Transcription
Do you want to waste your whole life getting mad that pretty privilege exists, or do you want to start playing the game and learning how to use pretty privilege to your advantage? I'm gonna go with you want to start playing the game.
In this video, I'm going to teach you how it girls are it girls because they know that they can use their looks to their advantage. They use their looks to make life easier for them because nobody wants to purposely make their life harder. Nobody, not one person. Average doesn't mean that you're more humble and you're more modest; it means you're stupid.
It girls know this. It girls do not compare themselves to other women. They look themselves in the eye in the mirror, analyze their personal assets, their sexy uniqueness, and then they create a maintenance calendar to help uphold that image. This is also something I like to call becoming your own beauty standard, setting yourself as a standard and then continuing to meet it.
You need to have a maintenance calendar every single week, every single month, and follow that calendar based on what you see in the mirror. When you look at yourself and analyze yourself, you come up with your own personal assets. It's your own sexy uniqueness. You then take those things and you say, "Okay, because I might have this, this, this, then I need to do this, this, and this every week, every month, every two weeks." And that is how you build your own maintenance calendar, and this maintenance calendar is used to uphold your own beauty standard.
You are going to stop comparing yourself to the other women that you see that you find so beautiful. You are instead going to look at yourself as the most beautiful person in the world. The standard that you set for yourself as your own beauty standard is your most beautiful, best version of yourself. You look at yourself and you say, "These are the best things about me. These are the most beautiful things about me. That is going to be my beauty standard, and this is how I'm going to uphold that image and maintain and meet my beauty standard of myself."
You need to have tunnel vision when it comes to this part of your life, okay? You cannot be looking here, there, and everywhere and seeing how beautiful that girl is, and if only you looked like that, you'd be more beautiful, and you'd be more confident, and guys would like you more, and people would treat you better. That is a victim mentality, and we don't do victimhood over here. We are going to look at ourselves. We're going to have tunnel vision, and we are only going to see ourselves as the most beautiful thing in the world.
Then we are going to reinforce this beauty standard within ourselves. Being able to do this means that you stop identifying yourself as ugly. You stop labeling yourself as ugly. There are women, maybe one percent of women, there are natural tens. Not every woman is like that. Most women are not natural tens, okay? So instead of saying, "I'm ugly because I was born with a lot of facial hair. I'm ugly because I was born this skin color. I'm ugly because I was born with a unibrow and a mustache, and I'm ugly because I was born with ears out to here," you're looking at those things as things that are your downfall. When you identify as ugly, you continue to condition your brain to uphold that image.
In this video, we're talking about how to uphold your own standard of beauty. You look in the mirror, you outline your personal assets, you then create a routine to maintain that image of yourself. You meet that standard. You don't meet the standard of society. You don't meet the standard of this girl, this blonde girl, this brown girl, whatever it is. You meet your own standard of beauty.
But right now, you might be looking at yourself and identifying as ugly, and then your brain is now starting to uphold that image. So you're gonna say, "Well, I have a unibrow, so I might as well just leave it there. Well, I have a mustache, so I might as well just leave it there. Well, I'm this skin color, so I'm ugly. I'm not getting guys. I'm ugly." You're identifying with the ugliness. Instead, you can choose to identify with the beautiful, the sexy.
So when you continue to identify as ugly, when you continue to label yourself as ugly, you're conditioning to upholding that image. It is translated through your habits. You become lazy. You don't feel the need to brush your hair because you're ugly. You don't feel the need to put on a nice outfit because you're ugly. You don't feel the need to wax your mustache because it's there, you're ugly anyway, what's the difference? You choose to be ugly by identifying as ugly, and then your brain is going to start producing actions that help uphold that image of ugly. You gotta cut that out.
I am unconventionally attractive. Brown-skinned women are not the beauty standard, okay? Short, petite women are not the beauty standard. But then I became my own beauty standard. So I looked in the mirror and I said, "I got this, this, and this. What can I do to enhance those things?" I plucked my eyebrows. I waxed my unibrow. I waxed off my mustache. It lasered off all my hair. I literally had a connecting beard. I could have said, "Well, I was born like this, so I'm just gonna stick with it." Because if I don't, then that means I'm catfishing people. Because if I don't roll out of bed looking like a 10, well then there's no point me putting effort into my appearance because that means I'm catfishing people. If I roll out of bed looking like a five, brush my hair, and I put myself together, put on a nice outfit, now I'm a seven or an eight. Well, I'm catfishing people, so I can't do that. I need to be a natural beauty. I need to be like my most natural self.
Because that means authenticity. That'll mean authenticity. That'll mean you roll out of bed looking like a four or five, put yourself together and make yourself a seven or eight. Even if you don't roll out of bed looking like that seven or that eight, that doesn't matter. That does not mean you're a catfish. It just means that you've identified your weaknesses and you're going to correct your weaknesses. You're going to help camouflage your weaknesses. That's not being a catfish, that's being smart.
I made a choice to be hot. I looked at myself and I said, "This is how you're going to be hot. You are going to change the color of your hair. You are going to identify as hot, and then you are going to create a routine that helps you manufacture that image." When I had black hair, I didn't feel hot. I might have looked good, but I didn't feel hot. It didn't feel like my best version. And then I got highlights, and that felt like my best version. So then I continued to uphold that version of myself. I continue to get highlights. I continue to maintain this hair color because for me, it's what makes me feel the most hot. It makes me feel like I'm upholding that image of hot for myself.
I could have chosen to keep all those things that I thought that were weaknesses, the things that make me ugly, like the hair on my face. And this is all personal, might be cute to you, but it's not cute to me. Facial hair is not cute to me. So I could have chose to be like, "Yeah, I've already lost. This is a losing game." I looked in the mirror. I chose to be hot. Discard what needed to go. Elevate what was already there, what was already sexy. The enhancements that needed to come. And then I became the best version of myself.
When you roll out of bed looking like a five, and then you turn into a seven when you walk out of the door because you put on a cute outfit, you've brushed your hair, you've enhanced your natural beauty by putting on a little bit of makeup, you put on some perfume, you get that confident energy, you get that magnetic energy because you look at yourself and you're like, "Damn, I look good today." That's not catfishing, that's called enhancement.
We live in a world where the resources around us to make us look better than when we woke up are around us. And if we choose to not use those things because we're scared of being called a catfish, you're just playing a losing game. You're being stupid. You have to become opportunistic when it comes to your appearance. You have to use your appearance to your advantage. Everyone is doing it. So we need to stop reinforcing this idea that if you weren't born a natural 10, then there's no use in trying. Then there's no use in putting effort into appearance. If you weren't born a natural 10, then it's best to accept fate and just accept mediocrity and just continue going on as ugly. No, we are choosing to be hot. We are choosing to be hot because we have that choice.
Perception is reality. You have to get comfortable being seen. When you are afraid of being seen, you withhold from what you have to share in this world. You withhold from your purpose. You withhold from sharing the insights that you have in your mind. You feel like you have nothing to contribute to conversations, so you don't say anything. And then that in itself creates this perception of you of, "Oh, well, she's really shy. She's really awkward. She doesn't have social skills." But you might be really social. You might have those skills, but because you're afraid of being seen and you're afraid of putting all those things on display, you hide. You recluse. You just want to feel average because being average is easier. Being average makes you less open to judgments and to criticisms and less open to haters. But like we all know, if you don't have haters, you're doing something wrong in this life.
We live, you have to be your most authentic, best, best, juiciest self, and you have to be okay with putting that all on display and being okay showing the world who you are. This person might not like you, but that's okay because you stay true to who you are. You set yourself as a standard. So when you set yourself as a standard, you are motivated by upholding that standard for yourself. That is when you can truly be your authentic self and really lean into being seen and being visible.
When you look a hot mess on the outside because you've chosen to be ugly, you've chosen to give in to fate and your mediocrity and just what you were born with, you reduce the value of your words. You might have the most amazing mind, the most beautiful creativity, you're so intelligent, you're so smart, you're articulate in your words, but nobody listens to you because the vessel that these things are coming out of looks disheveled. You look like a hot mess. You don't take care of yourself. The personal landscaping is unattended to. The personal landscaping is neglected.
I use this example in a previous video. Go watch it right here. The audio sucks, I apologize. Hopefully, this audio is better. But I said that if the landscaping on a house is awful, what is going to make you think the inside is any better? It might look really good on the inside, but nobody's going to go inside to see that beauty if the outside looks like garbage. If the outside is not taken care of, because nobody wants to give time and effort and energy into something or someone who doesn't give time, energy, and effort into themselves into maintaining their outside appearance.
We live in a world where appearance, beauty, they all matter. These things are of importance because humans are visual creatures. We have a visual sense first and foremost before any of our other senses can be activated. So if we are failing to play into that sense first, no other senses are going to be activated in somebody else. Nobody is going to give you the time and the energy that you want. You have to put your appearance on display first and play to the visual all sense in somebody first before they will even consider giving you their other senses or they consider listening to you. Nobody's going to give you attention or time or effort or their personal resources and energy if you look like you don't even give those things to yourself.
There exists a correlation between inside and outside. People will look at people who don't look good, who don't prioritize their appearance, who looks shabby, who just look like they've just rolled out of bed and accepted their fate and said, "Yep, this is what I look like. I'm going with it." People look at people like that and say, "Something's going on inside." Because inside reflects outside. How we feel about ourselves inside is directly correlated to our outside appearance. They're automatically making the assumption that your inside needs work. And people who are assumed to be unconfident, to lack self-identity, those people are usually avoided because those people are automatically assumed to be more work, to be more mental energy I gotta give you so many words of affirmation for you to just feel good. I don't want to give my energy and time to somebody like that because that's just a lot of effort.
It's your personal responsibility to cultivate confidence within yourself and identity within yourself. You have to build the skill of presenting your inside world to your outside world through your appearance because visual is what is captured first. When you walk out of your place, when you walk into a room, you are not speaking. It's your non-verbal body language. It's the way that you're presenting yourself. It's the way that you're carrying yourself that is sending that signal to somebody to be like, "Hey, I want to get to know that person more." And then a conversation comes, and that is what makes you an it girl. Present your insight, all of your intelligence, all of your wit, all of your sarcasm, all of your confidence and your magnetism without actually having to say a word. And you do that by working on the outside. You do that by becoming your own beauty standard and setting yourself as a standard and just upholding that because that's where your personal magnetism comes in.
You are your most magnetic when you are your most authentic. And not in the way of, "Oh, I woke up and I look like a four, so that means authenticity. I have to just go into the world looking like a four because that's just who I am. I'm a natural four. I'm accepting that." No, true authenticity means you assess yourself. You analyze your personal strengths, your personal weaknesses. You play up to those things. You discard certain things. You become the best version of yourself. You learn how to put that on display without saying a single word. Being able to carry a conversation, being able to contribute to the conversation, being able to have an opinion, being confident in your uniqueness, that is authenticity.
So becoming your own beauty standard really comes down to not giving your power away to things that you cannot control. And instead, taking your power from the things that you can control. The things that you categorically will never be able to change about yourself is your skin color and your race. Those are things that you might be using right now as the reason why you have to choose to be ugly. "I'm ugly because I'm dark skin. I'm ugly because I'm this racial background. I'm ugly because nobody likes Indian women. I'm ugly because of this." Those are all excuses, and we're not doing excuses anymore. Those things are your superpowers. You're a dark-skinned woman, okay? Well, that's your superpower. That's what makes you unique. And in that lies your magnetism. And your uniqueness lies your magnetism. So we're gonna use that to our advantage.
The things that you can control are the things that you're going to get rid of. You can control your weight. Go to the gym. 95% of things that you look at yourself and use in as excuse as to why you're ugly and why you'll never have pretty privilege and why that girl is just better than you, those are 95% of things that you're using as an excuse that you can change. You can change your weight. You can change your hair color. You can change how much facial hair you have on your face. You can change your confidence. You can change every single thing about you other than your ethnicity, your racial background, and your skin color.
You are your own Tinder swindler. You're swindling yourself out of confidence. You are swindling yourself out of mega magnetism and beauty and pretty privilege because you're choosing to be a victim. You're choosing to say and condition yourself to believe that you are not attractive. You are not hot. You can't be an it girl because you are not the beauty standard that gets pushed by media. You are not the beauty standard that you see on billboards or that you see in movies. You're not the girl next door. You're swindling yourself out of your own personal magnetism. You're accepting people's opinions and judgments as fact, as concrete. You're letting them swindle you out of your confidence and your magnetism because you are allowing what they think to change your perception of yourself. Their perception is their reality, but it doesn't have to be yours.
Your perception is your reality. So when you look in the mirror, what are you choosing to perceive as beautiful? Are you choosing to perceive Megan Fox's beautiful, and then when you look in the mirror, you don't see that? So now your perception is, "I am not beautiful because I'm not Megan Fox." And I think Megan Fox is amazingly hot. When you become your own beauty standard, you change your perception of beautiful to being yourself. That is what becoming your own beauty standard means. Means making your perception of self the most amazing, the most beautiful, and making that your reality. Because perception is a reality. What you perceive to be true, what you perceive to think about yourself, what you perceive to look at as beautiful becomes your reality. That becomes what you, what you experience. So what are you choosing to perceive?
Let other people have a perception that is different than yours without it impacting the way that you think of yourself. You are not everybody's type. I am not everybody's type. That does not mean that we are not an it girl. We are an it girl because we chose to be an it girl. We are an it girl because we put time and effort into maintaining the aesthetic of an it girl, meaning we put time and effort into cultivating a confident mind, a confident energy, a magnetic energy, a magnetic aura. We put time and effort into looking the part and playing that part.
So the moment that you start giving into this game and actually use it to your advantage is the moment that you start winning in life, and everything will become so much easier because you're not fighting against the current, you're swimming with it. If you like this video, subscribe. I'll see you in my next one. Bye.