Transcription
Good day all. Welcome back to the channel. Got another Courtney Ryan special. Six unexpected turnons men always miss.
For those of you who want to watch the video uninterrupted, the link is in the video description. For the rest of you, let's do it.
Hi everyone, welcome back to my channel. I'm Courtney Ryan and there's a big difference between what women say they find attractive and what actually captures their attention in real life. Sometimes it's the smallest, most ordinary behaviors that actually have the biggest impact. Things that signal confidence, awareness, or emotional depth without you ever having to say a word. Most guys don't realize they're doing these things or they overlook how powerful they are. So, in this video, I'm going to be breaking down the unexpected turnons that make a man stand out in subtle, unforgettable ways.
The first thing that I'm going to talk about is being calm under pressure. One of the most magnetic qualities that a man can have is composure. Especially when life doesn't go according to plan, the way you handle.
Yeah, that's it. And also, if if a woman's a cause of those problems and creating you immense stress, guys, just buck up. Uh suck it up. Do not uh retaliate in any way. Do not raise your voice. Do not show any emotion. That's all the contemporary advice that's given out there by these particular channels and other men's channels, too. They'll say that. I just put up with it. Be stoic. Be uh be a rock who cannot be moved. You know what I say to that? [clears throat] People start doing these things in your life that are causing you extreme stress uh and pressure. Get rid of them. Life's too short to put up with it.
Now, let's talk about the life of just about every single man out there. The life of every single man out there is one of pressure and stress every single day. Unless you've come from uh family money or you've got some support, some sort of support network financially, every single dude out there is fighting with the world every single day. He's fighting for the future. Uh he is trying to maintain a roof over a family's head or his own head. He's trying to save up for a for a home. He's trying to manage living expenses. He's trying to keep a job. He's doing jobs he doesn't want to do. working incredibly hard to get money to keep his family and girlfriend or wife happy. That's the life of a man. But guys, you can't show any weakness at all. No, no, no. Not allowed.
Pressure, conflict, or even mild inconvenience says more about your character than almost anything else. When plans change, if someone disrespects you, or something unexpected happens that wasn't a part of your plan, your reaction becomes a reflection of your inner stability. I would say most people let small frustrations chip away at their patience. They sigh really loudly. They snap back or they let irritation completely take over. But the men who are able to just stay composed turn on a calm.
It's a turn on. Just cop heaps of [ __ ] uh say nothing about it. Don't hold anyone accountable because that's definitely not eternal and let it bounce off you. It's like water off a duck's back dealing with women's [ __ ] I don't know. That's that's that's what you have to deal with. But for me, that's the advice. It isn't, hey women, how about don't don't get guys to the point where you're putting them under pressure and uh making them potentially snap at you by being combative, raising issues and creating issues out of thin air when he's already under pressure with the rest of his life. How about that? How about being an adult reading the room saying, "Hey, this dude, he's working pretty hard. He's he's he's pretty tightly wired. He's pretty tightly strung. He's doing everything for me and and for the family. Let's let's, you know, let's let's let's leave him alone. Let's try and support him. Let's try and be nice to him so he feels uh at ease when he's at home, not coming home, walking in the front door and coping [ __ ] winging, carrying on, crying. Guys, anyone who's lived with a woman, they'll tell you that they are grown-up children a lot of the time. Not all of them, but many of them are absolute barker cases behind closed doors. So, you're coming in and you're a counselor, therapist, uh, all of the above wrapped into one while also dealing with your own [ __ ] So, you could have had some really bad thing happen and you're going to be hearing complaining and winging about work, uh, someone nitpicking you, nagging you, and you could have lost a job. Uh, you could have maybe lost some money on an investment. Something hasn't gone your way. Maybe uh someone close to you has passed away or is sick or ill, whatever it might be. They're got to stop uh picking at you.
Steady energy communicates confidence without a word. It tells people, especially women in this case, that you're not easily shaken, that you have emotional control, and that being around you feels safe and reassuring, which is one of the most powerful feelings that you can make a woman feel. That is a deeply attractive dynamic because it allows others to relax in your presence instead of sort of mirroring your stress. If this isn't your natural default, it's something that you can absolutely build and work on.
If you're listening to this, coming from Courtney Ryan, cuz she knows what it's like to be super stressed, super highrung uh and be cool and calm under those uh intense conditions, does she? you know, she's married a millionaire or something and um you know, she's obviously done very well on her grind here on YouTube, but you know, swimming in cash. Yeah, guys, but you guys out there who are doing it hard, either you can't get dates, women don't like you, women won't look at you, or they're rude to you, guys. You know what? Just you'll be right. Just become a bit more stoic. Uh and make that your new baseline. Yeah, no worries. I don't I don't know how guys can watch this and actually get any value out of it apart from laughing.
Just thinking oh well I do those things that is okay you can work on it I promise try to slow your response time when you feel that your patience is being tested a little bit I want you to take one deep breath before you speak and something helpful you can do is even ask yourself whether this moment will still matter tomorrow or even an hour from now most things probably won't now this doesn't mean suppressing your emotions that's not what I'm trying to say it just means mastering it. Over time, that balance between strength and calm is going to become a part of who you are. And that quiet confidence tends to really draw people in without you ever having to raise your voice. The way that you respond and react absolutely matter. And yes, it can either be a turn on or a turnoff to women.
Number two.
All right, and this is something that's talked about quite a bit, but I like to bring this point up. Uh you could be having a really tough time. You might be pensive. you know, you're sitting at home, you're on the couch, uh you're sitting next to your girlfriend, wife, whatever, and you were just you got the pressure, you got the weight of the world on you, you know, you might be burnt out from work or what other pressures in your life, and you're just sitting there quiet. You may be looking at the window or staring at the wall just thinking, you know, you know, you're not really present. And then she's going to nag you. Oh, what's wrong? You're like, nah, nothing. You know, all good, all good. Just a busy day at work. Oh, no. Tell me, tell me, tell me. you know, then this is going to go on and eventually you're going to tell them and you're going to watch their eyes glaze over. It is not going to be the response that you want. So, there's no point even talking about it. And she isn't wrong in saying that women get turned off by men who don't seem like they're in control. They'll ask you, they'll pick at you to try and get your innermost insecurities or issues or stresses out. They want you to tell them. It's a challenge. You tell them, they don't want to [ __ ] hear it. Oh, that'll be okay. That's all. Forget about it.
Two, subtle physical restraint. There is something incredibly attractive about a man who is in control of himself. Not just physically, but emotionally, too. You can feel it in the way he moves, the way he speaks, and the way he reacts. Like I mentioned in point one, he's not impulsive, and he doesn't rush. Instead, everything he does just feels really intentional.
Everything he's James Bond, right? He's intentional. He's calm. You know, bullets can be flying past his head. He could be, you know, driving the Aston Martin around [clears throat] the cliffside in Italy with these Spectre agents chasing him, you know, and he's not even breaking a sweat. He doesn't even look like he's bothered by, you know, helicopters firing at him, everything. You, you guys, you got to be like James Bond. That's attractive. That's a real turn on. [laughter] fantasy land stuff.
Kind of restraint, whether it's the way he touches, the way he looks at someone, or even how he chooses his words, carries a quiet power. Now, I'm not saying to be cold or distant, just more so able to keep your composure. When a man slows down instead of chasing instant gratification, it creates this tension that feels magnetic. Women pick up on that instantly. It signals that you're not desperate for attention or approval. You are comfortable leading the pace, and you're aware of the moment that you're in. It's sort of a subtle way of saying, "I don't need to rush this because I know what I bring to the equation." That kind of energy will naturally draw people in. It makes interactions feel more meaningful, and it builds anticipation, whether that's emotional or physical. It shows emotional intelligence, self-discipline, and maturity, all of which we know are deeply attractive. And I want to reiterate, this restraint doesn't just apply to physical touch. It can show up in how you listen, how you hold eye contact, or how you handle conflict. I think when a man can stay grounded and composed, especially in those situations that might fluster other people, it creates a kind of quiet dominance that is far more powerful than trying to impress someone. And speaking of self-control and attention to detail, those same qualities apply to how you take care of.
That was good. That was smooth. All right, guys. Buy some Tee Hanley.
Ambition, a passion project, a hobby that you enjoy, a personal development. I think a man who is working towards something just feels alive and engaged with life. That energy is such a turnon because it shows that he's capable of commitment. He's capable of discipline and long-term thinking, which.
And he's capable of making her life better. Women love that. They love going for the man who's ambitious, but not with nothing. You've already got to have some sort of result and showing some sort of fruits of your labor. Women don't go in the mud for the most part. If you got one who does, that's awesome. Hang on to it. Most of them will not hang around with you when you are down and out. You've got to be already winning and they want to be and jump on board when you continue winning more. That's it. When you stop winning, see what happens. They won't be your biggest fan or cheerleader. Then if hard times come, because you can't always go up in a straight line. You can be winning, then things go down and things come up. That's the es and flows uh of life. So hang on. So let's recap. Let's recap. So you got to be you can't you're an immovable emotional rock. You are stoic. You don't react to anything. Any no pressure gets you down. And also now you are taking over the world. You're super ambitious. You are unstoppable. You are successful. Okay, cool. So there go like 99% of dudes probably. [laughter]
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Qualities that go far beyond just that surface level attraction. A man who has direction also just comes across as more trustworthy and reliable. There's a sense that he's not just drifting aimlessly, waiting for life to happen to him or chasing external validation. Instead, he is intentional about how he spends his time and his energy, which is incredibly appealing. If you're someone who's watching who is still figuring things out, you might feel a little bit lost right now. I think the key is just to start small and then build momentum. Pick a skill or a project to improve. Set achievable weekly goals and then stick to them. Over time, these consistent efforts compound into noticeable growth and that confidence becomes visible to other people. And you'll also feel it too. Keep the promises that you make to yourself. This is how you build true real confidence through that self-discipline and keeping the promises that you make to yourself. Even very simple habits like waking up on time, dedicating yourself to a workout or finishing a project that you started. Communicate focus and purpose. Women might not.
That's it, guys. And as I say, um, discipline, all right, discipline is much more maintainable than motivation. Motivation will keep you going in the short term. You get the eye of the tiger. Let's talk about going to the gym, right? You'll go and you'll buy Arnold Schwarzenegger's uh bodybuilding encyclopedia, that big 300 thick phone book page. You know, you'll buy that, you'll be pumped. You'll go down to local gym. You do a workout for six hours. You're going to do everything in there. You're going to do seven. You're going to do Arnold Schwarzenegger's 1974 uh Mr. Olympia preparation plan. You're like, "Okay, well, if he does that, I can do that and I want to look like Arie." And then you wake up the next day, you can't even move. You can't even bend your arms or extend them. you can't stand up cuz you destroyed your your quads on the squat rack. [laughter] [gasps] But that's what I'm saying. Good old discipline. It's doing things day in day out sometimes when you don't feel like it. Being persistent, it does actually pay off dividends eventually. So, that's my little bit of selfm motivation and uh motivational content for you today. [laughter] But it does persistence pays off. She does have a point there. You can't argue with that.
Consciously think about it, but they sense that stability and direction and it will draw them in.
I'm going to stop again, right? I'm going to stop because we're not we're not here about watching Courtney Ryan. Why women like persistence and why they like men who um are persevering is because they know they're going to get a result at the end of the day. Like they feel safe, they feel secure. If [ __ ] hits the fan, they know you're going to be able to deal with it, right? If things happen from a financial perspective, they'll know you go out and probably get another job to get the money to be able to pay for things. Nothing's going to fall um on them. They feel safe and secure. That's why they love it. But but but more so to the point that I was making earlier about they want they want winners. It's in their nature. It's just the way it is. You don't get upset about it. Women generally a lot of the time they don't want to be there when you when you're coming up from the mud and uh stand with you and crawl through the [ __ ] They're going to want you when you're done. You're a P package deal. That's why you get these women 35 plus on dating apps looking for Mr. Right. They're on there. You you'll be talking to them for five minutes even less. You've had a couple of messages going back and forth. They already start asking where do you work, what do you do, how long you've been there, what did you study, where do you live, do you rent, do you buy, did you rent or did you buy? Like they're going to ask you all these blatant questions to try and understand where you sort of stand on that social hierarchy and from a financial safety perspective. I [ __ ] you not. Put in the comments if that's what you experience. I I dare say I'm going to get a lot of comments confirming that. Put F in the comments if it's easier. It is a turnon from a woman's perspective. I think ultimately self-directed focus isn't just attractive because it signals that someone's going to be successful or success in general. I think it's attractive because it signals life. A man with direction is a man who knows where he's going. And there's an irresistible confidence in that certainty, even if he's still on the journey or just starting. It's going to make her more likely to want to be a part of it, too.
Number four, small intentional movements. Now, your body language communicates far more [laughter] than your words. Often before you even open.
How's the stuff they come out with? So, you need to micromanage just even now how you're moving, the body language you're giving off. Can Can you make this stuff up? Like, how can you take this seriously? So, you need to be a Okay, let's recap again. Super successful, stoic uh guy who doesn't crack and crumble under pressure. And now you're also very measured in every little thing you do and how what what energy you give off to the world. Awesome. Isn't this fun? This is all the things we got to do to maybe get what a woman to be attracted to you for a longer period of time or even for a shorter period of time. As we all know, guys, majority of them are going to blow up in your face. It's just the truth of the matter. I've been getting a lot of emails actually uh from people who might be new to the channel, like a lot of hate from dudes lately. It's like every day. Keep them coming, boys. Keep them coming. I just speaking the truth. Open your mouth.
How you walk into a room, the way that you sit, how you adjust your jacket, or even the way that you pour a drink. Every small action sends a signal about who you are and the energy that you carry, whether you realize it or not. And I also have to mention this because it's relevant here. A man's hands are incredibly appealing. Whether it's how you hold a steering wheel, a gesture while talking, or gently resting your hand on a table, women notice. Hands can be.
You got to be joking. I've never heard of that ever. Women in the comments, I know there are a few of you that watch. Think about 10% of my audience is female. Do you look at hands? All right, she's just making stuff up now. She's sitting down writing an AI, getting an AI to pump the script out.
Confidence, strength, and care sometimes in ways that words cannot. Honestly, I probably could have made an entire point just about hands. They are that much of an unexpected turnon. Not just for me, okay? I'm not a weirdo, but for a lot of women. If you've been around for a while, I am sure you've heard me talk about this in other videos. Um, back to my point, I got a little distracted here. I think deliberate controlled movements getting a bit fired up over the hands. Hey, look out, husband. Look out. She's reminiscing.
Calm, grounded energy. Not being stiff or overly serious, but just showing that you are comfortable in your own skin. Even subtle adjustments, slowing down slightly when you gesture, taking a measured step, or holding a pause before sitting, can shift how others perceive you. It signals that you are in control, you're composed, and you're thoughtful. Those little cues are incredibly effective because they're so understated. Most men don't pay attention to them, which makes them a true, pretty unexpected turnon. Over time, these small, intentional behaviors compound. They give off an aura of quiet confidence, calm dominance, and presence. All qualities that women respond to instinctively, even if they can't quite explain why.
And we have unexpected intelligence. Intelligence isn't about showing off or correcting other people. It is subtle, understated, and surprisingly magnetic. You don't want to be the guy who makes people feel stupid. That is not a turnon at all. In fact, it's quite the opposite. But what really draws people in is curiosity, thoughtfulness, and the ability to just listen and engage with people in a meaningful way. A man who.
Does that make you really intelligent? I would dare say uh the curse for the intelligent man is understanding what this whole dating market is about, what women are looking for. Have you listened to anything that she said here? And I think any of this makes sense. That's why I like watching Courtney's videos. I guess she makes good content in terms of how she puts it together. Like she's able to spit out videos every day. Good on her. I got to give her that. Like she's on the hustle, man. She's on the grind getting this stuff out there. But when you step back, you think about what she's actually put into this advice. Like what what are you getting out of it? Like be perfect. Be perfect. So So we've got um be stoic. uh do not, you know, crack under pressure at all. Don't react to anything. All right? Be a robot. Be super successful. Now, it's be super intelligent uh as well. But I think the curse of this is something a bit different. I'm going off topic here slightly. I'm going to go on a bit of a rant, but the curse of intelligence is you see life for what it is. You're able to put two and two together either through experience or through the experience of others. And so women don't like intelligent men because intelligent men will question them and will be logical and rational and keep them accountable. They don't like that. They like men who go along with the flow walking around in the world with their head in the sand. Uh who will go along with everything that she is saying, right? Jump through all the seven 17 hoops to maybe get some dates and some girls to like you. So it's basically be super Chad. That's what that's what all her videos are. That's why sometimes I put that on her on the uh the thumbnails because the video is just just be a Chad, right? Just be a super Chad. Not even Chad. Super Chad. Super James Bond Chad Frankenstein of every dude out there who is got all these traits. So they want they want guys who are successful, but they're not street smart. And that's why a lot of women, especially, you know, I'm going to say in their 30s and beyond, they sucker in guys who are smart at life. Uh they they know how to get ahead in life. They study, they start businesses, whatever it may be, become professionals, become, you know, good trades tradesmen, but they don't know anything about women. They haven't had much experience or much success. Maybe their success has been bad. Uh sorry, their experiences have been bad. And so finally one comes along. So say like a Courtney Ryan type comes along off a dating app. Bumble Tinder Hinge. She sees you as a target. These guys think they've won. These guys think they've won. Don't get me started. Right. I'm not getting myself started. You got these shows like The Bachelor, The Golden Bachelor. That was one that was recently on TV here in Australia. And it was some dude. He was like 62 year old guy. I'm not sure if he's an Australian guy or not. I think he was. I just saw it in the news. I didn't actually watch the show. The Golden Bachelor. He's a 62 year old like super Chad guy. All right. Super fit. Looks really good for his age. Very successful. Of course, you got all these women hunting him, chasing him. That's what society uh that's what society expects. That's what society promotes. And so, you got all these women chasing guys like that. And then they realize he's not that. and then they end up getting uh the relationships break up. Anyway, go and look at the go and look at any of those reality TV shows. Farmer Wants a Wife, we have in Australia here, uh Married at First Sight, you know, the list goes on. all those similar things, you know, relationships in those shows like Big Brother and that once the excitement's gone, once it's off the big screen, once once people could be normal human beings and these women realize that they're not Mr. Magic Man who can take them on a date in a helicopter and pick him up in an Aston Martin, take him on a yacht, you know, all this sort of stuff. That's what they end up busting up once that fantasy wears off. But I just like to liken that in, I guess, into real life. I know you're thinking, "Oh, what are you talking about? The Bachelor and shit." But you watch that show, if you got your eyes open to lie, it's the biggest load of rubbish. It's just a bunch of women hunting down trying to speedrun um a commitment out of some guy who's dumb enough to go on the show, thinking that he's winning, not realizing that he's the prey. You got these women, you see how competitive and that they get with each other. It is even about him. They just want the guy. So, what I'm trying to say is in real life, the example of this might not be the bachelor, right? You get a guy, you got women um trying to get on with this dude really quick, you know, talking about getting married and [ __ ] like that after three and six months and guys are doing it. Women like those guys. I love it. Anyway, what do you guys think about that rant? Was it just as bad as a Courtney Ryan rant, or did you make sense of it?
Who can explain things clearly, ask insightful questions, and connect ideas naturally comes across as captivating. It signals that he is thoughtful, present, and comfortable navigating the world without needing to dominate every single conversation. You don't have to be the most books smart guy in the room. I think what really matters is showing a genuine interest in the world and the people around you. This kind of intelligence creates depth that women notice instinctively. A man who combines curiosity with calm composure and presence becomes someone that other people want to be around. So how you can practice this is read, explore, and stay curious. When you talk to people, focus on asking thoughtful questions, listening to them actively, and contributing meaningfully rather than just trying to impress them or get a word in. To be interesting, one must first be interested, as I always say.
And lastly, reading the room. Social awareness is one of the most underrated turnons. Being attuned to the environment, noticing subtle energy shifts, and understanding unspoken cues communicates emotional intelligence, maturity, and presence. A man who.
Pairs a [ __ ] Like, listen to how these women talk about uh I know she's just talking absolute smack, right? she's making up content. But, you know, let's just let's just play devil's advocate here that uh this is what women really do find attractive. These women who be asking for these things or looking for these things, they they aren't they they aren't the female equivalent of this guy, this super dude? Uh so, how can they in their right mind ask for it? And the the answer is they're not in their right mind. And that's why you see so many of these women complaining. no good men and they can't find a good man to settle down and blah blah blah or guys are crap and this that and the other. There's no, you know, there's no emotionally available men out there. There's no uh economically uh viable men out there. whatever whatever you know whatever statement they have men are Peter Pans or the commitment phobes because the men that they're looking for who are all of these things or are somewhat make up that stereotype or archetype he isn't he isn't settling down he isn't settling down he's been around the block he's had a lot of women he knows what he's going to get so he keeps them on the roller coaster he keeps them on the ups and downs keeps them excited And eventually they get off the ride and then he gets up he gets more of them and it keeps going. That's what I don't understand. They can't get guys like this. [laughter] Yeah. I can just picture guys watching this, you know, one of her 875,000 subscribers will be there writing down on a piece of paper what to do and to be stoic and he's going to uh be unmoved. And so what is it? It's basically don't be human. Be Superman. Be Superman and you might have a shot. Be rich Superman.
Who reads the room knows when to speak and when to stay quiet. He can sense someone's discomfort, excitement or hesitation without needing to be told. That kind of awareness is so attractive because it signals empathy, leadership, and the ability to navigate social situations gracefully. It is a quiet power that draws people in without demanding attention. So, start practicing by simply paying closer attention to others reactions. Watch their body language, their tone, and their micro expressions. Notice how people respond when you speak and listen accordingly. In fact, I think listening more than you speak is one of the easiest ways to sharpen this skill over.
Just don't just don't be yourself. Basically, become uh become a projection of maybe what women might want. [laughter] Guys, just be yourself. It's all going to come out in the wash anyway. Unless you're short-term monster hunting, then yeah, tell them what you got to tell them. Pretend to be James Bond. Pretend to be Jason Bourne. Get them excited, you know, get keep the fantasy going. I'm all about it. Especially these types who are carrying on saying they want X, Y, and Z. Give them X, Y, and Z. If anything, you're doing them a favor. Think about it. They think that they got it. You know, they think they got the brain surgeon. They think they got the, you know, commando or the uh, you know, the special operations group SWAT team member. They think they got that. You know, really, you work down the local woolwards. You're cutting the watermelons out the back, but they don't know that. [laughter] Anyway, guys, bit of a different one today. Bit of a rant. Having a bit of fun here. Once again, if you want to support the channel, check out the locals. The links are in the video description, pin comment. Let's go over there. You don't have to pay. You can just follow for free. Trying to build it up over there. And uh there is also a if you do want to chip in, if you do want to support while the channel is demonetized, uh because I do have a number of people emailing me asking how to do it, PayPal. There the PayPal links in the video description. All righty. Thank you guys. See you in the next video.