Transcription
What is going on beautiful people? Today we're going to be talking about how the narcissist ex can actually be their new supply. If you're new here, my name is Lee Hammock. I'm a clinically diagnosed narcissist and welcome to episode 987 of The Narcissist [Music] Code. Bam! 987 episodes, y'all. What in the world? What are we doing here? What are we actually doing here? 987 times I sat in front of this camera and hit that and said, "I'm if you're new here, I'm a diagnosed narcissist." T for narcissist. Welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome. I'm grateful for y'all. I am. I'm super grateful for y'all. I'm so grateful for y'all.
I'm starting a new YouTube channel just for reactions and longer videos and things like that as well. So the link is, uh, at the bottom of my YouTube page. It's called Lee Actions, Lee.actions. You, reactions, Lee Actions. So make sure you follow that and subscribe to that channel. Um, but yes, y'all, the narcissist's new supply isn't always new. The narcissist's new supply doesn't have to be a new person. It could be somebody from the, it could be a blast from the past, some ass from the past, some ass from the past. If y'all want to get, you know, if you want to make it rhyme correctly. Um, but yeah, that's that. It can absolutely happen within that space right there.
Narcissistic people, y'all can absolutely, absolutely go back to their ex and treat them like a new supply. The ex that they bashed, the ex that they told, told you were crazy, the ex that they said they would never, ever go back to, the ex that they said was like the most horrible person in the world. They can go back to those exes and, and it doesn't matter how long ago it was either, y'all. Let's just say this could be the ex before the ex that you met, you know? Because times change, people don't. Times change, but people don't. People don't always change, y'. People stay. The behaviors can stay the same.
But this is how narcissistic people can get their ex back. A lot of times, if enough time has passed by, they assume that the p, the pi, the people from their past think that they have changed. Well, it's been five years, we dated. I'm pretty sure that person has matured by now. It's been a year since we dated. It's been so long since we dated or been married, since we've been divorced. I'm pretty sure that person has changed by now because I've changed. People change in seven years. You see what I'm saying? They can convince their ex that they've changed into a new person.
And of course, like I said, the ex has probably, the ex has probably healed and grown. So the ex is probably a new person now. The ex presents as a new person because the ex has grown and might, maybe healed from this toxic relationship. But they got wrapped back into it. So there, the ex has grown into a new person. So that ex can be the new supply. You see, you see how that works right there? It's not always a new person. The ex can have healed and grown and their life could have changed.
Because a lot of times, this is what happens in toxic relationships. A lot of times, y'all, and some of y'all have already experienced this, some of y'all will experience this. Um, when you leave a toxic relationship, you glow and you grow. Like, you, your life gets better. A lot of times when you leave, once you get to that patch of just healing and growth and pain, and it's going to hurt, yeah, I'm not saying it's always going to be easy. But once you get to that initial patch of healing and growing, like you feel better. Like you feel like you, you grow. You, you start doing things that you feel like you couldn't have done when you were still with this person, right? You feel like you start doing, like you feel like you have the ability to grow now. The opportunity for growth. Like you start working out. The person that you were with said that you couldn't go to the gym, right? But now you go to the gym, you work out, you lose weight, you, you, your body changes, you, you, you change. You see, like you change who you are. Things have changed since y'all been together. Like, like you glow up. You, like you really do. You really do have a glow-up journey. You might actually even look different. You lost weight, you might have gained a little weight, you might have put on some muscle, you might have changed or cut your hair, you might have grew your hair out, you might have dyed your hair, you might change your hairstyle, you might dress differently, you might have more money, you might have more access to more money, more education. You see, you've went through a glow-up because you've gotten out of this toxic relationship. Like you were, a lot of y'all were, a lot of y'all have experienced that and a lot of y'all will experience that if you decide, you know, to leave and glow up.
I'm not saying you can't glow up while you're in the toxic relationship, but I just feel like it's hard to glow up. I'm not saying your life is over. I'm not, like, I don't try to bring doom and gloom to people's lives, y'all. I promise you, I don't. I try to help be a light that can shine through the darkness to show you that there's, you know, there's better out there for you. And I don't mean by better person, I mean you can be a better person. You can heal, you can grow, you know? But I'm just saying though, but it's harder for a rose to grow, you know? It's harder for a flower to grow through a crack in a concrete than it is for them to grow in a garden. Oh, where do I come up with this stuff at, y'all? Where did that just come from? What did that, where did that just come from? Even though a flower can grow through that crack in the sidewalk, it's easier if it was planted in a garden. What is this? What do these analogies come from, y'all? Where did it come from? That was fire too. Yeah.
Look, you, yeah, look, if you like that analogy, you have to drop a flow in the comment section. Just any, any type of flower. What I, yeah, I really don't know where this comes from. Um, but yeah, so when you are on your glow-up journey, like you glow up, you leave a toxic relationship, you glow up, and sometimes that narcissistic person sees it and comes back into your life. And when they swoop back into your life, you're a new person. They're still the same person. They might have, you might have seemed, they might have seemed like they've changed. You've definitely changed. So you're a new person. You are the new supply. You're the ex, but you're also the new supply. You're in a different space in life. Things have changed. You see?
Well, sometimes they can spin the block. They can come back like when you go through, go through a glow-up journey or growth journey and you no longer have that narcissistic person in your life. You see how it works right there, y'all? Y'all see it? Y'all experienced it? Like, it's possible. So I'm telling people like the narcissist sometimes goes back to their ex that has glown up, you know, that has grown up, that like you've changed, like you done, like their ex has done everything the narcissist told them that, that they couldn't do. The narcissist ex has told them, like the narcissist ex has go went and gone and done all the things that the narcissist has told you that you can't do. Do has convinced you that whatever you want to do is bad and damaging to the relationship. You know, they've got a new support system, got new friends, a new family, new job, new city, whatever it is. They've told you that you can't do that. They've convinced you that you can't do that. They've tried to intentionally hold you back or sabotage your life. You see? They've done all this stuff to you by, by and simultaneously tried to hold you back. But the, but their ex has gotten free of that and has healed and has grown. And sometimes, y'all, when you healing, grow, sometimes you do go back in the toxic relationship. I'm not saying you, yeah, when you heal and grow and you leave a toxic relationship, you, it is possible to get back into one with the same person. I've seen it happen. Yeah, I've seen it happen so many times, y'all.
I'm working, y', I got so many things, so, so many things going on behind the scenes to help people heal and grow. It is crazy. So make sure you join my newsletter if you already have it. The link is in the description of every video and podcast I do. Join my newsletter. I have some courses, some video series coming out that are going to be super powerful. Um, but yes, y'all, like if you're with a narcissist and they start acting shady, and sometimes, y', like I know a lot, one of the questions people going to have is like, how is the, how is the ex still around? Sometimes the ex shouldn't be still around because they have no, no further connection to the ex, right? But sometimes the narcissist ex is around because they have kids together. So they, they, they, they are still contact. They still, they're still connected through the kids, you know? They're still connected because they still have some type of business venture together or whatever. So they see, they still are around to see that glow-up, you know? And sometimes they don't have any connection. They just are connected on social media. They're just watching it through social media. They're stalking their ex's social media, watching their ex grow and glow up, you know what I mean? They're watching their ex go through this process of healing and growth. They're watching their ex and they're just like, "Dang, you changed." You know? And they'll reach out to, they, they'll specifically reach out to them. They've hit, look, they've hidden you on social media a lot of times. They've hidden you. But then, like I said, they look so, they look single and they reach out like, "Yeah, I've been single for a long time." And they start cheating on you with their ex. And the ex might not know. The ex might know. I'm not saying, I'm not, I'm not always going to say that the narcissist ex is always innocent because sometimes their ex does know. You know, and the ex does know and sneaks around with them. They do, they do that sometimes. I'm not trying to make it seem like the ex is always an innocent, an innocent bystander in this toxic, toxic relationship dynamic, you know?
But like, yeah, sometimes they will go back to their exes, y'all. And another reason that they will go back, they will go back to their exes because sometimes it's easier to go back than it is to go forward. Now, it's a lot easier to go back to someone because I've already established roots with this person. Me and this person already know each other. That is to go out here and have to start a whole new love-bombing phase, have to spend money, have to get to know somebody. It's, it's sometimes it's easier to go back, you know? It really is. It's easy, especially if we're still attached in some way, shape, or form. It's a lot easier for us to just go back to each other and deal and handle things like this again.
Y'all, I'm not telling you if you deal with a narcissist or toxic person, then this is what I'm just saying. I know it's easier said than done, but I'm rooting for y'all. Like if they, if they are still dealing with their ex and being sneaky with their ex, y'all, if they still, if they's dealing with their ex being sneaky with their ex, then I'm telling you right now, as a, as a person who's trying to help you leave that person alone, I, I know y'all. Like I said, consider leaving them alone. Consider distancing yourself from that person because if they're still being flirty or sneaking around with the ex and like not letting you be in communication with the ex at all, especially if they have to be in communication with their ex for kids or whatever, and they're just exing you out of the picture, keeping you hidden, or not letting y'all involve in each other, they, there can be some sneaky behaviors going on, y', y'all. So make sure that you are, you know, just in tune with that. In tune and not letting them make you feel, not letting them make you look silly because sometimes they will absolutely go back to the ex that they claim to hate. You know, make sure you subscribe to the channel, y'all. I know you hear that little beep. I got to do a Zoom call right now. H, this is out. Peace. Thank you so much for making it to the end of my video. You are a mental health rockstar and I appreciate you for being here. If you haven't already, make sure to click on the screen to subscribe to the channel and watch another one of my videos in my playlist. There's also a link available up here for you to purchase my kids' book, "Remember, It's Not Your Fault" on Amazon. So check that out. Thank you. I will see you in the next video. Peace.