You Can Actually Control What You Feel

Here's the insane thing. You can actually control what you feel. And by control, I don't mean suppress. Literally think about the situation in a different way. Cultivate compassion for this person. What is it like to be this person? Let me really try to understand.

Think about someone who's like your bully. And often times bullies, the weird thing, right, is that bullies are oftenimes popular. You think to yourself like, why is someone this way when they have everything? When they have friends, they're captain of the football team. Like what must it be like to have so many of the things that I don't have? The things that would make me content, the things that would make me feel so much happier. And if I had all of those things, what would have to be going on inside me to be an ass to other people? Changes your perspective.

The first time that we think a different way, it's really hard. And then as we think a different way again and again and again and again, then it starts to become automatic. This is what we do in psychotherapy for generalized anxiety disorder. We alter the baseline emotional response that people have as they navigate through the world.