Transcription
I used to try so hard to work on my weaknesses, but now I'm old enough to hire them. I don't want to sit in first class on my own. It's boring.
If you want to build wealth, you have to grow your income. A 9 to 5 is not going to do it for 98% of people.
We've been doing gentle parenting on people who aren't our kids and it's not working. They don't teach you to have a plan for your life. And because they don't teach you how to have a plan for your life, someone else will make a plan for you. You lie down and you get up and you're pregnant. Love a day. I've had enough.
Never let success get to your head and failure get to your heart. Don't go into the marriage with debt. The average cost of a wedding in the UK I made in a month. There are certain levels of wealth you can't get to if you don't unlock your mind. And I speak to so many people and I'm like, I can't do this. You need to speak to a therapist.
I hope you guys are excited to get into this episode. Don't forget, if you would like to purchase an investment property in Dubai, make sure to fill out the form below and book a free consultation with me.
Welcome to the building wealth with no borders podcast with me Lamade Elizabeth for I'll be bringing you guests from around the world to share their strategies on building wealth and today we are filming at myriad studios in London so if you're looking for a professional studio and a reliable studio then definitely check them out and we are here with money columnist financial educator author of your money life and how to save it and a qualified financial advisor Bosol welcome >> hi thanks for having me love the intro >> I am excited to have you here and I think one of the reasons that um I think it will be good is because this podcast is focused on on building wealth but we've we started off quite high level in in all honesty um and I think a lot of that is because it is based around my interests um and who I want to talk to and and and so a lot of it is quite high level but when we get in the dilemas and stuff I realize that there is a big chunk of financial education that we don't cover on the podcast we've never covered like anything like credit scores debt uh h and stuff like that. If we do talk about debt, we're talking about about it on a business level. >> Um so we've never covered it the basics. So and I know that you're really good at like covering the the foundations I think of of you know investing, personal finance and stuff. So I'm really excited to jump into the conversation but before we do that I will also let you introduce yourself. >> Oh well hi I'm Bisol and I am a financial educator. I'm an entrepreneur. I love business. worked in the corporate world for 10 years, studied math and finance. Um, I just want everyone to be financially educated so that they can make better decisions. But I also want people to go to therapy because there are certain levels of wealth you can't get to if you don't unlock your mind. >> And I speak to so many people and I'm like, I can't do this. You need to speak to a therapist. >> Oh, >> and the whole point of that is that I'm scared to invest. I'm scared to invest. I can't motivate you into that. Do you know what I mean? I can then you do it and then if something happens, you know, no financial advice and all that jazz. If something does happen, >> then you're upset at me and then maybe you never do it again. You need to unlock what is your fear behind it. Sometimes it goes into your past. Um, you know, the psychological reasons and so on. So that's something people really need to explore. >> Oh wow, that was deep. I wasn't expecting. Um, okay. Okay. So based on that then can we get a bit more into like your upbringing with regards to like money as well, money, education, that sort of stuff? >> Yeah. So I touch on this um quite a bit in your money life actually. I touch on being the youngest of six siblings and seeing them all have different money personalities. Two of my sisters were they loved experiences, they loved travel, but they were really good savers. At one point, I have to say cuz I don't want my sister to get upset if she sees this. One of my sisters, she was she was a status girl, honey. She used to like designer drip. That was her thing. However, she's now massive saver and investor. Um, so it's different, but I saw her growing up with that. My other brother, he loved ax trainers, do you know what I mean? All of that good stuff. Nice cars. And then another one of my brothers was an accountant and he was quite he was an investor, but he was a little bit risky and stuff. So, I was able to pick up different personalities. But what it also meant is that there was just lots of books around the house um about like money and different things. So I read obviously Rich Dad Poor Dad. That was one of the first books I read. I was like 17. And then I read you know The Richest Man in Babylon. So I did a lot of things growing up um along with my parents to just figure out my mindset. My mom studied um accounting but she started having kids quite young so she didn't get into it for too long and my dad was a lawyer. So, I always have to factor that in because I I wasn't always aware of my privilege and what that means having parents who do certain things cuz that also determines somewhat apparently sometimes what you become. >> So, yeah, that was a little bit about me and I always love math. By the way, my mom wanted me to be a pharmacist. >> Okay. >> Um her vibe was each child does something different. >> Okay, >> I know, right? And my oldest brother was an accountant, so she was like, "Nope, we've got one of those." And I was like, I do not like science and science does not like me. >> I'm good at math. I'm going to stick with my strengths. Even in life, entrepreneurs will tell you, stick with your strengths. >> That I used to try so hard to work on my weaknesses, but now I'm old enough to hire them. Oh, Bella, you're really coming in with the white minus. I love it. Um, oh, there was something about what you said. Okay. So, being the youngest, I find that my youngest brother, because he has so many older siblings that are doing relatively okay, he's very lazy with money. So, does that not your case? I feel like he just is too dependent on his older siblings. >> I think maybe I got tired of mine. I think I got tired of feeling like somebody was coming to save me and eventually I had to save myself. Because as my siblings were growing up, getting married, exploring the world, having kids, they have dreams and ambitions of their own. >> In my life, I don't want to be a liability to anybody. >> I'm always willing to do my share of the work and anyone I work with or I'm around, I hope the same for them >> because baby, this is capitalism. We've all really got to pull it up. Do you know what I mean? >> I love that. So, yeah, I just eventually as I saw them get older and have their own lives and have kids, I was like, "What am I really going to ask you for money?" >> I just I just thought that was selfish. >> So with their different money personalities, did you choose which one of those you wanted? Like how did that affect what you wanted your money personality to be? >> Oh, I was a mix. Um, so what I learned from them, especially as a woman, I wasn't giving my 20s to a man. I was never giving my 20s to a man. That's personal. I was never because I know the sacrifice that comes if you're an ambitious woman that wants a family. And I said 20s you can't have that but 30s onwards you can cuz by then I know myself you've met me and you either accept me as I am or you hit the door. >> Fa this is too juicy. What is what does giving your 20s to a man mean? What does that mean? It means for me in my opinion, it means wrapping your whole identity around them before you know who you truly are. >> And you know what's the word? They say your frontal lobe is still developing. >> Yeah. >> So, how sure can you be about yourself? And sometimes you have to ask yourself, >> am I here for security? Am I here because I'm scared? And sometimes that is the case. You date people because maybe you want to be protected or you like relationships. I'm a relationship girl. I've been in relationships before. But the notion of settling down just to settle down, I still fel still felt like I had so much life to live and so much to see >> and I didn't want anyone to tell me >> where are you going? What do you mean where am I going? >> So was that from your mom that you took away that of like your siblings or what made you say that? >> My sister had her first child at 24. >> Okay. >> And that taught me a lot. That taught me a lot about responsibility of having a child. And I remember at the time I was in college and I used to say, my friends used to say, "Oh, I'm going to have a baby at 23, 24." And I was thinking, I have a sibling who's 24. And I used to be like, "I'm going to have kids in my 30s." And everyone was like, "You're going to be old." I was like, "I'm going to be ready. Financially ready, emotionally ready, mentally ready. I know what I'm signing up for." Kids don't come with a receipt. You cannot take them back. And I think it's irresponsible for people to bring children into this world and not know what they're doing. And I'm not talking about, you know, what temperature is the milk. I'm talking I'm talking about like how are you setting them up for the best future possible based on the current world we're in? Or is it just the thing of oh, this just happened to me so going to shrug my shoulders. I just don't think that's fair. There's just there's so many layers to this conversation because I remember there's this lady on Tik Tok, Madina, something like that. And one of the I'm not really into the content cuz that's not really my field, but something that did pop up on my feed was um on like the planning of children and how she was saying that the difference she sees between the black community and other communities is that a lot of the times we just end up getting pregnant, but in certain other communities they actually have a plan like I need this, this, this, and this. and then I'm going to have kids. And I thought that was really, really interesting. >> Yeah. Um I've said to people before that I have a plan and people said life doesn't work that way. And I said, "Watch me." >> That's what they always >> And here I am about to be married before I've had my first child, homeowner, angel investor, investor of all sorts, please. International speaker, please. Sometimes as a woman you have to chat your ish a little because people will try and tell you >> please >> plan and if it doesn't work at least give it back to God and flip it again and go again. >> Okay. So I love >> like for women don't just let life happen to you and just be like oh it's just are what are you like you know what I mean? >> Come on. >> Come on. Like I wish I knew how to say this, but sit up. Sit up for yourself and your life. My mom. Ooh, can I tell you a story? >> Yes. >> Oh my days. Anyway, let's see who this affirms. My mom, I remember when I was like 10, >> I wanted to go to a particular school. I won't say what the school is, >> okay? >> And I used to live in Brixton, but my school was in Westminster and so was my church. >> Okay? So, just give you an idea >> of my life, the two levels, how I used to live, >> right? >> And I was like, "No, I want to go to local school. I want to go to a local secondary school. I want to go with my local friends." But all of my sisters had gone to that secondary school. My mom was like, "Nope, you're going to that secondary school." And I said, "Why?" And when I was 10, she said to me, "You know, when you go to those schools, they don't always care about you. And they don't teach you to have a plan for your life. And because they don't teach you how to have a plan for your life, someone else will make a plan for you. And sometimes you lie down and you get up and you're pregnant. Go and make a plan for your life. That school will give you a plan for your life. >> Oh, 10. >> I was 10. And I was like, okay, what are you talking about? But I swear to you to this day, I still remember that because I was like, I get it. >> And it and it doesn't mean that it happens with everyone. It's not necessarily about teenage pregnancy or whatever. It's actually about >> does that does that school or system care about you? >> Yeah. >> Are you going to the best place where they are going to care about you and nurture you? >> That's that's real. That's actually so real because I went I probably went to the school that you wanted to go to. Your mom your mom did good, girl. She did good. She did good. So, okay. So, going looking at growing up. So, what educationally like what did that look like and what did you want to be as well? So, you said accountant, right? >> Yeah. I wanted to be an accountant. And I went to college and did an accounting course and I said, "This is boring." >> Sorry to the accountants. I'm really sorry. >> They know though. They know. Surely you guys know. >> Oh, thank God. And do you know what? Bring on the tech that's going to help with that cuz goodness gracious me. I was like, I'm going to be balancing books. I don't think so, darling. Let's make this a little more saucy. And I was just like, fine. I love maths. And my thing about learning about finance is no one was ever going to take my money away from me. That was my promise to myself. There is no and that's personal relationships. That's professional relationships. No one is going to come from underneath in any single way and take money. I've heard too many stories about women growing up where it's like he left me with nothing. What I said, uhoh, I don't like those stories and that can't be my story. So, I need to get witty quick. >> So, um yeah, studied math and finance and did that because it just gave me a lot of freedom to do what I wanted outside. And my first job was in a care home as an accountant assistant. And they basically lightly fired me. Oh, they didn't really fire me. They said basically, you've got got too much potential. You're too young to work here. >> So, they forced me into the city. >> Okay, Okay. I love that. But then I saw from your story you were also kind of into fashion and modeling. Where did that come into it? >> Yeah. I mean, I'm 510 and I was 510 and skinny. I said, "That's it, darling." I said, "That's it. I'm going to be a model." But it was it was tough and it was a different time before the internet. Um, so I used to go and many places would said say no. But sometimes I did really cool things like I would be like um tester model for um Franco Nas Nars. >> Yeah. So um that's one of the fun things I did. I did a lot of fun things. One time Harrods featured me on their page at the inception of Instagram um walking down the runway and I was really into it cuz I just thought and it really helped my confidence. So that's one of the things I tell people is all the things you do can add up to help you. I learned how to take pictures in front of people and not be worried about who was looking at me >> um or videos for example. So that really helped with my confidence >> and I think I just grew out of love with it. The idea of having to be a particular size and obviously all the politics so hard for black models. I know Liam Anderson and I um reached out to her when she was quite young getting into it and she's you know worked so hard. I think she deserves so much more credit than she gets. Um >> so yeah, I was into that. Oh and I wanted to be a model and then my parents were like yeah that's great but finish your education and they were like see what you want to do after. So what I used to do is my first website was the so lifestyle the soul lifestyle. Okay. >> And it was about fashion, finance and feminism. >> So was you doing this alongside working in finance? >> Yeah. >> Okay. And I was doing it before they could fire you for being online. >> Yeah. Because it was the inception of social media. >> So I used to have a middle name. I'd use the middle name at work and then people would be like, "Are you bowl of soul?" And I'd be like, "No." >> I'd straight up lie. And they were like, "Why are you lying?" But it was like I don't cuz then women sound some women would come to me and they start telling me about their plans and their dreams. But I always say again, be an independent thinker. You can't copy and do exactly what I'm doing. M >> one of my friends one time was like, "Yeah, I want to quit my job." Like you >> apples and oranges. >> That's all I'll say. Apples and oranges. I'm in finance. >> What I do isn't just based on my gender or my race. It's based on a constant need in the econom in in the economy. >> So, and she's a motivational speaker, a fantastic one, but I don't know that market. So, I can't tell you when you're going to be booked, what your cash flow is going to look like, and so on. >> That's so interesting. Um, what I wanted to talk about was forging your own path because I feel like you are one of the OG, if I can say, black personal finance creators from the UK. Can I say that? >> Yeah. >> I mean, I don't know who I don't know who else I would think of. >> Yeah. >> So, >> I don't know when you were going into that, were there other inspirations that you saw? >> So, there was this thing called UK Money Bloggers, and there was like 30 of us across the UK. >> Okay. across the UK. So that's how much it's changed. Okay. Um and I joined and some people were really kind to me and some people weren't. They wouldn't tell me how they were making money. They were making affiliate money and stuff like that and they would just ignore my messages. But first some um shout out to Andy and Lynn. They were just so kind and and helped me understand that world. But then I started, you know, putting out modeling pictures cuz at the time in 2015, fashion and beauty were the only things that were in online. M. >> So all the fashion and beautyies especially, they were making money. They were YouTubers and stuff. And I was like, "Okay, I'm going to come in and do finance." And that was tough because it wasn't popular. >> But people would love a picture of me and be like, "Stunning." >> And then I'd be like, "Yeah, there's a finance message underneath it." Because I was I was I was like, "Please, you have to care. Like all of these people watching your stuff, they're using money to buy these things. They need to know how it works." >> And I'm not going to lie, between 2015 to 2020, I didn't make a lot of money. M >> I made like maybe two grand >> in the 5 years >> because it wasn't it wasn't popular and the economy was okay. >> Influencers were becoming big and wearing designer was fine and cool and that you know that's that was the rise of people becoming richer and richer and showing how they live a very rich lifestyle. 2020 hits pandemic bang >> everyone's now like >> we need money. >> Ding ding ding ding ding ding ding. My phone didn't stop ringing. I said >> but what made you keep going in those five years? I guess you obviously had your actual job, but why did you keep pressing with the finance personal finance message if not that you're doing it for money, but what was the motivation to keep going? >> Honestly, I don't want to sit in first class on my own. >> I love that. It's boring. >> It's boring. I'm currently doing things on my own and now there are people who want to come. Not even I'm not necessarily talking about friends or family or people I know. And I'm like, especially as a black woman, oh my gosh, share the seats. Share the space. If my kid goes to private school, are they the only one there who's black? I don't want that for them. So, what am I doing to ensure that? So, a lot of it is um a bit of a selfish ambition, but also like let's help each other. >> I love that. That's that's really that's really heartwarming. I love that. Um, okay. So, this is that was a really funny and interesting intro to to Bolos. So, I'm sure we can dig more into it, but I know people are itching to get the nuggets and and and the wisdom, right? So, I want to kind of get back to the fundamentals of personal finance. Like I was saying, we haven't done much if any of that on this channel. Um, so if you were going to say, okay, someone is watching this and they're like, I and I get this all the time. Actually, the other day I was asking for people to send in their wealth and a lot of it is like I don't know where to start. Like I want to start building wealth. I have nothing saved. What are like the fundamentals of getting your money life together? >> First of all, you have to work on your mindset because if you tell yourself that you need to make a certain amount of money a particular way, you're limiting yourself. >> We're in a new day. We're in the digital world. So if you say I can only make money from my 9 to5, that's going to be true. If you say, "I can only make four figures a month," that's going to be true. So, it's also about your mindset. And also, get a better network. Start talking to people who aren't in similar situations to you. Not saying get rid of your friends. I'm saying start talking to people. Have conversations. Oh, that person's earning this, that person's earning that. One of the best things I love to do with my close ones is trade information just to let them know what's available. So, you have to work on your mindset. And people want to talk about building wealth and they don't know where to start. I've written a book called Your Money Life. I've actually written two. And I say to people, pick it up. Get the Audible. It's there. And this is why I say to people, go to therapy because you want me to hold your hand and be like, >> "Yeah, but this happened and when I was younger, and then this happened and that." And I'm like, I cannot do that. >> The world will eat you up. >> Listen, I worked in corporate finance. If you do not have thick skin, you are not surviving. >> And that taught me that no one is coming to save us. No one's coming to save me. No one's coming to save you. So, you need to make it work for yourself. And a lot of people need to do that. I've done the therapy for years. I had a financial adviser. I still do. I have an investing coach. Um, I have advisors like no tomorrow. When I want to execute something new, I'm speaking to my adviserss. And that doesn't happen often, but I do. Whoever it is, and I know people are now going to wonder who is that, who is that? >> You have to build your own network because my network might not be right for you, what you're building, but that's one of the things I learned. And what's the easiest way to say this? If you want to build wealth, you have to grow your income. A 9 to5 is not going to do it for 98% of people. I am so tired of the rhetoric online about a 9 to5 can make you rich. >> The people who can get rich from that working mergers and acquisitions, private equity, and so on. Please, tech, and even now AI's coming. Come on, my people. >> It's not Oh, come on. Yeah, it can make you rich. Okay. Are you filling your stocks and shares Iser up to 20K every year and that's the ISER allowance >> and ensuring that you have more. How are you doing this? Oh, property the property game is changing. >> So, how are you building this? This is why I say a lot of it as well is about your mindset. What are you is there anything you're afraid of? Because I talk to some people and I hear a lot of fear >> and I'm like right. And unfortunately, although there's more women coming out now, which I love, I wish there were more confident women available. I feel like there's still a small pool in comparison to men. I talk to men who don't know what they're doing, but they're still doing it anyway. When if I tell you the amount of guys that I speak to that do nonsense with their money, they're so easy to let they're 20k into crypto, 20k into this business that don't work, 50k into this. I'm like, you guys are they're so a readily able to just let go of their money into stuff. And what happens is that four of the things might fail, but the one thing that takes off, >> it will outdo the fact that you just and then women will just sit there with nothing. And a lot of women actually save quite a bit and do nothing with it. They just keep it in the bank account feeling cushy. Or they make plans forever. I was talking to my friend. She's had a business idea for like three or four years and was like, I need X, I need Y. I need connections in Kenya. Did she say Uganda? Maybe she did. and I need this amount of money. I said, that's three emails. >> What are we doing as women sitting on our ideas, sitting on our money? We have to keep moving forward. >> Otherwise, we're just going to constantly complain about the gender pay gap, the investment gender. No, the gender investment gap, the gender pension gap, all of all of the gaps. Child, all of the gaps. And we don't close that if we don't have audacity. Mhm. >> I can't say that enough. I'm very audacious and I'm glad I am because it's made me curious and it's made me go into rooms. I asked someone the other day to be my mentor. They kind of said no, but then they said yes. He sold his business for a quarter of a billion. >> I can call him when I like. >> I don't. I'm busy. He's busy. I like to call with a purpose. >> But the point is get audacious and start asking questions and not just to the people you know and like. People will come and see me and I'm so appreciative and I love my community and then they want to make me the person their go-to. You need to have multiple go-tos. If I want to start a podcast, >> I'm going to reach out to you. >> If I want to build wealth without borders, I'm going to go to you. If I want to build a property portfolio, I'm going to go to Bricks with Tips and >> and so on and so on. If I want a financial advisor, I'm going to Manuko. I could go on and on. You need to know who to go to for what. Cuz some people as well, I don't believe people who haven't done it. I can hear you. I can take a bit of motivation, but when people are like, "Here's what you need to do next." I'm like, "And what? And what have you done?" >> Well, let's get serious. >> So, I love that. So, mindset, building your team of like go-to people. What other things? >> Um, yeah. So, like I said, advisers. Make sure you have your advisers and build your income. >> Build your income. Yeah. >> You want to build your wealth, build your income. I speak to some people, spoke to someone the other day. They're an engineer. I said, "Do you do consulting? Find out how much people charge for consulting. Again, limited beliefs, limited mindset. I'll tell some people sometimes they'll come to me and they'll say, "This is the scenario. How much should I charge?" I'll say, "Six grand." >> Oh, no, no, no. Why? Cuz that's how much you make in three months usually. Take the money. At least try and negotiate down. So now they know what level to to go at with >> approach you at. Yeah. >> Otherwise, just be stuck. >> You have to get audacious and you have to start asking what's the worst that can happen. >> Love this. Don't be afraid to like keep your integrity, but you know, shuffle, negotiate, see what's out there. >> I'm always asking, what's the budget? >> Yeah. >> How does saving and like budgeting as an individual, where does that come into it? >> Okay, thank you for asking because it's always good to go back back to basics. Budgeting is knowing where your money is every single month. I know people get paid weekly and so on and some people get paid more than once a month. That's fine, >> but you need to look at what are your expenses, what's changed and so on. I tell people no two budgets are the same because people think, "Oh, yeah, but that's what I paid last month." Okay, but bills have gone up. Has has that reflected? Are you now in overdraft because you didn't notice that? >> It is important to budget. I always say, do not go to someone else's house if yours is not in order. Please. >> Sometimes I'll say to people, "No, I'm not coming." And I'm at home fixing my life. I don't know what that looks like. That could be stretching. That could be doing my budget. That could be looking at my investment portfolio. But I make it a habit. I am not going to somebody else's house or event if mine is not in order. And so many times we abandon our own house, our own portfolio, our own lives to go to something else. >> It may not be your friends, it could be an event and so on. and then now you're in the middle of the an event like those memes being like what am I doing with my life it was at home budget every single month and don't wait for the first of the month because the month has started please do it before and also pay yourself first I think a lot of people apart from obviously the bills and as we get older because when you're young and maybe in your early 20s and you're blessed enough to maybe be at home with your parents or guardians you have a lot of extra income and it's very easy to be like I'm going to get this I'm going to go to this retail Can I go to that retailer? Have you paid yourself first? Have you saved? Have you invested? At the very least, do you have your emergency fund? >> What are you doing for yourself? So, it's important to budget. It's a boring exercise. People need to learn to do the tedious work. >> Do that. Figure out where you are with your finances and go to the next level. And of course, saving is a good habit to build. I learned to save when I was very young and it it just it just helped me because when I was in when I was in uni, I didn't know anyone actually used their overdraft. >> I came out of uni and I was like, why is everyone talking about overdrafts on Twitter? >> Honestly, >> and I was like, "Oh, wow." Okay. And um and it's because I learned to budget. I got student loan and I would instead of splitting it between 10 weeks, I'd split it between 14 for the you know, the like holiday period as well that you'd have off. Um, but yeah, no, budgeting is important. It's something you have to do every month. Do what you need to watch your favorite program in the background, play some music, but make sure you do it. You want to know where your money's going and why. And a lot of people don't and then they're angry later. Even sometimes companies are taking money that they're not they shouldn't be taking out of your account, but you don't know because you're not checking >> literally. Why are you now charging me? And I'm not talking about free trials because free trials gets everyone. >> Free trials, they're like, oh, they take that money out and you're like, great, new subscription for a month. I'm talking about your bills going up and you're not even questioning why. >> If you don't question why your money's going, you don't care about your money. >> What if someone says, "But I really struggle with budgeting. Every time I put my budget together, I never stick to it. And so because of that, I can't save." What would you say to that person? >> I would say on top of using an Excel spreadsheet, which I think is really good, I also use the app Emma. I really love the app and I let it um sync with my main bank account. And um what that does is it tells me what my budget looks like in real time. So if I have after all the like bills I have mortgage and all those bills and so on. If I have like cosmetics and stuff, I make sure I put everything into the categories necessary and transactions because it will show me in real time you're maybe about to go over your limit in this category or you're under. And that's really what I'd suggest because you need something you can trust that will tell you in real time where you are with your money. and you need to go in and I would and I make it one of my main apps >> and it also sends me um a message every morning so I know my balance and the balance either shocks me into >> girl you got to stop. Sometimes I see that balance and I say no coffee outside today >> or I'm like okay I'm all right I've got a little more freedom of movement but you >> apart if you struggle with budgeting check your balance every day >> we wake up we scroll wake up check your balance >> I love it >> that will that cuz trust me it can humble you or excite you >> actually so true I love it and I think I probably would echo like all of the same things. And I think the point on increasing the income is so important because I think that initially the easiest place if you want to save a bit more, the easiest thing to do or the quickest thing to do is to cut back on your expenses, right? Cuz that's something you're probably doing on a daily basis. So you can make daily changes. But there comes to a point where you can no longer cut the expenses. And so your only other option to increase the amount that you're saving, to increase your rate of building wealth, is to increase your income because at some point you're already living in a studio. can't downsize any further or you have four kids, you need a three-bedroom house. So, you can't cut back on that. So, at that point, it's like I have to increase my income. If you're enjoying this content, please don't forget to hit the like button and subscribe. And if you would like to become an international property investor in Dubai or in the UK, the link to book a free consultation will be in the description box below. If you're not quite ready to invest yet, check out the affordable video courses that will also be linked in the description box below. And if you would like to relocate to Dubai, set up your business in Dubai, or anything else related to relocating to Dubai, check out ww.theprofessionalwork.com. I I couldn't agree more. I used to be a cutback merchant, but the cost of living kept living. I said, uhoh, we got to get serious. I was like, VA, time to start asking some questions. And all this network I've built, I said, get professionally aggressive. Which meant that I started asking people straight shoot questions. I said to people, this is how much I'm making. this is the range of how I'm making. How can I get to X? >> And some of them said, let me show you how to get to Y, >> which is a new figure. And the whole point is seven figures, by the way. I just don't want to seem like I'm gatekeeping. And the whole point is that you need to start asking questions. But also, once people, advisers, mentors, friends give you those answers, jump. Take the leap. Don't be that. Because I give out a lot of good information. People say I'm very generous with how much information I give out versus what I get back. And some people and mentors are mad at me cuz they're like, "Stop helping them. Focus on you." >> Nothing is worse than when I speak to somebody and I give them information or advice and I see them again in like a year or whatever because I don't have a personal relationship with them and they are still in the same place and I say to them, "You've wasted my time." >> Honestly, and time, money, and energy are very interchangeable. I do not I do not like it. I like to show up on time, respect people's time, and so on. So, if you ask me for even 30 minutes of my time, and that's generous >> for someone I don't know at this stage on top of having a fiance, having family and friends that you care about, you want to fit that in. Again, I cannot be your therapist. >> If that's the step you need, go out and do it. But if I talk to you, somebody came into my DMs the other day talking about, "Oh, haha, you told me to do this." And and I said, "So, why are we kikiing in the DMs? Go and do it. No, but it's so real. And I think one of the things for me that I always like whenever I have mentors and they tell me to do something, I will never come back to them to have a follow-up conversation if I haven't actioned what they told me before because it's rude. And I remember Damian on the last episode, he was like, "It's just disrespectful. It's actually rude and dis. You keep coming for help, coming for help, coming for help, but you're not taking any action. You keep coming back." Even when I was reading some of the dilemas, I'm like, "But if you've watched the episodes, it's free content that is there for you. What do you mean you don't know where to start? There's so much information there. >> People want their handheld. >> Literally, >> they want their handheld." And I'm like, "Who was holding my hand?" >> Starting out in the corporate world, who was holding my hand when I first became an entrepreneur? Nobody. I learned >> people are afraid to fail privately and publicly, and it is holding them back. And then they wait for you to succeed publicly after they've watched your failures and they're like, "Can I get some help?" No. Go and fail cuz we all did. You're so real. That is is it's so real. And I think that one of the things that I think shocked me into like taking action is one of the things that we have to realize, and this isn't even a a race thing, a g on top of all of the other stuff, right? Forget about race and gender or whatever. The system of capitalism is designed to have a very small group of people at the top and the rest of the people at the bottom. And it's not designed for you to be able to keep climbing up and building wealth. All of this stuff that we're doing, the system is not designed for us to want to to do all of these things. Even if we aspire to it, they give us a little bit of hope, but you're not really supposed to transcend levels. So you have to realize as as an agent, right, that if I don't take action that is going against the grain, it is easy to spend all of your salary every single month and enjoy this and enjoy that. But just know that you're playing into that system. You're feeding that you're doing exactly what they want you to do. But if you say, I want to build wealth and I want to start transcending certain levels and certain income, you have to go against the grain because the system does not want you to do that. So if you're just sitting there, oh, I I I don't save any money. Oh, I don't budget. Oh, I don't invest. I don't do anything. I'm just like, you don't know how how well the system is designed to keep you down and you're just allowing it to keep you down. >> Yep. And I that's why I say to my audience, and I joke about this, I say, don't come looking for me at 50. >> I don't know how much longer. Um, but I say, "Don't come looking. Don't you dare talk about budgeting to me at 50." I studied math and finance. I was at level three just from being in my corporate career and having a higher understanding of money. I came back to level zero to help my community. I have done level one. I have done level two and I'm going to level three. And if you're still trying to talk to me about level zero, you're shocking. Read this. Read this. The content is out there. I think no. We because do you know what? We've been doing gentle parenting on people who aren't our kids and it's not working. It's tough love season. It's tough love season. Love day. I've had enough. >> Um, you do something on your on your page called Finance Fridays, right? Where people kind of send in their dilemas and stuff. What are the common trends that you kind of see with people? Because I would assume some of the people who are watching will also be going through some of that. Maybe you can give some advice around that. >> Um, I get a lot of questions about people being in debt. So I get a lot of questions about that and I'm understanding of certain scenarios. That's why I say everyone's scenario is different. Someone although they weren't in debt, their parent was ill. >> So I understand that. I get a lot of questions about investing. I also get a lot of financial dilemmas regarding relationships >> and that's you know that can be tough because depending on the situation and how much context I have I try not to judge too easily. I'm not a I'm not a a leave them merchant, >> you know. I'm very much a Can you give me a bit more context? Sometimes I say, can you circle back? But what's always important to me is like where is your self-esteem? >> I need to feel like >> you understand your value enough to not allow certain things such as financial abuse. >> So that's kind of like the trends that you're seeing with >> that's really interesting. Um, one of the things that maybe ties in a little bit with that is like emotions and spending. And I think I I remember you mentioning on another podcast that like sometimes when you're um it's like PMS or that time of your cycle, you might spend a bit more. Could you speak a little bit about like people managing their emotions and their spending? >> Yeah, I think as you know there's a well-known
Saying, "Never let success get to your head and failure get to your heart." I think the same goes with emotions when it comes to spending. When we feel really good and really excited. So, once we're at the height of either, we can choose to spend. "Oh my gosh, I've done this. I've got a promotion. I'm spending today. I deserve it." Or, "I feel really sucky about a certain situation. I'm going to spend money to make myself feel better." I used to do that.
One of the things that's so important is you think about what else can I do and what relationship with money am I building through this habit? M: So often, um, I used to be like, "Oh, it's Friday. I'm going to get a takeaway," and so on. Or, you know, I see some people that's like, "Yeah, I'm going to buy some jewelry." And I'm like, that becomes an expensive habit, and you don't have the. Listen, we have to be honest. A lot of people I used to see doing it, I was like, "You don't have the bank account to match." None of us do. We were coming up earning salaries. I'm like, "That's a lot of money you're spending." We have to think wisely. And sometimes I was willing to spend more, and sometimes I'm very tight. I go in between. So, I say that you have to be able to manage your emotions. So, I make systems in my head. PMS is coming up. All I try not to spend because you might be doing this from an emotional space. I'm upset about something. Go to the gym.
>> That's good. Make for all your bad habits, um, translate them into healthy ones.
>> I love that. I love that. Oh, there's so much that we actually haven't even gone through. So, you might have to make a comeback soon. You might have to make a comeback because there's so much I want to go through that we don't even have the time to go through. But let me think.
>> Um, okay. One of the things that I also see as well with the dilemmas is a lot of people who are struggling with guilt. So, they might be watching this and they're like, "Damn, I wish I didn't spend 100k on my wedding. I wish I got started with saving earlier. I wish I got started with investing earlier." What advice would you give to those people?
Don't be like Lot's wife and turn into a pillar of salt by always looking back. I literally just spoke about that on my Instagram. So often, we beat ourselves up for the decisions we made. We cannot change that. All we can do is change the future, and we have to be able to do better things for ourselves, change our mindset, and do new things. I'll give an example. I started the Bolo Show when I was 25, and I had two choices: buy a house at 25 or start the Bolo Show. And I started the Bolo Show. So, I bought when I was like 29, moved in, I think, when I was 30, and I'm okay with that because of where the Bolo Show is now.
>> How I do it and just the career I've built for myself.
>> Um, so it was an investment because a house is not enough if you don't have multiple streams of income in this cost of living and capitalistic,
>> life that we have. So, I'm grateful and I try not to look back on that so often because then I think it rids you of the blessings that came with it.
>> So, even if you spent 100k on a wedding, at the very least, hopefully, you are still in a healthy, happy marriage,
>> and you can look back and you have beautiful pictures and beautiful videos, and that's okay. Start where you are now. That's another saying: "The best time to start anything was 10 years ago. The next best time is now."
>> Yeah. We focus too much on the past.
>> I love that. That, that's good. That's really, really good. Um, and succinct as well. And I think that's all you can do. All you can do is look forward because keep mulling over the past is not going to get you any closer to that goal that you want.
>> Um, so then coming back to yourself and reflecting on your own growth and your own mindset. Is there any areas with regarding to building wealth where you still feel like, "Even I still have a way to go" in terms of the way I think about this particular, this particular thing or this particular area?
I've done a lot of mindset exercising in the last few months.
>> One of the things I've been thinking a lot about is you have to work hard for a long time before you can work hard and smart, and it translates to just smart. And I think a lot of people think you can just work smart. You know, that's the, that's that, that's a new buzzword. "Let's work smart." You've got to hustle first. I'm 10 years in the game, and I've probably got at least another five to 10 before it translates into just a working smart. So, I'm in a place of delegation now, training people to understand how I think and my vision in order to execute it for me. And then once I get enough investment vehicles and stuff where the money is just printing and it's passive, that's the working smart. But that doesn't come overnight. I need capital. So, I need to hustle. And that comes in different ways. It doesn't just come with, as I say, shining my teeth online. It comes with doing other things behind the scenes. And, um, I just think it's important for people to know that because as long as you, as long as you're working, you're not free. And there's nothing wrong with that because we're young, you're supposed to go and get it. And some people just want to win the lottery. I'm like, "You will be bored." You, you think you think you will be bored? And sometimes you won't know what to do with the money, and you wouldn't have earned it, so you won't value it as much as something you've earned. And it's one of the reasons I don't play the lottery because I'm like, "It teaches you a bad lesson about money."
>> Very true.
>> But yeah, I just say you need to understand you need to work hard for a while and work smart at the same time, and then just figure out a system along the way, and bit by bit. It's almost like a race when they're like, "Got the bat." And first, it's work hard, work hard. And then you've got a teammate, and you're like, "Hey, this is how I run and this is how I do things." You pass it to them, and the person behind it is work smart, and then the rest is passive income. It's a, it's a four-part race. Like, you, you've got to see it that way, 'cause I know a lot of people want to break, but baby, so do I.
>> That is a, I love that analogy. I love it. All right, so we're going to be moving on to the wealth boy segment, and this is basically where one of the listeners sends in a dilemma that they have, and they just kind of want to get your opinion on what you think they should do.
>> Um, so let me read this. "Person says, my spouse and I are in debt of 25k pound, started at 10k after our wedding, and it was growing as we were not proactive with the debt. We have about £8,000 on Amex, £5,000 on PayPal, a £5,000 bank loan, and the rest is on overdrafts. We earn £5,500 per month and spend 1.4k. 4K on minimum payments, and then another £3,000 on bills and living expenses. How can we quickly come out of debt, only using our £1,000 per month?" I guess that's the, the amount they have spare a month.
>> Oh, first of all, I think that they need to look at, they need to line up all of their debts, the amount and the APR, the annual percentage rate, so the interest, and look at what's costing you the most, and potentially deal with it in that order. Or potentially, you can, um, snowball as you like. But I think whatever's costing you the most, you just need to eliminate that and go from there. Some people as well, see if possible, and you can do a light check to see if they can get a loan that can basically take up the full amount of all of their debts.
>> Okay?
>> And then basically use that amount and wipe out the other debts. Get rid of them if they're a distraction and they can't trust themselves.
>> Because that's key. Some people don't have financial discipline. That's okay. And then just pay off the one loan.
>> Um, so there's a few options that they can do and look at, but, um, they have to get on top of it. And I also think they shouldn't be afraid to speak to a charity like Step Change or National Debtline. When people have debts like this, they come to us,
>> but it's also okay for them to speak to someone on the phone. Those are charities. They're willing to help as well.
>> Oh, really? So, what would the charity do? Would they pay off your debt?
>> No, more than anything, what they'll just do is maybe give you different solutions and talk about because obviously you can talk to your creditors and stuff like that, but you, like I said, look at what's charging you the most, 'cause I'm thinking, "Okay, overdraft is probably the highest, probably at 39%."
>> Um, I'm sure the
>> Is that how much an overdraft
>> charge? So, yeah. So, overdraft is one of the most expensive forms of debt you can take out in terms of credit.
>> Um, and then loans might be cheaper. Credit cards, you might get between the 20 to 30 rate, sometimes 30 plus. Amex, you know, they have good perks, but you keep a balance, they'll charge you.
>> Um, so I definitely say they need to look into all of that.
>> I love that. I think that's super, um, practical advice. One of the things I kind of wanted to get into is the wedding thing. Um, and I know you recently got engaged, so congratulations to you.
>> Um, but I hate personally, I hate to hear that people get into debt for a wedding. Something about it just really irks me. Uh, maybe it's, it's the, I don't even know what it is, but something about it, and I'm just like, "Really?"
>> It's a day.
>> Yeah.
>> It's a day.
>> This is what people aren't realizing. A marriage is for life. A wedding is a day.
>> That's the thing. That is the thing. So, if there are other, 'cause we've had a couple of people who were, and there was another dilemma we had as well that was like, "I'm in X amount of debt, but I'm planning for a wedding at the end of the year." So, like, and I was like, "Okay, what would your advice be?"
>> Don't go into the marriage with debt as much as possible. Please do not. And two, do not bow to expectations. Do not bow to pressure. 'Cause so many people are like, "Oh, but it has to be like that. It has to be like this." Do you have the money or not? Because the times we're living in is the ones where people are basing their whole lives on other people's social expectations. You're doing trends online of what you think you should do, and you're not actually building wealth for yourself. And this is how you and your spouse get into a cycle of living for everybody else. But who else is paying that mortgage? Who else is filling up your stocks and shares ISA? Who else is doing your pension for you and preparing your kids? Nobody. So, sometimes you have to say, "Hello, hi. We're going to have to cut back on the numbers, or we're going to do this, or we're going to do it smaller." And, you know, someone actually said to me, um, "Oh, I know times are hard because I said I was having a small wedding."
>> I said, I said, "Baby, the average cost of a small wedding, no, the average cost of a wedding in the UK I made in a month. You can check the numbers. I choose to keep my money. I love it." You know what? There's so many things. There's so many things on that. First thing is that I find it really interesting that one of the biggest reasons for divorce is financial problems. And so for you to create that at the point of joining together and take that into the marriage is very interesting. And we've even had a guest on here who was very candid, Haley Melinda, who was talking about like when it was their wedding, she had to, um, bear the, a big brunt of the cost of the wedding, and she's the woman in the relationship, and she was saying how that caused resentment in the marriage going forward, right? And I think that one of the things that I'm starting to realize with weddings, and I think I think we don't realize how much free will we have because we see everything as tradition, and so we think we have to follow things in a particular way and do it how everyone else is do, how everyone is doing it. But I think as I've getting older, more people are getting married, and I'm watching how they do things. So, I remember the first time I went to my friend Chile's wedding,
>> Um, and she had a beautiful wedding in Lake Como. And I don't know if she told me this before or if I saw it on the day, she didn't have bridesmaids. And I remember thinking like, "You didn't have like, I remember I think she told us beforehand. I was like, 'Oh, how many bridesmaids?' or something." She was like, "Oh, I don't have bridesmaids." And I was like, "You don't have bridesmaids?" And then after like going and seeing her wedding and everything happens, I'm like, "I actually didn't notice on the day that she didn't have bridesmaids. It was just the day was centered around her and her husband, and it was a beautiful wedding." And that was the first time I kind of realized, "Oh, you don't actually have to do. There's nothing that says you have to do it like this and this and this and this." And I even remember also recently seeing, um, Renee Kapuku. She, she got engaged and she got married quite soon after, and they had a really beautiful, um, uh, what's the registry, and then like a party afterward, and then they went on like a really nice, um, honeymoon, and they got like, um, they were in like business class for like the flights and stuff, and it was just like,
>> Yeah, like you can actually do it in whichever way you want. And I think when you start removing this whole, because I think that we have this perception that if you don't do it big, it's because you don't have the money for it. And it's just like, some people just don't want to spend the money on it. Like, I have been so adamant on like when I get married in my 20s. I, I've been from way before, I'm not having a big wedding. I, I'm more, I'd love to have a big wedding as a celebration. So maybe like five years into it, 10 years into it, because I think what you, what, what is really more special to me to celebrate is like sustaining a happy marriage. So, yeah, couldn't agree more. I don't have any bridesmaids.
>> Um,
>> You don't have any bridesmaids either? Why did you have a shocked face?
>> No, no. I just, I respect people, especially women. I respect women who do not crumble to society norms because it's very easy for us to give into pressure and feel the need to be at service for everyone and make everyone happy. But then it's like, "Are you making yourself happy? Is this what you want?" I say, I don't have any bridesmaids. My nieces are like faux bridesmaids.
>> Oh, I love that.
>> And they're just going to wear dresses and I'm like, "Pop two, three, four down before me. Go, go, go, go." But the whole point is that,
>> I'm, I'm not doing, I'm not giving into the hoopla. People keep asking me, "Are you stressed?" And to be fair, not really. I do have more on my checklist
>> because I'm an entrepreneur. I do other things as well, but apart from it, I'm all right. How do you deal with like, if your family's pressuring you to like do certain things or have like, I'm African, like have certain numbers? How do you deal with that pressure?
My family respectfully do not pay my bills. They can give me wonderful advice. None of them are living in my time.
>> Because even if I have older siblings, they're not necessarily living in my time because we are not the same age in the same time.
M: So, what I choose to do is with my money and my happiness is now mine. That's the whole point. You're joining with someone else and you're saying, "This is what we'd like to do."
>> And bless my mom, she, I know she would probably like something a bit bigger. But I'm about intimacy. And there's something I say that's very key in marriage: "Make sure you invite the people that when you want to sit down in your marriage, they will stand up for you." And those are the people who get a seat at my wedding. And it doesn't necessarily mean there aren't other people who won't stand up for my marriage. It just means that if the numbers get too big, I think also we have to talk about anxiety and overwhelm.
>> I think enough people, especially because I do a lot of stuff outside, I can talk to a crowd of a thousand, 10,000 at one point, and it's fine. But it doesn't necessarily mean that I always want to have that many people on show on my day and be talking to so many. There's a difference because I'm usually on the stage. When you're on the stage, you can talk to everyone and you can go back, right?
>> Go through the back room.
>> So true.
>> But on the day, a thousand people, thank you. Thank you. I have seen so many brides and I'm like, and grooms, and I'm like, "You don't look happy because you look overwhelmed." It's not that you're not happy, you look overwhelmed.
>> Yeah.
>> Just like I, just
>> I love that. And I think one of the things that I have been telling myself just in life in general is that something can be lovely, and you can really love it for someone else and not want it for yourself.
>> Yes. But I think we don't know how to do that as a society. Like, that is like my brother's wedding was amazing. It was in Portugal, destination, amazing. I loved it. I loved it. And I, I even posted on social media. So many people loved it. Loved it for him. Still wouldn't do it for myself.
>> Yeah. And that's the difference. My sister had a big wedding in Nigeria. Loved it for her. Wouldn't do it.
>> And I told my mom through every sibling. I'm the youngest of six. Told my mom through every wedding I saw with my siblings, "P.S. I'm not doing this."
>> I was like, "Uh-uh, not me." And she used to cut her eye at me because she used to just be like, "Maybe she'll change her mind." And I know when I was engaged, she was so happy, and she tried to send me suggestions. And I just, I really had to put my foot down. Again, you have, as a woman, you're a grown woman, you know,
>> forget just paying your bills. You are a grown woman who I have to make my own decisions. And you said something earlier, and I just, there was a point that you said, I think we need more independent thinkers. I think we need more people who go against the grain of whatever the status quo is because I say to a lot of women, "You can't marry your friends."
>> So many. I know this is supposed to be about finance, but, but, but many people, they make their friendship circle, men and women too, important. Then they get married, and then there can be a sense of betrayal.
>> So, why, you've got to find a good boundary and set that. I'm not saying don't be close with your girlfriends, but have girlfriends who understand that once you go to a new level of life, they can't be calling you at 11 p.m.
>> I love that. I love that. It was such an interesting conversation. I'm interested to hear what you guys think as well. So, leave your opinions in the comment section regarding the dilemma in general, but also with regards to like weddings and debt and stuff like that. Okay. So, we're going to move on to the quickfire money questions. Three questions, and then just tell me the first thing that comes to your mind.
>> So, the first one is, what is the best investment you've ever made?
>> In myself.
>> Yeah, this is our most popular answer. What does that mean?
>> It means I bet on myself when no one else did. Talking about finance at a time when the economy was good, and fashion and beauty was popping, was not popular, but here I am, still relevant 10 years later.
>> Oh, what is the biggest money mistake you've made?
>> Biggest money mistake. That's such a tough one. Um, I think, yeah, when I got my first credit card, I didn't really understand it. So, I don't think I made wise decisions in the first few years.
>> What does that mean? Like, just overspending, not thinking about APR and interest and how it all works together and how much it's costing me?
>> So, it's not necessarily I couldn't pay it off. I was just like, "Oh, I've just got a credit card." And I went with the credit card with who I bank with. And the reason I did is just because I knew them.
>> Whereas now I'm like, "No, what perks am I getting?" And then every time I did a transaction, it would charge me. And I was just like, "Is this normal? Hello, get me out of here." So, it's things like that that you learn, and then you start saying, "But what's in it for me?" And I think a lot of people just feel like, "Oh, thank you so much for letting me in to your, you know, credit card product and so on," as opposed to saying, "In every single thing, hello, hi. What's in it for me?"
>> And what is one piece of advice you'd give to someone who is trying to build wealth?
>> Grow your income. Grow your income. It will make it so much easier. What you can do with 2K versus 20K versus 200K. All the, the difference is the zeros. Grow your income. And if you don't know how, start by networking. Networking is really your net worth.
>> Yeah. I love it. This was so good. We didn't, guys, we didn't touch half of what you wanted us to touch, but it was so good. So, if they're looking to find you, find your book, where can they find you?
>> Ah, let me hold this up. This is, um, an exclusive version because it's, this is a new cover that's coming out. So, "Your Money Life." You can, um, pre-order it. I would say go to the Penguin website because there's different,
>> outlets you can buy this from online.
>> Um, so, of course, like Amazon, Waterstones, all of that good stuff. And yes, I am on social media on Instagram, Ba_Soul. So, BA_SOL. I'm on TikTok. It's just Ba Soul. And yeah, I'm on all the others, you know, the Substacks, the LinkedIns, and so on and so on.
>> Um, but yeah, it's, it's so great that we finally got to do this, and I just think what you're doing is remarkable. I think you are remarkable.
>> Oh,
>> thank you.
>> And I just wanted to say that on your podcast.
>> Thank you. Thank you for coming. Thanks for having me.