Transcription
There is a lot of buzz about manhood and womanhood, but in general, manhood is a hot topic. There are hot takes; there are extreme takes; there are weak takes as well. Maybe people aren't teaching enough about what the Bible says and aren't strong enough on it. Yeah, what are some of the big misconceptions that this generation is being sold?
Yeah, I think as far as like the misconceptions regarding masculinity, I think part of it is a reaction to the radical feminism that has infiltrated our culture and our church at times. And then there's the swing to the other side of the pendulum that's full of machismo and hypermasculinity. And I think a lot of people would say, "Well, the swinging of the pendulum to this hypermasculinity, the latter is better than the former," and I would say, "Well, neither are biblical," so we need to look at what the scripture says in that regard.
I think when we're approaching the topic of masculinity, we have to understand that biblically speaking, it's far more than beards and barbells; it's something else. And it can include those things, I um, but it has to be looking at the person of Jesus Christ. So if Jesus was the godliest, most manliest man in a biblical sense that ever lived, we have to look at his his character and his conduct to determine what that was.
So I think, first of all, if you're looking at the life of Jesus, masculinity as defined by scripture is meekness. Amen. Meekness is not a groveling; it's not a spineless weak man. Meekness, biblically speaking, is strength under control. So I think when we think about meekness from a cultural perspective, we think of a guy that just gets trampled. And there is an element where the the real man doesn't try to establish his masculinity; it's strength under control.
And I think, secondly, it'd be a level of servant-hearted nature of Christ. He was a servant and says in Mark that he did not come to be served but to serve and to give his life as a ransom. Meaning that real men don't go around going, "I'm a man; you should serve me." They view it as their god-given responsibility and privilege to serve other people. And we see that this servant heart in nature also is reflected in sacrifice. Jesus was the sacrifice for sinners. I think I wrote something else down. Yeah, even when you think about Jesus, he was gentle and kind. I think we think about manliness and we think of gruff, aloof. Jesus was a friend of sinners and put children on his lap.
Yeah, and I think I, you know, I always think about that because even when you've been around, if you've ever been around someone that's more popular and you see people swarming an individual, you go, "Man, give them some space," but Jesus was giving with his time; he was gentle; he was kind. And I think the ultimate mark of a man is that Jesus was tempted in every way we were tempted, yet without sin. So I think when you're thinking about the manliness of Christ, it has to include that he was meek, strength under control, that he was humble, he was gentle, and he was kind; he was sacrificial; he was servant-hearted; and he obeyed God.
So I think my encouragement to people today, if they're trying to look, even sadly, I think the many Christian, you know, influencers or categories, if you want to be a manly man, you don't have to look at the contrast of the trajectory of our culture; you have to look at the scripture. So don't look at the world to find out what a manly man is; you look to Jesus Christ in his word and you ask God through his Spirit to conform you into the image of Christ, then you'll be a man of men. Yeah.
Do you think there's an appeal that is good and right? And I'm going to name some names here for fun. I mean, you got the Joe Rogan, more of that; it's a more bravado, but but an intellectual bravado, and and he can be helpful. You listen to him and you go, "Oh, Joe makes some good points," you know, there's grains of truth in it, not saying biblically, but he'll make true points about life or about work or about culture. Um, maybe another one is your, you know, your David Goggins guy running around and doing like his jogs and looking at the camera and go like, "Stay hard," and tell it, yeah, telling man, you know, your Jocko Willink, and obviously, you know, Peterson is the the most famous with this Canadian accent it sounds like, but that would be uh, maybe a small sampling of today's cultural man.
Why don't we add in for good measure, Liver King pre-steroid bust, you know, all of attacking it's like carnivore diet, mixed martial arts, being fit, "I am a hunter, I love to hunt, and I enjoy it, and I have a beard," and you like to lift, and we all played sports. I used to agree; you used to have a mustache, you know, all of that. So all for the the basic definitions maybe of what a man would look like, masculine-looking type of things, is there a danger in all of this? Because there are threads of truth that draw us in because we're tired of weak and passive, feminized versions of masculinity, and that's the draw. And do you think that it's also linked to biblical illiteracy that in it all, this is my hypothesis, I'm asking you to chime in on, maybe I'm wrong, that all of that is appealing because it's very dominant and aggressive, and it's, "I'm going to do this and and this over here," because men are spiritually lazy. There's been spiritually lazy sitting and giving themselves to the scriptures doesn't seem as brawny, yeah, and as aggressive, but a real man, you mentioned holiness, Christ's obedience, what would you encourage men to do if you if they're tempted to this, you know, brand of masculinity that can be good and helpful, and it does appeal to the testosterone-filled man, but we leave out the study of the scriptures and the emphasis on on a quiet life of holiness? Speak to that.
Yeah, no, I think that's a great question because I think there are elements of truth within those categories. I mean, the average guy in America is like 42 pounds overweight, you know, so is that good to exercise and get in shape? Well, yeah, absolutely, because your body is a temple; that's something scripture informs me, not something some man coach is gonna for me on. Yeah, I think most people um need to go, "Man, I need to seriously consider the food that I eat and the exercise that I implement to my life," but that's not because I'm trying to be a manly man; that's because I'm trying to be a good steward, amen, of the body God has given me.
In regards to how you dress, yeah, I think there's a lot of things, and you would maybe be able to devil's advocate and say, "Well, this is cultural," but I always respond to that and saying, even how we dress, so sometimes people go, "Well, you know, 400 years ago they wore skirts, mended, or whatever, or they wear kilts," yeah, they weren't kilts, you know, William Wallace was a savage and he was wearing a skirt. I always look at that and go, "Well, God has placed us in a context and in the culture, and there are things within our context and culture that give the vibe of feminism." We're we're in a different world than them. So I think even, I was talking, this is just an example, one of the things that young guys do now that are in the music scene, I see music pastors doing this more and more, is they paint their guitar nails.
I've seen that. Yeah, it's becoming more and more of a thing; they paint them black, and it's just a way for them to express themselves. I would be able to make a cultural argument from scripture because you'd be able to say the same thing regarding language: "Hey, this word in English is a cuss word, but over here it means nothing." Yeah, well, in Ephesians 4, it gives credence to the reality that certain cultures understand words to be offensive. That's right. And certain cultures also understand certain ways of dress and uh, adornment to be feminine. So when you paint your nails, for 90, 99 of the world, that is a feminine thing that you're doing. So I would look at guys and say, "Cut that out," you know, "paint your nails, girls paint their nails, my mom paints their nails, you don't." So I think there's a real element of that where you're going, "Um, hey, you need to really consider the vibe that you're putting off," but I'm also trying to make that as far as much as possible rooted in scripture, yeah, and not just kind of like, "Oh, that strikes me off, be a man." Yeah, it strikes me.
But I think there's real almonds like guys need to, I mean, we talk about the same thing with guys that even talk feminine, you know, they would say, "Maybe I'm just," this is a way I I talk, and it's like, "Well, I think that there's a thing that should be addressed in that regard where older men should come alongside other men and say, 'Hey, this I I'm not sure if you're aware of this, but sometimes the way that you talk sounds a certain way,' and I think that's something guys in the church should be um, interacting and conversing on, but I think it should be done in love, and I think it should be done with the aim of not just presenting a guy as a man but for pushing him to model Christ." So good, so good. So it's okay, we can tell man, yeah, "Be a man, grow up, absolutely, get a job, get a job, work hard, you look like a good dressing like that, quit talking like that," absolutely. And then you put your your veering toward, and I think this is your dad, I'm a dad, when the first thing that comes to mind is not behavior modification but heart transformation. Yeah, I'm going for the heart of Christ; I'm going for a life of holiness; I'm going for a spiritual angle here, and yeah, will the behaviors modify in that? Sure, yeah, you know, our babies need to obey and grow up to become obedient children, but in the end, that's a lot of a lot of wisdom I think for people listening and a whole generation that's being sold a bag of goods on masculinity that is reminds me of a lot of different kind of caricatures, like just to present one that is the old joke again, it's just a character, but you get the really short guy who buys the really high lifted truck, and the joke is, "Oh, what's he, you know, he's trying to compensate for his shortness or whatever," and that's not a slight to short people; it would be a caricature of culture.
I think we've got a lot of men in the church today that are looking for a way in for their relevance, and they're looking to make a splash, and for a long time they haven't been able to do it in other ways, and now if you go online and you'll bark about manhood and you tell guys to do this or do that or you make a big deal, it it's drawing a group of men that are just tired of passive, weak, feminized manhood, and instead of looking to Christ, they're looking at these other human metrics.
I think it's revelatory too in this this manliness conversation, especially in the way that they're framing in a Christian world, the way that a wife functions in relation to her husband, yeah, because wives biblically do submit to their husbands, but I've never had to preach that to my wife over and over again. It's like a man coming in saying, "I'm the head of this home, and you will obey it," you're like, "You're not the leader." I rarely hear um, the godly men that I know that I look at as models of masculinity are never having to assert, no, that they run the home and that the wife is submitting to them. And so I think even, obviously, that's a good thing to teach through biblically, of course, that's Ephesians, you teach through that there needs to be an understanding of biblical roles, but it's just like it'd be a like a coach and a huddle saying, "I'm the coach, run my play, coach of this team." Yeah, so I think that there's an element where that can be also taken to an extreme that isn't Christ-like, because the model of our submission is Christ, and he's not asserting himself over and over again; he's a model of sacrifice and love, and that gives an inevitable um, desire to submit to his leadership because of all that he's done for us. So I think it's um, that can be misconstrued as well. [Music]