Transcription
Trump's new disclosure forms show he's raked in billions off the presidency and yet still can't afford convincing hand makeup. Truly boggles the mind. This is just another day.
Right now, millions of Americans around the country are struggling financially. But one possible reason for all this hardship is that they are simply in the wrong line of work.
Newly released financial disclosure forms show President Trump made more than $1.4 billion in cryptocurrency related income last year.
See, if you want to conquer your affordability problem, the answer is simple. Just become president of the United States. Yep. Turns out that if you spend all of your time in the oval orchestrating revolutionary amounts of corruption while simultaneously screwing over the voters who elected you because you said you would do the exact opposite, the presidency can be quite the lucrative occupation. Not that Donald Trump knows anything about that.
"I don't get involved in my personal. We have funds that run my money."
"But you are benefiting. We're talking."
"Well, I've made a lot of money before I became president and they invest my money and I don't talk to them. I never I don't even speak to them. So, I have many people I don't know what they call closed accounts or something. You put your money in and that's it. I don't talk to them. They're big institutions. I think it's called a blind account, but they basically they take it and I purposely I never speak to any of the people that run the money, but they're at big institutions and uh they invest in whatever they invest."
Trump doesn't even know what this whole money thing is anyway. To him, it's just zeros and ones, just a bunch of confusing slips of paper sprinkled with green ink and portraits of dead guys. That's why he's pushing to have bills with his face on them. That's at least something that he can understand.
My god, it takes a gargantuan set of balls to pretend like jumping from $622 million to $2.2 billion in one year is just a financial fluke. But to be fair, he's had practice.
The latest pardon was for a cryptocurrency tycoon, who is known as CZ. The company CZ founded, Binance, helped boost the profile of the Trump family's crypto firm, World Liberty Financial. In 2025, his crypto exchange, Binance, helped facilitate a $2 billion purchase of World Liberty Financial's stable coin and then you pardon CZ. How do you address the appearance of pay-for-play?
"Well, here's the thing. I know nothing about it because I'm too busy doing the other."
"Too busy doing the other." He doesn't even have the decency to come up with a reasonable excuse for his corruption. That's like Jeffrey Dahmer saying, "I couldn't have killed and eaten those people. I was too busy with my stuff and the things and all of my other plans."
Donald Trump and his family consistently pretend to be stupid and unaware of how anybody turns a profit. And on top of that, they think that makes them relatable.
"What we have heard, former President Trump and his family, especially Eric Trump and Don Jr., his sons, they have touted this as a way for typical American households to invest in cryptocurrency. So, it could be a platform kind of like a crypto bank where you would buy and sell crypto assets."
Yep. Just your typical American household. It's almost quaint when you think about it. Sort of like the American Gothic painting, only if behind them was their dad's billion-dollar retrofitted private jet gifted to him by the Amir. Very baseball and apple pie. Am I right?
But my favorite part of him pretending that he doesn't understand finance and business is that him understanding finance and business was the entire rationale for why the American people should elect him.
"My whole life I've been greedy, greedy, greedy. I've grabbed all the money I could get. I'm so greedy. But now I want to be greedy for the United States. I want to grab all that money."
Yes, you'll be shocked to learn that the guy who used the phrase, "My whole life I've been greedy, greedy, greedy, I've grabbed all the money I could," would indeed continue to be greedy, greedy, greedy, and grab all the money he could. Almost as mystifying as the fact that those hippos are still hungry, hungry.
But if there's one thing I think we all know about greedy people, it is their overwhelming desire to spread the wealth around. I mean, who can forget how after this speech,
"Greed, for lack of a better word, is good."
Gordon Gecko set up his world-famous orphanage and soup kitchen. Donald Trump is using every lever of power at his disposal to rake in billions and continues to pretend like we're all experiencing the same windfall.
"Well, you know why I'm profiting? Cuz the stock market's going up. Everybody's profiting. If you have a Do you have a 401k? How's your 401k done? It's about up 85%. Thank you, President Trump. You know what? We're sorry. Here we are taking issue with a guy who's just had a little bit of luck in the stock market when we should really be sending him a thank you card for letting us all benefit by the same amount."
I guess the only issue is everything he's saying is First of all, his 401k numbers are off. According to the data, a growing share of Americans are withdrawing 401k dollars before retirement to cope with unexpected hardships. But beyond that, Donald Trump himself has tripled his net worth, meaning an increase of about 300%. Meanwhile, since he took office, the Dow is up 18%. So, when he says that we're all experiencing the same windfall, those numbers don't quite add up. Although, I suppose I shouldn't be surprised. This is just another instance of Trump claiming that things are over 18.
But at least Donald Trump isn't being too showy with his grift.
"So, this will be the first flight of what I think is maybe the greatest commercial plane ever built. I said to Boeing, 'What's the best one?' They said, 'This is the best plane ever built.' And you can do two things. You can lowkey it or you can show it. And I think the country should be very proud of it."
Wow, what a surprise. For a second there, I was sure that the guy who gets an erection every time he mentions his gold-encrusted ballroom was going to lowkey it. Honestly, I think looting our government to pay for his vanity projects is the only thing that sexually satisfies this man.
"Now, as I see my two beautiful sons sitting there, I think I'm going to give one to myself, one to them, and we'll have a threesome. Okay."
I stand corrected. Wow, I never thought I would see the day when Donald Trump spoke so openly about another one of his children. But back to Donald Trump's new plane. America's New Gift, which cost taxpayers a billion dollars to retrofit. Turns out it actually has an adorable backstory.
"And I went to Qatar. I said, 'I'd like to use it for a period of time because the other ones, as you know, are under construction. They'll be here in 2 years.' And because, you know, the plane is 35 years old. So, I said, 'I'd like to use it.' And uh the Amir Tamim, who's a great gentleman, he said, 'No, no. I'd like to make a contribution to the country.'"
And isn't that just so generous, the Amir doing something like that out of the goodness of his heart? I mean, he must have been so surprised when not long after Trump's company signed a massive deal to build a resort in, of all places, Qatar. It's like, what are the odds? That's like betting that Cash Patel is going to show up to your meeting drunk. Talk about a long shot.
But the good news is this is why we have journalists to hold elected officials to account when they are engaging in blatantly corrupt entanglements with foreign governments.
"In terms of the Air Force One, I I always loved the traditional blue and silver aircraft, but I got to say that red, white, and blue paint job on the new one is very striking. Looks very, very presidential and looks very, very powerful."
Wow. Shocking to be able to hear him describe the paint job while simultaneously giving Trump a But Trump loves to boast about how all American families are benefiting equally from his presidency. Unfortunately, it's pretty clear that some families are doing better than others.
The billion-dollar mining deal we just found out between Trump and Kazakhstan that Trump's sons stand to profit from, according to the New York Times. And the New York Times goes on to report that there are at least 14 companies, 14 tied to Trump and uh Howard Lutnick, his commerce secretary's sons. Steve Wickoff's official title is Middle East Envoy, but President Trump simply calls him my dear friend.
Joining me now is one of the men behind the digital token, World Liberty Financial Co-founder, Zack Witoff, also the CEO.
I mean, my god, this is just like Succession, except there's no jokes and all the episodes are decades long. Not that his administration officials see it that way.
"There was this story this week, too, about his sons making money off a deal in Kazakhstan. What's the White House's position on all these questions?"
"Well, I think the president said it best. And let's remember, Bill, why Americans elected this president to office? Because he was an outsider who was tremendously successful in business, built a New York City skyline. Uh, and that's what Americans wanted. They wanted a businessman in office."
Yeah, they did. So, he could make our lives easier, not just his. This would be like hiring a house painter who just ends up painting their own house.
The reality is all of Trump's self-dealing and blatant corruption would be bad enough unto itself. But to be doing it while Americans are hurting because of his policies make this all the more deplorable. He knows how much people are suffering. He knows the cost of groceries and housing and healthcare and gasoline have skyrocketed under his watch. But he doesn't care, which is beyond reprehensible considering he campaigns specifically on making things more affordable. People can't go out and buy cereal or bacon or eggs or anything else. These the people of our country are absolutely dying with what they've done. They've destroyed the economy. This man pitched himself as America's savior. Sorry, doctor. But it was all a ploy to occupy the presidency, not for governance, but for profiteering.
And with all of this abundant evidence of his daily ethics violations and continuous cases of self-dealing, who are the ones that we're told over and over are stealing from Americans? It's Democrats in blue states. It's lazy SNAP recipients. It's illegal immigrants. These are the true culprits of American grift, not the billionaire tax cheats holding clandestine crypto dinners. It is all a shell game. A nefarious attempt to distract the public so Trump, his sons, and the rest of the Epstein class friends can continue to make themselves rich while the rest of us suffer. It is just a shame we never saw this as a possible reality.
"My whole life I've been greedy, greedy, greedy."
Yep. Never could have imagined.
Before you go, I'm very excited to announce that I've written a new book titled The Day After: How to Wield Power in a Post-Trump World. The book explores what is, in my opinion, the single most important theme that we're dealing with in politics today and moving forward. Power. Specifically, how Republicans abuse it and how Democrats refuse to wield it. This book explains how we got here and more importantly, how we should finally wield power if we're fortunate enough to get it back. It is the blueprint for progressives who want to do far more than just restore the status quo. Please pre-order today by visiting the link in the episode description or go to brianttylercohen.com/book. You can grab yours from any of the major retailers like Amazon or Barnes & Noble, or find an independent bookstore closest to you that's also listed on that website. Thanks so much for supporting Independent Media.