Schlatt's Candy Tier List

Today's the day I'm going to rank every single candy known to man. And make no mistake, this will upset you.

One second. Inside this box is every candy I know of. And I know a lot of them because I'm fat. So, we got the tier list here. I'm going to go through and rank them from S to F. S being the best and F being the worst. We're going to piss some people off in the process. So, let's get started.

All right. Snickers. Snickers is as basic as it gets. It's like the industry plant of the candy world. Like, you ever met someone who really liked Snickers? Well, it's a perfect like middle of the road candy, and I think it's a good place to start. I'm going to put Snickers at a decent C.

Milky Way's up next. Snickers has a bunch of like lame cousins that come around every holiday. They won't stop talking about Fortnite or some [ __ ] It's basically Milky Way. This is just Snickers without peanuts. And I got to come clean. I love nuts. I care about the mouth feel of a candy. And nuts just feel so good in my mouth. So, I'm giving Milky Way a D. It's worse.

All right. Three Musketeers is up next. And this is the even lamer cousin. It's Milky Way without the caramel, which means it's just nougat. Just nougat is crazy, bro. It's terrible. It's not worth eating. I'm giving Three Musketeers an E. Nougat. Oh, nougat is crazy.

Baby Ruth is up next. And Baby Ruth is like Snickers if it sucked. And it looks like a lump of [ __ ] It's got the same ingredients as a Snickers does. It's just done so in a way where the ratio is entirely off and it feels strange to eat. Kind of makes you appreciate Snickers more. Maybe Ruth gets an E from me. Not liking it.

All right, 100 Grand is up next. And the only thing interesting about this candy is the name. Unfortunately, 10 of these things in a bag is as close as my generation will ever get to wealth. It kind of sucks, too. I'm giving it an E. Look, I'm sorry. I'm not trying to be negative so early.

Let's do something good. Okay, here we go. Heath, baby. So, I actually never had a Heath bar until it came time to make this video. It just felt like an old man candy, you know, like [ __ ] Heath. What do you mean Heath? But I'm not going to lie. It's pretty good. It's got the same kind of consistency and mouth feel as Butterfinger despite it being not the same candy bar at all. And that gets you points in my book. I'm giving Heath the B. This is the best one so far.

Okay. All right. All right. We got Butterfinger up next. The rankings are about to change. There's going to be a trend in this video that you're going to begin to notice, and it's that I love peanut butter candy, and Butterfinger just does it right. M. Oh my god. You got the perfect flavor, the perfect consistency. Honestly, it's hard to do better than this. I'm giving Butterfinger an S, baby. Holy [ __ ] it's good.

That one shouldn't be too controversial, but uh this next one will be because up next, we got Hershey's. And Hershey's. Hold on, boys. Before we keep going, please allow me to fulfill a contractual obligation. Today's video is sponsored by Display Baby. Are you tired of being a boring, dumb person with nothing on your walls? You wish you could find a way to show off your unique interests and personality without breaking the budget? Well, lucky for you, Display Plate is here to save the day. With over 2 million designs available on the site across a huge variety of official brands and franchises like Marvel, Star Wars, and The Witcher, you're sure to find the perfect metal poster for your taste. Just look how cool they are. They're super durable. They're made of metal, and they just look amazing. Especially in the new texture designs that I got. And look how easy they are to put up. All you do is wipe down the surface, stick the protective leaf down, slap some magnets on it, and pop the thing onto the wall. The whole process took me under a minute. And my lanyad won't get upset at me either, cuz there's no damage to the wall. When you're done, you just take it off. And look how easy it is to swap them out, too. I don't know why they sent this to me. I didn't ask for this, boys. Right now, Displate is celebrating their 12th birthday, which means you'll get a little birthday surprise with each order, including a sticker pack and a gift card. And on top of that, you can click the link in the description or use my code J Schlatt to get the biggest discount this year, even on the 3D texture designs. Happy birthday to Display Plate. Thanks again for sponsoring today's video. And now back into it.

Up next, we got Hershey's. And Hershey's, it's good. It's good. In fact, it's I think it's the best chocolate bar. I do. And before every British person who's ever existed comes to the comment section and writes like, "Oh, Royal Ribers feared on why and dairy milk is the best [ __ ] chocolate bar." Shut up. Sorry I'm not ranking your favorite European chocolate bar. I'm talking about the ones we get here and we don't get your [ __ ] And look, here's how I feel about Hershey's, right? Much like a chicken McNugget. If you don't grow up eating Hershey's, you're not going to like it. But I grew up eating Hershey's, so I love it. That's why I'm giving Hershey's a B.

All righty. Toblerone's up next. Strangely, Toblone is like the only vaguely European candy that's broken into the American market. I like the form factor. The form factor is fun. You get these little chocolate mountains. And make no mistake, the chocolate is better than Hershey's, but that nougat really [ __ ] it up. It ruins the mouth feel of this chocolate. Takes it from an A down to like a D for me. I really wish I could like it, but I I can't.

All right, here we go. This is the one [ __ ] thing I I had to like search far and wide for the [ __ ] dairy milk. You people would not have shut up if I didn't talk about this goddamn chocolate bar. British people hype this [ __ ] up big time. Oh well, all chocolate's just come down to London and get yourself stabbed to part and parcel. We're living in a city. It's okay. It's almost like too creamy. You lose a little bit of the complexity that makes a good chocolate good when you go too far in the cream direction. I don't know. I feel like this is like a very low IQ chocolate. Sorry. I'm giving it a C. It's okay, but it's not great.

What the [ __ ] is this? Tony's Chocolate Only. Tony's Chocolate Only. I don't know how this got in the bag. I don't know what this is. Uh, crazy about chocolate. Serious about people. Slave free. British people still making chocolate the oldfashioned way. Um, I'm going to give this a Whoa. We've got a very interesting bar design from Tony. I kind of like it. And I like it better than the Cadbury. I really do. Don't get me wrong, I love cream in my mouth, but but this one is just richer. It's got more of a intelligent flavor. I like it. Also, you got to give him a B for not using slaves, which I thought we were we were done with. I'm giving I'm giving Tony's a B.

Oh, Lord. Oh, brother. It is at this point of the video that I will destroy my chances of ever being put in a swelteringly hot cube and having my name mispronounced in front of 300 million people ever again. We also lost JL is not better than Hershey's and it's kind of not even close. The chocolate simply does not taste as good and it's got this weird mouth feel that I strongly strongly dislike. Sorry Jim, if you send me $10 million I'll cut this part right out of the video for you. But for now, your candy's getting a D.

Mastables also tried copying like other better tasting candies homework too. Uh so let's run through them all right now. Let's talk about Nestle Crunch. If you want some texture in a chocolate bar, Nestle Crunch is your one-stop shop. The chocolate's really good and the crisp rice just adds that pop. The whole thing just works and I really, really like it. Nestle Crunch is an A tier chocolate bar. One of the best, honestly.

And then we got Feastables Milk Crunch. Now I'm just going to say it. This is a dollar store version of Nestle Crunch. Do you see what they're going up against here? Like Like is this is this some kind of sick [ __ ] joke, Mr. Beast? There's like a a a fifth of the crunch that a Nestle Crunch has. It does Nestle Crunch a disservice by including the two in the same sentence. It's not even [ __ ] close. That's why I'm giving it a C.

All right, here we go. Hershey's Cookies and Cream. I don't think I know a single person in my life who doesn't love this candy bar. There's nothing wrong with it. Everything from the chocolate to the cookies to the the the cream just spot on. Oh my god. So good. Hershey's cookies and cream getting an A right up there with Nestle Crunch, baby.

All right, he got the Mr. Beast version. Yay. Again, it's the same situation here. The flavors are just not as good. And this one has like a a noticeably bad mouth feel. It's so waxy. That is to say, I'm going to give this one a C. It's a good flavor combination. They just don't do it as good as the people are trying to copy.

Okay, Reese's Peanut Butter Cups. And no, it is not Reese's. Okay, if you say it like that, I pray every night for you to burn in hell. A Reese's Peanut Butter Cup is quite possibly the best candy ever made. Peanut butter and chocolate is such like a easy home run, but something about the ratio and the mouth feel and the experience of eating a Reese's Cup just feels right. I got like a hundred candies to eat today. I'm eating the whole [ __ ] cup, [ __ ] A Reese's cups easy ass. That's good.

Makes you wonder why does Feastables even try with this [ __ ] It's basically a Reese's in candy bar form. And once again, no [ __ ] shot. The ratios are off. It feels bad in the mouth. Like, how is that a a recurring theme here that the chocolate bar doesn't feel good to eat? A C is the lowest I could ever give this combination of flavors, but that's what this one gets. I'm giving it a C. It's not great, but it's not all fuckups for Fastables because they got this peanut butter crunch. This one is basically a combination of their peanut butter bars and their crunch bars, which both of them are okay on their own, but together I think it's finally found its footing. In my opinion, this is the best Feastables offering. I'm going to give this one a B. Look, Feastable's problem is that they're making knockoff versions of the best candies out there, and they just don't stack up. If Jimmy was smart, he'd go looking down my list a little bit. Maybe make a little ripoff of a hundred grand. then you'd have a chance of making it better. You know what I'm saying?

On that note, let's talk about some fruity candies. Skittles, baby. I sound excited. Uh, I'm not because Skittles are what M&M's would be if they tasted bad. Let's just say I don't like them and I don't like you. I'm putting Skittles at a date.

All righty, we got Airheads up next. Airheads always scared me growing up because I thought that if I ate one, I'd turn into the [ __ ] balloon thing. Those commercials scared the [ __ ] out of me. Luckily, that doesn't actually happen when you eat them. And in fact, they taste generally okay. I think they got better flavors and a noticeably better texture than Laffy Taffy. So, I'm giving Airheads a C.

And Laffy Taffy, I'm giving it a D. It's too hard. It's kind of [ __ ] up looking. You know, the texture doesn't get any better as you chew it like an Airhead. All in all, I just think it's kind of worse. So, I'm giving it a D. Laffy Taffy is made by Wonka.

And speaking of Wonka, do they make a good candy? We got nerds here. I'm not going to lie. This is objectively the worst form factor for candy ever. Oh, I don't care how good they taste. They get [ __ ] everywhere and they and I I hate them. You will never see me, a grown ass man, eating [ __ ] nerds. Okay, I'm giving this a D. I'm giving them an E. Terrible. I feel like I'm going to choke and die on them. Oh god, just had a brush with death right there. He actually almost started choking on them. I want to see my grandma again. So zone. Jesus.

It's another Wonka one. Pixie Sticks. Grow the [ __ ] up. Jesus Christ. This is the first F of the day. Uninspired. I hate Pixie Sticks.

Doesn't get much better with Fun Dip either. Are you still eating this? Like, come on. Grow the [ __ ] up. I'll give it this though. Fun Dip's a weird one for me because it's not just sugar. Like, yeah, there's a bag of sugar on on one side, but on the other side, you got the liquor stick. Like, the liquor stick is like a perfectly decent chalky candy. Anytime I've had Fun Dip in the past decade of my life, I've only eaten the [ __ ] stick. I suck on it. I lick on it. What can I say? I love it, but it's a waste to include it in a bag of sugar. Like, come on, guys. That's why I can't give Fun Dip anything more than a D.

Speaking of chalky candy, Smarties. Smarties suck. Sorry, they're not good. Smarties. E.

On that note, we got Sweet Tarts. Sweet Tarts suck, too. I know there's a dialogue going on about which one's better, which one's the best chalky candy. They all suck. Get a [ __ ] fun dip if you want a good chalky candy. You want to get into a debate about sweet tarts versus Smarties? Reddit's that way, buddy.

Now, look, despite what you might think from the past couple minutes, you know, I don't actually think that all non- chocolatey candy sucks. I actually like a couple. You just might not agree with me. Ah, come on. I love Twizzlers. Oh, yeah. Look, I like licorice in general, and there's licorice way better than Twizzlers out there, but none are relevant enough to be in this video. And there's not many people in my life that actually like Twizzos either. So, I got to give them a couple pity points. Twizzles aren't bad. I'm going to give them a B. Holy [ __ ] I'm putting Twizzos a B. I want to get some terrible comments for that.

All right, but here we go. Here we go. Sour Patch Kids. Hold hold it. Hold the hate cuz I like these two. This is how you [ __ ] do it, boys. Sour Patch Kids are [ __ ] great. And they got one of the truest catchphrases ever. Sour sweet gone. It's a [ __ ] genius. I love the texture switch up. I love the flavors. Sour Patch Kids. Easy A. Only reason I'm not giving them an S is cuz it's one I like more.

Boom. Swedish fish. Swedish fish are the perfect non- chocolatey candy. I don't know what they're putting in these things in the fish in Sweden. It might be crack because oh my god, these are [ __ ] delicious. And we put some tariffs on these, you know? Let's move some of that manufacturing to the US. I got to give Swedish fish an ass, man. They are so goddamn good.

Before we go any further, I need to make a a very serious statement. Okay. Sometimes I rank things a little higher, a little lower than they should be just to cause a little bit of commotion. You know, get you guys typing in the comments. The engagement raises on the video. The video gets more views. That's the nature of the business. But this one, I'm going to be completely completely honest. [ __ ] me. I love candy [Music] corn. Oh, is this what coming out of the closet feels like? I don't know. I'm too scared to do it myself. Oh, panty corn [ __ ] rock, dude. They are so good. And the seasonality is what really does it for me, right? These things only come around once a year. They're around all the time. I wouldn't care as much, right? But the spooky season is made whole by these carrot looking [ __ ] I love the taste. I'm strangely fond of the waxiness. And I can't help but buying them every year and put them into a nice little bowl. Candy corns. I'm giving an A.

But it gets better. Also in the bowl are these [ __ ] things. The pumpkins. You got to have the pumpkins in the bowl, too. Mellow Cream Pumpkins is the name. I never knew what they were called, but that's that's apparently it. Mellow Cream Pumpkins. Oh, these things were always just like the pumpkins you'd be lucky to find in a bowl of candy corn. They're bigger. They're creamier. They're just a cherry on top of the perfect Halloween snack. I'm giving them an ass, baby. Ass. [ __ ] you.

Oh [ __ ] peeps. This is like on the complete flip side of seasonal candies. I think I'd rather kill myself than eat a peep. In fact, since they're Easter candy, I think I'd rather be crucified than eat a peep. Just like you, you know, like Jesus. They're terrible marshmallows. They got a terrible sugar coating. And the [ __ ] That's [ __ ] up. You're going to eat a baby chick? That's [ __ ] You're a sick [ __ ] if you like these things. I'm giving Peeps an F. [ __ ] you.

Now look, there's so many seasonal candies, we'd be here all [ __ ] day. So, those are the only three I'm going to cover. That being said, it's time to get back to business. Can't believe it's taken us this long. But M&M's M&M's are like the quintessential candy. They're initially advertised as a candy that doesn't melt in your hand. But let's be honest, that's [ __ ] On their own, they're good, but there are so many amazing different varieties of these things. I'm going to give base M&M's a C. Let's see where we go from there.

Yes, sir. Let's talk about M&M minis. M&M minis are undisputably the best form factor of M&M's. The tube is so much more convenient than the bag or the boxes ever will be. It's more fun and the smaller size of these things I think gives the perfect ratio of shell to inner chocolate. They just taste better than the original to me. So, I'm giving the minis a B.

All right. Peanut M&M's. The classic. I'm going to say it. This is the best application of a full peanut into a candy. It works so perfectly here. Way better than it does in a Snickers or, god forbid, a payday. Peanut M&M's. I'm giving a strong A.

That being said, there's other ways to get that peanut flavor in a little bite-sized treat. That's where Reese's Pieces come in. Reese's Pieces. Pieces. Pieces. It's a different peanut experience than the peanut M&M's, but I think it's just as good. They're much smoother. They're much more peanut buttery rather than peanut, but I'm kind of biased for that. Anyways, I'm giving Reese's Pieces an A as well. By far my favorite ice cream topping, by the way.

Then we get this M&M almond. What the [ __ ] is this? This doesn't need to exist, right? Why are we making almond M&M's? Really? Really? Let's ask ourselves this for a second. Is it to make people with peanut allergies feel better? I don't think we should be doing that. You know, this is a terrible nut. It doesn't even come close to the peanut M&M's. So, we're just giving them a shitty knockoff anyways. And unrelated, I don't think we should be giving them anything nice. People with peanut allergies, I say let them die. I'm an M&M's. F.

We're going to keep going. Let's talk about some other bite-sized candy in the section I like to call poppers. Raisinets. Come on, bro. I'm not even opening [Laughter] this.

Snow caps. So, look. I've only had these on ice cream before. I didn't even know they sold them like this. Look, anyone who's eating semieet chocolate nonparels, I don't know how the [ __ ] you even say that. Anyone who's eating these is [ __ ] insane. This belongs on ice cream and ice cream only. F.

All right, we got Whoppers. My mom likes Whoppers. I don't know why. I don't even know why I told you that. It does not matter at all for you to know that. Um, I also don't know how you can make a candy like this not taste good, but they did it. I usually like balls in my mouth, but with this one, I just I just can't do it. Terrible popper. Whoppers? I'm giving them an E.

Oh. Oh, hold on. I'm getting a phone call. Hello. Really? Okay, thank you. I'm being told that uh poppers means something entirely different than than what I thought it did. Um I am uh appalled and quite frankly disgusted.

Milk duds up next. Milk duds are fun to eat until they're not. They taste good, but 30 seconds in, you start asking yourself, "Why the [ __ ] did I do that?" Any good score I could give milk duds is immediately outweighed by how frustrating of an experience it is to fully swallow one. Milk duds I'm giving an E as well.

Up next we got dots. Dots suck. Dots are like if milk duds tasted bad, too. They're just as chew. It's like what the [ __ ] Who the dots? Really? You you you're eating dots as a 25-year-old man? No, we don't we don't we don't eat dots anymore. I'm giving Dots an F. Come on, guys. Let's get real. Let's get with the program, please.

Oh, Jesus Christ. Mike and Ike. What was the boardroom that approved a pillshaped candy named Mike and Ike? What are we talking like? Dwight Eisenhower. That Ike. Who the [ __ ] are Mike and Ike? And why should I care? We smoking crack. That They're terrible. You suck. I'm not even going to eat them. Mike and Ike. F.

Good. And plenty. What the [ __ ] I actually feel disgusted when I even think about the concept of a good and plenty. Like, are these like the little doggy treats that you put pills in and like trick the dog into thinking it's about to eat something good? I've never eaten one and I never will. Good and plenty is [ __ ] [ __ ] dude. This is an F. There's so many Fs. It's crazy.

Next up, hot tamales. Guys, guys, can we stop making pillshaped candy? Whose idea was it? Spicy candy is [ __ ] to begin with, but I just just a just a fundamental disagreement with the form factor of these [ __ ] things. They're terrible. Nobody wants to eat this. This is another F. Give me something good, please.

Okay, here we go. Thank you. Pretzel M&M's. I was getting worried there for a second. Look, normally I'd tell you if you had an already crunchy exterior, you'd want something soft in the middle, right? Something creamy, something soft, you know, chewy. But pretzel M&M's spit in the face of that. Oh, double the crunch. Hard shell outside, hard shell inside. The contrast here is the sweet outside and the salty pretzel. Come on. Who doesn't love a good salty treat in their mouth? Pretzel M&M's. I'm giving an A. Yummy, yummy in my tummy.

Next up, I ate the whole bag. This is the best popper that's ever been made. M&M's crispy. You give me a bag of these things, I will be popping them all day. This is without a doubt the best M&M ever made and potentially the best candy ever made. And I say that with complete confidence. I don't even know if they sell these in the US. Like I I had to import these from Germany. There's like Nazi [ __ ] on the bag. But oh my god, they are [ __ ] delicious. Crispy. M&M's, baby. S all all day.

And I said they're the best M&M's ever made, but they're followed closely by these peanut butter M&M's. Like I said, I love a good contrast. And the hard shell of the peanut butter M&M's with the creamy peanut butter just does it for me more than the regular peanut M&M's do. So, I got to put peanut butter M&M's. NS. Seriously, if you haven't tried either of those two, you got to get out there and try them.

Okay, Mr. Good Bars up next. So, a Mr. good bar is a Hershey's chocolate bar with peanut in it. There are so many ways to get this combination of peanut and chocolate, and this is the worst one by far. The texture is just not there. Hershey's chocolate is not not meant for this kind of stuff. It's not terrible, but it's not good. I'm giving this a D.

Payday. I would rather watch the towers fall again than eat a payday bar. This thing is absolutely heinous. It's entirely peanuts held together with like a caramel glue. Oh my god. It It tastes like It It's like a military ration. Like this is some [ __ ] you eat in a in a [ __ ] trench because you need the calories and your foot is rotting because it's there's water in your boot and you have trench foot, but you need calories to stay alive. So you got to eat the Payday bar. [ __ ] you. Got to eat the Payday bar. It's [ __ ] terrible. It's terrible. I don't want to. I I never want to see a painted bar again in my life. Oh, [ __ ] F. Terrible. Terrible. Disgusting creation. Truly one of the greatest horrors mankind has ever devised. Worse than the [ __ ] mustard gas those dudes would have to deal [Music] with.

Starburst. Starburst are pretty good, right? I'm going to do a red one. If I'm being honest, they last a little longer in my mouth than I'd like them to. Like I wish they were just a little bit faster, but the good flavor of her makes up for that. And we all know the pink ones the best. Pretty decent candy. At the end of the day, who doesn't love a good burst of flavor in their mouth? Am I right? I'm giving Starburst a C.

Hershey's Kiss up next. A Hershey's Kiss is boring as hell, right? I'm a fat [ __ ] so I always need more than one of these, and having to unwrap seven of them just doesn't make me feel good. Not my favorite thing in the world, and definitely a worse way to get the Hershey's chocolate. I'm giving a Hershey's kiss a D.

Uh-oh. Up next, we got the Rolos. I I don't I don't know what a Rolo is. Okay. And I I'm not going to learn today. E.

All right. Lint truffles. Lint. Lind. Lindit. Lindit. I don't know. I got to be honest. Does anyone actually really like these things or are they just what we eat when we want to feel like we're in the upper class? Like, I can't help but feel like a little prick when I'm eating one of these. Bunch of commercials are so [ __ ] patronizing. Like, bro, you you make a ball of chocolate. Shut the [ __ ] up. You're a Whopper with a nice wrapper on it. Like, come on. It's like lipstick on a pig and honestly, it's too rich for my taste. I'm giving Lynch truffles an E.

Ah, on the flip side, Charleston Chew is a working man's candy. These were invented exactly a century ago, and they're still chugging. You got vanilla flavored nougat on the inside, and you got chocolate on the outside. Pop them in the fridge, enjoy them cold. This is the best nouga candy out there. Charleston Shu, I'm giving an emphatic A.

Let's talk about York Peppermint Patties. My grandma loved York Peppermint Patties. And former New York Governor Andrew Cuomo's order to put CO patients in nursing homes resulted in the death of 15,000 seniors. Her included. Andrew Cuomo killed my grandmother. I actually don't care for these very much. I'm going to give them an F.

Up next, we have Junior Mints. My grandma also like Junior Mints, and they're a little fun. They're slightly better than York Peppermint Patties, but they're not good. That's why I'm going to give Junior Mints a D.

All right, Lifesavers, baby. The mint that saves your life if you start choking on it, cuz there's a little hole for you to breathe through. I don't know if that's true. That's just what I heard. Lifesavers are slightly better than Junior Mints. One time I ate a whole bag of these cuz I thought they were caloriefree. Turns out they're not. And now I'm 250 lbs. I'm giving Lifesavers a C. Pretty good mint.

And finally, Mentos. Mentos are slightly better than lifesavers, which by my calculation makes mentos the best mint candy out there. Also, they're fun to put in soda, which I'm not going to do right now. This setup is worth more than your life. My chair's $4,000. I'm not like you. I'm giving Mentos a B.

All right, here we go. Jolly Ranchers. The only thing worse than sucking on a Jolly Rancher is reading that story about him on Reddit. Please, under no circumstances should you ever Google Jolly Rancher Reddit, but if you must, pause the video right now, do it, and come back here. I'm so sorry. I'm giving Jolly Rancher an E.

Up next, we got Tootsie Rolls. I like Tootsie Rolls. Not just because I think they taste good, but because Tootsie Roll Industries, yes, that's the real name, Tootsie Roll Industries, is one of the few candy brands that's not owned by an evil conglomerate. Everything else is either Nestle or Mars or Ferrero or whatever the [ __ ] else. And Tootsie Roll is just kind of in the corner doing its own thing. They're unbothered. They're in their own lane. And you know what? They make a pretty good candy, too. I'm giving Tootsie Roll a B.

Here we go. Up next, we got Tootsie Pops. Tootsie Pops got to be my favorite lollipop, or as I and dozens of other people like to call them, suckers. Getting a Tootsie Roll at the end of a strenuous suck is a pretty good payoff. And it goes without saying that chocolate is by far the best flavor, but all of them are kind of good. Also, the commercial goes [ __ ] hard. A one, a two, a three. Tootsie pops. B.

Up next, Dum Dum Pops. Yay. Dum Dum Pops. Um, can I say something about these thing? You only get a Dum Dum Pop after you've been [ __ ] right? Like this is what you get after the dentist yanks five teeth out of your mouth. Or like after the barber [ __ ] your [ __ ] up so bad you got to wear a hat or after you get like a 4-year lease on a Charger with like a 20% APY. You know what I'm saying? Dum Dum Pops will forever be associated with terrible, terrible memories for me. I'm giving these guys an E. They're not that great.

All right, we're down to the final stretch. I got five candies left. Almond Joy, Kinder Bueno, Twix, Mounds, and KitKat. And between them, we got two Fs, two A's, and one S. Which ones do you think are getting the [Music] F? Let's talk about Twix. Twix is delicious. It's easily the best caramel base bar out there. The biscuit thing in the middle, it's unique. It's not in any other candy bar. The [ __ ] they pulled with the left Twix, right Twix thing, though, pissed me the [ __ ] off. Was too young to realize that it was a complete like joke. I'm going to give Twix an A.

Up next, Kinder Bueno. Baby. Kinder Bueno feels new to the scene, right? Like, these weren't around when we were little. I really wish they were, though. We got double wrapping on these guys for whatever reason. Seems kind of wasteful, but I can forgive it. The texture of this [ __ ] candy bar is phenomenal. You got some wafer action. You got the chocolate shell, and then you got this like hazelnut cream. It's like Nutella, but it's a lot lighter and a lot more pleasant. I absolutely love these [ __ ] things. But there's one candy that does it better. Kinder Bueno. A, you know what time it is. KitKat. KitKat, baby. Bar none. This is my favorite candy bar. Everything about it is perfect. The perfect amount of chocolate, the perfect consistency of the wafer, and the perfect tactile action when you bite into it. Kit Kat gets an S, baby. Amen.

That is it. This is my tier list of every candy known to man. If you disagree with anything here, let me know about it. Leave a little comment. I'm going to read every single one. That's a complete lie. I don't care. Thanks for watching. Click here to see more tier lists. I got a whole bunch of them. They're all going to piss you off, too. We got to get you home, buddy. [Music]