Transcription
I don't believe in marriage counseling or relationship counseling. And this is someone who has done both, right? When my marriage was on the outs, my ex-husband demanded we go to counseling. When my relationship was on the outs, we did counseling, right?
Why I don't agree with it and I don't think it really works is because counseling is to bring two people together for them to discuss problems they're having and the remedies for their problems, right? What people need is individual therapy and to deal with the issues they are having because the issues they're having in relationships, the other person is only bringing those personal issues out. So no matter what relationship the person is in, they're going to display those same issues they have internally with anybody they're with.
Relationships are to teach us about ourselves. That's why you shouldn't really regret relationships because it always shows you a side of yourself that you don't see. Your partner is your mirror. Whether it be a marriage, relationship, situationship, whatever it is, an affair, they're all mirrors. So if you are not dealing with your issues, you're not really going to face the problem in totality because the problem is really you, right? You are the reason why things are happening, right?
And so I entertain the the the counseling with my ex-husband and I entertain the counseling with my ex-boyfriend, but I had already made up my mind because the thing is once you see things, you can't unsee it, right? Once you learn things, you can't unlearn it. Once the door is open, it's always going to remain ajar, right? This is why women will never really get over their man cheating on them because it stains our brains, right?
There are things that this is why people have to be mindful and proactive in life. You don't ever get comfortable with anybody. Don't get comfortable with no man. Don't get comfortable with no woman. Always be on your P's and Q's. Because at least by doing that, you know, you gave your best. You put your best foot forward. And if things don't work out, it did not work out because you didn't try your best, right?
People tend to get comfortable in relationships and they start showing certain sides of them that people don't like. And you can't unsee certain things. And counseling is not going to fix that, right? Because what people really need to do is deal with their demons. The other person is just showing them their demons and the demons are fighting each other, right? The other person's demons and your demons.
And knowing how limited most humans are, there will be people who say, "Well, she don't believe in counseling because it didn't work for her. It didn't work in a relationship." Right? That's not why I don't believe in counseling. I don't believe in counseling because counseling, just like relationship content and dating advice, it doesn't work because it's teaching you how to be for someone else, right?
When you deal with yourself, your shadows, your traumas, and all these things, you can go into a partnership with someone and it'll be easier to see certain things in the person in yourself, right? People run to counseling often times for the person to tell the other person that they're wrong and they should do things that their partner wants them to do. It's really just a game that people play with each other. It's not really to heal themselves. It's to make the relationship better. But the relationship cannot be better unless the people are better, right?
So I believe that people should work on themselves as they're in relationships. But people don't want to do that. People get in relationships for many reasons to escape the relationship that they're in, right? They this is how people end up with extramarital affairs or they end up in situationships and the person, you know, they're comfortable with the person or they're in a, you know, for whatever reason they're not really dealing with why they are the way that they are and why this person is bringing certain things out of them.
So you will hear women say, "Well, he's a different man with me than he was with her." Yeah, because you're showing different sides of him that he's never seen with her. It doesn't make you better because he may not have seen shadows that he doesn't want to see with her. He may not see them with you. That doesn't make the relationship better, right? People are not really dealing with themselves. They're escaping themselves through people. That's why their relationships don't work.
So I say often to women, which makes women, you know, a little uneasy because most women want to be in relationships with men. Most of you want husbands. Most of you want that fairy tale. No matter how much you lie about it and you're strong, independent, most of you are liars. You want to be with men in that way. But the fact is, you will not be able to self-actualize and be with men. You are going to have to take something from yourself to give it to men. It's never going to work for you.
This is an uncomfortable truth for women. And then women will be in my comments lying, saying, you know, I tell the truth that men are not going to allow women to truly be themselves in an ascended way. See, men like women when they're themselves, when they're like dumb and naive. Men love dumb women. Or they may like smart women, but the smart woman has to be limited. She can't really. If you really want to know how a man feels about an ascended woman who sees life for what it is, show them my content and ask them how they feel about it. And not just the content about women. Show them the content about men, the things that I say. I'm very triggering. Very triggering. Not just to women, to men, too. And it be strong, self-assured. I'm very triggering. Men don't want to deal with that on an everyday basis. They like the idea of me because I give men things to think about. Men respect competence, but they want to lay with incompetence.
Just like women don't want to see themselves, men are the same way. Just like women like content where I'm talking about men, men like content where I'm talking about women. Men are exactly the same as they complain about women being. They are the same thing. But being with a man is not going to work to be someone a woman that's self-actualized. It's too much. It's too much pressure for a man. Men go in the world and deal with a lot just from being a man and pursuing his purpose and, you know, establishing dominance over other men and, you know, creating a lane for himself. It's not easy for men.
Now, I don't know what it's like to be a man, but I can recognize what happens amongst men when it comes to power and hierarchy and these things, right? Men don't want to deal with that at home. And so even somebody like me, I'm very opinionated. I'm very intelligent and I'm very outspoken. But in order for me to deal with a man, I have to tone that down a little bit. I can't fully be myself just like men cannot fully be themselves with women.
So when women think that their husbands are their best friends, they just allow you to believe that. Men are never going to be 100% men around us. They can't. We will be repulsed by them. So no matter how much you think you're one of the boys and you may be in a group chat, they have a group chat that you're not in. Your man may tell you certain things, but there are things that men will never share with women, right? It's just we're not equal and we serve a purpose in each other's lives that there should be the lines are blurred. And this is where the hurt comes in because we have expectations for each other that we're not supposed to fulfill, right?
To be a self-actualized woman is to be by herself. To be a self-actualized man is to be with a woman. To be a powerful man is totally different from being a powerful woman. It's easier for a man to be in power than a woman to be in power. She's going up against way more. Not to reduce or minimize what men go through to assert power in this world. I'm not saying that it's easy. I'm saying that for women to do it, we face more obstacles because it's not expected of us. And we go against men who are the power structure, right? It's different from men going against men, right?
So, there's a lot at play that women who want to be self-actualized, it just doesn't work well with being in a relationship with a man. Now, I'm not saying you can't have companionship or you can't, you have to write men off or you have to become a misandrist. I'm not saying any of these things. I'm saying it's not going to be possible for you to be 100% actualized and be with a man. So in order to be with a man and be mastered, self-actualized, ascended, it has to be very surface level.
See, I can't really talk about all of the things about men with men. I can talk about women to men, but I can't really talk about men to men. And even with women is limited because it really depends on the kind of man I'm talking to. If I'm talking to a man who believes it's their duty to, you know, write all the wrongs of men and give women a chance, they're going to listen to me from ears of like pity for women. They're not going to really respect what I'm saying. Men want to be your saviors. They don't want you to save yourselves.
And so somebody like me who's very aware of things and I can see men and I can see women, I become less of a project and more of competition. So in order for me to be on the ship of relations with men with a man, I have to reduce myself. I'm not going to be dumb and I can't play dumb because men know I'm intelligent. But there are things that I got to overlook or I just don't speak about. Like I'll have conversations and I'll peep certain things and then I won't ever talk about it again because I know that certain men are just not ready for certain things, right?
Right now I can talk to a man that I have no dealings with and they will hear me out and be like, "Oh, yeah, yeah." But they don't have to deal with me. A man that I'm dealing with and sleeping with is a totally different thing because there's still hierarchy there. There's still a power structure and there's still male ego that's never going anywhere. And I believe the more powerful a man gets, the bigger his ego gets, which it should go smaller, but it doesn't.
So I posted a couple videos on my Facebook where I was from a TikTok live where a woman was, you know, she posts questions about biology and the sperm and egg and what role the sperm plays and what role the egg plays and the things that men were saying is like mind-blowing and how much they really don't understand biology or they don't want to believe the role women play. Like it's like men just believe we're incubators and they just come plant their seed and we just grow it. It's just a crazy mindset that a lot of men have.
And it may not only be in biology. It's just other things like men believe they can teach women how to be women. Even though they don't know what it's like to be a woman. They don't have any experience in being a woman. But they believe because they [ __ ] women or they understand why women do the things that they do or they understand our behaviors that they think they can tell us how to be women. The only thing a man could tell you about womanhood is what they want in a woman and what they think women should be.
Just like women cannot tell men how to be men. They'll respect that. I don't believe women can raise boys into men because we don't understand what it's like to be a man. We don't understand what's necessary for a man to survive in the world that the way they have to survive is too harsh for us. We're not women cannot prepare boys to be men. They have to go with their fathers or other men. Men will respect that, but men will actually believe my father taught me how to be a woman.
So, there's a lot of little subconscious beliefs that men have that are too deeply ingrained for them to actually be in a marriage with a woman who's self-actualized. Because when you start to see things, you say things, and you do things, and the male ego, it just doesn't work. So, men and women are not equal. We're never going to be equal. We're not created to be equal. We're created to complement each other. But because we're never going to be equal, men are never going to view you as their equal.
In order for a man to be in a harmonious relationship with a self-actualized, ascended, self-mastered woman, he has to view her as an equal. Men are never going to view you as an equal just by how things are set up. We don't suffer the same consequences as men. Women can be disrespectful and won't lose their lives. Men are disrespectful. Men will lose their lives. Men are held to a higher standard than women are. Women can be complete losers and men will still find a way to make them useful. That will happen for men, too. But men are looked down upon for that. Women are not.
Women can be dumb and useless and just complete morons. And a man will just say, "She's a woman, so we're allowed to do that." Men are not allowed, even though it happens, we're not looked at at the same as a man who is in her predicament, right? And so men will always view us as something they have to take care of, something they have to cover or own or sleep with or be with, right?
Men don't approach you to be with you. Men approach you because they're sexually attracted to you. Men don't approach women they're not attracted to. They don't approach women they don't want to [ __ ]. So every woman a man approaches, they want to sleep with them or they want to be with them in some way. No man has ever approached me and didn't want to sleep with me, right? Things grow into a relationship. Men end up in relationships with us. They don't they don't come to us for that. They decide later if we're their wife or the side chick or the mistress or whatever it is, right? That comes later.
Men cannot view that as equal, right? We talked about the Madonna [ __ ] complex before. Well, I spoke about it, not we. Um, um, they cannot it can't you can't exist in both. When men start to when men start to view you as more than the [ __ ] he can't he can't treat you the same. This is why men liked me better when I was on Instagram just posting thirst traps or I just had my fashion line because I didn't speak my mind. I always had this mind but I didn't speak it. They liked me better then. Now it's too much to deal with. I'm still nice to look at and they may want to [ __ ] me because men still just want to.
When women start implementing the things I teach, they're going to recognize that men are not going to pursue them as they did. Men are going to fall back more. It's not going to be the same dynamic. And this is why women eventually give up because you don't have the same interactions with men. And it's because men are not viewing you as a sexual object anymore. Now that's not true. They are viewing you as a sexual object, but it's more of a state. Now you become humanized. You're a human now with thoughts, feelings, and emotions. Men don't want that stuff. They especially don't want it from women that they're not really in a relationship with, right?
So for me, I have to keep things really surface level. I'm not married, right? I'm not building my life with a man. So, a man really doesn't want the real depth. I can go there. They can tip their toe in the water, but it can't get too much because then it starts becoming too much and then I start losing they start losing the fantasy of me. Like, this is why they don't like for women to talk because they lose that. They like dumb airhead women. Or again, if she could be a little smart, but just don't be too smart. All right? Right.
So, it's a lot going on there with the male ego and, you know, things that have to be worked on. Is it completely impossible? I believe it is, right? Um, but, you know, people will want to go to counseling to remedy that when it's really not the counseling that's going to remedy that. It's men working on themselves to view women differently than they've been viewing women. But then that takes the fun away from dealing with women and having them around and making them smile and all these things.
Many of you really think men view you as equal or you're their besties, and especially if you're attractive. I mean, we're talking about men. We're talking about human nature. We're talking about animalistic nature and sexuality and all these things. Nobody's really touching on that. People are just getting together and then hoping [ __ ] works out and then they go to counseling and, you know, they break up and they find somebody else but they've never really dealt with the problem, right? The mirror is too clean over here, right?
And so any interactions with men, even solid ones, solid ones, it would have to be very surface level. I can't go too deep because they start to feel challenged, right? Men don't want to be challenged by a man.