt!

Okay, but the journalist is also saying that at one point she listened to the podcast and has been implementing Huberman tips into her everyday life! It's the biggest podcast in the world! That's not shocking to me that someone who works in media would have listened to it!

Yeah! So—and then obviously—and she like—I think she got this story and she made it personal like a good journalist would, you know?

Yeah! So here's the tale that she is telling! She talks about Huberman, the story that he sells, and then what's really going on with him!

Here's one paragraph that seems to sum up what she's trying to say! She said, "Huberman sells a dream of control down to the cellular level, but something has gone wrong! In the midst of immense fame, a chasm has opened between the podcaster preaching dopamine restraint and a man with newfound wealth with access to a world unseen by most professors! The problem with a man always working on himself is that he may also be working on you!"

So at first when I read the article, I was like, "Oh, that's actually kind of an interesting take!" Like—and I feel like we talked about this with J Shett! Like when your whole thing is minimalism and self-peace and [ __ ] like that! But then you're officiating JLo and Ben Affleck's wedding! How does that sort of monk lifestyle of nothingness and the celebrity lifestyle of everythingness—how do you, you know, merge the two?

So at first I thought, I'm like, "You know, that's kind of like an interesting take!" But then it became very clear that it was just about this woman, Sarah! And I had screenshotted a few things!

So basically, Sarah was sort of the major player out of these five women who he was seeing at the same time and having unprotected sex with! That was kind of his biggest crime! I think the article tried to make it seem like, you know, being a cheater isn't, you know, the most ethical thing, but it's not a crime!

But having unprotected sex with women who trust you is definitely an ethical gray area! It's not the right thing to do!

Yeah, it's just really crazy that I'm reading about Huberman's condom usage in New York Magazine!

Like, yeah, it's something about—to me, it's like this is not my plate! This is not my business! But it became abundantly clear to me that like there was a lot of stretching and reaching going on in this article when I read this line!

Mhm! Sarah's relationship with Andrew began in February 2018 in the Bay Area where they both lived! He messaged her on Instagram and said he owned a home in Piedmont, a wealthy city separate from Oakland! That turned out not to be precisely true! He lived off of Piedmont Avenue, which was in Oakland!

Okay, that reminded me of Gary! Remember they said Gary didn't live in Ohio? He lived in Cleveland or whatever?

No! Like, okay, by the way, people lie about where they live all the time! Like you live a little close to the Upper Side! You're like, "I live on the Upper Side!"

Like, my God! Literally, I live five blocks away from the Upper East Side! I'm on the Upper East Side after all!

And the lies didn't stop there, Lally! It was Lennox Hill! Like, it's not a big deal to like sort of fudge the area that you live in! Like, of course, everybody's always going to say they live in the nicer part of town!

Like, yeah! No, so that's like what kicks off his string of lies! And the next nefarious act that he does is he's flaky!

So Huberman is a flake!

No, it's clear that he's like one of these all-powerful men! Like almost, um, I feel like when you're nerdy, I feel like you can go a couple of ways! And when you get really famous for being nerdy, like I feel like I could totally see you becoming a [ __ ] monster!

Like who doesn't honor time commitments and who's rude! And there was a lot about his flakiness! But a lot about his dog!

Oh yeah! But you know what it was reminding me of? This article! It was reminding me a little bit about Elon!

When I was—what I was going to say! Elon's book and some of his quirkier behavior, I guess you would say! And then it reminded me of what he said on SNL! Like, "I'm a genius! You didn't think I was actually going to be a cool guy too?"

Like, there—by the way, there's obviously an element of like Asperger's when it comes to Elon!

Correct! Yes!

Right? Like you can't be everything to everyone all at once! You can't be the smartest person in the world constantly working and working on like literally eight world-changing companies and also just be like a cool guy to be around!

Right! And like grab a beer with! Favorite guy!

So I think that was becoming clear at the beginning of the article! Like he takes himself so seriously! He's obviously really, really smart! He acts like an ass because he thinks he can!

Like he's someone I would literally never pursue a friendship or a relationship with! But he sounds like a nightmare!

Nightmare! But it's always the people who are like, yeah, you would think like Huberman has all of his protocols for ways to live your best life physically, mentally! I get on the best page!

So yeah, I guess you might be surprised to find out that he's not perfect in his real life!

It's Tony Robbins!

Yeah, but Tony Robbins was actually accused of like a little bit more of a—I don't remember exactly, but it was like, you know, the really toxic workplace, sexual harassment in the workplace!

Nothing here is illegal of what he—like he's just being accused of being like a flaky cheater freak! Honestly, like big-time loser!

So—but then there was like this thread through the article where he was too obsessed with his dog! And I was like, okay, that's also not a crime! I don't know why we're including this in the article!

Are the AL—like they didn't have that much! Because him caring about his dog—listen to this! When they were together, he was buzzing, anxious! He's like, "Oh, my dog needs his blanket this way!" And I'm like, "Your dog is just laying there super cozy! Why are you being weird about the blanket?"

I literally wrote a note! Ben! Ben! Like the dogs are fine! And Ben is fussing with them non-stop! Is that article worthy? I don't think so!

No, that's me with Brew! His heating pad's not turned up to the level that he wants!

Yeah, sure! He's okay! But he could be cozier! You got to fuss with the ones you love! It's called maturing, innit?

I do it with Brew!

It sounds psychotic! Like Huberman's just like, you know, uh, what's the word? Like laring with his dog!

Yes! So then we get to the part of the article where he actually starts to do things that are unethical! Like cheating on his partner!

So Sarah is the main girl! And I'm sure that's not her real name!

So this is when she discovers him cheating in August 2021! Sarah says she read Andrew's journal and discovered a reference to cheating! She says she was gutted!

I hear you are saying you are angry and hurt! He texted her that same day! I will hear you as much and as long as needed for us!

So you're at a point in a relationship where you're reading your man's journal! Like, which is so invasive!

Now I feel like this is going to be probably my hottest take of the article! And I want to preface also! I want to say it as a reference to cheating! Like what is like hardcore? I'm cheating on her!

And also, was he not being honest in his journal? 'Cause it turns out he's dating like four people at the same time! Is he—is that what you saw? The truth, right? Or do you see like—is he lying in his journal?

And so by the way, the next year she discovers him cheating again! And it's because she's snooping through his phone!

So this is obviously a relationship with no trust! And I hate this is—I don't know how to phrase this in a way where people aren't going to be like, "Claudia, you're a misogynist!" or that you're victim-blaming!

Because if the rules were reversed, you'd say that a man doing it to a woman, right? But I don't think it's like—I don't think it could be considered victim-blaming! He wasn't abusive! He was just a [ __ ] freak!

But it's like this is a woman! And by the way, Sarah has two kids! After she finds out he's cheating, after she claims that he would go on, you know, days where he was so angry! Like he was obviously like a terrible, terrible partner and boyfriend and just person, honestly!

She takes her two kids and she moves in with him! She moves her whole family out to Malibu! Especially when a lot of his anger was about her children!

She said he would get—she said having a second child was a big mistake! And he'd be really angry about that!

So you stay with this person and you move in with him with your children! And the whole time in the article, they maintain that Sarah is a successful independent woman! She's a huge feminist! She's not someone who can be easily manipulated!

Like they sort of maintain that like she's not a victim! She's this sort of all-powerful woman!

So you're in this years-long toxic relationship with a man who says your children are a mistake, who has cheated on you! You've now discovered who gave you an STD because you were like, "I thought we were not having sex with other people! I just have tested positive for HPV!"

Yes! So she was only having sex with him! He said he was monogamous too! She never had HPV before! And then she tests positive for HPV!

And so I just feel like there needs to be like accountability on all parts! Like the thesis from this article is like Andrew Huberman is a [ __ ] freak! Absolutely! Everyone should stay away from him in regards to romantic and working relationships!

Seriously! I would literally—like he sounds like a nightmare! That is fact! That is!

But like what is Sarah doing? Like what is Sarah doing? And like I don't know if it's like so crazy that I'm saying this! 'Cause I just feel like there are equal parts blame to lay on everyone!

Like—and these other women, we don't really hear from the other four! Just that like he would see them, you know, for periods of time monogamously! But then it turned out that he wasn't monogamous! They didn't sort of have as with him!

Right! They didn't have a main role in the article! He would fly them out! But it was really Sarah! Sarah was sort of the main—his main girl!

And I just—I couldn't gather—I couldn't wrap my head around the author saying this is a powerful, smart, successful feminist, independent woman who moves her two children in with a man who has cheated on her and who apparently goes on days-long angry rants!

Right! And goes missing for days! And I don't know! Something wasn't adding up!

And the thing is, all of this is told from Sarah's account! Huberman did not sit down for this article! He responded to certain things!

Yeah! And they—she like hard—like straight up denied them! And at a certain point, it's kind of like he said, she said!

There were also things that Huberman said that were in quotations! Like that Sarah said Huberman said! And they are in quotations!

So were they said over text? Or how do you have a quote of that? A lot of it was also transcribed to podcast, which I found almost illegible!

But Sarah will say like, "We got into an argument and he said this!"

Yeah! How do you have a quotation of what someone said unless it was—oh, they're all text messages! In which case, the author should have said, "I saw that the text message said this!"

I don't know! I just feel like it's very telling that this was like a, you know, a basically first-person description from Sarah!

So we don't even have—and there are two sides to every story! And I think, you know, there's her truth, his truth, and the version of the truth! That's always the case!

This is her truth! I don't find it that compelling on her behalf! And we haven't even heard from Huberman in terms of how he says things went down!

He comes back and says, "No, that never happened!" or "No, that was in 2021, not 2022!" But we don't have his account of things!

No! And even there was one point where she says they were together and she saw him cheating on someone—cheating on her with someone—like on the couch in his living room! He lives in a glass house!

You see the third time! And so then she left! She took a picture of the woman's car just to like try and find her afterwards but couldn't find her!

He's like, "Okay!" And he says at that time that they were not together!

Which they shouldn't be together after everything else that went wrong between them!

So it's like say they're not together and she walks to his house! It's like Peeping Tom! Peeping through his window! Like taking pictures! Running PL! Running plates!

No! She sounds like a crazy person from a movie! From a book!

Yeah! Okay, also another line that I was just like, "Oh, they really need things in private!" He could seem less concerned about patriarchy!

Because like she—the journalist spoke to a lot of women and he liked, you know, sex that was, you know, I would say traditionally heterosexual! You know, submissive woman, man in charge! Very much some of the novels that I read!

And so even though on his podcast—sorry, look at him! What do you think he likes?

Of course! Of course!

J, he looks like a caveman! And like so on his podcast, he preaches about patriarchy! But in the bedroom, he slaps a woman's ass!

Like, I'm sorry! I think actually two things can be true at once! I'm sorry! But why are we reading this? Like this is not our business!

So the whole article is really trying to make it seem like he's the sort of master manipulator! And I actually—you know what? I'm sure he is!

But the article ends—and when I—the article ended this way, and I will read it to you! It was so deeply unserious!

The—I don't even think the name Andrew Huberman was in the last three paragraphs! It's about these women!

On any given day, one of the five women can go into an appointment and come back to a hundred texts from the group chat! Someone shared a Reddit thread in which a commenter claimed Huberman had a stable full of hoes!

And another responded, "I hope he thinks of us more like Care Bears!" At which point they assigned themselves Care Bear names!

Quote, "You're the only girl I let come to my apartment!" Read a meme someone shared under it!

It was a yellow lab looking extremely skeptical! They regularly Ed his usual response to explicit photos! M to comment on pictures of one another's pets!

They are holding space for other women who might join! Quote, "This group has radicalized me!" Sarah tells me! Quote, "There has been so much processing!" Unquote!

They are planning a weekend together this summer! Quote, "It could have been sad or bitter," says Eve, another woman! "We didn't jump in as besties, but real friendships have been built! It has been, in a strange and unlikely way, quite a beautiful experience!"

What's so crazy? That's the end of this page-long, pages-long article!

This is a real-life version of our favorite movie, Barbie!

The Other Woman!

Oh, The Other Woman! Yeah, yeah!

But I don't know why when The Other Woman did it, it wasn't annoying!

No, 'cause like she saw he was cheating and then she set out to ruin his life! Not like moved in with him! Knew exactly that he was a dirty scoundrel!

Yeah! And then I don't know what had to happen here for her to finally be done with him unless he broke up with her!

Yeah, they never really even got to like the end of the relationship! Like how it ended!

Yeah! And when then also the author then goes into his backstory because he tells this tale—this is how she sums it up—of his life! Childhood! Of his childhood and the things that sort of built him!

So he said—she said, "For the past three years, one of the biggest podcasters on the planet has told a story to millions of listeners across half a dozen shows! There was a little boy, and the boy's family was happy until one day the boy's family fell apart! The boy was sent away! He found therapy! He found science! He found exercise! And he became strong!"

So that's sort of his origin story! His parents divorced! His parents were—he said, of course, they neglected him! Like full neglect!

Yeah! And I think he got into a bit of trouble! He was sent to like a hardening school for a month!

For a month! There he found therapy, which kind of opened up his world! And he found science and exercise and whatnot!

And she also says then there's a version of Huberman's story, which is also the truth, where it's like his father was a Stanford professor! He was born in Stanford Hospital! And he grew up to be a Stanford professor!

Like, it's not his mom—like his mom was an author! He grew up like, you know, not—it's not a hard life the way we would see it! You know, compared to someone else!

Like absent of privilege! But he never said he came from impoverished circumstances or anything!

And so when he was in high school, he started getting into trouble! You know, he was kind of acting out after his parents' divorce! And they ended up sending him away for a month!

And she interviewed people who were in his high school and were like, "Well, we never saw him getting into fights or getting into any trouble, so I don't know what they're talking about!"

And I feel like that's not necessarily proof that he wasn't going through hard times! I feel like a lot of the times when kids are going through hard things, like most of it happens at home!

And they present like a normal-facing life when they go to school!

Literally! You talked to a couple people from high school! They don't know what the [ __ ] they're worried about! Themselves! They're not there to be a historian for one classmate who they never expect 30 years later is going to become a big deal!

Then she did try to infer that he might not have ever been sent away because Huberman wouldn't share his representative—wouldn't share with the journalist what the name of the facility was called!

And you know, whatever the reason might be! Either maybe he didn't go to a facility or he just didn't want her digging around in this place for things about him!

Like why give her a lead on a story? Figure it out yourself!

Like you can!

And she sort of inferred—or she didn't say it, but she sort of left it like it's, you know, could be true! It doesn't sound like he went to a facility! It could be a lie, is what she said!

Yeah, yeah! That he's a liar!

And so I think with the JY thing, which this reminded me of, they had a lot of concrete proof that like when he said he wasn't in India, he actually was posting YouTube videos in North London!

Like there was actual proof that he had, you know, been either confused or, you know, not telling the truth about his background!

She—you can't for a certain say that! That's like one of the rules of journalism! Like you have to—but she didn't say it! She's just being dishonest and leaving it hanging there!

She also tried to come for his lab at Stanford and say it's like a couple classrooms on the second floor of a bill!

Like what? And then Stanford like put out a statement saying like, "No, this is a functioning lab and we're actually moving it to another building!"

Yeah! And she also had said at the beginning that his lab was so popular, people come and visit! Tours! They have authorized personnel only stickers on all the doors so fans don't come!

So in the beginning of the article, there is a lab! But then later on, she questions whether the lab ever existed!

And it's just a bunch of mice being sprayed running around!

Right! Now I don't know where I end with this because I really don't know Huberman! Like I'm not going to die on the stake for him!

But I do feel like I read this account and really the whole article was Sarah's account of this relationship! And I don't really think Sarah came out looking that favorable!

So it makes me think like once you hear someone else's side of the story, the truth is a version in the middle!

Yeah! So I'm hearing your version and it's not even that compelling!

Yeah! And I see gaps for where he could be like, "No, this is what happened!" and "This is where we thought we were at!"

I just think Huberman is a guy who's really smart with a popular podcast who's a [ __ ] freak, weirdo, ass loser!

Like seriously! I don't know if that's—I don't know if that's worthy of an article of the cover of New York Magazine!

Especially given how much is going on in the world currently!

Right! I just don't think—I didn't think it was, you know, it was a long article! And I read the whole thing and I was bored by it!

I was! It was really long! And there was so much podcast transcription, which I didn't really—I get that she was trying to make a point!

Every time she transcribed a part of his podcast, she would find something where he said, "I like cheese!" And then she would tell a story from Sarah where he said he didn't like cheese!

Just basically the whole thesis being the person you see on the podcast is not the person you see in real life!

And I feel like that's fine! I feel like that's fine too! Especially because there's no—there was nothing that said like this stuff that he's sharing is—oh, they tried to come for AG1 though!

Oh my God! I'm so glad you brought that up!

There's nothing that says that the stuff that he's sharing like isn't actually really beneficial! And people are changing their lives because of it! And like that's a net positive thing!

So how can we go and ruin it and ruin this person?

Of course! Right! But the one discrepancy is that he does ads for AG1!

And then there are other people who are saying that AG1 doesn't have enough of the vitamins and minerals that they claim to have!

Did I screenshot that?

Because she sent it to you!

Oh, then yes! She said that, you know, another thing against him is that he—I think one of his biggest sponsors for every episode is AG1!

And she said, "It is something to hear someone who sells himself as a Stanford University scientist just back from the lab proclaim that the $79 a month powder covers all your foundational nutritional needs!"

So she said in an industry not noted for its integrity, AG1, according to writer and professional debunker Derek Baris—

So, um, how is a writer and professional debunker? His word more valuable than a scientist, first of all!

And by the way, I don't know the science behind AG1! I just think like that's not an equal thing!

And I just feel like with doctors—like because I find this way—I feel this way about OIC! Like you can find a doctor to say whatever you want!

Like I see doctors on social media doing podcast interviews saying one thing about OIC and then another doctor saying the exact opposite on a podcast about it! They're both doctors!

Yeah! No, you really can find someone to say anything that you want! And it could be a doctor who went to a good school! Like it's not—and this guy isn't even a doctor! He's a professional debunker! That's not a job!

Right! And so he said that AG1 is not what it doesn't have the benefits that he claims to have!

Oh, therefore like Huberman's saying, "Please! Like I can't! I can't!"

Yeah! It was a lot! It was such a—like it was the stretch of her arm hurts!

I'm sure one from all the typing!

Well, for alling! It was so unnecessarily long! And I was just waiting for the big bombshell! I'm like, "What did he do?"

Well, the one like the craziest allegation to me in terms of, you know, okay, I'm in the weeds on his personal life now is like that day where he's flying in one girl!

Yeah! Texting with another girl! Sending meeting coffee! Eve for coffee!

Literally the juggling is—and maybe that's because his tips are so useful! He optimizes his life! Optim—time!

He's optimized! He thinks he's like a prophet! He has this obvious like superiority complex! He thinks he's godlike!

And that's how these freaks, especially men, behave!

Yeah! Also, the way that he speaks! Like, you know, turbo therapy speak!

He's the example of someone who really shows like maybe therapy is not for everyone! And there is such thing as too much therapy!

And you don't have to be going into therapy your entire life! Look what happens!

Like this is what he said to someone! "I'm willing to do the repair work on this! Like if I want to fix this, I want to [Music] fix!"

No! Like I want to fix this! Five words!

Like this sucks! But doesn't deter my desire and commitment to see you and establish clear lines of communication and trust!

I'm sorry! I want to work on this! I want to work on things!

No! And you think he's so obsessive about productivity, he would use less words to save time!

Word salad! Yummy, yummy! Huberman edition!

No, no! Huberman is a [ __ ] freak!

I want to know who Eve the actress is!

Oh, of course! I do too!

I have something kind of crazy to say!

You think she's like community theater?

No, no, no! About who I thought it was!

Oh, I don't think you can say!

Oh, I have no proof! I just envisioned her in my head as this person!

Okay, here! I have zero, zero proof! It is 100% not true! But every time the person was talking, I'm like, "This sounds like Amber Heard!"

Oh, that's so funny! She came to mind for me too!

But based on what I've read about Amber Heard, especially from Elon's book, like this isn't—she doesn't fit the profile!

Okay, okay!

She doesn't fit the profile!

Like Amber Heard would never be like the second in this story!

They gave no clues as to who Amber was!

Like there's no Easter eggs that we can sort of figure out!

What did I say? Amber?

You said who Amber was!

They gave no clues as to who Eve was!

And clearly, Amber Heard likes an evil genius!

No, it could be her though!

I don't think Elon's evil!

No, for sure! I wouldn't—my boy like that crazy!

I enjoyed recapping that article immensely!

Yeah, that was fun! And I honestly—I didn't even know what Huberman—that he had all these credentials!

He's very a professor!

Yeah! And that he like does both! Get you a prof that can do both!

No, he's a freak! And I'm obsessed!

I just want to say that was the first time in my life I've said prof! And like what does it mean?

It's like Shand for professor! Some people like call their professors prof!

Who?

And I just want to say like I want to apologize because take it back! It was so wrong of me to say such a thing!

It was so disturbing! I've literally never heard that! And I didn't like the experience!

Okay, well, you have to learn when you try new things! I tried something new on and it wasn't for me!

And I wasn't being authentic to my true self!

Prof!

I thought it was sort of like an abbreviation for profit!

I'm like, "Oh, 'cause that he thinks he's a profit!"

That's better! Because also it's pro!

No, professor!

It's 100% pro!

Prof is profit! That's why I thought!

Okay, if you're someone who uses prof in daily—go away!

Go away!

Yeah, but is it proper pro or is it—but just by the way, maybe people don't say that!

I've never heard anyone say that!

Maybe people just write it!

Oh, for sure! But there's no period after when they say it!

I can't get bogged down in the mindset of losers! I really can't!

Also, who's like talking to their professor that much?

I literally couldn't run fast enough away from my professors!

You know what? If your professor was Huberman, could you imagine?

If my professor was like—I could see like a young impression with me becoming obsessed with him!

Of course! But that's the difference! Sarah, like they said a million times, was this accomplished, successful, smart, independent feminist mother of two!

Right! So either she wasn't or Huberman wasn't like this almighty powerful being!

And also, yeah, that raises a good point! Like if he was such a nefarious actor, like he has students!

Like, right? He has—I just think if he was like that crazy awful, there would be—when you do an article like this and you do research into someone's background, there would be way more people—former students, former classmates, graduate, whatever—who would have come forward!

Not just five scorned ex-lovers!

No! Like the worst thing that he does in his life is that he's like flaky and tardy! And he didn't take the camping trip when he said they were going to go camping!

The camping trip!

Imagine if every time like if there was an article about you and it was like Claudia said that she was going to go to the Berkshires and we never went to the Berkshires!

Like, oh, but that was weird when the guy like spent his own money getting scuba certified!

Like that is so mean!

Like Huberman's such a dick!

But also like what is this guy doing?

Like no, the moral of the story is like I don't want to hang out with Huberman! I don't want to talk to Huberman! I don't want to date Huberman!

But he still can have a successful podcast!

Yeah! Two things can be true!

Yeah! And I could imagine myself listening to this podcast being like, "Oh my God, this guy's insufferable!"

No! Especially if he talks on his podcast the way these texts are!

I don't know how so many people listen to that!

I know! And by the way, did you see Spotify just released their—they never released their numbers! But they did just release what the top subscribed shows to subscribe to shows are!

Which really is kind of like a meaningless figure! You can have a ton of subscribers and nobody listens to your podcast!

But a bunch of people listen to your podcast, but they just don't subscribe! So it kind of is a meaningless number!

But Huberman is like officially the number two podcast!

Oh no! He was number three after TED Talks!

But I don't like to consider like the Daily and NPR or all of these—I don't like to consider them actual competitors!

I think it's more impressive like to be a billion-dollar media company when it's—yeah, you better have the biggest podcast!

So I think of like Joe Rogan, Huberman! Like people starting their own stick! So impressive!

And Huberman was right behind Joe Rogan!

Well, I think that makes sense because I think a lot of Huberman's audience came from Joe Rogan who already listened to podcasts on Spotify because he like goes on Joe Rogan so often!

I think it was too!

Yeah! Huberman was right!

Huberman was just like an idea to me! And I'm glad to know that actually what I thought Huberman was is what he does! Talking about sunlight, drinking water, to magnetic energy!

Okay, but what is he saying about coffee? The video that was—what was the thesis?

You don't drink coffee or do drink coffee?

Do drink coffee! But not immediately after you wake up!

He said minimum 10 minutes you have to go by after you wake up!

The [ __ ] drinks coffee within 10 minutes of waking up!

Within five!

Like a lot of people do it before they brush their teeth!

Pee! No, you pee, brush your teeth, and then you have to brew it! Like it takes a few minutes!

And I think like you should get your sunlight in before that! Something like that!

I don't think that's 10-minute thing is a real tip! 'Cause that's die duh!

Also, don't you roll over? And who wakes up immediately?

Yeah, yeah! I definitely think like the Huberman lifestyle is like probably not for us!

But I think a lot of it is actually pretty obvious based on what you're saying!

I think Huberman-ites wake up immediately though! Because I think like snoozing and scrolling on your phone is against Huberman productivity!

B for productivity!

And I agree with that! And like seeing like, you know, bad news!

Oh my God! We already over an hour! My—this is—we talked about Huberman for 40 minutes!

I can talk about more!

No, we did P Diddy! I forgot about that!

I'm not done with Huberman! I'm never going to be done with Huberman!

I'm never—look at the man!

Like never be done! My king right there!

No, I'm totally kidding!

No, but these are the unintended consequences of dumb [ __ ] journalism like that!

And it's like, aren't these journalists like embarrassed to be falling into this trope of like, "Oh, someone gets successful overnight! Let's go find their tweets and talk to an ex-girlfriend!"

Like don't you want to be taken seriously as a writer? 'Cause you're a joke now!

This kind of behavior gets rewarded in the world of journalism! And they do get taken seriously as writers in their own little world bubble!

So I'm sure it was a good day for the author! But I don't know! I was seeing like a lot of the—by the way, I didn't look, but the author was a woman!

Yes! I see her! Not that it matters! I just wanted to know!

Yeah! It felt like it was written by a woman! And I do mean that in a negative way!

No, it would have—I mean, it would be weird if a man wrote this like about women!

Like it's a women's voice! I think it's that it was written by a woman!

I agree! I was kidding!

Yeah! So that's the latest! We'll wait for Huberman to release a statement or a video!

I know! By the way, do you think—what is Huberman's PR strategy going to be? Like just on to the next?

He obviously—like the only place he would really say something is his podcast! He doesn't like seem like the type of person to release a statement on Instagram!

He—I don't know! It depends how much he cares about public opinion! If he's really like a renegade and he's like, "[ __ ] them!"

Well, sometimes people do care about public opinion! But these types of situations where they get like attacked by the media turn them into like a renegade!

[ __ ] him!

Yeah! That's how a lot of people end up renegades!

I just don't think—I—how old is he? 40-something? Professor?

Like that he's going to crawl into the shell over this! I don't think he's going to give a [ __ ]!

Honestly, if he is as nutty as the article made him seem, he won't care!

I don't know! Actually, if he's as nutty as the article made him seem, he's going to like—he's going to freak out!

No! Because she really alluded many times to him being a narcissist! And narcissists love attention!

Like even if it's bad!

Tom Sandoval!

Well, I also think that this article, aside from us, like has not had the intended effect!

Agreed! I think a lot of people are reading right through this and being like, "Okay, yeah, if this were my boyfriend, I wouldn't like this!"

But this is someone's personal business!

No! Also, a lot of people feel like this article was paid for by Big Pharma!

Because Huberman is very much like anti-pharma! You know, bettering yourself through wellness and nature!

And he has a really enormous influence! And he might be hurting Big Pharma!

That's a kind of conspiracy theory I like!

Yeah! It's giving Dope Sick! You know, they're trying to take down Huberman because Huberman's getting people off medication!

Yeah! Claudia, you just cracked the case wide open!

I mean, I didn't! That's what people were saying! They cracked the case!

Yeah! 'Cause you know, he's like, "Go eat a plant instead of taking an Advil!" Things like that!

And if you live well, then you'll find that you don't need as much medication and all those things!

So just glad we got to the bottom of that!

Me too! It's always Big Pharma!

So true! Are you ready for our next story?

I just want to make sure like your camera's recording and stuff! I just get like pit—

You know, so far!

Yeah! Me and Jackie were saying yesterday before the show that we feel like we're due for a tech issue!

If it went off during Huberman

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You're welcome! Our next story is a little movie news. Timothy Chalamet has transformed into Bob Dylan on the set of the new Bob Dylan biopic. I didn't realize he was playing him! I saw this on TikTok or something, but Timothy will star as the folk musician in the upcoming film called "A Complete Unknown." He was photographed Sunday, spotted strolling around New York City's Chelsea neighborhood in another outfit reminiscent of Dylan's wardrobe.

I feel like to be a male actor right now is to lose a role to Timothy Chalamet. Like, is he ever not busy? He's literally the biggest movie star. June Wonka, he's everything—literally the biggest movie star! How does that happen? He's always filming. I don't know, he's so tiny.

Yeah, I feel like it's so emblematic of our generation where what we find to be the most attractive male has changed. Prior to this, we had our Miles Tellers, our Brad Pitts—our big, strong, strapping men. And now, styles have changed; skinny, short, kind of feminine men are the vibe, and that's Timothy Chalamet. He is like his generation's Bond, you know?

Yeah, he is 5'10", so it's not short, but it's short for the beauty standard. I also feel like sometimes men in Hollywood are shorter than you think, like Tom Cruise.

Yes, yes! They're shorter than you think.

What's Kylie's height? Do you think they're still together? She's 5'6"; she's shorter than I thought. Are they still together?

I don't know. I hope so!

I hope so too! They're my favorite couple now. I was just into them, but I'm into whoever Kylie's into, you know?

It's true! When she and Travis were really public and they did that Vogue thing where they sat and answered questions about each other, I was obsessed.

Yeah, she makes me like whoever she likes.

That's true! I think they're still together.

Now, Bob Dylan—this is going to be like one of the most embarrassing things I'm ever going to say.

I'm glad you're saying it because I'm thinking it.

Okay, Bob Dylan isn't black. I think I get Bob Dylan confused with Bob Marley.

Yes, yes! Who the [ __ ] is Bob Dylan?

I don't know! Now I think he's a folk singer. Let me—I'm 90% sure that Bob Dylan is actually Jewish and he's like a very famous, proud Jew whose work we should know. I do know that he sings; he's the one who originally wrote that Adele song "To Make You Feel My Love."

Are you sure about that?

Why would—no! Oh, he wrote—oh wow, okay.

Okay, Claudia, we're really dumb.

"Knockin' on Heaven's Door."

Knock, knock, knockin'! But that, to me, that could have been Bob Marley.

"Like a Rolling Stone."

Not familiar.

"Blowin' in the Wind."

Is that the answer?

My friend is blowin' in the wind.

Yes, the answer is blowin' in the wind.

Um, "Hurricane." Every song is called "Hurricane," by the way.

"Make You Feel My Love," yes or no?

No, I just went to his Spotify. Bob Dylan—why would he have written that song?

I think he wrote it, and it was successful for him, but then Adele covered it, and now everyone thinks it's Adele's song. That happens sometimes.

My gosh, yes! Yeah, no, I'm like smart like that.

Totally! Excuse me, that's not Adele's original.

Oh no, you didn't know that?

No! Oh my God, no! That song always makes me think of that episode of Glee after Finn died. We used to sing in the car, and I used to sing alone.

Oh, so sad!

Yeah, he wrote that song, and Adele covered it and popularized it.

That's like—just knocked me off my feet!

Yeah, okay, so yeah, Bob Dylan—let me see. Bob Dylan, Jew?

Yeah, he is Jewish! It's all coming back to me now. But I definitely confuse him and Bob Marley.

Yeah, me too! 'Cause I thought there would be more backlash over Timothy Chalamet playing Bob Dylan.

Oh yeah, if Bob Dylan is a big Jew.

Yeah, so I feel like actually I need to see this movie given the fact that I know nothing.

Do you think that the actor should have been a Jew?

Timothy Chalamet is Jewish!

He is Jewish! No, I was going to say I thought there would be backlash because I thought Bob Dylan was black. I'm like, "Timothy Chalamet playing this great black artist? Where's the outrage?"

Yeah, no, but I was wrong. I was wrong!

Oh, so it's a good casting?

Yes, actually! I feel like we should see this movie because it sounds like we need to respect Bob Dylan a little bit more for sure.

So we will see the movie?

Yeah, yeah! That's like—I wouldn't know anything about Johnny Cash if I never saw "Walk the Line."

It's so true! A biopic is important.

Really, really! I can't know everything about everyone; I'm sorry!

Okay, so true! What's your favorite movie biopic?

That's a good question 'cause we loved "Walk the Line" growing up.

We did! I need to see a list of biopics.

Yeah, yeah! Like "Elvis," obviously.

That's definitely not my favorite, but it wasn't a great—it was a good movie, but not like an amazing biopic.

What, "Elvis"?

Yeah, I agree 'cause it was like not serious.

No, and like learning someone's start to finish—how their career went is fascinating. I don't like when movies zone in on like two weeks in someone's life.

Oh, totally!

Okay, this list of biopics is like not what I am looking for 'cause they're not all like famous people in that sense.

Yeah, I watched the—like "The Wolf of Wall Street" is technically a biopic.

Like, oh my God! People—I hate when Google doesn't get us!

He doesn't understand the assignment! So annoying!

Biopic movies—oh, "Secretariat." That was a great biopic!

That's not what I'm talking about!

Like "Selena" was a very good biopic.

It was, yeah! And educational, you know?

That getting "One Life"—oh, I mean, you know "Bohemian Rhapsody" and "Elon," but no, I wouldn't—like those were really popular biopics, but in terms of like being really good and deep, they were just like fun.

Yeah, and like beautiful.

Yeah, like really well done. I feel like honestly "Walk the Line," from everything I'm seeing, was really good.

Was really good, yeah!

Okay, they're saying "Amadeus" is also about Mozart, but I heard that wasn't good.

Oh, where did you read that? On your Mozart fanfiction forum?

And like, did you even know there was one?

Oh, it's from 1984, so it's like—you probably would love it! You should watch it!

Maybe I will! Report back! I want a two-page essay on "Amadeus."

Okay, that is funny!

Yeah, like "I, Tonya"—that's not what I'm talking about!

Okay, move on!

I agree! I agree!

It's move on, please! I can't with the research!

Like "Forgetting Sarah Marshall"—the greatest show!

Yeah, done!

Okay, fifth and final story! The Bachelorette has been named, and it is the first Asian leading lady for season 21!

Know that Jen Tran, who was a contestant from Joey's season, which I saw just ended, has been named the leading lady for The Bachelorette season 21.

I like The Bachelor! This season, like, Loki was making waves.

I feel like Loki—it was good!

When I say Loki, I feel like Tom Hiddleston—Loki, that's his character, right?

I think so! That's his—yeah, Loki! That's how I say it!

The Bachelor looks good this season!

Yeah, well, it's over, and I just saw who won, so I saw pictures. But I feel like I wouldn't know if I had a sick day soon. I think I might binge The Bachelor.

Oh, that's like kind of crazy! It's over!

Like, please don't waste your time binging something that you can't recap on the podcast!

Like, oh, that's so true! But unless I did it like tomorrow and I could recap the whole season.

But no, also I can't watch week to week, though! I can't do that for The Bachelor!

No, it's insufferable! Like, I won't go back there! I don't care if it's like keeping up with The Bachelor was some of the worst years of my life!

Like, I will—you cannot make me go back there! I don't care if it's the best [ __ ] on the planet now!

I'm at a place where I'll see like headlines about two people from Bachelor in Paradise. I think they just got engaged, and like I don't know the name, never heard the name before, never saw this person.

Like, I'm so out! Where I feel like for a while it was still like residual people, but now I've cycled through, and these all are new.

But I do think like if you are a Bachelor watcher, like this was a good season!

Yeah, I think so too! 'Cause I saw people talking about it, and I haven't seen people talking about it in probably two, three years.

And also, even that story made headlines where he said that it had Jo Graham, and he was funny and cute, like, and dumb.

Like, I liked it!

Malta had an old-school vibe!

Malta does have an old-school vibe, and I feel that!

Joey, I do!

And so now their next leading lady, I think people are really excited about. She looks fabulous!

I hope that they're having a renaissance over there!

I just think it's funny—The Bachelor, like, it's 2020 whatever, like, is still having their first this, first that.

Like, they are so behind, and they're catching up!

Oh, you know what I was actually thinking about the other day? The way that we got like a quiet on set.

I feel like we need something about like Bachelor Nation at its height.

I think we need like the rise and fall of The Bachelor, including like Mike Fleiss, the Chris Harrison thing.

Like, we need a comp—like, what the [ __ ] happened?

How do you go from being literally like the biggest phenomenon in pop culture, like literally setting the tone, every celebrity watching your show? Millions!

Like, literally even a bad season had like 7 million viewers, and this was post the cable peak!

Like, what the [ __ ]? I need an explanation on what happened in documentary format!

I wonder what it was. A lot of people blame the Chris Harrison drama, but I feel like it was over before that.

Yeah, like when was it over for you?

Claire Crawley!

I think that this is when it was over for me, but I watched Matt James' season.

Was that after?

Yeah, I watched too!

And then who was after Matt James?

I feel like it was Claire after.

No, 'cause Matt was on Claire's season.

Now hold on—who?

Yeah, list of Bachelorettes!

Who? Clayton!

We definitely didn't watch that, but I feel like there was someone before that who came after Matt James.

Who was the girl Bachelorette?

Oh, they had the two!

Okay, Claudia, it was like Michelle Young, Gabby, and—

Oh yeah!

And no, that girl, Claudia, what's her name? The pilot?

No, no, they were after Gabby and Rachel!

No, but for Matt James' season, Claudia, Katie with the dildo!

Yeah, so I think I might have finished Matt James' season and left it at that, and then I didn't watch Katie.

Did you watch Michelle?

No!

So then I stopped! That was the last I watched!

So if I had to blame someone person for me, it would be Katie!

Damn!

That would, to me, be an enticing documentary!

I also feel like there was a lot that went on behind the scenes, and I think a lot of the leads have their NDAs have run out.

And I think a lot of them would—if they're no longer involved in the franchise, I feel like a lot of them had weird things with Mike Fleiss.

Like, I want to hear!

Yes, I agree with you! It's ripe for nefarious behavior!

But I also feel like a lot of the Bachelor people, especially former Bachelor people who don't have NDAs, like they have platforms and they have podcasts.

And if they had a story that they wanted to tell, they're in the business of storytelling, and they would have—perhaps!

Perhaps!

So I don't know how much there is that we don't actually already know.

I feel like we know a lot!

We do! I feel like it is what you think it is, like the show "Unreal."

Exactly! Even when "Unreal" came out, it made The Bachelor look so bad.

The Bachelor was so big it couldn't be taken down!

Like, how do you go from that to being the most relevant?

And it was made by former Bachelor producers, so you knew they were like harping on real experiences!

Yeah, so that was today's Fast Five! It's such a blast!

I love when the stories give!

I just don't think we could call it the Fast Five.

The Fidus?

What does that mean?

Like, stalwart!

I feel like that works!

The Stalwart Five!

Love! Even though that's like not what we—you're trying to say, but that's a good word!

Fidus—very attentive to and concerned about accuracy and detail!

I would say the Fastidious Five!

And then what's stalwart? Loyal, reliable, and hardworking!

That's also good! Also applies!

The Fastidious Stalwart Five!

Thank you guys so much for listening to The Toast Morning Show, where we delve into the past five stories you need to know every Monday through Friday on YouTube.

So if you're watching us on YouTube, please feel free to subscribe, give this video a thumbs up!

We're also available as a podcast, and podcasts can be found on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, iHeartRadio, Castbox—all the places!

Podcast about a beautiful signing and wickedly talented!

We are! I hope you guys have an amazing Tuesday, and we'll see you on—

Yeah, that's right—tomorrow!

Like, we're halfway there tomorrow!

That's exciting!

It is exciting!

And exciting excitement excites me!

And it's lunch! Goodbye! Love you! Bye!

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Diddy, Huberman & Bob Dylan: The Toast, Tuesday, March 26th, 2024

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