Transcription
Welcome to the Wheel With It podcast with your host Devon. Let's get into the episode.
Hello, hello! Welcome to another episode of Wheel With It. On today's show, we have Patrick Portman. He is a fascinating guy. He's a therapist that uses all kinds of cool therapy techniques that we'll talk about in the show, and he has a wife who is deaf and he is hearing, so he has a lot of really cool things to say about that.
I love this conversation with him. Sorry, this episode is a day late with Memorial Day and everything, and it was my favorite weekend of the year, which was the Indy 500. So I take time and watch that. So that is why this episode is coming out Tuesday. And speaking of, I might have a very cool surprise for you guys in regards to that coming soon. I don't know exactly when, but I am bouncing off the walls to hope I get to share that with you guys. With that in mind, here's my conversation with Patrick Portman.
Welcome to Wheel With It, Patrick. Thanks for having me. First of all, tell us about yourself, and then we will get started.
Sure. Again, my name is Patrick. I am married. I have five children and live in Cincinnati, Ohio. I'm currently the executive director of a company called Life Tools, and we provide training and resources designed to help people, um, overcome some of life's biggest obstacles.
So what are those obstacles that you help people with? I like to always say each person's journey is different. There's no life instruction book in life, and so our organization attempts to try to tackle some of those issues, whether it be relational issues, whether it be mental health issues, just different challenges in life when it comes to parenting, when it comes to different challenges that people face. And we create online and virtual resources designed to help them overcome whatever challenges are in their road.
Yeah, I was listening to a podcast that you were on to prepare for this, and those virtual modules are really cool. Can you tell us about what a virtual module is?
Sure. We use Canvas, um, as our platform to broadcast. It's a similar platform that a lot of colleges and universities use. Yep. And so although you don't get college credit for these courses, they're, um, really little small snippets that you can go through, maybe a five to fifteen minute module each day to help you assess and overcome certain aspects. So again, maybe you're trying to, uh, do a module on overcoming depression, or, uh, maybe you're struggling when it comes to relational intimacy when it comes to a relationship and would like to go through a course with that. Maybe you're battling an addiction and want to have steps on how to overcome an addiction. So each module, each course breaks it down to smaller modules, and again, you can go at the pace that you want. You can access them from really any computer, tablet, even your cell phone, or any other device that's connected to the internet. So it's able, no matter how busy your schedule is, you can do it on your lunch break at work, or even in the evening, or whenever you have free time to go through each of those courses.
So can you tell us a little bit about your addiction counseling?
Sure. So I adopted three of my five children, and all three of them were born into addiction. So I wanted to learn how do I parent children that were born into addiction? I went to Liberty University to study counseling, as well as to focus on addiction. I am an addiction specialist and focus, or have specialties in alcohol addiction, substance addiction, gambling addiction, sex addiction. I also attended Harvard and majored in neuropsychology to look at the neurological components to conditions, particularly, um, addiction. So that I'm able to help people that maybe traditional therapy is not working for. So our practice specializes in some different forms such as VR therapy, which uses an Oculus. We also specialize in light therapy, kinesthetic therapy, so different treatment modalities to help individuals that again, maybe used a different practice and it wasn't successful, so they want to try something different.
Can you tell us about the virtual reality therapy for a minute?
So virtual reality uses an Oculus. This is a Meta 2, which a lot of people maybe are familiar with in the gaming world to utilize maybe their their virtual reality games that they play on there. These have special software loaded on for the mental health world to help with different addics, addiction as we just mentioned, depression, PTSD, anxiety. So it allows me as a therapist to have a controlled environment and walk a a patient through a specific scenario to overcome that that particular condition. I'm able to control what is sent to the Oculus through a computer and be able to see real time what the client is experiencing, whether it be a medical issue of their blood pressure rising, to maybe fear kicking in, to maybe a specific trigger. And so the Oculus creates, like I said, a virtual reality environment for me to be able to see what's going on in real time.
So that is so cool! I had never heard of virtual reality therapy until I was listening to the podcast that you were on to prepare, and I was like, that is so cool. You mentioned that you had children that were born addicted, which I'm, I'm sorry that your kids have to go through that, but what are some of the challenges of children born into addiction?
I think one of the biggest things is the developmental piece. I think when a child is born, and often times they look 100% normal. When a mother who is battling addiction gives birth, they look at the the child and I think they're expecting to see a physical normality, and when they're not, they're like, oh, okay, perfect. My child is normal and there was no damage to what I did. But often times the addiction often hits the child in the neurological compartment, in particular in the form of development. So you see this later in life. Most frequently, you see it in the form of learning. So maybe a stronger case of ADHD, maybe there's some form of learning impairment. Some children, we see autistic qualities with that. So each child is impacted differently, but they all exhibit symptoms typically in the learning and auditory or visual departments. And that's one of the reasons why I went to study the neurological component because the brain is repairable. If there are deficiencies, you can work with any child with ADHD or PTSD or any of those conditions and be able to help them get caught up. All of my children have made significant progress in those areas, and some of the conditions that they suffered with earlier in life, they've since passed. So my oldest child, for instance, has struggled with reading early on, and now he reads a chapter book a day. He's one of my speed readers. So it just shows you with therapy, any of those conditions have solutions, and children can outgrow those conditions.
I answered it before, but how can our brain be fixed?
Okay, your brain is constantly repairing itself. So we used to have the, um, mindset that your brain developed from, um, conception all the way to age 26. Um, with modern technology, we have found that the brain continues to, um, develop and grow and repair itself even past age 26. The only, uh, challenge that we have is after 26, the process to which the brain repairs or grows slows down. And so with certain technologies such as light therapy or VR therapy, you can tell the brain, of the brain you want to work on, can send the energy to that particular part of the brain and thus repair it or, uh, modify what we call bad synapses between what the brain, think of it, recorded before. So you can fix those connections. So those kinks or quirks or bad data can be fixed over time.
So what other addiction treatments are there besides medication?
Okay, medication assistance is one of the most prevalent forms of treatment out there. Medication, different types of medication being used such as Vivitrol or Suboxone, of the top two that are used. Those help an individual to not go into relapse or relapse symptoms. The challenge with medication assistance is sometimes people will get on medication and they think, oh, look, I'm cured. I'm not having any cravings anymore. I'm not going through withdrawal symptoms. Um, but the reality is they're still on those medications. Um, and the challenge with any drug is over time, you can, that drug can lose its effectiveness. For instance, if you took Tylenol every day, over time, Tylenol is going to lose its effectiveness and it's not going to be able to treat pain. And it's the same with any other drug. So in addition to what we call medication assistance, therapy, those are usually combined with individual counseling for an individual to work with a therapist to look at what's the underlying issues underneath the soil of addiction, what are the needs that are being, um, fused into addiction, what are, is there wounds, um, what are their developmental pieces, what is the damage caused? So there's, um, multiple underlying issues, um, that can be addressed with a professional therapist in a form of individual counseling. There's also group counseling. Um, studies have shown that group therapy can be effective for addiction. First of all, to be in a room with other people that understand what you're going through. Sometimes family members of those battling addiction don't understand it. They're just like, you just stop thinking that way, or you stop taking those drugs. Most family members that don't understand it think it's 100% behavioral, which it's not. There's a chemical dependency, and there's where the neurological component can come in. So group therapy can be very helpful to work as a group to hold each other accountable and to tackle some of the issues in a community environment that can help an individual to progress. In addition to that, we mentioned earlier about VR therapy. VR therapy again helps to look at different components that you can't in a traditional counseling session or in a group session. On top of that, there's light therapy. There's kinesthetic therapy, which is touch, which in a lot of cases can be effective. There's hundreds of different forms of of therapy out there, and the goal is to find a tool, if you will, or form of therapy that that fits that person's needs because with addiction, one size does not fit all. So sometimes you just need to change it up and see what works for that client, um, and then move forward with that.
Uh, one of the things that really drew me to you and made me want you to have made me want to have you as a guest is your wife is, is that that's true?
So I am passionate about helping people understand the deaf community. Many in the deaf community will not go and see a therapist because they don't speak their language, and many in the deaf community will not go seek treatment. So I'm passionate about helping others understand the deaf community, understand the needs of the deaf community. I'm fluent in American Sign Language. Those clients that are deaf can sign up for consultation and have a therapist who can speak their language and feel safe that their needs are being addressed.
That's really cool. So if somebody doesn't know sign language, how can they interact with somebody who's deaf?
Very good question. There's lots of technology out there to assist with that. So there's free apps out there that will translate. I see all the time people using Google Translate to translate English into Spanish or, so there is apps out there. There's a phone system called Purple. Most deaf people have an additional phone number that you can call them on, and an interpreter will answer the phone and translate for them. There's again, apps out there that you can download on your phone to translate. You can text someone, you can write things out. I, I think one of the biggest turn-offs that, um, people in the deaf community experience is just people ignoring them. I think people get freaked out that, oh, this person's deaf, I don't know how to communicate with them, so I'm just going to ignore them. And they just want to be treated normal, like any human being. And so it's really no different than someone speaking Spanish or a different language. You just find ways of communicating with them. "Hola, ¿cómo estás?" And it's the same with sign language. You can learn sign language, you can write, you can, some deaf individuals can read lips. Talking louder does not change anything. So I see, yes, please, mouthing or talking loud. Deaf means deaf. It doesn't matter how loud you speak, they're still not going to hear you. Between being deaf and being hard of hearing, and so I find that amusing that they think that if they shout louder, the person's going to hear them. And clearly, there's some ignorance in our society of what deaf means, particularly in the airline industry when we don't provide, uh, interpreters, but we'll show up at the gate with a wheelchair, and it's, there's nothing wrong with their legs. Their legs work perfectly fine. It's just their ears that are not working. But lots of different ways of communicating with a deaf person. But people assume that that the deaf population is small, but it's not. We have 32 million Americans that are either hard of hearing or deaf. And the reality is, people are not all born deaf. My wife was not born deaf. She was born hearing, but people do lose their hearing over time. And so that's why it's important for people to learn American Sign Language because you may not know that maybe later in life, you might learn, lose your hearing or know someone that does. And if you already know ASL, then you have another language to use and to communicate with the world.
What are some apps out there that can translate English into ASL?
There's tons out there out there, both on the Apple platform and the Android platform. Some different programs also have a built-in feature to allow you to just click to add closed caption. So if you're, um, a broadcaster and using Zoom or using YouTube, there's an automatic feature in there to to add closed caption, and that's very helpful for the deaf community. And some of those apps also have another button that you can click to add cell or interpretation on there. It's not perfect, but it does add that. I hire an interpreter for all of the media that we do. So we offer all of our training courses in English as well as ASL, so that someone who is deaf can take the courses in ASL, and that just uses an interpreter. So in the corner, they just see the interpreter signing the entire broadcast. I think there's confusion of what ASL is. We think ASL is just a language, but it's not. Imagine watching a movie with the sound completely off. How much of that movie would you miss? When you miss the sound of, we ask someone, "How are you doing today?" and they say, "Great." Is "great" good? Is "great" bad? There's a lot that we miss. Is someone telling a joke? Is someone being serious? So text alone is not sufficient in order for us to understand communication. So ASL not only combines the language, but it communicates feeling. It communicates whether someone's telling a joke or not, whether someone's serious. There's so much that's built in there that we miss by just having closed captions instead of hiring an interpreter. Out there, when it comes to like medical and mental health, a lot of insurances will bill for interpreters. So there's really no excuse why businesses, particularly in the medical, mental health world, can't hire an interpreter for the deaf community because there's no out-of-pocket cost for them. They can just bill that to insurances. In addition to that, again, there's apps that you can download on tablets and other things. So that if you're a business owner, if someone walks into your business, you can click on the app and it'll provide an interpreter for you.
So what are some of your favorite apps?
Again, I'd rather not list particular apps out there because I don't want to plug one or the other. I'll just, just for copyright purposes and such, I would just say there's tons out there that you can look for. But if someone is struggling and would like to know a particular app, they can email me at Patrick@lifetools.org, and I'll help them find an app that's conducive to their business world or to their lifestyle and go from there.
Off the air, yeah, I understand that. I just wondered if there was one you recommended, but I will look up ASL apps. What are some of the challenges of you being hearing in your life with your wife being deaf?
That's a good question. I think some of the challenges is in the form of communication, particularly when you want to express your emotion or feeling. Typically, when we're upset, we'll talk faster, right? And we may use vocabulary that we don't use in a given setting. And so sometimes when a hearing person is communicating with someone in the deaf world, there's words or things that are out of context that both parties don't understand. So for instance, if you and I went to a restaurant and we're sitting at a booth, in the hearing world, it's taboo to listen to other conversations, right? We just tune out those conversations. In the deaf world, they like to know everything that's going on in the world, and there's nothing that's off limits to them as far as listening to conversation. If someone wants a private conversation, they're going to pull into a different room. So there's different cultural things that were different. I didn't start off knowing ASL when I first met my wife. I knew very little, and so I had to hire a tutor to help me pick up over time. I'm still learning new words every day. And so again, the amount of language that you understand impacts the relationship that you're going to have. And any relationship, it's an investment to invest into that person to communicate with them. And if you don't know that language, it creates a a barrier for that person to open up and share with you and for you to share with them.
That's really insightful. So deaf people will just basically pick up on every conversation? They'll just scan?
Again, I say their ears don't work, but their other senses are very in tune. So my wife can see a fly on a wall, like she's very in tune. On top of that, they're in tune to emotions. So they're in tune to that person maybe is a shady person or that person is sad. So they tune into people's emotions. So they have a greater ability to understand what's going on in a room without even hearing a conversation. They study body language, they study facial expressions, they study movement to understand what's going on and can pick up, um, more than you and I as a hearing person could ever pick up just by what they're not experiencing. I always say my wife is lucky because she doesn't get to hear snoring, she doesn't get to hear the kids fighting, she doesn't get to hear nails on a chalkboard or going to my kids' game when they have the buzzer going off with annoying sounds. So all those annoying sounds that you and I experience, they don't get to experience. So I think in some ways she gets a sleep at night because she's not distracted by the overall noises. She can just tune it all out, close her eyes, and go to bed.
Yeah, I wish I could do that. Is there anything else that you want to add before I get off here?
I just encourage all of your listeners to look at their life and what's holding them back from achieving the life they want. If you're not happy with your life, what's getting in the way of that happiness? And there are tools, there are resources, there are professionals out there that can help you overcome that. And the definition of insanity is doing the same things over and over again and expecting a different result. So do something different this year. My dad says that all the time. Give yourself a goal, give yourself something to move forward. But if you're not moving forward, then you're going to move backwards. And just encourage you to challenge yourself this year to do something different, to learn something, to grow, and to be a better version of yourself.
Okay, thank you for coming on. You've, you've been so, so great. Where can people follow you on social media and websites and all that?
Okay, my nickname on all social medias is Papa Patrick. You can follow me on TikTok and Instagram and all of the social medias under Papa Patrick. If people have questions, you can email me at Patrick@lifetools.org. And again, all the resources that we talked about today are on the lifetools website, which is lifetools.org. There's lots of great resources to help you on your own personal journey.
We will have all those links in the show notes. And again, thank you so much for coming on. Wasn't that just fascinating? I thought that was so cool, especially with the virtual reality therapy and some of the tips he gave about how to interact with deaf people. I, I like that. So please be sure to follow him and me on social media. All those links will be in the show notes, and we will see you guys next episode. Bye guys.
Thank you for joining us. We hope you enjoyed the show. Remember to follow the show and our guests on social media and subscribe. Be sure to hit the bell so you'll get notified when we upload new episodes. See you next time.