Transcription
About six years ago, I went through my entire house, and me alongside my family, decluttered about 80 to 85% of our stuff. There were benefits to that, but I just don't view minimalism the same way that I used to back then. Let's talk about how I've kind of changed my view on minimalism and what's working for me right now in this phase of life with older teenagers, a younger daughter, and just a different work schedule.
I used to have a very very strict decluttering rule. If I could not decide in five seconds what to do with an item, it was an automatic toss. There were a very very few exceptions to this. Overall, it was a 5-second rule. Decide and let the item go. I actually have several regrets of things that I decluttered very quickly, almost impulsively, that I wish I could take back. So, I don't do that anymore. I give myself sometimes days or weeks to decide on things that I'm not sure about.
I used to schedule decluttering sessions. Now, this was back when my whole house felt out of control. There are definitely areas of my house now that feel out of control to me, but my entire house as a general whole doesn't feel so overwhelming. So, I don't schedule decluttering sessions. I just kind of declutter as I go. If I open a drawer and notice it's like getting stuck really really full, even if I don't have time to do a complete project right that second, I might just make sure that I pull 10 pieces of trash out of that drawer. So, I just declutter a little bit more manageably and work it into my daily rhythm.
I used to allow myself only a very specific number of items. You may have this many towels, this many mugs, this many candles, this many pieces of jewelry. And I really limited myself to those numbers. Now I just kind of use the container concept where if it fits in the area, then I can keep it. And I lean a lot more towards that than I do the number just specific counted items. I feel like it's a little bit more breathable. It doesn't make me feel so rigid and stressed like, "Oh no, if [laughter] I have seven towels and I'm supposed to have six, then my clutter is getting out of control. If the towels don't fit in the bin, then I need to declutter towels." And I just let that kind of visually be my cue, whereas before I would just say this many numbers. That was way too highrung for me and really stressful.
To be honest, I used to declutter pretty much anything my kids weren't currently wearing, playing with, using, and I, this is where a lot of my decluttering regret has come from, is kids stuff. I regret getting rid of some of their books and toys, even some of their clothes from when they were little. And I realize now it didn't seem so sentimental at the time when they were still tiny. But looking back, I'm like, "Oh my gosh, those were keepsakes. I wish I had now just as a sentimental item." And I decluttered almost all of it. And I feel very sad about that. So I definitely even as my kids are growing, I hang on to a little bit more. I hang on to more art projects. I hang on to more books, clothes, even toys that I never would have dreamed of hanging on to before.
Okay, I used to make sure that I kept pretty much everything out of sight unless it was like meant to be there. Let me show you what I mean. So, I have this little It is a clutter catcher this area. It's just a corner next to the fridge. The fruit bowls there. People, including myself, love to just set random stuff there. It's also where the junk drawer is. So, it kind of like makes sense, I guess, that it's just like the junk area. Never in a million years would I think that I would set up this little station for us where there are books, my scripture study material, my Bible. I keep all of this right here out in the open. It It's just functional. I like want to make sure that I have it accessible, that I see it, and remember to use these books. Uh, oh, I have some records out here just because I love playing these records in the kitchen when I'm cleaning up or doing dishes. And so, again, this is very lived in, not so rigid before where I thought it I can't see it. If it's not meant to be there, if it seems cluttery, then it can't it can't live there.
Same with the fridge. I used to make sure there weren't even magnets allowed on the refrigerator several years ago. I am so loosey goosey with that now. If the kids do a cute art project, I put it up there and it will stay up there for weeks. I have their little school photos up that I just love to look at all the time. It doesn't bother me the way that I used to. I used to make sure everything was like white, white dishes, white everything. And now I have broken a few ramicins and I replace them with something just totally adorable. Like I don't even worry that these won't go with every holiday. They won't go with every season or table setting. I'm just like, they're adorable. So, I'm way less strict and rigid on how streamlined everything has to be. I'm allowing the stuff in my house to have a lot more personality, and I'm having so much fun with that.
Oh, I used to buy a lot more consumables for holidays and birthdays for my kids. Now, I buy them stuff that they can keep forever. I don't really worry it has to be a coloring book, chalk, crayons. Granted, they're older, so they're asking for way different stuff, but I used to just be obsessed with getting consumables. And now, if there's something that they really want, I just if it's reasonable, then I will let them get it. And I don't worry about whether or not it can be tossed or recycled after they're done with it.
Oh, I used to really focus on a limited library in my home. I didn't want there to be too many books. This is where the container concept can really come in handy. I suppose if it fits on the shelf, then you get to keep it. But I used to really dwindle down my library and there would be empty spaces on the bookshelves. Now I let them fill up. We love having a more robust library. I have all kinds of curriculum. I used to be a public school teacher. I've homeschooled recently. And so I just allow myself to have all these beautiful literature, books, curriculums that I wouldn't have allowed myself to have before. Let me give you a really realistic picture here. My kids don't just go down and sit for hours in front of a bookcase with a little cup of tea and like make all my dreams come true. It's totally fine. I love having the resource. We read a lot during the summer. So, even though they're not what I would consider avid readers, I love having the resources available for them, especially when it's like off times with the school schedule, I really do pull these books out and encourage them and even pay them to read the books. Let me know in the comments if you think that is crazy. I think it's controversial to pay your kids to read. Uh, let me know what you think in the comments.
I used to focus so much on experiences over physical items. And though I still love this concept and I would much rather create like a solid memory doing an outing, something unusual, a pottery class, who knows what it could be, a hike, something free. I used to focus a lot more than on that than things that I could like physically get to create a memory. Here's what I realized though. You can make ordinary moments very special by buying something that you normally wouldn't. For example, my daughter and I love to cook in the kitchen. My boys loved this too when they were little, but I got my daughter, she outgrew her little baker's hat, so I purchased another one. I thought this enhances the experience. This item enhances the experience. So, I don't have to go out and create like some new routine, some new memory. Baking's already part of our current routine, but let me add something to make it special and more memorable.