6 Micro Habits of Top 1% Women

We've all seen her before. Yes, the lady with all the confidence. The one that seems to have all the discipline because her body literally looks like she never leaves the gym. Also, let's not get started with her personality. Everyone seems to love her even on and off social media. And when it comes to finances, it seems like she has loads of them.

This is what we would consider to be the top 1% of women. The women that it seems like they literally can do no wrong and they are perfect. And it often has us asking ourselves, how did that happen? Was it genetics? Were they literally born this way? Was it that they came from a really great upbringing and they had amazing parents? Or was it that they just had mommy and daddy's money, so they were able to afford to do all these things?

And yes, for some individuals that might be true, but I've actually found out after doing hours worth of research and also being fortunate enough to meet some of these top 1% women myself, there's a lot of similar traits that they share that actually have nothing to do with finances. It has nothing to do with genetics and it actually has nothing to do with their upbringing.

So in this video, that's what I want to share with you. I want to share with you six habits, essentially six traits that the top 1% of women, the top creme de la creme of women do that a lot of times the other 99% of us are trying to figure out how to do. So in this video I want to talk about that.

The first one is they take responsibility without taking blame. I think this is so imperative to learn, especially if you grew up in a household where when you did something wrong, you were reprimanded in a way of being chastised, being hit, being cussed out. Because I don't think a lot of us realize if we are raised like this, we start to take blame for our actions contrary to taking responsibility for our actions. Because our parents constantly blame us for doing something wrong. And they actually don't make us responsible for actions because they literally do not tell us what we did was wrong and what is the consequence of what we are doing.

There's this thing of us being so fearful of not being caught doing something. Us being fearful of not doing the wrong thing that we actually never ask ourselves what will this thing lead to. We always are worrying about I just don't want to get in trouble. I just don't want my mom to catch me. I don't want my mom to be mad at me.

And let me give you an example of this that I think a lot of people can relate to. So, let's take it back to when we used to have to take out the meat before our mom came home. And this is before we had phones. And this is when our mom literally used to write a note saying, "Take the meat out when I get home." We've all had this happen before where we hear our mom pulling up or it's about time for our mom to come home from work. And we're like, "Oh my gosh, I forgot to take out the meat. Oh my gosh, I forgot to put it in some warm water." And then we try whatever we can do really fast to essentially defrost the meat. The problem is we are so fearful of getting cussed out, of getting chastised, of getting in trouble that we are literally just trying to avoid trouble. We are literally just trying to avoid blame. We are not defrosting the meat so we can eat tonight.

But if you think about it, isn't that the whole reason? The whole reason our mom wants us to do that is so when she comes home from work, she can cook. But because she never asks us to take or never tells us, teaches us essentially to take responsibilities for our actions. When she comes home, instead of explaining to us, hey, if you do not take out the meat at night, you won't eat. What did she do? Why didn't you take out that meat? You should have took out that meat. I've been working all day and you ain't take out that meat. And so, we're so fearful of making the wrong decision that we never learn essentially to take responsibility for our actions. We're so fearful of essentially doing the wrong thing because we're never explained to, hey, this leads to this. Take out emotion. Take out blame. Take out shame. If you do this thing, then this thing is going to happen. We could have been hungry all day. But what is the first thing we think about when we hear our mom coming home? I'm going to get in trouble. We don't even think what's the consequence of the action? Us not eating even though we are hungry because we were never taught to take responsibility for our actions.

And so what does that look like when we become adults? This looks like you waking up late and not being able to go to the gym to work out like you said you were going to. And instead of you taking responsibility for that action and saying, "Okay, I woke up late. Why did I wake up late?" Because individuals who take responsibility for their actions look at this as data. That's data telling them, "Okay, this thing led to this thing. If I don't want this outcome anymore, I need to do something differently."

A lot of individuals who grew up with that blame turned that blame into their identity because what did your parents tell you when you got a good bad grade? What's wrong with you? Why can't you pay attention? Why why are you acting dumb or why you acting? So there's this thing of that literally becoming our identity. You get what I'm saying? I hope these analogies make sense. And so when you wake up late in the morning, instead of you looking at it as data and saying, "Hey, why did I wake up late? Did I go to sleep late last night? Did I drink too much water and I woke up to have to use the bathroom? Did I drink coffee too late? Did I drink an energy drink? Instead of you using what happened as data so you can correct it for next time. Instead, what you do is say, "I'm so lazy. I'm so lazy. Like, I can never wake up early in the morning. I'm so lazy. I can't even do this." And you literally turn that into your identity. And so time and time again, i.e. you keep making the same mistake because you're so used to blaming yourself. Since you were a child, anytime something bad happened, you were constantly blamed. So, as you grow up, you constantly blame yourself.

Now, I know some people are kind of like, "Well, how do I get out of that?" Because yes, I did grow up like that. And yes, I do blame myself, but I don't want to be like that for the rest of my life. So I want to tell you a theory that was coined by the psychologist Julian Roder in 1966 that actually talks about the difference between people who take responsibility and people who take blame and essentially how to get out of that mindset.

So his theory basically states people with an internal locus of control believe their actions influence their outcomes which leads to higher achievement and essentially better stress coping. Now what does that mean internal locus of control? Basically what he's saying in that theory is individuals who believe the things that they do lead to the outcomes of their life are better at course correcting and essentially making the necessary changes to change their life because they genuinely believe where I am in life is because of the things that I am doing and if I want to get somewhere else in life I need to do things differently. The difference with individuals who essentially do not have this internal locus of control, they have a external locus of control. They feel like outside things are essentially why they are where they are in their life. And this comes from a sense of blame growing up. This can comes from a sense of avoidance growing up.

So what you have to do is first and foremost realize yes, you might have came from a background of poverty. You might have came from a background of welfare. You might have a came from a background of people not knowing how to manage money. That is not your responsibility to course correct the past. It is your responsibility to course correct the future. It is your responsibility to take the necessary resources that are available for you to figure out how to be more financially literate. It is your responsibility to figure out how to gain more skills so you can get a better job. The problem with people who are so used to blaming their outside situation or they're even so used to blaming themselves for things, what do they say? Well, of course I'm going through this situation. My mom was, you know, on welfare. My grandma was on welfare. My whole family came from poverty. And they look at it as an external locus of control. They look at it as there's nothing I can do. I cannot control my situation. I cannot change my situation. And so, they don't even realize they literally got there because of their actions. Your actions are essentially why you are where you are in life, whether you like it or not. Don't get me wrong, there are advantages and disadvantages depending on your background, your race, all these other things. I'm not taking away from that. But you also have to understand there's a lot of things that you've been doing that have put you in the situation that you're in and you don't acknowledge those things because that feeling of acknowledgement, you're so used to blaming and you're so used to shaming. And since a child, what have you always tried to run away from? That blame and that shame. And when you were a child, in the physical sense, you always couldn't run away from your parents. But now that you're an adult, the emotional sense, you are so used to running away from that feeling of blame. You don't want to I'm blaming myself for doing this. I'm blaming myself to do that. You're running away and you're not taking responsibility for your actions because you've never had to do that.

And so essentially, how to help this and how I think a lot of 1% women do it differently is because they realize blank, least the blank. Let's take out all emotions. If I go to sleep at a certain time, I'm going to wake up at a certain time tired. If I work a certain job, I'm going to work make a certain amount of money. That's just what that is. Let's stop taking into account, oh, the the country is going like this and the economy is going like that. They literally say, if I do this, it will lead to this. And if I don't like what it has led to, I need to course correct. I need to essentially change where I'm working. I need to gain more skills. I need to become more financially literate. I need to change my workout routine. If something is not giving me the results that I want, that data that I'm collecting, right? If it's not giving me the data that I want, then I need to correct the beginning if I want to get a different ending.

And so, I wanted to start with that because that is one that I notice a lot of 1% women do. And that's something that I definitely have struggled with due to my upbringing. But they take responsibility for their actions, but they don't blame themselves. They don't dwell on the things like, "I'm so dumb and I shouldn't have done this and I shouldn't have done that." They realize this is their first time on earth and they're going to make mistakes, but they also realize that they don't have to blame themselves for it and they can change their outcome by literally changing their actions. And so that's what I want you to understand. You cannot change the past, but you can change your outcome by literally changing your actions.

Now, the next one is they use visualization and mental rehearsals. This is something that I think a lot of people do not believe in enough because it is not something physical. There is a thing of you saying I want to be more productive. I want to be more disciplined. I have to physically do something that is going to lead to this thing. And I promise you, you can change your life through the visual.

Now, a lot of people when they think about the visual, they think about manifestation. and they think about, oh, me manifesting this thing and me imagining myself walking across the stage and getting my diploma, me imagining myself getting that $100,000 order. That's not necessarily visual rehearsal. That is more so you visually thinking about yourself accomplishing that thing. And there's nothing wrong with that, but actually visual rehearsal has been proved by neuroscience. So, let me explain that a little bit more as well.

Now this works because mental rehearsals activate the same region of the brain as physical action which leads to better outcomes and more confidence. Now that is why visual rehearsals work because when you close your eyes or you can do it open depending on your preference and you visualize yourself doing the thing that's necessary for you to achieve the outcome that you want to achieve. Your brain a lot of times cannot tell the difference between you actually doing that thing and you visually rehearsing that thing so well that you are physically doing that thing. And that's why I said it's a little bit different from manifestation because manifestation is more so you saying I'm walking across the stage and I'm receiving my diploma and I'm doing these things. Visual rehearsal is you actually doing the necessary things to do those things. And it's crazy that people don't talk about this enough, but there's athletes, high performing athletes who have been doing this for decades. I'm talking about since the 50s, since the 60s. There's top golfers who have imagined themselves literally putting the haw into the hole and they've said it on interviews before. People have asked them, "How did you do it?" And they're like, "I've just visualized it." There's boxers who literally have done the boxers, if you're familiar with boxing, they literally do something called shadow boxing. They're not boxing anyone, but they're preparing themselves to box as if they are boxing.

Now, why does this thing work so well? Because our brains are goal seeking and achieving things. So, if you give your brain a goal that it has to accomplish, your brain is going to accomplish that thing. Now, I know some people still are probably like, well, I don't know, like that just sounds like a lot of hoopla. Well, there was actually a study done on it in at the University of Chicago. So I want to share that because I think it's so interesting.

So at the University of Chicago, they got a basically a random group of individuals that they had do free throws. So they first had them do free throws on day one. After day one, they had split them into three different groups. One group they said you are not practicing at all for the next 30 days. Another group they said you are practicing every single day shooting free throws for the next 30 days. The third group, they said, "You are only practicing visually. So, we're going to have you sit down, close your eyes, and imagine yourself shooting the ball into the net." After 30 days, the group that did not practice, they improved 0% as presumed. The group that did practice physically every single day improved 24%. The group that only practiced visually, I want you to think, just guess real quick, how many how much percent you think they improved by. 23 they improve by 23%. The people who practice physically improve by 24%. How is that even possible? That is possible because like I said your brain wants to achieve anything you give it to when you mentally rehearse yourself doing that thing and not just receiving the award and the accolade. You can do that as well, but literally before you go to the gym, visually rehearsing. Okay, I'mma pick up this weight. Okay, I'mma do this machine. Okay, I'm gonna pick it up like this. I'mma tuck in my stomach. I'mma do this. Your brain is going to do exactly what you want it to do. When I come home from work, I'm going to pack a couple orders and then I'm going to do this and I'm going do that. That is what your brain is set out to do. So many times you don't understand. You're so scared when it comes to doing things because you're like, "Oh my god, this is my first time doing it." Just because it's your first time physically doing something, it doesn't have to be your first time mentally doing something. Sometimes you end up fumbling and messing up because you never actually rehearse in your head. Well, what am I going to do when I get to this place in the space? We always say, well, I want to achieve this and I want to be here in life and I want to be there in life. Well, what does that actually look like for you? Mentally rehearse your days from the day time that you wake up from the time that you go to sleep. You want to be a 1% woman, right? You want to be a top 1% woman. What is your day actually going to look like? Too many people never get there because they never visualize the necessary steps to get there. And then they also never visualize what is it actually going to look like when they are there. So that's definitely one that I definitely recommend to do. Visual and mental rehearsals.

The next one is they invest in mental hygiene. Now I think this one is so important because I've come to learn this is why a lot of high achieving individuals are able to be quote unquote normal people even though many of us normal people don't look at them as that. And so what is hygiene? Right? Let's talk about it. Hygiene. When we when I say that word, if I say somebody has good hygiene, what do you think about? Oh, she must smell really good. Oh, she must bathe with something really nice. There's this physical aspect of it. Let's keep going with that. What happens if you do not maintain your hygiene? What happens if you don't wash your clothes? What happens if you don't brush your teeth? What happens if you don't wash your body? You're going to have yellow teeth. You're going to smell. You're going to start itching. Okay, let's stick with that. Now imagine if you had to go to work for two weeks without keeping up your hygiene. You could not wash your body. You couldn't change your clothes. You couldn't brush your teeth. Do you think you would be able to perform the task at work the same way you do as if you had taken a bath? No. There's nothing that changed about work. But you because you did not keep up your hygiene. You're probably itching and scratching. Your body feels you can't even pay attention. Then you smelling yourself. You can't even remember what somebody's saying because you every 3 seconds you like what's that smell? My oh my gosh that smells stink. Your breath stink to the point where you don't even want to talk. So what happens if we do not keep up with our physical hygiene that literally will affect our performance in the world.

Now I want to talk to you about mental hygiene because it's something that we don't talk about enough and this is something actually that has the same exact effect if we do not keep it up that having a lack of physical hygiene has but the problem is the physical one we can see we can smell we can you know use our five senses to detect the mental hygiene is something that's very personal to you but it does have the same negative effects it has the same negative effect as such as a lack of memory it has something a negative effect such is a lack of paying attention, the lack of acquiring skills, all these different things that a lack of physical essentially hygiene would have, a lack of mental hygiene will have. And so what is mental hygiene essentially? So to put it easily, mental hygiene is the practice and the habits that help support a good mental health. Now, I know some people are going to be like, "Okay, but like what does that really mean?" Basically, the things that you do that put you in a better mind state. I necessarily would say and if you think about it on a physical level, it's basically the same thing. What do you have to do to keep up your physical health as far as working out as far as the constant washing of your body, right? The the process of taking in things and pushing things out. If you have good hygiene, you can go to the gym, but then also you can smell good the next day. There's no correlation between the two. You're not going to stink because you have good hygiene. I want you to think about the same thing when it comes to your mental hygiene. And this is why I said this is why a lot of high achieving people can still be quote unquote normal people and a lot of people are confused why this is why people are confused when not too long ago um Michelle Obama so sorry couldn't believe I just forgot her name. Michelle Obama recently posted something or on her podcast she talked about how she watches the Real Housewives and people are like oh my gosh she watches the Real Housewives. There was a video that was uploaded about two weeks ago of Prince Harry and his wife and they were inside the labor delivery room with one of their children and they were dancing to that song. Drop it down low and everybody was like literally so perplexed because they're like what? Like they listen to this when they heard Michelle Obama watching the housewives. What? That's so like runchy and she watches this. How are they able to do this? because they keep good mental hygiene. The same way that somebody keeps good physical hygiene and they can go to the gym early in the morning but then later that night smell good. They do the same exact thing. They can input some of these things that are essentially not always high achieving and they're not always the best thing to watch for your brain. They can watch somebody's shows and essentially they still can perform higher because they can they know how to cleanse their self out. They're the ones that are not always on social media 247. When they want to go on social media, they can go on the shade room. They can't go on all these gossip sites and see what's going on. But then they keep that to a minimum. So they might do it 8020. 80% of the time I'm doing this, 20% of the time I'm doing that. They can watch the housewives. Some of them honestly probably watch baddies for all we know. Like these shows that people talk about and they're like, "Oh my god, these are horrible." A lot of these high achieving people watch these shows. You would be surprised how many high achieving people listen to Sexy Red. honestly and truly. But how are they able to do these quote unquote normal things? It is because they have practices that they do to wash these things out. So they do say, "Hey, I want to listen to a sexy red song. Okay, I'm listen to that song today, but for the next two days I'm listening to motivational podcast. For the next two days, I'm journaling." Or even that same night they journal. They practice things that are essentially going to help them exercise that mental capacity, essentially exercise that brain, have mental hygiene.

But I also want to talk to you about some of the effects of having bad mental hygiene. And a lot of times it leads, it comes from the phone. And I know we always hear this all the time, but I wanted to talk about this that was an article published and it has a few medical doctors that talked about them doing research on the effects of when it comes to your phone and mental hygiene. And I want to explain to you guys some of the negative effects of that. So I'm going to read a little bit of an excerpt from the National Library of Medicine. And this is talking about two do medical doctors findings on the effects of multitasking while being on different kinds of screens and just the overuse of your phone. Of found that heavy media multitaskers perform poorly on task switching ability tests indicating a lack of cognitive control. Furthermore, Unafir found that chronic multitaskers have inferior working memory performance and more difficulty filtering out irrelevant information leading to increased mental fatigue and stress.

So, I want you to understand this. By literally using all your phones all the time, by literally not doing things that are exercising your brain, this causes you to have more mental fatigue. What does that look like? This looks like you saying, "I really want to focus on that business. I really want to study when I get home from work." And then your brain literally feeling like it can't do it because you are experiencing mental fatigue. Your brain is so exhausted. You feel so stressed. Why? Because your brain isn't able to go through the process of having things happen to it and then filter it out. You're stressing about something that your boss said to you at 10:00 a.m. and that was 10 p.m. Why? Because you have low cognitive control. Why? Because you have higher increased stress rates. And this all comes from having low mental hygiene. And so that's why I tell people all the time, first and foremost, try to limit the amount of phones that you are using. Sorry, the amount of screens. Well, some people do be have multiple phones, but the amount of screens that you are using. This means that you need to start using your brain in other capacities. This means that you need to limit some of the negative inputs that you're putting inside of your brain. Like I said before, you don't have to be perfect, and I'm not one to judge because I did grow up watching fight videos on YouTube. I don't know if you guys remember that era or if that was just my era. But I used to be like Detroit fight videos, Miami fight video. I don't know. That was me. That was like in 2006, 2007. We're not judging anybody. All I'm saying is nobody's perfect, okay? It's okay to like what you like. Like I think some people feel like, "Oh, I can't listen to this kind of music. I can't." You can still do that. There's so many high achieving women. There's so many top percent women that literally watch the same stuff you watch, listen to the same stuff you listen to. But they find a balance with it. They do understand. I can't keep getting all these negative inputs. They do understand my brain is literally getting dirty. I'm dirtying up my brain with all this information. It needs to be washed out so it can properly function so I can have cognitive control over the things that I do. Some people can't even control their brain so I can have less mental fatigue. So if I need my brain to run from 10 a.m. to 10:00 p.m. non-stop, it can do that. That sounds crazy, but depending on the goals that you have, you might want to do that. But you can't do that when you're always using a whole bunch of screens. You can't do that when you're constantly only putting in negative information or you can't do that when you're putting in more negative information than essentially positive information. And so that's one that I definitely want to talk about, mental hygiene.

The next one is they lean into discomfort to expand their capacity. Now, this one was always interesting to me because it always felt like the people, the women that were doing so much had literally a different brain than me. I don't know if anybody else has ever felt like that, but it often felt like how were they able to do this? Like, how are they able to think about this and think about that and put it together and make it cohesive and make it one or how are they able to think of this business and that business? I used to watch stuff like Shark Tank and all this other stuff. And I'm seeing these people talk about starting businesses and all these things. And I'm like, that makes so much sense. Why did I not think about that? Like, their brain literally must be a different brain than mine. Their brain must be bigger than mine, smarter than mine. And essentially after doing some research, I found out that I actually was not necessarily wrong. And I actually found out there's actually a way to grow your brain through a process that is called neuroplasticity.

Now neuroplasticity refers to the brain's ability to modify, change, and basically adapt its structure to kind of whatever you want it to be essentially. I want a lot of people to understand that your brain is a goal seeking goal achieving thing. The problem that a lot of people don't realize is you do not give it anything to seek and you don't give it anything to achieve. So essentially it rusts. A lot of people think that their brain essentially stops growing after they turn 18, after they turn or like graduate high school, they turn 22, 23, 24, they graduate college and there's this feeling of my brain's not growing anymore. Because your brain experienced a lot of neuroplasticity when you are in your earlier years because it is constantly having to adapt to new things. Every single day you have a new quiz. Every single day you're learning something new in school from the time you wake up to the time that you go to sleep. And so there's this process of your brain constantly having to adapt, constantly having to grow. Well, a lot of times when we graduate school, we stop giving our brain things to grow. Our processes of literally life become mudame, right? You wake up the same time. You go to sleep the same time. You talk to the same people. You watch the same TV shows. And so that goal seeking, goal achieving brain of yours that you have literally starts to rust because it is not being used. It is not having to think of new things. You can go to work. You can perform tasks at work on autopilot. You don't even have to think about those things. You half the time get in a car to go to work and then all of a sudden it feel like you're just there. Why is that? Because you can do those things without thinking. And if you can do something without thinking, your brain essentially does not have to wire together new neurons to create neuroplasticity. And so the top percent women understand this and they use this process to become more efficient and essentially grow their brain.

Now, if you want to have neuroplasticity continuously go on for you, you have to do things I would recommend in small doses, in small batches that make you uncomfortable. You literally have to get out of your comfort zone because that is the only way your brain is going to force itself to grow. Your brain is a goal seeking, goal achieving machine. That is what your brain is. So, at first it's going to be uncomfortable. At first, you're not going to know what to do. And eventually your brain is going to adapt to this thing. And the top 1% women know this. So they constantly require theirelves to go into new experiences, to go into new rooms, to do things that are uncomfortable for them. Because I want you to understand today there's a lot of things that you can't do. And I know a lot of people say, "Don't say you can't. Don't say you can't." No. Literally, your brain can't do a lot of stuff today. Today, you probably can't make a New York Times bestseller book. But if you learn how to make your first paragraph and then you learn how to make your first chapter and then you learn how to make your first couple chapters and then you learn how to make your first book and then after that you learn how to make another book. Eventually you can become a New York New York Times bestseller because eventually your brain is going to start growing. It doesn't grow physically but neurons are going to start turning on where it's going to start piecing things together. And that's why I think there's a disconnect between high achieving individuals, individuals who don't consider themselves to be high achieving because we see these interviews of these people and they're trying to literally explain to us how they do what they do. But for them, it's so hard for them to explain it because their brain has literally grown to the point of this becoming normal for them. And so when they say stuff in interviews, it sounds I've always thought very like unre not unrealistic, but just like very fluffy. Like, oh, just do this and stay motivated and do this and do that. And it's not always because they're trying to hide their process. It's not always because they're trying to seem fluffy. It's because their brain has grown to the point where this has become so normal for them. They can't imagine not being able to do this thing. They know it was a point when they couldn't, but they don't even understand the process is neuroplasticity. Their brain is putting things together, so many things together that they could just come up with anything. And I think I've definitely experienced that when it comes to my content. I use a lot of analogies, as you guys may know, and I just put things together. And people often ask me, "How do you do that?" Like, "How do you put things together? How do you" And for a while, I tried to like explain it, but then I realized I'm just talking. I'm not really explaining it well. And then I had to realize it's because I'm constantly putting my brain in uncomfortable situations. I'm constantly researching new data. I'm constantly finding out new things. And so my brain remembers this little quote from there, this little piece from there, that little thing from there. And then when it's time for me to speak, I'm able to speak clearly because my brain is using all the different parts of it that I've caused it to grow.

And so that's what I want to talk to you about as far as this part of it. A lot of 1% women do a process of leaning into the uncomfort, leaning into uncomfortable things to constantly grow their brain and grow their capacity. So when it becomes a huge thing that they have to do, they're able to do it so well and they're able to it literally feels like everything they touch is turn to gold and everything they do is amazing and they can't do any wrong. And it's like no, they can't do any wrong. Yes, you're right. Everything does touch the gold because they have all these wires in their brain that are lit up that allows them to achieve things at such a larger rate that you would not be able to achieve because you don't have neuroplasticity. Your brain is literally rusted. It has not been used in so long. And so when you try to do these big things, your brain literally feels like it can't do it. Your brain feels tired. You feel defeated. And a lot of this is because your brain is kind of like, we don't really exercise this thing. We don't really use this thing. and now he's trying to do this big thing. And it's like, girl, girl, this our first time at the gym. Let's start with the 5 lb weight instead of trying to do the 55 lb weight. Okay.

The next one is they prioritize deep work and focus. I've realized the misconception about a lot of high achieving women is this thing that they're always busy. And they're actually not always busy. They're usually always focused. I think a lot of people confuse this focus with like, oh my gosh, they do so many things at once. And it's actually they do a process called deep work which leads to a process called flow which not only allows them to do more but allows them to do it faster and essentially be able to achieve more in one hour than a quote unquote normal person or person who's not in a state of flow can achieve and or retain and learn within 3 to four hours. So first let's talk about deep work and the process of it. Um, I'm going to explain it briefly, but I definitely recommend if you're interested in learning more about it to get the book Deep Work by Cal Newport. He has an entire book about it. I read it. I definitely enjoy it.

So, first and foremost, they do something called deep work. Deep work is essentially when you mentally put your brain into this area of focus. And I would say you put your brain and your body into it. So, deep work is when you say, "Okay, every day at 700 a.m. I'm going to go to the kitchen table. I'm going to put on jazz music. I'm gonna have a cup of water. I'm gonna have a pen. I'm gonna have a piece of paper. And I'm going to work on blank." That is getting your body ready and having you do deep focus. You are creating an environment for yourself. Essentially, you're creating a cue for yourself so your brain knows at this time this is when we turn on this is when we do this. It's very similar to how it's hard to really be productive in your bed. Like I I've tried it before to create content in my bed as far as like organizing stuff and researching stuff and I always fall asleep and I used to always feel like why am I always falling asleep? Why am I always tired? Because my brain has learned over the years my bed is a cue for sleep. And so you need to create an environment for yourself first and foremost so your body understands we are getting into deep work and your brain can understand that we are getting into deep work. And I'm not going to go to it too too too much. Like I said, I definitely recommend to read the book, but that's like the first process of starting it. And then once you understand deep work and you start getting into that, that is how your brain gets into a flow state. So you might have heard of flow state before. And at first there was some like conjunction about it like is it real? Is it not real? But it's actually been proven by neuroscientists. So I'm going to explain it to you a little bit further.

So the flow state is a state of deep immersion and focus that has been linked to enhanced performance and well-being. Now neuroscience research suggests that it's doing this by activating different parts of the brain. So essentially when you are in the flow state you are able to perform better as far as mentally and you are actually able to get a lot more happiness out of life and what you are doing. So let me talk about some of the benefits of being in a flow state. So, I talked about how they said it does improve performance in various activities. And they've said it's done things such as improve your skill acquisition. So, basically allow you to be able to obtain skills faster. And it also has been linked to helping with your productivity. So, essentially, when you are in a flow state, you're able to be more productive than if you're not in the flow state. And this is because they've literally done EEGs on it. So they put like these things on people's brains to be able to figure out what pieces of the brain that the flow state turns on. It turns on certain pieces of the brain as far as activity and it turns off certain ones. And one of the ones that it turns off is essentially to make it as simple as possible the distraction part of your brain. So when you are in a flow state, you are not worried about anything. And this is why individuals who have been in a flow state have stated that they're able to work for hours on end and it feels like they've only been working for 45 minutes or hour because while they are in this state they are so productive they are focused on this thing that their brain is not even worried about doing anything else. Flow has also been linked to increasing happiness helping with burnout and also helping with the sense of depression. Now I've come to the understanding this is probably because when you are focusing on this thing when you're in a flow state you are not worried about anything else. So there is this sense of happiness that you are getting while you're doing this thing. And then oftent times the burnout and the depression comes when you're trying to juggle so many different things or possibly when you are worried about doing so many different things. I don't want to get into it too much to make it too scientific, but essentially learning how to turn on and off the flow state is such an amazing skill to have and the top 1% women have it because if you think about it, it is like a superpower. Yes, I did explain it has been scientifically proven from neuroscience. It is something that is true. But if you think about it, that literally sounds like a superpower. I can say I want to focus on this thing. I can focus on this thing at hours at end. Not only am I focusing on this thing at hours and I'm going to get an improved performance doing this thing. So imagine if I consistently do this thing and I get this jump and I get this jump and I get this jump. Individuals who cannot get into a flow state. The other 99% of individuals are going to try to do the same thing and they're always going to feel behind me because they cannot activate that flow state. So they can do the same amount of things for the same amount of hours and I can get 90% ahead of it doing something and they can only get 20 more percent ahead at doing something. And that is something I've learned that a lot of high achieving women know how to do essentially do this thing of turn on and turn off this flow state and they do it through deep work. Like I said before, I definitely recommend to check out that book deep work by Cal Newport. Also, you can watch different videos about the flow state. If you guys would like, I actually can create an entire video about that. Comment that below. Um, if that's what something that you guys would like to see, but that's definitely something that helps a lot of women get a lot farther and it literally is like a superpower.

The next one is they invest in ROI skills. So, ROI stands for return on investment. They invest in skills that essentially are going to help them achieve more. This is one thing that I think a lot of people don't do. Once you leave high school, once you leave college, there's this thing of you not spending money or honestly time much as far as investing in more skills. And women who are top 1% women are constantly investing in new skills. And these skills can be something really, really grand or really really new such as AI or whatever, some course, or it literally can be them going to a speaking class and learning how to speak better. They're better with their communication. I've seen some women talk about going to class talking about literally how to pose eloquently because they're like, "I always have to take pictures for my job or I always have to take pictures, so let me learn how to pose." I've seen women go to classes learning how to walk better in heels, how to walk more eloquently, how to stand up with a better posture. They spend money on things that are going to give them return on their investment because they understand their value as a woman and they understand every component of me. I want to be high value. I don't just want to make a lot of money and be a pretty face. I want to be able to speak eloquently. I want to be able to walk eloquently. I want to be able to be, you know, vast in knowledge about a particular topic. And so so many people I think become stagnant in life because you get a job and just because you've been working at that job for five years or 10 years, they feel like all I need to do is what's at this job and they don't realize there's so many people that have been working there a fraction of the time that you've been working there that can bump ahead of you because they return on their investment skills. They pay for skills that are going to make them better than you faster than you. And so I think a lot of women need to think about that and ask themselves, when is the last time you invested in your ROI? When is the last time you invested in something that's going to make you a better woman and essentially help you get a return on your investment? Because it's not like they do these things just to

Say they do these things. They do these things because they understand if I can speak better, I can negotiate better. If I can negotiate better, I can have a job where I make more money. If I can essentially walk better on heels, I can hold my head higher. I can have better structure. They understand that doing these things will lead me to be perceived in a different light. This will allow me into different doors. This will allow me to speak to different people.

And so that's another thing I want a lot of women to ask themselves and start getting into the process of doing. I know some, a lot of people are scared now. Oh, everybody's selling a course and everybody's and so there's this fear of like, I don't want to waste money. I don't want to waste money. But I think a lot of people don't understand you're wasting that money right now not doing nothing with it. Money today is not going to be worth $5 in two years. It's probably gonna be worth $4.50, if not less than that. As time goes on, this money is going to start deteriorating. Literally, it's going to start losing value. Literally, you need to start investing in yourself.

High value women are constantly doing things to invest in themselves. And not necessarily always money, it's time as well. They're reading the books. They're listening to the podcasts, but they're doing it on a consistent basis so that they are consistently getting a return on their time and getting a return on their money with things that are going to boost them up and make them higher value.

Now, the final one in my opinion is one of the most important ones because a lot of you came to this video, you want to be a high value woman. You want to be a 1% woman, but a lot of people, the undertone behind that is you want to be rich. And one thing I've learned from a lot of high value women is first and foremost, they understand their definition of being rich. I want you to understand having money is having a tool. Money is a tool. Money, when people say money does not bring happiness, it is because it literally does not bring happiness. Money does not smile. Money does not hug you, and money does not love you. It is what you use money on that is essentially supposed to bring you happiness. Because if I could tell you right now, I could give you a million dollars, but if I tell you, but you got to keep it in a closet and you can't touch it, are you gonna want that million dollars? No. Because what's the point of having it if I can't use it?

The problem that a lot of people don't understand is you never thought about your definition of rich. So, you never thought about how to actually use this tool. Everybody says they want the tool. I want money. I want more money. And you don't even know what you would do with it. And this is why the vast majority, over 65% of individuals who win the lottery go broke within a few years. These people who win millions of dollars, and I'm sure they said it, that's the whole point of entering the lottery because they probably needed money. How do they go broke so fast? Because they never found out, first and foremost, what is their definition of rich?

And I actually learned this concept in a book called "I Will Teach You to Be Rich" by the author Ramit Sethi. I definitely recommend to read that book. And he actually made me question for the first time in my life, what is my definition of rich? Because I think before that, I had one very similar to everyone else. My definition of rich is being able to work whenever I want, wherever I want, being able to have designer clothes, being able to go on vacation definitely whenever I want, being able to have a nice car, live in a nice place in a nice neighborhood. Like that is my definition of rich. And I had to learn a lot of times our definition of rich comes from social media. It comes from us seeing all these things and all these people doing all these things, and so we convince ourselves it's an all or nothing. I have to have the bags. I have to have the clothes. I have to have the apartment because that is the definition of rich.

And a lot of people don't understand, first and foremost, you waste a lot of money on these things because you truly didn't want these things. You wanted these things because somebody else had them, or you wanted these things because of the image that they, you feel like it would give you. But then at the same time, you feel so burnt out in life. You feel so tired, exhausted in life because you don't have that thing that truly makes life rich. Because when it comes to how to be rich and what high value women, 1% women knowing their definition of rich, it is from money, don't get me wrong, but it's also how they are using that money, how they're using that tool. And as long as you have any money, you can learn how to be rich. You just have to learn your definition of it.

See, for some people, to be rich is being able to go on vacation every two months. I don't really care where I live. As long as I live in a pretty decent neighborhood, pretty decent place. It don't got to be a house. It could be an apartment. I don't care what kind of car I drive. As long as my car gets me from A to B. I ain't got to worry about it too much. I'm not really worried about all this other stuff. I'm worried about the thing that brings me happiness. The thing that brings me joy is going on vacation. And as long as I can do that every two months, every three months, I'm rich.

There are some other people that's like, you know what, I live in New York. I don't even need a car. I ain't worried about a car. I can live in, you know, a pretty decent neighborhood. But one thing about me, every single weekend, I have to be able to go to a nice restaurant and I have to not be able to worry about the bill. That's their definition of rich. And as long as they can do that, they're rich.

Now, disclaimer, I don't want people to think that I'm saying, "Oh, well, you know, you you shouldn't worry about having nice things and don't." At the end of the day, if those are the things that you want to have, those are the things that you want to have. But you have to understand what makes you rich. Meaning if those things were all to be, if all the money was to be taken away and you could only spend money on one thing, what is that one thing that will make you happy? See, so many people, if everything was taken away from them, they would think they can't be happy at all. But I can't have the designer bags anymore. But I can't have the nice apartment. But I can't. Because you don't know your definition of being rich. And like I said, social media has distorted it. And for you not even to understand that money is supposed to be a tool.

And I know a lot of people say money isn't everything. And money, don't get me wrong, you do need money to have a certain level of comfortability. I'm not taking that away. But I can honestly say from prior experience, I was a six-figure business owner for a few years. I was 21, 22, 23, making all of this money. And I can honestly say it was one of the saddest, depressing points of my life. But I was doing all the things that I said would make me happy, right? I was going on vacation for almost a month long. I was working literally from anywhere. I was picking up and going whenever I wanted to and doing all these things. And the problem is I was doing all the things that social media taught me would make me rich, that TV taught me would make me rich. And inside I was not happy because I still did not find that thing that brought me happiness.

And so a lot of high value women, they're constantly doing stuff. They're constantly on. They're constantly. But you know what keeps them from not being burnt out? Because they find that thing that makes them feel rich and here in their heart. And they make sure they do that thing consistently. No matter what's going on, I got to go on a vacation every three months. No matter what's going on, I got to go to a restaurant. No matter what's going on, they continuously do these things. So when they're pouring outside of themselves, because that's just what you have to do in life, they're constantly getting poured back into them.

And so I want you to think about that. If I was to tell you, you have two minutes and I can give you something that would cost high value money but unlimitedly, what would that thing be for the rest of your life? A lot of people wouldn't even know. Oh, they like, "Oh my gosh, should I do? Should I do shoes? Oh my gosh, should I do clothes? Oh my gosh." Until you can figure that thing out and be so on top of that thing that you wouldn't say after, maybe I should have chose this. Maybe I should have chose that. You don't know your definition of rich. So even if you do get to that point of being rich monetarily and having the money for it, you're going to waste it. And that's why we see the Bill Gates and the Mark Zuckerbergs. Every time you see them, they're wearing some khakis and a t-shirt because that's their not their definition of rich. They don't care about clothes. I'm sure they got yachts and boats and all these jets because they like, I want to pick up and go whenever I want to go. That's my definition of rich. And so I realize I say that to say, a lot of 1% women know their definition of being rich.

Now, thank you guys so much for watching my video. Of course, don't forget to like, comment, and subscribe. If you like this video, but you want the audio versions of it, definitely subscribe to my podcast, which I'll have linked below. Um, I come out with a new episode every Tuesday. Definitely don't forget to sign up for my newsletter. Follow me below on any other social media platforms, which is really just TikTok. And of course, I said I'm going to start doing an advice column. Please comment below what times you'll have you want me to do it. So, I chose to do it after 6:00 p.m. Eastern time, Monday through Thursday. So, what time would you guys like me to do it? And yeah, we can do that. So, thank you guys so much and have a great one. And also go below for the advice column. Send any specific advice that you guys want and I will start doing lives every week or every other week to answer your guys' questions, concerns, anything you're going through specifically for you. So, thank you so much and have a great one. And thank you so much because I'm almost at 100,000 followers. Thank you.