Transcription
Think about who you're trying to become right now. That version of you who can have everything that you desire. Maybe they're more confident. They're more decisive. They're more bold. And now I want you to think about how difficult it's been to actually stay connected to that version of you when life has thrown obstacles in your way.
This is the number one thing that I see people struggle with. They get a surge of motivation, of inspiration. They write their vision board. They decide to change, but then life just gets in the way. So, you might have had moments of self-doubt that were so strong, they just make you wonder whether you're even on the right path. You might have emotional triggers come up that are so intense that make you regret even setting the goal in the first place. And I want you to know and realize that all of this stuff that comes up after you set a goal and you start changing your identity and your energy is normal. It's part of the path. And anybody who's ever achieved anything significant has gone through these emotional lows, but they have not let those lows define them. And they certainly didn't let those lows stop them.
So, in this video, I'm going to be sharing with you why these emotional lows and these stumbling blocks even happen in the first place. And I'm going to walk you through three steps that you can take to move through these stumbling blocks and overcome them so that you can continue on the path towards your desires and you can continue embodying that future version of you that you wish to become.
Why you experience emotional downs? You've got to realize that this is an inevitable part of your journey. If you're going to be entering a new reality, you're going to have to become a new version of you that is energetically resonant with that reality. So, the version of you sitting here today, you've got basically all these different parts of you that are conscious and unconscious. And all of those parts are making up your energetic frequency. Some of those parts of you, especially the parts that are unconscious, are not energetically resonant with the reality that you're aiming for, with the goal that you set, with the version of you that you're becoming. Right?
So, for example, I've got a client who she came to me. She wanted to 10x her coaching business. She wanted, you know, her content to pop off. She wanted to be respected. She wanted to be an authority figure in her space. But she had this unconscious part of her that felt like she was unheard, that felt like her voice wasn't valued, that was afraid to even speak up. In working together, what happened was that part of her started to get triggered. It started to get brought out of the dark. It was unconscious and it was made conscious. Why? Because she could not enter the reality where she was an authority figure online making content whilst having an unconscious part of her that was afraid of speaking up and speaking her truth. Those two things did not energetically resonate with each other. And so this is what happens with every client I've ever had, any anyone inside my community, people who watch my content and on my own journey as well. People set the goal, they embark on the path, and the path never really looks like how you think it's going to look like, but it is very intelligently designed to specifically trigger the unconscious parts of you that don't resonate with what you just said you're aiming for.
So, even in my own life, I've gone through when I look back on when I first, you know, set the goal to have the reality that I have right now and become the version of me that I am right now. I was sent down a path of highs and lows. It was like a winding street basically and I was triggered again and again and again and I had to release different parts of me again and again and again. So first it was the fear of being seen. Then it was the fear of being judged. Then it was like this ego part of me that was doing content for validation that had to get triggered and released. Then it was the part of me that felt like what I was doing was not good enough. Then it was my perfectionism. All of these emotional blocks have come up along my path to becoming the woman that I am today and having the success that I have today. And if those parts of me never got triggered, I never would have even known they were there. And I never would have been able to release them.
So this is why when you're going down this path, it's like sometimes you have to go through this dark night of the soul. You have to let all these parts of the old self die so you can be reborn a new. And it's really heartbreaking when people think, you know, everything is falling apart for no reason. It's usually always falling apart right before you break through. And I want to give you this phrase that always keeps me in the right headspace with this. It's always darkest before the dawn. But as soon as you learn to see in the dark, that's when dawn will break. Okay?
So, I'm going to be teaching you in the next three steps how you can see in the dark so that dawn can start to break. How you can actually navigate when you're in the middle of an emotional trigger, when life has knocked you on your ass, how you can navigate that and move through it and come out the other end at the level that you have actually been wishing for and as the version of you that you've been trying to embody.
Step one is to accept the emotion. Do not resist when you get emotionally triggered. Do not resist the emotions that you're feeling. Do not resist anything about it. When you start resisting it, you will prolong it. So, I was, this was so clarified to me recently when I got triggered. My most recent emotional trigger. I had this thing around perfectionism coming up. And I hadn't had a trigger come up in a really long time. I was in flow state for months on end. I felt really good, really balanced and I was just living as this kind of version of me consistently for months on end. Then I set a new goal which was going to require me to become a new version of me and it triggered. I started moving in that direction and it triggered something inside me that was related to perfectionism. Now because I resisted the emotions I was feeling. So I was having a really loud inner critic. I was sabotaging all of my work like I put everything on pause. Um I had a lot of doubt, a lot of fear coming up because I was resisting that I was feeling these things. I was not able to gain the insight as to why it was happening. So this is what happens with most people. You feel doubt, you feel fear, you feel insecurity, and you go, "Nope, that can't be happening to me. That can't be happening to me." And this is what I was doing. Part of it was my ego because I thought, I've already worked on my triggers, so it can't be a trigger. So I can't be feeling bad. I can't be feeling fear. And I fought it and I fought it and guess what? It got worse and worse and it never resolved. But the moment that I stopped resisting it and I said, "Okay, I'm feeling these emotions," was the moment that I was able to start actually understanding why they were triggered in the first place and what was actually laying underneath it.
Okay. So, it is so important when you're getting emotionally triggered to realize first of all, this is just a part of you. This is not all of who you are. You're not just going to be this, you know, doubt-filled, insecure, fearful person for the rest of your life. This is a part of you getting triggered because you've just set a goal or intent or an intention to change yourself. And so, don't resist when it comes up. It has a message for you and you're not going to get the message if you just stand there refusing that this is even happening. It can help as well to separate yourself from spiraling into it to just notice where you feel the emotion in your body and just name it. Stop fighting it. Just notice it where it is in your body. It's going to be in one of your energy centers, usually your lower energy centers, and just name the emotion and really give it the proper name. So often times we say sad, but we might not be feeling sadness at all. We might be feeling disgust. We might be feeling anguish. We might be feeling grief. So get in the habit of noticing when you feel an emotion. Getting out of that fighting stance. Look at it like it's a teacher. Your emotion is a teacher and you're going to stand there like battling with this teacher who's here to give you something, give you some insight into yourself so you can actually move towards what you want and you're going to stand there fighting it. That makes no sense. So see it as a teacher. Notice where it is in your body and name it. Name it accurately. That is you accepting the emotion. And from there you can move on to step two.
Step two, you're going to release the part of you that is associated with that emotion. So for this step, you really need to go in with compassion and with no judgment and seek to really understand what this emotion is here for, where it came from, and the part of you that it's associated with. Okay? So it helps in this scenario to visualize yourself and your energy and your identity basically is made up of all these past versions of you and especially these dormant traits that end up limiting you and triggering strong negative emotions in the future. Those are typically created by traumatic events of the past that have not been resolved. And this is the stuff that keeps people in patterns and keeps them from progressing. Okay?
So if we take my example of when I was sabotaging and I felt really bad and I stopped kind of growing in my business. I when I accepted that this was happening, I took it a step further and I went into a meditative state and I sank into my body and I said, "Okay, where is this?" And it was coming from my solar plexus. There was a bit of it in my heart and I was like, "Okay, who is this part of me? Who is this version of me? And what are they really feeling?" So you can do this in meditation. You sit down, you tune into your body and you ask where is this emotion and what part of me is it attached to. So for me from that I got the answer that this was a child part of me who wanted to be seen as perfect so that I could be so that I could feel important basically so that I could feel validated. And so the real true emotional need was to feel validated and feel significant and to feel important. It wasn't actually anything to do with the surface level stuff that it looked like it was about. And this is usually the case for every kind of emotional stumbling block that you run into. You've got to look at what's actually driving that on a deeper level because it's always something that you might not expect.
So for me, I had to really go in and I could see like this seven-year-old version of me who just wanted to feel important and valued. And because I heard that part of me, because I really listened to what this actually was, I was able to understand it. Once I understood it, I could actually reassure it and validate it. So you do this, for example, by saying to this part of you, "What's wrong?" You let that part of you speak fully. You let it say what it needs. You let it express its unmet emotional needs from the past that are coming up now in this situation that you've been triggered in. And then you just validate it. You say, "I hear you. I'm here for you. I love you. I completely understand why you feel like this." So that immediately reduces the emotional sting of this trigger. Then you want to go in and you want to say anything that's going to reassure this part of you. And I'm going to give you a default phrase that works almost every time. You want to say the past is not the present. To this part of you that's emotionally triggered. The past is not the present. Right?
So for me in this situation where I wasn't feeling validated or valued or important, I could say to this part of me, look, this situation that you were in when you were seven, it's not reality anymore. You don't need to worry about this anymore. You don't need to overachieve anymore. You don't need to be seen as perfect to feel special or secure anymore. And I was able to reassure that part of me like, look, you're an adult now. All of these things are now true for you. You can see the bigger picture now. You basically just want to say anything to that part of you that's going to reassure them and let them know that it's okay to let this go. Whatever fear, whatever insecurity, whatever doubt, whatever emotional need they feel like was unmet, you want to meet that need now in what you're saying to them. Okay? So, if this part of you feels like they're not validated, you want to validate them. If they feel like they're not valued, you want to make them feel valued. If they feel like they're not heard, you want to give them evidence that they are heard. And this is going to allow that part of you to let this go.
So, this can be something that's difficult to get your head around if you're not connected to your body and you don't know how this works, but this is actually how your energy is made up in your body. And so, when you go in, this is called parts work or shadow work. When you actually go in in this energy and you're open and you're compassionate and you're reassuring, this is what really quickly starts to release these emotional blocks. Okay? And an important part of this is in that first step where you're identifying this part of you and you're letting them speak, you also allow yourself to feel everything that that part of you needs to feel. So maybe you were feeling like I was feeling a little bit of doubt or insecurity. But when I really dropped into that part of me, it was like intense fear and unsafety and all these other things and intense insecurity. And I let myself just feel it. It was loneliness. It was all these other emotions. I let myself just feel it because in that moment, I wasn't me. I was that part of me. So that's the process to start releasing these parts of you. You want to drop into that part of you that's feeling the emotion. Feel it fully. Let yourself feel it fully because that's how you release emotions. You digest them and then they integrate. Then you validate that part of you and then you reassure that part of you by meeting those emotional needs now that weren't met back then when this part of you was created.
You should be getting into the habit of doing this every time you feel yourself getting into a negative state or sabotaging or getting stuck in a pattern. You need to start being brutally honest with yourself about what part of you is driving this. Because I see so many people with so much potential stuck in these perpetual cycles of not getting anywhere because they don't have the courage or the patience to actually just go in and figure out what's actually driving this. So a lot of people are stuck in relationship patterns that they don't like because of the way that their mother spoke to them when they were five and they never went in and validated that child part of them, that five-year-old part of them who's still hurt and traumatized. And so now they have the same pattern in the relationships. Or I see somebody who's in the same financial situation every single month because they didn't go in and soothe again a younger part of them who was scared of money, who was scared of making money, who was scared of receiving money. So please don't let these patterns continue in your life now that you have this process to go through and actually understand what's ruling you. Most people are running through life being ruled by their five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten-year-old selves unconsciously. So I encourage you to really trust this process and go in with an open mind. And you would be shocked how much you're still carrying from the past. And you'd also be shocked how easy it is to release that because once you go in with the clarity that you have now and the higher perspective that you have now as someone who's probably an adult if you're watching this video, you're going to realize how many false beliefs and kind of false fears and doubts these younger versions of you are carrying. And as soon as you go in and actually identify, oh my god, I've been unconsciously afraid of this kind of silly thing that happened when I was five. Immediately you're going to realize that that fear is invalid and it's going to actually be released.
Okay. So, step one and two are really going to get you out of the emotional trench, that trigger where you just feel so overwhelmed and consumed by your emotions. Once that's released, how you can actually stay unstoppable when life is throwing things in your way is you respond as your future self. So, I talk about this a lot. After you set a goal and you decide to show up as a new version of you, you're going to have to show up as a new self in your old reality for some time. And you're going to have to be strong enough to do that. And that's when reality can start shifting and bending around your new energy. You want to start using everything in your old reality as an opportunity to respond differently and to show the world, show the universe that you're not the same person that you were before. So you simply go from reacting to responding. So these triggers and these stumbling blocks in your reality are opportunities for you to show that you're now your future self. And you will get tested.
So this client that I had who had this fear of not being heard, who kept herself very small and was afraid to speak up and speak her truth, she was working through this trigger and meeting those emotional needs of her past self and releasing this fear of not being heard or fear of being rejected and all the things that came with her not being able to speak her truth. So we wrote a plan on how she was going to show up as this version of her and lo and behold, something happened again. So this is the thing. You are going to get tested to see if you are actually now this version of you that you say you are. So something happened again where she had a boundary push. She had a situation where she felt like she wasn't heard. And instead of letting herself get sucked back into the trigger and react like she almost always did emotionally, she was able to say, "No, I want to respond now proactively as the creative being that I am as the future version of me." So she stayed at her boundary, she stayed calm, she didn't shrink her voice, and she stayed in her truth. And in that moment, she rewired her identity. And she also in that moment rewired her reality. So these moments where you feel like life is kind of throwing stuff at you for no reason, they're actually crucial pivotal moments where you can actually shift your frequency because the things that trigger you most are actually the things that are going to set you free when you approach them differently.
You cannot keep letting temporary emotions define your future. You're the creative being in this physical vessel having this experience. And you can't keep letting external circumstances and triggers slow you down when they're just part of the path. Anyone who has achieved anything significant in this life, who's had massive transformation has gone through this process and has known that this rebirth, these triggers, these emotional wounds, they need to come up and you need to be strong enough to move through them with clarity and awareness so you can come out the other end as the version of you who you want to be.
In this space, people kind of want to emotionally bypass and they want to just be love and light and feel good all the time. But you didn't come here to be love and light and feel good all the time. This is a really dense, polarized experience that we're having. We have this darkness. We have these traumas. We have these lower energy centers with these lower vibrational aspects of us. But if you want to experience the light, you have to be willing to face the dark. That's the only way you're going to raise up in your consciousness. That's the only way you're going to actually expand as a human being. And so long as you keep avoiding and you keep running from the darkness and from these heavier emotions, you're never actually going to be able to see your full potential and step into your your most kind of light, most empowered version of yourself.
I implore you, please don't resist your emotions when they come up because they're here to tell you something. Accept them. Have the courage to accept them and then have the courage to actually be honest with yourself about what's underneath them, the part of you that's getting triggered and go through the process of releasing that part of you. That's what's going to set you free from your patterns. Then you want to get back on track and recommit to showing up as this future version of you. Even on bad days, even in old triggers, in old circumstances, you want to have the strength of will to actually show up as the version of you who you want to be. Please don't let bad days or setbacks keep you from this vision, from this desire that's on your heart when they're actually part of the process and they're in your path because you are strong enough to overcome them. And always ask yourself, what would the future version of me do next?
If this video resonated with you and you feel like you're on the path, but you keep getting stuck over and over again, you can book a call in the link in the description. If you want a guided meditation to go through the process of releasing this part of you that's holding on to this emotion, you can also find the link below to my private community. I have tons of guided meditations and other resources in there to help you with this process as well. That's all for this week, guys. Thank you all for watching.