How to relate with your DESTINY PARTNERS

I'm sharing this morning on how to relate with your destiny partners, how to relate with your destiny partners. Please open with me this morning to Genesis chapter 2, verse 18 to 20. I want us to take a closer look at verse 18 and verse 20 of Genesis chapter 2.

Genesis 2:18 (Contemporary English Version) says, "The Lord God said, 'It isn't good for the man to live alone.'" This was so at that time, and unto this present time, this is still the position. God could have released grace upon Adam to permanently live alone, but in his infinite wisdom, God saw that that wasn't still a perfect situation. And then, having said that, he said, "I need to make not just a partner, but a suitable partner for him."

Then let's take a look at verse 20 from the Contemporary English Version. It says, "Then the man named the tame animals and the birds and the wild animals." That's how they got their names. He said, "None of these, none of the animals, including domesticated animals, none of the birds, none of the wild animals, none of these was the right kind of partner for the man."

Now, I throw a little light on the importance of divine helpers in the process of your life, here or not, as you go on to fulfill your divine purpose in life, as you go on to fulfill your divine destiny here on earth. One of the gifts that God will give you will come in the form of human vessels. Some will come in the capacity of divine helpers, and some will come in the capacity of partners in destiny. God uses them in different areas of life. It will sum in your spiritual life. Some of your divine helpers and partners in destiny will be used by God in ministry, some in your marital life, family life, emotional needs. It will also use some of them in the realm of your career, some in the realm of business, and some in the realm of financial empowerment. And then, of course, some will also be used to fulfill certain aspects of your divine purpose and destiny.

Divine helpers, partners in destiny, God will raise up certain men and women to help solve certain problems in the process of your time here on earth. Some of these problems may not be about you directly. Sometimes it could be concerning someone very closely connected to you. It could be a son, it could be a daughter, it could be a relative or a benefactor. Some of your divine helpers and partners in destiny will be used by God for your promotion to come to pass, your placement to come to pass. He will use men and women to help you realize your peak potentials in different realms of life. And then, of course, God will raise one man, one woman, to fulfill so many of these functions so mentioned. And one of such people that could place so many, fill up the gap, and impact your life for different purposes is your husband or your wife.

So you can more better understand the context of God's move that started from Genesis chapter 18. Now, there are many advantages of helpers, men and women through whom the purpose of God, the answer to our prayers, advancement in life will be fulfilled. From time to time, you would need to be able to assess and benefit from the resources and privileges of certain people.

For some of them, what you need from them is their wisdom, and it can come in the realm of teaching, it can come in the realm of preaching, they can come in the realm of advice, it can come in the realm of articles, books, their comments, and their answers to questions. At the time, people traveled from across the world just to hear the wisdom of Solomon. For some of those people, you would need to tap from their expertise, some from their experience, some from their God-given talent, special ability, personal strength in some realm or activity. And for some, their position, like Queen Esther, who was privileged to be positioned as the first lady of the nation at a critical time in the affairs of God's people. Some of these people will be a blessing to your life using their influence or authority. Some will need to benefit from their time, service. And then some people will be a blessing to your life by their impartation of some kind of valuable information. Of course, material resources, financial resources is another major channel through which human vessels are used by God to be a blessing to the lives of people. And of course, some of them will need their expert advice, different avenues through which they can help. And then, of course, the grace of God upon them, the grace of God upon them.

Now, talking about operations, the duration of the operation. Some of these divine helpers and partners in destiny would come into your life for a particular, just for a particular need or goal in your life to be addressed, a problem to be solved, a particular need to be met, a goal to be achieved. Some others will come at a certain age and phase of your life, and after that phase, possibly for the rest of your life, you may never even see some of them again. And then there will be some of your divine helpers and partners in destiny that from the time you come in contact with them, God is going to permanently use them over and over to be of positive influence and blessing to your life for a lifetime.

It's quite interesting to note that before Eve was created by God, something happened in verse 20 of Genesis chapter 2. God didn't just create Eve. Even when God had decided that it was not good that Adam should be alone, he didn't just create Eve immediately. After God had made that intention clear, the nesting would read in verse 20 is that none of those existed. Those animals that God himself had created, and many of them had different types of characteristics, attitudes, and strengths, abilities, but in all, at the end of the day, God still did not find any of them suitable as a suitable companion or partner for Adam.

I want you to take note, verse 20 is deeper than you read literally. In the process of life, you are going to observe that you will sometimes come across people that carry some of the negative attitudes of some of these creatures of God that made God say no to them. And today, it is not a coincidence about a reality of life that you actually see people use certain animals to describe people with certain kinds of attitudes. The brother taught his thoughts as well before Adam, but God said no, you can't walk hand in hand with the tortoise. The snake was also brought before Adam, and God said no.

One of those submissions that people have made about the Samaritan woman in John chapter 4. The woman met Jesus at the pool, at the well, and Jesus had the revelation, by revelation, had a word of knowledge that this woman had a complicated marital life. She was currently living with a man she was not married to. Beside that, she had had five other husbands. And some people have sat down to analyze how circumstances of life could bring a woman to that kind of situation. Because the interesting thing is this, the woman did not necessarily now have to get married to five different men. So, one significant thing is that this woman actually loved the marriage institution. She was a woman that wanted to be married. But the interesting observations some have profiled about what could have led her from one to two to three was that after her first marriage failed, she had challenges, obviously, from the second one. Because one of the challenges that could possibly have played out was that in the second husband, she saw set one or two traits that she could not cope with, which obviously her first husband never manifested all through her first marriage.

I have shared this sometimes with believers and disciples of the Lord. I said, do you even observe that sometimes it's not so easy for someone who has been exposed to certain ministries where there is quality word content, certain ministries that have that are given to fervent prayer and given to some other aspect of spirituality and fellowship? Sometimes it may not be very easy for someone who has been in such an environment for a long time to easily cope with a ministry that doesn't have any of these spiritual qualities expected from a grounded ministry. So obviously, some of those negative traits, the same way that God rejected each of those creatures, the domestic, that's the domesticated animals, the birds, and even the wild animals, as partners, as wrong partners in marriage for Adam. In the same way, they are people exhibiting attitudes, behaviors that are in alignment with some of the traits we are talking about.

So, by the time that woman would have gone to the tenth husband, she could have seen something that was not in the, the same fault of the second husband was not there, but she would have discovered another fault altogether. So, at the end of the day, what do we learn from this? There are certain kinds of attitudes that every one of us must personally walk out to manifest consistently towards our friends, our partners, and those that God has raised us to be a divine helper to or a partner in destiny.

So, I share with you seven categories of attitudes that boost relationships. From the first group, this group demands that you consistently show love, either to him or to her or to the people involved. This group demands that you consistently show love, give that person care and support, be sensitive to their feelings, be sensitive to their current situation. It demands that you show sincere concern in the person's well-being. This person could be your husband, it could be your wife, it could be your son, it could be your daughter, it could be your parents, it could be your siblings, your friends, your neighbors. It demands that you show kindness, kindness, generosity to that person. It demands that you extend hospitality to such people. It teaches us to be hospitable to people, particularly to those we have identified as key relationships in our life and destiny. And lastly, this group demands that you be warm and selfless, be warm, be selfless in your attitude, in your relationship with such a person or group of people.

Then, in the second group, we see another dimension of the manifestation of attitude, and it's this. It centers around integrity. Under this group, we are taught to build our lives to be men and women of integrity. If people are going to keep us as their friends, and more importantly, as their close friends, we must work on ourselves to be men and women of integrity. Under this group, we are taught that whoever that man or woman is that is important to your life, be truthful to him, be honest with him, be honest with him, be a promise keeper, be a promise keeper. Whenever you make a promise to such, to that man, to that woman, to that valued, really, in that valued relationship, do all you can to keep to your promise. And then, as much as possible, avoid making vows. But if and when you make a vow, integrity demands that you go out of your way to do all you can to keep to your vow. We are also taught under this dimension of attitude to be responsible. Yes, be responsible. Never abandon your duty, never abandon your obligation, especially when you are in a partnership. Don't ever make yourself a parasite to any man or woman. Don't ever make yourself a leech to any man or woman. You have to be very careful. If God has shown you so much mercy, and there is someone there that has consistently helped, helped, and helped, there could be a temptation. There could be a temptation that even when you are now able to stand on your own, or you have enough of whatever that person is helping you with, there could be a temptation to keep on taking or asking from that person, even when God has not empowered you to stand on your own. Be responsible. Be willing to pay the price of your decision, your choice. The moment you have made up your mind to get married to a particular person, there's a price you have to pay. Yes, there's a price you have to pay as a result of your choice of that man or woman in marriage. You must be ready to pay the price that comes with your choice, with your marital decision, with your relationship decision. Under this second dimension, we are also taught to be consistent. We are taught to be consistent. Be a consistent man, be a consistent woman. And when you are consistent, very, very, very, very valued people will eventually take note of your consistency and team up with you. They will draw closer to you. Under the same platform or group, we are also taught to be transparent in our dealings. Be transparent, be transparent in your dealings. Sometimes, if it has to do with fidelity, be transparent as much as possible. Don't give room for suspicion. Don't give room for suspicion. Be transparent in your dealings. Be transparent when it comes to issues of money. Make everything open, make everything open as much as possible. And sometimes it will be wise for you to let certain people know that beyond your obvious stream of income, you have a second or a third stream of income. So that when certain things begin to happen materially or in terms of assets or acquisitions or investments, and it doesn't match the volume of your known stream of income, at least that person that is close to you will understand where the resource is coming from. Because if you're in a partnership, that your partner may begin to think that you know, you seem to be diverting some of the profit coming from your joint business. So be transparent in your dealings so that there will be no suspicions. And be accountable to him, be accountable to her. This is very vital in nurturing vital and close relationships with our divine helpers and partners in destiny.

Under the type group, this centers around sincerity and the right motive in the telling things you know you do not, you don't, you don't, you can't even put up with it in a marriage situation. Be sincere. Don't pretend to like something because that is what your partner wants, knowing fully well that you are not given to such things. But because it is obvious that, oh, if you are not given to such things, then that partner will back out of the culture. Some people are now decide to pretend that they like what they don't like. I said, in life, there are some things you cannot pretend about, like moral values, like moral values. If someone is a very godly man or a very, especially a very godly man, and who seems to be very particular about moral values, obviously such a man will want to marry a woman that also has high moral values. You may not share the same values and likes with your dear partner, but there are some foundational values that obviously the two must share. And that is where Amos 3:3 comes in, that two cannot be in agreement except they cannot walk together except they be in agreement. You may not agree over everything, you may not like virtually the same thing, but there must be agreement over some foundational values. So, when it's obvious that this man is so particular about morality, and for you, you don't share such value, we have seen situations where, in order to still get the person to hook up with you in marriage, one party decides to pretend to share certain values that the person obviously does not share. And you know, you know, with a process of time, you can't pretend forever. In the process of time, it will become obvious, and eventually ultimately obvious to the whole public that this person never, never shared this kind of value in the first place. I have a right motive for the relationship. Have a right motive. Have a right motive for the relationship.

And then group four. Under this group, we are taught on issues surrounding loyalty. Proverbs 20:6 says, "Every man will boast of his own righteousness, but a faithful man, a loyal man, who can find?" Every man will approach you and assure you that he will be there for you all your lifetime, if only you team up with him, if only you will marry him. Or how many are saying the truth? These things are old, and they are from scripture. At times, be consistently loyal to him, be consistently loyal to her. Every man will boast of his own faithfulness, his loyalty. He said, "But a faithful man, who can find?" So, if we are going to go far in our relationship with our divine partners in destiny, our divine helpers, be consistently loyal to that man, to that woman. Be trustworthy. Look at the virtuous woman, Proverbs 31:10-12. Proverbs 31:10-12: "Virtuous woman, who can find? Her prize is far above rubies. A husband's heart does safely trust in her." Very dependable wife, very reliable wife, a pillar behind her husband, a pillar behind a husband. Be trustworthy. Beyond marital relationship, it applies to different settings of relationship. One in an organization, eventually whoever is at the top of that organization would need men and women he can trust. And eventually, when that trust is there, he will elevate them closer to where he is at the top, above others. In the same platform, be trustworthy, be reliable, be dependable. And then, still lastly, under this group, we are taught on confidentiality. Yes, it is in the scriptures. It is in the scriptures. There are people that the scriptures will describe as talebearers. Talebearers, and the Bible tells us to be careful about such people. And what is the Bible telling us about them? Says, such people cannot keep classified information. Anything they see, they talk, they say, they share it out. They can abuse assets and familiarity. So be careful about such people.

And then group five. In this group, we are taught on the essence of respect and mutual respect. Respect and mutual respect. I know you are the father of this, of that man, but God expects us to also even give some, show some mutual respect, some measure of respect to even your own children, to your grandchildren. Talk less of your spouse or your own parents. To keep your relationship, you will need to give respect. You will need to treat certain people with respect. There has to be mutual respect. The same way certain people respect you, they honor you, you must learn to give it back to them. You must also learn to respect them, or else one day there will be a clash, and you won't like what will happen. You won't like what will happen. Do not abuse familiarity. You are bound when you get closer to someone, you are bound to see certain things, know certain things, and the person will become freer with you. When you, when you get closer to people, when you get closer, you'll be privileged to see what will never be seen outside. Don't abuse familiarity. Don't abuse familiarity. Don't take him for granted. Sometimes that man is ordained to be your partner in destiny for life, a path to your course for life. And do you know one thing about relationships? Relationships go beyond the man, you and the person, and goes down to your children. And that is why in Proverbs, there is a warning in Proverbs. It says, "Forsake not your father's friends." Forsake not your father's friends. A man that really loved your father, there is a 95 percent probability, if truly he really loved your father, not cosmetic or conditional love, there's a 95 probability that that same love will flow in some ways towards these children of that man he's so much loved. If there's anything tomorrow, one of those people that could on his own, on their own, rise up on your behalf to help, could be your father's friends, your father's friends. So the Bible says, forsake not your father's friends. Be peaceful. Avoid frequent quarrels. Avoid shouting, rage, or violent reactions.

And then group six teaches us unforgiveness. Yes, every relationship must be nurtured with forgiveness. In the process of life, there will be conflicts at certain times with your ordained partners in destiny. Take note of this: the occurrence of conflict is not what confirms that somebody is not ordained for you, and the absence of conflict does not confirm that someone is the real ordained choice. And then, when we show forgiveness, we must also learn as much as possible to avoid repeating whatever we have been forgiven of, because that is one of the reasons that even provokes our partners more, when something that has been closed in the past is done all over again. Then, in addition, follow-up to forgiveness, there must be timely reconciliation. You must show tolerance. Don't ask, expect a perfect person, simply because it's been confirmed that that person is God's choice or is God's will for you. No, you must learn to tolerate certain imperfections. And some of this will go for some time. There must be patience and understanding.

And then the last one under group seven, we are taught on the need for gratitude. Gratitude. You would need to express how much you appreciate that person from time to time. Your expression of gratitude is part of what keeps the relationship going. Reward her sufficiently. Reward him sufficiently. Add value to him in every possible way. Add value to her life in every possible way. Promote him, promote her. Assist her to be promoted. Assist him to be promoted. Empower him, empower her.

So, by the time these are, this is quite comprehensive. There is no way you will consistently manifest a majority, a majority of these identified positive attitudes under these seven dimensions or categories towards a particular person, towards a family, towards a group, and it will not change your value in their sight. These are time-tested keys. These are relationship boosters that when applied, takes your relationship with such partners in destiny to a much deeper and closer level.