Transcription
[Music] All right, guys. Welcome back to Strong Successful Mail. So, for today, I'm going to do a pretty entertaining article titled, "Tik Tok Trauma Queens Are Scaring Off Decent Men for Good." And a shout out to MM for sending this story.
And guys, this article is actually written by a woman, a female writer, female journalist, whatever you want to call her. And pretty much the whole article is her sounding off against boneheaded women, as well as the system, if you will, for chasing away good men. Why so many men are walking away—and not just from marriage. I'm talking about relationships and even dating because they know the mess that's out there.
And this whole article really does hit home about a lot of things that I've been talking about for years. And I got to say this, as much as I appreciate anybody writing articles about this thing that I talk about often and you guys talk about, especially a woman, at the end of the day, it's kind of like, uh, well, that's nice and all, but uh, too little too late because the mass migration away from relationships and marriage has been going on for a while for a good reason.
And I want to believe that her intention is certainly to help guys out. Perhaps she has a brother, a nephew, or a son. I don't know how old she is, that's been impacted in a negative way. So, she's trying to help him out, and I want—I really do want that. But a lot of times it's like, where were these girls back in the day when things are really getting bad? And I have to ask, and I'm sure many of you guys wonder, or is this actually to help them—to help women—to write these things to say where you're screwing up? Because guess what? We're not going to have any guys that want to marry us in time, and things are bad enough now, so we better shape up. Who knows? One has to question that.
But nevertheless, it's a good article, but still, men are walking away no matter what changes anytime soon. She starts off, she says here, "Let us stop pretending we don't know why men are done with marriage. They're not afraid of commitment. They're not toxic. And they're certainly not intimidated by strong women. No, men have just finally figured out what the rest of us should have admitted years ago. It is a terrible deal. Not for women. Oh, no. We've got—we've gained it beautifully. It is for men. And now they know it." Well, right there in the first paragraph, hit the nail right in the head. Yes, we do know it. Or many of us do.
She says, "According to research from the marriage foundation, between 70 to 80% of divorces are initiated by women. Among college-educated women, that number jumps to 90%." Translation: The more educated she is, the faster she realizes she can exit, states left with the house, the kids, the 401k, and a monthly check. All she has to do is say, "Wait for it. I'm not happy." And a judge will handle the rest. Well, sounds about right.
But it's always kind of funny when you occasionally will hear a story about a celebrity divorce where the woman gets taken to the cleaners. I think Halle Berry years ago, and there's other women out there that get taken to the cleaners, and they whine and complain, and the guys are like, "Cuz we know," she says, and what a show this is. He loses his kids, his paycheck, and often his sanity trying to keep up with the court-mandated payments while living in a sad little apartment, granted visitation rights so limited that he needs a calendar app and a court order just to see his own kids. Meanwhile, she's posting hashtags #singlemomstrong, like the children are uh, accessories, as she won the divorce. How exactly is this empowering for anyone? Thank you. Thank you. I appreciate you writing this, young lady. I don't know how old she is. I'm just calling her young lady 'cause she's probably younger than me. Yes.
Why would any guy sign up for something like this? That 50% chance—easily—you get married, you're going to get divorced and in varying degrees deal with this crap. And yet guys do this. It's amazing to me. You know the old analogy, if you were, you know, going skydiving and there's a 50% chance that your shoot wasn't going to open, would you jump out of the [ __ ] plane? I think not.
She says, uh, women's emotional garbage cans. It's not just the divorce itself. It's what leads up to the divorce. Modern women have traded femininity for feral—for feral instinct, egged on by a culture that rewards emotional instability and calls it empowerment. She says, "Think I'm exaggerating? Just spend five minutes on Tik Tok." Um, I'm not going to spend 5 seconds on Tik Tok. Tik Tok is [ __ ] dog [ __ ]. But I know what she means. You will find women screaming into their phones about healing energy and divine feminine rage, si—uh, sipping box wine in a bathtub surrounded by crystals and court sum—summones. I don't the [ __ ] she wrote. These women don't want to love a man. They want to fix their daddy issues with a living, breathing human wallet. Human wallet, ATM, whatever you want to call it. But she's right. Uh, they call it love. Well, what they really mean is trauma alchemy, saying, "If you love me, you'd fix me." No, sweetie. You fix you. Then maybe, just maybe, you'll attract a man who doesn't have to call his therapist after every single date.
I like this gal, and I really, really want to believe that she's doing this to help guys, but I've just seen too many times, actually, things written by women that seem like they're trying to help guys, but they're really helping themselves. But one can hope.
She says this epidemic of emotional dysfunction isn't accidental. Many of these women were raised in homes where masculinity was vilified, fathers were absent, and mothers were so bitter they could uh, curdle milk with a glance. In other words, these now adult, strong, empowered women were raised in single-parent households. Mommy ran the show. She's bitter about Dad, and she wore the pants if—if—if the dad was there raising a gal like this. These girls were handed generational rage and told it was feminism. They did not heal. They—they weaponized their pain and waited for the first dumb man—man dumb enough to step into the rage. And if he's not dumb, he's the enemy. Because how dare he not offer himself up as a sacrifice on the altar of her unprocessed trauma. I—I got to give this woman credit. She writes well.
Uh, now on to the courts. She says, "Courts eat men alive." Family courts, of course, are the handmaids of this dysfunction. The US Census Bureau reports that less than 20% of custodial parents are fathers, despite all evidence that children need both parents. But try telling that to a judge who thinks fatherhood is a weekend hobby and child support is a government-backed extortion racket. Many states rake in billions through Title IV-D incentives. Meaning the more money the state extracts from fathers, the more it receives from the federal government. It's not just it. It is a racket. It's a taxpayer-funded kickback scheme that rewards broken families and punishes paternal love.
Well, I've been saying for a long time there's an incredible effort to destroy the nuclear family. And yes, it is a better deal for children to be in a two-parent household. But of course, preferably Mom and Dad love each other, or at least like each other a hell of a lot. Of course, if Mom and Dad can't stand each other and it's fighting and trauma, then you got to break up, 'cause it's not worth it staying for the kids, 'cause the kids will be caught in the middle of all this craziness. And the worst yet, those kids will grow up thinking that's normal. They'll be in the same relationships. But yes, the best thing possible is the kids being raised in a house where Mom and Dad loved each other.
I was that lucky. My parents had their disagreements, don't get me wrong. The extent I ever heard them actually fighting, and I'm saying that in air quotes, is when they were debating politics, because my mom was—my dad was vastly more conservative than my mom. My mom was conservative with a little "c," you know, but it usually happens that way. And I—I would think they were fighting, and I'm like, "What's wrong? What's wrong?" And they're like, "Oh, no. Just discussing politics. That's it." They worked things out. They communicated. They held hands when they were married for decades. You know, I was lucky. A lot of people think I grew up in a [ __ ] up household. I did not. A lot of people I saw grew up in a [ __ ] up household.
Anyhow, uh, she says here, "Worse, child support is often calculated not on what a man actually earns, but on what the court believes he should earn." That's a load of crap. That is called imputed income. And it's how you turn a plumber into a felon because he couldn't pay child support based on the fantasy that he's a brain surgeon. If he misses a payment, he goes to jail. If she violates a custody order, she might get a warning. Maybe. Yeah. And he goes to jail. And how's he supposed to keep up with payments if he's behind bars? It's like [ __ ] debtor's prison. This is not equality. This is *Turner v. Rogers* in action. The Supreme Court ruled in 2011 that authorities can lock a man up for not paying child support without providing him a lawyer. Land of the free indeed.
So, I'm not done this article yet, guys. Was this sound like a great deal to you? All you guys out there that uh, have been divorced and in varying degrees have gone through hell, you know what I'm talking about. You know what she's talking about here. And I'm—I'm assuming a lot of you don't do it a second time. And for all you guys out there that are younger, have not been married, I hope this [ __ ] sinks in.
Uh, here's what—what's wild. Women still do not get it. Men aren't angry at women. They're—well, some are. Come on, honey. Some—actually a lot of guys are angry with the attitudes that a lot of the women have. We're not—let's not [ __ ] here. Uh, they're done with them. Like this woman said, men are done negotiating with feral energy. They're not trying to win any argument anymore. They're exiting the game quietly, permanently, and still the same women who created the chaos stand around wondering where did all the good men go. Yep. We're out of here, honey. Uh, honey, they're over there dodging alimony, living in peace, and thanking God that they never married you. Married you. Amen. You know how many guys' stories I've covered that are divorced, they went through hell, and they all say, "You know what? I'm so happy I went through it. It was hell. Peace and quiet." You know, now on to empowered women, depressed men.
Uh, here's the kicker. We're not even ashamed of it. She's talking about women. We brag about it. We meme about it. Divorce glow-up, trauma bonding, soft girl era. Meanwhile, the men are just trying to stay out of court and off of anti-depressants. Feminism, please. This is narcissism with a publicist. Well, many are narcissists. Men want peace. They want loyalty, partnership, and respect. They want what their grandfathers had. A woman who had their back, not a woman who records their fights via social media clout. Thank you.
Now, let's not kid ourselves. Back in the time of our grandparents, there obviously was disagreements and problems and cheating and all that. Let's not kid ourselves here, but certainly it wasn't a world like it is now. That's—that's for certain. And that part is about men wanting peace. You bet your ass they want peace. The older men get, the more they want peace and quiet. That's always a big complaint that women have as they get older. I've noticed in married couples that the husband wants to stay at home. He becomes a homebody. He loves his home. He loves maybe his workshop in the garage. He loves just his—his house, his neighborhood, he put his life into. And she wants to go out and keep doing [ __ ], you know. And I don't fault her for that. It's just that men and women are different. They still want to be out and doing stuff and socializing. That's the female energy. Men want peace and quiet because they dealt with all that [ __ ] their whole [ __ ] lives. And I'm sure a lot of you guys watching this that are 40-plus know what I'm talking about.
She goes on saying, "But those women are rarer than ever. We've traded homemaking for hot girl summer, traded character for chaos, and traded companionship for control. And then we expect men to marry us." She says, "News flash, men don't marry liabilities." Well, actually, men do. A lot of men, but fewer are, thanks to information like this. We told them they were not necessary. We told them masculinity was toxic. We told them they owed us emotional labor, financial support, and full-time access to their phones. And when they refused, we called them weak. Now they're gone, and we still have the audacity to act confused. Maybe it's time we stop blaming men for not wanting us, and start asking if we're actually worth wanting. Hey, there you go. Until we clean up the emotional landmines, stop weaponizing the courts, and remember what being a woman actually means, we're not a risk worth taking. We're not a risk worth taking. And any man who walks away from this mess isn't afraid of commitment. He's just smart enough not to sign up for a state-sanctioned mugging disguised as romance. That was well written. That was a good article.
Now, I'm not done yet. There's a bunch of comments about this from women, and I'm going to read those, making my point here. But anyhow, yeah, this hits the nail right on the head why so many are walking away and more are. You know, I see these articles—I glance at occasionally. And I don't do story—I don't do videos on these articles, but I—I read them. How more and more young people aren't doing relationships and dating like they did when I was younger and certainly for you older guys, even more when you were younger. They're either waiting later; it's just not a big deal to them. It's not a priority. And the ages of people getting married is getting pushed off later and later. That's a good thing. But uh, it doesn't help with uh, birth rates or anything like that. But again, you can't blame these guys, you know, and that—and you know what this one thing this article did not address, which is very important, but they didn't, is the behavior—thanks to social media and dating apps—on women out there, particularly younger women, attention-craving young women that flaunt themselves and all that. That's another factor that's pushing men away. Obviously, the percentage—more of that is happening when they're younger. Don't get me wrong, middle-aged women, even older women still flaunt themselves, want attention and validation online and all that, but especially the young generation. And we haven't even covered things like men discovering that the girls they're seeing are secretly on OnlyFans or stuff like that, that also is pushing away guys. So, it's a big giant mess out there. And you can't blame men at all.
And I've been saying this for a little while now that it's interesting that a lot of guy—I'm starting to see things pop up on Reddit stories where guys are rejecting women because they found—found out they were doing OnlyFans or—or videos or some sort of type of spicy material, and they're saying, "Oh, hell no." And these girls are whining and complaining about it. That's just starting now because a lot of these girls have that started in on that in college age, when 2020—when OnlyFans really took off when COVID was going on. You know, that was 5 years ago. Well, now those girls that were in college are now in their mid-to-late 20s. So, imagine another five more years when more of them were doing that and they want to settle down, and guys are saying, "Oh, hell no." Guys are smart enough to do their homework now. Or at least a lot are. And all these gals are ready to finally stop their hoe phase, if you will, or stop being crazy, and they can't get a guy. And you're going to see more and more articles popping up, blogs, TikToks of these girls are now in their mid-to-late 20s whining because they can't get a guy because, you know, their past actions—like men are supposed to just accept that behavior. No, absolutely not.
Now, the good thing is there are still—and I—I stand by this because I know some—some good women out there, but sadly it's becoming rare and rare, and people can debate and argue what is the definition of good. But at the end of the day, I—I think something that if I could see it as good, I think you would agree with me there. But anyhow, guys, it is—we are in interesting times, and our time is—is definitely on the rise. Just got to be smart about it.
Now, I'm going to read some comments from other women based on this, sharing the same perspective. Uh, this woman says, "Wow, just wow. Watching my son-in-law struggle to pay child support after losing custody of his three boys through a court with women judges and advocates who choose to ignore documents showing him to be the better parent. Her fiscal irresponsibility and lack of involved parenting. All of this is true, but seldom so forcefully stated." That's from a woman. That's from a former mother-in-law who's basically saying her daughter's a [ __ ] mother, but she still got the custody of the three kids. I like to know why she couldn't speak before the judge or anybody else to say my daughter is [ __ ]. But look what happened.
There's another one. This is from a woman. She says, "Once upon a time, the courtship period lasted as much as a couple of years. A gold digger would—would have had the patience to stick around that long, and the heat of the moment would fade over time. If you settle for a quicky marriage, it might be at least in part your fault. Picking somebody you want to spend the rest of your life with isn't easy. And that's why few do it. Think before you say 'I do.'" In other words, what this woman is saying is these people—these people that rush into marriage, these guys, because they think they got themselves a pretty girl and they want to lose her. That's stupid. Take your time to get to know who she is. Eventually, her true colors will come out. Or you can do—you can do your homework on her. I agree.
Another one. This is from a woman. She says, "My sons are getting advice from me to be very cautious when forming a relationship with a woman, especially where marriage is concerned. Do not rush into anything and make every effort to ensure that she's actually a respectful person that has no ulterior motives or—or attitude of superiority. Marrying the wrong woman can absolutely ruin a man's life. It's not something to be taken lightly." Well, good for Mom there saying that, but uh, at the end of the day, all it takes is some boneheaded simp guy who thinks that I found a unicorn and doesn't want to hear from anybody that she's anything but a unicorn. And there's no such thing as unicorns—only in, you know, the Harry Potter universe or Lord of the Rings or whatever the [ __ ] it—they are—they are in—
One more—this guy—this is from a dude. He says, "According to the American Psychological Association, approximately 40 to 50% of first marriages end in divorce—about the same odds as winning at blackjack in Vegas. Nearly 70% of divorces are initiated by women; this number increases to around 90% for college-educated women, as they said in the article. Would you buy a car that would not run 40 to 50% of the time? Would you buy a home with a roof that leaks 40 to 50% of the time? Would you fly an aircraft that fails 40 to 50% of the time? Would you have surgery that's only 40 to 50% of the time—or—successful 40 to 50% of the time? Odds of having a successful marriage are not so great. You can draw your own conclusions why." Amen.
So, there you go, guys. Thought to be a good one to go over here, making the point. Yes, we're walking away, and they are noticing. Again, I—I want to believe and have hope that—that—that the gal that wrote this—and she wrote this very well. I like how she writes—had every intention to help us, but there's the part of me that's a cynic, and you can't blame me, that thinks, is it for us or is it to help them—to help women shape up? Well, you really want to help out guys or frankly help yourselves. Get your [ __ ] acts together. Speak—speak your mind. Do you
What you can do to help the course be more favorable, but at the end of the day, you all did this to yourselves. So, we shall see.
All right, guys. That is it for today. Be sure to comment down below. Let me know what you think about this. And guys, if you find a good article you want me to cover, or your own personal story you want to share, if you so dare, send it my way. Strong successful mail@gmail.com. And if it's a good one, I'll definitely cover it. And be sure to like the video, share with your friends, and subscribe. I'll catch you next time.